Latest / Four Finger Discount (Simpsons Podcast) / Judge Me Tender (S21E23)

Transcript

Judge Me Tender (S21E23) · Four Finger Discount (Simpsons Podcast)

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Why are you ragging on me? I'm just doing what
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: you said. Hmm, let me think.
• 0:05
  Speaker 2: Why would I try to sabotage a new judge who
• 0:07
  Speaker 2: just might do what I do for $ 48 million less?
• 0:10
  Speaker 3: Hey, hey, hey, I've been double-crossed here. You're pretty smart, huh, Simon?
• 0:14
  Speaker 3: Let's see how smart you are with your voice.
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: Box hanging out. Label to camera, label to camera.
• 0:21
  Speaker 3: Oh, sorry, sorry.
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: Ah, you bastard!
• 0:24
  Speaker 3: Four-finger discount, dude.
• 0:29
  Speaker 1: Judge me tender. What's the next line? I can't remember,
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: but this is Four Finger Discount. I'm Dando. And I'm Guy.
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: We actually, oh, we are recording. Yes. Oh, wow. I
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: thought you were just doing a bit of me, me, me, me, me, me. Yeah,
• 0:56
  Speaker 1: you are.
• 0:57
  Speaker 2: Wow.
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: Judge me tender. This episode was shit. This episode was
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: not so sweet. I'm Dando.
• 1:05
  Speaker 4: Yes, this is our review of Judge Me Tender, the
• 1:07
  Speaker 4: season finale of season 21 here at Four Finger Discount.
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: How are you doing, sir? I'm good. I'm Guy, by
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: the way. We already did introduce ourselves, but let's, you know. Me, me, me, ma. Me, me, me, me, me.
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: What does Wiggum say? Me, me, ma. Me, me, ma, ma, me. Me, me, ma, ma.
• 1:19
  Speaker 5: Me, me, ma, ma.
• 1:21
  Speaker 1: Really obsessed with dogs. What a dick. He deserves to
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: get a touch of that moment. Was he just trying
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: to rile them up so they would attack the riders?
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: It's like that kid.
• 1:31
  Speaker 4: We've had several birthday parties over the years, right? Been
• 1:34
  Speaker 4: to several birthday parties as well. There's always that one
• 1:36
  Speaker 4: kid at every party who's just there to rile people up.
• 1:39
  Speaker 4: Just poking that bear, poking that bear, and then when
• 1:42
  Speaker 4: the bear swipes.
• 1:42
  Speaker 1: Back, they're like... You poked it first, buddy. You poked
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: the bear. Shouldn't have poked the bear.
• 1:48
  Speaker 4: But judge me tender, as far as season finales go,
• 1:50
  Speaker 4: this was pretty nothing.
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: It felt very.
• 1:54
  Speaker 4: When people say to me, I don't watch Modern Simpsons because...
• 1:57
  Speaker 4: One of the excuses always seems to be, it's that
• 2:00
  Speaker 4: they just put in guest stars for the sake of
• 2:02
  Speaker 4: guest stars. They didn't give them good roles. It was
• 2:04
  Speaker 4: just guest star and guest star and guest star. And
• 2:05
  Speaker 4: they always fall back on the Lady Gaga episode, right? Which, yeah, granted,
• 2:08
  Speaker 4: it wasn't a great episode. But when I hear that,
• 2:11
  Speaker 4: I always go, I'm not buying it. I feel like
• 2:13
  Speaker 4: we've sat through them.
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: We've reviewed them.
• 2:15
  Speaker 4: And it doesn't feel like there's been that many episodes
• 2:17
  Speaker 4: where it's just like, here's a guest star for the
• 2:18
  Speaker 4: sake of a guest star. There's been moments, but not
• 2:21
  Speaker 4: all the time. This one felt like, hey- Hey, everybody.
• 2:24
  Speaker 4: Here's Simon Cowell.
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Hey, guys.
• 2:26
  Speaker 4: Remember that show that is also on Fox? Let's promote
• 2:29
  Speaker 4: the shit out of that and get the guest stars
• 2:30
  Speaker 4: on there to say stuff that's not funny.
• 2:33
  Speaker 1: Correct. Yeah. I mean- After Mo goes to LA, the
• 2:36
  Speaker 1: episode's not funny. No. Randy, yeah. Randy on the American
• 2:40
  Speaker 1: Idol judging panel does his thing. It's a slight variation
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: on the stuff that he does on Idol. There's a
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: woman named Cara who both of us forgot was actually
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: on Idol. We had to Wikipedia and we've still- pretty
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: much forgotten about already. I was not watching American Idol.
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: Ellen was on? Ellen DeGeneres was on? Apparently so. I'd
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: forgotten all about that as well, but then we weren't
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: watching American Idol. We had Australian Idol.
• 3:02
  Speaker 4: Ellen DeGeneres in particular was the biggest flashback for me.
• 3:05
  Speaker 4: I was like, well, remember when she was a thing?
• 3:06
  Speaker 1: Oh, my goodness. Doing the dance. I always have one
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: of my favorite bits of the episode, but it's an
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: interesting part of this episode, absolutely. I mean, who would
• 3:16
  Speaker 1: have thought that Ellen would have turned out to be
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: the evil one? Yeah. And Simon Cowell, who is the
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: quote-unquote big bad of this episode, perhaps.
• 3:24
  Speaker 4: His second appearance, I at least enjoyed the fact that
• 3:27
  Speaker 4: he was willing to play the heel.
• 3:28
  Speaker 1: True.
• 3:29
  Speaker 4: Which fits his real-life persona, I know. But I just thought... Well,
• 3:34
  Speaker 4: to me, that last bit with the American Idol scene, right?
• 3:37
  Speaker 4: It just felt like sort of one of those cross-promo
• 3:40
  Speaker 4: little five-minute bits they just sort of put on saying...
• 3:42
  Speaker 4: Stay tuned for the end of the episode because the Simpsons,
• 3:44
  Speaker 4: Moe's going to be making a special cameo on tonight's
• 3:46
  Speaker 4: episode of American Idol.
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: It didn't feel like a Simpsons episode. No.
• 3:49
  Speaker 4: It felt like one of those little five minute filler
• 3:50
  Speaker 4: bits that you just make for things. And it's like,
• 3:52
  Speaker 4: where's the joke here?
• 3:53
  Speaker 1: It felt like a commercial.
• 3:54
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 3:55
  Speaker 4: It's just, it was, everyone just said, it's like, is
• 3:59
  Speaker 4: the joke the fact that it's like, because everything they
• 4:01
  Speaker 4: said was stupid, right? It's like, oh, that's Randy being Randy. Oh,
• 4:03
  Speaker 4: that's Alan being Alan. Oh, it's Cara being Cara. It's like,
• 4:06
  Speaker 4: but where's the joke?
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 4:08
  Speaker 4: Is the joke the fact that it's like, oh, that's
• 4:10
  Speaker 4: what they really like on the show in real life.
• 4:12
  Speaker 4: And then Mo does what Simon tells him to do
• 4:15
  Speaker 4: and then Simon ridicules him for it and it's like,
• 4:17
  Speaker 4: but where's the joke?
• 4:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah. How is this funny? That bit sort of moves
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: the story forward or it's kind of dramatically satisfying, I guess,
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: but at the same time, we are watching a comedy here.
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: We should be able to sort of, you know, fold
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: a joke or two into that.
• 4:31
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 4:31
  Speaker 1: I was, look, I don't think I was as let
• 4:34
  Speaker 1: down by this episode as you seem to be. It
• 4:36
  Speaker 1: wasn't like let down. I was just fucking ten. I
• 4:37
  Speaker 1: was like, ugh. Well, it's kind of disappointing because it
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: feels like it's the end of the year, guys. I mean,
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: you've had that day at the end, the last day
• 4:44
  Speaker 1: of school where it's like no one's doing any work today.
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: Teacher pulls the TV out on wheels. Oh, shit. We're
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: going to watch Round the Twist again. Not even the
• 4:53
  Speaker 1: teachers are doing work. But you're sort of like, what
• 4:55
  Speaker 1: are you going to do? Expel me for not doing–
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: am I going to put me in detention for not
• 4:58
  Speaker 1: doing my homework? Come on, man. It's the last day
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: of school. And this is– It's the last episode of
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: the year. Let's not put too much effort into it, unfortunately.
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: It feels like there was some effort in some ways.
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: I think this is... Yeah, I like a Moe-centric episode.
• 5:13
  Speaker 1: And I think this did all right by Moe. I mean,
• 5:16
  Speaker 1: I like when he gets the chance to sort of
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: have a win in some ways. Yeah. And him being
• 5:21
  Speaker 1: an expert heckler, I thought was pretty funny. And, yeah,
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: being able to sort of weaponize that or monetize that
• 5:26
  Speaker 1: or whatever.
• 5:27
  Speaker 4: See, I would have preferred, rather than him becoming a
• 5:29
  Speaker 4: good judge... It was, he goes to various shows and
• 5:32
  Speaker 4: just becomes a professional heckler as opposed to a judge. Hey,
• 5:36
  Speaker 4: we want you to judge our thing. It's like, but
• 5:38
  Speaker 4: he's not judging. He's just ridiculing. Well, that's a little workshop.
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: Okay, let's try and reframe this episode. Let's make Mo
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: like a secret heckler or something or a secret web.
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: Other comedians. Crusty Highs. Yes. Crusty Highs was like- This
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: guy's trying to muscle into my act. He's doing his
• 5:55
  Speaker 1: stand-up show. You go there, heckling, throw him off his game.
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: Do it so well, he never wants to do comedy again.
• 5:59
  Speaker 1: And Mo does that. And he goes from club to club,
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: and he's just like, nah, you... And then rather than getting...
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: He's extending my heckling. You suck.
• 6:05
  Speaker 4: Rather than getting the guys from the American Idol judging panel,
• 6:09
  Speaker 4: get other comedians again in.
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: Sure. And Mo heckles them. Yeah, and Mo rises through
• 6:15
  Speaker 1: the ranks to the point where he's at like a
• 6:16
  Speaker 1: stadium gig for someone like... Yeah, I don't know who was...
• 6:21
  Speaker 1: Will Arnett.
• 6:22
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: I'm trying to think of, like, stating comedians that there's, like,
• 6:25
  Speaker 1: Sebastian Maniscalco or Nat Bogazzi or someone like that. And,
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: you know, thousands of people are just like, yay, we
• 6:32
  Speaker 1: love you, Nate. And the emoji is like, you suck.
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: I think you can even get, like, a British comedian
• 6:37
  Speaker 1: and just have him go, you're British. Hey, nice teeth. Oh, no. Yeah.
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: That's so much funnier. I'm not saying we made this
• 6:47
  Speaker 1: episode better, but we kind of made this episode better.
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: But then you wouldn't have the cross-promotion slash synergy with
• 6:54
  Speaker 1: American Idol. This feels like Fox said, hey, do a tie-in,
• 6:57
  Speaker 1: make it work. Yeah. And at the very end of
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: this episode, see, I'm sorry. I think I've already forgotten it.
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: But hey, this has another guest appearance by billionaire tyrant
• 7:08
  Speaker 1: Rupert Murdoch. Yeah. Does Mo heckle him in any way? No. No,
• 7:12
  Speaker 1: it's just like, oh, thanks for being here, Rupert, or
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: something like that. Show some balls. Have Mo heckle Murdoch
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: and then have Murdoch heckle him back or something like that. Oh,
• 7:24
  Speaker 1: that's me told. Because you just put some Leno on
• 7:26
  Speaker 1: the TV. That's it. And then they rag on Leno
• 7:30
  Speaker 1: a bit. They get Leno to rag on NBC. Oh,
• 7:34
  Speaker 1: that's right. And then Murdoch laughs at it and that's it. Yeah. Hilarious.
• 7:39
  Speaker 4: It would have been funnier if Simon Cowell and Randy
• 7:42
  Speaker 4: came to Springfield for auditions and all the Springfield people
• 7:45
  Speaker 4: are trying to audition for American Idol. That's so much
• 7:48
  Speaker 4: funnier than Moe just appearing for the last five minutes
• 7:50
  Speaker 4: on American Idol as a judge.
• 7:51
  Speaker 1: That's right. Yeah, and they're all doing their thing. This
• 7:54
  Speaker 1: isn't a talent show. It's like someone's juggling or whatever. Yeah,
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: but Cowell is trying to be like his bitchy self
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: or whatever, but Moe's in the background. Ah, you suck. Sorry,
• 8:04
  Speaker 1: I know that's my go-to for every Moe heckle or
• 8:06
  Speaker 1: Moe insult. I thought the heckle story would work. I
• 8:09
  Speaker 1: think the heckler story would be fantastic. And then they realize, oh,
• 8:14
  Speaker 1: I'm most stealing my bit. He's so much better at
• 8:16
  Speaker 1: this than I am or something. And then something happens
• 8:18
  Speaker 1: as a result. I'm sorry. I'm coming up with this
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: on the fly. Yeah. But anyway. It took us 35 seconds. Yeah.
