Latest / Northern Quarter Talks / Find Your Way Back to Yourself | Aimie Skillen

Transcript

Find Your Way Back to Yourself | Aimie Skillen · Northern Quarter Talks

• 0:00
  Aimie Skillen: I remember back in January, I was really not in a good place.
• 0:03
  Aimie Skillen: I remember just being like, oh, something else is still missing.
• 0:05
  Aimie Skillen: And it was the community.
• 0:07
  Aimie Skillen: I missed Feel Good Club.
• 0:08
  Aimie Skillen: Feel Good Club is a lifestyle brand.
• 0:10
  Aimie Skillen: The tagline and the goal behind Feel Good Club has been and always will be.
• 0:14
  Aimie Skillen: We just wanted to make one person feel good.
• 0:16
  Aimie Skillen: That's a really good question.
• 0:17
  Aimie Skillen: I think there's a big difference between an audience and a community.
• 0:20
  Aimie Skillen: An audience will like your post, not like your post, they'll dip in and out.
• 0:23
  Aimie Skillen: But to pause for eight months and people to be like, we're back, you're back, we're back.
• 0:28
  Aimie Skillen: The title is When Your Life Looks Good on Paper But Something Feels Wrong.
• 0:33
  Aimie Skillen: And my key messaging behind that is.
• 0:36
  Simran Whitham: Well, I could not think of anyone better suited.
• 0:38
  Simran Whitham: This was founded for Mancs, and what better way than to end it with a manc?
• 0:43
  Aimie Skillen: My biggest fear is not.
• 0:50
  Title: This is the TEDxNorthernQuarter podcast.
• 0:55
  Simran Whitham: Amy Skillen, founder of Feel Good Club, Proud Mancunion, and future TEDxNorthernQuarter speaker.
• 1:04
  Simran Whitham: Welcome to the TEDx and Talks podcast by TEDx Northern Quarter.
• 1:09
  Simran Whitham: How are you feeling today?
• 1:11
  Aimie Skillen: Thanks for having me, Simran.
• 1:12
  Aimie Skillen: Can you guess how I'm feeling?
• 1:14
  Simran Whitham: I would like to say that maybe, maybe feeling good.
• 1:20
  Andy Coley: And maybe a little bit nervous because I don't know what's happening in a few weeks' time.
• 1:24
  Aimie Skillen: A lot of mixed emotions, but there's always a level of feeling good, as you will obviously guess.
• 1:28
  Aimie Skillen: But yeah, I'm feeling I'm feeling a lot of emotions.
• 1:32
  Aimie Skillen: Every time I open my eyes at the moment, I'm like, oh my god, I'm excited, nervous, anxious, overwhelmed.
• 1:36
  Aimie Skillen: Oh my god.
• 1:37
  Aimie Skillen: But yeah, I'm really excited, and thank you for having me on the podcast and on the TEDx stage.
• 1:42
  Andy Coley: No.
• 1:42
  Andy Coley: It's such an interesting thing, isn't it?
• 1:44
  Andy Coley: That whole perception of doing a TEDx.
• 1:46
  Andy Coley: What was it like when you got the call from us to say, oh, you know, please would you come on to the TEDx stage and and work with us?
• 1:54
  Simran Whitham: Well, I think I can answer that one because I I I messed with Amy when I rang you to tell you that.
• 1:58
  Simran Whitham: Like I remember the day that you got a million LinkedIn messages and probably an email from me because I was sure you didn't check LinkedIn.
• 2:05
  Simran Whitham: You probably thought, Who is this madman like messaging me across everything?
• 2:09
  Simran Whitham: But yeah, what was it?
• 2:10
  Simran Whitham: What was it like that day I called you to tell you the news?
• 2:13
  Aimie Skillen: I remember sitting in the dining room and I remember you reaching out to me and being like, Do you want to jump on a call?
• 2:17
  Aimie Skillen: And I was like, No, because no, I don't want to do it because I'm too scared.
• 2:21
  Aimie Skillen: But Future Aimie was gonna jump on this call.
• 2:24
  Aimie Skillen: And I remember jumping on the call with you, and you was we had such a good chat, and uh you was like, Yeah, yeah, I'll let you know tomorrow.
• 2:30
  Aimie Skillen: And I was like, Okay, never slept all night.
• 2:32
  Aimie Skillen: And then woke up the next day, you rang me and you was like, Oh, I'm really, I'm really sorry to tell you, mate, but um you're gonna have to come stand on that stage.
• 2:40
  Aimie Skillen: I was like, Oh my god, and I burst out crying.
• 2:44
  Aimie Skillen: Um, it means so much to me.
• 2:46
  Aimie Skillen: This isn't just a obviously it's not just to talk to anybody, but it's it's so much bigger than me at the moment.
• 2:51
  Aimie Skillen: I've always been so scared of public speaking.
• 2:54
  Aimie Skillen: Um, it's always been something that's absolutely petrified me.
• 2:56
  Aimie Skillen: So this is a real full circle, literally a red full circle moment for me.
• 3:00
  Aimie Skillen: So yeah, it's it's it's for future email, why how I'm doing why I'm doing it.
• 3:05
  Andy Coley: Awesome.
• 3:05
  Andy Coley: And and of course, you are actually the last speaker on the red dot during our event.
• 3:09
  Andy Coley: What's that like?
• 3:10
  Aimie Skillen: You've been playing with me ever since that call, haven't you?
• 3:13
  Simran Whitham: We had our speakers' call last week where we sat down with all of you and revealed the running order of the day.
