Latest / Beyond Fulfillment Podcast / Building a Life You Were Born For: Jonathan Domsky’s Guide to Fulfillment for Entrepreneurs

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Building a Life You Were Born For: Jonathan Domsky’s Guide to Fulfillment for Entrepreneurs · Beyond Fulfillment Podcast

• 0:05
  And I make 10 of those calls and I get a referral.
• 0:08
  And that's how I built my business.
• 0:11
  Today we're joined by entrepreneur and coach Jonathan Domsky.
• 0:16
  Jonathan's journey started with a one way ticket to China, where he perfected his Mandarin and found.
• 0:26
  He later launched Kadorable, a wildly successful children's accessory business.
• 0:30
  And after two decades as a thriving entrepreneur, Jonathan realized what truly lit him up.
• 0:36
  Helping others get unstuck and live more meaningful and joyful lives.
• 0:40
  That epiphany led him to found Untangled Coaching, where he now empowers entrepreneurs to unlock fulfillment, not just success.
• 0:49
  In this episode, Jonathan shares how he transitioned from building products to building people.
• 0:54
  He opens up about the power of positive vision, the real challenges entrepreneurs face beyond business, and why getting out of your own way is the ultimate key to lasting happiness.
• 1:06
  Get ready for actionable insights, inspiring client stories, and a refreshing take on what fulfillment really means.
• 1:14
  As always, if you found value from this content, please like and subscribe.
• 1:19
  All right, Jonathan Domsky, welcome to Beyond Fulfillment.
• 1:23
  Pleasure to be here.
• 1:24
  There's nowhere else I'd rather be right now than with you, Dave.
• 1:28
  Excited that you're here.
• 1:29
  Glad to hear that.
• 1:30
  And let's dive right in.
• 1:32
  Yeah.
• 1:33
  So, Jonathan, you've been an entrepreneur for quite a long time and you founded Untangled Coaching five years ago.
• 1:42
  So was there a like an aha moment where you realized, like, I've got to build this?
• 1:49
  Yeah, there certainly was, David.
• 1:51
  It was a single day, January 31, 2020, right before anyone had heard of COVID It was a Friday afternoon like any other.
• 2:00
  And I took a walk from my home near Lake Michigan up to the lake and to Northwestern University campus to clear my head, process the week like any other.
• 2:09
  But this week, the moment that the water came into view, it felt like I was riding an avalanche.
• 2:16
  I was literally unsteady.
• 2:17
  I needed to sit down.
• 2:19
  And I realized in an instant that I could no longer devote my work energy to something that doesn't light me up, that I'd love to learn.
• 2:27
  I'm great at teaching.
• 2:28
  The world needs entrepreneurs who have clarity on who they are, where they're going, how to get there.
• 2:33
  And then I was born to be a coach.
• 2:36
  The instant was just as soon as that leg came into view.
• 2:40
  But it was a 20 year journey that made that instant happen.
• 2:45
  You can't make an avalanche happen, but you can.
• 2:48
  You could cause the conditions that make it more likely to happen.
• 2:52
  Okay, so the previous 20 years kind of all led into that moment where you had that, that Epiphany, so to speak, that this is what you're meant to do.
• 3:01
  Can you, can you just walk us through what you were doing at that point and what, what led up to that moment?
• 3:06
  Sure.
• 3:07
  So the week that I graduated from college, 1994, I was on a plane with a one way ticket to China.
• 3:14
  I spent the next 17 months there and I was expecting to have an adventure.
• 3:18
  And I did.
• 3:19
  I was expecting to perfect my Chinese.
• 3:21
  That happened too.
• 3:22
  I was not expecting that three weeks in, I'd meet the woman that I'd be married to for the next 29 years.
• 3:26
  But that happened too.
• 3:28
  And we were used to spending all of our time together, like 20, 23 and a half plus hours a day.
• 3:33
  And when I came back to the us when she came to the US for the first time, we wanted to be able to keep doing that.
• 3:37
  We wanted to be able to keep going back to China.
• 3:39
  And it just seemed like it'd be hard to do that with a nine to five job and two weeks of vacation a year.