• 8:25
  Speaker 1: But that whole... You're not wrong. That whole heckler story,
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: not bad. Yeah.
• 8:30
  Speaker 4: I didn't mind the premise of the idea of... Now
• 8:33
  Speaker 4: Homer can't go to Moe, so he's at home all
• 8:35
  Speaker 4: the time, and Marge gets sick of having him there.
• 8:37
  Speaker 1: It's not a bad B story. But they didn't do
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: enough with it. The end bit of the golf, I
• 8:42
  Speaker 1: was like- Oh, I actually didn't mind that because I
• 8:45
  Speaker 1: know enough golfers who will just- Yeah, that's right. Golf
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: is your life now. Yeah. Yeah, that's true. But still,
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: I don't know. I know that you're a bit of
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: a sucker for when Homer and Marge- get intimate or
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: rediscover their connection or whatever. I thought that was kind
• 9:03
  Speaker 1: of cute in this one. It could have been funnier,
• 9:06
  Speaker 1: but I don't know. It's a B plot, so we
• 9:09
  Speaker 1: can't expect too much from it. I think there's an
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: episode there where Homer loses his job. Not that he
• 9:13
  Speaker 1: works anymore anyway, but he loses his job, so he's
• 9:15
  Speaker 1: home all the time. And so basically he's learning what
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: Marge does a lot. He respects Marge. He's like, oh
• 9:23
  Speaker 1: my God, you... I didn't realize you do all these things.
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: And so he tries to help out. Yeah, I didn't
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: realize you worked when I was at work.
• 9:29
  Speaker 4: Yeah, that kind of thing. And he's like, I should
• 9:31
  Speaker 4: be supporting you. So he tries to help out by
• 9:33
  Speaker 4: doing the shopping and he fucks everything up. Marge is like,
• 9:35
  Speaker 4: go back to work. I don't want to hear anymore.
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: And I think that would have been a funnier story.
• 9:39
  Speaker 1: We kind of got that. This sounds akin to what
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: we were talking about in our previous episode, The Bomb
• 9:45
  Speaker 1: Next Door. It's like, Go clean your room, kids. You're
• 9:47
  Speaker 1: not cleaning your room right.
• 9:51
  Speaker 4: I just felt that there could have been more done
• 9:52
  Speaker 4: with that B plot. There was more than what you got.
• 9:56
  Speaker 1: It didn't really feel that fleshed out. It just felt like, yeah.
• 9:59
  Speaker 1: It wasn't bad. I was just like, ah. Homer is home.
• 10:02
  Speaker 1: He's under Marge's feet. It's getting to the point where
• 10:05
  Speaker 1: it's like, oh, I don't like him around. Okay, I'm
• 10:07
  Speaker 1: going to find a way to get him out. Oh,
• 10:09
  Speaker 1: wait a minute. He's out all the time. I'll never
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: see him again. And, oh, I do love him. Let's
• 10:14
  Speaker 1: go home and have some hot sex. Yeah. By the way,
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: great staying power. If he's just finished, which I'm assuming
• 10:19
  Speaker 1: he's just finished, it's like, Marge, let's go again. I've
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: been doing this since I was 12. What is that
• 10:27
  Speaker 1: line from? I've been doing that since last week. What
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: is that line from Fight Club? I've been fucked like
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: that since grade school. You're like, oh, boy. All right,
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: but what else can we talk about?
• 10:38
  Speaker 4: What I want to touch on, I mentioned it in
• 10:39
  Speaker 4: the previous season 21 episode, Bob Next Door. So much
• 10:44
  Speaker 4: of this episode felt like it was just listing things
• 10:49
  Speaker 4: and just sign gags. So normally the Simpsons in the
• 10:52
  Speaker 4: classic era, what they would do is they'd be walking
• 10:54
  Speaker 4: along the street and they'd be having a conversation and
• 10:56
  Speaker 4: in the background there'd be various signs. In this one,
• 10:59
  Speaker 4: there was no dialogue. It was just, here's a bunch
• 11:02
  Speaker 4: of signs, read them and enjoy them as opposed to
• 11:04
  Speaker 4: writing jokes. It was like, here's some sign gags, but
• 11:07
  Speaker 4: we won't have them saying anything so you can focus
• 11:09
  Speaker 4: on the sign gags.
• 11:10
  Speaker 1: It used to be- Or it'd be a very brief
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: cutaway to, it's like, here we are at, yes, needs
• 11:15
  Speaker 1: feed and seed. Yeah. Warmly chucks. Yes.
• 11:19
  Speaker 4: But now it's just like, it's almost like they're trying
• 11:22
  Speaker 4: to boast, look at our sign gags, guys. We're not
• 11:24
  Speaker 4: going to write any jokes so you don't get distracted.
• 11:25
  Speaker 4: Just read, just read. And it's like, we're going to-
• 11:27
  Speaker 4: These are meant to be texture. For like 10 seconds,
• 11:29
  Speaker 4: there's like no dialogue because it's walking past all these signs.
• 11:32
  Speaker 4: And I'm like, you used to be writing lines here.
• 11:34
  Speaker 4: And then when the guy just lists off all those
• 11:37
  Speaker 4: reality shows, I was like, this isn't TV writing.
• 11:42
  Speaker 1: This is just you.
• 11:43
  Speaker 4: Listing shit and filling time. This is fun in the
• 11:45
  Speaker 4: writer's room. This is like, you couldn't pick what were
• 11:48
  Speaker 4: your three favorites. Let's just have them list them all.
• 11:50
  Speaker 4: That'll be the joke.
• 11:51
  Speaker 1: Like, I guess. Yeah. And to the point where it's like...
• 11:55
  Speaker 1: Mo has to acknowledge it's like, that's a big list,
• 11:56
  Speaker 1: isn't it? Yeah, that's a lot of names. I appreciate
• 11:59
  Speaker 1: that you did all these. I can't be arsed writing
• 12:01
  Speaker 1: them down. I wrote them all down. Part of me
• 12:03
  Speaker 1: was like, I hope Dan knows writing these down. Yes,
• 12:06
  Speaker 1: I wrote them all down.
• 12:07
  Speaker 4: And before we get into our favourite moments, there's another
• 12:10
  Speaker 4: subplot of this episode, which goes fucking nowhere.
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: Tell me more. So Santa's little helper can apparently understand English. Oh, yeah.
• 12:16
  Speaker 4: And is now self-conscious of his image. Then Lisa goes
• 12:18
  Speaker 4: and says, let's scoot together. And they start scooting around
• 12:21
  Speaker 4: on their arse.
• 12:22
  Speaker 1: And it's like, That felt almost like a studio note
• 12:25
  Speaker 1: or something. What the hell is going on? And that's it.
• 12:27
  Speaker 1: You've done that throwaway gag where you've made Santa's little
• 12:31
  Speaker 1: helper the ugliest dog.
• 12:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: And the dog gets self-conscious and goes, oh, I'm ugly apparently.
• 12:37
  Speaker 1: And then get the feeling, yeah, it's like someone at
• 12:42
  Speaker 1: Simpsons HQ, maybe James L. Brooks has a dog. And
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: he's like, we can't have the dog feeling bad about itself.
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: Let's have just a quick scene where Lisa makes the
• 12:51
  Speaker 1: dog feel better about itself. I didn't hate the scene.
• 12:56
  Speaker 1: I don't like the motivation behind it. I feel it
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: was not necessary, but I liked how it played out regardless.
• 13:01
  Speaker 1: I thought that's kind of cute that she's playing with
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: the dog and trying to make it feel better about itself,
• 13:05
  Speaker 1: even if the execution of it is kind of sloppy.
• 13:08
  Speaker 4: See, I don't like when they have conversations with the pets,
• 13:12
  Speaker 4: particularly Santa's little helper, and he just supposedly understands fluent English.
• 13:16
  Speaker 1: Well, yeah. Right.
• 13:17
  Speaker 4: At the end of the day, the Simpsons have always
• 13:19
  Speaker 4: talked to the dog, right? And it's understood certain things, right?
• 13:22
  Speaker 4: But usually it's Homer saying, what did you do that for?
• 13:26
  Speaker 1: And he's like, oh. It's like dogs understand the demeanor, right? Yes, indeed.
• 13:29
  Speaker 4: This is just Lisa saying, it's okay, little buddy. I
• 13:31
  Speaker 4: know you're feeling bad about your image, but I feel
• 13:34
  Speaker 4: bad about it too. I'm an American girl in 2010
• 13:35
  Speaker 4: or whatever. And he's just understanding her.
• 13:37
  Speaker 1: I was like- This is stupid. Yeah, just scratch him
• 13:42
  Speaker 1: behind his ears and go, you're a good dog. You're
• 13:43
  Speaker 1: a good dog. And yeah, they will understand the voice
• 13:45
  Speaker 1: more than, yeah, you're right. They understand the tone, not
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: the actual content.
• 13:50
  Speaker 4: But just for the get-go, the fact that he understood
• 13:54
  Speaker 4: that they were calling him ugly in the first place
• 13:55
  Speaker 4: is just stupid.
• 13:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean. He can't understand English. Yeah, dogs, we
• 14:01
  Speaker 1: adore them. Not that bright. If there's a whole audience
• 14:05
  Speaker 1: of people going, ha, ha, ha, ha, they'll be like, hey,
• 14:07
  Speaker 1: we're all having a great time.
• 14:08
  Speaker 4: Remember when Bart's dog gets an F and the only
• 14:10
  Speaker 4: word he understood was sit? It was like he understood
• 14:13
  Speaker 4: basic commands.
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: Correct. Not fluent English. Yeah, so this is not even
• 14:18
  Speaker 1: a C plot. It's more just like some stuff that happened.
• 14:22
  Speaker 1: And there's going to be people sitting there saying, it's
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: just a cartoon. What are you getting so upset about?
• 14:24
  Speaker 4: Well, I'm not getting upset, but let's just think about
• 14:26
  Speaker 4: it for a second. They've entered the dog into an
• 14:28
  Speaker 4: ugly dog contest and Mo says something like.
• 14:31
  Speaker 1: I wouldn't even....
• 14:34
  Speaker 4: Koreans wouldn't even touch this or something like that. The
• 14:37
  Speaker 4: Japanese wouldn't even touch this. And he's like, oh, he
• 14:41
  Speaker 4: thinks I'm ugly. I'm like, we're giving the dog subtitles now?
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: What are we doing? Yeah, what's happening here? Yeah. We're
• 14:48
  Speaker 1: not upset. We're just disappointed, as your parents often say. Hey,
• 14:52
  Speaker 1: my favorite. Did you have any favorite moments from the episode, though? Surprisingly,
• 14:56
  Speaker 1: I did. Yeah, a little more green on my list
• 14:58
  Speaker 1: than I thought there would be. I did like when
• 15:04
  Speaker 1: Mo gets approached by, I think it's the producer. Yeah.
• 15:07
  Speaker 1: The guy at Fox or whatever. I'm from TV. TV, huh?
• 15:11
  Speaker 1: That crap's still on. Yeah. Pretty funny. The list of names,
• 15:16
  Speaker 1: mostly forgettable. What is it called? Fix Andy Dick. You
• 15:19
  Speaker 1: know how- About time. Yeah. Yeah, it's about time. You
• 15:22
  Speaker 1: know how we feel about Andy Dick at this podcast.
• 15:24
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 15:24
  Speaker 1: Shout out to John Lovitz. Yeah. I've heard mixed reports
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: here that slapped him, slammed his head into a bar. Yeah.
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: I like slammed his head into a bar. That just- Kabam!
• 15:33
  Speaker 1: Heath Ledger style on the Joker. Not Joker. What was it?
• 15:36
  Speaker 1: He was a Joker. He was a Joker in the
• 15:37
  Speaker 1: Dark Knight. Want to see a magic trick? Thought that
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: was not a bad Joker on my part. That was
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: pretty good. One of your better ones. Thank you. One
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: of these days when I'd say, I thought that was
• 15:48
  Speaker 1: pretty good, it'd be like... He's going to floor me.
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: Absolute cinema. But we're very pro-Lovitz in this dojo, but
• 15:57
  Speaker 1: you wouldn't necessarily think of him as a badass, but
• 16:00
  Speaker 1: if he grabs... He grabbed Eddie Dick's head and just
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: slammed into him. I was like, Lovitz.
