Latest / Good Morning From The Chicken Coop! / Season 4 - Episode 237 - Let's talk about Negative Self-talk!

Transcript

Season 4 - Episode 237 - Let's talk about Negative Self-talk! · Good Morning From The Chicken Coop!

• 0:01
  Hey. Everybody, welcome to the Good
• 0:03
  Morning from the Chicken Coop podcast.
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  My name is Kim Johnson and I am a mastermindset, coach, creative
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  strategist, and also happened to be a farmer.
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  This is my Chicken coop and I come out here.
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  Every day to record a podcast to.
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  Teach distinctions, possibilities, new ways of
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  thinking, and just bring some joy.
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  Into the world. So welcome to the coop and let's
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  start your day off in a fantastic way.
• 0:27
  Hey, everybody. Good morning.
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  Let's talk negative self talk today because it happens
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  non-stop in our heads and we don't really even pay attention
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  to it. We are so desensitized to what
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  we say to ourselves that we have very little awareness of it.
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  Half the time it's popping up and we don't even pay attention
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  to it. It's just so normal to us to
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  have it. So right now, I want you to stop
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  and pause. And I want you to think about
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  how many times in a day do you get annoyed with yourself?
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  Do you chastise yourself? Do you say things that are very
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  clearly things that you should not necessarily say to yourself,
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  yet you are, Yet you're saying these negative things to
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  yourself. You're engaged in a, in a full
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  conversation in your head. These things can look like very
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  benign. They can look like they're very
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  simple, but they do a ton of damage because you're not giving
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  yourself that that awareness that those things beat you up,
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  whether you're saying them to yourself or someone else is
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  saying them to you. It's definitely a thing that
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  that happens in our minds and that negativity is, in my
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  opinion, it's worse when it comes from us over and over
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  because it's very covert, it's very behind the scenes and we
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  are not aware of it. So give you a good example.
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  If you think you suck at something, then you and you and
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  you don't want to suck at that thing, especially if you don't
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  want to suck at it, it and you start telling yourself that over
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  and over and over again. You create that that self talk
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  that goes on and on about your not being good at something and
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  then that becomes your identity. So I'm going to use myself as an
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  example because it's always the easiest way to go about this
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  when it comes to cooking. I have never been.
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  I was never the person that was taught to cook when I was
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  little. My mother cooked, but she had
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  her specific meals, let's just say it that way.
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  She had her specific meals that she would make, but I don't
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  think she ever loved cooking and I think she always struggled
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  with it and she never really learned it.
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  And nothing was ever like out of the park.
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  Oh, that's delicious. It was food and my dad brought a
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  lot of take home. I like that's just the truth.
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  We had a lot of take out because he just, I don't think he really
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  loved her food. And like I, I don't remember
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  having a Thanksgiving or a Christmas where the entire meal
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  came out all at the same time. And my mom would get very
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  frustrated. My dad would get very
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  frustrated. The Turkey wasn't done, the
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  vegetables were done. It was always chaos and one of
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  the things that I did not learn in that house growing up, while
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  I had AI mean a super loving house growing up, it was I did
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  not learn about food and how to cook food.
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  So I gravitated more to the solution that my dad had, which
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  was I'll just grab stuff out. So I would go to the grocery
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  store and I was on my own. I would buy things that were
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  already prepared. I would keep things simple.
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  I'm an outstanding sandwich maker.
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  Like that is something that I learned to make all kinds of
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  really cool sandwiches. Like my sandwiches I know are
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  out of the park. Everyone says it.
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  Well, I poured into that because sandwiches are easier, easier to
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  make. But then as time went on, I
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  really wanted to get better at cooking.
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  I went to Rhode Island school of design had these like off
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  classes where you could take them for learning how to cook.
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  And I went to six week cooking programs multiple times to learn
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  how to do things to break my pattern because in my mind I
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  would always say, well, I suck at cooking, I suck at cooking, I
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  suck at cooking. Like that was my my mantra,
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  which became my identity. So those words matter because it
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  became my identity. Because if someone ever said,
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  well, let's cook dinner, I'd be like, well, I don't cook like
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  it. Immediately.
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  That was my response because that self talk, that non-stop
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  self talk of like what wasn't good, negative self talk was
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  taking over. Now here's the here's the
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  reality. I love following patterns.
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  I love following rules. So recipes are rules.
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  So you follow the recipe. There's no rocket science here,
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  my friends. It's follow the recipe.
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  So why did I come up with this identity that I sucked at it?
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  Because there are recipe books everywhere, everywhere.
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  And when I take out a recipe book and I use the recipe book,
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  I have evidence that I don't suck at cooking.
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  Or I can look at that and go, well, that's just a recipe.
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  I can't wing it. So then I can go back to that
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  identity, which means this negative self talk 1 as opposed
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  to just saying, well, no, following somebody else's trial
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  and error is smart. It means I don't have to suffer
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  the pain. You see how this can work in
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  your head where you've got to grab those things and shift that
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  language and shift that pattern so that you can fix it.
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  That's what I'm talking about. So take a look at the negative
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  self talk that goes on. Really be honest with yourself
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  about it like that. Like just because I'm following
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  a recipe doesn't mean I can't cook.
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  What it means is I'm smart enough to go out and say, ah,
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  you paved this path. I'm going to take that path.
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  Very similar to when the the people were moving across the
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  country and everyone was taking wagon trains.
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  Those wagon trains went on a path that was already blazed.
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  They didn't go and start it themselves, the original ones
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  did. But once that was done, they
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  stuck to the path. So we can learn from this my
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  friends. So listen.
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  Looking for the recipe books, see it.
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  Find those negative self talk patterns and change them.
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  Don't let them take over because that changes everything.
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  All right, my friends, I hope you have a blessed day and I'll
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  see you tomorrow. Bye.