• 3:45
  So we decided to become entrepreneurs.
• 3:47
  And Dave, I had no background in entrepreneurship.
• 3:50
  Both my parents are professionals.
• 3:52
  I was a junior in college before I realized there were a million things to do in this world and that being a doctor and lawyer were only two of them.
• 3:58
  But here we are.
• 3:59
  And I'm a learner.
• 4:00
  I've read over 3,000 books.
• 4:01
  I would talk to anybody who had anything to teach me.
• 4:05
  The business took off.
• 4:06
  We started a children's accessory business called Kiddorable.
• 4:10
  If you've ever seen umbrellas or rainbows look like frogs and ladybugs, stuff like that, that was us.
• 4:16
  And the company took off.
• 4:18
  I joined EO YEO back then, the Young Entrepreneurs Organization.
• 4:22
  We're not all so young anymore, but EO taught me everything I know about being an entrepreneur.
• 4:29
  And if you had asked me 20 years ago, am I passionate about my business, I would have told you, yes.
• 4:34
  But if you had asked me to.
• 4:35
  Selling fun, practical, unique children's accessories make my heart sing.
• 4:39
  It's like, no, not really.
• 4:40
  I mean, I learned how to become an efficient manager and an inspiring entrepreneur and a lot of that sort of stuff.
• 4:46
  But the heart of my work week, what really lit me up was the 10 or so hours that I would spend in meetings.
• 4:53
  I love meetings because good meetings, they're the only kind worth having.
• 4:57
  They, they're where I help people accomplish their goals.
• 5:01
  It's where people come in, where we solve problems.
• 5:04
  People come in with confusion and frustration and they leave with clarity and inspiration and After a couple decades, the company was pretty highly optimized.
• 5:14
  I was working from home a couple hours a day, going into the office once a a week for face to face meetings.
• 5:21
  And it was shortly after that that I had that epiphany that I was born to be a coach.
• 5:26
  Okay.
• 5:27
  Wow.
• 5:27
  So you come straight out of college, you go to China, you, You fall in love, you develop this idea for a business.
• 5:39
  When you come back, business takes off.
• 5:41
  And you spend the next 20 years or so building and optimizing, perfecting that business.
• 5:47
  And, and then you come to this moment where you realize, like, you're not fulfilled.
• 5:52
  Yeah, right.
• 5:53
  Like success, but not fulfillment.
• 5:56
  Yeah, good.
• 5:57
  But it didn't light me up.
• 5:59
  It had become road, it'd become routine.
• 6:01
  It was no longer, it was no longer as much fun as it was when we started.
• 6:06
  It was time for something new, something that was more.
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  More soul based, something that I was born for, not something I was merely great at and enjoyed.
• 6:15
  Okay.
• 6:16
  And so you have that epiphany.
• 6:18
  You realize that you want to be a coach and you're meant to.
• 6:22
  That's what really lights your soul up, is helping others solve their problems.
• 6:26
  And, and like you said, it's.
• 6:29
  Little did you know it back then, but you're.
• 6:31
  You're months before the world changed, like.
• 6:34
  Like we'd never seen it.
• 6:37
  So to talk about that moment and what, like what you did next, how you went about transitioning into being a coach.
• 6:44
  Yeah.
• 6:45
  So I knew that I was born to be a coach.
• 6:48
  I knew I could do this work, but I did not know how to sell coaching services.
• 6:57
  You know, I didn't know how to do the business of coaching.
• 7:01
  I knew how to do the action of coaching, not the business of coaching.
• 7:04
  So I called my friends.
• 7:06
  I am blessed to know at least a dozen really wonderful coaches.
• 7:11
  And one time I called them up, I told them the same story I told you and that I need to do this thing, but I need help.
• 7:17
  How do I do it?
• 7:18
  How do I start, how do I start getting clients?
• 7:23
  Because it doesn't work.
• 7:24
  That you just put it out into the universe and then people start knocking on your door.
• 7:29
  A vision is essential.
• 7:30
  And I certainly had a coaching vision that I live into that was a real guide, especially for those early years.