• 16:04
  Speaker 4: See, if I'm envisioning John Lovitz slapping somebody, I showed
• 16:07
  Speaker 4: Mitch this video on a recent podcast where he's in
• 16:09
  Speaker 4: a video where the guy kisses the back of his
• 16:11
  Speaker 4: hand and then bitch slaps the guy and knocks him out.
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: Have you seen that? You have shown me this.
• 16:14
  Speaker 4: That's like the ultimate slap. That's how John Lovitz would
• 16:16
  Speaker 4: slap someone out, I think. Imagine if it was a
• 16:17
  Speaker 4: video of John Lovitz going- And bitch.
• 16:20
  Speaker 1: Slapping Andy Dick. Slap. Slap. Andy Dick, your time to
• 16:27
  Speaker 1: get slapped. That would be the most washed video of
• 16:31
  Speaker 1: all time, I think. Fantastic. These are all more related,
• 16:34
  Speaker 1: I've got to say. But when he shows up in
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: Hollywood and he's like, I can't believe I'm finally here
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: in Hollywood. And they've got a Flint publication. Larry Flint's building,
• 16:43
  Speaker 1: the home of Hustler. I thought that was kind of funny.
• 16:45
  Speaker 1: I liked Homer being annoyed by the washing machine. They
• 16:47
  Speaker 1: want parts and labour. Pick one, buddy. Is that a
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: line that's been used before? I don't know, but it
• 16:52
  Speaker 1: should have been because it's funny. A good joke is
• 16:54
  Speaker 1: worth reading.
• 16:55
  Speaker 4: Because it's like, yeah, you're a hustler. It's like, do
• 16:58
  Speaker 4: you want me to fix it with the parts? Labour
• 17:00
  Speaker 4: is required to put the parts in to fix it.
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: Pick one, buddy. Pick one. And also... Yeah, Mo's line about,
• 17:09
  Speaker 1: you're doing great. I mean, I'm guessing that, you know,
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: you throw your paper plates out after one use, you
• 17:13
  Speaker 1: don't wait until the food falls through. Who among us? So, yeah,
• 17:20
  Speaker 1: those were my favourite moments.
• 17:22
  Speaker 4: It's funny, the reason I say about the Parson Lab
• 17:24
  Speaker 4: is because I know a lot of guys who are
• 17:26
  Speaker 4: tradies and whatnot. They always say to me, I always,
• 17:29
  Speaker 4: when I'm doing cashies, I always charge under $ 5, 000. Because
• 17:32
  Speaker 4: once you get over $ 5, 000, that's when people start asking.
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: What's all this for?
• 17:35
  Speaker 4: It's like, if it's under $ 5, 000, then it's like, eh,
• 17:37
  Speaker 4: it's not too bad. Over $ 5, 000, then it's suddenly going,
• 17:39
  Speaker 4: but what parts.
• 17:40
  Speaker 1: Are you buying? Itemized, please. Itemized receipt, please. It's like,
• 17:45
  Speaker 1: always keep it under $ 5, 000. Which you should do anyway,
• 17:48
  Speaker 1: in all honesty. Anytime you get a tradie and all,
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: it's like, how about an itemized receipt, please? Which I
• 17:55
  Speaker 1: would look through and go, Seems legit. It's like, I've
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: got no fucking idea. Next question. You there, eating the paste.
• 18:05
  Speaker 1: Trivia time.
• 18:06
  Speaker 4: My first question for you. What were the various stalls
• 18:08
  Speaker 4: at the pet event?
• 18:10
  Speaker 1: Oh, man. Yeah, I'm sorry. I should have been taking notes.
• 18:12
  Speaker 4: You mean you didn't take a lot of time when
• 18:14
  Speaker 4: they had no dialogue to actually read the signs that
• 18:15
  Speaker 4: they asked you to?
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: Oh, well, I.
• 18:17
  Speaker 4: It was get your pet skunk destriped.
• 18:20
  Speaker 1: Oh, that's right. Socialize your hermit crab. Whack a real mole.
• 18:23
  Speaker 1: Whack a real mole, correct. Ant farm, foreclosure sale. Yes.
• 18:27
  Speaker 4: Ant Farm is something I've never... I've always been intrigued
• 18:29
  Speaker 4: by the idea of having one. I never bothered to
• 18:31
  Speaker 4: have one, but I'm like, I feel like it's something
• 18:33
  Speaker 4: pretty easy to maintain.
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: I get the... Yeah. And interesting, just to watch them go. Sure.
• 18:39
  Speaker 1: I think I might have been burned by comic books
• 18:41
  Speaker 1: back in the day with the whole sea monkeys thing
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: as well. It's like, oh, they're like little creatures creating
• 18:48
  Speaker 1: a magical kingdom under the sea. It's like, these are...
• 18:52
  Speaker 1: I'm like, is it Stan or Kyle in South Park?
• 18:55
  Speaker 1: Brian Shrimp. Yeah. And I've got a feeling an ant
• 18:58
  Speaker 1: farm would just be like, someone actually got me one.
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: An ant farm? Yeah, for like my sixth or seventh
• 19:03
  Speaker 1: birthday or something. And I was kind of like, the
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: fuck is this? I wanted Micronauts. Where's my Tamagotchi? What
• 19:14
  Speaker 1: was it? It was Game and something, wasn't it? Game
• 19:16
  Speaker 1: and Watch? Game and Watch, yeah. No, but that was...
• 19:18
  Speaker 1: That was top tier. Oh, that was when I was like,
• 19:20
  Speaker 1: you know, 12 or 13. Where's my BB gun? I
• 19:26
  Speaker 1: don't know. Micronauts. I wanted Micronauts. But yeah, someone got
• 19:30
  Speaker 1: me an iPhone. Yeah, you're right. I do agree with you.
• 19:33
  Speaker 1: I like the, I wish I had the patience or something.
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: I was like sitting watching. Wow, look at them go.
• 19:38
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 19:38
  Speaker 1: Ants are interesting. They are interesting. They are very interesting. Yeah.
• 19:42
  Speaker 1: Also had Mongoose versus Cobra. That's right. That was actually
• 19:46
  Speaker 1: pretty funny. And Teenage Choice chimp diapers. And we get
• 19:49
  Speaker 1: a really stupid... scene. We'll get into that when we
• 19:51
  Speaker 1: do the review though. Indeed. Well, speaking of that, what
• 19:54
  Speaker 1: flavour is the Chimp Diaper? Not chocolate? No. It's got
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: a nutty cinnamon flavour. Nutty cinnamon flavour. Okay. I feel
• 20:02
  Speaker 1: like it could have made a chocolate shit gag there somewhere.
• 20:05
  Speaker 1: The Simpsons is better than that. That's not chocolate. There's
• 20:09
  Speaker 1: no chocolate. It isn't chocolate.
• 20:12
  Speaker 4: So what was Marge reading when Homer has the book? Oh,
• 20:18
  Speaker 4: what was after the title page?
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: It's Bob Dole's autobiography? Memoirs, yeah. Memoirs, yeah. This is
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: from the very start of the episode. Who sponsored the
• 20:28
  Speaker 1: Ugly Dog Contest? It has no sponsor. That's correct. Sponsorship
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: still available. And which show does Moe love? when he's
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: listing all the shows, he's like, well, I love that show. Oh, damn.
• 20:39
  Speaker 1: It's love. Let's make a veal. Let's make a veal.
• 20:42
  Speaker 1: That's right. Some of these names are not bad. Yeah,
• 20:46
  Speaker 1: I know.
• 20:48
  Speaker 4: The thing is, in the classic era, even like five,
• 20:51
  Speaker 4: six seasons ago, he would have been walking through the
• 20:53
  Speaker 4: studios of Fox and the posters on the wall whilst
• 20:56
  Speaker 4: they're having a conversation.
• 20:57
  Speaker 1: Let's make a veal. And you've got an adorable baby
• 21:01
  Speaker 1: cow running from someone with a knife. Yeah, yeah. Now,
• 21:03
  Speaker 1: it's just- Let's list it. Let's just list it because
• 21:06
  Speaker 1: we can't bother writing dialogue. Indeed. Yeah. I have two
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: more questions for you. Shall I just pick one? Pick one. Okay.
• 21:15
  Speaker 1: Mo judges a bully contest.
• 21:16
  Speaker 5: Who won?
• 21:17
  Speaker 1: Ooh. I'm going to say Dolph. It was Jimbo. Jimbo.
• 21:20
  Speaker 1: We do. We do. We do.
• 21:30
  Speaker 4: So that is our trivia, which means it's now time
• 21:31
  Speaker 4: for stone-cutter shout-outs.
• 21:33
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah. Starting with the lovely Katie G. Do you
• 21:35
  Speaker 1: reckon she enjoys a good veal meal or is she vegetarian?
• 21:38
  Speaker 1: I'm not too sure. Vegan, vegetarian? Do you think they
• 21:41
  Speaker 1: make vegan or vegetarian tenders? They'd have to. Or they'd
• 21:44
  Speaker 1: be made of, what's the- Zucchini? Yeah, but what's the
• 21:49
  Speaker 1: fake meat? Oh, feet? Fun fact. No, that never happened.
• 22:00
  Speaker 1: What do we call our fake meat? Feet. You're fired. F-E-A-T.
• 22:11
  Speaker 1: What a feet. We can do this for a while.
• 22:18
  Speaker 1: Let's not. The modern version of spam. Right in if
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: you think we should do more feet games. Katie Jean Tenders.
• 22:32
  Speaker 1: Katie Jean is vegan, right? I have no idea. Katie,
• 22:36
  Speaker 1: let us know. Drop us a DM.
• 22:39
  Speaker 4: Also, the following people are also stonecutters here at Four
• 22:41
  Speaker 4: Finger Discount. We've got Glenn Gomez, Justin Parker, Zach Pruitt,
• 22:45
  Speaker 4: Shani Macker, Elliot J. O'Neill, Isabella Murphy, Rach Beasley, Stephen Roberts,
• 22:50
  Speaker 4: Sean Davey, Pete Anderson, Timothy Burleson, Andrew Davis, Kevin Dental
• 22:53
  Speaker 4: Plan Flood, Bella Winderbank, Jack McFadden, Heath Appleby, Adria McLeod,
• 22:58
  Speaker 4: Mark Treleven, Ginger M. Pickle, Preston Murray, Talia Enriquez, Declan Phoenix,
• 23:03
  Speaker 4: Brian McCoy, Logan B, James Shepard, Joe Riedenseck, Dave Pretzels McNally,
• 23:08
  Speaker 4: Gavin Lang, Demi Miller, Charlie Joe, Abigail B Sharp Carter,
• 23:12
  Speaker 4: and Craig Alty Smash Gloster. All those people would enjoy
• 23:15
  Speaker 4: a good can of feet, I think.
• 23:19
  Speaker 1: Can feet. Put your feet on the table. Yeah. Fucking
• 23:27
  Speaker 1: Don Draper over here. Let's make this. You make a
• 23:33
  Speaker 1: whole dumbass movie about, you know, a couple of young
• 23:37
  Speaker 1: hustlers like, how do we get the Australian dream? It's like, oh,
• 23:41
  Speaker 1: food's getting harder and harder to sort of come by
• 23:42
  Speaker 1: these days. You know, the cost of living's going up.
• 23:44
  Speaker 1: We're going to make feet meat. We'll call it feet.
• 23:46
  Speaker 1: And the movie's just called Feet. Yeah. Ed Cavill, get
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: on the line. It would be all about it. If
• 23:56
  Speaker 1: you're looking for that food alternative, the meat alternative. You're
• 23:58
  Speaker 1: an Australian pie, mate.
• 24:00
  Speaker 4: Are you tired of your mum saying, get your feet
• 24:01
  Speaker 4: off the table? But what is the fake meat that
• 24:07
  Speaker 4: you see in stews and stuff?
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: I know what you're talking about. It's in cubes. What
• 24:12
  Speaker 1: the fuck's it called? I don't know if it's... Like tofu? Tofu!
• 24:16
  Speaker 1: That's not a fake food. That's soy curd or something.
• 24:19
  Speaker 1: But people use it as an alternative for meat, though. Oh,
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: as an alternative. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But there is stuff. Like,
• 24:24
  Speaker 1: you go to the supermarket, and there'll be a thing of, like,
• 24:26
  Speaker 1: plant-based protein. Yeah, yeah. Like, they used to be called
• 24:29
  Speaker 1: the Impossible Burger or something. Okay. Yeah, something like that.
