Latest / The Driven Athlete / Olympic Skier Alice Merryweather on Training, Mental Resilience, & Eating Disorders | Ep 42

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Olympic Skier Alice Merryweather on Training, Mental Resilience, & Eating Disorders | Ep 42 · The Driven Athlete

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: If you're a driven, active person who wants to reach and pursue a higher quality life with some ambition, then guess what this podcast is for you.
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: This is the Driven Athlete Podcast.
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: What's up?
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: Y'all?
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: It's your man, dr Kyle.
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: Welcome back to the Driven Athlete Podcast.
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: We've got a really cool guest with us, alice Merriweather, olympic skier.
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: She's a legend Currently up in Salt Lake City, utah Right Cool.
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: Well, thanks for coming on.
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: I appreciate you taking the time out of your busy schedule to jump on board and bring some encouragement and enlightenment to people.
• 0:33
  Speaker 2: Thank you so much for having me.
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: So you're in Salt Lake City, utah right Is that where you train mostly?
• 0:40
  Speaker 2: Yes, so I actually just retired two, two months ago.
• 0:44
  Speaker 2: Officially, okay, but I'm still based out here because this is where I've spent the last like eight years of my life uh, in the summers and in the off season, because our usb team headquarters are up in park city, utah cool, that makes total sense and it's gorgeous up there oh yeah, I have a buddy that he, he's all he's.
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: I mean he's mid-30s and he like he's already a snowbird, he like goes up to Utah and then comes back to South Florida and the seasons and I'm like that's, it's wise and smart.
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: He's like hiking and all up in there, it's awesome.
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: Um, so, yeah, okay.
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: So let's talk about the last eight years.
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: Well, I mean well, what led you um in in your journey?
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: Um, skiing, what had you?
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: Has that always been your thing?
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: Like, does that your go-to activity when we were growing up and stuff?
• 1:27
  Speaker 2: So I grew up South of Boston not a lot of mountains around there, but both my parents were passionate recreational skiers.
• 1:35
  Speaker 2: Neither of them were racers themselves, um and so when I was little they would bring my older brother and me up to New Hampshire, take us skiing on weekends, and both my brother and I just fell in love with it right away.
• 1:48
  Speaker 2: So they ended up signing us up for the race team at one of the mountains out of tash, and we stayed with it for seven years throughout the whole like kids program at out of tash, uh, and I kind of just kept getting better and better throughout my time doing that.
• 2:06
  Speaker 2: So when I was in eighth grade, it was my last year of racing with the out of Tash club and my parents and I kind of sat down and had a serious conversation of like do you want to dedicate yourself to this Cause?
• 2:19
  Speaker 2: There are high schools that are specifically designed for ski racers and winter sports and if you're serious about this, then you know we'll talk about having you go to one of those.
• 2:29
  Speaker 2: And I said, yeah, I think I want to keep doing this and I want to apply myself to this as much as I can, and and from there on.
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: I ended up going to one of those ski academies uh Stratton mountain school, and dedicated myself even more.
• 2:44
  Speaker 2: It's a very unique kind of high school experience for sure, I totally yeah, and that's.
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: I feel like it's a young age.
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: So eighth grade was a turning point.
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: I feel like it's a young age to like what intense direction are we going?
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: You know like full, full send, okay, how'd you?
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: I mean, you went, what'd you?
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: What'd you been 13 or 14 years old at that point?
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: How did you feel about that?
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: Were you like yep, this is it, this is exactly what I want to do?
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: Or you're like well, like did you?
• 3:09
  Speaker 1: Were you on the fence?
• 3:12
  Speaker 2: I wasn't on the fence, that I wanted to try as hard as I could at skiing, but I also was never someone who I've always been afraid of setting goals or at least I was for a very long time.
• 3:24
  Speaker 2: And so in my mind I loved skiing and still do today.
• 3:29
  Speaker 2: But I thought, okay, I love this thing and I have this opportunity where I'm actually pretty good at this sport and the more I apply myself to it, the better I keep getting.
• 3:40
  Speaker 2: And so if I have this chance to apply myself to it at a really high level at such a young age, then I'm absolutely going to take that and see how far I can go.
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and it's interesting.
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: Like the I mean that whole concept I'm doing pretty good.
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: If I like dive all in and put more effort on this, I might see even better results with.
• 4:00
  Speaker 1: I know for me personally, like whenever I do, that it's totally true Like the best way is just to like 100% full commit and laser focus on like one thing when I definitely see a lot of people, including myself, like dabbling in too many things and having one foot in, one foot out on the fence, and then it's like, well, I'm not getting the results.
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: I'm waiting for whatever seems to catch the most, but like not actually committing to one thing.
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: You know, anyway, that makes total sense.
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: But like not actually committing to one thing, you know, um, yeah, anyway, that makes total sense.
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: So was there anything else then, um, that you were maybe dabbling in of?
• 4:31
  Speaker 1: Like well, I could go skiing or anything else, direction wise, like commitment.
• 4:39
  Speaker 2: Oh, I mean, I was playing a lot of sports like all through middle school and soccer was kind of my other main sport that I love, and so I played on like our town team and the local club team, but skiing was definitely where I was performing the best and what I I loved the most, so it made total sense for me to pursue that more Totally Um, and then good decision, obviously that's really cool.
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: Um, so with uh, at what?
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: Eighth grade was a turning point?
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: What age do you feel like you were your pain.
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: You and your parents were like you're pretty good, Like you're just consistently doing well and out competing everybody else.
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: When did you notice that?
• 5:12
  Speaker 2: Um, it kind of ebbed and flowed honestly through, even when I was like nine, 10, 11, 12, I had good years, I had bad years, but on those good years, I you know, there were times where I wasn't losing many races and we all would kind of look at each other like, wow, this is, you're actually pretty fast.
• 5:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 5:36
  Speaker 2: And and I think it was in high school when it really started taking off during my junior year of high school, I qualified for world junior championships uh, over in Slovakia, wow.
• 5:48
  Speaker 2: And so that was that was a big moment for my family and I, where we we realized like, oh, okay, like this is going to the international level now.
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 5:58
  Speaker 2: It's really getting serious.
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: So, and that was a junior, so junior high school world junior championships in Slovakia.
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: So you all traveled.
• 6:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah, we went all the way over there.
• 6:08
  Speaker 2: My parents came, which was really special Um and I actually ended up third in the U18 category in one event in the Alpine combined Um, so got to be on the podium in one of the events and then three years later at my last world junior championships.
• 6:27
  Speaker 2: So I went to 2014, 15, 16, 17 um and in 2017.
• 6:33
  Speaker 2: Then I won the downhill at world junior championships wow in sweden that year and that was kind of like the main crux of my career.
• 6:43
  Speaker 2: That kind of drove me towards being more of a speed skier.
• 6:47
  Speaker 2: So downhill and super G events.
• 6:48
  Speaker 2: I think winning that downhill event showed the US ski team at that point like, oh okay, she's going to be a downhiller, she's a speed skier.
• 6:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so that was like where you niched into, like this is my thing, my event Interesting.
• 7:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so doing really well I'm going to ask more about that in a sec the um, like niching down but doing really well.
• 7:11
  Speaker 1: When you were young and through middle school and then high school committed, uh, more flight to direction.
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: What do you do you attribute anything with, like your parents or coaches or training or mentors?
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: It's like, what do you attribute that early success as a kid?
