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Why We Cry: The Science and Meaning Behind Tears · The Infographics Show Podcast

• 0:10
  Speaker 1: Welcome to beyond infographics. Today we're diving deep into something well,
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  Speaker 1: pretty universal, but maybe something we don't think about too much. Tears.
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  Speaker 1: We're really going beyond the surface level today. We want
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  Speaker 1: to explore what they're actually made of, why we produce them,
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  Speaker 1: and you know, what they might tell us about ourselves,
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  Speaker 1: our biology, our feelings, even how we connect with others.
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  Speaker 2: It's surprisingly complex stuff.
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  Speaker 1: Exactly, So forget the simple diagrams. Think of this as
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  Speaker 1: a journey through the science, the emotion, even the culture
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  Speaker 1: around crying. We've gathered some fascinating insights.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, there are definitely some surprises in there.
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  Speaker 1: Get ready for some aha moments, hopefully as we unpack
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  Speaker 1: this seemingly simple thing.
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  Speaker 2: Okay, so where do we start composition?
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  Speaker 1: Maybe, yeah, let's do that, because when you think tears,
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  Speaker 1: you just think salty water.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, but it's actually way more than that. Tears are
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  Speaker 2: quite a sophisticated fluid. They've got electrolytes, of course, but
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  Speaker 2: also different proteins lipids. Those are fats and musins, musins
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  Speaker 2: like nucut sort of. Yeah, it all comes together to
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  Speaker 2: form these really important layers on the surface of your eye.
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  Speaker 2: It's not just a drop of water.
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  Speaker 1: It's structured layers, okay, and these layers do different things exactly.
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  Speaker 2: They keep the eye healthy, lubricated, protected. It's a pretty
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  Speaker 2: complex system.
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  Speaker 1: Right, And I think you mentioned before we started there
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  Speaker 1: isn't just one kind of tear.
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  Speaker 2: No, that's one of the really fascinating parts. We actually
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  Speaker 2: make three different types, basil reflex and emotional tears.
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  Speaker 1: Basil reflex, emotional.
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  Speaker 2: And the amazing thing is they're chemical makeup. It's slightly
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  Speaker 2: different for each one. It's like they're tailored for the
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  Speaker 2: job they need to do.
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  Speaker 1: Okay, let's break those down. Basil tears, what are they for?
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  Speaker 2: Basil tears are your everyday tears. Your eyes are producing
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  Speaker 2: them constantly all day long.
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  Speaker 1: You don't even notice them, right.
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  Speaker 2: They're there to lubricate and nourish the cornea, the front
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  Speaker 2: part of your eye. Think of them like like constant maintenance,
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  Speaker 2: keeping everything smooth and clear, washing away tiny bits of dust.
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  Speaker 1: So they're the baseline. What's in them? Is it just
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  Speaker 1: the water and electrolytes.
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  Speaker 2: Well, water and electrolytes are key, but also that muse
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  Speaker 2: and we mentioned for even spreading lipids to stop them
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  Speaker 2: evaporating too. Quickly, and importantly, stuff like lysizyme and.
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  Speaker 1: Lactoferrin, which sound like defenders.
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  Speaker 2: They are. They're antibacterial proteins helping to fight off potential infections.
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  Speaker 2: There's also glucose urea, sodium potassium. It's a whole cocktail
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  Speaker 2: keeping your eye healthy.
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  Speaker 1: Wow, okay, so they're the quiet protectors. Yeah, then reflex tears.
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  Speaker 1: I think I know these ones.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, you definitely do. These are the ones that gush
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  Speaker 2: out when something irritates your eye.
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  Speaker 1: Chopping onions that's a classic one, or getting dust in
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  Speaker 1: your eye.
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  Speaker 2: Exactly, or smoke, strong perfumes, even tear gas. Unfortunately, it's
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  Speaker 2: your eye's emergency flush system.
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  Speaker 1: How does that get triggered?
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  Speaker 2: There are these tiny sensors TRP channels in the ophthalmic nerve,
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  Speaker 2: the nerve for your eye. Irritants activate them and boom.