• 24:32
  Speaker 1: I remember Hungry Jack's created a vegan burger. They tried
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: for a while. And I looked at it, and I'm like,
• 24:38
  Speaker 1: this is worse for me than a Whopper. Yeah. As
• 24:42
  Speaker 1: per our previous episode, the burgers were not better than
• 24:45
  Speaker 1: Hungry Jack's. Oh, man. Anyway. Next question? Feet. Your first question. No, no,
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: we're done. Oh, we're done. We did trivia. Yeah, that
• 24:56
  Speaker 1: was ours. Dude, we did trivia. Yeah, we're done. It's
• 24:58
  Speaker 1: time to go. Shouts and everything. It's time to talk
• 25:02
  Speaker 1: about the episode, man. Sorry.
• 25:03
  Speaker 4: The episode originally aired May 23rd, 2010. Top three films
• 25:05
  Speaker 4: at the box office. Number three, we have Robin Hood
• 25:07
  Speaker 4: down for number two. Iron Man 2 down for number one.
• 25:10
  Speaker 4: And Shrek Forever After, number one at the box office.
• 25:12
  Speaker 1: Oh, boy. We're getting Shrek 5 next year, aren't we?
• 25:14
  Speaker 1: We are indeed, yes.
• 25:15
  Speaker 4: And so it's been 16 years, 17 years by the
• 25:17
  Speaker 4: time it comes out. I can't believe it's been that long.
• 25:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Shrek Forever After is that film. It's the one
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: that we just forget about. You don't even talk about it.
• 25:25
  Speaker 1: Is that the one where Shrek gets de-Shrek'd?
• 25:28
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it's like everyone forgets who he is and he
• 25:30
  Speaker 4: goes to a different alternate universe.
• 25:32
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but he becomes like a dude. He doesn't become... No, no, no.
• 25:34
  Speaker 1: That's Shrek 2. That's a good one. Shrek 2 is good.
• 25:38
  Speaker 1: Is it? Where the chick from Ab Fab is the
• 25:40
  Speaker 1: fairy godmother and she turns him into- Oh, she turns
• 25:41
  Speaker 1: Shrek into- That's Shrek 2. That's a good movie. That's good. Oh, yeah.
• 25:44
  Speaker 1: Another one with Shrek 2. Shrek 3 is when he
• 25:45
  Speaker 1: has these kids and whatnot. Yeah. Timberlake in that one?
• 25:48
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it's where he's Prince Charming. And Shrek 4 is
• 25:50
  Speaker 4: where he wishes- He's sick of being Shrek. Everyone's like,
• 25:54
  Speaker 4: be an ogre, be an ogre. And he's sick of
• 25:57
  Speaker 4: being an ogre, so he asks to have a different life.
• 25:59
  Speaker 4: And then I think it's Merlin. Okay, so it's basically- No,
• 26:02
  Speaker 4: Rumpelstiltskin's the.
• 26:03
  Speaker 1: Villain in that one, I think. I don't know. It's terrible.
• 26:05
  Speaker 1: They all bleed into one. So it's basically the Spider-Man
• 26:07
  Speaker 1: brand new day of the Shrek franchise. Is it? Okay.
• 26:10
  Speaker 1: I don't know anything about brand new day. All I
• 26:13
  Speaker 1: know is that no one remembers Peter Parker anymore. I
• 26:15
  Speaker 1: just know that the guy who did the score, the
• 26:18
  Speaker 1: song for the movie, leaked who What's-Her-Face was from Stranger Things. Oh, yeah.
• 26:23
  Speaker 1: On the red carpet. Yeah, the guy named Steve Lacey,
• 26:26
  Speaker 1: who I've never heard of.
• 26:27
  Speaker 4: Yeah, he just, basically, everything that Kate underwraps for the
• 26:29
  Speaker 4: entire time, he's just like, yeah, yeah, and this is
• 26:31
  Speaker 4: what happens.
• 26:32
  Speaker 1: And everyone's like, um. Are you seeing this more and more, though? Yeah,
• 26:36
  Speaker 1: leaking stuff. Yeah, but people are also just being unafraid
• 26:38
  Speaker 1: to film shit in the cinema and then put it online.
• 26:41
  Speaker 1: Not the whole movie, sometimes the whole movie, but like,
• 26:45
  Speaker 1: I'll be going through my Twitter feed and it's like,
• 26:47
  Speaker 1: This is the end of the Odyssey. I haven't seen
• 26:48
  Speaker 1: it yet. Yeah, I've seen the- Yeah, I know it
• 26:51
  Speaker 1: happens in the end of the Odyssey, but at the
• 26:52
  Speaker 1: same time. The end of Disclosure Day was online within
• 26:55
  Speaker 1: like a day. What? Yeah. I don't approve.
• 26:58
  Speaker 4: I re-watched Disclosure Day. I was like, I didn't enjoy
• 27:00
  Speaker 4: it as much as the first time I watched it.
• 27:01
  Speaker 4: I thought I'd enjoy it more. Can I do a
• 27:03
  Speaker 4: little cross promo?
• 27:05
  Speaker 1: I occasionally do a podcast with Charlie Clawson, and we
• 27:08
  Speaker 1: recently did a four-part series about the sci-fi movies of
• 27:11
  Speaker 1: Steven Spielberg. The last episode just dropped a little while ago,
• 27:14
  Speaker 1: and we talked about Disclosure Day. and ranked our Steven
• 27:17
  Speaker 1: Spielberg sci-fi favorites. And I think our thoughts on Disclosure
• 27:21
  Speaker 1: Day were pretty similar. It's kind of like, I'm not
• 27:22
  Speaker 1: in a hurry to revisit this. Anyway.
• 27:25
  Speaker 4: I skipped straight to the end. I was like, the
• 27:28
  Speaker 4: end was the most memorable part for me. I won't
• 27:29
  Speaker 4: say what happens, but I rewatched the end and I went,
• 27:32
  Speaker 4: it hit me more when I was in the cinema.
• 27:33
  Speaker 4: This doesn't feel as important. Maybe because I haven't spent
• 27:35
  Speaker 4: two hours building up to the moment.
• 27:36
  Speaker 1: Quite possibly. Maybe because I knew what was coming this time.
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: But anyway, yeah, there you go. Yeah. Um, Shrek Forever After.
• 27:44
  Speaker 1: Apparently it's number one for like three or four straight weeks. Okay, then, well,
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: you know, does the world still have Shrek fever? We'll
• 27:49
  Speaker 1: find out in a year from now.
• 27:51
  Speaker 4: I'm surprised we didn't have more Shreks in this last
• 27:54
  Speaker 4: 17 years. Like, did this movie just not do.
• 27:56
  Speaker 1: Well at the box office? Shrek Forever After. I get
• 27:59
  Speaker 1: the feeling it probably would have done well, but sometimes
• 28:01
  Speaker 1: you can just tell. $ 135 million budget, $ 756 million at
• 28:05
  Speaker 1: the box office. How are they not a Shrek 5 already? Crazy, right?
• 28:09
  Speaker 1: People will go to see it, but there'll just be
• 28:12
  Speaker 1: a vibe of like, we don't need any more of
• 28:15
  Speaker 1: these for a while. We also got Puss in Boots
• 28:16
  Speaker 1: as a result of this, after this. Yeah, man. Which
• 28:18
  Speaker 1: are good movies. Puss in Boots is great. Yeah.
• 28:21
  Speaker 3: Puss in Boots.
• 28:23
  Speaker 1: I'm contractually obliged to do that every time we mention it.
• 28:26
  Speaker 1: That's the bad guy there. Okay, then. Who's playing him?
• 28:29
  Speaker 1: Is it Cleese? It would be... Oh, no, because he's like...
• 28:34
  Speaker 1: He's the dad. Fiona's father. Who's... I don't know who
• 28:38
  Speaker 1: that guy is. Oh, is he the guy from Only
• 28:42
  Speaker 1: Murder in a Building? It looks like him, but I
• 28:44
  Speaker 1: don't think it is. The really weird guy? No, because
• 28:48
  Speaker 1: that guy's got a different name. I'm guessing this guy's
• 28:50
  Speaker 1: more a voice actor than anything else. He did Rumpelstiltskin.
• 28:54
  Speaker 1: Co-directed what? Did he co-direct?
• 28:57
  Speaker 4: He played Rumpelstiltskin, yeah.
• 29:00
  Speaker 1: Interesting.
• 29:01
  Speaker 4: I don't think I've ever watched from start to finish.
• 29:03
  Speaker 4: The kids can't get through it. They're just like, this
• 29:04
  Speaker 4: is shit.
• 29:08
  Speaker 1: There's a shit. There's a shit house.
• 29:12
  Speaker 4: But as I was saying, the original edit of this episode,
• 29:13
  Speaker 4: May 23rd, 2010, production code MABF15, written by Dan Graney
• 29:18
  Speaker 4: and Alan Grazier and directed by Stephen Dean Moore.
• 29:22
  Speaker 1: Billboard gag. Billboard. Opening caption gag first. Opening caption gag.
• 29:25
  Speaker 1: Flanders is an angel. The billboard is, Krusty's one year
• 29:29
  Speaker 1: sobriety special has been cancelled. Now, this shortboard gag is,
• 29:33
  Speaker 1: end of lost. It was all the dog's dream. Watch us.
• 29:35
  Speaker 4: Because apparently that was at the same time as this episode.
• 29:39
  Speaker 1: Right. Or at the same time. The couch gag.
• 29:41
  Speaker 4: Bart and Homer play a puppet show. Versions of themselves
• 29:43
  Speaker 4: fighting in front of the couch. Bart hits Homer and
• 29:45
  Speaker 4: gets angry and starts choking him.
• 29:46
  Speaker 1: It's Punch and Judy. Which is Punch and Judy. What
• 29:48
  Speaker 1: is Punch and Judy? It's like your age-old sort of
• 29:51
  Speaker 1: puppet show, which is basically... I think it's about an
• 29:55
  Speaker 1: abusive husband. It seems that way, yeah. Punching his wife, Judy.
• 29:58
  Speaker 1: His name's Punch. It's like, Judy, you should have known
• 30:02
  Speaker 1: what you were getting into. Not to victim blame here.
• 30:04
  Speaker 1: You shouldn't have mouthed that like that. You married a
• 30:08
  Speaker 1: guy called Punch, you shouldn't have mouthed that. Oh.
• 30:15
  Speaker 4: I've just started watching Goodfellas the other day, Casino, and
• 30:18
  Speaker 4: I'm going to start watching Sopranos.
• 30:19
  Speaker 1: I'm watching Goodfellas. I'm like, this is the cast of Sopranos. Oh,
• 30:23
  Speaker 1: my goodness, yes. Holy shit. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I think,
• 30:26
  Speaker 1: I don't know if it was David Chase or Gandolfini
• 30:28
  Speaker 1: who said it. It was like, yeah, this is the
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: first sort of gangster story that's about guys who grew
• 30:35
  Speaker 1: up on Goodfellas and The Godfather. So that's why all
• 30:37
  Speaker 1: that stuff is in there as well. But yeah, but
• 30:39
  Speaker 1: there's so many cast members from that. Michael, everyone. Oh, yeah.
• 30:42
  Speaker 1: Joe Pesci is an absolute... motherfucker in that movie.
• 30:45
  Speaker 2: Tommy?
• 30:46
  Speaker 1: Tommy? Is he Tommy DeVito? Yeah, yeah. So terrifying. Just
• 30:50
  Speaker 1: scary man. Oh, God. See how funny? You're like, oh, shit. Yeah,
• 30:54
  Speaker 1: and apparently Scorsese directed him to say, yeah, Ray Liotta
• 31:00
  Speaker 1: was not expecting that. Oh, really? Yeah. And Pesci just
• 31:04
  Speaker 1: sort of ran with it. Funny how, what the? He
• 31:06
  Speaker 1: wasn't sure what he was saying. He runs out of breath. Yeah. No,
• 31:09
  Speaker 1: tell me how, what the fuck is so funny about me? Yeah,
• 31:12
  Speaker 1: it's like, Fucking hell, Tommy. Kudos to Ray for going
• 31:15
  Speaker 1: with it, though. Ray Liotta. God, I miss that guy.
• 31:18
  Speaker 1: He was so good. But just that whole kind of... Yeah.
• 31:21
  Speaker 1: That laugh.
• 31:23
  Speaker 5: Ray.
• 31:26
  Speaker 1: Rest in peace, brother. Yeah, Goodfellas. Great movie. I love
• 31:30
  Speaker 1: the psychiatrist. Is his wife in it? Yeah, yeah. Oh,
• 31:34
  Speaker 1: poor old spider. Yeah, I know. And that's Maltesanti? Yeah. Yeah. Even...
