Latest / Impact Ready / 165. Filters (and the Olympics)

Transcript

165. Filters (and the Olympics) · Impact Ready

• 0:02
  Welcome to Impact Ready, a show dedicated to helping you elevate
• 0:06
  your impact in the world. I'm Steph Safra, your host.
• 0:09
  Let's explore the power of showing up with intention and
• 0:12
  energy each day. This is for those who seek to
• 0:15
  make life truly meaningful. Get ready for impact.
• 0:22
  Hi, team. Welcome to the show.
• 0:24
  Last episode we talked about a formula in coaching.
• 0:28
  It's called CTFAR. It stands for circumstances
• 0:33
  trigger thoughts T lead to feelings F progressed to actions
• 0:38
  A which then lead to results R We talked about that formula so
• 0:42
  that we could understand what is the progression of how data
• 0:46
  comes in and how we end up with our outcomes.
• 0:50
  We also talked about how between circumstances, the very first
• 0:54
  step, and thoughts the second step, we have a filter.
• 0:58
  This is our perspective about what we're looking at based on
• 1:01
  our lived experiences, and we called it other things that
• 1:04
  could be our lens, it could be our negative stories, it could
• 1:07
  be limiting beliefs, it could be positive stories, but in
• 1:11
  general, we'll just refer to it as a filter.
• 1:13
  In this episode today I want to describe a little bit more about
• 1:18
  why understanding our filters is so important.
• 1:21
  Let's start with a little fact. The brain has over 11,000,000
• 1:25
  pieces of information coming in and it filters it down to 50 per
• 1:30
  second, 50 per second down from 11,000,000 pieces.
• 1:34
  That's major filtering and we're built that way on purpose
• 1:39
  because there's way too much data coming in for our brains to
• 1:42
  handle. Can you imagine having to think
• 1:45
  about 11,000,000 pieces of information coming in per
• 1:48
  second? That would take way too much
• 1:50
  energy. And so the brain is very
• 1:53
  adaptable. It's pretty genius.
• 1:55
  And it uses little Cheat Sheets and creates filters which seeks
• 1:59
  efficiency. And so we use those filters to
• 2:02
  very quickly determine, OK, which information or data do I
• 2:05
  want to pay attention to and which do I want to ignore?
• 2:09
  This is what we call the reticular activating system, the
• 2:12
  Ras. It's, we're seeing it at work.
• 2:14
  In this example. The Ras is a function of the
• 2:17
  brain that filters information. And remember, our brain is
• 2:22
  always filtering out specific types of information and
• 2:24
  prioritizing certain types over others.
• 2:27
  For example, it always filters out messages of alarm.
• 2:31
  And that makes sense, right? It's for survival.
• 2:33
  So we want to know when there's danger or when there's some sort
• 2:36
  of sense of urgency or alarm for us to pay attention to.
• 2:40
  Our brain is also always paying attention to our own name.
• 2:43
  And so if our name is said in the middle of a sentence, it
• 2:45
  will filter that information out pretty quickly.
• 2:49
  Now, why do we talk about filters so much on this podcast?
• 2:53
  Because our perception of reality and the present is a big
• 2:59
  part of what allows us to have impact, to be creative around
• 3:04
  our future, to be successful in our relationships, in our work.
• 3:09
  And we have filters about everything.
• 3:11
  We have filters about ourselves. It might sound like I am a
• 3:15
  really confident person, or I'm not very good at that, or I
• 3:19
  don't really like this food, or I don't I'm really good at
• 3:23
  traveling. Those might be beliefs about
• 3:25
  ourselves, AKA filters. We have filters about other
• 3:27
  people. We have filters about work,
• 3:30
  about money, about God or spirituality.
• 3:33
  We have filters about what's possible in our lives, about the
• 3:36
  relationships that we have. I mean, the list goes on and on.
• 3:39
  And here's the thing. We treat our filters as if
• 3:44
  they're our reality, and most people are completely unaware of
• 3:49
  their filters. A lot of people talk about this
• 3:53
  idea. Brené Brown talks about filters
• 3:56
  in kind of a different way. She acknowledges that everybody
• 4:00
  is telling themselves a different story in her words.