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  Speaker 2: The tear ducts open the floodgates.
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  Speaker 1: And is the recipe different from basal tears.
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  Speaker 2: It's similar, but the volume is much higher obviously, and
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  Speaker 2: they tend to have higher levels of certain proteins like
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  Speaker 2: tear lipicalin maybe to help deal with the irritant. The
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  Speaker 2: main job is just washing things out fast, makes sense.
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  Speaker 1: Lubrication, defense, emergency flesh. So that leads emotional tears the
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  Speaker 1: ones we usually mean when we talk about.
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  Speaker 2: Crying, right, The tears linked to strong feelings stress, sadness, grief,
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  Speaker 2: even intense joy or relief, sometimes anger or frustration.
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  Speaker 1: And these are chemically different.
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  Speaker 2: Again, Yes, and this is where it gets really intriguing.
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  Speaker 2: From a biological standpoint, emotional tears have been found to
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  Speaker 2: contain higher concentrations of certain things compared to basal or
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  Speaker 2: reflex tears likewise. Well, for one, protein based hormones, things
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  Speaker 2: like prolactin and adrenocordicotropic hormone ACTCH, which is a stress hormone.
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  Speaker 1: So crying might literally be releasing stress hormones from your body.
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  Speaker 2: That's one of the leading theories. Yeah, and get this,
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  Speaker 2: They also contain higher levels of lucine and kephalin, which
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  Speaker 2: is it's an endorphin, a natural painkiller produced by the body.
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  Speaker 1: Wow, So emotional tears carry stress signals and potentially a
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  Speaker 1: natural soother.
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  Speaker 2: It strongly suggests a role in emotional regulation, in helping
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  Speaker 2: the body kind of rebalance itself after a strong emotional surge.
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  Speaker 2: It's not just symbolic. There's biochemistry happening.
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  Speaker 1: That's fascinating. And you mentioned neurotransmitters too, Yeah.
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  Speaker 2: Things like acetylcholine, adrenaline, neu adrenaline there and there too.
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  Speaker 2: Linking the tears directly to the autonomic nervous system, which
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  Speaker 2: controls our fight or flight responses and other automatic emmertional reactions.
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  Speaker 1: It's like our body is trying to physically wash away
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  Speaker 1: the stress, or at least signal that it's happening. This
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  Speaker 1: leads to the big question, then, why do we try emotionally?
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  Speaker 1: It's not always obvious. You mentioned even happy news can
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  Speaker 1: do it.
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  Speaker 2: That's right. It brings us into the realm of evolutionary
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  Speaker 2: psychol One really compelling idea is that emotional crying is
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  Speaker 2: linked to a feeling of perceived helplessness.
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  Speaker 1: Helplessness even when you're happy.
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  Speaker 2: Think about overwhelming joy like winning the lottery or seeing
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  Speaker 2: a loved one after years, there can be this underlying
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  Speaker 2: sense of this is too big. I can't quite process it.
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  Speaker 2: I'm overwhelmed, a sort of temporary helplessness in the face
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  Speaker 2: of massive emotion.
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  Speaker 1: Okay, I can see that it's not just about negative
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  Speaker 1: feelings exactly.
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  Speaker 2: And then there's the evolutionary signaling aspect. Consider what crying
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  Speaker 2: does physically. It blurs your vision.
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  Speaker 1: Right, makes it hard to see, hard to fight or
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  Speaker 1: run precisely.
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  Speaker 2: So one theory is that by handicapping you slightly blurring
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  Speaker 2: your vision, crying evolved as a signal. It could signal
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  Speaker 2: appeasement like I'm not a threat, I'm vulnerable.
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  Speaker 1: Ah okay, a way to de escalate potential conflict in
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  Speaker 1: early human groups.
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  Speaker 2: Potentially, Yes, Or it could signal a need for help,
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  Speaker 2: for comfort, for attachment. It's a very visible sign of vulnerability.
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  Speaker 1: So it's so elicit sympathy and aid from others.