• 31:39
  Speaker 1: His main side guy, what's his name? Paulie. Paulie's in
• 31:43
  Speaker 1: it as well, briefly at the start. Oh, yeah, yeah. Oh,
• 31:45
  Speaker 1: my goodness. I'm going to have to watch Goodfellas. Not
• 31:48
  Speaker 1: Paulie the character, but the guy who plays Paulie. No, no,
• 31:50
  Speaker 1: not Paulie Cicero. Yeah, yeah. I love that. I love
• 31:52
  Speaker 1: that he's like, I'm going to turn my back now.
• 31:53
  Speaker 4: And you're like, oh, cold-blooded. But he gets the upper
• 31:58
  Speaker 4: hand at the end, though. That's when I knew I
• 32:01
  Speaker 4: would not be returning to it.
• 32:03
  Speaker 1: But that whole bit at the end just where he's
• 32:04
  Speaker 1: in court and he starts talking to the camera. And
• 32:06
  Speaker 1: now it's all over. Yeah. Oh, have we done a
• 32:11
  Speaker 1: Goodfellas movie? No. Okay, I'm contacting multiple. Leonard, we're doing
• 32:16
  Speaker 1: Goodfellas next. I'm not asking, I'm telling. Yeah. I put
• 32:21
  Speaker 1: it on. I was like, I'll watch a bit of
• 32:22
  Speaker 1: it now and I'll watch the rest tomorrow. And I
• 32:23
  Speaker 1: was like, oh, I'll just watch the whole movie. I
• 32:25
  Speaker 1: knew I went from rags to riches. I don't know
• 32:26
  Speaker 1: if all this is going to be in there. And
• 32:28
  Speaker 1: the soundtrack is unbelievable. It's so good. It's so good.
• 32:32
  Speaker 1: And now we get to Judge Me Tender. And you
• 32:36
  Speaker 1: will soon realize why we spend a whole bunch of
• 32:38
  Speaker 1: time talking about Goodfellas.
• 32:39
  Speaker 4: So Judge Me Tender, it kicks off with Homer and Bart,
• 32:42
  Speaker 4: those larrikins, and they're trying to make Santa's little help
• 32:45
  Speaker 4: out of turning him into Satan's little help, and they're
• 32:47
  Speaker 4: making him really ugly.
• 32:48
  Speaker 1: Trying to uglify that dog. Yeah, for the ugly dog contest.
• 32:51
  Speaker 1: These things must exist, ugly dog contests. Oh, yeah, they do. Yeah, absolutely.
• 32:54
  Speaker 1: I mean, and they're usually, the winner is usually some
• 32:58
  Speaker 1: dog that's kind of deformed or, you know, or it's
• 33:00
  Speaker 1: a- Usually the overbite or underbite or whatever it is, yeah. Yeah,
• 33:03
  Speaker 1: the tongue is usually drooping out one side, and they're-
• 33:07
  Speaker 1: Their fur is always patchy. And they're usually little dogs
• 33:10
  Speaker 1: as well.
• 33:11
  Speaker 4: The thing is with little dogs, right, like little terriers
• 33:13
  Speaker 4: and things that have the long hair, I've got friends
• 33:17
  Speaker 4: who have them and they come for cuddles and stuff
• 33:19
  Speaker 4: and I'm like, Your mouth is gross because all the
• 33:22
  Speaker 4: food's caught in the gravy and the food's all in there.
• 33:23
  Speaker 1: And I'm like, do you bathe your dogs? Yeah, wash
• 33:26
  Speaker 1: your dog. Why is this? It's disgusting. I don't want
• 33:29
  Speaker 1: this thing near me. And the dog's probably the sweetest
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: disposition and all that kind of stuff. But at the
• 33:35
  Speaker 1: same time, clean up that dog.
• 33:37
  Speaker 4: If a family or someone walked up to you, if
• 33:39
  Speaker 4: someone walked up to you with a beard and the
• 33:41
  Speaker 4: beard was full of gravy from chips and gravy and
• 33:43
  Speaker 4: a chicken schnitzel or something.
• 33:44
  Speaker 1: What are you trying to say, Dana? Their face was
• 33:47
  Speaker 1: covered in just- Yes. Grossness. Gross shit. Would you want
• 33:50
  Speaker 1: to go near that person? You would not. No. No.
• 33:53
  Speaker 1: Or even like, yeah. And I love dogs. Check out
• 33:56
  Speaker 1: the baby. It's like, wipe that baby. So this is
• 33:59
  Speaker 1: the thing. That baby took a shit. Is there something as,
• 34:03
  Speaker 1: is there ugly baby contests? Would anyone ever have the
• 34:08
  Speaker 1: balls to enter their baby? Because I said to Nicola
• 34:11
  Speaker 1: the other day, we're looking at some babies and stuff.
• 34:12
  Speaker 1: And I was like, I get babies are cute. They're adorable.
• 34:14
  Speaker 1: They're adorable. But they're also kind of ugly. Some babies
• 34:17
  Speaker 1: are ugly. All babies look like Winston Churchill. Yes.
• 34:20
  Speaker 4: I'm just looking at photos of these babies of friends
• 34:22
  Speaker 4: of ours. And I was like, I guess it's cute,
• 34:25
  Speaker 4: but it's also just, it's a baby.
• 34:27
  Speaker 1: Seinfeld did that whole episode.
• 34:28
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: Gotta see the baby. So the thing is, I wonder
• 34:33
  Speaker 1: if there's people out there who have the balls to go,
• 34:35
  Speaker 1: you know what? My baby's ugly. Let's try and make
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: some money out of this. Yeah. I don't think you
• 34:39
  Speaker 1: can monetize. That would be a bridge too far. But yeah,
• 34:43
  Speaker 1: just a copy of things like, World's most hideous baby contest. Oh,
• 34:48
  Speaker 1: my goodness. Where is this? It exists. They don't stay ugly,
• 34:53
  Speaker 1: so it's okay to poke fun at them. That's what
• 34:54
  Speaker 1: the slogan is. I kind of like this. I do, too.
• 34:59
  Speaker 1: Got to respect the hustle. All right. Have we got footage? Well,
• 35:02
  Speaker 1: we've got a Reddit thread of ugly babies. Yeah, let's
• 35:04
  Speaker 1: see it. Yeah, it's not too ugly. What? That's AI.
• 35:08
  Speaker 1: That's perfectly fine-looking babies. Yeah, it's kind of ugly.
• 35:11
  Speaker 2: Oh, man.
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: That's not a baby. None of these babies are ugly.
• 35:14
  Speaker 1: That's an ugly baby. Look at the hands. What the hell? Well,
• 35:16
  Speaker 1: that's newborn. Yeah, still. That baby looks like it's just
• 35:21
  Speaker 1: seen an ugly baby. These aren't that ugly. None of
• 35:26
  Speaker 1: these babies are ugly. That one's kind of ugly. Well, yeah,
• 35:29
  Speaker 1: that's a Winston Churchill baby. That one's ugly. Okay. That's adorable.
• 35:37
  Speaker 1: It's a little monkey baby. That one's creepy. That can't
• 35:40
  Speaker 1: be real. It's got a full set of teeth. That's
• 35:41
  Speaker 1: not real. That's AI, surely. It's got a full set
• 35:44
  Speaker 1: of teeth. That's got adult teeth. That's AI, slop. It's unsettling.
• 35:48
  Speaker 1: And it's an ugly baby. But it's also... It's just
• 35:54
  Speaker 1: pulling an ugly face, that one. That's correct. Have we
• 35:56
  Speaker 1: caught some of these babies at the worst time of
• 35:59
  Speaker 1: their day? Yeah. They may have just taken a dump
• 36:01
  Speaker 1: in their diaper. Oh, that one's kind of ugly. Well, yes.
• 36:05
  Speaker 1: Enough of ugly babies, I think. To quote Captain America. U-G-L-Y.
• 36:10
  Speaker 1: You ain't got no alibi, you ugly baby. To quote
• 36:13
  Speaker 1: Captain America, we could do this all day, but instead
• 36:15
  Speaker 1: we should talk about Judge Me Tender. But Homer just
• 36:17
  Speaker 1: wants something, you know, like a Bat Boy? What the
• 36:20
  Speaker 1: hell is that about? Are you not familiar with Bat Boy? No.
• 36:24
  Speaker 1: There was a tabloid, even a few runs low inside
• 36:28
  Speaker 1: the National Enquirer. And, yeah, they ran this obviously Photoshopped
• 36:33
  Speaker 1: image of, like, Bat Baby found or Bat Boy or
• 36:36
  Speaker 1: something like that. which was like a baby, an ugly baby,
• 36:39
  Speaker 1: but they put like bat ears on it. Oh, there
• 36:41
  Speaker 1: it is. Yeah, yeah. What is it? Bat Child Vanity Cave.
• 36:45
  Speaker 1: It's almost as good as Headless Body and Topless Bar. Yeah,
• 36:48
  Speaker 1: but Bat Child Vanity Cave. What is it? The Weekly
• 36:50
  Speaker 1: World News? Yeah. I think that's the... This is a
• 36:54
  Speaker 1: thing that actually existed. The child didn't know. Oh, no.
• 36:59
  Speaker 4: Beginning with a front page story, in 1992, the character
• 37:01
  Speaker 4: became a pop culture icon. See, I was too young,
• 37:04
  Speaker 4: so he's not an icon to me, but I love
• 37:05
  Speaker 4: that you're old enough to go, don't you remember Batboy?
• 37:09
  Speaker 1: It's a very generation X-E. We loved our freaks in
• 37:14
  Speaker 1: the 90s, like the Jim Rose Circus. I'm sure I've
• 37:17
  Speaker 1: talked about this in the past. Have you ever heard
• 37:18
  Speaker 1: of the Jim Rose Circus? Yeah, yeah. They parodied the
• 37:21
  Speaker 1: circus freaks on The Simpsons all the time. Yeah, yeah.
• 37:23
  Speaker 1: Of course, it was on The Simpsons. Yeah, yeah. It
• 37:26
  Speaker 1: came to Geelong. Some guy who had like a... a
• 37:31
  Speaker 1: ring in the eye of his old chap and would
• 37:33
  Speaker 1: like put weights on it. We're like, but also, yeah.
• 37:39
  Speaker 4: When I was a kid, the closest thing I remember
• 37:41
  Speaker 4: to that is.
• 37:42
  Speaker 1: Like puppetry of the penis. Oh yeah, yeah, there's that too.
• 37:44
  Speaker 4: And I was just like, I'm intrigued by this, but
• 37:47
  Speaker 4: also I'm looking at men's penises.
• 37:51
  Speaker 1: Among us. But yeah, there's also, I think he became
• 37:56
  Speaker 1: well-known by being on the, Cover of a Silverchair album,
• 38:00
  Speaker 1: but there was Lobster Boy. Ah, yeah. Yeah, with the
• 38:04
  Speaker 1: rather plump lad with the lobster hands. Lobster Boy. Which
• 38:08
  Speaker 1: album was Silverchair? Was it on? Was it on Freak Show? Oh, yeah. Yep.
• 38:12
  Speaker 1: It was just his head, though. I know.
• 38:14
  Speaker 4: It must be like the inside case has his lobster hands.
• 38:17
  Speaker 1: So Lobster Boy was a real kid. Grady Franklin Styles Jr. Yeah.
• 38:21
  Speaker 1: I didn't realize he was real. There you go. And
• 38:25
  Speaker 1: that's the end of that story. And that's the end
• 38:28
  Speaker 1: of that story. But, yeah, so he wants something like Batboy. Yes,
• 38:31
  Speaker 1: which freaks out Bart. Yes.
• 38:33
  Speaker 5: Not ugly enough. I want something that looks like this.
• 38:37
  Speaker 1: Like a rumba.
• 38:38
  Speaker 5: Had a baby with this, and it got sat on
• 38:41
  Speaker 5: by this.
• 38:42
  Speaker 1: I think I've come up with the answer. Oh, my God.
• 38:49
  Speaker 5: You never fail to nauseate me, boy.
• 38:52
  Speaker 1: Ha ha ha!
• 38:53
  Speaker 3: Just call me Barf Simpson.
• 38:56
  Speaker 5: I wanted to, but your mother said kids might tease you.
• 38:59
  Speaker 1: But yeah, so they turn Satan's little helper into Satan's
• 39:01
  Speaker 1: little helper. He's really ugly. I don't think we've seen
• 39:03
  Speaker 1: him finished yet, the finished part, until we get to
• 39:04
  Speaker 1: the end. But they do make the Barf Simpson joke, like,
• 39:06
  Speaker 1: I wanted to name you that, but you're Your mother
• 39:09
  Speaker 1: would let me. Kids make fun of you. I'm like,
• 39:12
  Speaker 1: they would. What's going on here? That's not funny. You're
• 39:17
  Speaker 1: like De Niro. Yeah, that's not funny.
