Latest / You Minding Your Own Business / Episode 40 - Walking To The Beat of Your Own Drum, Path, and Purpose.

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Episode 40 - Walking To The Beat of Your Own Drum, Path, and Purpose. · You Minding Your Own Business

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Speaker 1: Hello, Hello, Hello Ebody. Welcome to You Minding your Own
0:04
Speaker 1: Business radio podcasts. I'm your host gott Is Ausha Mary.
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Speaker 1: I'm gonna thank you guys for joining me for this episode.
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Speaker 1: If you guys let the commentary. You wanna hear more,
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Speaker 1: please go to speaker dot com for slash you Minding
0:17
Speaker 1: your Own Business. If you wanna sear all ten of
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Speaker 1: my podcasts that I do based on healing, recovery and addiction,
0:23
Speaker 1: you can go to speaker dot com for slash. My
0:25
Speaker 1: name A sah m A R. I am A. You
0:29
Speaker 1: can also hear on iHeartRadio, Amazon, Google, Spotify, iTunes, and
0:35
Speaker 1: multiple other streaming companies. A little bit about me, I
0:38
Speaker 1: am a certified recovery healing recovery coaches all about having
0:41
Speaker 1: people in their pasts and their journeys to a new
0:43
Speaker 1: and better you through self discovery. I help people mentally, psychologically, emotionally, spiritually, financially,
0:51
Speaker 1: internally and externally. And your relationships where it's your family,
0:56
Speaker 1: your friends, your siblings, your romantic relationships, anybody you don't know,
1:01
Speaker 1: anybody that's impacting or affecting your life in a negative way.
1:07
Speaker 1: And if you want to be a guest on my podcast,
1:10
Speaker 1: or you want to have one on one coaching, or
1:13
Speaker 1: if you have a particular topic you want to talk about,
1:16
Speaker 1: or if you want me to basically just give you
1:21
Speaker 1: some just inspiration or topic that you guys want me
1:25
Speaker 1: to talk about when it comes to minding your own business,
1:28
Speaker 1: please email me at A s H A dot M
1:30
Speaker 1: A r I A M A. It's a s H
1:33
Speaker 1: A dot M A R I A M A zero
1:37
Speaker 1: one at gmail dot com. Now today's topic is you
1:42
Speaker 1: minding your own business when it comes to coming into
1:49
Speaker 1: your own walk into the beat of your own DRUMA.
1:52
Speaker 1: I should say, there come a time where we walk
1:55
Speaker 1: the beats of other people's drums, but we don't walk
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Speaker 1: in the beats of our own drums. And one day
2:01
Speaker 1: we wake up and we realize that we need to
2:04
Speaker 1: walk to the beat of our own drums. I just
2:07
Speaker 1: had a conversation with Miss Stacy Nile and I have
2:11
Speaker 1: podcasts that we will be doing on Friday, and this
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Speaker 1: podcast is going to be very very very good, not
2:19
Speaker 1: only for myself, but also for those of you that
2:22
Speaker 1: are coaches, those of you that are going through healing,
2:26
Speaker 1: recovery and addictions. We will be talking about how when
2:32
Speaker 1: it comes to healing and recovery. There are so many
2:36
Speaker 1: different techniques you can use that will help people in
2:40
Speaker 1: different aspects. How as a coach, you have to look
2:45
Speaker 1: at each person individually and not as a group, because
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Speaker 1: the one thing about being a coach, everybody is different.
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Speaker 1: Nobody's the same, everybody does things differently. Everybody's journeys are
3:01
Speaker 1: gonna be different. So even though people are going through
3:04
Speaker 1: the same thing, they might be going through it in
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Speaker 1: a different way. They might be elevating different, evolving different,
3:12
Speaker 1: growing different. It could be medical things that standing in
3:17
Speaker 1: their way of their growth, and their fears and their insecurities.
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Speaker 1: It could be everything from spiritually, emotionally, psychologically. It can
3:28
Speaker 1: be people. She did this thing with me that we're
3:33
Speaker 1: gonna talk about on the podcast where she told me
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Speaker 1: to close my eyes think about the one word as
3:42
Speaker 1: far as feeling wise where I'm at, and I said
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Speaker 1: the words stuck. And I said the word stuck because
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Speaker 1: I am technically stuck right now. And the reason why
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Speaker 1: I'm stuck is because of the word rejection. Rejection is
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Speaker 1: a very big thing for me, and one thing that's
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Speaker 1: a very big issue that I am trying so hard
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Speaker 1: to overcome. I am trying to get through learning how
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Speaker 1: when somebody says no, to accept it instead of trying
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Speaker 1: to convince people to say yes, just accept it and
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Speaker 1: move forward. Those people are not meant for me, because
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Speaker 1: if I work hard and I'm dedicated, those same people
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Speaker 1: that said no will be the same people that will
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Speaker 1: be coming back to me wanting to work with me,
4:33
Speaker 1: or wanting to hire me, or wanting to give me
4:36
Speaker 1: a job, or wanted me to do those podcasts. The
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Speaker 1: ones that turned me down and told me no, they
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Speaker 1: didn't want to do an interview with me. Now I
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Speaker 1: want to do an interview with me after, you know,
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Speaker 1: seeing what I do. So when she told me to
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Speaker 1: close my minds, she said, think back to a moment either.
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Speaker 1: First of all, the first time I was rejected, and
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Speaker 1: that's when I was a kid, and it came down
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Speaker 1: to my parents. They were the first one that ever
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Speaker 1: rejected me. So I thought about the moment where my
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Speaker 1: father rejected me about something, my mother rejected me about something.
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Speaker 1: And then she told me think about the day that
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Speaker 1: you were born, so I could picture in my mind
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Speaker 1: my parents, my mother given birth to me and Kentucky.