• 7:38
  But the way that I actually started my business is I made a list of all the people who really knew me, who believed in me, wanted me to be successful, and had the potential to refer me to the
• 7:50
  entrepreneurial clients who I work with.
• 7:52
  And I would call them up, catch up.
• 7:55
  Hey, what's going on?
• 7:55
  And I tell them that I was, you know, I'm on this mission to become a coach, tell them what I was about.
• 8:02
  And do you know anyone who would benefit from an introduction?
• 8:05
  And made 50 of those calls, and that was enough to launch the business.
• 8:09
  Okay, so 50 calls right away from people you know and your network and everything you'd built up over the 20 years?
• 8:17
  Yeah.
• 8:17
  And from there you got clients to.
• 8:20
  To basically launch and get going.
• 8:22
  Yeah.
• 8:23
  Okay.
• 8:24
  And that.
• 8:26
  How long did that.
• 8:27
  That process play out for?
• 8:29
  That just took a couple months.
• 8:31
  And I just want to check in real quick.
• 8:33
  Dave, I have just some noise that suddenly came in my background.
• 8:36
  Could you hear it or do we sound good now?
• 8:38
  We sound good.
• 8:39
  Okay, great.
• 8:42
  Getting over a cold.
• 8:44
  So those 50 calls were enough to get started.
• 8:47
  And there's all these coaches to the business of coaching.
• 8:52
  And I spent about a year spending $60 or $70,000 and probably about a thousand hours of my time trying and utterly failing how to learn to sell to people online, strangers online.
• 9:08
  I know there's people who do it who are very successful with it, but I'm nothing if not a good student, Dave.
• 9:14
  And I did everything that they told me to do, and I didn't get a single sales call out of it, posting every single day, putting out what I thought was really great content.
• 9:23
  The only people who responded to what I put out there were my own friends, other coaches, and people who are looking to sell to me.
• 9:32
  The last of these people, these coaches of the business of coaching that I contacted told me, jonathan, I could tell you right away why your marketing is not working.
• 9:43
  And I said, okay, here's $10,000.
• 9:44
  Tell me, you know, tell me why my marketing is not working.
• 9:47
  They said, well, there's really two reasons you sell to successful entrepreneurs.
• 9:53
  Selling online is mostly for newbies, you know, people just trying to get started.
• 9:58
  Most successful entrepreneurs, we have networks, we have forums.
• 10:00
  We want to coach.
• 10:01
  We ask our friends.
• 10:03
  The second thing is, I am both a business and life coach for entrepreneurs.
• 10:08
  I help you have a business in life that feels more effortless, more meaningful, more joyous.
• 10:13
  Those are the measures of success worth having in life.
• 10:16
  So it says, me, I'm the guy you call when you're finally ready to learn what it is that you were born to do and how to do it.
• 10:26
  And that's a much narrower niche.
• 10:28
  It's easy to sell to people that you're going to help make the money.
• 10:33
  And that's usually the happy result of what I do.
• 10:36
  It's easy to sell to people that you're going to help save the money.
• 10:39
  That's also again the happy result of usually what I do.
• 10:41
  But far fewer people are willing to pay for fulfillment, happiness, ease in their relationships and in work life.
• 10:51
  And he gave me permission, like you know, mental permission to stop doing all that promotion and selling and just do the only thing that I've ever found that actually works.
• 11:04
  And it's do good work when people talk about you and keep in touch with your friends.
• 11:10
  And I started this business for that list of 50 people.
• 11:13
  That list now has close to 200 people now and two to six times a year I call up my friends and I tell them what I'm up to and I ask them what they're up to and I add
• 11:23
  value.
• 11:24
  I do what I do.
• 11:24
  I don't turn this off.
• 11:25
  This is just who I am.
• 11:31
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• 11:40
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• 11:54
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• 12:01
  And I make 10 of those calls and I get a referral and that's how I built my business.
• 12:07
  Interesting.
• 12:09
  Well, a couple things I noticed there, number one, you certainly being an entrepreneur for, for 20 years prior that that bias for action is so important so, and not afraid to fail and certainly having the self awareness to
• 12:24
  see that it's not working and ask for help and continue to revise and adjust and course correct as you go on.