• 39:22
  Speaker 4: Springfield Pet Fair time. And you get to meet the
• 39:24
  Speaker 4: stuffed dog from Frasier. The dog hadn't died, has it?
• 39:28
  Speaker 1: I don't think so. What was his name? Eddie? The
• 39:30
  Speaker 1: dog in Frasier? Yeah. Was the character... Are you completing
• 39:34
  Speaker 1: the character in the active? Was the dog named Moose
• 39:38
  Speaker 1: and the character's name was Eddie? Frasier ain't calling his
• 39:42
  Speaker 1: dog Moose. Kelsey Grammer did not like that dog.
• 39:44
  Speaker 3: Really?
• 39:44
  Speaker 1: Well, it was Martin's dog. It was the dad's dog, right? Yeah. Yeah.
• 39:47
  Speaker 1: He would have named it Moose. Frasier never would have.
• 39:50
  Speaker 1: He would have named it Voltaire or some shit like that. Yeah,
• 39:54
  Speaker 1: but apparently Kelsey Grammar did not get along with that
• 39:56
  Speaker 1: dog or did not like that dog. Or the dog
• 39:57
  Speaker 1: didn't like him? Maybe. He didn't like Kelsey Grammar. Some people.
• 40:01
  Speaker 1: Apparently so. Have to wake him up. You've got to
• 40:04
  Speaker 1: get them back to work, Kelsey. Listen to some of
• 40:07
  Speaker 1: our interviews and they'll tell you the whole story about
• 40:09
  Speaker 1: Kelsey Kramer's guest appearances on The Simpsons. Fun stuff. Who
• 40:13
  Speaker 1: was it that told us that story? Was it Jay? Yeah,
• 40:16
  Speaker 1: Jay Kogan. He was just like Kelsey Kramer. He was
• 40:18
  Speaker 1: passed out in his trailer. What a drunk. He was
• 40:20
  Speaker 1: passed out drunk. We had to wake him up. But
• 40:22
  Speaker 1: he came in and did the job. What a professional.
• 40:23
  Speaker 1: Sam Simon. I'm like, Sam Simon seems like such a
• 40:25
  Speaker 1: great guy. Piece of shit. Sometimes you would catch Sam
• 40:30
  Speaker 1: at a bad time. Yeah. I'm getting all the scoops
• 40:34
  Speaker 1: here on four-figure discount. You're looking at me?
• 40:35
  Speaker 4: You're talking to me? I was walking with Sam one day,
• 40:38
  Speaker 4: and one guy was like, did you see that guy
• 40:40
  Speaker 4: the way he looked at me? And James was like, no.
• 40:43
  Speaker 1: He just said, good morning, Sam. You're not having a
• 40:46
  Speaker 1: good morning. Well, that's your problem. Anyway. But then they- Oh,
• 40:51
  Speaker 1: you meet the stuffed dog. I don't know if he
• 40:53
  Speaker 1: was dead by that time.
• 40:53
  Speaker 4: They're somehow walking around. I think it's Homer walking around
• 40:56
  Speaker 4: with Sam's little help in a carrier.
• 40:58
  Speaker 1: It's a big dog. It is a big dog. Yeah.
• 40:59
  Speaker 1: The cat carrier. That's right. How's he in a carrier?
• 41:02
  Speaker 4: He's just walking around with him anyway. So they say,
• 41:05
  Speaker 4: you put more time into this than my schoolwork, or
• 41:08
  Speaker 4: Bart says, you put more time into this than the
• 41:10
  Speaker 4: schoolwork over the years, and you can win a gift certificate. Now,
• 41:14
  Speaker 4: I've got here, there's a music cue here that they
• 41:17
  Speaker 4: use when they arrive as a transition to get to
• 41:20
  Speaker 4: the fair.
• 41:21
  Speaker 1: And then like 15 seconds later, I timed it.
• 41:27
  Speaker 4: Homer makes a joke about the key certificate, blah, blah, blah,
• 41:28
  Speaker 4: and he goes, it's the exact same music cue. I thought,
• 41:32
  Speaker 4: that's got to be a mistake. They used the exact
• 41:35
  Speaker 4: same cue 15 seconds apart.
• 41:37
  Speaker 1: It was bizarre. That's odd. I think it was something
• 41:40
  Speaker 1: we've talked about as we're in these final episodes of
• 41:43
  Speaker 1: season 21. It's like, it's very much, that was the
• 41:45
  Speaker 1: end of school. It's just, you know. TV's out. TV's
• 41:49
  Speaker 1: out for summer. But at the same time, with an
• 41:53
  Speaker 1: animated show, one would expect that the same amount of
• 41:56
  Speaker 1: work has to go into, you know, it's not like
• 41:59
  Speaker 1: your actual last day of school where you can just
• 42:01
  Speaker 1: put your feet up on the desk and go, what
• 42:02
  Speaker 1: are you going to do, expel me? Yes, we could
• 42:04
  Speaker 1: do that. Yes. For them to do that, do, do, do, do, cue,
• 42:08
  Speaker 1: so it's like, I don't know, but yeah, it's lazy.
• 42:10
  Speaker 1: Not so much lazy, it's weird. It is weird.
• 42:13
  Speaker 4: It's where Dredrick Tatum walks up to Sideshow Mel's store
• 42:15
  Speaker 4: about the diapers and he wants diapers.
• 42:17
  Speaker 1: That his tiger can eat. It's weird. And then he
• 42:22
  Speaker 1: tries one. And then he takes a bite out of them.
• 42:23
  Speaker 1: It's a great time to be a tiger. And I
• 42:24
  Speaker 1: was like, what the hell? What is going on? What
• 42:27
  Speaker 1: are you even doing here? A nutty cinnamon flavor.
• 42:30
  Speaker 4: The Jesus fish and the natural selection here, the origin species.
• 42:34
  Speaker 1: Oh, that's right. The fish is almost trying to evolve.
• 42:37
  Speaker 1: Not on my watch. Not going to be proven that. No.
• 42:40
  Speaker 1: That was all right.
• 42:40
  Speaker 4: Now it's time for the contest. Nobody is letting Mo
• 42:43
  Speaker 4: sit next to him. Everyone's being rude and mean because
• 42:45
  Speaker 4: that's setting up the story here. They'll even set fire
• 42:48
  Speaker 4: to a chair.
• 42:49
  Speaker 1: Yep. So he has to sit on the dirt. And
• 42:51
  Speaker 1: then Krusty starts doing some stand-up, which Moe doesn't appreciate. Well,
• 42:54
  Speaker 1: he's just playing the hits. Yes. So he's not even
• 42:56
  Speaker 1: playing the hits. He's, yeah, just- Just puppy goo-goo reminds
• 42:59
  Speaker 1: me of his ex-wife. This one reminds me of Congress,
• 43:02
  Speaker 1: Natalie Driver, blah, blah, blah. So who's Bala Abzug, Doug?
• 43:07
  Speaker 1: That's a good question. I want to say that she
• 43:09
  Speaker 1: was- I actually looked it up. No, it's- Politician in
• 43:13
  Speaker 1: New York?
• 43:14
  Speaker 4: So, Battling Bella was her nickname, was an American lawyer, politician,
• 43:17
  Speaker 4: social activist, and a leader in the women's movement.
• 43:19
  Speaker 1: Okay, yeah, yeah. A female who Krusty does not appreciate. Well,
• 43:24
  Speaker 1: this was a time when- I think she was very
• 43:26
  Speaker 1: prominent in a time when feminism was coming up in society,
• 43:30
  Speaker 1: and- You know, she was a fairly sort of pugnacious
• 43:33
  Speaker 1: and forthright individual. So I think a lot of it
• 43:35
  Speaker 1: is like, why am I listening to this ugly broad
• 43:37
  Speaker 1: tell me about my rights? She can't tell me what
• 43:39
  Speaker 1: to do. Pretty much, yeah. It makes sense that Krusty
• 43:42
  Speaker 1: would not be a fan.
• 43:43
  Speaker 4: Moe then heckles Krusty, and then Krusty invites him onto
• 43:46
  Speaker 4: stage to entertain. And he's like, well, at least I
• 43:48
  Speaker 4: can get a chair, so I might do that. And
• 43:50
  Speaker 4: then they bring out Molman's dog, and he says, even
• 43:52
  Speaker 4: Peter said that they should kill this one. And then
• 43:54
  Speaker 4: we get Satan's little helper. This is where Moe says, even...
• 43:58
  Speaker 4: Koreans wouldn't touch this dog. And we get Santa's little
• 44:00
  Speaker 4: helper sad that he thinks he's ugly.
• 44:02
  Speaker 1: I think I'm ugly. And I was like, I'm buying this.
• 44:04
  Speaker 4: And we've already discussed it. It's a bit silly, but whatever.
• 44:08
  Speaker 4: I feel like these episodes here, they've got a story
• 44:11
  Speaker 4: and the B plots are getting weaker. The B plots
• 44:14
  Speaker 4: just feel like unnecessary. There's no story there. The whole
• 44:19
  Speaker 4: Santa's little helper is worried about his image.
• 44:21
  Speaker 1: It's a dog. Can we just be a dog? As
• 44:23
  Speaker 1: we said, not even really a B plot in this.
• 44:25
  Speaker 1: It's more like just a little, like a, A C-section,
• 44:28
  Speaker 1: so to speak. Yeah.
• 44:30
  Speaker 4: So Sands and Huppert wins, and merchants are coming to
• 44:32
  Speaker 4: congratulate them, but no, they- They want a piece of Moe.
• 44:34
  Speaker 1: They're cheering Moe. They want a piece of Moe. They
• 44:36
  Speaker 1: think he was hilarious. And it's because at the start,
• 44:38
  Speaker 1: when he was trying to get a chair, Lindsay Nagel
• 44:40
  Speaker 1: wouldn't let him sit next to her. Then Lindsay Nagel
• 44:42
  Speaker 1: removes the soy sauce that she put down there, and
• 44:45
  Speaker 1: he says, I don't need no fare with a friendship.
• 44:47
  Speaker 1: It's what I'll say tomorrow morning. He's going to have
• 44:49
  Speaker 1: one night with Lindsay Nagel. We're now at Moe's. Good
• 44:52
  Speaker 1: on you, Moe.
• 44:53
  Speaker 4: We're at Moe's, and the guy said, you did really
• 44:54
  Speaker 4: well doing what you do best, being mean to animals.
• 44:58
  Speaker 4: And then the crazy beer guy, the guy from the
• 45:00
  Speaker 4: crazy beer contest, he wants Moe to be the judge
• 45:02
  Speaker 4: for their contest. Moe says, well, I have to close
• 45:04
  Speaker 4: for the night if I'm going to do that. So
• 45:05
  Speaker 4: that's what's setting up what we would call the B plot.
• 45:07
  Speaker 1: Oh, that's right.
• 45:08
  Speaker 4: Of Homer not being able to go to Moe's because
• 45:09
  Speaker 4: Moe's is shutting it down. Not shutting the whole place down,
• 45:11
  Speaker 4: but it's closed all the time because he's judging these contests.
• 45:14
  Speaker 4: And then Homer says, well, I'm going to have to
• 45:16
  Speaker 4: go home and drink better beer at half price and
• 45:19
  Speaker 4: better lighting. Why would I want to do that? So
• 45:20
  Speaker 4: everyone's saying we won't leave. And Mo's like, well, I
• 45:22
  Speaker 4: didn't want to do this. And you think he's walking
• 45:23
  Speaker 4: over towards what?
• 45:24
  Speaker 1: A gun rack? Yeah. And you're like, this is getting dark.
• 45:26
  Speaker 1: I was like, oh boy. Well, it actually is getting dark.
• 45:28
  Speaker 1: He flicks the lights off and on. Hey, well done you.
• 45:30
  Speaker 1: And they don't like it. Yes. And they all run out.
• 45:33
  Speaker 1: Then Lisa arrives randomly to sell band candy. Yeah. It's
• 45:36
  Speaker 1: really just a setup for a little bit of what
• 45:39
  Speaker 1: our friend Nina would call a runner. Yeah. It's got
• 45:42
  Speaker 1: a little bit of a running gag throughout. It's almost
• 45:45
  Speaker 1: rule of threes. I think they do it three times.
• 45:47
  Speaker 1: Is it a runner though, this one? Well, it depends.