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: Because it's harder for kids, you know be like hey, look, if you really apply, you know you gotta really train like this and like really focus, like you're taking it seriously, cause like sometimes parent heard a lot of stories, right, um, they're super intense.
• 7:33
  Speaker 1: You know what I mean.
• 7:34
  Speaker 1: But anyway, what do you?
• 7:35
  Speaker 1: What do you attribute that success to for you?
• 7:38
  Speaker 2: I honestly attribute it all to my family.
• 7:40
  Speaker 2: My parents were not crazy intense.
• 7:43
  Speaker 2: They just encouraged me to try my hardest at whichever sport I did.
• 7:49
  Speaker 2: They encouraged me to be active and do a lot of outdoor activities and I think the fact that they didn't pressure me, they just encouraged, like I was going to, you know, be spending their money doing ski racing or whatever sport it was that I try my hardest.
• 8:08
  Speaker 2: And and when they saw success and I saw success, I think it just made it feel like a team effort and and knowing that they supported me without, you know, guiding every step that I took, they, they gave me the space to figure it out on my own.
• 8:24
  Speaker 2: And then also my older brother absolutely shaped who I am.
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: I mean, I I just wanted to be as good as him at everything we did together.
• 8:35
  Speaker 1: So so a little sibling competitiveness chase him down the mountain.
• 8:38
  Speaker 2: and in school he was always getting amazing grades.
• 8:41
  Speaker 2: So I wanted to also be really smart, and I think that just drove me to always challenge myself.
• 8:44
  Speaker 2: Because I wanted to also be really smart, and I think that just drove me to always challenge myself because I wanted to be able to compete with him.
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah.
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean a little sibling competitiveness.
• 8:51
  Speaker 1: Nothing wrong with that, you know, as long as it's healthy.
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: How much older is he than you?
• 8:55
  Speaker 1: How many years?
• 8:56
  Speaker 2: Uh, two and a half years.
• 8:57
  Speaker 1: Okay, that's like exactly my, me and my brother's age.
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: He's two and a half years older than me and I'm asking these questions too, cause I'm like man, how can I?
• 9:02
  Speaker 1: I got a daughter that's four.
• 9:04
  Speaker 1: I don't think skiing is going to be on our plate.
• 9:07
  Speaker 1: You know, living in South Florida, I've literally never skied my whole life, um, and I had never seen snow until I went to college.
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: So I was in a bubble and I was a huge culture shock.
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: I was like this is kind of cool.
• 9:20
  Speaker 1: And then, like three weeks later I was like was like god, this is like not ending, like sucks.
• 9:32
  Speaker 1: I had to dig out of moderation.
• 9:32
  Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, I gotta put salt in the drive like I literally can't drive.
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: This is, this is terrible.
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: It was like bone chilling every day for eight months.
• 9:35
  Speaker 2: It sucked, but anyway you get used to it.
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: Let me tell you I imagine, I imagine for sure, and then it feels weird when you're not, you know, in that.
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: But, um, anyway, right, so, yeah, a little sleeping competitiveness.
• 9:46
  Speaker 1: And I asked, vicariously, as I'm like my daughter who's four, my son just turned two of, like I don't want to be pushing them and then them ultimately rebel, like just rebelling and then just retracting, you know resisting and then not wanting to do it, but just like supporting and just like, hey, just try your best, that's all you can do.
• 10:05
  Speaker 1: You know, um, but you know, still pushing a little bit.
• 10:07
  Speaker 1: Uh, but it's interesting, that's good to hear, because we've, you know, we try to read some things and figure out what nobody, no parent, knows what they're doing, right, but can ask people like you, questions.
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: You know, figured it out, um, that's awesome.
• 10:21
  Speaker 1: So soccer was also a part of that thing.
• 10:23
  Speaker 1: Do you think soccer helps you at all with skiing?
• 10:26
  Speaker 2: Absolutely.
• 10:26
  Speaker 2: I think soccer is so good for hand-eye coordination, body awareness, fitness, also being able to play soccer in the off seasons just kept me in shape so that all fall I was playing soccer, I was running a lot, still being powerful and explosive, and then when ski season rolled around, I had that cross training in my back pocket ready to go.
• 10:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I feel.
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: I totally agree.
• 10:48
  Speaker 1: I think the early sport specialization depends, like on the age and their talent level.
• 10:53
  Speaker 1: You know what I mean, but I'm like getting exposed to a lot of stuff.
• 10:56
  Speaker 1: There's a ton of carryover, you know.
• 10:58
  Speaker 2: Yeah, in the high school I went to at Stratton Mountain School, we still were required to play a fall sport in a spring sport oh nice so that we could also get those cross training benefits.
• 11:07
  Speaker 2: So I played soccer in the fall for the school and then I did lacrosse two years and tennis two years just okay it was.
• 11:14
  Speaker 2: It was great that they encouraged us to do other sports to kind of maintain that balance yeah, so, uh, lower lower body power, um, fit, general fitness, of course.
• 11:27
  Speaker 1: What other carryover do you feel like is a good link between soccer?
• 11:30
  Speaker 1: Lacrosse is a very similar sport, just a stick sport versus foot, um, but for like the dynamics it makes it very similar compared to skiing like.
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: What specific traits of the sport you feel like was a good carryover?
• 11:42
  Speaker 2: I think the hand-eye coordination or even just kind of body awareness and coordination of like in soccer.
• 11:48
  Speaker 2: You're trying to cut and run around other people and you need to know where you are in relation to everyone else on the field at all times.
• 11:56
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 11:57
  Speaker 2: I think that is really important for any other sport and in skiing, you know there's we aren't using our hands so much, but you need to be aware of how fast you're moving, how, how quickly you're coming up on the next turn, where you need to be starting a turn, and the idea of body awareness, what your body is doing at all times and where the kind of key objects are or people are, like gates, kind of carry over to people yeah where I need to know where I'm setting up for this turn and I need to know where my teammates are in this corner, kick things like that.
• 12:30
  Speaker 2: I think there is a lot of crossover, more than you'd even notice.
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, that makes total sense.
• 12:35
  Speaker 1: Um, and so let's talk about it a little bit more.
• 12:37
  Speaker 1: You, your main thing was downhill.
• 12:39
  Speaker 1: What were your your main couple events before you really niched down for for downhill?
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: Like, where were your main couple events before you really niched down for downhill?
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: Like, what were your main ones?
• 12:49
  Speaker 2: I mean.
• 12:49
  Speaker 2: So there's four disciplines of skiing.
• 12:51
  Speaker 2: There are four main disciplines slalom, giant slalom, super G and downhill.
• 12:55
  Speaker 2: And you're not even really allowed to start skiing downhill until you're like 15 or 16.
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: Why is that?
• 13:04
  Speaker 2: And so downhill is the fastest event, gates are the furthest apart, so it's really big turns, really long skis, and you're going speeds anywhere between 60 and 80 miles an hour um, and that's that's so I would imagine like they is.
• 13:22
  Speaker 1: why do they not like people?
• 13:23
  Speaker 1: Are kids downhill skill until 15?
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: Just because of the danger?
• 13:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah, the danger.
• 13:27
  Speaker 2: Um, like you can start learning kind of the technical skills.
• 13:31
  Speaker 2: So there's jumps in downhill and super G, which is kind of the next fastest, so slalom is the slowest, it's the most turns, small turns like quick movements, the opposite end of that spectrum.
• 13:43
  Speaker 2: And then super G is kind of the next closest to downhill.
• 13:47
  Speaker 2: Um, and so those two super G actually was my favorite event the whole time.