• 3:18
  Simran Whitham: And how does it feel to know that you're gonna be the last one that people hear on the day?
• 3:24
  Aimie Skillen: Cheers, guys, as always.
• 3:25
  Aimie Skillen: Thanks again.
• 3:26
  Aimie Skillen: Always playing with me.
• 3:27
  Aimie Skillen: Um, I remember being on that Zoom call and like everyone's name and faces kept popping up, and I was like, okay, yeah, okay.
• 3:33
  Aimie Skillen: It's gonna be coming soon, please.
• 3:35
  Aimie Skillen: After break, yeah, cool.
• 3:36
  Aimie Skillen: This is so and then nope, and then there was the last two faces, and I was like, I just know what's coming.
• 3:41
  Aimie Skillen: Um, but yeah, thank you so much.
• 3:44
  Aimie Skillen: Obviously, it means a lot.
• 3:45
  Aimie Skillen: It shows how much, how much you back me.
• 3:49
  Aimie Skillen: Yeah, how much you believe in me.
• 3:50
  Aimie Skillen: So thank you both so much.
• 3:51
  Aimie Skillen: But yeah, I'm petrified.
• 3:53
  Aimie Skillen: So yeah, thanks again.
• 3:54
  Aimie Skillen: But I hope I can uh I hope I know I'm going to do it justice.
• 3:57
  Aimie Skillen: I want people to walk out of that room, leaving behind of like questioning how they go through life.
• 4:03
  Aimie Skillen: So yeah, I think it's gonna be the perfect ending.
• 4:05
  Simran Whitham: Well, I could not think of anyone better suited.
• 4:07
  Simran Whitham: This was founded for mancs, and what better way than to end it with a manc?
• 4:12
  Aimie Skillen: Thank you so much.
• 4:13
  Aimie Skillen: When you said, I was like, Simran, why me?
• 4:15
  Aimie Skillen: You was like, I wanted a true manc.
• 4:17
  Aimie Skillen: I was like, yes.
• 4:18
  Simran Whitham: I mean, you are true, you're you're as manc as you get.
• 4:20
  Simran Whitham: You you got that proud Salford accent.
• 4:23
  Aimie Skillen: But that is why I've been always so petrified of public speaking in my life.
• 4:27
  Aimie Skillen: I always thought my accent would stop me from achieving.
• 4:30
  Aimie Skillen: So to it really was like a oh okay, when you said we've chosen you because we also want a real manc on there.
• 4:37
  Aimie Skillen: I was like, this is meant for me, so I've got to go and do it.
• 4:39
  Simran Whitham: And you've been an A-star student.
• 4:41
  Simran Whitham: We had actually our speaker coach's feedback for our speakers, didn't we?
• 4:45
  Simran Whitham: Recently, Andy, and when Steve Payne sent us his feedback for his speakers, typically how it works is the longer the message, the more feedback there is.
• 4:54
  Simran Whitham: You had two lines, and it was Amy has been an A Star student, not worried.
• 4:58
  Andy Coley: Yeah.
• 4:58
  Andy Coley: And of course, you post a lot on Instagram with uh this is what I'm watching, this is what I'm prepping, this is what I'm doing.
• 5:04
  Aimie Skillen: Yes, I just wanted to.
• 5:05
  Aimie Skillen: It's such an incredible experience.
• 5:08
  Aimie Skillen: What you guys have like set up is absolutely amazing.
• 5:10
  Aimie Skillen: And I thought, you know what?
• 5:11
  Aimie Skillen: I'm just gonna throw myself out into it.
• 5:13
  Aimie Skillen: I just want to give it my everything and also give you guys back and Steve back because the time and the effort that you guys are putting into us, I wanted to give that back.
• 5:22
  Aimie Skillen: And I I believe that is how you build a community, that's how you but all everybody thrives when you give and they give.
• 5:28
  Aimie Skillen: So, yeah, Steve is Steve's my guy.
• 5:30
  Aimie Skillen: Steve sees me every single day.
• 5:32
  Andy Coley: Let's talk a little bit more about that community.
• 5:34
  Andy Coley: You keep talking about feeling good.
• 5:35
  Andy Coley: Um, so you run the Field Good Club.
• 5:37
  Aimie Skillen: I do.
• 5:38
  Andy Coley: What is that as a concept, as a community, as a a place to be at, or what has it meant, you know, getting it to where it is now as that sort of I guess brand?
• 5:49
  Aimie Skillen: Brand, yeah.
• 5:50
  Aimie Skillen: Feel good club is a lifestyle brand.
• 5:52
  Aimie Skillen: It started off as just a simple idea.
• 5:56
  Aimie Skillen: Um, me and my partner at the time, we wanted to make people feel good.
• 5:59
  Aimie Skillen: The tagline and the goal behind Fielga Club has been and always will be.
• 6:04
  Aimie Skillen: We just wanted to make one person feel good.
• 6:06
  Aimie Skillen: There was no strategy, no business plan.
• 6:07
  Aimie Skillen: It was just we want to make people feel good.
• 6:09
  Aimie Skillen: We started it with our Instagram, um, putting out really cheesy quotes back then, to be honest, about seven, eight years ago.
• 6:16
  Aimie Skillen: Um, and we started selling t-shirts online.
• 6:18
  Aimie Skillen: And the concept behind the t-shirts was simple.
• 6:20
  Aimie Skillen: If you saw someone wearing Feel Good Club, you'd know that that person was like open to conversations, open to connect.
• 6:25
  Aimie Skillen: Um and yeah, it just started blowing up and it's turned into things that I could never imagine.
