Latest / The Paulie & Tony Fusco Show / Our Winter Olympics coverage GOT TOTALLY RUINED

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Our Winter Olympics coverage GOT TOTALLY RUINED · The Paulie & Tony Fusco Show

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  Speaker 1: The following content does not reflect the opinions of Fox
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  Speaker 1: Sports Radio. What it does reflect is your terrible choice
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  Speaker 1: in programming. All right, all right, you're you you damn
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  Speaker 1: to your life from Philly. It's the number one rated
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  Speaker 1: Polly and Tony Foosco show. Yo, as always Polly Foolsco
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  Speaker 1: here with Tony Foolsco and Dony. It's not just a
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  Speaker 1: huge show today, this is our special Winter Olympics Go
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  Speaker 1: and you know it almost didn't have people thanks to
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  Speaker 1: our useless producer over there. Yeah. You you know, the
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  Speaker 1: other day we found out that the Canadian beer company
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  Speaker 1: le bat Blue, who lets you say, we've had a
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  Speaker 1: bid of a rocky relationship with that. Yeah, they put
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  Speaker 1: out what we call in the business and RFB. Okay,
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  Speaker 1: and well that stands for well you should know, Yeah,
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  Speaker 1: that's it. Look it anyway, le Bat Blue they were
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  Speaker 1: offering one hundred k for any show that did a
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  Speaker 1: special Olympics episode. Now I meant an Olympics episode that's special,
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  Speaker 1: just anyway, an Olympics episode dedicated to the latest Olympic
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  Speaker 1: news and analysis while promoting the Bat Blue. But producer
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  Speaker 1: back there, idiot dummy, Well he didn't even tell us
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  Speaker 1: about that. Yeah, what are you going to do? What
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  Speaker 1: do you do?
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  Speaker 2: You're about to be the Black and Blue lose a
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  Speaker 2: good one.
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  Speaker 3: No, no, I didn't tell you because you guys know
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  Speaker 3: nothing about the Winter Olympics. Huh No, I bet you
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  Speaker 3: haven't watched the single second. No, a single second? Is
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  Speaker 3: how long your dates last?
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  Speaker 1: Yeah? They last a second and you are still single?
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  Speaker 1: Oh now shit, app yeah exactly. Yeah, anyway, don't mind
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  Speaker 1: that fool, because good news. At the twenty fifth hour,
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  Speaker 1: we rescued the deal. We called up the Bat Blue
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  Speaker 1: and while we got their voicemail, well, we told them
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  Speaker 1: over the line that we agreed to that dark and
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  Speaker 1: we will do it. And also, to be.
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  Speaker 2: Clear, since there's two of us, it's one hundred k each.
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  Speaker 1: Yep. So right now we're gonna bring you our special
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  Speaker 1: Winter Olympics episode. And by the way, as part of
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  Speaker 1: the deal, we also have to do several of these
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  Speaker 1: natural organic brand integrations as they call it. I'm reading
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  Speaker 1: the RFP here right here. But don't worry, you're not
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  Speaker 1: even gonna know.
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  Speaker 2: Notice it's not gonna interfere at all because it's baked
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  Speaker 2: in content.
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  Speaker 1: You're not even gonna know what happened, You're not even
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  Speaker 1: gonna know anyway. All right, with that, let's start up
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  Speaker 1: our Winter Olympics Special sponsored by the fine people are
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  Speaker 1: good friends at La bat Blue Winter Olympics Special sponsored
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  Speaker 1: by the good people at the Back Blue. Okay, see,
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  Speaker 1: you're probably thinking that you're listening right now to the
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  Speaker 1: NBC Olympic theme and now this is going to come
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  Speaker 1: as a surprise to you. But that in the business
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  Speaker 1: is what we call a sounderlike, okay, we're not spending
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  Speaker 1: one penny or the two hundred k on a music
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  Speaker 1: course when you can't even tell the difference right there, No,
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  Speaker 1: you can't. I thought that was the Olympic team I
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  Speaker 1: did anyway. All right, you know, we've been taking in
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  Speaker 1: so much of these Olympics through what we've seen on
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  Speaker 1: the NBC and the headlines on the ESPN homepage, and obviously,
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  Speaker 1: you know, any Olympic analyst knows the big story right
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  Speaker 1: now is men's figure skating and what went wrong with
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  Speaker 1: the favorite Ille Malkin. Yeah, the quad, God that's quad
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  Speaker 1: got any totally blue? Is chance at a medal? You
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  Speaker 1: watched the tape? Tell us what went wrong for him?