• 12:31
  And then like you said, you found out what's working, you're willing to seek out advice and you just basically double, double, triple down on what's working and continue to stay in touch with your friends.
• 12:43
  Yeah, it started early on that I wanted to be part of the work that I do with clients is to help them create a positive vision for their future.
• 12:59
  Most people to the extent that they have a vision for, they want to go at all, they have a negative vision, they have a victim's vision.
• 13:03
  I just want it to stop sucking so badly.
• 13:06
  You know, I just wanted, you know, I, I want to start a business so I don't have to report to my boss who's a jerk or you know, I just want to fix the sales problem or something like
• 13:16
  that.
• 13:17
  The problem with a negative vision is it's fine to get you started because whenever there's a gap between where you are right now, where you want to go.
• 13:26
  Now let's take a classic example.
• 13:27
  I know this isn't your issue, but someone wants to lose weight.
• 13:30
  They want to lose weight because they're tired of their clothes being so tight.
• 13:34
  So they do what you'd expect.
• 13:35
  They diet and they exercise, they lose a little bit of weight and their clothes aren't so tight anymore.
• 13:40
  So there's no reason to do those healthy activities.
• 13:43
  And that's that classic yo yo dieter.
• 13:45
  In contrast, that same person, they want to lose weight, but they want to lose weight because they want to look good, they want to have energy, they want to feel better.
• 13:51
  So they diet and they exercise and they're feeling better and they have more energy.
• 13:54
  And it's self sustaining, a positive vision for what you want for your life.
• 14:00
  When I started, I said I, I declare the possibility.
• 14:04
  And all visions start with I declare the possibility because this isn't who you are right now.
• 14:08
  It's the best version of your future self, who we live into in the present.
• 14:12
  That's how a great vision guides you towards where you want to go.
• 14:16
  I declare the possibility that I am a master coach and entrepreneur with a unique perspective on business and relationships, who shares my gifts with the world and someone who acts, who comes up with ideas and tries them, who's
• 14:29
  not afraid to fail and fail again until I find a joyful solution that works.
• 14:35
  That's the vision that I created when I first started coaching.
• 14:38
  I'm a highly introverted person, Dave.
• 14:41
  When I had that list of 50 people, I first started calling, I don't know, two or three a week.
• 14:47
  And after a couple weeks, you know, each morning I see this vision before I open my eyes and I finish saying, and I'm like, really?
• 14:54
  For someone who acts, who's not afraid to fail and fail again, I can only make two calls a week.
• 14:59
  And then I, that's when I started making five calls a day.
• 15:02
  To really launch the business, you have to turn that vision into action.
• 15:06
  Yeah, I love that with the action.
• 15:08
  So that's interesting too because you're highly introverted and clearly you had that, that success with the, the products company and, but now doing something with coaching and learning how to sell your coaching services in the business, that's a
• 15:26
  radical shift from, from being basically like a manager that's optimizing and growing a business.
• 15:33
  Sure.
• 15:34
  The sales are all done online versus actually having to get out there.
• 15:38
  So, so how challenging was that for you in terms of like the mindset and what was going through your head when you're realizing, like, I've got to really get out of my comfort zone to, to make this work.
• 15:51
  Yeah.
• 15:52
  So for anyone who wants to grow their business, they first have to grow themselves.
• 15:58
  You could read all the books you want.
• 16:01
  If all you do is read a book, it's highly unlikely, you know, without actually growing yourself, it's highly unlikely that you're going to have success.
• 16:09
  Skills building, learning, learning how to sell, learning all these things.
• 16:12
  Of course it's an essential element of any growth program.
• 16:16
  And I did need to learn how to sell.
• 16:18
  I did need to find, you know, the, the sales style that fits with me.
• 16:23
  But so many people, and this is especially true of solopreneurs, people who are selling, selling themselves, it's often very uncomfortable for us to sell to people.
• 16:34
  You know, we have these negative ideas about what sales is and this idea that it's somehow taking advantage of people or something like that.