• 4:04
  And she describes that when you're in an argument or you're
• 4:07
  having a conversation with somebody, for example, one of
• 4:10
  the things that you can say is the story that I'm telling
• 4:13
  myself is XYZ. And that acknowledges that your
• 4:17
  reality might not be the other person's reality.
• 4:21
  And if you could acknowledge that we all have a different
• 4:24
  story that we're telling, or put another way, we all have a
• 4:27
  different filter. We're layering over our
• 4:30
  circumstances. We can be a little bit more
• 4:32
  accurate and simply describing our own story, our own filter,
• 4:38
  rather than being presumptuous about someone else's, can make
• 4:42
  the conversation go a little better, can make you a more self
• 4:47
  aware person. Here's a really exciting thing
• 4:50
  about filters. They're not unchangeable.
• 4:54
  And I think this is really important.
• 4:56
  This is something that I want every coaching client to know.
• 5:00
  Your filters are not unchangeable.
• 5:02
  We don't have to keep looking through the same lens all the
• 5:05
  time. And that's really good because a
• 5:08
  lot of our lenses, a lot of our filters are created again, when
• 5:12
  we're young with incomplete context and an underdeveloped
• 5:16
  brain. I'm sure like most people,
• 5:20
  you've had an experience in your life that was a bit of an aha
• 5:23
  moment, or maybe you had some sort of an epiphany, or maybe
• 5:27
  you had an experience and it unknowingly shifted your filter.
• 5:31
  It changed the way that you saw reality.
• 5:34
  I can think of many experiences in my life that shifted the way
• 5:38
  that I saw reality. It effectively changed my filter
• 5:41
  and I didn't even know that that was going to happen.
• 5:46
  The reason I think this is so important is because if we
• 5:49
  change our filters, we can change our future.
• 5:53
  And I'll explain this a little bit more.
• 5:55
  I'll give you an analogy that Jason Jaggard uses in his book
• 5:58
  he wrote Beyond High Performance.
• 6:01
  Imagine that you want to get from LA to New York City.
• 6:05
  Well, if that's the case, you're not going to care or notice any
• 6:11
  of the highways that would take you to Seattle.
• 6:14
  Why? Because you're not trying to get
• 6:16
  to Seattle, so you are not going to pay attention to that
• 6:19
  information. Those highways are going to get
• 6:21
  filtered out of your brain. All right, consider the same
• 6:25
  situation. You want to get from Los Angeles
• 6:28
  to New York City, but your filter doesn't include flying in
• 6:32
  a plane. OK, then your present will be
• 6:36
  full of planning a week long road trip versus one day in an
• 6:39
  airport. You wouldn't even consider any
• 6:42
  flights because you're not looking for those.
• 6:45
  You're filtering them out. Again, same example, but switch
• 6:49
  up your intention and your desire.
• 6:50
  What if you said you want a future that gets you from LA to
• 6:54
  New York in one day? OK, now immediately driving
• 6:59
  across the country is out of the question because that would take
• 7:01
  much longer than one day. And so you have to find another
• 7:04
  way to create that future, which would likely have you looking at
• 7:08
  flights. In this case, you can see how
• 7:11
  the filter helps determine our future.
• 7:14
  It's not just the present that determines the future.
• 7:17
  And this actually can go in the opposite direction as well.
• 7:20
  Our future can influence our filters.
• 7:25
  If we want to get to New York and it doesn't involve flying in
• 7:28
  a plane, our filters say get ready to drive.
• 7:33
  Now. This concept is a really big
• 7:34
  reason why we talk about visualizing your future or
• 7:38
  thinking about what you really desire in your life, getting
• 7:41
  clear on what you need or what you want, setting goals, being
• 7:44
  intentional, being purposeful about what you create, because
• 7:47
  all of those things speak to your future.
• 7:50
  And you can leverage your future as a filter.
• 7:54
  If you create a desired future in your mind, what you want for
• 7:57
  your life, if you can make that your dominant filter, that means
• 8:02
  that your brain is going to start emphasizing certain
• 8:05
  information and data that matches that future and minimize
• 8:10
  other types of information. It might emphasize the people
• 8:14
  who can help you get to that future and minimize the people
• 8:17
  who don't want to help you. It might emphasize the skills
• 8:21
  that you need or the areas that you need to grow, as well as the
• 8:24
  beliefs that you need to shore up.