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  Speaker 2: I've watched a ton of figure skating in my life,
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  Speaker 2: once every four years, and I couldn't believe what I
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  Speaker 2: was seeing. You see, in figure skating, everyone knows the
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  Speaker 2: key is to not fall down, and yet this guy
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  Speaker 2: was falling all over the place. And I was like,
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  Speaker 2: how did this guy make the big team if he
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  Speaker 2: doesn't even know how skating works.
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  Speaker 1: I was thinking the exact same thing, you know, And
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  Speaker 1: you know why that guy fell down so much because
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  Speaker 1: he was spinning way too much. You know, well, what
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  Speaker 1: happens when you spin around all that much, you fall exactly.
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  Speaker 1: He was probably dizzy from all that needless spinning that
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  Speaker 1: it hurt his score. If I was his coach, I
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  Speaker 1: would have told him less spinning, more winning. Great advice
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  Speaker 1: that Dony and uh, Well, on the subject of great advice,
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  Speaker 1: are you feeling down maybe because you know you've blown
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  Speaker 1: the greatest opportunity that you worked your entire life for
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  Speaker 1: on the world stage and embarrassed yourself in front of
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  Speaker 1: millions and billions of people. Well, we've got the fix
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  Speaker 1: for you, a gold refreshing La bat Blue to take
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  Speaker 1: your mind off everything, right, Dony.
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  Speaker 2: Absolutely, And you know, if you want to develop a
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  Speaker 2: natural immunity to spin in. Then just drink daily amounts
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  Speaker 2: of Labat Blue, and within a few weeks you'll be
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  Speaker 2: spinning all the time, and that figure skating spinning will
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  Speaker 2: seem like nothing. Take it from me, I used to
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  Speaker 2: drink Ten's going on in the phone call?
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  Speaker 1: Sorry, it is one of the sales reps from that
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  Speaker 1: okay guy, Doug hold on, Oh Doug, yo, Yo. We're
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  Speaker 1: on the air right now. Bro. Whoa, whoa, whoa? Well,
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  Speaker 1: calm down, bro. Well, you know, first of all, you
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  Speaker 1: sound very upset. You know, it sounds like, frankly you
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  Speaker 1: could use a Labat Blue. Well, you can't cancel the deal.
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  Speaker 1: What what we we have a voicemail agreement.
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  Speaker 3: Bro.
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  Speaker 1: The show's already on the air. We're already rolling. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
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  Speaker 1: I hear you angry. Okay, look, look how about this.
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  Speaker 1: You you'll be a professional, okay and just shut up
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  Speaker 1: for a moment and let us be professionals and do
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  Speaker 1: our job. All right, So sit back, you'll say what
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  Speaker 1: we got this?
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  Speaker 2: All right?
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  Speaker 1: I hear you? All right? Bye? Bye? What was that
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  Speaker 1: all about? Something he said about doing damage to their
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  Speaker 1: brand or whatnot? I don't know, you know, I think
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  Speaker 1: you know, you know when you get a note and
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  Speaker 1: you gotta read between the lines. I think he just
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  Speaker 1: watched all positivity around.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's probably what he wanted exactly. Okay, we work
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  Speaker 2: with the sales, so look we'll do a positive story.
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  Speaker 2: We had one coming up. Okay, let's go move to
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  Speaker 2: the sport of bob sledding. Okay, bob sledting.
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  Speaker 1: Oh, this woman named Alana Mayers Taylor. Okay, she won
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  Speaker 1: the gold medal at age forty one and became the
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  Speaker 1: oldest person ever to win any Winter Olympics individual event, Tony,
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  Speaker 1: your thoughts it?
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  Speaker 2: You know a lot of people are saying this was
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  Speaker 2: a surprise, but I wasn't surprised because what do old
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  Speaker 2: people do all day?
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  Speaker 1: They sit? Where do they sit in rocking chairs? Well?
