Latest / Jess Ask / The Legacy You're Forgetting to Build | Ft. Garrick C. Francis | EP166

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The Legacy You're Forgetting to Build | Ft. Garrick C. Francis | EP166 · Jess Ask

0:01
Speaker 1: Yo, it's your girl, Jessica and Smith and you already
0:10
Speaker 1: know that you've entered the safe space for influencers to decompress.
0:14
Speaker 2: Have fun and just ask God for another Do you
0:18
Speaker 2: already know what it is? And then you know it's
0:20
Speaker 2: about to get real.
0:22
Speaker 3: To be sure to show your girl the love and
0:25
Speaker 3: like coming and subscribe God for another day.
0:30
Speaker 4: Hey, hey, I know we could be another way.
0:37
Speaker 5: It's a new weeknd.
0:38
Speaker 6: Just as the podcast the safe space where transparency means transformation.
0:42
Speaker 6: It's your girl, Jessica, as Smith and I do nothing
0:46
Speaker 6: without my girl.
0:48
Speaker 5: That's a right, a right.
0:53
Speaker 6: By boom boom boom boom boom boom boom like a
0:57
Speaker 6: boom I wish I Hey, you know I had said
1:02
Speaker 6: one time I was going to did it just James
1:04
Speaker 6: Brownie did that? Was that?
1:06
Speaker 2: Hey?
1:07
Speaker 5: Hey, it just it just came out of a spirit,
1:10
Speaker 5: came out because you watch your mouth.
1:13
Speaker 6: But hey, you know, I'm really starting to enjoy this
1:17
Speaker 6: little jingle jangle situation. Oh so you're enjoying the song
1:21
Speaker 6: that I am? You know, I you know, I'm kind
1:23
Speaker 6: of liking it a little bit a little bit. Get
1:25
Speaker 6: you loose and free and get you in the mindset
1:27
Speaker 6: of we about to we got to have a conversation.
1:29
Speaker 6: We're about to have a conversation, desire. How are you
1:32
Speaker 6: feeling today.
1:33
Speaker 5: Man, today.
1:36
Speaker 6: I'm thinking because I want to be honest. Okay, I'm
1:40
Speaker 6: actually really good, Jessica. Okay, you know we talked about
1:44
Speaker 6: I'm sure at this point people know we you know
1:46
Speaker 6: how we record, right, and so today started off as
1:49
Speaker 6: a day. But you know, I'm very grateful that we
1:52
Speaker 6: didn't allow the start of the thing to dictate the
1:55
Speaker 6: end of the thing.
1:56
Speaker 5: Yeah, you know what I'm saying. It was a little
1:58
Speaker 5: it was a little challenging tech thing. You know, all
2:00
Speaker 5: the things was happening. But I was like, oh, this
2:02
Speaker 5: is gonna be good.
2:03
Speaker 6: All these all these days about to be real good,
2:05
Speaker 6: and they have been just that. And the conversation we're
2:07
Speaker 6: about to have now is it's to you what you said.
2:11
Speaker 6: The start of the thing is not the end of
2:12
Speaker 6: the thing, and we have an opportunity to shift thejectory
2:16
Speaker 6: of the legacy we want to leave.
2:17
Speaker 5: And the person that we have here as a.
2:20
Speaker 6: Guest today is super special to me because he's I know,
2:24
Speaker 6: y'all heard me talk about me being in a seven
2:26
Speaker 6: figure podcast community, not only being but having the opportunity.
2:30
Speaker 5: To coach every Wednesday.
2:32
Speaker 6: He is in this community. I've seen him grow. I
2:35
Speaker 6: remember when he was first starting. I remember, you know,
2:38
Speaker 6: all the questions that he had, and to see him executing,
2:43
Speaker 6: like in the confidence that he's executing, it's just very rewarding.
2:48
Speaker 6: And so this one's personal. I don't invite just anybody,
2:53
Speaker 6: and so for me to invite him, just know he
2:55
Speaker 6: cares on oil. Okay, I would call him a legacy coach, right.
2:59
Speaker 6: He teaches on legacy, see, not just in a financial standpoint,
3:02
Speaker 6: but mentally, spiritually and emotionally, and he really centers people
3:06
Speaker 6: back into the ground of family, dynamic, the ecosystem of family.
3:10
Speaker 6: And so I would like to introduce the sum and
3:12
Speaker 6: present the others. The host of Inherits Inheritance to Income podcast,
3:19
Speaker 6: mister Garrick Francis.
3:25
Speaker 5: Look at it though he looks nice. Look at the
3:27
Speaker 5: face slop.
3:29
Speaker 6: Don't don't get it twisted though, no matter, God come
3:33
Speaker 6: with all.
3:34
Speaker 5: I'm so proud of you, Gary.
3:36
Speaker 7: Thank you, thank you. Look, it's when you hang around
3:39
Speaker 7: people who have the right spirit, some of it has
3:43
Speaker 7: to pour into you. And so you and Nalla and
3:46
Speaker 7: the whole community. It is hard not to want to
3:50
Speaker 7: execute when you have people who are pouring so much
3:53
Speaker 7: into you.
3:54
Speaker 3: Yeah.
3:54
Speaker 6: Yeah, like I'm just I'm just I really I really
3:58
Speaker 6: value what you you bring to the podcasting world because
4:05
Speaker 6: I think that we talk about mindset all the time
4:08
Speaker 6: and then you say, you won't finances, you you won't
4:10
Speaker 6: change your finance, you won't change this, but you really
4:13
Speaker 6: get into the nitty gritty of family.
4:16
Speaker 5: This is a quote from you.
4:17
Speaker 6: You say what you build is not a legacy when
4:21
Speaker 6: people aren't prepared to carry it.
4:24
Speaker 7: Right, that's right, that's right.
4:27
Speaker 5: Let's talk about that.
4:28
Speaker 6: Because we talk about this word legacy, can you break
4:31
Speaker 6: down what what legacy really is and what what's the
4:35
Speaker 6: what we miss in the in the building of something
4:39
Speaker 6: to transition to legacy.
4:41
Speaker 7: Right, Well, legacy starts a lot earlier than we think,
4:45
Speaker 7: right legacy. Legacy begins when we make a decision that
4:50
Speaker 7: affects someone else, and so we have to think about
4:53
Speaker 7: We always think about legacy as an asset, whether it's
4:56
Speaker 7: Big Mama's house or whether it's something we hand down.
5:00
Speaker 7: But the legacy is in our values, The legacy is
5:02
Speaker 7: in our name, it's in our culture. It's in our family,
5:05
Speaker 7: it's in knowing who we are and whose we are,
5:08
Speaker 7: and those are the things that if we hand those
5:10
Speaker 7: things down, then the next generation doesn't have to start
5:13
Speaker 7: from ground zero and rebuild everything. And so when we
5:17
Speaker 7: think about legacy, what I want people to think about
5:20
Speaker 7: is what are the things that you got from your
5:24
Speaker 7: grandmother or your great grandmother or your coach that have
5:28
Speaker 7: been poured into you that you are stewarding for the
5:31
Speaker 7: next generation, Because that's what has to happen. Your legacy
5:35
Speaker 7: is activated by the next generation. It's not you. Your
5:38
Speaker 7: legacy becomes activated when the next generation is prepared to
5:42
Speaker 7: carry it forward. And that's how you live on people
5:45
Speaker 7: concerned about living on. You live on through the people
5:48
Speaker 7: you prepare to move forward.
5:51
Speaker 5: So in what does that preparation look like.
5:56
Speaker 7: It's different for different people. I think when you're thinking
6:00
Speaker 7: about a family, a family is a system, right, A
6:03
Speaker 7: lot of people don't think about it. A family is
6:05
Speaker 7: a system. And so in that family you have people
6:08
Speaker 7: playing different roles. You have people who are peacemakers, you
6:11
Speaker 7: have people who are facilitators, you have people who are leaders.
