Latest / Be It Till You See It / 659. How to Build Focus and Attention in Children Naturally

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659. How to Build Focus and Attention in Children Naturally · Be It Till You See It

0:00
[SPEAKER_02]: listening to her stories, you know, she is intentional about giving people the tools, like you were just talking about the tools to develop as a child to grow into the adult that joins the the pack.
0:15
[SPEAKER_02]: Right, the society.
0:16
[SPEAKER_02]: Right.
0:17
[SPEAKER_02]: And when you are empowering them with the tools, then they can make decisions that are logical and all those kinds of things instead of just be like, I guess, like, like think about it.
0:27
[SPEAKER_02]: If you're just like, do it.
0:28
[SPEAKER_02]: Why?
0:29
[SPEAKER_02]: Because I said so what are you doing?
0:30
[SPEAKER_02]: You're actually molding a human to always be told what to do.
0:35
[SPEAKER_03]: Welcome to the Beat till you see it podcast, where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring.
0:42
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm also Logan, prize instructor, and fitness business coach.
0:45
[SPEAKER_03]: I've trained thousands of people around the world, and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt.
0:54
[SPEAKER_03]: My friends, action brings clarity, and it's the antidote to fear.
1:00
[SPEAKER_03]: Each week my guests will bring bold, executable, intrinsic, and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and be it till you see it.
1:10
[SPEAKER_03]: It's a practice, not a perfect, let's get started.
1:17
[SPEAKER_03]: Welcome back to the VTell you See in every recap where my co-hosts and life Brad and I are going to dig into the grounded combo I have with Gail Hugman.
1:25
[SPEAKER_02]: Hugmen.
1:25
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, that's right.
1:26
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm like, sorry, Gail.
1:27
[SPEAKER_03]: I know you're listening.
1:28
[SPEAKER_03]: But you know you're like, oh, all of a sudden, hold on.
1:30
[SPEAKER_03]: Did I miss a G, H, whatever.
1:32
[SPEAKER_03]: Bale Hugmen.
1:32
[SPEAKER_03]: She's stuck in the best.
1:34
[SPEAKER_03]: It was in our last episode.
1:35
[SPEAKER_02]: No.
1:35
[SPEAKER_02]: The two of you.
1:36
[SPEAKER_02]: So I listen everything on like two X-bead.
1:39
[SPEAKER_02]: And if I could probably try to listen to it on three X-bead.
1:42
[SPEAKER_02]: And the two of you were like, giggle monsters.
1:45
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm obsessed with her like I and I was like a when Brad will came up he was halfway through her interviewing is like this is amazing and I was like oh good because I did go for a second going
1:56
[SPEAKER_03]: about to like get all the parents to hate me out there.
1:59
[SPEAKER_03]: Like I don't want to be because here's a deal.
2:02
[SPEAKER_03]: I understand.
2:03
[SPEAKER_03]: I don't have children.
2:05
[SPEAKER_03]: I get that.
2:05
[SPEAKER_03]: I don't understand the day-to-day.
2:06
[SPEAKER_03]: I can't even imagine the cell phone conversation.
2:09
[SPEAKER_03]: My kids, I'll just tell you right now, here's where I'd be.
2:13
[SPEAKER_03]: They would hate us.
2:14
[SPEAKER_03]: They would have a flip phone with those heavy batteries, so big of a infant, their pocket, like no internet.
2:21
[SPEAKER_03]: you know like because there's so much research on like how it's like affecting people's ability to focus so like this interview to me was so amazing and we are buying all of her books for sorry Meredith and Kyle you're getting them all.
2:36
[SPEAKER_02]: True, yeah, but actually we had a chance to meet Gale in real life last year when we were in England.
2:42
[SPEAKER_02]: And it was so interesting.
2:44
[SPEAKER_02]: I was just chatting with her on the side of class.
2:49
[SPEAKER_02]: And the conversation was so like she was so inspiring in the five minutes that we were talking, and I was like, pull it out.
2:57
[SPEAKER_02]: You need to be a guest on Leslie's pod.
2:59
[SPEAKER_03]: Gale, I don't know if you believe in past life, but in a past life, I feel like we were family.
3:05
[SPEAKER_02]: serious.
3:06
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm really really glad that we're able to have Gail on and I love that the very first thing that she said is I don't think I fit the be it mold, you know, and the you to agree that this would be inspiring the parents for the kids so that the kids can be it.
3:22
[SPEAKER_02]: I, well, that's to say, I mean, being able to disagree with her in that she did break the be a bald, but, you know, I love the conversation.
3:29
[SPEAKER_03]: You don't think she broke them all.
3:31
[SPEAKER_02]: No, I think she was being until she saw all day every day.
3:34
[SPEAKER_02]: I agree.
3:35
[SPEAKER_02]: She was very innovative is in her career.
3:38
[SPEAKER_02]: How 50 years is a teacher, you know?
3:39
[SPEAKER_03]: Especially as you saw my house she like got into what she's doing.
3:42
[SPEAKER_03]: It's a be a tell you see it kind of a story.
3:44
[SPEAKER_03]: So yeah, so sorry, you didn't, but also sorry, Connie didn't.
3:47
[SPEAKER_03]: I didn't write it out, but also I can't just have people who just tell me stories about themselves all day, we are four and I, I would have five, almost five years on this pod like crazy crazy.
3:59
[SPEAKER_03]: I want to be entertained as well.
4:00
[SPEAKER_03]: I want to learn something and sometimes it's bringing experts who help us.
4:05
[SPEAKER_03]: get to where we're going.
4:06
[SPEAKER_03]: You can't just be inspired all the time.
4:07
[SPEAKER_03]: You have to have information that you can integrate.
4:09
[SPEAKER_03]: So I really felt like that's what she did.
4:11
[SPEAKER_03]: But anyways, before we keep going in, just a complimenting gale hug man, today is March 26, 2026, and it's a warehouse day.
4:21
[SPEAKER_03]: We celebrate where Hat Day on March 26 is a fun fabulous way to raise awareness for brain tumor research and race funds while we're at it.
4:31
[SPEAKER_03]: The holiday was created as a way to get our heads and our hats together to advance research and find a cure for brain tumors.
4:38
[SPEAKER_03]: You don't need to have it affected to make it different.
4:39
[SPEAKER_03]: So we've got some ideas to get you ahead.
4:42
[SPEAKER_03]: This
4:46
[SPEAKER_03]: They didn't give us anything.
4:48
[SPEAKER_03]: No links.
4:49
[SPEAKER_03]: There's not a charity on this, not further down.
4:52
[SPEAKER_03]: There's a deal.
4:53
[SPEAKER_03]: Okay, before we just start talking about charity, we have not researched.