• 45:50
  Speaker 1: Because he has the thing later on where it's like, oh,
• 45:53
  Speaker 1: even in my thought balloon, Lisa's showing up and trying
• 45:55
  Speaker 1: to sell me band candy. Yeah, I guess. And then
• 45:58
  Speaker 1: she shows up. Does she show up in Simon Cowell's
• 46:00
  Speaker 1: thoughts or something? No, I don't think so. He never
• 46:02
  Speaker 1: met Lisa, so. No, but it would be like a
• 46:04
  Speaker 1: nice absurd game. It's like, wow, she even showed up
• 46:06
  Speaker 1: in Simon Cowell's.
• 46:07
  Speaker 4: But the way this ends, though, he's like, oh, the
• 46:09
  Speaker 4: lighting doesn't work on you or whatever. And then she says,
• 46:13
  Speaker 4: I can see deep down that you're a decent man.
• 46:16
  Speaker 1: What's going on here? That's it. Yeah. Yeah, it's just,
• 46:19
  Speaker 1: what's the point? Why bother? We don't think so.
• 46:22
  Speaker 4: Homer is now sad at home because Moe's is closed
• 46:25
  Speaker 4: for the time being. And Marge says that she enjoys
• 46:28
  Speaker 4: having each other's company. We should enjoy each other's company.
• 46:30
  Speaker 4: I'm enjoying having you around here. This is the thing
• 46:33
  Speaker 4: about Marge is it's like, Homer, you've got this sexy
• 46:36
  Speaker 4: woman who is DTF at home.
• 46:38
  Speaker 1: What are you doing? Why are you hanging out at Moe's?
• 46:40
  Speaker 4: I just want to be at Moe's. And then he
• 46:42
  Speaker 4: has a thought bubble about the bad candy. So I
• 46:44
  Speaker 4: guess that's the.
• 46:45
  Speaker 1: Payoff, but whatever. Not all payoffs are payoffs. No, Moe
• 46:50
  Speaker 1: then judges- Not all payoffs are jackpots, shall we say.
• 46:53
  Speaker 1: There we go, yeah. Hey. You proud? I am. Feeling
• 46:59
  Speaker 1: pretty good about myself.
• 47:00
  Speaker 4: Moe then judges the beard and mustache contest and the
• 47:03
  Speaker 4: crazy rich Texan. Does he ever name the crazy rich Texan?
• 47:06
  Speaker 4: Let's have a look. I'm assuming by like season 37
• 47:09
  Speaker 4: they've given him some stupid name because they give everyone
• 47:10
  Speaker 4: a name these days. Crazy rich Texan Simpsons. What's his name?
• 47:16
  Speaker 1: Just the rich Texan. Yeah. Oh, his name's Richard Texan. Oh, okay.
• 47:21
  Speaker 1: Is it? Richard Rich Texan. Also known as the Rich Texan. Also,
• 47:25
  Speaker 1: and Senator Shady Bird Johnson. What? Is that a nickname
• 47:29
  Speaker 1: that he's given or anything like that? I don't know.
• 47:31
  Speaker 1: He makes his first appearance in the gambling episode with Marge.
• 47:36
  Speaker 1: I must admit, his name actually being Richard Rich Texan
• 47:40
  Speaker 1: is the kind of gag that is so stupid that
• 47:43
  Speaker 1: I kind of admire it.
• 47:44
  Speaker 4: What are your thoughts on when they revealed Homer's middle name?
• 47:48
  Speaker 4: So it was a big thing. This week, we'll find
• 47:50
  Speaker 4: out what the J stands for. The J stands for J.
• 47:52
  Speaker 4: It just stands for J.
• 47:56
  Speaker 1: That one I don't like as much. See, my kids
• 47:58
  Speaker 1: are smashing through The Sims at the moment. Yes. And
• 48:01
  Speaker 1: they got to that episode recently. And Ali's like, it
• 48:06
  Speaker 1: is J. It's great. It was hilarious. It always was Jay.
• 48:13
  Speaker 1: Something I really enjoy is when you imitate Elliot responding
• 48:17
  Speaker 1: to pop culture. He's doing a Bobby Hill. He's doing this.
• 48:22
  Speaker 1: He's doing the stuff with the raising their hands and
• 48:24
  Speaker 1: lifting their arms. What? You're doing that? What? See this?
• 48:27
  Speaker 1: Doing the shrug. He didn't know what it was. He'd
• 48:29
  Speaker 1: been saying Jay the whole time. It was Jay. I'm
• 48:35
  Speaker 1: just picturing Elliot growing up to be like an expert
• 48:37
  Speaker 1: hankler like most. Can you believe this shit?
• 48:41
  Speaker 4: Elliot's favorite line in that entire episode, and I was
• 48:44
  Speaker 4: very proud, was when Homer's got the hippies next to
• 48:46
  Speaker 4: him and the cops are going to arrest him. And
• 48:48
  Speaker 4: Homer says something like, you can't get us, whatever. And
• 48:49
  Speaker 4: they go, this man does not represent us. Elliot thought,
• 48:52
  Speaker 4: he's laughing his ass off. I'm like, I don't think
• 48:54
  Speaker 4: you even understand it. But the fact that you're laughing,
• 48:56
  Speaker 4: I'm very proud of it.
• 48:57
  Speaker 1: Good for you.
• 48:57
  Speaker 4: This man does not represent us. But yeah, so this
• 49:02
  Speaker 4: is where Homer's judging the contest and the rich Texan
• 49:04
  Speaker 4: walks up to him. Um, he says you should share
• 49:06
  Speaker 4: this hate with everybody. And we get a montage of
• 49:08
  Speaker 4: him just doing various contests. I've been the bonsai tree contest.
• 49:11
  Speaker 4: We have the bullying contest where they're smashing sandcastles and whatnot.
• 49:15
  Speaker 4: Then sad is a little helper He's sad.
• 49:16
  Speaker 1: He's outside.
• 49:17
  Speaker 4: He's feeling down on himself because everyone thinks he's ugly.
• 49:19
  Speaker 4: Then Homer offers to cook dinner because, you know, he's
• 49:22
  Speaker 4: around the house now.
• 49:23
  Speaker 1: Sure. Pull your weight? Yeah.
• 49:24
  Speaker 4: She says, you know, keep me company while I do it.
• 49:27
  Speaker 4: And then she realizes that she doesn't want Homer around.
• 49:29
  Speaker 1: So, look, I'll just, I'll cook later. And then... Do
• 49:31
  Speaker 1: you have this where it's... It's often presented as a
• 49:35
  Speaker 1: lovely romantic comedy trope or whatever. It's like, we're working
• 49:38
  Speaker 1: together in the kitchen. Oh, no. Like, no, no, no. No.
• 49:41
  Speaker 1: One person in the kitchen at one time. Yeah, it's true. Oh, yeah.
• 49:44
  Speaker 1: I'm trying to feel when Nicola's trying to cook dinner.
• 49:46
  Speaker 1: She's like, just don't.
• 49:47
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 49:48
  Speaker 1: Oh, the lovely way you look at it. Like, what
• 49:49
  Speaker 1: can I do to help you? You can stand over there. Yeah.
• 49:52
  Speaker 1: Exactly right.
• 49:53
  Speaker 4: It's always best to start off by saying, what can
• 49:55
  Speaker 4: I do to help? Don't just try and help. Ask first.
• 49:58
  Speaker 1: But sometimes they might want help. Yeah, it's true. And likewise,
• 50:01
  Speaker 1: the lovely Louise, I mean, I will go over and
• 50:03
  Speaker 1: make dinner or something, or I'll have her over dinner
• 50:04
  Speaker 1: at mine. And she'll be like, what can I do?
• 50:07
  Speaker 1: I said, you can sit down and just take a break.
• 50:10
  Speaker 4: I love how you sort of, and I do the same,
• 50:12
  Speaker 4: you position it like you're trying to do something for them.
• 50:14
  Speaker 4: But what you can do is you can just relax
• 50:15
  Speaker 4: over there.
• 50:16
  Speaker 1: Enjoy some time. It's really like, I don't want you
• 50:18
  Speaker 1: fucking anywhere near my food. Fuck out of the kitchen.
• 50:24
  Speaker 1: You just relax, babe. Go have a bath. Stay out
• 50:27
  Speaker 1: of the blast radius. You deserve it. You deserve the rest.
• 50:31
  Speaker 1: Let me do the cooking. What great guys we are.
• 50:36
  Speaker 1: But yeah, no, this is a unisex, unilateral decision. Stay
• 50:39
  Speaker 1: in the kitchen. One person in the kitchen. I mean,
• 50:41
  Speaker 1: this- Life is not the bear.
• 50:43
  Speaker 4: The more we think about it, this whole, I think
• 50:46
  Speaker 4: we discussed at the start, like this whole B plot
• 50:47
  Speaker 4: could have been a story because it's true. Like there
• 50:50
  Speaker 4: is comedy in that.
• 50:51
  Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely.
• 50:52
  Speaker 4: And they kind of touch on it here, but it's-
• 50:54
  Speaker 4: pretty rushed it's like i think marge thinking that she
• 50:57
  Speaker 4: would like having homer around and realizing quickly oh shit.
• 51:00
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah no absence can make the heart grow fonder.
• 51:02
  Speaker 4: Yeah no watching tv doesn't work she wants to read
• 51:04
  Speaker 4: the book and homer's got um he's replaced her book
• 51:06
  Speaker 4: or no no she's reading a book that homer's written
• 51:08
  Speaker 4: or something it's like bob doll's memoirs or whatever i
• 51:10
  Speaker 4: think he just sort of he put the first page
• 51:13
  Speaker 4: as something personalized like a message like oh the rest
• 51:15
  Speaker 4: of it is bob doll's autobiography or something or his memoirs.
• 51:17
  Speaker 1: I think it's called hey marge what are you reading
• 51:19
  Speaker 1: that's the book yeah it's Then Mo judges Dr. Nick.
• 51:23
  Speaker 1: What was the contest? I can't remember. I just remember
• 51:24
  Speaker 1: him saying they weren't corpses. Yeah, wasn't it like- Because
• 51:27
  Speaker 1: they're bringing more corpses. Yeah, best autopsy or something. Yeah.
• 51:30
  Speaker 1: Or best operation. Yeah. And I know this sounds like
• 51:32
  Speaker 1: a nitpick, but it ends with Dr. Nick going, uh-oh.
• 51:35
  Speaker 1: I'm like, we didn't need the uh-oh? It's implied with
• 51:38
  Speaker 1: the fact that they weren't corpses? There was a time
• 51:41
  Speaker 1: when The Simpsons used to go, uh-oh, SpaghettiOs. And that
• 51:45
  Speaker 1: was the joke? Yeah, that was making fun of shitty catchphrases. Anyway.
• 51:50
  Speaker 4: In saying that, Like I said, my kids are smashing
• 51:52
  Speaker 4: through the Simpsons. One of their favorite catchphrases, hi, everybody.
• 51:55
  Speaker 1: Okay. Dr. Nick's got some fans. Yes.
• 51:59
  Speaker 4: Then the agent from Uncreative Agents Agency offers a gig
• 52:03
  Speaker 4: to Mo. You're mean, you're funny, and you're not British.
• 52:05
  Speaker 1: That's another lazy gag because, I mean, there's actually an
• 52:09
  Speaker 1: agency called CAA, Creative Artists Agency. It's just like, uncreative. Wait, what? Oh, man.
• 52:17
  Speaker 1: bad that we're just sort of like ragging on all
• 52:18
  Speaker 1: these dumb gags. But hey, you guys wrote the dumb gags.
• 52:21
  Speaker 4: That does feel very first draft though. Like what's a
• 52:23
  Speaker 4: funny spin on this? We'll be like, I'm the creator.
• 52:25
  Speaker 1: That'll show them. What a zinger. I'm just imagining this
• 52:31
  Speaker 1: guy named Michael Ovitz who was like the head of it,
• 52:33
  Speaker 1: of CAA and one of the most powerful guys in Hollywood.
• 52:35
  Speaker 1: Just him up in his, sitting at the top of
• 52:37
  Speaker 1: the skyscraper. Damn it. They got me. They still read
• 52:42
  Speaker 1: through me.
• 52:43
  Speaker 4: The thing is, the irony of this being that that
• 52:45
  Speaker 4: joke is probably the most uncreative Yes.
• 52:47
  Speaker 1: Joke.
• 52:48
  Speaker 4: It's been on that title. But then he reads through
• 52:51
  Speaker 4: all the various shows.
• 52:52
  Speaker 1: I think I mentioned earlier during my favourite moments, TV,
• 52:57
  Speaker 1: that crap's still on. Yes. Great.
• 53:01
  Speaker 3: So what kind of reality shows are we talking about here?
• 53:04
  Speaker 1: Well, to name just a few.