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  Speaker 2: Is it a bob sled just basically an ice rocking chair,
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  Speaker 2: you know. Frankly, I would figure the oldest someone gets,
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  Speaker 2: the better they'd get.
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  Speaker 1: Same here, Tony, when you'll think about it, the older
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  Speaker 1: and more frail their bones get, well, the lighter that
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  Speaker 1: Bob's letter becomes, right, which makes the more aerodynamic and
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  Speaker 1: aerodynamic exactly.
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  Speaker 2: In fact, you know what I'm gonna take my ninety
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  Speaker 2: seven year old grandmother and strap her into a bob
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  Speaker 2: sled and see how fast she can go. You know,
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  Speaker 2: she might be in the Olympics in four years, yeah,
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  Speaker 2: or dead you know.
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  Speaker 1: Well yeah, but if she's dead, you know that will
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  Speaker 1: only make a lighter and more aerodynamic when you think
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  Speaker 1: about it, Donnie Alley.
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  Speaker 2: And you know if she dies, she'll turn blue like
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  Speaker 2: Le Bat blue.
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  Speaker 1: You know, just a terrific segue, that, Dony, because ain't
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  Speaker 1: you you know, whether you're dead or alive, it's always
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  Speaker 1: a good dime for an ice cold, refreshing La Bat blue,
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  Speaker 1: you know, blue and ice cold, just like Tony's dead grandmother.
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  Speaker 1: Hold on, what is it now, Doug. We're doing a show.
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  Speaker 1: We're doing a show. Whoa you have got the calm
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  Speaker 1: down bro. I thought you Canadians were calm chill you know, Frankly,
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  Speaker 1: you'll need twenty La bat blues. You have to calm down.
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  Speaker 1: And I'm counting that as a brand integration to that absolutely. Yeah.
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  Speaker 1: Oh oh, we're embarrassing your brand. You're embarrassing yourself, interrupting
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  Speaker 1: our show. You're worse than our idiot producer back there, Yeah, no, no, no,
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  Speaker 1: there's no backing out of the deal. Now, don't. Okay,
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  Speaker 1: we have a deal. If anybody's gonna be backing, it's
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  Speaker 1: gonna be you backing up off a cliff when I
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  Speaker 1: throw you off of it. All right, So listen, you're
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  Speaker 1: gonna do your job and shut up, and I'm gonna
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  Speaker 1: do my job and finish the show. Bye. What'd he say? Canadian?
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  Speaker 1: Who cares what he said? We're gonna finish the show
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  Speaker 1: and get our money, Tony. That's what's gonna happen. Anyway,
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  Speaker 1: Let's keep on a special with the Olympics show going
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  Speaker 1: here this You see this story, Tony, there's a scandal
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  Speaker 1: rocking the sport of ski jumping. The athletes they're allegedly
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  Speaker 1: in rejecting their penises with fluid to make their suits
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  Speaker 1: cover more surface area, which apparently makes them fly farther
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  Speaker 1: in the air. Tony, your reaction to the story.
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  Speaker 2: I mean, you know, it's the same reaction anyone would have.
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  Speaker 2: You know, I don't think we're sending the right athletes
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  Speaker 2: to do ski jumping. If our country is serious about winning,
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  Speaker 2: we should have just sent the US men's basketball team.
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  Speaker 2: You know, they're already Olympians. It's the All Star break,
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  Speaker 2: so they have time and they can already jump really high.
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  Speaker 1: And also you know that you know, of course, of course,
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  Speaker 1: So hold on, Tony, our producer back there is giving
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  Speaker 1: us the stink guy. What what do you want?
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  Speaker 3: You want to finish that thought?
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  Speaker 1: Finish what thought? It's obvious, it's obvious.
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  Speaker 3: I think I know what you're saying, and it's an
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  Speaker 3: efect of stereotype.
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  Speaker 1: Oh well, you're offensive to the human eye.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, and let's just say you're not making any ski
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  Speaker 2: jump teams anytime soon.
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  Speaker 1: If you catch my drift. Yeah, there you go. Yeah,
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  Speaker 1: now be quiet. You're worse than this little bat blue
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  Speaker 1: guy between the both of them, exactly. All right. Uh,
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  Speaker 1: you know, we got more time to affiliate Tony. You
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  Speaker 1: got any more stories Olympic stories you want to talk about?