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  Speaker 2: That's a major part of it. Yes, it's a powerful
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  Speaker 2: social signal that can strengthen bonds and indicate shared emotional states. Atachments,
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  Speaker 2: it says I need support or I share your feeling.
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  Speaker 1: That makes a lot of sense, and its social species
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  Speaker 1: like ours. Now, how does this change as we grow up?
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  Speaker 1: Do babies cry for the same reasons adults do? Well?
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  Speaker 2: Babies cry primarily to signal basic needs hunger, discomfort, pain, meeting, closeness.
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  Speaker 2: The frequency of crying actually tends to decrease as we
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  Speaker 2: get older, peaking in infancy and then dropping off until adolescence.
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  Speaker 1: Okay, so we cry less often overall as.
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  Speaker 2: Adults generally, Yes, But interestingly, the meaningly attached to tears
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  Speaker 2: compared to just say, shouting or vocal sounds, seems to
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  Speaker 2: become more significant as we age, especially for conveying deep emotion.
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  Speaker 1: A single tear can say a lot more for an.
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  Speaker 2: Adult exactly, and the triggers change too. Physical pain is
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  Speaker 2: a huge trigger for kids.
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  Speaker 1: Right, definitely, scrape knees, bumps, that sort of thing.
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  Speaker 2: But for adults, while pain can still make us cry,
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  Speaker 2: it's often less likely to trigger those deep emotional tears
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  Speaker 2: compared to say, feelings of loss, grief, or powerlessness. Those
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  Speaker 2: remain powerful triggers throughout life.
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  Speaker 1: And what about empathy? When do we start crying for others?
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  Speaker 2: Ah? That's a crucial development. As kids develop empathy the
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  Speaker 2: ability to understand and share the feelings of another and
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  Speaker 2: what psychologists call theory of mind.
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  Speaker 1: Understanding that other people have their own thoughts and feelings.
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  Speaker 2: Right, as those abilities develop, we start to cry not
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  Speaker 2: just for our own pain or frustration, but when we
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  Speaker 2: see or understand someone else's suffering. It moves beyond purely
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  Speaker 2: egocentric reasons.
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  Speaker 1: A big step in social emotional development. Now, let's talk
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  Speaker 1: about something many people notice differences between individuals and maybe
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  Speaker 1: between genders, in crying. Is it true that women cry
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  Speaker 1: more than men?
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  Speaker 2: The data, especially from Western cultures, generally shows that adult
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  Speaker 2: women report crying more often than adult men report.
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  Speaker 1: So maybe there's a reporting bias.
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  Speaker 2: That's always a possibility in self reported studies. Yeah, but
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  Speaker 2: the consistency across studies suggests there probably is a difference
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  Speaker 2: in frequency on average. However, the reasons can be different too,
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  Speaker 2: which is important. Ye. Also, some research suggests women may
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  Speaker 2: cry more often in situations involving conflict or perceived criticism,
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  Speaker 2: while men might report crying relatively more often in response
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  Speaker 2: to positive events like triumphs or moments of connection, or
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  Speaker 2: sometimes related to loss.
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  Speaker 1: Oh. Interesting, So it's not just about.
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  Speaker 2: Sadness, not entirely, And when it comes to really profound
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  Speaker 2: experiences like bereavement or relationship breakups, those big losses, the
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  Speaker 2: gender differences in crying frequency tend to be much smaller.
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  Speaker 1: So deep grief hits everyone similarly.
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  Speaker 2: It seems. So it highlights that it's really complex. It's
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  Speaker 2: not just biology, it's personality, culture, how we're raised.
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  Speaker 1: What other factors influence how much someone cries?
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  Speaker 2: Oh, quite a few. Personality is a big one. People
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  Speaker 2: hire in neuroticism or hire in empathy tend to cry
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  Speaker 2: more often.
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  Speaker 1: That makes sense.
