Latest / Dear Divorce Diary: A Fresh Approach To Healing Grief & Building A Life Of Confidence After Divorce / 162. Unlock Healing from Divorce in Your Sleep Using Brainwaves, Positive Affirmations & Manifesting

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162. Unlock Healing from Divorce in Your Sleep Using Brainwaves, Positive Affirmations & Manifesting · Dear Divorce Diary: A Fresh Approach To Healing Grief & Building A Life Of Confidence After Divorce

• 0:49
  Speaker 1: Hi love, today we are talking about whether or not you are healing in your sleep.
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: Now, there are certain conditions that need to be met in order for you to heal your body, your mind, your trauma in your sleep.
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: But do you know whether or not you are and do you know how to positively influence your sleep so that you're healing?
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: Hi love, welcome to Dear Divorce Diary, the podcast helping divorcees go beyond talk therapy to process your grief, find the healing you crave and build back your confidence.
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: I'm your host, dawn Wiggins, a therapist, coach, integrative healer and divorcee.
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: Join me for a fresh approach to healing grief and building your confidence after divorce.
• 1:36
  Speaker 1: In today's episode, I'm going to teach you some of the brainwave states that you rely on throughout the day and night.
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: I'm going to teach you what things you may or may not be doing that are actually blocking you from healing in your sleep.
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: I'm going to teach you some easy things that you can do to improve your healing in your sleep, because you know, a download I've been getting lately is it doesn't have to be that hard.
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: It doesn't have to be that hard.
• 2:13
  Speaker 1: So it's like our bodies were designed to heal themselves if they have the conditions needed to be able to reach for healing and complete healing, and so oftentimes we're just doing way too many things in a day that blocks that completion of healing.
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: And so we're going to talk about some of those things today, right, and we're going to really reach for easier healing, because it doesn't need to be that hard.
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: We just got to get out of our own ways in the really amazing ways.
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: So first things first, let's talk about brainwaves.
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: Now, there are two brainwaves that you primarily use while you are awake and you are thinking or attempting to think, right, and so don't get too caught up in the names, but just an overview, right, so for a little learning sesh.
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: So gamma is a problem-solving wave.
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: If you were looking at like a brain scan right now, gamma would have like the busiest lines, right, with peaks and valleys.
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: It would be busy, busy, busy lines.
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: Gamma, it's like you're problem solving, you're concentrating.
• 3:14
  Speaker 1: The next one is beta, also a busy, active mind.
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: So these are two brainwaves that you're using while you're awake and if you're an overthinker, you know you may spend a lot of extra time in these brainwaves.
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: They are not healing brainwaves.
• 3:32
  Speaker 1: Extra time in these brainwaves, they are not healing brainwaves.
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: And so one of the reasons why things like affirmations and EMDR EFT tapping might be harder for you to benefit from.
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: If you're an overthinker and you struggle to be in different brainwave states, right, you're going to be less suggestible.
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: In gamma and beta your brain is less relaxed, it's more engaged, it's more like on a mission, so it's not as open to receiving new ideas.
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: Necessarily, in a relaxed state we're able to learn often much, much faster.
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: So gamma and beta is busy driven thinking brainwave states.
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: Then we drop down.
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: If we were looking at the little chart right of measuring brain activity, we would see alpha, which is a reflective restful state.
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: We would kind of associate this with nervous system green.
• 4:28
  Speaker 1: Not that you can't be nervous system green in the other two, you could, but think of nervous system green in the other two.
• 4:34
  Speaker 1: You could but think of nervous system green just feeling like relaxed.
• 4:37
  Speaker 1: This is like a Sunday afternoon in a hammock kind of thing.
• 4:39
  Speaker 1: Right, ideally we're all experiencing alpha every day, but I don't think alpha is a very common brainwave state in our current culture.
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: I think that when we're scrolling and we're drinking and we're overstimulated, I just don't think we're good at leveraging alpha state in our current society.
• 4:58
  Speaker 1: So just notice that, right.
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: But when you're walking through the woods, soaking up the trees and the forest, that's like what I want you to think of alpha, reflective and restful, right, like bathing in trees.
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: And this isn't a place where your subconscious mind is going to start to become more available and probably more open to suggestion, more open to, like it says, reflection, right.
• 5:23
  Speaker 1: Then we start to approach sleep states from there.
• 5:28
  Speaker 1: So, less busy than alpha is theta and that's drowsiness, right.
• 5:32
  Speaker 1: So that's like, as you're drifting off to sleep, that's theta.