4:56
[SPEAKER_03]: I highly recommend you Google in your area, what local charities are doing with brain tumor research, where it's state charities that are doing it because...
5:05
[SPEAKER_02]: Hold on, I'm going to read you more.
5:07
[SPEAKER_02]: occurring in around 250,000 people globally a year, we still a long way to go to the study of brain tumors.
5:14
[SPEAKER_02]: Thankfully due to science advances, scientific advances in the fields of chemotherapy and radiation, the survival rate is higher than ever before.
5:21
[SPEAKER_02]: Once brain tumors meant the end of the unfortunate individuals who were who developed them, it wasn't until 1879 that a Scottish surgeon, became the first person to successfully remove a brain tumor, his patient
5:36
[SPEAKER_02]: the illness.
5:37
[SPEAKER_03]: So we're happy is about brain tumor.
5:39
[SPEAKER_03]: You just said 18 79 1870.
5:41
[SPEAKER_02]: Well, it's there.
5:43
[SPEAKER_03]: And also you're not under anesthesia for brain tumors.
5:46
[SPEAKER_03]: You are awake.
5:47
[SPEAKER_03]: Could you imagine home girl was like, I'm going to die.
5:50
[SPEAKER_03]: So you may as well open up my head.
5:53
[SPEAKER_03]: I trust you.
5:54
[SPEAKER_03]: They didn't even have I was it.
5:56
[SPEAKER_03]: But did we have pasteurization yet?
5:57
[SPEAKER_03]: Like, oh, my god.
5:58
[SPEAKER_03]: Like,
5:59
[SPEAKER_02]: I have no idea.
5:59
[SPEAKER_03]: Oh my god.
6:00
[SPEAKER_03]: That's an Indian brain timers, but I am a little brave ass woman.
6:04
[SPEAKER_03]: You know, I had a fucking goal.
6:05
[SPEAKER_02]: So the scientific process that was developed over the following years meant a speedy advancement for understanding a treatment of the condition that a discovery of X-rays meant that it became possible to locate tumors in the brain accurately through scanning probably instead of just cutting their head open.
6:21
[SPEAKER_01]: Just a little bit of a camera.
6:22
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh my god.
6:22
[SPEAKER_02]: Now this is continuing to be the best way to identify brain tumors ever since.
6:29
[SPEAKER_02]: tomography or CT scanning allowed physicians to see a clear image of the brain for the very first time So it's only been 50 years.
6:37
[SPEAKER_02]: We've been able to actually see a vision like a full scan of the brain This but however despite these significant advances in the last 150 years there still is no fail safe cure for brain tumors There's a result we get together on wear hat data raise money and awareness for brain tumor research
6:55
[SPEAKER_02]: Okay, typically uses a form of protection from external elements, hats or worn as a symbol of internal protection on this day as well.
7:01
[SPEAKER_02]: And by talking more about this condition, we help each other to spot symptoms early on, but raise funds.
7:06
[SPEAKER_02]: We help support a scientist or a kind of a cure.
7:08
[SPEAKER_03]: So we don't have any, they didn't give us any charity just so, so go look.
7:12
[SPEAKER_03]: I did not.
7:13
[SPEAKER_03]: Okay, so go look when up.
7:14
[SPEAKER_03]: Here's a deal.
7:15
[SPEAKER_03]: There's someone in your life who has one.
7:16
[SPEAKER_03]: I have my grandmother died of a brain tumor.
7:18
[SPEAKER_02]: She did.
7:19
[SPEAKER_03]: It's not genetic, so don't freak out when you hear that I have another time with a brain tumor.
7:23
[SPEAKER_02]: Like her mother almost died of a brain tumor, they were able to successfully remove it, and literally it was as if she got 10 years younger during her recovery.
7:32
[SPEAKER_03]: Oh, it was amazing.
7:33
[SPEAKER_03]: But it was my grandmother had one, and it was quite fast by the time we knew about it.
7:37
[SPEAKER_03]: And then my cousin, he's actually
7:39
[SPEAKER_03]: had brain tumors for almost 20 years.
7:42
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.
7:42
[SPEAKER_03]: And maybe I think we're out 20 years.
7:44
[SPEAKER_03]: They've done because of experiments and charities and people raising money for research.
7:49
[SPEAKER_03]: He's actually been able to benefit from these experimental surgeries and ways of treating it to shrink them.
7:57
[SPEAKER_03]: And so I just want to say like,
7:59
[SPEAKER_03]: if you are looking for a cause and this touches you because you know someone you've heard about it that this is, if we all have a cause, just imagine like how many people get helped.
8:09
[SPEAKER_03]: So I think there's a lot of pressure on picking and like I've helped everybody.
8:11
[SPEAKER_03]: If you can just help one, but anyway, there's it touches all of us and it's there's not always a rhyme or reason.
8:16
[SPEAKER_03]: So anyways, that's why we're wearing hats right now.
8:18
[SPEAKER_02]: That is what we're in.
8:19
[SPEAKER_02]: That's right.
8:20
[SPEAKER_03]: If you're touching on you, too, but if you're listening, we're wearing hats right now.
8:24
[SPEAKER_03]: Okay, a bride is wearing a podcast hatch.
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[SPEAKER_02]: I am.
8:27
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
8:27
[SPEAKER_03]: Well, lastly, we were in Poland and I forgot that the other 26.
8:31
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh, so we're going to be.
8:32
[SPEAKER_02]: We'll be in British.
8:34
[SPEAKER_03]: And what's going to be so much fun.
8:36
[SPEAKER_02]: And yeah, we'll probably in Amsterdam right now.
8:38
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, that's what we're pulling into bruise early.
8:41
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, and night early.
8:42
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, absolutely.
8:44
[SPEAKER_03]: It's been so much fun.
8:45
[SPEAKER_03]: With Karen freshman, it's a great time.
8:46
[SPEAKER_03]: And then we'll actually spend the after bruises over.
8:50
[SPEAKER_03]: We're next to him about nine days in France.
8:53
[SPEAKER_03]: Then we're going to pop on the train to London.
8:55
[SPEAKER_03]: And you can check out and see if there's any tickets left at xxll.co-p-o-t London.
9:01
[SPEAKER_03]: Super excited about that.
9:02
[SPEAKER_03]: I know that their Fridays and setters are sold up, but there's some spots on Sunday.
9:06
[SPEAKER_03]: It's really worth going to.
9:07
[SPEAKER_03]: And by the way, we said in the last week, I'm not sure we'll be back to your up guys.
9:11
[SPEAKER_03]: I've just got other places we've got a seat.
9:13
[SPEAKER_03]: who spring training is a thing that anyone can join and be on plane to.