6:15
Speaker 7: And so when you're doing that people you have to
6:18
Speaker 7: have some clarity about who's good at what, what is
6:21
Speaker 7: your role within the family or the organization. And when
6:26
Speaker 7: we have some clarity around those roles, we can start
6:29
Speaker 7: having what I call unaccustomed conversations. And those are the
6:33
Speaker 7: ways that we move people forward. Not uncomfortable, but unaccustomed.
6:37
Speaker 6: Break down down a little bit more unaccustomed conversation.
6:40
Speaker 5: What does that look like?
6:42
Speaker 7: So in our families, for instance, we are we're not
6:46
Speaker 7: used to talking about legacy because we equate legacy with death,
6:51
Speaker 7: and we don't like to talk about death, right, But
6:54
Speaker 7: legacy is about life. Legacy is about living. Let me
6:57
Speaker 7: tell you a story. So my mom said to me
7:00
Speaker 7: shortly she died four days shorter her ninetieth birthday, and
7:03
Speaker 7: so shortly before she died a few months she said,
7:07
Speaker 7: I don't want people to forget me. And I told her,
7:12
Speaker 7: no one will forget you. I'll make sure of that.
7:15
Speaker 7: And so what she gave me was her values and
7:19
Speaker 7: her culture and her name. And I give that to
7:22
Speaker 7: my children. But the conversations that you have to have
7:26
Speaker 7: have to be about what values do we want to
7:30
Speaker 7: hand down, What are the intangibles, what are the things
7:35
Speaker 7: that we have of heart value? In our family that
7:37
Speaker 7: we want to pass on. What are the struggles, What
7:41
Speaker 7: are the we don't like to share struggles. So what
7:44
Speaker 7: are the struggles that we've had as a family that
7:47
Speaker 7: got us to where we are today that will allow
7:49
Speaker 7: us to move forward in the future. And So if
7:52
Speaker 7: we don't start having some of these unaccustomed conversations around
7:55
Speaker 7: the family boardroom, the family table, then the young people
7:59
Speaker 7: will never know how to move forward, and they'll never
8:04
Speaker 7: value what they've been given. And so that's the way
8:07
Speaker 7: I look at it. I think that there's an old
8:10
Speaker 7: saying that says, or it came around in the sixties,
8:13
Speaker 7: it says, when an elder dies, a library burns to
8:16
Speaker 7: the ground. And we can't let that wisdom die with
8:21
Speaker 7: the elders. It has to be passed on through those
8:24
Speaker 7: unaccustomed conversations, and we have to make them comfortable.
8:28
Speaker 6: So, man, you're already talking good y'all. I hope y'all
8:31
Speaker 6: ready to write some stuff down, because you really you're
8:36
Speaker 6: not just a you're not a complainer of legacy or
8:40
Speaker 6: the lag of thereof You really teach people how to
8:46
Speaker 6: build intentionally for the legacy a right. One of the
8:50
Speaker 6: things I'm curious about Gary. Is the reasoning behind the
8:56
Speaker 6: difficulty of these conversations that you're bringing up. What do
8:59
Speaker 6: you find and that's consistently coming up? That that's the
9:02
Speaker 6: resistance of leaning into these maybe even uncomfortable conversations that
9:09
Speaker 6: we might need to have around the family business table.
9:15
Speaker 7: I think families, and especially some of the families in
9:18
Speaker 7: our community, don't like to talk about the hard times.
9:24
Speaker 1: Right.
9:24
Speaker 7: As parents, we don't necessarily want to share with our
9:27
Speaker 7: children how hard it was. We want them to step
9:31
Speaker 7: over the missteps that we had. We're trying to create
9:33
Speaker 7: a better life. But the better life that we're creating
9:37
Speaker 7: is because we went through those struggles. God didn't put
9:39
Speaker 7: us through the test, right, We went through the tests
9:43
Speaker 7: so we could be prepared for today. And so we
9:45
Speaker 7: don't like to talk about the struggles. And then, from
9:47
Speaker 7: from a younger person's standpoint, my observation is is that
9:52
Speaker 7: we feel as though we're overstepping our bounds. Right, we
9:55
Speaker 7: got we have to be respectful. We can't talk about
9:58
Speaker 7: those things, we can't ask about those things, and so
10:01
Speaker 7: we feel like we have to have permission to ask
10:06
Speaker 7: about those things. And so it's like when you sit
10:09
Speaker 7: down at the table and you say to your dad,
10:11
Speaker 7: tell me the three hardest things in your life. It's
10:15
Speaker 7: going to be a painful conversation, but it's a conversation
10:20
Speaker 7: that will benefit you and it will release him right
10:26
Speaker 7: to be able to give you more of what happened.
10:34
Speaker 6: Hold that last line just took me. It will benefit me,
10:39
Speaker 6: but it will release him. What does that release look
10:44
Speaker 6: like for parents that especially with the parents that are
10:48
Speaker 6: listening right now, What does that release look like? Because
10:50
Speaker 6: I know there's some association with things that when you
10:54
Speaker 6: think about your when we think about the ecosystem, we
10:57
Speaker 6: think about the child thinking of the parent.
11:00
Speaker 5: As their sup their Superman, they're superwoman.
11:03
Speaker 6: And you as a parent, that's you kind of take
11:06
Speaker 6: I would you know, I'm not I'm a dog mall shout.
11:09
Speaker 5: Out to the dog walls and dog parents.
11:11
Speaker 6: But I can only imagine how much pride you take
11:14
Speaker 6: into making the superman super woman identify your work successfully
11:24
Speaker 6: and to find out that the cape has not always
11:27
Speaker 6: been on, or my cape is torn, or my cape
11:30
Speaker 6: is dingy, that it seems like.
11:33
Speaker 5: There's a fear that's attached to that.
11:35
Speaker 6: So how do you coach people through the releasing process
11:38
Speaker 6: as parents?
11:40
Speaker 7: Absolutely absolutely. I think we have to identify what I
11:44
Speaker 7: call what gap we're in? Right, we have to think
11:47
Speaker 7: about it. Are we in are we in a lost
11:50
Speaker 7: gap that some what event triggered us? What happened to
11:53
Speaker 7: put us into this place? This this place of fear
11:57
Speaker 7: and of hurt? What's going on? So when I talk
12:01
Speaker 7: to people, it is really thinking about what do you
12:04
Speaker 7: want to step into? What are you waiting to step into,
12:07
Speaker 7: and what do you need to release to be able
12:09
Speaker 7: to go there? Because if you have been working for
12:12
Speaker 7: twenty or thirty years, whether it's in a corporate job
12:15
Speaker 7: or a small business or just to lead your family,
12:18
Speaker 7: you have filled yourself up with those responsibilities and now
12:22
Speaker 7: you're looking to step into something else, but you don't
12:24
Speaker 7: have room. You have to make room. I mean, I
12:28
Speaker 7: know you all have talked about, you know, your gifts
12:30
Speaker 7: or make room for you, but you have to sometimes
12:33
Speaker 7: release some things out of your life to go where
12:37
Speaker 7: you're supposed to go. And even for parents or for
12:40
Speaker 7: founders of businesses, you have to be able to let
12:44
Speaker 7: go of some things, including those things that you don't
12:48
Speaker 7: really like to discuss, we don't want to discuss. I'll
12:52
Speaker 7: give you an example my mom know was coming of
12:57
Speaker 7: age in the nineteen thirties and forties. In fifties, she
13:00
Speaker 7: was a young woman in the nineteen Middle Agrialy in
13:03
Speaker 7: the nineteen sixties. She didn't love to talk about the
13:06
Speaker 7: stories of the civil rights struggle and the times that
13:09
Speaker 7: she was yelled at on a bus. She didn't like
13:12
Speaker 7: to talk about the times when but she told my
13:15
Speaker 7: granddaughter the story of when she was on that bus
13:19
Speaker 7: by herself and when people threatened her and called her names,
13:23
Speaker 7: and it hurt her. You could see it in her eyes.