• 6:31
  Aimie Skillen: It's been podcasts, events, books, billboards, brand activations, coffee shops, nightclubs.
• 6:36
  Aimie Skillen: It's been club nights, it's been all sorts of things since then.
• 6:40
  Aimie Skillen: So it has gone above and beyond what I ever expected.
• 6:43
  Simran Whitham: And it's been amazing as a manc to see that because I was there, I was at uni when it used first started.
• 6:49
  Simran Whitham: I remember it just blowing up overnight.
• 6:51
  Simran Whitham: It was literally like an overnight just takeover of the city.
• 6:55
  Simran Whitham: I remember seeing Stephen Bartlett when he used to run social chain sharing, and that's how I discovered it.
• 7:00
  Simran Whitham: And I started seeing the billboards, and I went to the I used to work in the coffee shop.
• 7:03
  Simran Whitham: I used to go do my uni work in the coffee shop.
• 7:05
  Simran Whitham: Oh, thanks.
• 7:06
  Simran Whitham: Before I before this whole week, and this is why I'm a firm believer in always be nice to everyone you ever meet because you never know who that person's gonna be.
• 7:12
  Simran Whitham: Who'd have thought that the lady I used to see walking around holding a laptop with a little dog following you throughout the laptop would be on a TED stage for me one day.
• 7:19
  Simran Whitham: I didn't even know, I didn't even think I'd ever run a TED conference app one day.
• 7:22
  Simran Whitham: But it's just mad how the world works.
• 7:24
  Simran Whitham: I remember just that amazing environment you created for creatives, and it felt so inclusive and just all these different types of people.
• 7:31
  Simran Whitham: And it was very quirky, it was I was very productive.
• 7:33
  Simran Whitham: It was literally like full-blown lo-fi hip-hop girl vibes in there.
• 7:36
  Simran Whitham: Like you got I got so much of my uni work done in that coffee shop.
• 7:40
  Aimie Skillen: Thank you so much.
• 7:41
  Aimie Skillen: Like, that means a lot.
• 7:42
  Aimie Skillen: Like when we opened the coffee shop, we never wanted it to be like the best coffee, the best food, the best events.
• 7:47
  Aimie Skillen: We was never trying to be the best of anything, we just always described the feeling we wanted it to create.
• 7:53
  Aimie Skillen: The first video that we ever put out there was like, uh, it's gonna be your home from home.
• 7:58
  Aimie Skillen: And that was always the thing that we wanted to create.
• 7:59
  Aimie Skillen: We wanted to create people walked in and just felt good in there.
• 8:03
  Aimie Skillen: Like, and whatever that looked like for you, if you were a creative, if if you wanted to bring your friends, your family, you wanted to come take a date there, like we just wanted people to feel good.
• 8:12
  Aimie Skillen: So, yeah, hearing that is like a tick, that's exactly what we wanted to achieve.
• 8:16
  Aimie Skillen: So, thanks for that.
• 8:17
  Andy Coley: No, you're welcome, mate.
• 8:18
  Andy Coley: And I guess to dive a little bit deeper on that, because you talk about yeah, always feeling good or generally feeling good, and you open that with your ex-partner.
• 8:26
  Andy Coley: So there's also been days and challenges and things that you would have faced personally, yeah.
• 8:31
  Andy Coley: Working your way through that.
• 8:32
  Andy Coley: And how do you stay in control and you know, true to yourself during those times when things don't work out, when you know you do hit those roadblocks when you've got to dig deep and and be really resilient to what's going on?
• 8:46
  Andy Coley: Like, how do you cope when those days aren't always times when you want to feel good?
• 8:50
  Aimie Skillen: Do you know what?
• 8:51
  Aimie Skillen: I get asked that question quite a lot Like, does it always feel good?
• 8:53
  Aimie Skillen: How do you how do you always feel good?
• 8:55
  Aimie Skillen: I'm like, I don't, I don't always feel good.
• 8:57
  Aimie Skillen: The past, yeah, the past 18 months has been really difficult.
• 9:01
  Aimie Skillen: Like, obviously, like you said, me and my ex-wife ran the business.
• 9:04
  Aimie Skillen: We were also trying to go for the divorce, we were also trying to figure that out.
• 9:07
  Aimie Skillen: A team of 20, whilst we were going through that, having to close the coffee shop together whilst our marriage was ending, it's been really, really difficult.
• 9:14
  Aimie Skillen: And I've learned a lot.
• 9:15
  Aimie Skillen: I'm paused Feel Good Club for about eight months.
• 9:17
  Aimie Skillen: I still posted every day on the Instagram and stuff, but events and anything where I to show up, I paused because I just forgot who I was.
• 9:24
  Aimie Skillen: I got lost in it all, and I really wanted to fill my cup back up so I could give back to that community again.
• 9:29
  Aimie Skillen: And within that, a lot of the questions I kept asking myself is why?
• 9:32
  Aimie Skillen: Why do I do Feel Good Club?
• 9:34
  Aimie Skillen: And I do feel good because I love human connection, I love that feeling of like connecting with people.
• 9:39
  Aimie Skillen: So yeah, I think within that I learned to fill my cup up.
• 9:44
  Aimie Skillen: I started following things, it sounds really cheesy again because I'm gonna say the word and this word always comes out of my mouth.
• 9:48
  Aimie Skillen: I started following what makes me feel good, and that is a big majority of what my talk is about.
• 9:54
  Aimie Skillen: It's finding what makes you feel good.
• 9:56
  Aimie Skillen: I think if you can like now in that when I first wake up in the morning, my non-negotiable is the first hour is mine.