• 13:52
  Speaker 2: Um, it was like a little bit more technical, not just truly fearless like screaming down the hill in your face the whole time.
• 13:59
  Speaker 2: Super G, you had to have a little bit more tactical sense, a little more technical sense, gotcha.
• 14:04
  Speaker 2: But yeah, you get to start learning the skills when tactical sense, a little more technical sense, gotcha.
• 14:08
  Speaker 2: But yeah, you get to start learning the skills.
• 14:09
  Speaker 2: When you're younger, learning how to go over jumps, good body position in the air, um but I think they don't really want people getting up to speed too much before they're, like, fully physically developed.
• 14:17
  Speaker 1: Yeah, A little more mature, probably.
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that makes sense.
• 14:20
  Speaker 1: So you uh won the downhill 2017 world championships.
• 14:25
  Speaker 1: What?
• 14:26
  Speaker 1: What happened after that?
• 14:28
  Speaker 2: Uh world junior championships world junior championships Um so that was my second year on the U S ski team on kind of the lower levels, the uh C team at that point.
• 14:39
  Speaker 2: Uh, and after that I ended up being placed on the World Cup team for the next season.
• 14:46
  Speaker 2: I got to go to the World Cup finals of 2017.
• 14:50
  Speaker 2: If you win a World Junior title, they let you go to the finals of the whole World Cup tour.
• 14:57
  Speaker 2: So it's awesome 25 women and men in every discipline get to go to this one race at the end of the year and I was really lucky that that was in Aspen.
• 15:07
  Speaker 2: Normally it's over in Europe somewhere, somewhere far away.
• 15:11
  Speaker 2: So I got to actually go back to the U?
• 15:13
  Speaker 2: S to race in world cup finals Cool, and just try my hand against the very best in the world.
• 15:19
  Speaker 2: How did that go?
• 15:19
  Speaker 2: Oh, I got last for sure.
• 15:22
  Speaker 2: But it was a really amazing experience and showed me you know what it was going to take to compete on the World Cup, and so it.
• 15:30
  Speaker 2: It was a great learning experience for me going into the next year when I actually started full time on the World Cup.
• 15:37
  Speaker 1: Gotcha.
• 15:37
  Speaker 1: So the next year, 2018, full World Cup on the team training and stuff.
• 15:42
  Speaker 2: your training was in salt lake city so in the off season it was all in park city, salt lake city area, um, and then we always do kind of in the off season, late off season, it's winter down in the southern hemisphere.
• 15:57
  Speaker 2: So, uh, we actually did two different trips down to chile, down to south america no way, that's cool and that kind of was our standard summer fall training program and then, once there was enough snow in colorado in november, we've always had a final kind of two weeks a month long prep camp on snow at copper mountain cool how was?
• 16:21
  Speaker 2: Chile, my first year, like with some of my idols, like Lindsey Vonn was still on the team.
• 16:27
  Speaker 1: Oh, really cool.
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: Lauren Ross, Stacy Cook, all of these, these women that I had been watching for years and looked up to.
• 16:34
  Speaker 2: So it was really, really powerful for me to be skiing alongside them.
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's really cool.
• 16:39
  Speaker 1: Your heroes, you know, like to train with them.
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: What was that like?
• 16:42
  Speaker 1: Like once you were with them and you're like we're like peers versus like just a fan, you know.
• 16:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it took me a long time to get used to it.
• 16:52
  Speaker 2: I think I dealt with a lot of imposter syndrome where I felt like I didn't belong next to those women and I I wasn't the same caliber as them.
• 17:01
  Speaker 2: Thankfully, they were also warm and welcoming.
• 17:05
  Speaker 2: They they just, you know, there was no like hazing, none of that.
• 17:10
  Speaker 2: They just turned me under the wings and we're like okay, you're one of us.
• 17:13
  Speaker 2: Now it's time to ski faster.
• 17:15
  Speaker 2: Exactly, and that's really cool.
• 17:20
  Speaker 2: I feel very lucky.
• 17:21
  Speaker 1: What did you learn from them when you were like, oh, now we're in the big leagues and I'm training with these people that were my heroes.
• 17:26
  Speaker 1: Now we're peers battling some imposter syndrome.
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: I want to get that in a second, because totally I was there too, yeah.
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: What'd you learn from?
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: What was the main, what was some of the most impactful things?
• 17:38
  Speaker 2: Learning that they all had their own routines and that there wasn't one formula to success at the top.
• 17:46
  Speaker 2: That was really powerful for me because they opened my eyes to the fact that I could operate whatever way was best for me.
• 17:54
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and I didn't have to like follow some formula that they were all using.
• 17:58
  Speaker 2: Like each one of them had a different routine, a different morning routine, a different training vibe.
• 18:04
  Speaker 2: Like some people wanted to compete at training and so, like one of the women on my team would challenge me to like candy bar races and training, we'd pick a run and say, okay, run three.
• 18:14
  Speaker 2: Winner has a loser, buys the winner at candy bar and like that kind of thing.
• 18:19
  Speaker 2: But another of my teammates hated that kind of competition during training, so I kind of learned that I could figure out my own path forward and and learn how to manage myself instead of just like seeing what they did and following exactly that, and that gave me a lot of space to grow as an individual and I think that helped my career quite a bit.
• 18:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I totally believe that too.
• 18:49
  Speaker 1: Like getting your own persona, your own identity, learning what you like to do, versus like just being forced to do.
• 18:56
  Speaker 1: Like well, this is how it's done.
• 18:58
  Speaker 1: This is how it's always done.
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: Like well, I got my own thing.
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: I don't really like train like that.
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: You know, I love that.
• 19:02
  Speaker 1: I didn't really like train like that.
• 19:03
  Speaker 1: You know, I love that.
• 19:03
  Speaker 1: I didn't really know that until like too late in my humble small college career.
• 19:08
  Speaker 1: You know sports?
• 19:09
  Speaker 1: Um, well, that's, that's awesome.
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: Um, what kind of a trainer were you like?
• 19:18
  Speaker 1: Uh, in practice, did you have to compete or were you like no?
• 19:19
  Speaker 2: I want to be chill and just do my thing.
• 19:20
  Speaker 2: I was a little bit of both.
• 19:21
  Speaker 2: Actually, I liked, you know, first two or three runs to kind of ease into it, depending on.
• 19:28
  Speaker 2: I mean, sometimes we would have time trial races, things like that and I would need to take that more seriously.
• 19:32
  Speaker 2: But I always like to stay relaxed, interact with my teammates, have fun, chat and then, if you know, it was a candy bar race day.
• 19:40
  Speaker 2: I was always into that, I always wanted to be involved and A candy bar it.
• 19:41
  Speaker 2: I was always into that, I always wanted to be involved and candy bar.
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: It's awesome yeah.
• 19:46
  Speaker 2: And pick those runs and and really challenge myself in those moments.
• 19:51
  Speaker 2: But I like even my race day vibe is has always been pretty relaxed and try to keep myself as as light and happy and and laid back as possible.
• 20:01
  Speaker 2: So I kind of just tried to maintain that so that there wasn't any real difference between race day, training day.
• 20:08
  Speaker 2: Just okay, I'm going to ski my best if I'm happy, if I'm relaxed, if I'm like out here having fun and so trying to kind of maintain that the whole time and also avoiding teammates if they weren't that kind of trainer you know like not get in their way and respect everyone's space.
• 20:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I think that was that was key.