13:26
Speaker 7: But she needed my daughter to know that story so
13:30
Speaker 7: that my daughter could progress forward. But I also released
13:34
Speaker 7: my mom to be able to tell that story and
13:37
Speaker 7: to move on and do other things she needed to do.
13:42
Speaker 6: That's so good, Gary, I think that is very important.
13:46
Speaker 6: What comes to mind, And I don't know if I've
13:49
Speaker 6: told you so. I used to have an organization called
13:52
Speaker 6: Naturally Devoted, right, and really the heartbeat of Naturally Devoted
13:55
Speaker 6: is really in just ask.
13:57
Speaker 5: I was just calling it a different thing at the time.
14:00
Speaker 6: And so when I was doing these blogs, there was
14:02
Speaker 6: one specific blog where I opened up about experiencing domestic violence, right,
14:09
Speaker 6: and it was after the fact that I had a
14:16
Speaker 6: conversation with my aunt. One thing me and my aunt
14:19
Speaker 6: liked this. I love her to death. And she's one
14:22
Speaker 6: that believes that when we don't have the conversation, we're
14:25
Speaker 6: not preparing the next generation. The legacy conversation. I like that,
14:29
Speaker 6: the legacy conversation. And so we were having a conversation.
14:34
Speaker 6: Her not knowing that I had experienced domestic violence because
14:37
Speaker 6: that was something I was ashamed of. She opened up
14:41
Speaker 6: to me and told me that there was there was
14:45
Speaker 6: between my grandparents. There was some domestic altercations that happened,
14:52
Speaker 6: and not just one over the other.
14:55
Speaker 5: They was at each other.
14:57
Speaker 6: They were at each other, but we never experienced that.
15:00
Speaker 6: We only experience of love because by the time the
15:01
Speaker 6: grandkids came, they overcame that that cycle.
15:06
Speaker 5: And so love.
15:07
Speaker 6: When I say love my grandparents now, love my grandparents now,
15:10
Speaker 6: don't look at them any differently. But I needed to
15:12
Speaker 6: know that to be free from what I had experienced,
15:15
Speaker 6: because if I had known that before, I feel like
15:18
Speaker 6: I would have known what to look out for. I
15:20
Speaker 6: feel like, no, before you even experience physical abuse, there's
15:26
Speaker 6: already mentally mental and emotional abuse, and there are cycles
15:31
Speaker 6: generational cycles that come up even when you hide the
15:36
Speaker 6: like especially when you hide the thing. And so now
15:39
Speaker 6: I'm so vocal about like my experience, not because I'm
15:42
Speaker 6: just so I'm so adamant about what I went through,
15:45
Speaker 6: but because I understand that if I can make sure
15:49
Speaker 6: that my daughter or my son.
15:53
Speaker 5: Doesn't experience this level of.
15:58
Speaker 6: Heartbreak and frustration, and then I feel like I've done
16:01
Speaker 6: my part. But I think that because I didn't know
16:04
Speaker 6: it was, it left me in shame too long.
16:08
Speaker 7: Your legacy, your legacy is not just in your house.
16:12
Speaker 7: Your legacy is also what you're doing behind that microphone.
16:16
Speaker 7: Right you are sharing your story with somebody out there
16:18
Speaker 7: who you'll never meet. You'll meet, but you're part of
16:22
Speaker 7: the legacy because you're pouring into them and you're giving
16:26
Speaker 7: them the strength to step forward and to say me too,
16:29
Speaker 7: that happened to me, It happened to her. And look
16:32
Speaker 7: at what she's doing, Look at how she's building. Look
16:36
Speaker 7: that's the bridge you're creating with somebody out there whose
16:39
Speaker 7: face you will never see. And you are leaving a
16:43
Speaker 7: legacy even that way. So it's not just inside, it's
16:46
Speaker 7: not just inside your family, right leave we leave legacies
16:51
Speaker 7: in other ways too, which is really important.
16:55
Speaker 6: You're talking good because I think that we limit we
16:59
Speaker 6: put a box around legacy.
17:00
Speaker 5: Like I said early in the conversation, we were.
17:02
Speaker 6: Talking about finances and not really understanding how impactful, like
17:07
Speaker 6: you said, leaving leaving a legacy, Like I don't think
17:11
Speaker 6: sometimes I don't mind myself of how impact makes legacy,
17:16
Speaker 6: like what we do, what we do on Wednesdays, or
17:19
Speaker 6: even even something simple as what we post. Right now,
17:25
Speaker 6: you get to control the legacy that you leave because
17:29
Speaker 6: of social media, you know what I'm saying, Like now,
17:31
Speaker 6: I didn't even I've never connected it into this conversation.
17:34
Speaker 6: Like social media is a legacy presenter. That's what's coming up.
17:39
Speaker 6: You would you agree with that?
17:39
Speaker 5: Like social media is a legacy presenter.
17:43
Speaker 7: It can be, Okay, it can It can be if
17:48
Speaker 7: you are your authentic self. Right, So if three generations
17:53
Speaker 7: from now, your great great grandchildren, your great great great grandchildren,
17:59
Speaker 7: somebody would have stop and ask them, tell me about
18:02
Speaker 7: Mama Jessica, Right, what would they say? You can design
18:07
Speaker 7: what they say. But if they go back and look
18:10
Speaker 7: at all this social media today, will they see what
18:12
Speaker 7: you want them to see? Or will you be trying
18:15
Speaker 7: to explain something to them that wasn't you. And so
18:19
Speaker 7: if being your authentic self when you're out there, yes,
18:22
Speaker 7: it does. But what I encourage people to do. We
18:25
Speaker 7: have all this social media, and I encourage people to
18:27
Speaker 7: do what I call family media. It's the phone in
18:30
Speaker 7: front of you. Sit down and record a letter to
18:33
Speaker 7: your great great grandchildren about what is important to you
18:38
Speaker 7: right now at this age. And so when they look
18:42
Speaker 7: at that one day, they will see what was important
18:45
Speaker 7: to you. They'll see the values, they'll see the culture,
18:48
Speaker 7: they'll see the pain in your face, they'll see the pause,
18:51
Speaker 7: they'll hear the voice. And so it's kind of as
18:54
Speaker 7: a virtual hug that you're sending two or three generations forward.
18:57
Speaker 7: And we don't and wet the power of the tech
19:00
Speaker 7: anology we have right now to leave a living legacy
19:03
Speaker 7: is untapped.
19:04
Speaker 5: Mm hmm.
19:06
Speaker 6: That that was good and that I'm glad that you
19:09
Speaker 6: built that from not just being a presenter, but you
19:14
Speaker 6: can allow it to be what it.
19:16
Speaker 5: Needs to be.
19:17
Speaker 6: I think that we have to take the responsibility of
19:20
Speaker 6: our presentation to the next level of authenticity.
19:24
Speaker 5: Authenticity that was about that.
19:27
Speaker 6: Look that word out, you know, I tell a word
19:34
Speaker 6: or you know something that I just feel like, I
19:39
Speaker 6: feel like you. I want to so many memories are
19:42
Speaker 6: comment up. We we have.
19:44
Speaker 5: Same side of family. I have this great great great
19:48
Speaker 5: grandfather and he is no y'all can google him. He was.
19:53
Speaker 6: He's known as the man that with the praying pigs
19:58
Speaker 6: in Mississippi and.
20:01
Speaker 5: It's on YouTube. I'm gonna have to send it to
20:03
Speaker 5: you after this, Geary, I'm gonna find it.