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  Speaker 1: You know?
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  Speaker 2: Uh, those were really the only three things I heard about.
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  Speaker 1: Yep, same it, Tony. Yeah, you know, why don't we
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  Speaker 1: just will go chuck ESPN dot gae what's going on here?
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  Speaker 3: Yeah?
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  Speaker 1: I don't must do that? All right, hold on, just
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  Speaker 1: type of this in here right at ESPN dot com.
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  Speaker 1: Let's see what's going on. Wait a second, Tony, hold on,
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  Speaker 1: just a bum hit that breaking those sound and we
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  Speaker 1: got breaking. Those We have to interrupt our Winter Olympics coverage,
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  Speaker 1: Tony to bring you this break. Those reports said Tyreek
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  Speaker 1: Hill might be considering going back to the Chiefs after
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  Speaker 1: getting released by the Dolphins. Wow, and this is you know,
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  Speaker 1: this reminds me, Dony, you had some inside saucing on
• 11:13
  Speaker 1: when went down in Miami with Tyreek earlier this week,
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  Speaker 1: didn't you. Absolutely?
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  Speaker 2: You know, my sources told me this was an extremely
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  Speaker 2: confusing week for Tyreek. Apparently, when Tyreek Hill found out
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  Speaker 2: he was getting a release, he was confused because he
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  Speaker 2: had already released three times that afternoon. Then when his
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  Speaker 2: agent clarified that it was Miami giving him the release,
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  Speaker 2: Tyreek became even more confused because he didn't know a.
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  Speaker 1: Woman named Miami.
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  Speaker 2: Then his agent clarified that it was the Miami football
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  Speaker 2: team given him the release. Tyreek then became even more
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  Speaker 2: confused because you know, how can you have sex with
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  Speaker 2: the football team. Then the agent clarified and told Tyreek
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  Speaker 2: they were cutting him, but Tyrekreek said he didn't want
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  Speaker 2: a vasectomy. Than the agent clarified and told him they
• 12:05
  Speaker 2: were cutting him from the football team. And that's when
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  Speaker 2: Tyreek realized he could no longer play in Miami and
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  Speaker 2: would need to go have sex somewhere else.
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  Speaker 1: Just great saucing Dony all time. Let me to silence
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  Speaker 1: my phony. Oh yeah, good idea this dog. By the way,
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  Speaker 1: when you look at all the possible themes for Tyreek Hill,
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  Speaker 1: who's sticking out to you, Dony.
• 12:29
  Speaker 2: Well, I've broken down all of Tyreek Hill's stats, his
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  Speaker 2: numbers on the field and also the numbers in his
• 12:37
  Speaker 2: bank account, which is getting low due to the dozens
• 12:40
  Speaker 2: upon thousands of child support payments he has. It seems
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  Speaker 2: to me Tyreek needs to find a team that would
• 12:47
  Speaker 2: boost his production but lower his reproduction. To me, that
• 12:53
  Speaker 2: narrows the field to two teams, Green Bay and Buffalo.
• 12:58
  Speaker 2: The weather's so cold there that it will reduce his
• 13:01
  Speaker 2: sperm cow and he'll have better quarterbacks because he won't
• 13:05
  Speaker 2: have to deal with a crappy QB like Tua who
• 13:09
  Speaker 2: literally is incapable of throwing a football and also putting
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  Speaker 2: together a coherent thought. What does this mean for Tyreek overall?
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  Speaker 2: Improved ball control on and off the field.
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  Speaker 1: Just tremendous analysis all around that, Dony And oh you
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  Speaker 1: kidding me? I thought I put the phone on silent
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  Speaker 1: hold on a moment, Tony, What is it now, Doug, Doug, Yeah,
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  Speaker 1: I know it's the Olympic special, Okay, but we had
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  Speaker 1: breaking news. It's called being a journalist to see we
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  Speaker 1: report the truth. And the truth right now is that
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  Speaker 1: you are a giant douchebag. And after the show, I'm
• 13:46
  Speaker 1: gonna make you le black and blood. Yeah. Oh oh
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: you feel threatened? So oh a violation, violation of the contract.