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Speaker 1: So I ended up thinking about that for a second,
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Speaker 1: and then she said, I want you to think back
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Speaker 1: from the moment right there to the moment that you rejected,
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Speaker 1: all the way till now, when I tell you, I
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Speaker 1: saw every single person, every single time I was rejected,
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Speaker 1: and I was in shock when I woke up. And
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Speaker 1: I'm still coming to terms with it, mind you, even
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Speaker 1: though it's been about two hours since we did that,
5:56
Speaker 1: about the hours since we did that conversation, and I'm
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Speaker 1: still pondering on it because cause I can't believe how
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Speaker 1: many times I've been rejected and how many ways I've
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Speaker 1: been rejected. But I realized now that those rejections should
6:14
Speaker 1: have been left where they were. I shouldn't have tried
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Speaker 1: to convince people even after they said no, to try
6:22
Speaker 1: to build anything with these people. But ironically, before that,
6:28
Speaker 1: I was getting ready to get up to do the
6:31
Speaker 1: conversation and my legs started hurting really really bad. And
6:35
Speaker 1: I didn't know why, but I started feeling bad to
6:39
Speaker 1: the point where I almost thought I was gonna have
6:40
Speaker 1: to call nine one one. But when she did that
6:43
Speaker 1: with me, it actually made me feel better. Honestly, it
6:47
Speaker 1: helped me in more ways than when I was very
6:51
Speaker 1: appreciative of it. It was really helpful because it made
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Speaker 1: me realize that at the end of the day, that
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Speaker 1: I am an individual. And when we were talking about
7:04
Speaker 1: she thought I had been doing coaching for years, that's
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Speaker 1: what I just started. And I told her how I've
7:08
Speaker 1: been trying to figure out how to do my courses,
7:11
Speaker 1: how to do my webinars and seminars and getting into
7:15
Speaker 1: those things doing motivational speaking, and she says she wants
7:17
Speaker 1: to help me with that because I told her Ius
7:20
Speaker 1: that the biggest issue I've been having is all these
7:23
Speaker 1: people that claim they can help me as far as
7:25
Speaker 1: coaching and as far as trying to learn how to
7:29
Speaker 1: put this stuff together, is not really teaching me. It's
7:33
Speaker 1: more so about the money. So the one thing I
7:37
Speaker 1: told her I wanted to do differently was I wanna
7:39
Speaker 1: be able to teach these classes, meaning once a week
7:42
Speaker 1: I get with the people that are doing the courses
7:45
Speaker 1: and I actually do these courses, and depending on where
7:48
Speaker 1: they are and what level they are determines you know.
7:53
Speaker 1: Was what? Now, The good thing about it is the
7:56
Speaker 1: people that buy the course, the people that take the course.
7:59
Speaker 1: Can I always come in any time after they've taken it,
8:03
Speaker 1: come in and do a refresher so they don't have
8:06
Speaker 1: to pay to do the refresher course if they need it,
8:10
Speaker 1: so they'll still do the one on one coaching. Because
8:13
Speaker 1: see ones they take the course, then there's a level two,
8:18
Speaker 1: and then a level three and then a level four,
8:20
Speaker 1: So there's twelve levels to that one course. There's not
8:25
Speaker 1: just one level to it. There's multiple levels to it,
8:29
Speaker 1: but each level will be different in some way. So
8:34
Speaker 1: in the beginning, when you take the course, you're gonna
8:37
Speaker 1: have this thing where you're gonna have to say, past,
8:42
Speaker 1: present and future. What is the past you? Look, what
8:47
Speaker 1: if I was to have met the past version of you?
8:50
Speaker 1: What would they have looked like? Who would you have been?
8:53
Speaker 1: Far as past? President is who you are currently? And
8:57
Speaker 1: the future is who are you trying to become? The
9:00
Speaker 1: middle version of you when you get into this course
9:03
Speaker 1: is going to be who you are now and who
9:06
Speaker 1: do you want to be and what do you want
9:08
Speaker 1: to leave behind from the past to become that new
9:12
Speaker 1: version of you. Then when you get to the last
9:15
Speaker 1: part of it, it's gonna be who do you want
9:18
Speaker 1: to be? And who you are? Who do you want
9:24
Speaker 1: to be and what do you want to bring with
9:27
Speaker 1: you from the presence and the past to make you better.
9:31
Speaker 1: So the goal is to become this new version of yourself,
9:37
Speaker 1: not based on everybody else, but based on you, based
9:41
Speaker 1: on what you put down. So everything that you say
9:46
Speaker 1: that you want to become, there are goals attached to it.
9:50
Speaker 1: So each person may have their own separate goals, but
9:54
Speaker 1: the way to go about it may be different. So
9:58
Speaker 1: you may watch, you may have four sign five assignments
10:02
Speaker 1: that you do, and we go over each assignment every
10:06
Speaker 1: single week for ten to twelve weeks, and then you
10:11
Speaker 1: may move on to the next step. And when you
10:15
Speaker 1: move on to the next step, it's gonna be a
10:17
Speaker 1: little bit more challenging because as you progress, you don't realize,
10:23
Speaker 1: oh my god, I'm doing the same thing, but now
10:25
Speaker 1: I'm looking at it differently. Well, that's just the first
10:27
Speaker 1: step of it all, learning how to realize that you
10:32
Speaker 1: are doing things differently. You ain't gonna notice it at first.
10:36
Speaker 1: You're not even gonna realize that the course is the same.
10:39
Speaker 1: It's just gonna be worded differently. So the way that
10:44
Speaker 1: it's worded when you first started will not be the
10:46
Speaker 1: way it's worded in the middle, and in even in
10:49
Speaker 1: the end. So when you get finished, you can be like,
10:52
Speaker 1: wait a minute, I just did the same thing, and
10:54
Speaker 1: yet I did it all these different ways exactly. That
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Speaker 1: is the whole point. So you have many different ways
11:02
Speaker 1: to do one thing. You just got to decide what
11:05
Speaker 1: it is that works with you, works for you, and
11:07
Speaker 1: how do you want to go about doing it. That
11:10
Speaker 1: is the first step. So when you start figuring this out,
11:14
Speaker 1: and it can change at any time, so you might
11:18
Speaker 1: get to the end of it and then you might say,
11:20
Speaker 1: you know what, maybe I'll subtract this, maybe I'll add this,
11:24
Speaker 1: and trust me, it is fine if you do that.