20:06
Speaker 6: And I think about that same Auntie showed it to
20:09
Speaker 6: us when we were younger.
20:11
Speaker 5: Didn't really understand the impact.
20:12
Speaker 6: But now when I watch it, I watch it, you know,
20:14
Speaker 6: I try to watch it probably several times throughout the
20:16
Speaker 6: year because it just reminds me of that the grace
20:20
Speaker 6: has been in my bloodline, that.
20:23
Speaker 5: That that we've been doing it.
20:25
Speaker 6: And so even like the power of prayer, the legacy
20:28
Speaker 6: of prayer, Like you watch him and he's making pigs
20:32
Speaker 6: pray and it's so funny. People think it's so funny.
20:35
Speaker 5: It's a fun fact. I make more of my dog.
20:40
Speaker 5: She prays it for her food.
20:41
Speaker 6: And that's literally what my great grand great grandfather was doing,
20:46
Speaker 6: making pigs pray before their food. And I think with
20:50
Speaker 6: even before like even knowing that, like just appreciating the
20:57
Speaker 6: valuing the experience. I think that's what I'm hearing you say.
21:01
Speaker 6: So far, we put so much value in like the
21:04
Speaker 6: tangible tools of legacy versus the experience experiences of the
21:08
Speaker 6: legacy we do.
21:12
Speaker 7: And one thing I like to say is that your
21:15
Speaker 7: children will, certainly one day, they may one day do
21:19
Speaker 7: what you say. They will certainly one day do what
21:23
Speaker 7: you do. Right, they will watch you more than they
21:27
Speaker 7: will listen to you, and so they will emulate you.
21:30
Speaker 7: They will. And so if you are showing forth to
21:32
Speaker 7: them your praying spirit, if you're showing forth, if you
21:36
Speaker 7: show if I show my son growing up that I
21:39
Speaker 7: open the door for my mother and I open the
21:41
Speaker 7: door for my wife, my son opens doors if I
21:45
Speaker 7: if I show a respect, my son's gonna show respect.
21:49
Speaker 7: They watch you, they do what you do. So part
21:51
Speaker 7: of your legacy is how you act and how you
21:53
Speaker 7: show your family, your children, your church, what it means
21:57
Speaker 7: to be a person of faith, what it means it
22:00
Speaker 7: means to be a mother, a father, a auntie, a
22:02
Speaker 7: community leader. And these are things we need to value
22:06
Speaker 7: as part of our legacy, and we need to write
22:07
Speaker 7: them down. We need to record them because we because oftentimes,
22:12
Speaker 7: you know, we transfer responsibility before we transfer assets and
22:15
Speaker 7: before we transfer titles. We start to give those things
22:19
Speaker 7: to people much sooner than maybe they're ready, but we
22:23
Speaker 7: start to we start to hand those things over, and
22:26
Speaker 7: so we have to make sure that we're walking right.
22:32
Speaker 5: Your language to identify.
22:37
Speaker 6: The eCos the family ecosystem. Like it's mind blowing you
22:43
Speaker 6: just you recently did a episode using the Jackson family
22:51
Speaker 6: as an example. When I say that was pure genius
22:57
Speaker 6: that I enjoyed, you know from a standpoint of like
23:01
Speaker 6: podcasts or whatever, like, Okay, the title was right, and
23:04
Speaker 6: then what you said supported the title. You want to
23:07
Speaker 6: head to set up front, like, hey, this is not gossip,
23:10
Speaker 6: this is not me going back and forth about the movie.
23:13
Speaker 5: I'm using this family as an example.
23:15
Speaker 6: The breakdown of everything just stuck with me. But there
23:19
Speaker 6: was one thing I just have to talk to you about,
23:22
Speaker 6: and that's that founder gravity. I have never in my
23:29
Speaker 6: life heard a turn like that, and I want us
23:33
Speaker 6: to get into it. So can you can you explain
23:35
Speaker 6: to the audience what is founder gravity and why is
23:41
Speaker 6: it important.
23:43
Speaker 7: Founder gravity is the idea that you build something and
23:47
Speaker 7: when you're a builder. You have to have things revolving
23:51
Speaker 7: around you. Everything needs. The strength of a small business
23:55
Speaker 7: or the strength of a family is often because there's
23:57
Speaker 7: one person who makes decisions, who sees the aspirations and
24:02
Speaker 7: the potential, who develops the talent, who decides to invest
24:06
Speaker 7: all of themselves into something, and it's necessary in that season.
24:11
Speaker 7: But as we move forward into the later seasons of life,
24:15
Speaker 7: that founder gravity becomes a trap and it traps the
24:19
Speaker 7: person who's the creator because they no longer they may
24:23
Speaker 7: not be able to step in what they need to
24:25
Speaker 7: step into, this idea of release to increase, They may
24:28
Speaker 7: not be able to move there. But what it also
24:31
Speaker 7: does to the people around you is it keeps you
24:35
Speaker 7: from being able to take off. It's like the planet system.
24:38
Speaker 7: It just keeps you in the orbit of the founder,
24:42
Speaker 7: and you can't and you can't get out of it,
24:44
Speaker 7: and the founder can't be released to do other things,
24:47
Speaker 7: and so you get in this vicious cycle of just
24:51
Speaker 7: not understanding what the next step is supposed to be.
24:54
Speaker 7: And so with a case of a person who's a
24:57
Speaker 7: really strong business owner, a strong pastor, a strong patriarch,
25:03
Speaker 7: a strong patriarch, if that person can't let go. If
25:07
Speaker 7: you can't prepare the next generation, if you can't prepare
25:11
Speaker 7: the handoff, then the possibility is that legacy dies and
25:18
Speaker 7: the people who want to receive it, if they're not
25:21
Speaker 7: allowed to grow, there can also be a lot of
25:25
Speaker 7: weight on their shoulders.
25:27
Speaker 6: But also, I think in that same sense of what
25:30
Speaker 6: you're talking about, let's say we're talking about founder gravity, right,
25:34
Speaker 6: and I want to use I'm going to lean into
25:36
Speaker 6: the example that you've already put out there because I
25:37
Speaker 6: want people to go to that episode. That episode was phenomenal.
25:41
Speaker 6: You hear me, absolutely phenomenal. So you use the example
25:45
Speaker 6: of Joe Jackson and you know him being able to
25:48
Speaker 6: see and I properly identify that my kids have more right,
25:52
Speaker 6: and so that would use the founder You use the
25:56
Speaker 6: founder gravity for that for the example with Joe Jackson,
26:03
Speaker 6: not only the ability to when like you used the
26:06
Speaker 6: example of when Michael wanted to leave right there, was
26:11
Speaker 6: felt like portrayal, but the other sense of Okay, let's
26:14
Speaker 6: say if we stay, does that mean.
26:17
Speaker 5: That I have to do it like the founder?
26:20
Speaker 6: Like, what's the what's the disconnect between okay? The what
26:24
Speaker 6: is there? And I understand the importance of the what,
26:26
Speaker 6: But what's the freedom of the how? How would you
26:31
Speaker 6: what would you say to that?
26:33
Speaker 7: So the so the how is in recognizing a friend
26:37
Speaker 7: of mine, Shakisha Morgan, the legacy counselor as a beautiful phrase,
26:41
Speaker 7: it's called building and bridging, right, So we we have
26:45
Speaker 7: to build, but if we don't bridge, then there's no handoff.
26:50
Speaker 7: There's no way to hand it to the next generation.