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: Like cause, I was like, how do you enlighten or get an athlete to to self reflect and get some self-realization of like, what kind of what's your persona, what's your personality as an athlete?
• 20:42
  Speaker 1: Right, and then she was like, well, I usually encourage them to think back when you were performing your best and you were dominating.
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: What was your persona then?
• 20:50
  Speaker 1: That's probably your identity, right, what's your identity as an athlete?
• 20:53
  Speaker 1: So it sounds like for you, like you were saying, being relaxed, laid back, chill, versus like super intense and like very intense, you know, very intense.
• 21:00
  Speaker 1: So how did you learn that?
• 21:02
  Speaker 1: Or like when did you dive into that type of identity as an athlete of like, hey, I do a lot better when I'm like chill and relaxed.
• 21:10
  Speaker 2: I remember I went down to one one summer camp in New Zealand actually to be on snow and I've been working with a sports psychologist who he was like do you ever just like ski angry?
• 21:23
  Speaker 2: Like do you ever, you know, get really riled up in the start, and so I was like no, like I don't, but maybe I should try that.
• 21:29
  Speaker 2: So he encouraged me to try it and we did some races down in New Zealand and I like try to work myself up, like get really frustrated and angry before I race.
• 21:39
  Speaker 2: And it was terrible, like I was just antsy and stiff and tense and and that was definitely a moment for me where I just kind of gave that a try and understood that that is not for me Like if I can be laid back in every moment leading up to the start.
• 21:58
  Speaker 2: And then for me, like my one cue of trying to kind of get a little extra blood pumping was just flare my nostrils.
• 22:04
  Speaker 2: So I'd be like pulls over the start wand and I would just think, okay, flare your nostrils.
• 22:09
  Speaker 2: And that was enough like not anger, but like a little like angst to bring into kind of the light, happy vibe, a little edginess to bring in.
• 22:17
  Speaker 2: I found that that was for me the perfect balance.
• 22:19
  Speaker 2: But I could not do the full like get angry, find something to be mad at.
• 22:23
  Speaker 2: You.
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: Stop saying that was never me.
• 22:26
  Speaker 1: I was.
• 22:26
  Speaker 1: There was somebody I was working with recently and they were talking about, like I was talking with a coach uh, this kid, this kid's like a young, young tennis, like a high level tennis player and I was talking to their tennis coach and he was like, yeah, if we can like really piss him off and like get him really frustrated, then he gets in a zone and he like crushes it.
• 22:41
  Speaker 1: You know, versus like poking people.
• 22:44
  Speaker 1: You know like getting poked or like something went wrong, or like this is frustrating, and then it's like really sets him off, and then he's like laser focused.
• 22:49
  Speaker 1: How did you learn about the flare nostrils?
• 22:53
  Speaker 1: What'd you think of that?
• 22:55
  Speaker 2: Uh, that was also from a different sports like.
• 22:57
  Speaker 2: Who was like, have you ever thought about just like flare nostrils you get a little extra oxygen like kind of tenses the body a little bit?
• 23:05
  Speaker 2: Um, and so I just tried that because this one sports like told me it might be a good idea.
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: That makes total.
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: I love that.
• 23:16
  Speaker 2: I'm going to use that just in with everything you know, but it's awesome, it's such a simple little cue and it doesn't like make you feel angry or anything, it's just kind of like Ooh okay.
• 23:21
  Speaker 1: It just like helps get you in the zone.
• 23:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly.
• 23:24
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's like it's a simple, it just makes you feel like I'm focused and like I need to like, um, be be the lean into this and get super focused and laser focused.
• 23:32
  Speaker 1: I like that.
• 23:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's really cool.
• 23:34
  Speaker 1: So what was your experience with sports?
• 23:35
  Speaker 1: How many sports psychologists did you work with?
• 23:39
  Speaker 2: I've worked with a fair number of them over the years.
• 23:42
  Speaker 2: One I've worked with consistently, kind of from third year on the team on like 2018, until now.
• 23:51
  Speaker 1: And just jive with them the most.
• 23:53
  Speaker 2: And then kind of have added in people in spaces where I need it.
• 23:56
  Speaker 1: Did you just jive with that person the most, then?
• 23:57
  Speaker 1: Is that the reason why?
• 24:00
  Speaker 2: Sorry.
• 24:00
  Speaker 1: That one, that one sports psych you worked with multiple years.
• 24:04
  Speaker 1: You just seemed to like click the most.
• 24:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah, absolutely Like everything.
• 24:08
  Speaker 2: Every time that we've met, it's sometimes even I just like use him for therapy and he's able to provide, like, exactly what I need, also to give me those cues like flaring my nostrils or helping with training, cues Like even on technical things that I need to work on.
• 24:24
  Speaker 2: He's kind of been able to provide a lot of helpful advice that, you know, maybe my coaches didn't see or that I wasn't able to see myself.
• 24:33
  Speaker 1: Cool, that's really cool.
• 24:34
  Speaker 1: So he was the guy that did the nostril thing.
• 24:37
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 24:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so that's awesome.
• 24:38
  Speaker 1: So, experiences-wise, you've had a couple in between there.
• 24:42
  Speaker 1: This one guy was your main guy, really helpful, apparently.
• 24:46
  Speaker 1: Right, like you would agree, do you feel like it would help to avoid getting in not a great spot, or if you're in a spot, then get out?
• 24:56
  Speaker 1: Like, how frequent?
• 24:57
  Speaker 1: Like, and frequency wise, how frequent would you go see these therapists?
• 25:02
  Speaker 2: during during the off season, because he's based in park city, so I'd see him in the gym all the time, um, and so I'd see him kind of every two weeks or so and then if I felt like needed more, we would ramp it up from there, and then during the winter it was more like every month usually, um, which I probably should have seen him more during that, or zoomed, done meetings, um.
• 25:28
  Speaker 2: But it's also hard when you're in very different time zones and trying to connect remotely.
• 25:35
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm a huge proponent of like the mental game and I that's man.
• 25:40
  Speaker 1: It just makes sense.
• 25:42
  Speaker 1: I feel like listening to elite athletes guys like like Charles Barkley, you know, like MVP, I mean um, like hall of fame type athletes, of course, like Michael Jordan, as an example, but like I just remember hearing even interviews with them and they mentioned like once I got my confidence.
• 25:56
  Speaker 1: Then I knew I was good and I'm like man it seems like the mental game is literally the main differentiator, because guys like you know athletes like yourself, right, girls like yourself that are at that high level you guys are all really good at skiing, right or guys in the NBA, girls in the WNBA, like they're all really good, but like what's the separating factor?
• 26:15
  Speaker 1: I'm like it's gotta be the mental game, right?
• 26:17
  Speaker 1: So it's awesome that you guys really prioritized um staying on top of that, you know, I just think it's going to be a.
• 26:23
  Speaker 1: It's a huge differentiator and game changer that I wish I would have known.
• 26:26
  Speaker 1: That you know Um, but that's uh.
• 26:29
  Speaker 1: So what's another impactful moment you feel like you took away from your sports psychologist besides the nasal flare nostrils that like really helped you.
• 26:40
  Speaker 2: Um, I mean, honestly, one of the times that I leaned on him the most and ended up bringing in more support for my mental game was when I was dealing with my eating disorder.
• 26:52
  Speaker 2: Okay, um, and that kind of came in after the Olympics in 2018, got to a real breaking point in 2020.
• 26:59
  Speaker 2: And I had really great support from from our mental health staff and from that sports psych when I ended up having to go to treatment.