• 16:43
  The advice that I give people in the lesson that I need to learn is if you really know who you are and who you are is a three legged stool, the easiest, most accessible leg of that stool is
• 16:58
  how your life should be lived, how your life should be lived.
• 17:01
  Not, not because I say it's the way it should be lived.
• 17:03
  Just because of your DNA and your upbringing and your beliefs.
• 17:07
  How your life should be lived is your core values.
• 17:10
  And you can apply those core values to any challenge in life.
• 17:14
  So as applied to the challenge of sales, you know, list your core value.
• 17:18
  Number one, what is the fullest, most satisfying expression of that value is applied to the challenge of sales core value.
• 17:26
  Number two, what's the fullest, most satisfying expression of that value as applied to the challenge of sales?
• 17:31
  State your purpose.
• 17:33
  As applied to the challenge of sales, what's the fullest, most satisfying expression of your purpose?
• 17:39
  My purpose, for example, is to untangle the clutter obscuring our best, most authentic selves so that we have a clear path to a life and business that feels more effortless, meaningful and joyous.
• 17:53
  So my sales call is the fullest, most satisfying expression of my purpose.
• 17:59
  I, you know, once I receive a referral and we have a call like this, the first thing I do is I help them articulate a vision for their beautiful future, which most people can't do by themselves.
• 18:10
  Like they need someone like me to help draw them, draw it out of them.
• 18:14
  And then once they see this Beautiful future that they're like, wow.
• 18:20
  Like, that would be amazing.
• 18:23
  Then we talk about, well, there's where you want to go and it's entirely achievable, by the way.
• 18:28
  Well, where are you right now?
• 18:31
  Tell me where you are right now.
• 18:32
  What have you tried?
• 18:33
  What hasn't?
• 18:34
  What's your current circumstances?
• 18:35
  And then what's missing?
• 18:37
  What are the steps that we need to take to bridge that gap?
• 18:40
  That's my sales call, which is exactly what I do during a coaching call.
• 18:44
  It's the fullest, most satisfying expression of my purpose.
• 18:47
  Untangling the clutter.
• 18:48
  All these details that just weigh people down, hold them back from the life they were born for.
• 18:53
  So it's joyful and it's easy and it's fun and it doesn't feel like I have to take a shower afterwards.
• 18:58
  Does that make sense?
• 19:00
  Yeah.
• 19:01
  Yeah.
• 19:01
  And let me just ask you, being that you've coached so many entrepreneurs, what are some of the common issues that people come to you, and particularly when you're selling to successful and higher level entrepreneurs, what are some of
• 19:15
  the common issues that you see that people need help with?
• 19:19
  Yeah.
• 19:20
  So my favorite type of client is a passionate master of their craft, where there's very little that I could teach them about what they actually do for a living.
• 19:32
  You know, Dave, I.
• 19:33
  It's.
• 19:33
  It's highly unlikely that I could teach you to be a better leader of a 3 PL.
• 19:39
  What I do is I help people get out of their own way so they could hit the open road.
• 19:44
  One of my clients said that he felt like a Ferrari trapped in the parking garage.
• 19:49
  Like he just wanted to get out of his own way and hit the open road.
• 19:53
  And there's basically five reasons why smart, hardworking people don't have the life, don't have the business that they're working so hard for.
• 20:01
  First, we already discussed, they don't know who they are.
• 20:03
  They're living someone else's idea of what their life should be instead of their own authentic vision.
• 20:09
  The next is, do they have that compelling vision that magnetically pulls them towards it?
• 20:13
  Do they know where they're going?
• 20:14
  Are they just kind of going scattershot or going through the motions?
• 20:18
  If you know who you are, if you know where you're going, and then, well, how do you get there?
• 20:21
  That's that nuts and bolts skills building that we talked about.
• 20:24
  Again, always a part of a coaching engagement, never the most important part.
• 20:29
  The next step is, well, what's.
• 20:30
  What are the obstacles?
• 20:31
  What's in the way?
• 20:33
  And that's often in terms of resource constraints, not enough time, not enough money, relationships, stuff like that.