26:52
Speaker 7: So the founder who's in that situation, the Joe Jackson character,
26:56
Speaker 7: he created it, but he didn't know how to let
26:58
Speaker 7: it go. He didn't know how to let it go
27:02
Speaker 7: and to step into what was next. And so he
27:05
Speaker 7: wasn't empowering his children to take over the legacy that
27:10
Speaker 7: he was building. It felt personal to him. It felt
27:13
Speaker 7: as a betrayal to him. And at the same time
27:16
Speaker 7: you could see the weight on the children. They were
27:19
Speaker 7: respectful in a way. They didn't want to take away
27:22
Speaker 7: from him what he had built, but they wanted to
27:24
Speaker 7: build into other things. And so the how is back
27:28
Speaker 7: to these conversations we have to start having. The first
27:31
Speaker 7: conversation is not about control. The first conversation is about
27:37
Speaker 7: what do we both want for the future. When you
27:40
Speaker 7: sit down, when you sit down, and you're potentially going
27:44
Speaker 7: to be the person who carries forward that legacy. You
27:47
Speaker 7: might sit down with your parent or grandparent and the
27:50
Speaker 7: first question you might ask is, in five years from now,
27:53
Speaker 7: what does a good day look like for you? You're
27:58
Speaker 7: not asking about assets and I ask him about money,
28:00
Speaker 7: You're not asking about control. You're saying, in five years
28:03
Speaker 7: from now, what does a good day look like for you?
28:06
Speaker 7: And you're helping to create this conversation about what comes next,
28:12
Speaker 7: and then you can relate what that five years from
28:14
Speaker 7: now looks like for you. And so now you're sharing
28:18
Speaker 7: aspirations about your legacy. You're not sharing about who gets what,
28:22
Speaker 7: or who controls or who gets this house or who
28:25
Speaker 7: gets that piece of the legacy. You're really thinking about
28:29
Speaker 7: how how do we preserve what you have built and
28:33
Speaker 7: how do we bridge to the next generation.
28:36
Speaker 6: Man, Man, this is so good. You got you have
28:39
Speaker 6: my mind going, Gary, I have so what I just
28:42
Speaker 6: thought about was like how you said earlier, that is
28:46
Speaker 6: not just like within the family, right that we can
28:49
Speaker 6: experience different people. And I have a spiritual mother in
28:51
Speaker 6: defund me and one of the things that she does
28:55
Speaker 6: will will randomly, she'll rendomly call me or I'll rental
29:00
Speaker 6: to be with her and we do an activity right
29:03
Speaker 6: and man, this is so good. And I specifically remember
29:10
Speaker 6: us playing Connect four.
29:14
Speaker 5: We were playing Connect. She has the big the big Connect.
29:17
Speaker 6: Four, it's not small, the big connect for it. So
29:19
Speaker 6: since she was like, let's play, let's play Connect for
29:21
Speaker 6: and I was like, okay, I'm thinking she doesn't want
29:23
Speaker 6: to beat me because she's really good at everything.
29:25
Speaker 5: Like she's really good at everything.
29:28
Speaker 6: And so she did actually beat me, but it wasn't
29:31
Speaker 6: as easy as I thought it was gonna be. And
29:36
Speaker 6: she we ended the game as just I'm really impressed
29:40
Speaker 6: with you. I was like, for what and she says,
29:43
Speaker 6: I wanted to play with you because he taught me
29:45
Speaker 6: a lot about how you think. And she was like,
29:48
Speaker 6: you're you're very strategic in your movement and she started
29:51
Speaker 6: talking to me. I was like, how did you get
29:54
Speaker 6: all of that out of that? But even thinking about
29:58
Speaker 6: her and her legacy, it's almost like, can I extend
30:04
Speaker 6: myln Can I trust Jessica when I'm not in the room,
30:08
Speaker 6: Can I can I see? Can she see the things
30:12
Speaker 6: or be patient with herself enough to maneuver and gather
30:16
Speaker 6: the information? So at any given point. If I'm with her,
30:19
Speaker 6: I need to be prepared to answer what just happened?
30:22
Speaker 6: Like if I'm watching and witnessing her move and calculated
30:26
Speaker 6: rooms and all that stuff, I have to say, Okay,
30:28
Speaker 6: what She'll always ask.
30:30
Speaker 5: Me, what just happened? What do you think of just
30:33
Speaker 5: just happen? Why do you think?
30:34
Speaker 6: I respond it this way, and I'll respond and she'll
30:37
Speaker 6: give me her feedback. I think that's one of the
30:40
Speaker 6: most healthy things, the healthiest thing I have ever experienced
30:44
Speaker 6: in my life. And now I didn't know that was
30:46
Speaker 6: a legacy thing. After listening to you say, hey, what
30:51
Speaker 6: for five years from now? What's a good day to you?
30:53
Speaker 6: What they has that has to do with legacy?
30:58
Speaker 5: We don't connect.
30:59
Speaker 6: Those guys, And now we have an opportunity to be
31:02
Speaker 6: more intentional with our day to day.
31:06
Speaker 5: I wonder what your.
31:08
Speaker 6: Your intentionality looks like from when you started out as
31:11
Speaker 6: a parent to now. You said you've been a parent
31:13
Speaker 6: for about thirty five years now, right.
31:16
Speaker 7: Get married for thirty five years, been a parent for
31:19
Speaker 7: my son's twenty five. My daughter turned twenty one, and
31:22
Speaker 7: I turned sixty this year, so it's a big year.
31:25
Speaker 7: So yeah, I think you know, when you talk about
31:29
Speaker 7: intentionality as a parent, the beautiful thing about my podcast
31:35
Speaker 7: is that the person behind the camera for me is
31:38
Speaker 7: my son and so and so. You know, your desiree
31:43
Speaker 7: is my reece, and getting to work with your son
31:47
Speaker 7: is just it's a gift, It's a blessing, right. And
31:51
Speaker 7: but what the intentionality has been. My father died when
31:54
Speaker 7: I was five years old, and so for me, part
31:59
Speaker 7: of my lego see designed. I didn't really know it
32:01
Speaker 7: at the time, but as when I had children was
32:05
Speaker 7: to do the things in life that I didn't get
32:08
Speaker 7: to do with my dad, to make sure my son
32:11
Speaker 7: had those things. And every day when I passed five
32:16
Speaker 7: years old with my son, every day after that was
32:20
Speaker 7: something I had never experienced, and so and so building
32:25
Speaker 7: that into him and giving my daughter those things, and
32:29
Speaker 7: my wife and I together determining that we value what
32:33
Speaker 7: we value together we wanted our children to value. And
32:37
Speaker 7: in terms of legacy, I'll tell you a little story.
32:39
Speaker 7: My son and daughter, my wife and I are Okay,
32:43
Speaker 7: we're sappy. We're just sappy. What it mean, I just
32:47
Speaker 7: say it. We are lovey dovey. You see us walking
32:50
Speaker 7: down the street. We're gonna hold hands I'm a hugger
32:53
Speaker 7: in public. I'm gonna say boo, I'm just that's how
32:57
Speaker 7: we are together because she's my best friend. And my
33:00
Speaker 7: son and daughter like to say that we have ruined
33:02
Speaker 7: them because now that's what they look for. So the
33:07
Speaker 7: legacy of our relationship is something they're looking for in
33:11
Speaker 7: a time period that may not value it the same way,
33:15
Speaker 7: but they know. But my daughter knows her value because
33:19
Speaker 7: of the way I treat her mother, and my son
33:22
Speaker 7: knows how to value because of the way I treat
33:25
Speaker 7: their mother. Those are the things we need to then
33:28
Speaker 7: we have an actual conversation about it, so we don't
33:31
Speaker 7: let it just be you see it. It's this is
33:34
Speaker 7: intentional son, this is how you are as a husband,
33:39
Speaker 7: as a father, as a community leader, or this is
33:42
Speaker 7: how you should be treated, or my or my wife
33:45
Speaker 7: is like, this is how you work together to build
33:47
Speaker 7: a life and leave it for the next generation. And
33:51
Speaker 7: for me it comes because it was a legacy of
33:55
Speaker 7: my grandparents and my family.