9:17
[SPEAKER_02]: You can actually be in May.
9:19
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
9:19
[SPEAKER_03]: And so after POT London May 12 through the 17th, you can join from the comfort of your own Pilates space wherever that is.
9:26
[SPEAKER_03]: All levels are welcome.
9:28
[SPEAKER_03]: Yes, the theme is about getting overhead.
9:30
[SPEAKER_03]: But we actually have people who will teachers on our team who do not do over exercises.
9:35
[SPEAKER_03]: We have a teacher on our team who are going to show you how if you have if you're in a larger body, booty abundance, test abundance, like best ways to get overhead and then we'll have hypermobile teachers showing how you get overhead and then we'll just be getting overhead and you will have the tools you need to do the best thing for you and that's the goal of spring training.
9:53
[SPEAKER_03]: So, OPC.me, such events.
9:55
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, come join us.
10:02
[SPEAKER_02]: Before we get into it though, with Gale, we get a question.
10:06
[SPEAKER_02]: So this is a bit of a long one.
10:08
[SPEAKER_02]: So bear with me here, Kendra, Kenny Swan on Instagram asks, hey, let's say I watched your YouTube video on teaching contemporary on classical equipment.
10:15
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm a stat instructor.
10:16
[SPEAKER_02]: I have love classical equipment, especially the reformer.
10:19
[SPEAKER_02]: I would love to have classical equipment in my studio, but I've had some backlash from classical instructors that I'm quote unquote not qualified to teach on classical equipment.
10:28
[SPEAKER_02]: So fuck the ploddy's place is what I would say.
10:31
[SPEAKER_02]: I don't think that's so crazy though.
10:34
[SPEAKER_02]: Sorry.
10:34
[SPEAKER_02]: I don't think that's so crazy, though.
10:36
[SPEAKER_02]: Any well-trained instructor should be able to adjust for the equipment that they're using.
10:41
[SPEAKER_02]: I know that some exercises that can't be done not that many really though, right?
10:45
[SPEAKER_02]: Like between the classical and contemporary my question is, in your expert opinion, is it acceptable for a contemporary teacher to teach unclassical equipment?
10:54
[SPEAKER_03]: Oh my god, what the fuck the fuck first of all just so you know I hired many a contemporary train teacher when I worked for equinox and guess what the equipment is classical if you you had to be able to manage it don't don't break it but if you so sad that's that you've had classical instructors giving you a hard time but also even wanting to buy the equipment
11:16
[SPEAKER_02]: They can just take a long fucking walk.
11:18
[SPEAKER_02]: That is so ridiculous.
11:20
[SPEAKER_03]: I know, if you're a classroom instructor who is like, can't believe this is how I'm answering, we have to have a talk about the cult that you're in.
11:27
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm just going to say it right now.
11:28
[SPEAKER_03]: I know that's not how you're supposed to help people out of a cult, but like, I teach on contemporary equipment all the time.
11:34
[SPEAKER_03]: Like, that's where I teach.
11:35
[SPEAKER_03]: And I'm on a pop up tour.
11:36
[SPEAKER_03]: You know what?
11:36
[SPEAKER_03]: My classical instructor told me and my first training.
11:39
[SPEAKER_03]: She said, you need to make sure that you take the time to understand
11:46
[SPEAKER_03]: because when you teach classically on different pieces of equipment, it will change the exercise.
11:50
[SPEAKER_03]: But you can't be limited to the equipment that a studio has.
11:54
[SPEAKER_03]: So if you want to be a great instructor, you got to figure it out.
11:57
[SPEAKER_03]: And so every two I've ever went to, I would get on the equipment.
12:00
[SPEAKER_03]: I would make sure I would figure what springs felt the same way.
12:03
[SPEAKER_03]: How do I set the ropes up?
12:04
[SPEAKER_03]: So they feel the same way.
12:05
[SPEAKER_03]: I am so proud that I know how to do that.
12:08
[SPEAKER_03]: And no contemporary instructor says, oh, she can't come in here.
12:11
[SPEAKER_03]: She doesn't know how to use these risers.
12:13
[SPEAKER_03]: She only uses the ropes in the
12:16
[SPEAKER_03]: No one says that to me.
12:18
[SPEAKER_03]: So how dare these classical people say that it grosses me out.
12:22
[SPEAKER_03]: So just so you know, anyone can buy equipment, just so we're clear, you don't have to be a trained person.
12:29
[SPEAKER_03]: Do I wish that people who call themselves teachers went through proper trainings, I wish there was some sort of regulation making sure that
12:37
[SPEAKER_03]: because there's a lot of people calling things pulleys and not pulleys.
12:39
[SPEAKER_03]: Like that's kind of where that comes from.
12:41
[SPEAKER_03]: That does not come from this.
12:42
[SPEAKER_03]: You're a trained person on how to teach.
12:44
[SPEAKER_03]: So here's a deal.
12:45
[SPEAKER_03]: Okay, Dr. You've done the thing how to learn how to teach pulleys.
12:48
[SPEAKER_03]: Right, your first training taught you how to teach pulleys.
12:50
[SPEAKER_03]: It doesn't actually matter to me what it is.
12:52
[SPEAKER_03]: You can buy classical equipment.
12:54
[SPEAKER_03]: You can absolutely teach which you can translate over on the classical equipment.
12:58
[SPEAKER_03]: I don't think that's wrong.
12:59
[SPEAKER_03]: Sometimes you might need those tools in your tool belt for a client.
13:02
[SPEAKER_03]: And then you can, through my YouTube videos, through a lot of people's YouTube videos, teach yourself classical.
13:08
[SPEAKER_03]: I do think you should read classical educated books, not all of them are good.
13:12
[SPEAKER_03]: So here's a couple.
13:12
[SPEAKER_03]: We have a YouTube video that I'll go into deeper books that I like about Pilates and they're all so the cage lion, John Steele.
13:20
[SPEAKER_03]: Contrality Handbook by Sandy Shemoda, get to know Joe Poliz, a Kathy Strak, incredible books that you should read that will help educate you about the why behind-classical, because what I don't like is when people just watch if classical video teach it in the order, but not really understand the why behind-the-word, because that's why you want to change some things.
13:39
[SPEAKER_03]: So I do think, if I was to teach contemporary, I'd want to know the why behind-the-word, right?
13:43
[SPEAKER_03]: So I think that, but do I do that?
13:45
[SPEAKER_02]: The YouTube video, by the way, is called, what are the best Polodies books?
13:48
[SPEAKER_02]: from Leslie Logan and online Pilates classes.
13:52
[SPEAKER_03]: So I'm sorry, like anyone telling, I don't care what school I don't think.