11:29
Speaker 1: It's absolutely okay, as you should. So I want people
11:34
Speaker 1: to understand that it is quite okay to change your perspective.
11:38
Speaker 1: It's okay for you to do something different. So as
11:41
Speaker 1: you go through the journey, you'll be eliminating the things
11:44
Speaker 1: that don't work for you and keeping the things that do.
11:48
Speaker 1: And as you as you progress, you will be getting
11:51
Speaker 1: rid of things every day, and that's okay, as you should.
11:55
Speaker 1: But in order to be the best version of yourself,
11:58
Speaker 1: you're gonna constantly get rid. You're gonna constantly delete things
12:02
Speaker 1: that don't serve you, that don't help you mentally, psychologically,
12:05
Speaker 1: emotionally experienced me, none of the goals that you're doing
12:08
Speaker 1: to me. Give an example, went to the doctor yesterday.
12:11
Speaker 1: Two doctor's appointments, one for my eyes and one for
12:15
Speaker 1: my eyes, I mean one for our doctor's appointment. I'm sorry,
12:17
Speaker 1: regular doctor's appointment. So when I went to my eye appointment,
12:21
Speaker 1: I let him know my issues with my driving and
12:24
Speaker 1: he said, you're not getting enough. I told him about
12:25
Speaker 1: my sleep issues. He also told me my glasses did
12:29
Speaker 1: not have progression. I don't know why they didn't have progressives.
12:33
Speaker 1: They should have been progressive and they weren't. And that's
12:35
Speaker 1: like a fifth or six times since twenty seventeen where
12:39
Speaker 1: I've had these issues with my glasses not having progressive
12:42
Speaker 1: and I paid for it, paid for it, and they
12:45
Speaker 1: weren't there. So now they said they're gonna make sure
12:50
Speaker 1: that my glasses have progressive and make sure they're done correctly.
12:54
Speaker 1: So they're gonna make sure that they have progressive and
12:57
Speaker 1: make sure I can see them, and then if knock,
12:59
Speaker 1: they'll center back to their correct I also have these
13:02
Speaker 1: glasses that I put on that ill help that when
13:05
Speaker 1: I'm not, you know, doing anything. I can just put
13:08
Speaker 1: these on and a help with your vision. And I'm
13:09
Speaker 1: about to use them every day for about an hour
13:13
Speaker 1: two hours. Just put them on and just listen versus
13:17
Speaker 1: just watching. I have my eye thing that goes around
13:19
Speaker 1: my eyes. It helps beside my eyes. I got some
13:22
Speaker 1: stuff that's gonna go under my eyes to help with that.
13:24
Speaker 1: I have raccoonized. If y'all don't know, I have raccoonized,
13:28
Speaker 1: so they'll help with that. So he gave me my
13:31
Speaker 1: new prescription that will help with driving reading and I'll
13:34
Speaker 1: be able to read things without taking my glasses off.
13:38
Speaker 1: Cause every time I turn around, I have to take
13:40
Speaker 1: my glass off just to be able to read something.
13:42
Speaker 1: So now I won't have to do that. But we'll
13:43
Speaker 1: see when I get them back. My doctor's appointment, we
13:49
Speaker 1: talked about my hip area, my pelvit area. It is
13:55
Speaker 1: infected and I have authorritis in my pelvit and so
14:00
Speaker 1: we have to do some hip exercises and we're gonna
14:02
Speaker 1: try some cream to help with the infection. And but
14:06
Speaker 1: I the the cream is like fifty one dollars, So
14:10
Speaker 1: I wait till I go back to work before I
14:11
Speaker 1: get that cream because it's too expensive. And my doctor
14:15
Speaker 1: just is about to have a baby. Is she gonna
14:16
Speaker 1: be going to January? So I may have to call
14:18
Speaker 1: tomorrow to see if I can get another cream that's
14:21
Speaker 1: gonna be a little bit cheaper than the one she got.
14:23
Speaker 1: But if not, I have to just buy it and
14:25
Speaker 1: get it and du'ss it on that. I have an
14:28
Speaker 1: interview tomorrow. I have uh hopefully knock on Wood will
14:35
Speaker 1: give me a reglar job until I built my coaching
14:38
Speaker 1: business and my you know motivation speaking and writing the
14:41
Speaker 1: book and things like that. So we talked about we
14:47
Speaker 1: talked about the colonostrophe. So they can go in and
14:51
Speaker 1: they can pull the pollop. Now, mind you, they may
14:54
Speaker 1: go in and remove their assist on my in my abdomen.
14:58
Speaker 1: So I haven't talked to my doctor yet, the one
15:00
Speaker 1: that's gonna do it. I have to, you know, schedule
15:02
Speaker 1: appointment with her and see does she want me to
15:05
Speaker 1: come in or does she want me to do it
15:08
Speaker 1: via zoom and we can talk about what need to
15:10
Speaker 1: be done. But I may have to go in person
15:12
Speaker 1: because I have to give her the referral to do
15:15
Speaker 1: the colonostrophy and which the terms will be when we
15:19
Speaker 1: have to do the surgery because it's time for me
15:20
Speaker 1: to get another colonostrophe, so hopefully they'll pay for it. Also,
15:30
Speaker 1: we talked about getting some blood work done, make sure
15:32
Speaker 1: all my blood work is good. She said, my co
15:35
Speaker 1: my cholesterol was high last time she saw me, so
15:38
Speaker 1: we have to work on that. But I did, but
15:41
Speaker 1: I did lose six pounds, so now I'm down to
15:44
Speaker 1: two oh one. So I'm eleven pounds to my goal
15:48
Speaker 1: and I plan to get there. So after having these
15:52
Speaker 1: conversations with these doctors, I was sitting down and I said, well,
15:56
Speaker 1: exercise gonna be one, sleep gonna be one. But since
16:00
Speaker 1: I lost my job three weeks ago, almost a month ago,
16:04
Speaker 1: I my sleep has been kind of off kilter. So
16:08
Speaker 1: now I said, you know what, I'm gonna go to
16:09
Speaker 1: bed early and get some rest early. So I might
16:14
Speaker 1: make some nuggets or I might, you know, order something
16:17
Speaker 1: and eat something. But I'm trying to stop ordering food.