33:59
Speaker 6: That is there is powerful within itself because it goes
34:03
Speaker 6: back to the importance of you've talked about this. You
34:07
Speaker 6: kind of hint it to it when we were talking
34:08
Speaker 6: about the founder gravity and knowing the role in the
34:13
Speaker 6: your role.
34:13
Speaker 5: In the ecosystem.
34:16
Speaker 6: Something that you bring up in the Jackson episode is
34:21
Speaker 6: the different roles of like not only Joe Jackson, but
34:24
Speaker 6: Karen and Michael. And how when you misappropriate those roles
34:31
Speaker 6: or mismanage those roles, how it can leave a negative
34:37
Speaker 6: impact and leave loopholes in that ecosystem. How what are
34:43
Speaker 6: some more I guess you could speak about Karen the
34:46
Speaker 6: example of Karen's role in Michael's role, and how to
34:51
Speaker 6: healthily manage and appropriate those roles in the family ecosystem.
34:57
Speaker 7: Right, So when you look at every family has a system, right,
35:03
Speaker 7: and in the larger families it becomes more complicated, just
35:06
Speaker 7: like in a small family business. But there are people
35:09
Speaker 7: who are going to have certain skills. There are people
35:10
Speaker 7: who have certain gifts, and you want to look at those,
35:13
Speaker 7: even as a parent, and you identify those gifts and
35:16
Speaker 7: certain certain of your children will like numbers, and they're
35:19
Speaker 7: like math, and certain are going to be creative and
35:22
Speaker 7: they'll be a peacemaker. And it's largely biblical. I mean,
35:25
Speaker 7: you can you can find all these roles in the word, right.
35:28
Speaker 5: You can kind of tell them.
35:29
Speaker 7: You can talk about blessed is the peacemaker, and so
35:32
Speaker 7: someone in the family has to play that role. You
35:36
Speaker 7: have to have you know, you have to have an
35:38
Speaker 7: errand you have to have a communicator in the Bible, right,
35:42
Speaker 7: you have to have someone who's going to be able
35:44
Speaker 7: to put the words together because some leaders can't do it.
35:48
Speaker 7: And so you think about these roles in your family,
35:51
Speaker 7: and you think about the gifts that we've been given
35:54
Speaker 7: and how in a family do we help people? How
35:57
Speaker 7: do we help people with those roles? Right? I mean
36:00
Speaker 7: even like when you're building your community, you're talking about
36:03
Speaker 7: a safe space, right, But people can look to you
36:07
Speaker 7: as a teacher, as a coach, as a motivator. You
36:10
Speaker 7: have different roles, but your spirit allows you to do
36:13
Speaker 7: those things. And so we look at our family. I
36:16
Speaker 7: think we will benefit each other if we look at
36:18
Speaker 7: our family and our family businesses the same way that
36:23
Speaker 7: each of our each of the people here needs to
36:25
Speaker 7: has a talent, has a role, has an interest because
36:28
Speaker 7: if you talk to somebody, you'll also find out what
36:30
Speaker 7: they're interested in. Then you help that person develop so
36:34
Speaker 7: that they can carry forward the legacy that you're going
36:37
Speaker 7: to hand to them. And that legacy will grow beyond
36:40
Speaker 7: your wildness imagination. If you help prepare the people to carry.
36:44
Speaker 6: It goes back to what the whole preparing people to carry.
36:50
Speaker 6: When you said that, it just blew my mind and
36:54
Speaker 6: I thought, I'm glad you brought up this.
36:56
Speaker 5: It is in the Bible because the.
36:57
Speaker 6: Lord showed me David and Solomon and how David prepared
37:05
Speaker 6: the place. Solomon saw the preparation and understood the promise.
37:10
Speaker 6: And because Solomon understood it, when David passed, it wasn't
37:15
Speaker 6: a heavy load as heavy as a load because Solomon
37:18
Speaker 6: was already learning the structure. Now Solomon had a different
37:22
Speaker 6: way of doing things right, but it still was the
37:25
Speaker 6: foundation that God had already given David.
37:28
Speaker 5: So when when you when.
37:30
Speaker 6: You look at the temple, it was always I'm going
37:33
Speaker 6: to complete the temple that God assigned my father to do.
37:37
Speaker 5: And I think that when we when we look.
37:40
Speaker 6: At the biblical principles of legacy, we're missing points like
37:45
Speaker 6: that of the connection and that David, this is so good.
37:50
Speaker 6: David had Solomon around on. David had Solomon and proximity.
37:56
Speaker 6: Oh I feel my help coming.
37:57
Speaker 5: Here, you know, come on, come on. But David had.
38:06
Speaker 6: Solomon and proximity and proximity let Solomon see the promise
38:11
Speaker 6: before the promise was fulfilled. And I think that I
38:16
Speaker 6: want to know your thoughts on this, the connection between
38:20
Speaker 6: legacy and the lack of men, Like, are we losing
38:26
Speaker 6: legacy because we're not in the proximity of our men?
38:29
Speaker 6: Because if he is quote unquote the founder gravity, then
38:34
Speaker 6: what is what is bringing everything together?
38:37
Speaker 5: That's why that's my that's my vision of it. I
38:39
Speaker 5: would love to hear your thoughts on that particular thought.
38:43
Speaker 7: I'm gonna say yes, but I'm also going to say
38:45
Speaker 7: that one of the one of the episodes I did
38:50
Speaker 7: was do you have to have children to leave a legacy?
38:55
Speaker 7: And the answer is no, because some of the people
38:58
Speaker 7: who are most impactful in our lives lives are our coaches,
39:02
Speaker 7: our youth ministers, our people who are in the community
39:05
Speaker 7: who took care of us when we were young, and
39:08
Speaker 7: so yes, we need someone in our life to help
39:13
Speaker 7: pour into us, to help correct us, to help show
39:15
Speaker 7: us the way. Emerson said men are what their mothers
39:20
Speaker 7: make them, and I agree with that, but my pastor
39:25
Speaker 7: likes to say men are what they see in their
39:28
Speaker 7: fathers and what they watch, and especially among our boys.
39:34
Speaker 7: They watch intently. If you ever look at, even on
39:37
Speaker 7: a playground or in church or somewhere else, little boys,
39:40
Speaker 7: they are looking right, and they're often looking at their
39:44
Speaker 7: fathers or the men in the family, or different things.
39:47
Speaker 7: Look up from the game, they're going to be looking
39:48
Speaker 7: at at those people. And so yes, we need that
39:52
Speaker 7: proximity of men teaching and showing and being examples of
39:58
Speaker 7: what it means to be fathers and workers and leaders
40:03
Speaker 7: in our community. I wanted desperately to be fathers. But
40:08
Speaker 7: as I mentioned many of us, my father died when
40:12
Speaker 7: I was five years old, and so you would say
40:14
Speaker 7: I grew up without a father, But I had many fathers, right,
40:19
Speaker 7: And the Bible says the same thing. I had many
40:22
Speaker 7: fathers right. My grandfather right was there. He was seven
40:27
Speaker 7: years old when my dad died. And in church, my
40:29
Speaker 7: mother asked my uncles to pick me up because I
40:32
Speaker 7: fell asleep on the church pew. Because funerals can get
40:35
Speaker 7: long in the South, and so I fell asleep on
40:38
Speaker 7: the church pew, and my mom turned to my uncles
40:41
Speaker 7: and said, you know, could you pick him up? But
40:43
Speaker 7: my granddad, who was seventy years old, he said, I
40:46
Speaker 7: got him, and he picked me up and he never
40:49
Speaker 7: put me down again. And so we need people and
40:53
Speaker 7: there are other people who can do that. But yes,
40:55
Speaker 7: I think we need to encourage the men in our
40:59
Speaker 7: community to look beyond themselves and to find someone who
41:05
Speaker 7: they see who may not have that strong figure in
41:08
Speaker 7: their life and determine that's going to be part of
41:11
Speaker 7: my legacy. But that's part of what we're stepping into,
41:14
Speaker 7: right That's what some of us need to be released
41:16
Speaker 7: to step into our children at a stage where okay,
41:21
Speaker 7: I can release, now I can go do some of
41:22
Speaker 7: these other things. Or someone's retiring. I hate the word retirement,
41:26
Speaker 7: but someone is retiring and they now are released to
41:30
Speaker 7: do something, to step into something else.