• 10:02
  Aimie Skillen: If that's moving my body, if that's running, if that's coffee in bed, if that's reading a book, if that's doing nothing, it doesn't matter what it is on that day.
• 10:09
  Aimie Skillen: What I need, I give myself before I go out and give to other people.
• 10:12
  Aimie Skillen: So yeah, it was really about digging deep and believing that I could turn up still, like no matter what that looked like.
• 10:19
  Aimie Skillen: And I think that's what field club represents.
• 10:21
  Aimie Skillen: To me, Field Good Club's Instagram is permission, it's permission to feel however you want to feel on however you're feeling that day, you still have to turn up, and that's okay.
• 10:30
  Aimie Skillen: If you've got 10%, just give 10% that day.
• 10:33
  Aimie Skillen: If you've got 100%, go wild that day.
• 10:35
  Aimie Skillen: But however you're turning up that day, it's okay.
• 10:38
  Aimie Skillen: And I think that's what I needed.
• 10:40
  Aimie Skillen: Feel good club during those tough times.
• 10:42
  Aimie Skillen: It reminded me of why I do it because I needed my own brand.
• 10:45
  Aimie Skillen: Does that answer your question, Andy?
• 10:47
  Andy Coley: Yeah.
• 10:49
  Simran Whitham: And I think also with Feel Good Club, it's opened the door for you to open the conversation of allowing people to admit when they're not feeling good as well.
• 10:57
  Simran Whitham: Why do you feel like it's important for people to admit when they're not feeling good as well as embracing people to feel good as well?
• 11:04
  Aimie Skillen: I think, especially now in society on social media, like don't I love social media, it's where my business is obviously, so I love it.
• 11:11
  Aimie Skillen: Um, but I think it's really important to remember that we only see people's best bits.
• 11:15
  Aimie Skillen: Like, and not ever it's impossible for everyone every single day to have a good day.
• 11:20
  Aimie Skillen: But we do say it's like you don't say, Come spend a day with me when it's a Sunday and all you're doing is line on so forth to TV.
• 11:26
  Aimie Skillen: You're gonna do a come spend a day with me when you're on a podcast, when you're having a nice coffee, when you're meeting your friends, when you're going for a run.
• 11:31
  Aimie Skillen: So for me, Feel Good Club really represents a mix of that.
• 11:34
  Aimie Skillen: I want that page to be a mix of positive, positivity, permission, community, like the good days, the bad days.
• 11:41
  Aimie Skillen: Like we all have them.
• 11:42
  Aimie Skillen: So I just want to keep reiterating that it's okay to turn up however you turn up, and it's okay to not feel good all the time.
• 11:49
  Simran Whitham: And I really resonate with that because we're both some of that.
• 11:52
  Simran Whitham: We've both built community-based businesses, we both do community activations, and that takes the forms of events, talks, panels, you do your little runs, and it is that community that gets you through those days.
• 12:05
  Simran Whitham: Like you have to uh we get this as entrepreneurs, like we can feel we have good and bad days.
• 12:10
  Simran Whitham: We don't show those bits though.
• 12:11
  Simran Whitham: We don't show the 11 pm where you're banging your head against the wall and going, I want to give up.
• 12:16
  Aimie Skillen: Why did I start this?
• 12:18
  Simran Whitham: Or or just when you feel like shit.
• 12:19
  Simran Whitham: People think that business owners are indestructible, but you've been so transparent in that journey saying, Listen, I felt like shit when that whole thing was happening, and we go through that, and I think what you've really done is you've owned that because especially you say about social media, we we're living in the phase currently of the authentic influencer, I like to call it, where everyone is authentic.
• 12:40
  Simran Whitham: Yes.
• 12:40
  Simran Whitham: Whereas I feel like you actually just are yourself because the fact you admit the good, the bad, and the ugly.
• 12:46
  Aimie Skillen: Thank you.
• 12:46
  Aimie Skillen: And yeah, that's exactly what I try and achieve.
• 12:49
  Aimie Skillen: I remember back in January, I was really not in a good place.
• 12:52
  Aimie Skillen: And I remember being like, Oh, like I just need to I need to do something, I need to shift it.
• 12:56
  Aimie Skillen: Like I kept trying to do things myself, like going for runs and moving my body, ice baths, everything else.
• 13:01
  Aimie Skillen: I remember just being like, Oh, something else is still missing.
• 13:04
  Aimie Skillen: And it was the community, I missed Feel Good Club, but I knew I wasn't ready to turn up fully because I wasn't I wasn't mentally prepared for that.
• 13:11
  Aimie Skillen: Yeah, and in January, I just put on the store.
• 13:13
  Aimie Skillen: I'm going for a walk today in Monton in the woods.
• 13:15
  Aimie Skillen: Does anybody want to join me?
• 13:16
  Aimie Skillen: And like two people turned up.
• 13:18
  Aimie Skillen: And I remember at first being like, Oh, have I failed?
• 13:21
  Aimie Skillen: Is it a bit of a flop?
• 13:22
  Aimie Skillen: Is the community all gone?
• 13:23
  Aimie Skillen: Because just two people turned up.
• 13:25
  Aimie Skillen: But on that walk, those two people made me feel so good, and I made them feel really good.
• 13:30
  Aimie Skillen: And that's what a community is.
• 13:31
  Aimie Skillen: I paused for eight months, and I just kept getting messages after messages after my after the followers saying, like, don't rush, we're still here, we'll still be here.
• 13:40
  Aimie Skillen: And I was like, That's really nice, but are you gonna be there?
• 13:43
  Aimie Skillen: And last month I put the first ever feel good club back event on after eight months, and it sold out in 24 hours.