• 5:36
  Speaker 1: That's also a wonderful time to be accessing the subconscious mind, highly suggestible, great time to be utilizing certain things like affirmations and guided meditation, really beautiful time to just be priming your brain for a healing sleep, for a positive, non-scary sleep, right.
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: And so down from theta is delta, and it's a low brainwave, not a lot of activity, but doesn't mean that it's not listening.
• 6:08
  Speaker 1: The brain is always listening.
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: Did you know that, whether you're awake or you're asleep, the brain is still scanning its environment and is listening and is processing information external to you all the time?
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: And so when we're in that delta sleep, which is the deepest sleep, is when we dream, it's when we process our days, it's when we process unprocessed emotion.
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: It's the place in which we have nightmares.
• 6:34
  Speaker 1: So if you have nightmares, I have the perfect homeopathic remedy for you.
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: It's where the body detoxifies the brain and goes into healing phase for whatever ailment or illness you're experiencing.
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: It is certainly where you would be healing from various traumas.
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: It is the place.
• 6:57
  Speaker 1: When I do EMDR with clients in session, I say to them you can expect to have crazy dreams after EMDR sessions because you're doing extra processing, because we accessed all that content during the EMDR session, and so it's literally Delta sleep is where the brain is processing and filing away and working with all those EMDR sessions and it's where it consolidates those gains and starts to rewire your neural networks.
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: So Delta sleep is what we're reaching for right.
• 7:29
  Speaker 1: However, many of us don't get nearly enough delta sleep and it slows down our healing, both physically, mentally and emotionally.
• 7:38
  Speaker 1: Now, what are some things that interrupt delta sleep?
• 7:41
  Speaker 1: Well, alcohol, for one.
• 7:43
  Speaker 1: Alcohol often helps us fall asleep and a lot of people rely on it for that, but then it actually keeps the brain overstimulated so that it is not dropping into that super healing delta state.
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: So if you're someone who's used to having a glass of wine or two to help you get to sleep, you are literally sabotaging your own healing love.
• 8:06
  Speaker 1: Another thing is THC.
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: It's less disruptive than alcohol, but it still reduces the amount of time you spend in delta sleep.
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: So these are some things to keep in mind that, if you are someone who relies on substances, that you want to be kind of planning a different route to getting to sleep where you don't have to rely on external substances.
• 8:32
  Speaker 1: Now, for years, loves, I required so many different sleep medications in order just to sleep and no wonder I wasn't actually healing right.
• 8:41
  Speaker 1: But there are so many tools that we talk about on the podcast that will get you, over time, off those sleep meds and get you into a truly healing healing state.
• 8:52
  Speaker 1: So what are some of the things that you can do to promote delta sleep so that you're healing?
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: Well, you hear me talk a lot about how everything is vibrational right, and so there are so many things that we can do to tap into the benefits of vibration and certain frequencies.
• 9:13
  Speaker 1: I'm sure you've heard of binaural beats or music that is at a 528 hertz vibration, and there are lots of different types of binaural beats and different vibrations that you can listen to in meditations or just tracks to help train your brain.
• 9:30
  Speaker 1: But one of my favorites is one that is 528 Hertz, because that is the vibration of love, it's the vibration of healing, it's the vibration where our bodies, our cells of our bodies can be getting the cue that it is safe to heal.
• 9:45
  Speaker 1: And so, certainly over the years, I have used 528 Hertz music while I work and while I sleep and while I meditate and while I do all sorts of things to help me retrain my brain and cue the cells of my body that it is time and it is safe to heal.
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: So if you are prepping for sleep, then it's a lovely idea to be using music tracks that help train your brain to prepare for sleep, so that you are more likely to get some nice chunks of delta sleep while you sleep.
• 10:18
  Speaker 1: Now, you know what I did before sleep.
• 10:20
  Speaker 1: When I was going through divorce, I watched TV, watch TV, and I still do that quite often.
• 10:27
  Speaker 1: But that is not when you are going through something massive and you need healing more than anything.
• 10:34
  Speaker 1: Watching TV to fall asleep is not the best thing for you.
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: In fact, it's probably priming your brain to have more stress and more stressful sleep.
• 10:44
  Speaker 1: So there have been many, many phases in my life where I have really prioritized listening to healing tracks while I fall to sleep so that I can help my brain have everything it possibly can.
• 10:58
  Speaker 1: You know the years you've heard me talk about well.
• 11:00
  Speaker 1: I had cluster headaches and these types of things and physical illness.
• 11:02
  Speaker 1: There were lots of times where I highly prioritized once I understood what they were giving my body and my mind and my brain, specifically these tools so that it could really access the healing that it needed in order to recover from the various traumas and the health issues.