41:35
Speaker 6: Garry, I feel like you're tugging on my spirit and
41:40
Speaker 6: my hirings and.
41:41
Speaker 5: All the time I feel so good. Right now, I
41:43
Speaker 5: feel so good. So I know you do this.
41:48
Speaker 6: You offer services for people that's, like I guess, concerned
41:53
Speaker 6: for their ecosystem and what legacy looks like for them.
41:56
Speaker 6: So if I'm coming to you, Gary, what does that
41:59
Speaker 6: process look like? How do you help me navigate navigate
42:02
Speaker 6: my legacy?
42:04
Speaker 7: Right? So, first, there's a couple of things you can
42:07
Speaker 7: do if it's really looking at your legacy. I have
42:11
Speaker 7: a tool I call a Legacy Deployment Reflection, and it
42:15
Speaker 7: allows you to assess where you are and you can
42:18
Speaker 7: in a few different areas of your life, and then
42:21
Speaker 7: it allows you to say, okay, well where do I
42:24
Speaker 7: need to go next? What is it I need to
42:26
Speaker 7: do to deploy my legacy the way I really want
42:30
Speaker 7: to deploy it. To design your legacy, not to allow
42:33
Speaker 7: it to be done by default. And so after you
42:36
Speaker 7: can do this reflection, I also have a tool called
42:38
Speaker 7: a founder gravity check, so if it's more specific to
42:40
Speaker 7: the business person who's been tied to that business for
42:44
Speaker 7: a long time, but it really starts with a conversation.
42:47
Speaker 7: Mat I think this kind of conversation we're having you
42:51
Speaker 7: open doors by your words. And so if you sit
42:54
Speaker 7: down and have a conversation to see if you're in
42:57
Speaker 7: that season of life, there's a particular game that you're
43:00
Speaker 7: in that you need to fill and then you can
43:02
Speaker 7: move forward. You know a lot of people who I
43:05
Speaker 7: talk to. Something I've come more recently to believe is
43:09
Speaker 7: that when we are six years old, most a lot
43:12
Speaker 7: of people get a t ball coach. And when we're
43:15
Speaker 7: about twelve years old, we got a basketball coach. And
43:18
Speaker 7: when we're twenty five years old, we have a coach.
43:20
Speaker 7: And when we're a young executive, we have a coach.
43:23
Speaker 7: When you start a podcast, you need a coach. When
43:27
Speaker 7: when when we when we when we're in our in
43:32
Speaker 7: our latter stages of our career, we have coaches, and
43:36
Speaker 7: any of us when we retire and walk out the
43:39
Speaker 7: door and we have thirty five years of life left,
43:42
Speaker 7: we don't have a coach. And that might be the
43:47
Speaker 7: most meaningful part of our life. When we have the
43:51
Speaker 7: opportunity to do what we're the purpose to do. You know,
43:56
Speaker 7: I've been doing a nine to five for a long time,
43:58
Speaker 7: but now God has got me wide open. I have time,
44:03
Speaker 7: Lord willing. I have put together some resources. I have networks,
44:08
Speaker 7: I have relationships. I have an influence and I'll have
44:13
Speaker 7: it for the next thirty years. But I don't know
44:16
Speaker 7: how to deploy it. And so we just get stuck.
44:24
Speaker 7: We get stuck after our success with deploying our purpose
44:29
Speaker 7: that God has purposed.
44:30
Speaker 2: Us to do.
44:33
Speaker 5: But not if we're going to see Geary hey.
44:40
Speaker 7: Here to help. We're here to help. That's what we
44:42
Speaker 7: want to do. We want to help people deploy their legacy,
44:45
Speaker 7: to break free, to release, to be effective, and to
44:48
Speaker 7: do those types of things that will just make a
44:50
Speaker 7: meaningful difference in their generational readiness.
44:54
Speaker 5: Man, I am so amazed by you, Geary.
44:56
Speaker 6: Like I I tell you, there's a lot and I
44:59
Speaker 6: just want to say it on my platform that I
45:01
Speaker 6: am so honored to know you.
45:03
Speaker 5: You you stretch me.
45:06
Speaker 6: You stretch me as a woman, but you really stretch
45:08
Speaker 6: me as a coach, because like you're the type of
45:11
Speaker 6: person that if I'm coaching you, I have to make
45:13
Speaker 6: sure not necessarily I know what I'm doing, but I
45:17
Speaker 6: gotta come with greatness because you deserve that. You you
45:21
Speaker 6: deserve nothing less than my excellence, because you're gonna execute
45:25
Speaker 6: on what I give you and just what you've been
45:28
Speaker 6: able to in knowing yourself. This is and this is
45:31
Speaker 6: just a TB for podcasters or if you're looking to
45:34
Speaker 6: start a podcast, knowing yourself helps you be a better podcaster.
45:38
Speaker 5: Right, And I might.
45:40
Speaker 6: Been doing this longer, but he immediately was able to
45:44
Speaker 6: get a concept of I already have the legacy concept.
45:47
Speaker 6: I'm already doing this, and I'm gonna maneuver that and
45:50
Speaker 6: make that language, Louder That's what podcasting does. He's making
45:55
Speaker 6: the message, his messaging of legacy. Louder Right, He's amplified
46:02
Speaker 6: his voice. And when I tell you, I'm not just
46:05
Speaker 6: proud for you, proud of you, I'm grateful for you
46:07
Speaker 6: because I am learning a lot from you, Like this
46:09
Speaker 6: is I just wonder I'm probably gonna binge watch you
46:12
Speaker 6: for a while because I am just absolutely stun like
46:18
Speaker 6: just amazed by you, Like you deserve to be listened to.
46:21
Speaker 6: You deserve to be experienced to people that experience. You
46:25
Speaker 6: have hit a gold mine, and I'm so glad I
46:28
Speaker 6: got to hit it. I'm so glad I got to.
46:31
Speaker 5: Hit There's a ray. There's a ray has been smiling
46:33
Speaker 5: this entire time. I just want straight away, she has
46:36
Speaker 5: been smiling this entire time. There's a ray. What you
46:38
Speaker 5: what you got over there?
46:39
Speaker 7: No?
46:39
Speaker 6: This has been great. This is one of those mindful conversations.
46:44
Speaker 6: Meaning like if some the the word legacy, right, I
46:50
Speaker 6: think we tend to know it to be one thing.
46:53
Speaker 6: It's hey, what what financial thing have you left your family?
46:57
Speaker 6: Have you or have not left the family?
46:59
Speaker 5: Right?
46:59
Speaker 6: But but what I'm hearing in this conversation is legacy
47:04
Speaker 6: is bigger than that, right, And so with it being
47:07
Speaker 6: a mindful conversation, It's in how you show up. It's
47:10
Speaker 6: in how you decide to parent, It's in how you
47:13
Speaker 6: decide to be a friend, a neighbor, a business person.
47:15
Speaker 6: It's how you choose to operate the purpose that God
47:20
Speaker 6: has given you on this earth. Right, I was sitting
47:22
Speaker 6: here and I was thinking through this conversation. As I
47:25
Speaker 6: was listening to you guys, Bishop Turner came to mind.