13:57
[SPEAKER_02]: I don't think those classical teachers are qualified to teach on classical equipment.
14:02
[SPEAKER_02]: That's what I have to say.
14:03
[SPEAKER_03]: I mean, like, these, I bet you can, I bet you can drive.
14:06
[SPEAKER_03]: If you ask those people, if I'm a classical teacher, those people would say, no, because the only people who talk like that are people who think because who train me that I'm not classical.
14:15
[SPEAKER_03]: So like there's this weird group of people.
14:16
[SPEAKER_03]: So what you just met is you just saw big red flag run away from these people.
14:20
[SPEAKER_03]: These are not my people.
14:21
[SPEAKER_03]: So in the applies world, everyone's got to find their people.
14:24
[SPEAKER_03]: And I might not be the people for you.
14:26
[SPEAKER_03]: what I do have to offer, if you want to invest in an actual, I would call, this is where our for teachers have a call, you're looking for a bridge or a mentorship.
14:35
[SPEAKER_03]: If you've already done a comprehensive training, I think it's a little weird to go do a comprehensive training in the other style where you're with people who've never taught before.
14:45
[SPEAKER_03]: Because one,
14:46
[SPEAKER_03]: They're going to be like, oh my god, this person is like knows what they're doing.
14:49
[SPEAKER_03]: And you're going to be like, these, I'm coaching these people more than I'm getting helped.
14:53
[SPEAKER_03]: Sure.
14:54
[SPEAKER_03]: I like a mentorship program where it's it is people who all been top and now you want to dive deeper into a study of Pilates.
15:01
[SPEAKER_03]: I have one, it's called Elevate.
15:02
[SPEAKER_03]: It's more than half fill for next year.
15:04
[SPEAKER_03]: It's Leslie Logan.co slash Elevate.
15:07
[SPEAKER_03]: But you don't have to pick mine.
15:08
[SPEAKER_03]: There are other ones out there.
15:09
[SPEAKER_03]: Karen Frischman is your friend, who has one.
15:11
[SPEAKER_03]: She has her 18 months.
15:13
[SPEAKER_03]: You're just, you're looking for a classical-police mentorship.
15:16
[SPEAKER_03]: But you don't even need to do that to go buy the classical equipment and start doing classical work.
15:21
[SPEAKER_03]: You can have an OPC membership and learn a bunch of stuff.
15:24
[SPEAKER_03]: Everyone's fallen the order.
15:25
[SPEAKER_03]: Everyone's doing things based on Joe's intentions and using variations as needed.
15:28
[SPEAKER_03]: So,
15:28
[SPEAKER_03]: You're good, Kendra, and my book, you're good.
15:30
[SPEAKER_03]: Those people can suck it.
15:35
[SPEAKER_03]: You know, in the words of pumps from my favorite podcast, they can, b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-
15:44
[SPEAKER_02]: Well, if you have a question, just text us at 310-905-5-534 or if you're in an national field-free to submit a question at beitpod.com slash questions and also leave us away.
15:57
[SPEAKER_03]: If you want me to get angry for you, clear.
16:00
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
16:01
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
16:01
[SPEAKER_02]: You want us to tell someone new.
16:05
[SPEAKER_02]: All right, stick around.
16:05
[SPEAKER_02]: We'll be right back.
16:06
[SPEAKER_02]: We'll get a dick into this conversation.
16:08
[SPEAKER_02]: Hold on.
16:08
[SPEAKER_02]: All right, what?
16:09
[SPEAKER_04]: That co-host also, I've found the podcast before, but she did it again today when I was listening twice.
16:15
[SPEAKER_04]: She says, 2000, 2020, 2006.
16:17
[SPEAKER_04]: 2020, 2006.
16:18
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, that's so funny.
16:21
[SPEAKER_04]: I die every time.
16:24
[SPEAKER_03]: I guess she gets to make it worse.
16:26
[SPEAKER_03]: I love it.
16:27
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm like, what if that's how he said it?
16:28
[SPEAKER_03]: Oh, it's January, 2020, 2006.
16:32
[SPEAKER_02]: Okay, now why don't I break all right.
16:34
[SPEAKER_02]: We'll be right back.
16:35
[SPEAKER_02]: Okay, welcome back.
16:36
[SPEAKER_02]: Let's talk about Gale Hugman Gale has been teaching for over 50 years y'all 50 years.
16:43
[SPEAKER_02]: He's been teaching.
16:45
[SPEAKER_02]: She works with children and parents to help them flourish together after spending decades in London schools she shifted into private practice to focus on motivation and self development
16:55
[SPEAKER_02]: helping children build self-control, confidence, and independence.
17:00
[SPEAKER_02]: And helping parents rethink how they guide and support their crazy kids.
17:08
[SPEAKER_03]: Well, I mean, I just really have obsessed with this because like, I remember listening to Seth Goden say that like parents' roles, after kids are home from schools not to help them like really do home work.
17:19
[SPEAKER_03]: It's to help them learn how to be analytical.
17:22
[SPEAKER_03]: because if they could be analytical, then they can probably, and this is before AI guys, this is like, I don't know, I think there's like 2015 when I heard him say this, he says, then they're irreplaceable, right?
17:34
[SPEAKER_03]: Like if they can be analytical.
17:36
[SPEAKER_03]: And then I remember who's the host of survivor?
17:40
[SPEAKER_03]: Jeff, it's a Jeff, it feels like a Jeff.
17:42
[SPEAKER_03]: Anyways, he, he, he just probes.
17:45
[SPEAKER_03]: Yes, him, he was talking about raising kids.
17:48
[SPEAKER_03]: And he said, you know, my daughter was talking about how she wants to be a large animal that and she wants to be a tennis photographer, pro tennis photographer.
17:59
[SPEAKER_02]: As he's going hand in hand.
18:00
[SPEAKER_03]: Correct.
18:01
[SPEAKER_03]: Exactly.
18:01
[SPEAKER_03]: That's exactly what his thought is.
18:03
[SPEAKER_03]: But you can't react because then you can like affect them.
18:07
[SPEAKER_03]: So he just so his job is not like, oh, you can't do you to pick one.
18:11
[SPEAKER_03]: That's what the world would do.
18:13
[SPEAKER_03]: He said my job as her parent is to challenge her to tell me how she's going to do that.
18:17
[SPEAKER_03]: So I said, oh, that's interesting.
18:20
[SPEAKER_03]: How are you going to learn both those skills and do that?
18:24
[SPEAKER_03]: Do you think?
18:25
[SPEAKER_03]: What do you think?
18:26
[SPEAKER_03]: And she goes, oh, there's these two schools here that have really high performing tennis teams for photography as a degree and large animal vet.