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  Speaker 2: Attachment style matters too. People with a more dismissive attachment
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  Speaker 2: style who tend to downplay emotions and relationships often report
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  Speaker 2: crying less. Then there's mental health status depression or anxiety
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  Speaker 2: can affect crying patterns. Culture plays a massive role in
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  Speaker 2: how acceptable crying is, especially for men. Socialization, what we
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  Speaker 2: learn about expressing emotions as kids, are current relationships, past trauma.
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  Speaker 1: It's a huge web of influences.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, and even temporary things being sleep deprived, feeling stressed
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  Speaker 2: under the weather, all that can lower your threshold for tears.
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  Speaker 2: There's also some thought that hormonal differences like testosterone levels
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  Speaker 2: in men might contribute to a higher crying threshold biologically.
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  Speaker 1: So biology and environment are constantly interacting.
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  Speaker 2: Absolutely and learned control is huge. We learn consciously or unconsciously,
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  Speaker 2: when and where it's okay to cry.
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  Speaker 1: Speaking of cultural expectations, especially around men crying. That poetry
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  Speaker 1: collection you mentioned A Boy's Tears on Earth's Tongue, hmm,
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  Speaker 1: it sounds like it tackles this head on.
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  Speaker 2: It really does. The review highlights how the poems explore
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  Speaker 2: the frigility and a mo emotional depth of boyhood that
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  Speaker 2: society often doesn't want to acknowledge.
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  Speaker 1: That title alone is quite evocative, a boy's tears on
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  Speaker 1: Earth's tongue, like they're lost or absorbed without notice exactly.
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  Speaker 2: It challenges those stereotypes that demand boys be stoic, tough,
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  Speaker 2: suppress everything. The review talks about boys being cast as
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  Speaker 2: muted actors in their own emotional.
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  Speaker 1: Lives, forbidden from showing vulnerability.
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  Speaker 2: Right, and the poet questions all that. Looking at coming
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  Speaker 2: of age individuality, the review mentions this beautiful phrase, the
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  Speaker 2: inequality of the fingers, meaning how unique everyone is.
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  Speaker 1: So the poems try to give voice to those suppressed feelings.
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  Speaker 2: That's the aim, yes to make the world pay attention
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  Speaker 2: to the inner lives, the sorrows and experiences of the
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  Speaker 2: boy child. As the reviewer puts it, it defines the
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  Speaker 2: taste of tears on the lips of sorrow. It's powerful
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  Speaker 2: stuff about the pressure not to cry.
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  Speaker 1: It sounds incredibly moving, and it connects to this wider
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  Speaker 1: idea about how we perceive crying in society, is it
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  Speaker 1: always seen negatively? What about say, crying during a sad movie.
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  Speaker 2: That's an interesting one. Some people feel embarrassed, but there's
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  Speaker 2: an argument that letting yourself cry during a movie or
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  Speaker 2: reading a sad book can actually be well kind of
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  Speaker 2: healthy healthy. The idea is it helps keep your emotional
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  Speaker 2: circuits active and responsive, like a safe way to exercise
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  Speaker 2: empathy and process feelings without real world consequences. It might
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  Speaker 2: even make you more attune to your own emotions in daily.
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  Speaker 1: Life, like emotional flexibility training something like that.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, and just showing emotion, even in that context, can
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  Speaker 2: sometimes feel like a small act of pushing back against
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  Speaker 2: rigid expectations, especially around gender.
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  Speaker 1: That's a nice way to put it. What about in
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  Speaker 1: more serious settings like healthcare, how do doctors and nurses
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  Speaker 1: react to patients crying?
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  Speaker 2: Generally, studies suggest attitudes among medical professionals are thankfully pretty
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  Speaker 2: positive and supportive. They see it as a valid expression
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  Speaker 2: of distress or fear.
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  Speaker 1: That's good to hear.
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  Speaker 2: There can be some differences. Nurses, perhaps because of the
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  Speaker 2: nature of their role, sometimes report offering more physical comfort,
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  Speaker 2: like holding a hand makes sense. Interestingly, some studies found
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  Speaker 2: that medical students might be slightly less supportive initially than
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  Speaker 2: more experienced professionals. Maybe that empathy and comfort level develops
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  Speaker 2: more with time and practice.
