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Transcript

7 Ways To Handle A Difficult Manager At Work – Gain A Strong Supporter Not A Headache · Enhance.training

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: Having a difficult manager at work can be really tough.
• 0:04
  SPEAKER_00: I mean people in other teams might be going home earlier, getting more time at lunch, being praised more, getting promoted quicker.
• 0:11
  SPEAKER_00: In short, they're having an easier time at work than you because you have a difficult boss.
• 0:17
  SPEAKER_00: Having a difficult manager at work can really take the fun out of being at work, it can hit your motivation and it can cause a lot of stress.
• 0:24
  SPEAKER_00: I mean after all, your manager and their good opinion of you has a big impact on the projects you get, the bonuses and promotion, not to mention your happiness at work.
• 0:34
  SPEAKER_00: The chances are high that you will encounter a difficult manager at some point in your career, and knowing how to handle a difficult manager at work can make the difference between you hating work and ultimately resigning from a good job, to you getting the absolute most out of the position and enjoying doing it.
• 0:53
  SPEAKER_00: I share seven ways to handle a difficult manager at work.
• 0:56
  SPEAKER_00: I go through each way in some detail so you can apply these approaches immediately with your difficult manager.
• 1:02
  SPEAKER_00: My name is Jess Coles and I've had a 25-year management career in corporates and household names through to SMEs.
• 1:09
  SPEAKER_00: And I've dealt with several difficult and demanding managers, and worse, during my career, and I'd like to share tried and tested ways to best deal with them.
• 1:18
  SPEAKER_00: If you're new to this podcast, Enhance.training shares business and people management expertise to help you improve your performance and that of your team and business.
• 1:28
  SPEAKER_00: During your career, you are likely to work with many different managers.
• 1:32
  SPEAKER_00: Some will be line managers and others more senior stakeholders, for instance.
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_00: Some you'll get on really well with, and others you'll find hard to get along with.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_00: Part of managing upwards effectively is learning how to handle difficult bosses at work as well as the managers that are much easier to work with, which is exactly what you'll learn in this video.
• 1:51
  SPEAKER_00: From personal experience, learning how to deal with a difficult manager at work can be a significant feather in your cap and can lead directly to promotion.
• 2:01
  SPEAKER_00: Senior management looks favourably on those able to successfully handle the many different types of people around them.
• 2:08
  SPEAKER_00: So before we dive into the detail, it is worth talking about what a difficult manager is compared to, say, a toxic manager at work.
• 2:16
  SPEAKER_00: A difficult manager may be demanding they set themselves and you high standards, which are really quite hard to achieve.
• 2:23
  SPEAKER_00: They might be overly direct, blunt, or even intimidating.
• 2:27
  SPEAKER_00: This can be tough to deal with for many people who are not used to blunt management styles.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_00: A difficult manager may criticize you a lot more than praise you, for instance, which can be really demoralizing even if they are trying to help.
• 2:39
  SPEAKER_00: A difficult boss with your interest at heart is very different from a toxic manager.
• 2:44
  SPEAKER_00: So let's go through seven ways to handle a difficult manager at work.
• 2:49
  SPEAKER_00: Try all these approaches with your difficult manager, starting with the ones that you think will work best.
• 2:54
  SPEAKER_00: You know your manager.
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_00: Doing nothing is the worst thing, particularly if you're unhappy or nervous about your current relationship with your manager.
• 3:03
  SPEAKER_00: Leaving a good job because of a difficult boss may help your happiness in the short term, but not necessarily your career.
• 3:10
  SPEAKER_00: Over the long term you will come across other difficult bosses, so it is best to learn how to handle them sooner rather than later.
• 3:17
  SPEAKER_00: So the first way to handle a difficult manager at work is to be super professional in how you act, your work ethic, and what you produce.
• 3:26
  SPEAKER_00: You know, if you're doing a good job and creating a lot of value, it is firstly much harder for the boss to criticize you, think negatively or be difficult because of performance reasons.
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_00: And second, colleagues and senior managers will notice, which will increase your standing within the business, which is only a good thing.
• 3:44
  SPEAKER_00: So do the best job you can.
• 3:46
  SPEAKER_00: If you are able to up your game, perfect.
• 3:49
  SPEAKER_00: Demanding managers can be impressed by this approach and can start treating you quite differently.
• 3:55
  SPEAKER_00: And as tempting as it is, don't talk negatively about your difficult boss to colleagues or others in the company.