• 8:26
  It will also simultaneously minimize or delete the beliefs
• 8:30
  that you carry around about yourself that say, oh, you can't
• 8:34
  grow or you can't gain that skill, or you can't create
• 8:36
  certain relationships with people that will help you.
• 8:39
  Your brain will filter out the information that won't help you
• 8:44
  get to your desired future. Do you see how powerful that is
• 8:48
  now? If you don't believe me, think
• 8:50
  about a time where you really wanted something, really wanted
• 8:54
  something in your life. Maybe it was a fancy espresso
• 8:58
  machine. Maybe it was finding the right
• 9:01
  doctor for yourself. Or maybe it was traveling
• 9:05
  somewhere you really wanted to go, like Croatia.
• 9:08
  Maybe it was hiring a top sales manager for your company because
• 9:12
  your top line revenue depended on it.
• 9:15
  Think of a time when you wanted something so bad that you were
• 9:19
  envisioning it all the time. And now think about how that
• 9:22
  became your top priority and how you started to find ways to get
• 9:28
  to a solution. How you started to think about
• 9:30
  ways to make it work, ways that you maybe hadn't even thought of
• 9:34
  before. Things you wouldn't have even
• 9:36
  entertained before you decided I really want this thing that was
• 9:41
  you starting with the future that you desired and creating
• 9:45
  filters as a result of that. That then changed your present
• 9:50
  and ultimately led to that manifestation of the future you
• 9:53
  wanted. That's your brain at work and
• 9:56
  that's the power of filters in a desired future.
• 10:02
  I'll give you, I'll give you an example, like real time examples
• 10:05
  so you can integrate this because I know some of this can
• 10:08
  feel a little bit abstract when you're just talking about all
• 10:12
  these words, filters, future desires, all that stuff.
• 10:16
  OK, so back in 2010, the Winter Olympics were in Vancouver, BC
• 10:20
  and Whistler. And it had always been a dream
• 10:24
  of mine to go to the Olympics and having them so close to my
• 10:26
  home base of Portland, OR. It felt like this catalyst that
• 10:31
  I needed to try to make it happen and start to think a
• 10:35
  little bit differently. Prior to that, I was like, oh,
• 10:37
  I'll never be able to go to the Olympics.
• 10:39
  Like that's something that is so far away from me.
• 10:42
  That's something other people do.
• 10:44
  There's so many reasons why that wouldn't be possible for me.
• 10:46
  But because it just so happened that they were in Whistler, I
• 10:50
  was like, oh, that's pretty close.
• 10:52
  And then I realized that I had five or six friends that I knew
• 10:56
  really well from my time studying abroad in Australia who
• 11:00
  are working at the Olympics. They all work for events
• 11:03
  companies and they all happen to be working in Whistler.
• 11:07
  And even though up until this point going to the Olympics felt
• 11:10
  unattainable, I started to think differently in that moment.
• 11:16
  I was 28 years old at the time. I didn't have a lot of money.
• 11:19
  I had just opened up my acupuncture practice.
• 11:22
  I was living off of a business loan that I had taken out.
• 11:26
  I certainly didn't have a lot of experience going to events like
• 11:29
  the Olympics or trying to pull off a big trip like this.
• 11:33
  It felt pretty unattainable up until this point, but I started
• 11:37
  envisioning myself being there. And it really helped me that I
• 11:40
  had these friends who were up there saying you should come,
• 11:43
  you should come to the Olympics of court.
• 11:45
  And they were all Australians. So Australians, they, they
• 11:47
  travel everywhere. They don't have a lot of
• 11:49
  limiting beliefs about this. They're like, oh, we'll just
• 11:51
  make it happen. And so I started to embrace that
• 11:54
  perspective and I started seeing myself up there.
• 11:58
  It started to make me wonder, what if I could make this happen
• 12:00
  now? I had all these reasons in my
• 12:03
  mind that it wouldn't work out. It was really far.
• 12:06
  I couldn't afford plane tickets, I'd never driven to Canada, I
• 12:09
  didn't think there'd be any hotels to stay in, it would be
• 12:11
  incredibly expensive, yadda yadda.