• 27:10
  Speaker 2: I went to to an athlete specific treatment center, uh, in Denver at at athlete edge, at ED care and, and that was incredibly helpful to do six weeks of really intensive treatment.
• 27:22
  Speaker 2: But then, once I was out to then go back to working with this sports psych who kind of just seamlessly helped me pick up where we'd left off and was able to speak to me with the same vocabulary that I knew at treatment and it was never difficult to talk about the body image issues I was dealing with and the eating disorder complications that I was having.
• 27:46
  Speaker 2: All of that just kind of worked seamlessly in and he helped me navigate that recovery and still work towards being an elite athlete, and that was really special.
• 27:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's really cool, um, that you really get the help, like that you know, and then providers that were on the same page, like we get it you know, we sit a lot of patients for orthopedic issues right, like pain in their shoulder, their back, whatever and their knees, and they're like, yeah, I went to this doc and they told me, like just don't run anymore Cause it's bad for your knees, or just don't exercise Cause it's not good for your back.
• 28:18
  Speaker 1: And I'm like, and they're like, I'm just really frustrated Cause I want to exercise.
• 28:21
  Speaker 1: Am I really just hanging up the rest of my life to not like play?
• 28:31
  Speaker 1: You know to exercise and I'm like, oh my gosh, getting you back to being like a high level athlete you know what I mean Like very similar kind of collaborations like you were, you were describing.
• 28:39
  Speaker 1: So it's good that there is hope you know what I mean For for individuals that can find the right providers on their same page and be like this makes sense, like I was born to be in this kind of a, with these people to help me.
• 28:52
  Speaker 1: You know what I mean.
• 28:54
  Speaker 1: That's awesome.
• 28:55
  Speaker 1: That's really cool.
• 28:57
  Speaker 1: So, 2018 Olympics training for?
• 29:02
  Speaker 1: Well, 2016 Olympics that was when you were junior.
• 29:05
  Speaker 1: Right, you're still junior.
• 29:06
  Speaker 1: So did you go to the 2020 Olympics?
• 29:11
  Speaker 2: I went to the 2018 because 16 and 20 were summer.
• 29:16
  Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, Winter Olympics 2018 and 20 were a summer.
• 29:18
  Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, you're totally winter Olympics 2018, winter, okay Gotcha.
• 29:20
  Speaker 1: So 2018 Olympics, you went.
• 29:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 29:24
  Speaker 1: And that was.
• 29:24
  Speaker 1: Where was that again, Remind me.
• 29:26
  Speaker 2: That was in Pyeongchang, South Korea.
• 29:28
  Speaker 1: Pyeongchang, South Korea.
• 29:29
  Speaker 1: That's awesome.
• 29:29
  Speaker 1: How was that?
• 29:33
  Speaker 2: It was such a whirlwind.
• 29:34
  Speaker 2: I actually was told that I was not going to make the team.
• 29:37
  Speaker 2: Uh, we had a really deep women's team that year and so when the initial team was named, I did not make the list.
• 29:46
  Speaker 2: I had qualified based on criteria, but, okay, because we had so many women who were better than me, I didn't make the final list.
• 29:55
  Speaker 1: Um, and is this only for downhill, or was this a different like?
• 29:59
  Speaker 2: this is for downhill, uh and super g for me personally, um, at least like within my team.
• 30:06
  Speaker 2: But yeah the kind of the way the the quota spots work.
• 30:09
  Speaker 2: It's across all alpine, men and women, yes, um, and so they didn't have enough spots for me, but then, unfortunately for one of the male athletes, he got injured like a week and a half before the games and that opened up a spot, and so I then was like the first in line, first alternate, basically who?
• 30:33
  Speaker 2: Then?
• 30:35
  Speaker 2: Because the quota spots, kind of between men and women, there's a lot of flexibility, and so I then was able to get that spot and actually be on the team.
• 30:45
  Speaker 1: That's amazing.
• 30:47
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it was.
• 30:48
  Speaker 2: It was definitely a very emotional thing where I felt so bad for for this one athlete who also was living my dream of getting to go to the Olympics.
• 30:58
  Speaker 2: I ended up competing in the Alpine combined and the slalom, which was a little bit random Cause I was not a slalom skier at that point I'd skied a lot of it throughout my whole career Um, but it was kind of like we got there and they had this extra spot in the slalom event so I got to race that, um, but it was.
• 31:16
  Speaker 2: It was an unbelievable experience and, yeah, I I will definitely never forget that as long as I live.
• 31:25
  Speaker 1: That's amazing.
• 31:25
  Speaker 1: Well, congrats, that's actually really cool.
• 31:28
  Speaker 1: Um, so that's really.
• 31:29
  Speaker 1: I mean, you were the first alternate, like clearly, I'm sure it was a hard decision for initially to not be on the team, but then everything you know the way it worked out.
• 31:37
  Speaker 1: You got to go.
• 31:37
  Speaker 1: How do you feel like you competed that Olympics?
• 31:43
  Speaker 2: I definitely didn't go in.
• 31:44
  Speaker 2: I knew I was not a medal contender, which was definitely not a great mentality to go in with.
• 31:51
  Speaker 2: It was very realistic I hadn't shown any results on the world cup that that would have suggested that I would be a medal contender.
• 31:59
  Speaker 2: And so I think, in the way that I skied and competed, I wish that I had believed in myself a little bit more.
• 32:08
  Speaker 2: But I think I did a really good job of of appreciating every moment that I was there and trying to absorb the Olympics experience as much as I could, and so I wouldn't, I wouldn't change anything about that.
• 32:24
  Speaker 2: I I really took advantage of being at the Olympics and and trying to be as present as I could during those few weeks.
• 32:32
  Speaker 2: So I, other than than maybe trying to believe in myself a little bit more, I, I wouldn't change it.
• 32:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's amazing, um, and from what I've heard from Olympic athletes, it's like everybody stays in one kind of like bubble or like area, like region is that right?
• 32:49
  Speaker 1: And then like for that two week period or three week period, um, and they people compete, they go to different events and they come back and they all hang out.
• 32:57
  Speaker 1: Was that like that, like a cool social experience and like everybody hanging out together?
• 33:02
  Speaker 2: a little bit.
• 33:02
  Speaker 2: We, we were competing like an hour and a half away from the village and so we actually, while we were out at the Alpine venue, weren't staying in the village.
• 33:12
  Speaker 2: So it was like kind of weird, we're staying at this little like campsite basically that had a couple of houses, Um, and we were very isolated.
• 33:21
  Speaker 2: But then at the end of the games, once we were done competing, we moved into the main village and then it was absolutely that social experience.
• 33:29
  Speaker 2: You go to the dining hall it's just every athletes in there and getting pizza two in the morning, Like it was just that's cool.
• 33:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 33:38
  Speaker 1: The dining hall.
• 33:38
  Speaker 1: It sounds like college.
• 33:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah, no, it totally felt like it too.
• 33:43
  Speaker 1: It was just crazy.
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: That's awesome.
• 33:46
  Speaker 1: Um, so I appreciate you sharing more, diving into uh the eating um issues that you were had, like the eating disorder, um cause I know there's a lot of athletes that battle this, of course and also the body image um, where I something I read um 30% of elite athletes around 30%, uh, elite athletes struggle with disordered eating hidden underneath their peak performance um training and their efforts and the way they're excelling.
• 34:17
  Speaker 1: When do you feel like you started noticing or started battling the eating disorder?
• 34:26
  Speaker 2: For me, I really started struggling after the Olympics.