16:22
Speaker 1: So I took some Hambury meat out, so I gotta
16:26
Speaker 1: see what's in there that I can fix. It's gonna
16:28
Speaker 1: be quick and fast. So I had some macaroni and cheese,
16:31
Speaker 1: some baked chicken. So that's what I had today, and
16:35
Speaker 1: I'm gonna eat because I'm not gonna eat anything else
16:39
Speaker 1: after I do this podcast. So I'm gonna go ahead
16:41
Speaker 1: and order something, and then around eight o'clock I'll stop eating.
16:45
Speaker 1: I eat twice a day, twice maybe once a day.
16:49
Speaker 1: But what I also learned when it comes to that
16:53
Speaker 1: is that if you fast for two or three days
16:57
Speaker 1: and then you get back to eating a lot of
16:59
Speaker 1: y'all overeat because you haven't eaten in two or three
17:02
Speaker 1: days and your body is starting. And somebody else watching says,
17:07
Speaker 1: if you just do a intimate sixteen twelve hours. So
17:12
Speaker 1: when like say, for example, if I eat at eight,
17:15
Speaker 1: I will not eat it. Well if I eat like
17:17
Speaker 1: after I do this podcast, if I don't eat anything
17:21
Speaker 1: like after seven thirty. So if I order something after
17:24
Speaker 1: I get done doing this podcast and seven thirty, I
17:27
Speaker 1: stop eating. Or if I make something, if I got
17:30
Speaker 1: cause I got some Tato tots, I can make some
17:32
Speaker 1: Tata tots and some nuggets and eat that and be good.
17:38
Speaker 1: So I could do that or buy one, get one
17:40
Speaker 1: free and have something for tomorrow. Also, I said I'm
17:44
Speaker 1: gonna start making chia seeds for breakfast, putting some oats
17:48
Speaker 1: in there, some syrup and maybe some fruit or either
17:53
Speaker 1: some of the like at tiva and yogurt, putting it
17:56
Speaker 1: in there and stirring it. Now you're probably wondering where
17:59
Speaker 1: I'm going with this. Well, now that I know what
18:05
Speaker 1: the issues are, now I know how to focus on them,
18:08
Speaker 1: like for example, kidney tea, drinking, nap, exercise, dieting. Well,
18:14
Speaker 1: I don't like to work dining, but lifestyle. What is
18:18
Speaker 1: my new lifestyle gonna look like? As far as working
18:22
Speaker 1: on my authritis, working on his courses, working on all
18:26
Speaker 1: these different things, and that is sitting down and writing
18:28
Speaker 1: a schedule. So the first thing I'm trying to do
18:32
Speaker 1: between now and Monday, now and Sunday, it's working on sleep.
18:36
Speaker 1: So tonight I'm gonna get in bed, go to sleep,
18:40
Speaker 1: get some rest. I wait for my new glasses, and
18:45
Speaker 1: then try to get my tires and stuff done, and
18:49
Speaker 1: then wash clothes, get that done. And then after I
18:54
Speaker 1: do that, I'm going to have an interview tomorrow. Wash
18:58
Speaker 1: clothes and then go from there. Figure out. I took
19:04
Speaker 1: some hamburger meat out, so I took some turkey meat
19:07
Speaker 1: or chicken meat, and I'm gonna mix it with some
19:12
Speaker 1: I'm gonna mix it with some uh rice and some seasoning,
19:19
Speaker 1: and I might make it like a stir fry. So
19:23
Speaker 1: I'm gonna put in the pan and I'm going to
19:25
Speaker 1: cook the rice and fry it, and then I'm going
19:29
Speaker 1: to put it in some water with some vegetables like
19:32
Speaker 1: some broccoli and made like a stir fry and eat it.
19:37
Speaker 1: And I might add some you know, like gravy or
19:40
Speaker 1: something on it to give it some seasoning, and that'd
19:43
Speaker 1: be about it, and it'll be all in one dish.
19:45
Speaker 1: So I'm getting more so into all in one dishes.
19:48
Speaker 1: I also have some uzzo as well, where I can
19:51
Speaker 1: do that too. With the uzzo, could get in there
19:54
Speaker 1: and put some different vegetables and stuff in there, peppers,
19:58
Speaker 1: tomatoes that I cut up, put them in there. I
20:02
Speaker 1: also get some cucumbers in there, gotting cut up. So again,
20:07
Speaker 1: you know, what works for me is something that works
20:11
Speaker 1: for me. But that doesn't mean I won't give the
20:13
Speaker 1: tips for it. But if somebody said they lots of ons,
20:17
Speaker 1: those those t last toasts and tolerant, then I have
20:20
Speaker 1: to go about it different. If somebody is someone that
20:23
Speaker 1: only eats meat, then I have to go about it differently,
20:26
Speaker 1: So depending on who my client is determines how I
20:29
Speaker 1: go about doing it. But it's based on them, not
20:32
Speaker 1: based on meat, because the way I do things maybe different.