• 12:14
  So many reasons. But I started asking my friends
• 12:18
  about what it might look like to come up and visit them and stay
• 12:22
  up there. And as soon as I opened my mind
• 12:24
  to the possibility of going, things started to open up.
• 12:28
  I started talking to my brother. He's two years younger than me.
• 12:31
  And I was like, Dave, would you ever want to go to the Olympics?
• 12:34
  And he was like, oh, my God, let's make it happen.
• 12:36
  And I was like, OK, I have a wing man, this is great.
• 12:39
  And before long, we had a plan to drive to Whistler ourselves.
• 12:42
  We couldn't afford plane tickets, but that was no big
• 12:44
  deal. We're like, oh, we'll just
• 12:45
  drive. And we'll stay with one of our
• 12:47
  friends in her hotel room and we'll get to go to some of the
• 12:50
  events with their comped event tickets.
• 12:55
  We knew there was a road blockade that didn't allow cars
• 12:59
  to drive from BC to Whistler during the day because there
• 13:02
  were Olympic events happening. So we decided that we would
• 13:05
  leave at 9:00 PM to drive up there, drive the seven or 8
• 13:09
  hours to get to Whistler, and we would miss the road blockade
• 13:12
  because we'd be driving that specific road at 2:00 AM.
• 13:16
  When it was all said and done, my brother and I ended up
• 13:20
  driving to Whistler. We got to stay at an amazing
• 13:23
  hotel with a friend. We had a free parking pass
• 13:26
  because my friends had a pass. We got to go to all of the
• 13:29
  private parties that were happening up there in Olympic
• 13:33
  Village. We saw a medal ceremony where
• 13:36
  Usher sang. We got to go to 3 Olympic events
• 13:39
  including the bobsled which was on the top of my list.
• 13:42
  And to top it all off, we got to go to the closing ceremonies in
• 13:47
  BC and watch the final Olympic gold hockey match between USA
• 13:53
  and Canada. It was hands down on the most
• 13:56
  exciting, most memorable times of my life.
• 14:00
  Hands down. I can still remember it so well,
• 14:03
  even though it was 15 years ago. And it was all because I opened
• 14:07
  my mind to a new future, one that then allowed me to filter
• 14:12
  out all the beliefs and the doubts and the limiting factors
• 14:15
  that would have kept me from being able to go up there
• 14:18
  previously. I started to filter information
• 14:23
  that allowed me to find people to help make it a reality, to
• 14:26
  find my brother who wanted to go, to find solutions to parking
• 14:31
  and hotels and ended up not being that expensive because we
• 14:35
  had so much help and support from all of our friends.
• 14:39
  And there were so many little connections that allowed us to
• 14:43
  be able to enjoy this event even though we were just graduated
• 14:46
  students. And that story is just one of
• 14:50
  the stories that I've experienced in my life where
• 14:54
  when I change the future, the desired future, my filters start
• 14:58
  to change. And it supports me getting to
• 15:00
  where I want to go. The potential here is
• 15:03
  overwhelming for what we could create in our lives simply by
• 15:06
  starting to think about our filters.
• 15:09
  And the great thing is, this is really not very hard at all.
• 15:13
  Because the second you start thinking about your desired
• 15:16
  future is the second your brain starts to filter.
• 15:20
  You don't even have to do anything, it just happens
• 15:22
  automatically. That's how amazing your brain
• 15:25
  is. So this week, I challenge you to
• 15:29
  start paying attention, to try to become acutely aware of what
• 15:33
  your filters are, but more importantly, what your desired
• 15:36
  future is. Because if you can think about
• 15:39
  it and visualize it and spend time enjoying it, your brain
• 15:43
  will do the rest of the work. I hope this helps.
• 15:47
  I hope this spurs on some insights for you.
• 15:49
  I'm so glad you're here. Thank you for listening and as
• 15:52
  always team, thank you for being ready to Impact.
• 15:56
  Thanks for listening to Impact Ready.
• 15:58
  I hope today's episode inspired you to own your impact and
• 16:01
  recognize that you are powerful. By elevating our energy and
• 16:04
  awareness, we can create exponential change in this life.
• 16:08
  If you enjoyed today's insights, share them with a friend and
• 16:11
  subscribe to the show for more. I truly appreciate you.
• 16:14
  Thanks again for being here.