• 13:49
  Aimie Skillen: And I was like, like it meant the world to me.
• 13:53
  Aimie Skillen: Like, I paused it for eight months, and that community still showed up.
• 13:56
  Aimie Skillen: That to me is a community.
• 13:58
  Aimie Skillen: I think there's a big difference between an audience and a community.
• 14:00
  Aimie Skillen: An audience will like your post, not like your post, they'll dip in and out.
• 14:04
  Aimie Skillen: But to pause for eight months and people to be like, We're back, you're back, we're back, it's a give and take thing a community.
• 14:11
  Aimie Skillen: They I've turned up for them and they've turned up for me, and I think that's what the big the big difference is.
• 14:16
  Simran Whitham: And as a side question off the back of that, is this is just a little sidewalk what I ask you around the brand of Feel Good Club because you've been running it for eight years now.
• 14:24
  Simran Whitham: If you had to pinpoint one or two points, what is it that you think most people in society today that you found from running Feel Good Club when you do these activations or they come to you?
• 14:33
  Simran Whitham: What do you find is the most common denominator of people not feeling good today that you feel like Feel Good Club has helped people overcome, or something that society needs to change to help a society feel more good overall?
• 14:46
  Simran Whitham: Has there been a particular problem that you feel most people feel, or do you feel like it's too broad to even be able to answer that?
• 14:53
  Aimie Skillen: No, I think that's a really good question.
• 14:55
  Aimie Skillen: Um I think the main thing when I'm doing these events, these activations, you know, workshops, panel talks, it's always coming at the moment down to loneliness.
• 15:05
  Aimie Skillen: I think people are lonely.
• 15:06
  Aimie Skillen: I think people are forgotten, like not forgotten.
• 15:08
  Aimie Skillen: It's hard now to go and make friends.
• 15:10
  Aimie Skillen: I find it, I find it hard to make friends.
• 15:12
  Aimie Skillen: Yeah.
• 15:12
  Aimie Skillen: No matter what age you're at, I think everyone is so busy building careers, their own lives, their family lives.
• 15:19
  Aimie Skillen: Everything's go, go, go where we feel like we don't have enough time, but we do have enough time.
• 15:24
  Aimie Skillen: It's just how we're filling our time.
• 15:25
  Aimie Skillen: And every time I go to these events, they're like, oh, thank you so much.
• 15:28
  Aimie Skillen: Because I've just met this person and we're gonna like connect now.
• 15:31
  Aimie Skillen: And it's creating that space where people are allowed to turn up for themselves, they're allowed to turn up alone.
• 15:37
  Aimie Skillen: And I can guarantee 90% of those people at those events every single time will not leave alone.
• 15:43
  Aimie Skillen: Yeah, and it's because people want it, but there's just not enough spaces, I don't think, in society right now to unless it's a run club, everyone's doing a run club, right?
• 15:51
  Aimie Skillen: Mine's a walk club because I was like, not everybody wants to run, and I don't want to put pressure and pace on people.
• 15:55
  Aimie Skillen: Yeah, I have now sat, I have now applied for a half marathon, so uh that's gonna change.
• 16:00
  Aimie Skillen: Um, but yeah, I think once we create those spaces, people will turn up because people are lonely and they do want it.
• 16:05
  Aimie Skillen: So I think the answer to that is yeah, loneliness.
• 16:08
  Aimie Skillen: I think it's a really a really big thing at the moment.
• 16:12
  Simran Whitham: It is, it's what I chose to talk about on the TED stage, and I see it through my work.
• 16:16
  Simran Whitham: I mean, I I work in one of the most introverted industries on the planet, but even introverts will come out for events because they're all craving it.
• 16:23
  Simran Whitham: Like I've it's this real horrible epidemic that we all need this technology and all these things that are separating us from people to function on a day-to-day, but we crave what it's taken away from us, and it's this horrible double-edged sword that we've created, which is why I think conversations like this, events in particular, like TEDx, like what you do are so important to help people reclaim that in the day-to-day lives, because we all need a tribe, even the most introverted person needs someone in their lives.
• 16:52
  Aimie Skillen: Completely agree with you, and I'd like to think if people go on that Instagram page for Field Good Club, it's exactly that.
• 16:57
  Aimie Skillen: It's the double-edged sword, it's the social media, it's the spend the day with me, it's the seeing the fun events, but it's also the it's okay to have a crap date today.
• 17:05
  Aimie Skillen: Like, I really am, I really do try and make it a mix of all that because that is how that's what the world we're living in now, and I don't want it to be all rainbows and butterflies because it's not.
• 17:14
  Andy Coley: You can't have the yin without the yang.
• 17:15
  Andy Coley: Exactly that.
• 17:16
  Andy Coley: Although although you you you really have something against Mondays.
• 17:20
  Andy Coley: Every Sunday, it's like, don't worry about your Monday tomorrow.
• 17:22
  Andy Coley: Your Monday might be shit, but it's okay.
• 17:25
  Andy Coley: This is 10 tips to pick up on a Monday.
• 17:28
  Aimie Skillen: I did a post recently actually when I saw your comment because I was like, Mondays are great.
• 17:32
  Aimie Skillen: I love Mondays after seeing your comment.
• 17:34
  Aimie Skillen: But tell me you've not every single person on this planet has dealt with the Sunday Scaries at one point in their lives.
• 17:39
  Simran Whitham: I just came back from holiday on Sunday and I had to go back to first day of Monday, and I was like, and and I was like, Oh, I love my job, don't get wrong.