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: So something that we have decided to do over here that is so exciting we've been planning it for months, but the moment is finally here is we have started creating some guided meditation tracks, utilizing and leveraging 528 hertz music and delta waves, while giving you this podcast voice that you say that you love to help you fall asleep and experience more delta sleep while you are in bed, and so we have created two tracks to start.
• 11:53
  Speaker 1: These are very, very exciting.
• 11:54
  Speaker 1: One is specific for healing sleep and one is specific for focus, one of the things that I have seen so many women much of ADD symptoms really is complex post-traumatic stress disorder and the various toxins that we're exposed to in daily life, the ways that we are overstimulated in daily life, the endocrine disruptors that are in our cleaning products and our skincare products, and you name it right.
• 12:32
  Speaker 1: We're just exposed to so many things that are affecting our brain health, whether it's the pesticides in the food, you name it and then the traumas that we experience impact our brains in a way that ends up looking a lot like ADD, and so we created also a guided meditation that could be used for sleep.
• 12:51
  Speaker 1: Certainly that helps you with focus and consistency and follow through.
• 12:57
  Speaker 1: We are so excited to start to bring these tracks to you.
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: We know that they are going to absolutely help you prepare for sleep differently and have better quality sleep, and it is really just in line with this idea that it doesn't have to be so hard love.
• 13:12
  Speaker 1: And so, if you're one of the amazing women that has said I listened to your podcast, it is so soothing and it really helps me feel grounded and it really helps me feel hope, you may want to consider using some of these guided meditations to help you fall asleep.
• 13:29
  Speaker 1: It's got these tracks in the background that are going to absolutely work with your brain chemistry to help you move into a state of relaxation and get that deeper, more healing sleep and get you better results for all the effort that you're putting in in a day, right?
• 13:44
  Speaker 1: I know how overwhelmed you are.
• 13:46
  Speaker 1: I know how much you've got going on.
• 13:48
  Speaker 1: So not only are we creating some of these guided meditations, but I have been creating some custom EFT tapping videos not videos, audios and I've also been partnering with some other providers to bring some very unique healing tracks, things that you are not going to find anywhere else love and so we've got some very exciting content coming to you in the next couple of days and weeks.
• 14:12
  Speaker 1: This is a big, big, big deal, and so you're going to notice inside your podcast app that there are certain tracks that have a little lock next to them, and that is because this content is going to be paid content for folks who want to be behind the scenes, getting this extra juicy stuff that we are making for you to heal while you sleep and whatnot.
• 14:32
  Speaker 1: So it's $5 a month for you to access the paid content, but it is going to be absolutely science-backed healing tools that are going to help you while you sleep, while you're driving in the car, while you are just folding the laundry or taking care of business, and it's going to take all of the delicious things that we talk about here on the podcast and help you imply them as treatment, because we can't think ourselves better, right, I love that you are here and you are learning, but also we need to apply and we need to integrate, and you don't have a lot of extra time and it's pretty overwhelming right now, right?
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: So this is something you can literally do in your sleep or in car line when you're waiting to pick up the kiddos or drop them off or you name it, or you're shuffling them around after school.
• 15:19
  Speaker 1: That is going to absolutely make a difference in your healing process.
• 15:23
  Speaker 1: So today we've talked about the idea that you absolutely heal in your sleep, as long as you are getting the barriers to healing in your sleep out of the way, right?
• 15:33
  Speaker 1: So you've been able to take a look at what substances you might be using that are blocking you from getting to delta brainwaves so that you can heal in your sleep.
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: We have looked at the ways that you can upregulate delta, which is by using these particular types of meditative tracks, and you have just learned that I have made some of those tracks specifically for you love and that for $5 a month you can access this amazing content.
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: We'll be adding to the library periodically all kinds of unique types of healing that you are not going to find anywhere else.
• 16:04
  Speaker 1: I cannot wait for you to hear about some of the stuff that's coming down the pipe.
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: I have an interview coming out soon with a therapist I met in Scotland and she creates quantum healing tracks.
• 16:15
  Speaker 1: She did a bit of quantum healing with me in a call the other day and it was wild, and I cannot wait for you to experience that.
• 16:23
  Speaker 1: So expect.
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: Her interview is coming and she is creating a custom track for us behind the subscription content.
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: So so exciting $5 a month.
• 16:32
  Speaker 1: Hit me up, tell me what you think, tell me what tracks you'd like me to create for you.
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: Right, that's what I want to know.
• 16:37
  Speaker 1: What do you wish that there was a guided meditation or sleep meditation to address?
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: What would you specifically like to hear me target to help you heal while you're asleep?
• 16:47
  Speaker 1: I love you so much Peace.