20:36
Speaker 1: Nothing is cutting down on social media. I have recipes
20:40
Speaker 1: that I have enough recipes that last me but a year,
20:43
Speaker 1: and all these recipes I'm gonna try. Some of them
20:46
Speaker 1: are the same, some of them are different, but we're
20:49
Speaker 1: gonna try them all to see how they work. Also
20:53
Speaker 1: trying to get into skincare, creating skincare hair care. Since
20:58
Speaker 1: you know I'm working on my hair could have hair loss,
21:02
Speaker 1: I figured that I would start doing skin care. So
21:06
Speaker 1: I'm just going to write down the things that i
21:09
Speaker 1: want to do. And the first thing is the podcast interviews, conversation,
21:15
Speaker 1: well I call them conversations. So I'm minding my own business.
21:18
Speaker 1: I'm not worried about what everybody else is doing. Like
21:21
Speaker 1: Carter B's album comes out Friday, ILL do a listening
21:24
Speaker 1: party on my twick TikTok. Who knows, TikTok may not
21:28
Speaker 1: be here after tomorrow, so who knows, But whatever happens,
21:36
Speaker 1: it happens. So again, like I said, you know, I
21:40
Speaker 1: have another conversation with Nai and her she lost her
21:44
Speaker 1: son due to a police balance pspitality. Don't have that conversation.
21:50
Speaker 1: So in the end, like I said, you know, you
21:55
Speaker 1: minding your own businesses. You're focused on you. Whatever you're
22:00
Speaker 1: watching or things that's gonna help you, not things that
22:03
Speaker 1: are gonna hinder you. Now, when it comes to healing
22:07
Speaker 1: and recovery, it's about remaining and keeping that healing and recovery,
22:10
Speaker 1: and nobody else can do that for you. You have
22:13
Speaker 1: to do it for yourself. If you can't do it
22:15
Speaker 1: for yourself, then we have a very sense problem here.
22:17
Speaker 1: If you're someone that based your life on other people,
22:19
Speaker 1: then you're not gonna be able to heal and recover
22:23
Speaker 1: because as soon as other people come in your life,
22:25
Speaker 1: you want me wrap back where you started. So you
22:28
Speaker 1: have to understand that people and emotions are either gonna
22:33
Speaker 1: be the addition or subtraction to you. So you're gonna
22:39
Speaker 1: be removing things daily. July, when you go in your
22:43
Speaker 1: kitchen and you be like, I don't like this, so
22:46
Speaker 1: you decide to rearrange your kitchen. You may go in
22:50
Speaker 1: your bedroom and say, you know what, let me take
22:52
Speaker 1: these sheets of i'm'a do something a little bit different,
22:54
Speaker 1: and that's what you decide to do. So I do
22:55
Speaker 1: something different, and it's okay if you do not along
22:59
Speaker 1: with that, you should be able to do things the
23:02
Speaker 1: way you wanna do it. And somebody come to your
23:05
Speaker 1: house and they nick picking they not living there, You
23:07
Speaker 1: living there. A lot of y'all have these cookouts for
23:11
Speaker 1: everybody else, and yet instilled, you're sitting up here the
23:16
Speaker 1: one paying for everything. They don't bring gift, they don't
23:19
Speaker 1: bring gifts, they don't bring nothing, and you're the one
23:22
Speaker 1: that's providing everything. People that have these weddings, you're having
23:25
Speaker 1: these weddings to what, throwing somebody face that you're getting married,
23:28
Speaker 1: that you got married, trying throwing in your front your
23:31
Speaker 1: friends' faces that you're the one that got married, and
23:33
Speaker 1: they still sing. I mean, you have to ask yourself
23:37
Speaker 1: while you're doing certain things. So if you got people
23:40
Speaker 1: that they get engaged and then get married immediately, and
23:44
Speaker 1: y'all be like, hi in the world, y'all gonna just
23:46
Speaker 1: get engaged and get married immediately, cause they're not waiting.
23:49
Speaker 1: This is something that's already been playing already in the works.
23:52
Speaker 1: She just don't know when, so he knows that they've
23:55
Speaker 1: already sat down talked about finances. They've already talked about
23:59
Speaker 1: a house. They've already they've they've built up enough separately
24:04
Speaker 1: to come together and put their resource together to not
24:07
Speaker 1: only buy a house, but it still have money left
24:10
Speaker 1: over to do what the other one wants to do,
24:12
Speaker 1: and then still preparing for kids, so they have when
24:16
Speaker 1: they get married. They may wait a good four or
24:19
Speaker 1: five years for they have kids, because they want to
24:21
Speaker 1: make sure they're financial stable to at least have their
24:23
Speaker 1: house somewhat almost paid off before they bring kids into
24:26
Speaker 1: the picture. So people like that that have planned and
24:30
Speaker 1: they know what's going to happen. So when he gets married,
24:34
Speaker 1: they've already discussed all of us. All of us has
24:36
Speaker 1: already been discussed. So when he proposes, he might they
24:41
Speaker 1: might go ahead on and start talking about these things
24:45
Speaker 1: as far as marriage and commitment and what's gonna happen
24:49
Speaker 1: if this happened and that happened, and they get that
24:51
Speaker 1: step in writing, so they may go ahead on and
24:55
Speaker 1: talk to somebody a pastor about their relationship before they
24:59
Speaker 1: getting and they might go ahead and do what's called
25:02
Speaker 1: a marriage contract. Or a prenup, whichever one that chose
25:04
Speaker 1: to do. And so when he proposes the pastors there
25:07
Speaker 1: they get married and they look happily ever after because
25:10
Speaker 1: they planned everything, whereas people that don't plan nothing, you
25:14
Speaker 1: end up becoming screwed. And which is why so many
25:16
Speaker 1: people get divorced because the person you thought you were
25:20
Speaker 1: marrying is not the actual person that they are. And
25:23
Speaker 1: you really never knew them in the first place because
25:24
Speaker 1: you never got to You never really got to know them,
25:27
Speaker 1: You never even til the time to get to know them.
25:28
Speaker 1: So how can you know somebody that you barely know.