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  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, go call your lawyer's Doug. Yea, go call them,
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  Speaker 1: because you know who I'm gonna call. Here's who I'm
• 14:03
  Speaker 1: gonna call you, Canadian. I'm gonna call a caribou to
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  Speaker 1: violate you with this giant moose cut goodbye, lose, hang
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  Speaker 1: up bottom Canadian loser. Yeah, well, the deal's off, Tony.
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  Speaker 1: I guess he says we violated the contract or whatever, whatever. Whatever.
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  Speaker 1: You know, we don't need it, Tony. You know we
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  Speaker 1: got millions of money rolling in anyway. We don't need him. No,
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  Speaker 1: we don't need to talk Olympics on the show. No,
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  Speaker 1: but we I guess we do need to figure out
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  Speaker 1: other topics, Tony. And you know, why don't we just
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  Speaker 1: take a quick break, gather our thoughts like we'll call
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: a lawyer and we'll be right back, all right, them,
• 14:49
  Speaker 1: we're back from break. And during during the break, we
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: got a call from our legal team. Yeah, and well
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: they have advised us to say no more about the
• 15:02
  Speaker 1: Bat Blue and it's subsidiaries and holding something else, they said.
• 15:07
  Speaker 1: And they also told us it was in our best
• 15:11
  Speaker 1: legal interest to wrap the show right here. And uh, well,
• 15:15
  Speaker 1: you know, Tony and I have much legal expertise, more
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: than our legal thing, of course, and we we we
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  Speaker 1: have chosen that we think, you know, the show is
• 15:23
  Speaker 1: good enough. We made this, We're gonna wrap it. You know.
• 15:28
  Speaker 1: You you go your rate and review the show. But
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: you're a visit at you got to do? Do you
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: listen to our legal teams told us to wrap the show? Yeah?
• 15:38
  Speaker 1: What do you want? Are you doing?
• 15:41
  Speaker 3: Just?
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: God's gonna be worth the jail time that you might. Yeah,
• 15:45
  Speaker 1: you're going to jail. Bro? Go what go? You said?
• 15:49
  Speaker 3: The name of the American figure skater was Ilia Maulkin.
• 15:53
  Speaker 1: Yeah, bro, yeah, because that's his name. Bro.
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  Speaker 3: No, No, his name is Ilia Melanin, not Mulkin. I'm
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  Speaker 3: pretty sure you're confusing him with you, Genny Malkin the
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  Speaker 3: hockey player.
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  Speaker 1: No, you know what's confusing the fact that you're alive
• 16:09
  Speaker 1: right now, and that reminds me.
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  Speaker 2: I have a name for your penis. You have Genny
• 16:14
  Speaker 2: small King. Oh great one downy? Why still go and worry?
• 16:23
  Speaker 1: You said?
• 16:23
  Speaker 3: Basically, bob sled is an easy sport that any old
• 16:26
  Speaker 3: person can do, and call the bob sled and ice
• 16:30
  Speaker 3: rocking chair.
• 16:31
  Speaker 1: Yeah, how hard can it be? Bro? Anybody can do it, Broye.
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  Speaker 3: That's insulting. There's are high level athletes who train their
• 16:39
  Speaker 3: whole lives to do that. You wouldn't last three seconds?
• 16:45
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, well, uh, you know who's also trained their
• 16:48
  Speaker 1: whole lives my Rottweiler to maul you.
• 16:52
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and you know who else wouldn't last three seconds?
• 16:55
  Speaker 2: Yo with the woman?
• 16:57
  Speaker 1: Oh doty. Just when you thought this episode was going
• 17:03
  Speaker 1: to go out on a loan note, don't worry people.
• 17:05
  Speaker 1: Next week just booked Eagles legend super Bowl hero Nick
• 17:09
  Speaker 1: Foles backup, always coming, always anyway. He don't forget your
• 17:16
  Speaker 1: rate and review the show on outre stall. You go
• 17:20
  Speaker 1: to the merch store, you buy the mer by them.
• 17:22
  Speaker 1: It's like you subscribe your comment. You get to a
• 17:24
  Speaker 1: world people and talking about work.
• 17:27
  Speaker 2: Doughty, great job as always, Same to you, Poorly, another
• 17:31
  Speaker 2: fluorally show.
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: We'll see people next week. See your