18:34
[SPEAKER_03]: And so I can actually go to this school on a scholarship and get these two degrees and then
18:40
[SPEAKER_03]: Because tennis is seasonal.
18:41
[SPEAKER_03]: I'll be a seasonal photographer when I'm not in season all work at this place over here in the large animal vet thing.
18:47
[SPEAKER_03]: Like she had it all figured out.
18:48
[SPEAKER_03]: Oh, yeah.
18:48
[SPEAKER_03]: So had he said you have to pick one right.
18:52
[SPEAKER_03]: it would have just killed the re she did research she figured out a plan and look whether or not I haven't looked and see what Jeff probes dotters doing because like you know it there's enough time she might have been a bit of a set but that's not the job right and so that goes into what gales talking about here that i love she said when we talk about listening to children we don't talk about the process i will say are you listening and what they are thinking as i'm hearing you so like i've been done it's like are you listening i'm like hard words
19:18
[SPEAKER_02]: Right.
19:19
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, I'm totally listening.
19:20
[SPEAKER_02]: And listen, I didn't realize it was a single bit of it.
19:23
[SPEAKER_03]: But she said that, you know, even as adults, we are taught listening skills.
19:27
[SPEAKER_03]: Like, we're like, we'll go to events, schools, trainings, and they'll like teach you how to like process the thing that you're about to do.
19:33
[SPEAKER_03]: But we just expect children to know how to listen and like, what to pay an attention to.
19:38
[SPEAKER_03]: Dremor and shit's Greek when like Alexis, like went back to school.
19:42
[SPEAKER_03]: And then she highlighted the whole page.
19:45
[SPEAKER_03]: And they're like, oh, you didn't highlight this, but she's like, oh, okay.
19:48
[SPEAKER_03]: Like, she was highlighting like what she was reading.
19:50
[SPEAKER_03]: Like, she wasn't taught.
19:52
[SPEAKER_03]: Like, when do you put the highlighter on the page?
19:55
[SPEAKER_03]: Like, what's the point of highlighting, right?
19:57
[SPEAKER_03]: And so it's funny.
19:58
[SPEAKER_03]: But like, it goes to this.
19:59
[SPEAKER_03]: And like, I think
20:01
[SPEAKER_03]: This is where, like, as people with younger people in our lives, we don't have children where, like, when our nieces and nephews are around us, I'm trying to be really conscious of, like, am I answering the question for them, or I'm giving them, am I, am I giving them ample time to kind of, like, process what's happening?
20:17
[SPEAKER_03]: And then tell me back what's going on.
20:20
[SPEAKER_03]: And that does take time.
20:21
[SPEAKER_03]: I just want to know, I just want to understand that takes so much time.
20:24
[SPEAKER_03]: I just want to tell
20:29
[SPEAKER_02]: Well, I found it interesting that she was talking about the process.
20:34
[SPEAKER_02]: Because for me, I found it, she started talking about process in the same way that I've always talked about the why.
20:42
[SPEAKER_02]: You know, and when, like, I don't have children, but we run a company with people in it.
20:49
[SPEAKER_02]: And I've always found that, especially when there's something
20:56
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm able to clearly convey why it always goes over better with them still grudgingly doing the thing than if I'm just like just because I fucking said so do it.
21:08
[SPEAKER_02]: No, that doesn't work, right?
21:09
[SPEAKER_02]: I mean, they might still do it, and they might also quit.
21:12
[SPEAKER_02]: But like, when people understand the why behind the what?
21:16
[SPEAKER_02]: Now all of a sudden, they're like, oh, that makes sense, I get it.
21:20
[SPEAKER_02]: Okay.
21:20
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.
21:21
[SPEAKER_03]: I can believe, agree, I think like sometimes, even to some of you tell people like, oh, you know, like it's really simple.
21:26
[SPEAKER_03]: You have too many clients.
21:27
[SPEAKER_03]: We need a raise your rate, and they're like,
21:30
[SPEAKER_03]: So scared and I'm like, okay, hold on, let me paint the picture of why this is how this is going to help.
21:34
[SPEAKER_03]: Like I do think that you're right there.
21:37
[SPEAKER_03]: And I remember when you were training with a Adrian cooler who's been on the pod and you were frustrated just even with them with one of the people who's not our team anymore, but we'd hired for a specific project and you were frustrated and he taught you to even ask like, okay, if you tell them.
21:52
[SPEAKER_03]: what you want them to do.
21:53
[SPEAKER_03]: Ask them what it is that they're going, but other action steps going to be because that helps you understand, did they hear or listen?
22:01
[SPEAKER_03]: Did they process it?
22:03
[SPEAKER_03]: Did they hear what you said to do?
22:05
[SPEAKER_03]: It's really easy for us to say the right words and then the interpreted incorrectly just based on like the game of telephone, where people are, what words that stuck out to them, what words triggered them.
22:16
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, Adrian was episode 262, but I don't know.
22:19
[SPEAKER_02]: That was my back.
22:20
[SPEAKER_02]: I know.
22:20
[SPEAKER_02]: 262.
22:21
[SPEAKER_03]: Did they hear?
22:22
[SPEAKER_03]: Did like there was like two, was there one year that was like two years long?
22:25
[SPEAKER_02]: But I agree, you know, like when we are willing to explain the process, that suddenly really can be the catalyst that shifts behavior in a child, you know, or in a teammate.
22:39
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm going to say, I don't think that I'm in a rebel at heart.
22:43
[SPEAKER_03]: That's not how I think I was born as a child.
22:45
[SPEAKER_03]: Like I'm quite the perfectionist over Chiever, but any time I heard because I said so, or because I told you to.
22:54
[SPEAKER_03]: I can go back to like 17 memories on my brain of me in my head going, I don't know.
23:00
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah exactly.
23:02
[SPEAKER_03]: And then doing enough to not get yelled at for doing it the right way.
23:07
[SPEAKER_03]: Like you catch my flies with honey, but you also create people who you want to be around if you kind of give them the chance to be in the process.
23:17
[SPEAKER_03]: Learn the process.
23:18
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
23:20
[SPEAKER_02]: that that actually feeds exactly into what I wanted to talk about, which was she told the story about this four-year-old who when she was like when Gale was putting the pencils away the four-year-old was like me I want to do it I want to I want to do it right and she said something really intriguing she said kids want responsibility they are intuitively born to grow
23:42
[SPEAKER_02]: They are born to develop.
23:43
[SPEAKER_02]: They want more.
23:44
[SPEAKER_02]: They want to be part of the pack, a society.
23:46
[SPEAKER_02]: They see what adults are doing.
23:49
[SPEAKER_02]: And they're like, well, I want to do that too.