25:32
Speaker 1: So when you walk to the beat of your own
25:34
Speaker 1: drum and you do the things that you want to do,
25:38
Speaker 1: it is based on you. It ain't based on everybody else.
25:41
Speaker 1: Because if it's just you and there's nobody gonna be
25:44
Speaker 1: impacted and affected by you, then do what you feel.
25:47
Speaker 1: But if other people are gonna be impacted by it,
25:50
Speaker 1: then no. So if it's something negative that you know
25:54
Speaker 1: it's gonna impact you in a negative manner, then the
25:56
Speaker 1: answer should be no. If you're someone that needs to
26:00
Speaker 1: release emotions, close your eyes, think of the word that
26:04
Speaker 1: you feel today and think back to when it first happened,
26:08
Speaker 1: when the first time you went through it, and then
26:10
Speaker 1: you relinquish it, and you may cry afterwards, you may
26:14
Speaker 1: take a moment. It might take a little bit for
26:17
Speaker 1: it to hit you, but then when it does, it's okay.
26:20
Speaker 1: If it does, if you break down crying hours later,
26:23
Speaker 1: it's okay because right now you're just trying to It's
26:27
Speaker 1: something you've never done as far as relinquishing things. So
26:32
Speaker 1: when you relinquish it, you may cry, you may be angry,
26:37
Speaker 1: and that's okay too for you to feel that way
26:40
Speaker 1: because you were relinquishing it. But guess how Guess how
26:43
Speaker 1: good you're gonna feel when you relinquish all of the
26:47
Speaker 1: emotions that are attacked to all these people, When you
26:50
Speaker 1: relinquish all the rejections and how you felt about that rejection,
26:54
Speaker 1: the insecurities, the doubts, the fears. Once you relinquish it,
26:59
Speaker 1: you're gonna feel a lot better. Better. So now when
27:01
Speaker 1: you do things, you don't feel in fear, your insecurities
27:05
Speaker 1: are not holding you back. When somebody says something to
27:07
Speaker 1: try to make you feel less than what you are,
27:10
Speaker 1: you're not gonna feed into that because you know who
27:12
Speaker 1: you are as a person. You know what you represent,
27:14
Speaker 1: you know what you bring to the table. You have standards,
27:18
Speaker 1: and your standards is not what somebody look like. Your
27:21
Speaker 1: standards are gonna be based on morals, values, principles. At
27:24
Speaker 1: this critical thinking, common sense, in common judgment, weighing the
27:27
Speaker 1: pros and cons doing your research, having intellect, knowledge and education,
27:32
Speaker 1: but also the consequence are because in karm of your actions,
27:35
Speaker 1: behave your choice and decisions and others that are associated
27:40
Speaker 1: with you and how they're impacted. So when you acknowledge
27:45
Speaker 1: and consume things, you're gonna research to make sure is
27:47
Speaker 1: this something that's even worth my time? And if it is,
27:50
Speaker 1: then carry on. If it ain't, then hey it ain't.
27:55
Speaker 1: So I get it. I completely and utterly understand. So
28:00
Speaker 1: like right now, I'm sitting outside and I'm looking at
28:04
Speaker 1: the at the back of my apartment, and I'm looking
28:08
Speaker 1: outside my slide door, and it's I probably if I
28:13
Speaker 1: sat outside and feel good outside, But I'm trying to
28:16
Speaker 1: wait until these walls are gone, cause apparently there's a
28:19
Speaker 1: Walt's nest not that far from They got rid of
28:23
Speaker 1: all the Walts nests around my actual apartment, but on
28:28
Speaker 1: the building itself there are some Walts nests they have
28:33
Speaker 1: to get rid of. So once they get rid of
28:36
Speaker 1: them all, some of them might come back and they
28:38
Speaker 1: might decide to build a little Wafts nest. So even
28:42
Speaker 1: if they get rid of them, it doesn't mean they're
28:43
Speaker 1: not gonna come back. Doesn't mean they're not gonna build
28:46
Speaker 1: another Walt's nest. But I haven't seen as many Walts
28:49
Speaker 1: as I used to, But there was one here earlier.
28:52
Speaker 1: It's gone. But at the end of the day, you know,
28:57
Speaker 1: sometimes people come to what's familiar. So when these walls realize,
29:01
Speaker 1: oh my god, our nesta, don't they go They might
29:04
Speaker 1: either build another nest and they might walk away from
29:06
Speaker 1: it and say, this ain't where I need to be,
29:09
Speaker 1: And that's okay too. So sometimes even though something's destroyed,
29:15
Speaker 1: even though your environment and even though the people around
29:20
Speaker 1: you are your comfortability, but that don't mean you need
29:23
Speaker 1: to be there, doesn't mean that you don't need to
29:26
Speaker 1: move forward. Can't move forward if you're still stagnant. You
29:29
Speaker 1: can't move forward. If you don't achieve anything, have no discipline,
29:33
Speaker 1: no determination, no drive, You're not gonna get nowhere. So
29:37
Speaker 1: until you let go of what doesn't serve you, until
29:40
Speaker 1: you walk to the beat of your own drum and
29:44
Speaker 1: understand people just add us track to your life. Determine
29:47
Speaker 1: which people actually have your back and which ones don't,
29:49
Speaker 1: which ones are giving you actual real advice, and which
29:51
Speaker 1: people are trying to lead and take advantage of you.
29:54
Speaker 1: Which one of these people actually want to see you
29:56
Speaker 1: win or see you fail? But either way it go.