• 34:31
  Speaker 2: I kind of came down from the rush of the 2018 games and there's something about going from like the ultimate life high and you know, suddenly you're an Olympian, you have this new title.
• 34:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 34:48
  Speaker 2: Kind of a big ego boost, and then I that's a huge title Olympian.
• 34:53
  Speaker 2: I came back and I actually went to my first term of college that spring and I saw all of these students who knew what they wanted to do with their lives, who knew their majors.
• 35:07
  Speaker 2: They seemed to have everything lined up and I felt like without skiing, I was no one.
• 35:16
  Speaker 2: I couldn't think of my identity outside of the sport, and that made me very ashamed and very self-critical, and so it was kind of at that point that I really started to turn inwards and start critiquing myself, both as kind of you know, what do I have to offer other than skiing?
• 35:35
  Speaker 2: And also, okay, if I only have skiing, I need to be like the perfect athlete.
• 35:40
  Speaker 2: And so I was really harsh on myself in terms of body image, in terms of what I was eating and it kind of.
• 35:48
  Speaker 2: I just it went unchecked for two plus years and especially when the pandemic settled in in 2020, that was kind of for me the the final, final thing, that that really flipped that switch where I really spiraled into anorexia and and my health declined really fast over over the few summer, spring, summer, fall months, uh, of 2020 and eventually ended up in treatment in November of 2020.
• 36:21
  Speaker 1: Gotcha.
• 36:21
  Speaker 1: Uh, what school were you at?
• 36:23
  Speaker 2: Uh, Dartmouth.
• 36:24
  Speaker 1: Uh, dartmouth, okay, we have an athlete.
• 36:26
  Speaker 1: I just committed there.
• 36:27
  Speaker 1: Oh, that's really cool.
• 36:29
  Speaker 1: How did you like Dartmouth?
• 36:30
  Speaker 2: Yes, I actually have one more term.
• 36:32
  Speaker 2: I graduated.
• 36:32
  Speaker 2: I walked in graduation this spring.
• 36:34
  Speaker 1: Oh, no way.
• 36:34
  Speaker 1: Well, have an athlete I just committed there.
• 36:36
  Speaker 1: That's really cool, did you like Dartmouth?
• 36:38
  Speaker 1: Yes, I actually have one more term.
• 36:39
  Speaker 1: I graduated.
• 36:39
  Speaker 1: I walked in graduation this spring.
• 36:40
  Speaker 1: Oh no, way.
• 36:41
  Speaker 2: Well, congrats.
• 36:41
  Speaker 2: Very final term in the fall, cool yeah.
• 36:43
  Speaker 1: That's amazing.
• 36:44
  Speaker 1: What's your?
• 36:44
  Speaker 1: What ended up studying what?
• 36:45
  Speaker 2: was your major Government.
• 36:45
  Speaker 2: I'm a government major.
• 36:46
  Speaker 2: Wow, okay, that's heavy.
• 36:46
  Speaker 1: That's now, yeah, right, I mean, oh my gosh, we won't get in that.
• 36:49
  Speaker 1: But like that's well, dartmouth, I mean it's an Ivy League school.
• 36:52
  Speaker 1: So I imagine, and it makes sense, you're a super competitive, high-level athlete and you're always wanted to train super hard and be the best.
• 37:02
  Speaker 1: And I imagine, when the sport has been removed from what I've heard from other professionals as well Like it's not my thing of like this field, of like sports psychology by any means, but what they were saying, like once it's removed, and then there's like the, there's this limbo area of like well, now, who am I?
• 37:17
  Speaker 1: I don't even know who I am.
• 37:18
  Speaker 1: You know, yeah, um, so I can imagine that competitiveness trickled in um to other areas.
• 37:24
  Speaker 1: You know, uh, when it's skiing wasn't in the mix, um, so, but people had kids, students at Dartmouth Ivy league.
• 37:35
  Speaker 2: I mean, that's like from a student, uh, comparison standpoint, it doesn't get any more competitive than that from an academic standpoint so yeah, everyone seems very put together, everyone there, so smart and has such an amazing story and I just I really again kind of the imposter syndrome, came back like, oh my god, like I'm not this well-rounded human being that everyone else here is I have nothing like, just like a dumb jock here.
• 37:59
  Speaker 1: I'm very confident to imagine.
• 38:01
  Speaker 1: I'm sure all the other students were like oh man, alice, she's an Olympian.
• 38:05
  Speaker 1: Like I don't belong here.
• 38:06
  Speaker 1: We got Olympians at our school, like what um?
• 38:08
  Speaker 1: So you ended up going government route for studying.
• 38:09
  Speaker 1: That's really cool.
• 38:10
  Speaker 1: What's your plan?
• 38:11
  Speaker 1: Like I don't belong here.
• 38:11
  Speaker 1: We've got Olympians at our school, like what?
• 38:12
  Speaker 1: So you ended up going government route for studying.
• 38:13
  Speaker 1: That's really cool.
• 38:14
  Speaker 1: What's your plan?
• 38:14
  Speaker 1: What's your one year, five year, 10?
• 38:18
  Speaker 2: I'm just kidding, I'm just joking.
• 38:20
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I have no idea.
• 38:22
  Speaker 2: That was when you got in like a year.
• 38:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly, heck, I didn't know what I was doing.
• 38:26
  Speaker 1: I didn't even know it would become a sports physical therapist until my senior year in college.
• 38:29
  Speaker 1: About where you're at, yeah, before that I was going to be a firefighter.
• 38:33
  Speaker 1: A full send, yeah.
• 38:35
  Speaker 1: And then my last semester, I remember having a conversation with my dad and he was like you're doing pretty good these biology classes.
• 38:40
  Speaker 1: You're going to be like, you know, consider something else.
• 38:42
  Speaker 1: And I was like, hmm, I guess I will, you know.
• 38:44
  Speaker 1: Um, so there's no rush by any means.
• 38:46
  Speaker 1: So Dartmouth is fun.
• 38:49
  Speaker 1: I imagine it's a good time, I'm sure very rigorous academically.
• 38:56
  Speaker 2: Definitely there are a lot of US ski teamers actually who have been doing Dartmouth part-time kind of same track as me where it takes us a lot longer than four years but we're able to compete during the winter and then, kind of go to school in the spring, spring, summer.
• 39:10
  Speaker 2: So, it's been cool to do that alongside a bunch of teammates.
• 39:13
  Speaker 1: So you were dabbling in both part-time Dartmouth student full training.
• 39:18
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, how were you able to navigate that schedule?
• 39:23
  Speaker 2: It was a lot honestly.
• 39:24
  Speaker 2: I mean, dartmouth schedule is really conducive, where if we go only in the 10 weeks in the spring, that's kind of our our least active training phase, cause usually we get a couple of weeks off after the end of the season, so that's like first few weeks of school and then trainings, like slowly ramping up through the rest of the term.
• 39:47
  Speaker 2: Usually I'd have to miss a week of school to go to a spring on snow camp in California, and so then it took a lot of juggling with trying to talk professors into letting me skip a week and right.
• 40:00
  Speaker 2: And also then letting my coaches understand that I like wasn't gonna be able to do every single activity with the team because I had to go to homework.
• 40:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and it, it.
• 40:11
  Speaker 2: It took a lot of juggling, but also having gone to a ski Academy where I was, you know, trying to do school and skiing the whole time in high school, I think that set me up really well for them being able to understand the time management that I needed.
• 40:23
  Speaker 1: Right, totally.