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  Speaker 1: Experience probably makes a difference in knowing how to respond effectively.
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  Speaker 2: It likely does, And of course context is everything. How
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  Speaker 2: people react to tears depends hugely on who is crying,
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  Speaker 2: why they're crying, who's watching, and whether the tears seem
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  Speaker 2: appropriate for the situation.
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  Speaker 1: It's not as simple thumbs up or thumbs.
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  Speaker 2: Down, not at all, and perceptions are changing. We are
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  Speaker 2: seeing more public figures men included politicians, athletes crying in
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  Speaker 2: the media. That visibility might be slowly shifting norms around
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  Speaker 2: male emotional expression.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, maybe making it slightly more acceptable. Now you mentioned
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  Speaker 1: another perspective, more philosophical one from Jacques Derrida about the
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  Speaker 1: taste of tears.
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  Speaker 2: Yes, it's from an essay where he reflects on losing
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  Speaker 2: a close friend. It's a really profound take. He connects
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  Speaker 2: the very act of having a friend with the knowledge
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  Speaker 2: that loss and therefore tears are almost inevitable.
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  Speaker 1: Wow, so friendship itself contains the seed of future tears.
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  Speaker 2: That's the implication. To have a friend is to know
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  Speaker 2: somewhere deep down that one of you will likely mourn
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  Speaker 2: the other. Crying for Dereta is linked to this active
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  Speaker 2: memory of still seeing or feeling the presence of someone
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  Speaker 2: who isn't there anymore.
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  Speaker 1: That's incredibly poignant.
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  Speaker 2: He also talks about this idea of not really tasting
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  Speaker 2: your own tear. It's a subtle point, but it suggests
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  Speaker 2: the focus shouldn't be on your own feeling of sadness,
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  Speaker 2: like self pity, but on the other person, the one
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  Speaker 2: who is lost.
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  Speaker 1: So the tear originates from your connection to.
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  Speaker 2: Them, exactly, the connection to the other, the friend, the
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  Speaker 2: living being, that's the source. He argues that morning is necessary,
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  Speaker 2: it's human, but we shouldn't develop a taste for mourning,
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  Speaker 2: meaning we shouldn't linger in or almost cultivate sorrow for
• 13:56
  Speaker 2: its own sake.
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  Speaker 1: Navigate grief through the connection, not getting lost in the
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  Speaker 1: grief itself.
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  Speaker 2: Precisely, every tier in this view is fundamentally about that
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  Speaker 2: relationship that bond with another, that really.
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  Speaker 1: Has another layer entirely. It takes us from biochemistry right
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  Speaker 1: through to philosophy. So as we start to wrap up
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  Speaker 1: this deep ties, it's clear that tears are so much
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  Speaker 1: more than just water leaking from our eyes.
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  Speaker 2: Absolutely, we've seen this incredible interplay of biology, psychology, evolution,
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  Speaker 2: social dynamics, culture, even.
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  Speaker 1: Philosophy, from the specific hormones and emotional tears to the
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  Speaker 1: way society shapes our responses. There's just so much to
• 14:35
  Speaker 1: learn by paying attention to crying. If you listening found
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: this exploration thought provoking, maybe consider giving Beyond Infographics a
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: five star rating. It genuinely helps other people find these conversations.
• 14:47
  Speaker 2: Yeah, really does. And remember you can always check out
• 14:50
  Speaker 2: our website for more information on this topic and others
• 14:52
  Speaker 2: we've explored. The link is right there in the description.
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  Speaker 1: We really encourage you to think about your own experiences
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  Speaker 1: with tears through some of these lenses we've disc us today.
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  Speaker 1: What part of this stood out most to you.
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  Speaker 2: It's definitely something to ponder.
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  Speaker 1: And maybe here's a final thought to leave you with.
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  Speaker 1: If tears really do carry these biochemical traces of our emotions,
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  Speaker 1: our stress, our connections, what untold stories might each single
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  Speaker 1: tear drop hold a powerful thought, something to think about
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  Speaker 1: until our next deep dive