30:00
Speaker 1: It is something that you have to figure out. So
30:03
Speaker 1: once you have the tools as far as healing and recovery,
30:08
Speaker 1: the last thing you wan't is for all the work
30:12
Speaker 1: you've done to heal and recovery from anything, whether it's physically,
30:16
Speaker 1: internally and externally illnesses and diseases, getting into the job,
30:21
Speaker 1: building a business and brand, becoming successful, having a great
30:26
Speaker 1: marriage and relationship despite your past experiences, raising great kids. So,
30:32
Speaker 1: regardless of what you are doing, do you really want
30:36
Speaker 1: to go back to starting constantly starting over or do
30:41
Speaker 1: you want to continue to grow, evolve, and elevate despite
30:48
Speaker 1: the many situations and people that are negative that's trying
30:50
Speaker 1: to knock you down. That's the question. So when you
30:54
Speaker 1: sit there and you think about it, you be like,
30:56
Speaker 1: I worked hard to lose the weight. The last thing
30:58
Speaker 1: you want is to get it back, so you're gonna
31:00
Speaker 1: do whatever you need to do to maintain that weight.
31:03
Speaker 1: So even if you lose five pounds gain five pounds,
31:07
Speaker 1: the point is either where go I would rather say
31:09
Speaker 1: I've gained two or three pounds then gain forty. So
31:14
Speaker 1: you're never gonna get to the point where you're gonna
31:17
Speaker 1: be off kilter too bad. Cause there might be times
31:21
Speaker 1: that you might get off your kilter a little bit,
31:25
Speaker 1: and that's okay if you do, because you're always you know,
31:29
Speaker 1: lose the weight and you can always gain it back.
31:32
Speaker 1: But some people, when it comes to losing weight, they
31:34
Speaker 1: may not They may be okay with it. You don't
31:37
Speaker 1: wanna lose too much weight. Some people, once they start
31:41
Speaker 1: exercising real aggressively, they slow down. They start more so
31:46
Speaker 1: toning their body to maintain the muscles that they have.
31:49
Speaker 1: They're not trying to build any more muscles, because once
31:53
Speaker 1: you start exercising and you don't have any more fat,
31:57
Speaker 1: then you're starting to burn muscle and stuff you want
32:00
Speaker 1: to do, so you need to maintain that. So it's
32:03
Speaker 1: really about maintaining and that's why you'll see a lot
32:06
Speaker 1: of people that have reached their goals. They work out,
32:09
Speaker 1: but they're not doing these extensive workouts. Yeah, you might
32:13
Speaker 1: see them do one extent workout a week, but for
32:16
Speaker 1: the most part, they're probably lifting weights, they're probably walking,
32:20
Speaker 1: They're probably doing some type of like stepping exercise. They
32:25
Speaker 1: might you know, do their sit ups and push ups,
32:29
Speaker 1: but their workouts might be thirty minutes, maybe twice a week.
32:33
Speaker 1: So they're not working out as much as somebody's trying
32:36
Speaker 1: to lose weight that works out five times a week,
32:39
Speaker 1: four times a week, three times a week. So on you,
32:43
Speaker 1: once you get to it, you're just maintaining. Once you
32:46
Speaker 1: build your business and your brain and become successful, you're
32:49
Speaker 1: now pretty much a CEO. So like miss Stacy was staying,
32:55
Speaker 1: she went from being a coach to doing everything herself,
32:57
Speaker 1: and now she has coaches that are teaching her curriculums,
33:01
Speaker 1: also building their own, and she has people that do
33:04
Speaker 1: all her social media, all of it all because she
33:08
Speaker 1: went from you know, doing it all herself to now
33:13
Speaker 1: people helping her own a journey. So again, it's gonna
33:17
Speaker 1: start with you. Everything starts with you. Your journey of
33:20
Speaker 1: your health and wellness, your journey of building a business,
33:23
Speaker 1: your journeys of the people you bring into your life.
33:25
Speaker 1: It starts with you, and yes, you are what you attract,
33:29
Speaker 1: but do you want to really attract the wrong type
33:32
Speaker 1: of people? That's gonna basically have you building, trying to
33:36
Speaker 1: build them, lowering yourself. You're not getting done what you
33:40
Speaker 1: need to do because you're trying to build somebody else.
33:42
Speaker 1: You're trying to love somebody who doesn't love you, trying
33:45
Speaker 1: to make somebody accept you who has rejected you the
33:48
Speaker 1: first time. Is it really worth you going through all
33:52
Speaker 1: of that? Answers No. So when you walk to the
33:54
Speaker 1: beat of your own drum, as you walk through this journey,
33:58
Speaker 1: this journey, you're gonna build your can and you're not
34:00
Speaker 1: even gonna realize that you did. And all you did
34:03
Speaker 1: was exactly what I did on this podcast, just posted
34:07
Speaker 1: it once you posted. When we used to go live
34:10
Speaker 1: on Spreaker, I would go live, do podcast, post it,
34:14
Speaker 1: that was it. But now we can't go live anymore,
34:17
Speaker 1: so we have to pre record our videos. That's okay.
34:21
Speaker 1: So in the end, all you did, all I did
34:23
Speaker 1: was just do a podcast, and now I got people
34:25
Speaker 1: wanted to be on the podcast and being guested on
34:28
Speaker 1: my podcast. And then when I actually do the in
34:30
Speaker 1: some of the videos I do post, because I do
34:32
Speaker 1: also do them visually and I do post them. So again,
34:36
Speaker 1: now I'm trying to get into the Jay Shetty Wren
34:39
Speaker 1: and trying to get into that element. But at the
34:42
Speaker 1: same time, I'm also showing my journey, how I got there,
34:46
Speaker 1: how I make before I made a professional how I'm
34:48
Speaker 1: just starting off just learning and now that I'm ready
34:51
Speaker 1: to do it professionally, here I am so here we are.
34:54
Speaker 1: So in conclusion to this, I would say to you
34:58
Speaker 1: that when you do things, test it out, try it out.
35:04
Speaker 1: And I also don't edit your videos. Don't edit what
35:08
Speaker 1: you do at first. Why because you want to learn
35:10
Speaker 1: about what you did wrong. You can't learn what you
35:13
Speaker 1: did wrong if you don't leave the mistakes you've made.