• 4:02
  SPEAKER_00: Negative comments will get back to the manager eventually, which won't help your situation.
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_00: Try to keep your negative emotions in check.
• 4:11
  SPEAKER_00: Research has proven that you if you have a negative mindset, you will look for and remember the negative things that happen.
• 4:18
  SPEAKER_00: And of course, the opposite is also true.
• 4:20
  SPEAKER_00: So as you can imagine, you can create vicious or virtuous circles pretty quickly.
• 4:26
  SPEAKER_00: Keep a positive mindset.
• 4:28
  SPEAKER_00: There is a lot you can learn from working with a difficult manager.
• 4:32
  SPEAKER_00: So the second way to handle a difficult boss at work is to be proactive and take charge of your relationship with your manager.
• 4:40
  SPEAKER_00: By researching different ways to improve your relationships with your difficult manager, you are being proactive.
• 4:45
  SPEAKER_00: So well done for taking this first step.
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_00: Keep your positive mindset and translate your intentions into actions at work with your difficult manager.
• 4:54
  SPEAKER_00: Don't expect your manager to work on improving their relationship with you.
• 4:59
  SPEAKER_00: It is your job to flex how you interact and manage your side of the relationship.
• 5:03
  SPEAKER_00: Work out how they like to be managed.
• 5:06
  SPEAKER_00: Speak to other team members about what they have found works best.
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_00: Ask your manager directly.
• 5:11
  SPEAKER_00: For example, if they micromanage a bit too much, proactively give them more detail, more frequent updates, etc., not less.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_00: If they're hard to get hold of between 9am and 6pm, get into the office at 8am and ask for 10 minutes to chat.
• 5:26
  SPEAKER_00: And if you don't meet regularly, send them an email with what you've achieved during the week and the problems you're still working on.
• 5:32
  SPEAKER_00: Put in the effort and your difficult boss will notice.
• 5:35
  SPEAKER_00: And being proactive and taking charge of the relationship is only going to be positive for you in the eyes of the difficult manager.
• 5:43
  SPEAKER_00: The third way to handle a difficult manager at work is to find out what are your boss's preferences and play to these preferences.
• 5:52
  SPEAKER_00: Find out how your boss likes to manage their team.
• 5:55
  SPEAKER_00: Do they like to know exactly what's going on and have plenty of input into the direction of projects?
• 6:00
  SPEAKER_00: Or are they much more hands-off and only really want to know when something has been completed?
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_00: Figure out what their preferred working style is.
• 6:09
  SPEAKER_00: Do they like to book in weekly one-to-one meetings with you?
• 6:12
  SPEAKER_00: Or do they prefer to leave meetings very ad hoc?
• 6:15
  SPEAKER_00: Do they prefer that you send through email updates?
• 6:17
  SPEAKER_00: And how often do they want you communicating with them?
• 6:20
  SPEAKER_00: You know, each day or once a week or only when needed?
• 6:24
  SPEAKER_00: Ask them.
• 6:25
  SPEAKER_00: Try out different approaches and see which ones work the best.
• 6:29
  SPEAKER_00: Your manager is likely to be busy, so work out how you're going to get enough of their time and attention.
• 6:35
  SPEAKER_00: Play to what they prefer and like.
• 6:38
  SPEAKER_00: The fourth way to handle a difficult manager at work is to help them to success.
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_00: Find out what success means for your manager.
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_00: Are they asked for a promotion or to have a specific project completed or to look good in front of their bosses?
• 6:53
  SPEAKER_00: Find out how you can help your difficult manager achieve the success that they want.
• 6:59
  SPEAKER_00: Ask them if you're unsure.
• 7:01
  SPEAKER_00: I would be amazed if you can find a difficult manager that didn't appreciate their team members helping them to be successful.
• 7:08
  SPEAKER_00: And when your difficult manager has achieved success, praise them, compliment them, show your admiration without going overboard.
• 7:17
  SPEAKER_00: Everyone likes to celebrate personal successes, even if it's in a low-key way.
• 7:22
  SPEAKER_00: The fifth way to handle a difficult manager at work is to speak up about concerns and offer solutions if needed.
• 7:29
  SPEAKER_00: Your manager has invested time in you, and particularly if you are performing well, it's expensive and time consuming to replace you.
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_00: On top of this, your difficult manager needs to keep their manager happy, and removing good employees will raise plenty of questions for them.
• 7:46
  SPEAKER_00: For this reason, you have more leverage than you might think.