• 17:46
  Simran Whitham: But yesterday it got to like 4 p.m.
• 17:48
  Simran Whitham: and I was like, I should have booked the day off.
• 17:51
  Andy Coley: That's not that's not Monday's fault, that's just because it's it's the day after you got back.
• 17:54
  Andy Coley: And I appreciate a lot of people are in jobs because then they have a weekend and we've got this whole social construct around a weekend and a weekday.
• 18:00
  Andy Coley: I I get it.
• 18:01
  Aimie Skillen: Do you know what?
• 18:01
  Aimie Skillen: Sunday evening reminders is our like most famous, most famous posts.
• 18:05
  Andy Coley: I bet.
• 18:06
  Aimie Skillen: Yeah, so I'll do Monday reminders for you, Andy.
• 18:09
  Simran Whitham: Just for just for Andy.
• 18:10
  Aimie Skillen: Yeah.
• 18:10
  Andy Coley: So uh you're talking about people getting together and the community and that that that opportunity to just connect and to talk.
• 18:18
  Andy Coley: What do you think like society would benefit from if people could talk about how they are feeling more?
• 18:24
  Andy Coley: Like, what do you think what would you love to be the legacy of Feel Good Club or from your work or from your Instagram posts or from just watching your TEDx talk in terms of our ability to be able to better connect to other people?
• 18:37
  Andy Coley: Because I feel that we do hide ourselves away, we do sit with an imposter syndrome, we do worry about our accent, our size, our sexuality, or whatever that we think people will hold against us.
• 18:49
  Andy Coley: I what do you wish people would have those just not necessarily deep conversations, but just conversations about with other people to create a connection?
• 18:59
  Aimie Skillen: I wish we knew more it's okay to turn up exactly as you are.
• 19:05
  Aimie Skillen: I think that's it.
• 19:06
  Aimie Skillen: Your sexuality, your background, your career, what like I think and I've been, I definitely do.
• 19:12
  Aimie Skillen: I think a lot of us at one point in our lives get scared to just turn up as we are.
• 19:16
  Aimie Skillen: Like as soon as Feel Good Club started blowing up, as soon as the people started, as soon as the brand activation started, that there was the Feel Good Club pressure.
• 19:22
  Aimie Skillen: I've now got to be 'Miss Feel Good' and I wasn't feeling good.
• 19:25
  Aimie Skillen: I was going for a big change in my life and I wasn't feeling good.
• 19:28
  Aimie Skillen: And now I've really learned that like it's okay to be me.
• 19:32
  Aimie Skillen: Now, however, like I am Feel Good Club.
• 19:34
  Aimie Skillen: So if I turn up at this podcast today and I don't feel good club today and I feel overwhelmed and flat, I'm just gonna try and give it my all because I am Feel good Club.
• 19:42
  Aimie Skillen: I think it's really scary at the moment's sides that just to turn up as you are, and I know it sounds really simple to say, but like there's only one of you.
• 19:49
  Aimie Skillen: There's literally one of you.
• 19:51
  Aimie Skillen: Like, it is incredible that there is only one of you.
• 19:53
  Aimie Skillen: So turn up into this world, like just being you, and don't be scared of everybody else.
• 19:58
  Aimie Skillen: Like, everyone's just doing that.
• 19:59
  Aimie Skillen: Somebody once said to me, nobody actually cares.
• 20:02
  Aimie Skillen: Yeah, and when I found when I said that, I was like, that is so like nobody cares if you're going on the internet and talking, nobody cares if you're running, nobody cares if you're eating well, nobody cares if you're divorced, married, nobody actually cares because all each everyone cares about is themselves.
• 20:16
  Simran Whitham: Yeah, we're all the protagonists of our main story, and we often forget that people are actually just living their own book and their own story.
• 20:25
  Simran Whitham: Is that good?
• 20:26
  Simran Whitham: And you're just a secondary character in other people's story, but because we're the main protagonists of our story, we almost think every other character in it is paying attention to us.
• 20:34
  Simran Whitham: Yeah.
• 20:35
  Aimie Skillen: And going back to your question, that's exactly it what I was gonna say.
• 20:38
  Aimie Skillen: If you turn up the way exactly who you are, you will find people who love you for who you are.
• 20:43
  Aimie Skillen: Yeah.
• 20:43
  Aimie Skillen: And that's connection.
• 20:44
  Aimie Skillen: Like if I turned to Field Club and I was actually just a really miserable human being and I didn't really care about community or people or mental health, yeah, people wouldn't connect with it.
• 20:52
  Aimie Skillen: Yeah, it's because I am who I am, and my personality is exactly that.
• 20:56
  Aimie Skillen: It's all it's authentic because I'm running.
• 20:58
  Aimie Skillen: People turn up for it because and the right people turn up for it, and that's how built how you build a community.
• 21:05
  Simran Whitham: Agree.
• 21:05
  Simran Whitham: You're missing the matcha when you say authentic, though.
• 21:07
  Simran Whitham: You know, you need you need your matcha with a million syrups in to be authentic these days.
• 21:12
  Simran Whitham: Do you know I tried my first ever matcha before I went to Scotland?
• 21:18
  Simran Whitham: So, do you know Get Baked Northern Quarter?
• 21:21
  Aimie Skillen: Love Get Baked.
• 21:22
  Simran Whitham: Right.
• 21:22
  Simran Whitham: I'm milkshake man, I love a milkshake.
• 21:24
  Simran Whitham: The cinnamon swirl one is incredible.
• 21:26
  Simran Whitham: I love cinnamon rolls, but that was my first ever matcha experience.
• 21:30
  Aimie Skillen: Go on.