• 40:24
  Speaker 1: It's interesting.
• 40:25
  Speaker 1: I always love getting opinions on that because we have a lot of people like our listeners that's like well, I don't have time, I'm very busy, I don't have time to work out.
• 40:35
  Speaker 1: Nope, I don't have time to manage this and like do that.
• 40:37
  Speaker 1: Um, what suggestions would you make for busy moms and dads or busy professionals that are like I don't have to, I can't find the time to do workouts Like I want to.
• 40:46
  Speaker 1: You know, what do you suggest?
• 40:50
  Speaker 2: I mean realistically.
• 40:51
  Speaker 2: I think it's all about balance, like if you really do have a ton on your plate, then it's okay to you know, prioritize one thing over the other and at the same time, there are a lot of creative ways you can multitask Like I would have.
• 41:06
  Speaker 2: I would put on like the PDF reader and an AirPod and go work out.
• 41:11
  Speaker 2: So I'd like to be reading the PDFs and be backspotting.
• 41:15
  Speaker 1: Absorb some yeah, Absorb some information while getting workout in.
• 41:19
  Speaker 2: Trying to kind of do that where I could, and and also just like setting aside like chunks of time where I would, you know, go a hundred percent into school, right, like I have an hour in the afternoon where I don't have a workout, I'm not training, like just school, right then, and just do as much as I can.
• 41:36
  Speaker 2: And then, when I'm on Hill, like I'm not thinking about school at all, I'm just focusing on school and also respecting what my body, what my brain needs, and if I need to rest, if I need to not do any of those things, like that's also okay.
• 41:49
  Speaker 2: And and allowing myself the space to to listen to what I needed.
• 41:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah.
• 41:54
  Speaker 1: So, from a tactical standpoint, you would, you would recommend just balance prioritizing and then some block scheduling of like I have an hour, I'm going to be full laser focused on one thing, not thinking about this, not thinking about which is hard to do to like, shift your focus.
• 42:10
  Speaker 1: But so block scheduling to fit um and chunks the things that you need.
• 42:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah, honestly, for me that's helped a lot.
• 42:18
  Speaker 2: Like I think, in a weird way it's really nice to be like, okay, in this hour I'm only going to think about school and like every other thing that I might be worrying about right now.
• 42:28
  Speaker 2: Like I get to just tune that all out.
• 42:29
  Speaker 2: So in a weird way, it's really nice, cause I only have to focus on one thing, right.
• 42:37
  Speaker 1: So, like trying to reframe it as like, okay, this is actually great to only have to think about one thing at a time.
• 42:41
  Speaker 2: I love that.
• 42:41
  Speaker 2: Things that are all stressing me out in their own way.
• 42:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a great way to frame that.
• 42:45
  Speaker 1: I love that.
• 42:45
  Speaker 1: I never thought of that.
• 42:46
  Speaker 1: Like, hey, when you only have to focus on one thing right now, this is easy.
• 42:49
  Speaker 1: Like, oh, that's, that's way better.
• 42:51
  Speaker 1: I'm going to, I'm going to steal that.
• 42:53
  Speaker 1: I like that for my own life, can I do?
• 42:55
  Speaker 2: that.
• 42:55
  Speaker 2: Can I take that from you?
• 42:58
  Speaker 1: 100%.
• 42:58
  Speaker 1: So you um, all right.
• 42:59
  Speaker 1: So imposter syndrome you mentioned that a couple of times.
• 43:01
  Speaker 1: I heard correct me if I'm wrong, if any additions um, imposter syndrome for people aren't familiar, it's like the sense of I'm under, like underneath this, I'm actually a fraud and it's only a matter of time until I'm exposed as as a fraud.
• 43:24
  Speaker 1: You know, I don't really belong here, right, and it's only a matter of time until I'm exposed, which doesn't isn't great for confidence and the belief that, like, right, I belong here and then performing well, Right, um, a little bit of like this is cool, I'm not gonna, I'm not really here to meddle, right, well, it's like, well, yeah, why not, you know?
• 43:42
  Speaker 1: If not, why not me, you know, but anyway, some I definitely battled with.
• 43:55
  Speaker 1: I don't even know what I was battling, you know, until later, and I was like reflecting and looking back.
• 43:57
  Speaker 1: But a couple like several things I remember when I was in college, like playing football, um, I was named a starter for tight end as a sophomore and I looked at the depth chart it was just posted and I was like, nah, I can't be.
• 44:03
  Speaker 1: No, this doesn't be a typo, I just can't be right, you know.
• 44:07
  Speaker 1: And it, of course, affected my performance, um, and then even professionally, like going through fellowship, training and like other specialty stuff in the room of like really smart individuals, and I'm like I really don't belong here, like this isn't real.
• 44:20
  Speaker 1: You know, I don't think I actually belong in this room.
• 44:24
  Speaker 1: You know, um, which definitely affects performance and ability.
• 44:27
  Speaker 1: You know, does that sound pretty accurate, like would you make any additions to that?
• 44:51
  Speaker 2: when I go down the mountain like they're all going to see that I don't belong and it's going to be horribly embarrassing and I'm going to get kicked off the ski team Like yeah, yeah, Like I.
• 44:56
  Speaker 2: I just so did not believe that I, I was a peer to any of the people I was competing against.
• 45:03
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 45:03
  Speaker 1: Any suggestions?
• 45:04
  Speaker 1: What do you think helped for you?
• 45:08
  Speaker 2: Trying to turn that off, just remembering the training that I had done and everything that had brought me to that moment, instead of thinking about, like, what's happening around me right now, where I would look around and see all these women and not feel like I could perform against them, and instead think about myself, my own journey, all of the training that I had done, everything I'd done to prepare for that moment, and just like really focusing only on myself and what I can control I think that's something that's been hammered into me throughout my whole career is just worry about what you can control.
• 45:42
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 45:43
  Speaker 2: And so that was really key for me.
• 45:46
  Speaker 1: That makes total sense.
• 45:47
  Speaker 1: I've heard that too.
• 45:48
  Speaker 1: Like, what can you control?
• 45:50
  Speaker 1: What can you not control?
• 45:51
  Speaker 1: Number one, and then focus on what things you can.
• 45:54
  Speaker 1: That's actually going to make a difference right now, totally.
• 45:57
  Speaker 1: And then, um, that makes leaning on and, um, really focusing on what did I do leading up to this?
• 46:05
  Speaker 1: That makes me I'm here, right, I here physically I wouldn't be here if I didn't and focusing on, uh, or remembering all the training and stuff that led to that ability to be there.
• 46:18
  Speaker 1: Um, so leaning, it adds credibility of like, oh, I am self, you know self-credibility, okay, that makes sense.
• 46:25
  Speaker 1: So leaning back on the things you've done in the past that got you in the first place adds credibility in your own head.
• 46:30
  Speaker 1: And not worrying about currently what's going on and then who's maybe around you, that might erode those confident thoughts that make sense.
• 46:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so did you constantly work on that, like before training, before meets and stuff like that?
• 46:44
  Speaker 1: Did you have like a pre, like a very intense moment coming up?
• 46:48
  Speaker 1: We have training or we have this competition or this um, uh, event, right, this meet.
• 46:53
  Speaker 1: Would you have like a pre routine that you go through your head or would you meet with your sports psych?
• 47:00
  Speaker 2: Um, honestly, as as time went on, especially after like the first year, year and a half, being on the world cup, I I started to understand, like, honestly, I started to get to know a lot of my competitors, I became friends with a lot of them, and that actually helped a ton for me.
