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Transcript

If I Were the Devil by Paul Harvey - Original 1965 Broadcast · Gil I Am

• 0:03
  Speaker 1: If I were the devil. If I were the devil,
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: if I were the Prince of darkness, I'd want to
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: engulf the whole world in darkness, and i'd have a
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: third of its real estate and four fifths of its population.
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: But I wouldn't be happy until I had seized the
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: ripest apple on the tree the So I'd set about,
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: however necessary to take over the United States. I'd subvert
• 0:29
  Speaker 1: the churches. First. I'd begin with a campaign of whispers.
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: With the wisdom of a serpent, I would whisper to
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: you as I whispered to Eve, do as you please.
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: To the young, I would whisper that the Bible is
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: a myth. I would convince them that man created God
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: instead of the other way around. I would confide that
• 0:45
  Speaker 1: what's bad is good, and what's good is square, and
• 0:49
  Speaker 1: the old I would teach to pray after me our father,
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: which aren't in Washington. And then I'd get organized. I'd
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: educate authors in how to make lowrid literature exciting, so
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: that anything else would appear dull and noninteresting. I'd threatened
• 1:05
  Speaker 1: TV with dirtier movies, and vice versa. I'd peddle narcotics
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: to whom I could, I'd sell alcohol to ladies and
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: gentlemen of distinction. I'd tranquilize the rest with pills. If
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: I were the Devil, I'd soon have families at war
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: with themselves, churches at war with themselves, and nations at
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: war with themselves until each in its turn was consumed,
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: and with promises of higher ratings. I'd have mesmerizing media
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: fanning the flames. If I were the Devil, I would
• 1:35
  Speaker 1: encourage schools to refine young intellects, but neglect to discipline emotions,
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: just let those run wild until before you knew it.
• 1:42
  Speaker 1: You'd have to have drug sniffing dogs and metal detectors
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: at every schoolhouse door. Within a decade, i'd have prisons overflowing.
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: I'd have judges promoting pornography. Soon I could evict God
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: from the courthouse, then from the schoolhouse, and then from
• 1:59
  Speaker 1: the houses of common and in his own churches. I
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: would substitute psychology for religion and deify science. I would
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: lure priests and pastors into misusing boys and girls and
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: church money. If I were the Devil, I'd make the
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: symbol of Easter an egg, and the symbol of Christmas
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: a bottle. If I were the devil, I'd take from
• 2:18
  Speaker 1: those who have and give to those who wanted, until
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: I had killed the incentive of the ambitious. And what
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: will you bet? I couldn't get whole states to promote
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: gambling as the way to get rich. I would caution
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: against extremes in hard work, in patriotism, in moral conduct.
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: I would convince the young that marriage is old fashioned,
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: that swinging is more fun, that what you see on
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: TV is the way to be. And thus I could
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: undress you in public, and I could lure you into
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: bed with diseases for which there is no cure. In
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: other words, if I were the devil, I just keep
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: right on doing what he's doing.