47:28
Speaker 6: Bishop Turner was our choir director at UAB, the University
47:33
Speaker 6: of Alabama, Birmingham. He directed the gospel choir for over
47:37
Speaker 6: twenty five something years, right, and I had the opportunity
47:39
Speaker 6: to experience him for about three of those, about three
47:43
Speaker 6: years while I was in college. And when I tell you,
47:45
Speaker 6: I looked forward to Monday nights because for some college
47:49
Speaker 6: kids who may not have been in church, or they
47:51
Speaker 6: may have been off from from their hometown. To me,
47:55
Speaker 6: that was my I'm gonna say my sanctuary, right, Holse
47:59
Speaker 6: Hall was the moment that the opportunity I got every
48:02
Speaker 6: Monday night to experience not only God, but the experience
48:06
Speaker 6: a great legacy.
48:07
Speaker 5: Right, bish Real Turner was so brilliant when it came
48:11
Speaker 5: to music.
48:12
Speaker 6: He was so brilliant when it came to composing, and
48:15
Speaker 6: he has given a space and a place for many
48:18
Speaker 6: different artists. That's actually how I met Coach j d
48:21
Speaker 6: is due to ua Be Gospel Choir. He's given so
48:23
Speaker 6: many people an opportunity to to just be who God
48:27
Speaker 6: has called him to be. And so he passed away
48:29
Speaker 6: a few years ago during during COVID, and I remember
48:32
Speaker 6: at the time I couldn't go to the service I
48:34
Speaker 6: was I had just had surgery, and so I watched
48:36
Speaker 6: it online and I remember seeing how full of the
48:39
Speaker 6: church was, and I remember seeing how many people were
48:41
Speaker 6: actually watching it live online, and for some reason, I
48:44
Speaker 6: just thought, I was like, Wow, this is what legacy
48:47
Speaker 6: looks like. The lives, the many lives that he has
48:51
Speaker 6: touched just by being obedient and showing up and who
48:53
Speaker 6: God had already called him to be, you know, doing
48:55
Speaker 6: the thing that God had called him to do.
48:57
Speaker 5: And so I just thought about that, and so for me.
49:00
Speaker 6: It's it's a it's an opportunity to just evaluate how
49:04
Speaker 6: I've been showing up right, evaluate the thing that I
49:08
Speaker 6: know God has common to do. Am I doing it
49:10
Speaker 6: to the best of my ability, or am I kind
49:13
Speaker 6: of you know, half telling it right?
49:15
Speaker 5: Because legacy is it can be good.
49:16
Speaker 6: It could be it could be a good thing, a
49:18
Speaker 6: positive thing, or it could be a negative thing. If
49:20
Speaker 6: we think about like you talked about family, like some
49:23
Speaker 6: of the the old that's just how big Mama did it,
49:26
Speaker 6: or this is just how we how we do the
49:28
Speaker 6: thing that don't make it right, but that's the legacy
49:30
Speaker 6: that has been left on that family thing. So I
49:32
Speaker 6: just appreciate this, this mindful conversation about legacy because I
49:36
Speaker 6: think if we all just take a genuine self evaluation,
49:43
Speaker 6: I think that we can really take this word and
49:47
Speaker 6: how we decide to show up in the world and
49:49
Speaker 6: what we decide.
49:50
Speaker 5: To leave at heart.
49:52
Speaker 6: So thank you, mister Francis, for your for your for
49:55
Speaker 6: your learn I can think.
50:00
Speaker 7: And thank you for sharing the legacy of Bishop Turner.
50:03
Speaker 7: Yes that way, as my mom said, I don't want
50:07
Speaker 7: to be forgotten. He'll live on through the people he
50:11
Speaker 7: poured into because you are willing to speak that word.
50:14
Speaker 5: Yeah, yes, most definitely.
50:16
Speaker 6: This has been a very refreshing conversation.
50:21
Speaker 5: Gary. I'm so glad I invited you.
50:24
Speaker 6: I was like, I try not to show favorite. So
50:34
Speaker 6: I asked, I really ask God, Okay, why am I
50:39
Speaker 6: asking this person? And I think when we're in the
50:43
Speaker 6: season of Builder Bill, that's our mantra for the year, right,
50:46
Speaker 6: Builder Bill, That's what the Lord gave us, and we're
50:48
Speaker 6: talking about Builder Builder Bill. I think it has to
50:52
Speaker 6: go back to it. How you open up your podcast
50:56
Speaker 6: is what you build is not a legacy when people
50:59
Speaker 6: aren't prepared to period. And so Builder Build is not
51:03
Speaker 6: just a mantra to to just go out and build,
51:09
Speaker 6: but building intentionally so we can take what needs the
51:13
Speaker 6: preparation of the thing to connect it to our legacy.
51:16
Speaker 6: The scripture that's coming to mind is about the vision,
51:21
Speaker 6: making it plain so that they can run with it.
51:23
Speaker 5: And they can run with it.
51:25
Speaker 6: It is the preparation to legacy. And so I'm so
51:28
Speaker 6: grateful that you are doing this. I'm so honored that
51:32
Speaker 6: you would come on the platform and share your intelligence here.
51:35
Speaker 6: So as a tradition, just as the podcast, I give
51:40
Speaker 6: my guests the last the last say, and so I
51:44
Speaker 6: know we've talked about several things throughout legacy, but I
51:48
Speaker 6: also want to didn't know if you came in something
51:50
Speaker 6: here with something on your heart and so the floor
51:52
Speaker 6: is yours to leave.
51:54
Speaker 5: Leave your final thoughts with our audience.
51:58
Speaker 7: I want your audience to know that life would be
52:04
Speaker 7: much simpler if you just start with one conversation with
52:11
Speaker 7: your parent or your grandparent or your grandchild that you're
52:16
Speaker 7: unaccustomed to having.
52:20
Speaker 5: MM I love it. I love it.
52:22
Speaker 1: He did.
52:22
Speaker 5: He did it all in one take, baby, all of
52:24
Speaker 5: what take. I love it.
52:26
Speaker 6: So so if you I want, I need you guys
52:29
Speaker 6: to follow Geary.
52:30
Speaker 5: I normally I normally don't.
52:32
Speaker 6: Do his call out, but I really need you guys
52:33
Speaker 6: to follow Gary follow the Inheritance of Income podcast. We
52:38
Speaker 6: were gonna collabse We're gonna collapse with him on this,
52:40
Speaker 6: so you can just go through the collaboration. He's also
52:43
Speaker 6: on social media. He's posted every week is it Wednesdays?
52:47
Speaker 1: Gary?
52:47
Speaker 6: That you post Wednesdays Wednesdays so you'll have a new
52:52
Speaker 6: episode with get from Gary every single Wednesday. We fully
52:57
Speaker 6: support Gerek and his messaging here just as the podcast.
53:00
Speaker 6: And so Derek, thank you so much. Doesn't wad love
53:04
Speaker 6: you love your girl. We love you guys until next week.
53:07
Speaker 6: Until next time, Remember, life could be much more simple
53:11
Speaker 6: if you just asked.
53:17
Speaker 2: Thank you for tuning in to this week's episode.
53:20
Speaker 3: Since you've made it this far, you might as well
53:23
Speaker 3: connect with us on all social media.
53:24
Speaker 2: Platforms at the Jessica S. Smith.
53:28
Speaker 3: I know I won't see you back until next week,
53:30
Speaker 3: but until then, remember to love always yourself and always
53:37
Speaker 3: thank thank God for.
53:38
Speaker 2: One another day.
53:40
Speaker 4: Hey, hey, I know we could be another way. Hey,
53:47
Speaker 4: pray thank God for another day. Hey hey, I'm just
53:53
Speaker 4: thankful for another day. Hey hey, another day, another day wise,
54:01
Speaker 4: another day to get it right, another day that rise up,
54:04
Speaker 4: another day living, another day we loved ones. I always
54:07
Speaker 4: remember hold it down for a ball one ye