• 20:39
  And if you know who you are, if you know where you're going, if you know how to get there, if you removed all the obstacles in front of you and you're still not living the life that you're working
• 20:48
  so hard for, well then the obstacles inside of you, it's between your ears.
• 20:53
  And my job is to ask questions to find out where in this journey we are, where to focus on.
• 21:00
  And yeah, I'd be happy to tell you some stories about different, different parts of that.
• 21:08
  Okay.
• 21:08
  Yeah, so I mean that's interesting too because clearly this is a channel for entrepreneurs and so many people are smart, hard working, successful, they've built, you know, companies and incredible success stories there.
• 21:23
  But inevitably, just like anyone else, there's challenges to where could be a health challenge, could be relationship, could be a lack of fulfillment.
• 21:31
  So I mean, yeah, I'd love to hear some stories about, you know, how, you know, obviously you don't have to give names or anything, but just, just some, some, you know, what, what you've done for people and, and
• 21:42
  how that's worked out for them.
• 21:43
  Sure.
• 21:44
  So I'll tell you one of my favorite stories and any client stories that I share, the client always gives permission for me to share this, although sometimes the names are changed.
• 21:52
  But I'll tell you a story that encapsulates pretty much everything I do that answers this question.
• 21:57
  So a few years ago I was working with a woman, she was about 50, about 50 years old.
• 22:02
  She was a serial entrepreneur.
• 22:04
  She had reached a certain level of success.
• 22:06
  She had 15, 16 employees, something like that.
• 22:10
  And her business was a prison.
• 22:13
  She was working 15, 16 hour days, never took a day off.
• 22:18
  Nothing could happen in this woman's business without her micro involvement.
• 22:22
  And she hired me as a business coach because she wanted the how, just tell me what do I need to do.
• 22:29
  And I taught her the standard things.
• 22:31
  Daily huddles, quarterly she planning meetings, weekly management accountability meetings to get everyone rowing in the same direction.
• 22:38
  And you know that you don't have to have the same meeting five times, just have it once a day.
• 22:43
  We talked about she already had a great company culture, you know, she already had values, she already had purpose and stuff like that.
• 22:50
  We talked about five dysfunctions of a team and why teams don't work.
• 22:55
  That you know, there's.
• 22:57
  Because they don't trust each other, they don't engage in constructive conflict.
• 23:00
  Because they don't engage in constructive conflict.
• 23:03
  No one commits to the company goals.
• 23:06
  Because no one commits to the company goals, you can't hold anyone accountable, accountable to it.
• 23:10
  And because you can't hold anyone accountable to it, you know, results suffer.
• 23:13
  We talked about all these basic things and she had some progress in her business, but it always seemed like it was one step forward, one step back.
• 23:23
  After a couple months, I realized that her problem wasn't that she didn't know enough stuff.
• 23:28
  Like she knew what she needed to do and she was a hard working person.
• 23:33
  The problem was between her ears.
• 23:35
  It wasn't that she was just, you know, read this one book and then she'll figure it out.
• 23:38
  Or I'll just tell her this brilliant thing and then she'll figure it out.
• 23:42
  So we did something called a competing commitment exercise.
• 23:45
  And it started with a conscious commitment.
• 23:48
  They have.
• 23:48
  Our conscious minds are like an ant riding the elephant of our subconscious.
• 23:53
  The ant cannot control the elephant through force of will.
• 23:56
  It's impossible.
• 23:57
  The most the elephant can.
• 23:59
  So the most the ant can do is say, hey, look over there and hope that the elephant turns his head and sees something.
• 24:06
  So he started with her conscious commitment, and she was committed to growing her business without her micromanagement.
• 24:13
  Okay, that sounds good.
• 24:16
  Next question.
• 24:17
  What are all the behaviors, what are all the things that she does that are at cross purposes with her conscious commitment?
• 24:24
  Well, she doesn't pay a market wage, so she's not able to attract eight players.
• 24:30
  She loves this, were her words.
• 24:32
  Birds with broken wings.
• 24:34
  You know, people who she just knows, you know, could be successful if only they had, you know, a little bit of help.