• 47:15
  Speaker 2: It was just understanding that they're all real people and they're not just like these gods that I've watched competing, and so I I stopped having that imposter syndrome once.
• 47:29
  Speaker 2: I kind of understood that they're just people too, right and and so I wouldn't need to to gear up to go to a world cup mentally at all.
• 47:39
  Speaker 2: I could just show up and and for me that kind of personal connection helped a lot.
• 47:44
  Speaker 1: That's good.
• 47:45
  Speaker 1: I like that.
• 47:45
  Speaker 1: They're just people too.
• 47:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I like that.
• 47:48
  Speaker 1: I'm going to use that.
• 47:48
  Speaker 1: I'm still not one of steel, if that's all right.
• 47:51
  Speaker 1: Um, okay, last couple of questions.
• 47:53
  Speaker 1: Um, then we'll look and to help people that might be in a similar boat that you were battling right With.
• 47:57
  Speaker 1: You mentioned anorexia and then, uh with, uh, eating disorder.
• 48:00
  Speaker 1: Um, and it was right after the 2018 Olympics.
• 48:03
  Speaker 1: Is that correct?
• 48:04
  Speaker 1: And then the pandemic really helped to amplify that.
• 48:07
  Speaker 1: When do you feel like you got to a point where, like, I need to.
• 48:11
  Speaker 1: I need to, like, get a handle on this or I need to talk to somebody?
• 48:16
  Speaker 2: I had, my boyfriend actually had spoken to me.
• 48:20
  Speaker 2: So, like March I'd say March 2020 was when, like the eating sort of really kicked into gear.
• 48:26
  Speaker 2: Um, and I didn't get treatment until November, starting in November.
• 48:29
  Speaker 2: Yeah, in about May, my boyfriend came to me and he said hey, I I Googled a lot of the things you've been doing and saying and I noticed you change a lot in the last few months.
• 48:40
  Speaker 2: I typed it into Google and it sounds like you might've been eating disorder.
• 48:47
  Speaker 2: And I just kind of laughed at him because I was was like no, I wouldn't, I wouldn't do that to myself, like I had no education on eating disorders.
• 48:56
  Speaker 2: So I thought, no, no, no with like that's not me, it's possible.
• 48:59
  Speaker 2: And I I kind of ignored that giant red flag, uh, for a bunch of months and, and it wasn't until September that I went to an on-hill skiing camp and just could not function at all, like my body was breaking down and I didn't have the strength and the stamina that I used to have.
• 49:25
  Speaker 2: And then I needed to be an elite athlete, um, and that was when it really hit me that something was wrong.
• 49:31
  Speaker 2: I mean, I I thought I hated skiing.
• 49:33
  Speaker 2: I I didn't like hanging out with my teammates.
• 49:37
  Speaker 2: I had just become such a shell of who I was and and nothing brought me joy, and I also could not perform physically at all.
• 49:48
  Speaker 1: Gotcha.
• 49:49
  Speaker 1: So that was September 2020.
• 49:51
  Speaker 1: And then between September and November that's when November is when we really dove into some treatment.
• 49:57
  Speaker 1: Between those two months, what led you to actually pursue treatment, or not right after September?
• 50:05
  Speaker 1: In that event, in September, that event in September.
• 50:14
  Speaker 2: So I got set up with like kind of an outpatient team who were all really helpful from kind of September on, and yet things just kept getting worse.
• 50:19
  Speaker 2: I was still really unhealthy and couldn't convince myself to eat enough and didn't really understand that what was actually happening where, like, the pathways, the neural pathways in my brain, were wired in such a different way from what I was used to, and so, even though I had this amazing team around me, kind of, it was still COVID, so it was all like very remote, not a lot of hands-on work.
• 50:49
  Speaker 2: I I couldn't hold myself accountable enough because the eating disorder just had such a deep hold on me.
• 50:55
  Speaker 2: And so by November, when things hadn't actually gotten any better, even with this amazing remote team, that was when it was it was time to to really seek something more intensive and and actually go to athlete, edge uh and get the help I needed.
• 51:13
  Speaker 1: Gotcha, anything, looking back, that you feel like could have helped with coaches or other professional sports professionals to help support you during this time, or, uh, that you would encourage current athletes if they recognize, um, an issue like this?
• 51:30
  Speaker 1: Um, what do you, what do you recommend for a better supportive ecosystem?
• 51:36
  Speaker 2: Uh all around for both coaches and athletes starting at a young age in in sports and just making sure that mental health is kind of built into every athlete's education and in every coach's education when they become a coach, or kind of built into every athlete's education and in every coach's education when they become a coach or kind of enter that pipeline.
• 51:55
  Speaker 2: I think if everyone could understand the warning signs and if athletes could understand that, even if they don't, you know, think an eating disorder is a risk for them, that it doesn't actually work the way that I think we all learned in health class and those things can sneak up, because it certainly blindsided me.
• 52:13
  Speaker 2: Um, I think increasing education honestly is, is the best step we can take.
• 52:18
  Speaker 1: Interesting.
• 52:19
  Speaker 1: So, education, coaches, education, educating the young athletes hey, this could be a, this is a thing, just a heads up, Um and then, uh, more recognition of warning signs so that coaches and trainers and sports professionals can intervene parents maybe as well.
• 52:32
  Speaker 1: Interesting.
• 52:33
  Speaker 1: Our last question what advice would you give young athletes that want to be an olympian?
• 52:39
  Speaker 2: I would say trust yourself, um, if you lean in to your passion for your sport 100, that is really all you can ask of yourself and just trust that, that you know what you need and that you belong where you're competing.
• 52:58
  Speaker 2: I think that there is nothing more powerful than than self-belief and confidence, and it's a lot easier said than done, but if you practice that every single day, then then it will become automatic and it can actually get you where you want to go.
• 53:13
  Speaker 1: Awesome.
• 53:14
  Speaker 1: Well, I appreciate you coming on.
• 53:15
  Speaker 1: I appreciate you sharing your story, getting vulnerable and sharing more of your history.
• 53:19
  Speaker 1: And what's next?
• 53:22
  Speaker 1: So you're going to graduate and then find out what government direction you're going to go Presidential candidate in 2048?
• 53:28
  Speaker 1: I have no idea, oh God.
• 53:29
  Speaker 2: I am not interested in politics that's awesome.
• 53:33
  Speaker 1: Well, again, thanks for coming on.
• 53:35
  Speaker 1: I appreciate it um thank you for having me yeah, totally, and if we're always open to helping people, if you have any questions, comments, concerns, suggestions or conflicting opinions, don't hesitate to reach out.
• 53:45
  Speaker 1: We're always open to other ideas for this podcast and if you have any questions as a patient, right for people that want to reach out to us, the best way to reach out to us is 561-899-8725.
• 53:54
  Speaker 1: That's our phone number to get in direct line with us, or you can email us at team at athleterccom, and if you want anybody to reach out to you, like if any questions, young athletes, what's the best way they can reach out to you?
• 54:12
  Speaker 2: If you want information On my.
• 54:13
  Speaker 1: Instagram.
• 54:13
  Speaker 1: I am at AllieWeather underscore and that's definitely the best way to reach out to me.
• 54:15
  Speaker 1: Cool, we'll tag you, we'll follow you and we'll engage on social media and stuff and let you know when we post this so we get you out there.
• 54:19
  Speaker 1: But thanks again for coming in and we'll we'll catch y'all next time.