23:50
[SPEAKER_02]: How many of us remember thinking back to when we were a child and being like, I can't wait until I'm an adult, why?
23:56
[SPEAKER_02]: Because I can make my own decisions, or I can do my own thing, or whatever the thing was, and so interestingly,
24:05
[SPEAKER_02]: You know, actually one thing that I found really interesting about Gail that was not explicitly said is obviously she is a patient person.
24:14
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, patients, right?
24:16
[SPEAKER_02]: And she's willing, she understands the kid, she understands what they're doing, why they're doing it.
24:24
[SPEAKER_02]: And she also understands when they're processing or not processing the information that they're receiving.
24:29
[SPEAKER_02]: She told another story about asking someone nine times to repeat back there what she just told them to do, right?
24:36
[SPEAKER_02]: Nine times.
24:37
[SPEAKER_02]: That takes so much patience.
24:39
[SPEAKER_03]: I think that goes back to it doesn't matter what the goal is if you're really clear on the goal it allows you to
24:51
[SPEAKER_03]: to have, I don't have patients inherently.
24:54
[SPEAKER_02]: All right, for her, for her, the goal was not for the kid to go do the things she asked him to do.
24:58
[SPEAKER_03]: No.
24:58
[SPEAKER_02]: The goal was for the kid to learn how to listen and process what she, what they were listening.
25:03
[SPEAKER_03]: But I want to just say, because I, I know we have some plays and structures who are listening and they, they get frustrated when they're clients don't remember the names of the exercises or the.
25:12
[SPEAKER_03]: how to do things that I am a person who believes in like radical responsibility.
25:16
[SPEAKER_03]: My clients are going to learn their exercises and they are capable of it.
25:20
[SPEAKER_03]: I work out at gyms at a hotel.
25:22
[SPEAKER_03]: These are people on vacation who manage to come into a gym and figure out how to do something in there, which means they look, someone taught it and they, they're how to do it.
25:31
[SPEAKER_03]: So I am willing to be patient enough to not overcorrect someone or to do it for them instead to go, okay, the hundred.
25:41
[SPEAKER_03]: You know this one, it's this and like, oh, it's this.
25:44
[SPEAKER_03]: Okay, like giving them the time, the space and everyone's like, like, I don't have my job is not entertaining them.
25:51
[SPEAKER_03]: It's to help them and know how to move their own body.
25:54
[SPEAKER_03]: And so it's really funny because I have these clients who told my dad, year, this is like when I was first teaching.
25:59
[SPEAKER_03]: She is the most patient woman and my dad was like, my daughter is patient.
26:07
[SPEAKER_03]: And I will say, loves, I am not patient.
26:09
[SPEAKER_03]: I am one of the most impatient people when it comes to the things I want, how one things to go to, but when it comes to someone else's process, I am very patient because I know the in-result is they'll have radical responsibility autonomy over their body.
26:25
[SPEAKER_03]: They'll understand and move it.
26:27
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm not going to be there when they trip.
26:29
[SPEAKER_03]: or have to catch or grab something.
26:31
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm like, oh, right arm up, reach.
26:34
[SPEAKER_03]: I won't be there.
26:35
[SPEAKER_03]: So I think that I have no idea.
26:37
[SPEAKER_03]: I think actually I have an Medicaid gale and didn't spend some time with her.
26:40
[SPEAKER_03]: There is a lot of patients to her.
26:42
[SPEAKER_03]: But also maybe not.
26:44
[SPEAKER_03]: Maybe she's just really clear on when I'm with this child, the goal is to give them time to process.
26:49
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, and for her it sounds like like listening to her stories, you know, she is intentional about giving people the tools like you were just talking about the tools to develop as a child to grow into the adult that joins the the pack right the society right and and if you when you are empowering them with the tools, then they can make
27:16
[SPEAKER_02]: decisions that are logical and all those kinds of things instead of just be like, I guess, like, like, think about it.
27:22
[SPEAKER_02]: If you're just like, do it.
27:24
[SPEAKER_02]: Why?
27:24
[SPEAKER_02]: Because I said so, what are you doing?
27:25
[SPEAKER_02]: You're actually, you're actually molding a human to always be told what to do.
27:30
[SPEAKER_03]: Right.
27:30
[SPEAKER_03]: And guess what?
27:31
[SPEAKER_03]: They won't need those people in the future because that's what robots will do.
27:35
[SPEAKER_03]: They could be programmed.
27:36
[SPEAKER_03]: People aren't not people will be rebellious.
27:38
[SPEAKER_03]: And I know y'all have heard me say this.
27:40
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm a little worried about who the fuck's going to take care of me because their mom won't be around to tell them what to do.
27:45
[SPEAKER_03]: And I'm in need so I want to take care of me because I'd have children.
27:48
[SPEAKER_03]: So, just say.
27:51
[SPEAKER_02]: Well, on that note.
27:54
[SPEAKER_02]: That girl.
27:55
[SPEAKER_04]: And Casey need a motivation to make your child not an asshole at Leslie.
27:58
[SPEAKER_04]: Your podcast host is a little worried about her like in the life care.
28:02
[SPEAKER_04]: Okay.
28:06
[SPEAKER_02]: All right, we'll be right back.
28:08
[SPEAKER_02]: We're going to take it to those Beat Action items that we had with Gail.
28:11
[SPEAKER_02]: So stick around.
28:12
[SPEAKER_02]: Welcome back.
28:13
[SPEAKER_02]: All right, so finally, let's talk about those Beat Action items.
28:16
[SPEAKER_02]: What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items can we take away from your combo with Gail Hugman?
28:22
[SPEAKER_02]: She said, straight up, you cannot control children.
28:27
[SPEAKER_02]: You cannot control them.
28:29
[SPEAKER_02]: You have to teach them how to control themselves.
28:31
[SPEAKER_03]: I, I have chills and I love this so much.
28:34
[SPEAKER_03]: I feel like that has to be very free game.
28:37
[SPEAKER_03]: Does it do you think it's freeing?
28:38
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh my gosh, so freeing.
28:40
[SPEAKER_02]: Like, I, I, I, I, I freeing is a good word for it, but, but I, but I also think that it's, I guess freeing is the right word because when people are feel like they have, they will lose control.
28:51
[SPEAKER_02]: And what does it do for you as the person trying to have control?
28:54
[SPEAKER_02]: You get angry, freaked out, you're like, like,
28:56
[SPEAKER_02]: You're embarrassed.
28:57
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
28:58
[SPEAKER_03]: So embarrassed.
29:00
[SPEAKER_03]: This child is like doing the fact that they're normally really good.
29:03
[SPEAKER_03]: Like all the things.
29:04
[SPEAKER_02]: Which are forms of narcissism, by the way, but basically it's what you are.