35:19
Speaker 1: From the very beginning, when I started this, I said,
35:22
Speaker 1: I'm going to leave my mistakes in these podcasts because
35:27
Speaker 1: if I didn't do that, I would not know how
35:31
Speaker 1: to do them better. I wouldn't know where I need
35:33
Speaker 1: to improve, and I will keep doing the same thing
35:36
Speaker 1: over and over and over again. So that's how I
35:40
Speaker 1: got better. Because I can go back and listen to
35:42
Speaker 1: my podcast. Listen when I was shuffling, listening when I
35:46
Speaker 1: didn't have equipment, listening when I was just doing for
35:48
Speaker 1: my phone listening, when I have people in the house,
35:52
Speaker 1: and that's okay, it is, it's okay. So there's nothing
35:58
Speaker 1: wrong with you the mistakes you've made, because when you
36:03
Speaker 1: go professional and you finally do a professional people gonna
36:09
Speaker 1: see the difference. They're gonna like, oh, it sounds so
36:13
Speaker 1: much different. Oh my gosh, she looks so much different.
36:16
Speaker 1: Like when you see people doing their videos and they
36:19
Speaker 1: may do their morning inspirations for bed in bed like
36:21
Speaker 1: I do on YouTube. Sometimes that's because if something speaks
36:25
Speaker 1: to me, I speak while I'm in bed, and then
36:26
Speaker 1: I might get up. I might do my stuff. So
36:29
Speaker 1: not everybody's gonna be doing their podcast or doing you know,
36:33
Speaker 1: healing and recovery and they get up in there in
36:35
Speaker 1: the suit. Sometimes that person may be going through something
36:38
Speaker 1: and saying, look, I'm sick. I know I'm supposed to
36:40
Speaker 1: be doing these podcasts, but I have surgery. So they
36:45
Speaker 1: might be in bed for whatever reason. But it's not
36:47
Speaker 1: because of laziness. It's because regardless of how you feel,
36:51
Speaker 1: you still gotta get up and still do what you
36:52
Speaker 1: need to do. But in the end, when you get
36:54
Speaker 1: better and you feel better, then you're gonna do your
36:57
Speaker 1: podcast and you're gonna do a professionally and you're gonna
36:59
Speaker 1: be fine. So again, why stop because you get sick,
37:02
Speaker 1: Why stop because you get knocked down. Continue doing what
37:07
Speaker 1: you're doing, continue to thrive, continue to be the best
37:09
Speaker 1: version of yourself. But you're gonna have to walk to
37:13
Speaker 1: the back. You're gonna have to walk through this journey
37:15
Speaker 1: on your own. You gonna have to walk to the
37:18
Speaker 1: beat of your own drum. You gotta take everything that
37:20
Speaker 1: you learn and apply what works for you, and the
37:22
Speaker 1: things you don't, relinquish it, let it go. And then
37:26
Speaker 1: as you continue on, there gonna be more things you're
37:28
Speaker 1: gonna relinquish. There gonna be more things you're gonna add.
37:31
Speaker 1: And that's fine. But if every day you're not adding
37:35
Speaker 1: and relinquishing, adding and subtracting every single day, you will
37:38
Speaker 1: not get no better. You will not grow. If you
37:42
Speaker 1: try to be like everybody else and do like everybody else,
37:44
Speaker 1: and think like everybody else, and so on and so forth,
37:48
Speaker 1: you will not be the person you wanna be. You
37:50
Speaker 1: will not be an individual. If you are in groups
37:55
Speaker 1: and if you're in groups, there's no guarantee you're gonna
37:57
Speaker 1: shine where if you're by yourself, or you get people
38:02
Speaker 1: like say, for example, you're on a losing team. You
38:05
Speaker 1: go to school with the losing team that's never won
38:07
Speaker 1: a championship ever. You get there and you motivate every
38:11
Speaker 1: single last person on that team, and then the next
38:15
Speaker 1: thing you know, you have pretty much got them. The
38:18
Speaker 1: first year winning twenty games, second year you made it
38:23
Speaker 1: to the playoffs, third year you won a championship. The
38:28
Speaker 1: next year you won a secondary championship. And now this
38:32
Speaker 1: team has now thrived because of you. And now the
38:36
Speaker 1: next person that comes that's under you, that's gonna take
38:40
Speaker 1: your place when you graduate, can now take the next
38:43
Speaker 1: group of people and motivate them the same way. And
38:47
Speaker 1: now you get all these people, these scouts, and all
38:51
Speaker 1: these people that seen you go through this journey and
38:55
Speaker 1: now want to give you scholarships full scholarships, all because
39:01
Speaker 1: you help your team make it to the playoffs, a
39:03
Speaker 1: team that nobody ever thought would ever win. So it's
39:07
Speaker 1: not always about going to the winning team. It's not
39:10
Speaker 1: always going and looking for things. Sometimes you can speak
39:14
Speaker 1: things into existence, do the work and post it, and
39:18
Speaker 1: right in the very beginning, it may seem like nobody's
39:20
Speaker 1: gonna look at your work. But then the next thing
39:23
Speaker 1: you know, everybody they Mama is coming on your platform.
39:26
Speaker 1: Don't even know how this happened. Now everybody is seeing
39:29
Speaker 1: what you do. All you can do is just put
39:31
Speaker 1: something out there and see who resonates with it and
39:35
Speaker 1: who's meant to see it. If you give it to
39:37
Speaker 1: God and let God, you know, guide you through it,
39:40
Speaker 1: God will bring the people that need your whatever it
39:44
Speaker 1: is that you do. So just have faith, have discipline,
39:48
Speaker 1: determination and drive. That's about it. With that being said,
39:52
Speaker 1: I thank y'all for joining me for this episode. I
39:54
Speaker 1: am Goddess Ausha Marianna. I appreciate y'all and I will
39:58
Speaker 1: see y'all next week. Bye. Like