• 24:40
  People would bring work to her and it wouldn't be what she wanted.
• 24:42
  And she would, instead of training them, instead of teaching them, she would just do it herself, basically diminishing the creative capacity of everyone.
• 24:52
  Her staff made a list of 10 or 15 things.
• 24:56
  Next question.
• 24:57
  Someone who does those things, what else might they be committed to?
• 25:02
  Subconscious self protective.
• 25:04
  That makes all of those sabotaging behaviors seem perfectly reasonable.
• 25:11
  And she realized that she was committed to not depending on anyone.
• 25:17
  Now it makes perfect sense.
• 25:18
  If you're committed to not depending on anyone, of course you hire people you can't depend on.
• 25:24
  Next question.
• 25:25
  Someone who's committed to that.
• 25:27
  What is a belief that they have about the world, an assumption just about themselves or other people or the way the world works that fuels that competing commitment that makes it a matter of life or death.
• 25:38
  She realized she was committed to not depending on anyone because if she did, they would let her down, betray her, and she'd feel terrible about herself.
• 25:48
  Now when she was 8 years old, that was a perfectly accurate worldview.
• 25:51
  That's exactly the environment that she grew up in.
• 25:53
  But as a 50 year old successful entrepreneur, it was absurd.
• 25:57
  But the elephant of our subconscious is not enough to say, oh that's dumb, just stop doing that.
• 26:02
  We need to get the elephant to turn its head.
• 26:04
  And how do we do that?
• 26:05
  We do a series of tests of the validity of the belief.
• 26:10
  Starting with very low risk tests that if it's blows up in your face, it doesn't matter.
• 26:15
  So I said depend on people.
• 26:18
  Ask your assistant to order lunch for you and not tell you what it is.
• 26:22
  Depend on her to get you a good lunch.
• 26:24
  Worst thing that happens is you just, you know, don't eat lunch that day or you go out and get a bagel, ask your husband to take out the garbage.
• 26:31
  You know, worse that happens is you have to do it yourself later.
• 26:33
  She these low risk tests of the validity of the belief and over the course of a month or two she took higher stakes, higher stakes tests of this belief and it started to loosen its grip on her.
• 26:46
  And as she, as the belief lost its power, there was no reason to engage in all of those self sabotaging behaviors.
• 26:58
  Dave, I'm happy to report two months later, this woman who worked 15, 16 hour days, she took a two month sabatical, she walked away from her company, she biked across Canada and when she came back, everything was working
• 27:14
  because once she was free of herself, she was able to actually fix, able to actually do all the things that she learned over the past 20 years.
• 27:22
  That makes sense.
• 27:23
  Yeah.
• 27:24
  Yeah, that's impressive.
• 27:26
  All right, so Jonathan, if people want to learn more about untangled coaching and you know, if they have similar issues or a problem that they, they want someone to help them with, what's the best way that people can
• 27:40
  reach out to you?
• 27:41
  Best way to get in touch with me is Jonathan Domsky on LinkedIn or go to my website untangled-coaching.com don't forget the dash and you could contact me from there if you'd like to engage with me.
• 27:57
  There are several ways.
• 27:58
  One on one executive coaching.
• 28:00
  I also have video courses on most of the things that I teach so you could do it more economically.
• 28:07
  And one on one you can find that on my website.
• 28:10
  And this September I am launching my group coaching program.
• 28:15
  It's a year long mastermind for people who are, have reached a certain level of success but they are ready to discover what they were born for and how to make that happen.
• 28:26
  In their life and business.
• 28:29
  All right.
• 28:29
  And we'll link all that in the show notes for everyone as well.
• 28:33
  All right.
• 28:33
  Well, Jonathan, thank you so much for taking the time to be here and sharing all this, this valuable wisdom from your journey with our listeners.
• 28:39
  We greatly appreciate it.
• 28:41
  It's been a delay.
• 28:41
  I hope it's been helpful.
• 28:42
  Dave.
• 28:43
  All right.
• 28:44
  And that's all the time we have for now.
• 28:45
  We will see you next time.
• 28:51
  Sam.