29:10
[SPEAKER_02]: when you are teaching them to control themselves, you know, now it's not your responsibility if they control themselves in that way.
29:18
[SPEAKER_02]: You taught them how to do the thing, and if they're not doing it, then there's another thing going on there, because they know how to control themselves.
29:25
[SPEAKER_03]: Oh my gosh, you guys, if you did not listen to episode, you have to listen to it because it was very, there was a whole point about the homework, the homework that made me like, I just was like, oh my God, I wish,
29:36
[SPEAKER_03]: I wish this was something my parents do.
29:38
[SPEAKER_03]: I wish I think my mom, it was a school teacher would love this.
29:41
[SPEAKER_03]: Like my mom, I know it because she actually took the homework away from kids, because the parents were doing it.
29:46
[SPEAKER_03]: But it was a whole thing about like, if the kid doesn't do the homework and the time, the teacher said it should take, then instead of doing it for them or fighting with them, you take it away, the homework is done.
29:56
[SPEAKER_03]: It was supposed to take 30 minutes, it's been 30 minutes.
29:59
[SPEAKER_03]: And I will go to school with you tomorrow while you explain why you couldn't get it done 30 minutes.
30:05
[SPEAKER_03]: Then they have to have, they have to actually think about why did it, oh, I was kind of video game.
30:09
[SPEAKER_03]: Well, not, they have to admit that.
30:10
[SPEAKER_03]: Or, oh, I didn't understand the lesson.
30:12
[SPEAKER_03]: Okay.
30:12
[SPEAKER_03]: Well, the teacher needs to know, because a teacher should make sure you can understand the lesson before you leave.
30:18
[SPEAKER_02]: Because they're teaching you how to do the lesson.
30:20
[SPEAKER_03]: Correct.
30:21
[SPEAKER_02]: I mean, not doing the lesson for you.
30:23
[SPEAKER_02]: Like, it's, this is a perfect parallel.
30:25
[SPEAKER_02]: The teacher would never do your homework for you.
30:27
[SPEAKER_03]: Right.
30:27
[SPEAKER_02]: The teacher is going to teach you how to do the homework.
30:29
[SPEAKER_02]: So, why do we feel like we are supposed to control children?
30:32
[SPEAKER_02]: No, we're supposed to teach them
30:34
[SPEAKER_03]: Right.
30:35
[SPEAKER_03]: For example, I tell elevate members like the homework for elevate is not mandatory.
30:41
[SPEAKER_03]: If you do it helps to understand the learning style you are, it also helps to understand what you understood from the weekend I just taught you, which gives me feedback that I could never get from a survey in understanding that I know what I said that weekend, but what did you hear right, like what did you take in what did you understand and this past homework thing someone felt the form in a way that I've never seen before.
31:02
[SPEAKER_03]: And I was just like, hey, I think that like, you might have misunderstood what was going on here.
31:06
[SPEAKER_03]: So when I was expecting, she read it and then she explained why she understood the way she did, crazy reason why.
31:12
[SPEAKER_03]: But I was like, you know what, it would really simple for us to just do an example.
31:16
[SPEAKER_03]: And then people would know how to do it.
31:17
[SPEAKER_03]: And then I, so like, it also, the teacher will learn.
31:20
[SPEAKER_03]: I wasn't good.
31:21
[SPEAKER_03]: I didn't give girl enough instruction.
31:22
[SPEAKER_03]: So I just, I love that goalless whole thing.
31:24
[SPEAKER_03]: It's so good.
31:25
[SPEAKER_03]: But it goes back to what you were saying.
31:27
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, and the two of you then got into a conversation about saying, you know, don't do this or no or all those kinds of things and I'm not saying that you should never say no, but you your example was that Joe Pilates wouldn't tell you what not to do.
31:41
[SPEAKER_02]: He would tell you what to do, right?
31:44
[SPEAKER_02]: So how should you control yourself in public, not control yourself will also like we just watch crazy stupid love because love that puppy so much and.
31:55
[SPEAKER_03]: Joe would also choose exercises that you needed to teach you, teach your body what it was not capable of doing yet.
32:04
[SPEAKER_03]: And in crazy stupid love Ryan Gosling like Miyagi's, you know, Steve Kerrell, and I think that like that's all like the modeling of it is like, you know, is really important.
32:15
[SPEAKER_03]: So there's just so there's so much.
32:17
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, go listen to it so she concluded this thought by saying so instead of me trying to control them the kids I'll tell them the consequences of what they're doing and this was also really interesting to me.
32:27
[SPEAKER_01]: She said she said look talking to a child if you continue to do this I We'll get upset Is it okay if I get upset Because that is what is going to happen and so the kid now has the choice
32:45
[SPEAKER_02]: to continue down this path which they now know what it will bring or not right and she often she said often they be like no I don't want you upset okay great then please stop doing this thing right right fascinating again patience like I think of like parents like don't eat that you'll ruin your dinner the kid doesn't care if the dinner is ruined
33:06
[SPEAKER_03]: You know, like they don't care, they want the thing.
33:08
[SPEAKER_03]: So like you have to come up with like, okay, if you eat that, it's gonna really make me sad because I've spent hours on making this dinner for you.
33:16
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm as maybe a manipulation, sorry, gal.
33:19
[SPEAKER_03]: But like, I wanna have dinner with you.
33:21
[SPEAKER_03]: It's important that I have quality time with you.
33:23
[SPEAKER_03]: I want you to enjoy the dinner that I made, did it out like, if you eat that and then is it okay if I'm disappointed that you didn't enjoy the dinner I made?
33:30
[SPEAKER_03]: Okay, like those, I'm sure gales books are gonna be more articulate than I am.
33:33
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
33:34
[SPEAKER_02]: So go get them all.
33:35
[SPEAKER_02]: That said, what about you?
33:36
[SPEAKER_02]: What'd be the action that I did you love from your combo?
33:39
[SPEAKER_03]: how to choose, okay, when we are born, this is what Gale says.
33:43
[SPEAKER_03]: We are born, we have something called executive function skills.
33:47
[SPEAKER_03]: Gale said we need, we all need these skills for learning and for living, but in school and often at home, we expect children to have them instead of teaching them.
33:54
[SPEAKER_03]: So for Gale.
33:55
[SPEAKER_02]: So that we expect the kids to have the executive function skills, instead of teaching them executive function skills.
34:00
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.
34:01
[SPEAKER_03]: So she said, Gale said, the first one we have to teach is self-control.
34:06
[SPEAKER_03]: Then the next one is focus and attention, and then organization.
34:11
[SPEAKER_03]: So if parents would focus on teaching these skills, children would do better.