• 21:30
  Simran Whitham: I hated it.
• 21:31
  Simran Whitham: I and it's no no disrespect to get baked.
• 21:34
  Simran Whitham: Love what you're doing, love the cinnamon one.
• 21:36
  Simran Whitham: It tasted vile.
• 21:37
  Simran Whitham: Matcha.
• 21:39
  Aimie Skillen: Does it taste like grass?
• 21:40
  Simran Whitham: It's grass, it's awful.
• 21:41
  Simran Whitham: Get over it.
• 21:42
  Simran Whitham: No, I don't want to get over it.
• 21:43
  Simran Whitham: I was more angry at the first time.
• 21:45
  Andy Coley: How do you feel good if your taste buds don't?
• 21:47
  Simran Whitham: Do you know what?
• 21:47
  Simran Whitham: I was angrier that I didn't stick to my comfort zone and just get my cinnamon.
• 21:51
  Simran Whitham: I braved, I did something different.
• 21:53
  Simran Whitham: I tried matcha, but do you know what?
• 21:54
  Simran Whitham: From that, I learned I don't like matcha.
• 21:56
  Simran Whitham: And that's me being authentic.
• 21:59
  Simran Whitham: That exactly openly admitting.
• 22:01
  Simran Whitham: I love Get Baked, but it's not for me
• 22:02
  Aimie Skillen: Turn up as you are.
• 22:03
  Aimie Skillen: Turn up as you are.
• 22:04
  Aimie Skillen: You want that cinnamon bun.
• 22:05
  Aimie Skillen: Don't have anything else.
• 22:07
  Andy Coley: Yeah.
• 22:07
  Andy Coley: I love cinnamon buns.
• 22:08
  Andy Coley: Getting back to that point, one of our masterclass coaches for the speakers, Andrew Eggleton, talks about that.
• 22:14
  Aimie Skillen: He was amazing.
• 22:15
  Aimie Skillen: I absolutely loved his masterclass.
• 22:16
  Simran Whitham: You were hooked
• 22:17
  Andy Coley: not putting the mask on and stepping onto that stage in the energy in which you are in right now.
• 22:24
  Andy Coley: And I think that's so important to people to remember is that the talks aren't performative, the talks are you.
• 22:30
  Andy Coley: And as soon as you step into a mask or a such a thing that could some speakers be so over-rehearsed that they just end up becoming like automatons on stage.
• 22:39
  Aimie Skillen: 100%.
• 22:40
  Andy Coley: You've got to be you, because that's what they're that's what the audience will really connect with.
• 22:43
  Andy Coley: I'm sure that's what we'll see from you as the last person up on stage.
• 22:48
  Aimie Skillen: Hopefully, by then I know who I am, and I'm gonna go on stage as I am, being the last one.
• 22:52
  Aimie Skillen: But that masterclass, can I just say, like that was like a light bulb moment.
• 22:56
  Aimie Skillen: My mind shifted after that masterclass.
• 22:58
  Aimie Skillen: I was and I still am petrified.
• 23:00
  Aimie Skillen: But after that, I remember putting the the laptop down the day and being like, Oh yeah, I've just got to be me.
• 23:06
  Aimie Skillen: That is literally, I've just got to be me.
• 23:08
  Aimie Skillen: And really hit home on like however you're feeling on the day, you've just got to turn up for yourself.
• 23:13
  Aimie Skillen: And every single time I'm doing my rehearsals in my head or in the mirror, and I'm getting anxious about it, I'm like, I've just got to be me.
• 23:20
  Aimie Skillen: And it's really, really helped.
• 23:21
  Aimie Skillen: So thanks, guys.
• 23:22
  Aimie Skillen: That was a really good master class.
• 23:24
  Simran Whitham: And for your TED talk, walk us through what is the title of it, but most importantly, what is the core idea worth spreading that you want audiences to leave with on September 11th?
• 23:35
  Simran Whitham: And how do you want, as everyone gets up from their seats to clap and they all get ready to leave that day because you're the last speaker?
• 23:42
  Simran Whitham: What is it that you want them to feel?
• 23:46
  Simran Whitham: Or is it simply just feeling good?
• 23:48
  Simran Whitham: How do you want them to feel?
• 23:50
  Aimie Skillen: Do you know what I'm gonna take the audience on a roller coaster because that's exactly what Feel Good Club does, right?
• 23:54
  Aimie Skillen: It's exactly what we've been talking about.
• 23:56
  Aimie Skillen: It's permission to feel feel however you're feeling.
• 23:58
  Aimie Skillen: And I'm gonna take the audience on a real a real ups and downs of my my journey with Feel Good Club, the good days and the bad days, because that's exactly what the brand's about.
• 24:08
  Aimie Skillen: The title is When Your Life Looks Good on Paper, but something feels wrong.
• 24:13
  Aimie Skillen: And my key messaging behind that is following what makes you feel good through your people, your places, and your things is the key messaging.
• 24:20
  Aimie Skillen: And the main thing I want to remind people is it's okay to lose yourself, but don't ever forget you can always find your way back to yourself.
• 24:29
  Andy Coley: Awesome, fantastic.
• 24:30
  Aimie Skillen: And that's how that's as much as I'm giving you.
• 24:32
  Aimie Skillen: Yeah, you're gonna have to turn up, you're gonna have to get a ticket and turn up to find out the rest.
• 24:36
  Simran Whitham: And do we still need to buy our tickets?
• 24:37
  Simran Whitham: Do that, haven't we?
• 24:39
  Aimie Skillen: I need to buy a ticket.