• 7:49
  SPEAKER_00: Professionally and calmly raise concerns about what you don't like and why.
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_00: See if they're willing to negotiate a compromise.
• 7:57
  SPEAKER_00: Offer options that you think will work for them and will be better for you.
• 8:02
  SPEAKER_00: And if your boss is a bully or actively puts you and other team members down, they may only respect those that stand up to them.
• 8:09
  SPEAKER_00: This is scary to do and takes a lot of confidence.
• 8:13
  SPEAKER_00: Speak to your manager face to face and in private.
• 8:16
  SPEAKER_00: If this doesn't make any difference, then find out if colleagues are willing to also have a private conversation with that manager.
• 8:23
  SPEAKER_00: Don't be afraid to bring up issues and do offer potential solutions to make it easier for your manager to agree to change.
• 8:31
  SPEAKER_00: The sixth way to handle a difficult manager at work is don't allow yourself to be intimidated.
• 8:37
  SPEAKER_00: And I know this is easier said than done.
• 8:39
  SPEAKER_00: Difficult managers and demanding managers can be intimidating because they are harder to deal with and appear less approachable.
• 8:47
  SPEAKER_00: You have a job to do, and working well with your manager will help you do a good job, which is in your interests and your managers.
• 8:55
  SPEAKER_00: Ask for clarifications, help, support, and anything else that you might need.
• 9:00
  SPEAKER_00: Don't allow yourself to be hindered because you think they are intimidating.
• 9:04
  SPEAKER_00: When we get to know a person, they are usually a lot less intimidating because the fears we have about them diminish.
• 9:11
  SPEAKER_00: So get to know your difficult boss, you know, ask them about their life outside work, what their hopes and ambitions are, what hobbies they have, etc.
• 9:19
  SPEAKER_00: And by asking questions, you are demonstrating your interest in them.
• 9:23
  SPEAKER_00: Nearly everyone likes those who are generally interested in them.
• 9:27
  SPEAKER_00: So do not let your fears about a difficult manager stop you interacting with them and doing a great job.
• 9:33
  SPEAKER_00: Do get to know them on a personal level as well.
• 9:37
  SPEAKER_00: The seventh way to handle a difficult manager at work is to be a problem solver.
• 9:42
  SPEAKER_00: As a manager, there is nothing worse than an employee pointing out all the problems and what went wrong and then not offering any solutions.
• 9:50
  SPEAKER_00: They are effectively saying to the manager, here are all the problems and it's your job to fix them.
• 9:55
  SPEAKER_00: This does little to help anyone and has plenty to annoy the manager.
• 10:00
  SPEAKER_00: Don't be this person.
• 10:02
  SPEAKER_00: Spotting problems is an important step.
• 10:04
  SPEAKER_00: Coming up with at least one sensible solution before discussing it with your manager keeps your manager on side.
• 10:10
  SPEAKER_00: You are then saying, Here is a problem I found, and my best solution is boom boom boom boom.
• 10:17
  SPEAKER_00: As a manager, this is great.
• 10:20
  SPEAKER_00: The team member has taken ownership and responsibility to come up with a solution.
• 10:24
  SPEAKER_00: Whether that proposed solution is the final one used or not doesn't really matter.
• 10:28
  SPEAKER_00: The manager has one less problem to deal with and a team member that is solving problems.
• 10:35
  SPEAKER_00: Be a problem solver.
• 10:36
  SPEAKER_00: Managers will love you, and yes, even the difficult ones will be grateful that you are on their team.
• 10:43
  SPEAKER_00: So, in summary, actively work at adapting your style of communication and working to best suit your difficult manager's approach.
• 10:50
  SPEAKER_00: There is a lot that you can do, and learning how to flex your style and approach is an invaluable set of skills to develop.
• 10:57
  SPEAKER_00: Don't procrastinate nor stick rigidly to the style you prefer, neither will help you.
• 11:03
  SPEAKER_00: Be proactive, professional and positive.
• 11:06
  SPEAKER_00: And if these changes don't work, professionally speak up about your concerns to your manager.
• 11:12
  SPEAKER_00: Learning how to handle difficult managers at work can turn difficult managers into strong supporters, which can be great for your career.
• 11:20
  SPEAKER_00: Do try different approaches and good luck in dealing with your difficult manager.
• 11:25
  SPEAKER_00: If you're new to this podcast, enhance.training shares business and people management expertise to help you improve your performance and that of your team and business.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_00: Thanks very much for listening, and I look forward to speaking to you again soon.