34:15
[SPEAKER_03]: And I think, I know that sounds like, and it's easy for me.
34:18
[SPEAKER_02]: Clearly in order.
34:19
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, it's, it's for self-control.
34:22
[SPEAKER_03]: Then you can teach focus and attention.
34:24
[SPEAKER_03]: And then you can teach organization.
34:25
[SPEAKER_03]: And I think like, what's so cool about that, it's one, it gives you a map, start with self-control.
34:33
[SPEAKER_03]: And then focus and attention,
34:35
[SPEAKER_03]: I think it's instead of like, I got to teach them how to like do their homework.
34:40
[SPEAKER_03]: It's like you got to teach them self-control so that they can.
34:43
[SPEAKER_03]: sit down, to do the homework, then you can teach him focus on attention, so they can do the homework and the organization, so they know what time to do the homework.
34:52
[SPEAKER_03]: When can they figure this, when is the best time for them?
34:55
[SPEAKER_03]: How do they manage their day?
34:57
[SPEAKER_03]: These are important things.
34:58
[SPEAKER_03]: I am really sad for people who don't know how to put their schedule together.
35:05
[SPEAKER_03]: That's sad, you know, because it's clearly frustrating.
35:09
[SPEAKER_03]: Then we have adults that we work with who have a really hard time figuring out how to organize,
35:13
[SPEAKER_03]: The things that they're doing are learning, and it's like, oh, they just weren't taught.
35:19
[SPEAKER_03]: And until learning that an older age is really difficult.
35:22
[SPEAKER_03]: So anyways.
35:23
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, well, I just lovely, again, I love the conversation.
35:28
[SPEAKER_02]: And I'm so excited that we were able to have be able to join the club.
35:32
[SPEAKER_03]: So all of this when you were a parent, I hope you pat yourself on the fucking back.
35:35
[SPEAKER_03]: Like I hope you go, this was the best episode for helping me celebrate how amazing I was as a parent.
35:42
[SPEAKER_03]: Because I do think that most parents do not give themselves enough credit either.
35:46
[SPEAKER_03]: So I'm not here to like harp on like you're doing a bad job.
35:49
[SPEAKER_02]: But like it did make me wonder if my parents had a method
35:52
[SPEAKER_02]: Like, you know, they're pretty analytical.
35:54
[SPEAKER_02]: Maybe they were intentional about some of this stuff, but if they did, I never had an conversation with them about it as an adult, but you know, it's intriguing.
36:02
[SPEAKER_02]: It's interesting.
36:03
[SPEAKER_03]: I mean, they might have, because they are analytical.
36:06
[SPEAKER_03]: I think like, there is something a little different about those of us who are raised, like, go outside and play to the lights turn off, and they're just definitely something about like, there's that real people like, why are you guys drinking from hoses?
36:17
[SPEAKER_03]: Like, it's like,
36:19
[SPEAKER_03]: because that's, we were had to play outside.
36:21
[SPEAKER_03]: What are you talking about?
36:22
[SPEAKER_03]: Of course we're talking from a house, you know?
36:25
[SPEAKER_03]: But the fact that people don't realize, I think that there was something about the playing outside that definitely created a lot of this executive function because they have to negotiate with other children of who's a charge, who's playing now.
36:37
[SPEAKER_03]: It's my turn.
36:38
[SPEAKER_02]: danger crossing roads by yourself.
36:41
[SPEAKER_03]: I do think that there's a difference now then there was and like oh my god we're 43 so you know like I do I do see a difference and I just what I when I really wanted is for people who have younger children wanting to empower you about what distressed about.
36:56
[SPEAKER_03]: And what not is stress about like Gale said it you shouldn't be stressing if the homework gets done like that's not a thing like this is where they're gonna Okay, let's go figure out why didn't get done.
37:07
[SPEAKER_03]: Let's help you figure it out and then if you did this then pat yourself on the back and if you didn't We still love you.
37:14
[SPEAKER_03]: We love you and they're taking care of you and not me so
37:22
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm kidding.
37:23
[SPEAKER_03]: I'mlessly look.
37:24
[SPEAKER_03]: I love you guys so much.
37:25
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm less like you'll buy her bucks.
37:26
[SPEAKER_03]: Gail Hugman has a ton of things.
37:28
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh, yeah.
37:28
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, yeah.
37:28
[SPEAKER_02]: She had a couple of websites.
37:29
[SPEAKER_02]: So we're gonna put those into the show notes.
37:32
[SPEAKER_02]: Mm-hmm.
37:33
[SPEAKER_02]: I can't remember off the top of my head.
37:34
[SPEAKER_02]: But actually, I'm just gonna look.
37:35
[SPEAKER_02]: You know Hugman.
37:36
[SPEAKER_03]: her well yeah lesson alive dot com lesson alive dot com you guys are so honest and she did this stuff are are enjoyable to listen to she also said accent so my american friends i know you love it yeah and you can find a books at the endless bookcase dot com oh perfect yeah but i'm sure i'm sure i'm sure they're also on her lesson alive so we're gonna order to the
38:03
[SPEAKER_02]: And I'm Brad Crowell.
38:04
[SPEAKER_03]: Thank you so much for listening.
38:05
[SPEAKER_03]: She has the friend who needs to hear it share with a friend who's struggling with their kids right now.
38:09
[SPEAKER_03]: Hopefully this helps them and guilt.
38:11
[SPEAKER_03]: Thanks for being here.
38:12
[SPEAKER_03]: You didn't break the mold.
38:13
[SPEAKER_03]: Sorry, babe, but you're still badass and our eyes have an amazing day.
38:17
[SPEAKER_02]: Bye for now.
38:19
[SPEAKER_03]: That's all I got for this episode of The Be It Tell You See A Podcast, one thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review.
38:27
[SPEAKER_03]: And follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts.
38:31
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38:35
[SPEAKER_03]: I would love to know more about you, share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it, help us and others be a tell you see it.
38:43
[SPEAKER_03]: Have an awesome day.
38:46
[SPEAKER_03]: Be it till you see it is a production of the blue pod cast network.
38:50
[SPEAKER_03]: If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at plus one three one oh nine oh five five three four or send a DM on Instagram at be it pod.
39:01
[SPEAKER_02]: It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Leslie Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.
39:06
[SPEAKER_03]: It is transcribed, produced, and edited by the epic team at disenio.co.
39:11
[SPEAKER_02]: Our theme music is by Ellie at Apex production music, and our branding by designer and artist John Franco Chilfe.
39:18
[SPEAKER_03]: Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.
39:21
[SPEAKER_02]: Also, to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website.
39:25
[SPEAKER_02]: And finally, the Meredith route for keeping us all on point and on time.