• 24:42
  Simran Whitham: You got your special speaker spots.
• 24:43
  Simran Whitham: Yeah, you'd have.
• 24:44
  Simran Whitham: And we could and I just gotta shout out to Martine.
• 24:46
  Simran Whitham: We've got to do shout out to Amy's mum Martine, who's been in all the Instagram likes that Martine's at.
• 24:52
  Simran Whitham: I just want Martine there.
• 24:54
  Simran Whitham: I just I want to meet the amazing woman that produced Amy Skillen.
• 24:58
  Aimie Skillen: Stop it, stop it.
• 24:59
  Aimie Skillen: Honestly, I am I am her, I really am.
• 25:02
  Simran Whitham: What's your family's reaction been to it?
• 25:03
  Simran Whitham: Because they seem so supportive of you throughout this whole thing.
• 25:06
  Simran Whitham: Uh I know you've said that your plans to go get absolutely shit -faced after it's all done, but like, what's your family's whole reaction to this whole process been for you?
• 25:16
  Aimie Skillen: Do you know what?
• 25:17
  Aimie Skillen: She is a legend.
• 25:18
  Aimie Skillen: My dad's a legend as well, but Martine Skillen is like like no other.
• 25:22
  Aimie Skillen: Throughout my whole life, she has been that person.
• 25:24
  Aimie Skillen: My uncle at 11 told me that I'd said to her once, I'd never go far in life because of my accent.
• 25:30
  Aimie Skillen: And my mum said a word back to him that I can't say on a live podcast.
• 25:34
  Aimie Skillen: Um, and from then that day on, I was like, You've got my back, you've got me.
• 25:38
  Aimie Skillen: And she got me through high school, she's pushed me through university.
• 25:41
  Aimie Skillen: I worked for my mum and dad, and I quit my nine to five job to start Feel Good Club, and she backed me.
• 25:46
  Aimie Skillen: When we had opened the coffee shop and we got uh went through COVID, she turned up every weekend and helped us make coffee.
• 25:52
  Aimie Skillen: She baked cheese and onion pies to sell.
• 25:54
  Aimie Skillen: She's got me through everything, closing the coffee shop, through divorce.
• 25:58
  Aimie Skillen: I've moved back in with her now.
• 26:00
  Aimie Skillen: Thanks, Martine and Andrew.
• 26:01
  Aimie Skillen: Um, she has always been my rock.
• 26:04
  Aimie Skillen: Um, so yeah, first off, thanks, Mum.
• 26:06
  Aimie Skillen: And I always remember when we first started Feel Good Club, she came round and helped us to sew t-shirts, like learn us how to sew.
• 26:11
  Aimie Skillen: Um, so yeah, she's gonna be in that stage, and she's not stopped crying to be honest.
• 26:15
  Aimie Skillen: Um, but she yeah, she's she feels very, very proud.
• 26:18
  Aimie Skillen: Thank you very much.
• 26:19
  Simran Whitham: And I think that's a brilliant way to end it.
• 26:21
  Simran Whitham: Shout out to Martine.
• 26:22
  Aimie Skillen: Yes, Martine.
• 26:23
  Simran Whitham: But before we end today, Amy Skillen, we have a tradition on this podcast.
• 26:27
  Aimie Skillen: Right.
• 26:28
  Simran Whitham: Which is we have the Red Text Northern Quarter Journal.
• 26:31
  Simran Whitham: Where's Red?
• 26:33
  Aimie Skillen: Nice.
• 26:34
  Simran Whitham: At the end of every podcast, the previous guest leaves either a question, a thought, or an idea for the next guest to have to answer.
• 26:42
  Simran Whitham: Now the reason I'm pausing is holy shit, you might have to read this.
• 26:49
  Simran Whitham: I can't read that handwriting.
• 26:50
  Simran Whitham: Oh, oh wait, oh wait, oh no, no, no.
• 26:52
  Simran Whitham: Oh, yeah, I can dissect that.
• 26:53
  Simran Whitham: Asia man.
• 26:56
  Aimie Skillen: Oh, is it a really difficult one?
• 26:58
  Simran Whitham: Yeah, okay.
• 26:59
  Simran Whitham: Okay, cool.
• 27:00
  Simran Whitham: So the question that has been left for you is by one of our other TEDxNorthernQuarter 2026 speakers, award-winning software engineer, Asia Sharif.
• 27:12
  Simran Whitham: And the question she has left for you to ask and answer is what's your biggest fear?
• 27:25
  Aimie Skillen: What's my biggest fear?
• 27:27
  Aimie Skillen: My biggest fear is not ever reaching what the full Aimie could have been.
• 27:42
  Aimie Skillen: My biggest fear is getting in my own way throughout my life and coming to the end of it and being like, I stopped myself.
• 27:49
  Aimie Skillen: So my biggest fear is never achieving the full Aimie.
• 27:53
  Aimie Skillen: Does that make sense?
• 27:54
  Aimie Skillen: The full version of myself.
• 27:56
  Aimie Skillen: I never want to get in my I never want fear to stop me from being who I could have been.
• 28:02
  Aimie Skillen: Yeah, that's a good question.
• 28:04
  Aimie Skillen: And public speaking, but that's not fear no more.
• 28:08
  Simran Whitham: Shout out to Steve Payne.
• 28:10
  Andy Coley: Aimie Skillen, Thank you so much for joining us on the TEDx and Talks podcast.
• 28:13
  Aimie Skillen: Thank you for having me.
• 28:15
  Simran Whitham: Thank you.
• 28:16
  Title: This is the TEDxNorthernQuarter Podcast.