• 53:05
  Speaker 2: America's Ripest Bananas, So You Think You Can Judge, Who
• 53:08
  Speaker 2: Wants to Be a Welder, Poodle vs. Elephant, Leg Swap,
• 53:11
  Speaker 2: Old People Try to Figure Out Computers, American Idol, Dancing
• 53:13
  Speaker 2: with Cars of the Stars, America's Drunkest Nobody, Let's Make
• 53:16
  Speaker 2: a Veal.
• 53:17
  Speaker 3: Love that show.
• 53:18
  Speaker 2: Somali Pirate Apprentice.
• 53:19
  Speaker 3: Right, yeah, with those guys.
• 53:20
  Speaker 1: Fix Andy Dick.
• 53:21
  Speaker 3: It's about time.
• 53:22
  Speaker 2: Bottom Chef, My Life on Kathy Griffin, Pimp My Crypt,
• 53:26
  Speaker 2: Are You Fatter Than a Fifth Grader, and Grave Robbers
• 53:28
  Speaker 2: of Orange County.
• 53:28
  Speaker 3: Jeez, that's, uh.
• 53:30
  Speaker 1: Quite a list. Hang on, I'm getting the text.
• 53:32
  Speaker 2: Ooh, those were all just cancelled except for American Idol.
• 53:34
  Speaker 3: Did you just say Armenian Idol?
• 53:36
  Speaker 1: Because that's my favorite show. No, no, no, no, no.
• 53:38
  Speaker 1: American Idol. Oh, yeah.
• 53:40
  Speaker 3: Who's there Igor Glomov?
• 53:41
  Speaker 1: Randy Jackson. Good enough. Old people trying to figure out computers.
• 53:46
  Speaker 1: I would actually want to watch that. Oh my goodness.
• 53:47
  Speaker 1: That sounds like a reality show that should be made today.
• 53:50
  Speaker 1: Old people trying to figure out technology. You could do
• 53:52
  Speaker 1: it either way. You could be just like an absolute
• 53:54
  Speaker 1: monster like Two-factor verification? I don't know what that means.
• 53:59
  Speaker 1: And then everybody laughs.
• 54:01
  Speaker 4: My parents struggle to add things to their wallet, like
• 54:03
  Speaker 4: the tickets and stuff. They're like, I just want to
• 54:05
  Speaker 4: print a ticket. They're like, no, you've got to add
• 54:06
  Speaker 4: it to your wallet.
• 54:07
  Speaker 1: I don't know what you're talking about. How do I
• 54:09
  Speaker 1: get it off my phone into my wallet? No, you've
• 54:14
  Speaker 1: got a wallet on your phone. How does it work?
• 54:17
  Speaker 1: Here's my wallet. Get into my- I'm not doing this
• 54:19
  Speaker 1: as your folks. No, no, no. I'm doing this as
• 54:20
  Speaker 1: generic old person. Default old person. And also me. Because
• 54:23
  Speaker 1: there will be occasions when I'm like, put this in
• 54:25
  Speaker 1: your wallet. It's like, oh, that's right. Google Wallet. I would.
• 54:30
  Speaker 1: But no, I mean, it could be a genuinely instructional
• 54:33
  Speaker 1: show about- Technology is moving ahead in leaps and bounds.
• 54:38
  Speaker 1: You may have trouble catching up. We're here to help.
• 54:41
  Speaker 1: You've given me an idea. Shit, we should fucking do that.
• 54:43
  Speaker 1: You've given me an idea for a channel. It's like
• 54:44
  Speaker 1: a young person explains to- It's like my kids- Maybe
• 54:47
  Speaker 1: like a YouTube channel. Yeah, because some parents are too
• 54:50
  Speaker 1: embarrassed to ask their kid, how do I add this
• 54:51
  Speaker 1: to my wallet? Let's make a video for it. Absolutely.
• 54:54
  Speaker 1: There's a very, very popular YouTube channel called Dad How
• 54:59
  Speaker 1: Do I? Yeah. Have you ever heard of it? Yeah, yeah.
• 55:01
  Speaker 1: Have you seen this? Have you heard about this? Sorry,
• 55:03
  Speaker 1: I know. I've got to do it every time. But yeah,
• 55:05
  Speaker 1: I mean, for those of you who don't know about it,
• 55:08
  Speaker 1: there's this guy, middle-aged guy from somewhere in middle America,
• 55:11
  Speaker 1: as far as I can tell. Just your average dude
• 55:13
  Speaker 1: is like- Couldn't be any more middle. He's got to
• 55:18
  Speaker 1: take some time, give a- Middle Eastern guy. Yeah, his
• 55:21
  Speaker 1: name is Ahmed. No, no, no. I don't know if
• 55:24
  Speaker 1: he's like, I lost my dad when I was young,
• 55:27
  Speaker 1: or I never had a dad growing up, so I
• 55:29
  Speaker 1: don't know how to do these very basic things that
• 55:31
  Speaker 1: dads are supposed to teach their sons. Like, How do
• 55:34
  Speaker 1: I shave properly? How do I change a tire, et cetera?
• 55:37
  Speaker 1: It's like, dad, how do I do this? And he
• 55:40
  Speaker 1: does it. It's incredibly popular. And I've watched a few episodes.
• 55:43
  Speaker 1: I'm like, I can see why. This guy's just nice.
• 55:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 55:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah. And helpful. That's great. Okay, we should do this.
• 55:50
  Speaker 1: We should do this YouTube channel about. You'd be the
• 55:52
  Speaker 1: old person.
• 55:53
  Speaker 2: Oh, yeah.
• 55:53
  Speaker 1: I'd be very... What the hell? That's a phone. Make
• 55:57
  Speaker 1: calls on it. The thing is, though, imagine... You're making
• 56:01
  Speaker 1: calls on your phone? Who's picking up? Well, this is
• 56:04
  Speaker 1: the thing. No one remembers phone numbers anymore, do they? Oh, God, no.
• 56:07
  Speaker 1: Maybe your spouse is in your own. That's it.
• 56:09
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 56:09
  Speaker 4: But I would definitely watch a show. You just go
• 56:12
  Speaker 4: to a retirement home. It's full of 75-plus-year-olds. I just
• 56:17
  Speaker 4: put a couple of iPads in there. Put some apps
• 56:19
  Speaker 4: on there and say, figure this out. What do you
• 56:20
  Speaker 4: think of this? And they've probably never seen an iPad
• 56:22
  Speaker 4: in their life.
• 56:22
  Speaker 1: Yeah. It would be amazing television. Oh, yeah. It's like...
• 56:27
  Speaker 1: Have like one of the apps... You know, shaking it
• 56:29
  Speaker 1: like an Etch-a-Sketch or whatever. It's like, no, no, you
• 56:31
  Speaker 1: put your finger on that and you move it there.
• 56:32
  Speaker 1: It's like, holy shit. You're like watching the apes with
• 56:36
  Speaker 1: like fire. Oh, yeah. Well, I.
• 56:40
  Speaker 4: Have like one of the apps that's like random links
• 56:42
  Speaker 4: to like Lemon Party just to really fuck with them.
• 56:44
  Speaker 1: Oh, my God. I think I was telling you, I mean,
• 56:46
  Speaker 1: when I... when I did the Spielberg series of podcasts
• 56:51
  Speaker 1: with Charlie Clawson, one of the things I was talking
• 56:53
  Speaker 1: about was Minority Report, and that came out in 2002.
• 56:56
  Speaker 1: You're looking at Tom Cruise on that, moving things around
• 56:59
  Speaker 1: on the screen, you know, shift, shift, shift, shift, shift,
• 57:01
  Speaker 1: and it's like, wow, future looks incredible. I can't wait
• 57:04
  Speaker 1: to do that in 2060. And it's like, yeah, five
• 57:07
  Speaker 1: years later, you're doing that shit.
• 57:10
  Speaker 4: But yeah, again, it's just for me, him reading out.
• 57:12
  Speaker 1: All these lines. Yes, sorry, we're only halfway through. Some
• 57:15
  Speaker 1: of them are funny, but it just feels like I
• 57:18
  Speaker 1: don't know, like we were saying earlier, these would be
• 57:21
  Speaker 1: on the posters of the TV studio as they're walking through. Yeah,
• 57:24
  Speaker 1: or like the news ticker underneath Kent Brockman or something
• 57:28
  Speaker 1: like that. It's like, say, Dancing with Cars of the
• 57:30
  Speaker 1: Stars renewed for the 17th consecutive season or something like that.
• 57:33
  Speaker 1: There's funny names in there. There are some.
• 57:36
  Speaker 4: But the fact that you just wasted like 30 seconds
• 57:38
  Speaker 4: of the episode just listening to the point where the
• 57:40
  Speaker 4: character has to say, that's a lot of shows you
• 57:42
  Speaker 4: got there. It's like, you've been acknowledging it. Yeah, that it's,
• 57:48
  Speaker 4: but that's the joke.
• 57:49
  Speaker 1: And I'm like, is it? He loved it when he
• 57:53
  Speaker 1: kept stepping down the ranks. Anyway.
• 57:54
  Speaker 4: He gets a phone call and all of them are
• 57:56
  Speaker 4: being cancelled except for American Idol, which Mo thinks is Armenian,
• 57:59
  Speaker 4: Armenia Idol, which is apparently.
• 58:01
  Speaker 1: A real show. Okay. Yeah. Armenia's got its idols as well. Yeah.
• 58:05
  Speaker 1: So then we come up from commercial, Mo now arrives
• 58:07
  Speaker 1: in LA. Did you know there was an Australian Idol?
• 58:10
  Speaker 1: There was, yeah. Touchdown. That's right. Still exists apparently. Does
• 58:14
  Speaker 1: it really? Oh yeah. I find it so, I mean,
• 58:17
  Speaker 1: I feel weird saying I don't watch a lot of
• 58:19
  Speaker 1: commercial TV these days. But when I do, they'll occasionally
• 58:22
  Speaker 1: be like, I mean, Lou and I were watching, I think,
• 58:24
  Speaker 1: something on Channel 10 the other night. It's like, big
• 58:28
  Speaker 1: brother's coming back. It's like, big brother's coming back? Well,
• 58:30
  Speaker 1: it came back last year. And we're for like eight weeks.
• 58:32
  Speaker 1: And it's still on. Yeah. It's like, who the fuck cares? Yeah,
• 58:36
  Speaker 1: it's bizarre. We have an.
• 58:38
  Speaker 4: nightly ritual now is that the kids love deal or
• 58:40
  Speaker 4: no deal because it's a simple game for them to
• 58:42
  Speaker 4: follow along with and you get to do the no
• 58:45
  Speaker 4: deal thing Holly loves it yeah of course these people
• 58:50
  Speaker 4: don't know what they're doing and as I was saying
• 58:51
  Speaker 4: I've mentioned before every time Holly thinks she's going to
• 58:54
  Speaker 4: get she's like no deal she's going for the no
• 58:57
  Speaker 4: deal and we're like.
• 59:00
  Speaker 1: Didn't see that coming Holly you got us.
• 59:06
  Speaker 4: Oh the amusement never ends but Mo arrives in LA
• 59:08
  Speaker 4: And again, we get a little montage. here of him
• 59:10
  Speaker 4: just various things in LA. So I think there's one
• 59:12
  Speaker 4: where people are going into a plastic surgery, coming out
• 59:14
  Speaker 4: looking like hot women.
• 59:16
  Speaker 1: Ugly people with regular dogs are going in. They're all
• 59:18
  Speaker 1: coming out as like- Paris Hilton. Paris Hilton with a chihuahua. Yeah, yeah.
• 59:22
  Speaker 4: And then he asks the driver to put a song
• 59:24
  Speaker 4: about LA or California, but he puts on Sweet Home
• 59:26
  Speaker 4: Alabama instead.
• 59:28
  Speaker 1: I guess, whatever. Anyway, but yeah, so the various things
• 59:32
  Speaker 1: are the stadium is home to no team. Cause I
• 59:34
  Speaker 1: guess the LA team at that point didn't have a team.
• 59:37
  Speaker 1: They must've moved or something. Or things just kept getting re-sponsored.
• 59:41
  Speaker 1: I mean, cause is there a, I think LA has
• 59:43
  Speaker 1: like a crypto.com stadium or something like that.
• 59:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 59:47
  Speaker 1: And I mean, even looking at Melbourne now, I mean,
• 59:50
  Speaker 1: it used to be ETSA and now it's Marvel stadium.
• 59:52
  Speaker 1: It's been Marvel stadium for a while, but I mean,
• 59:54
  Speaker 1: Marvel's not quite the powerhouse. It's Colonial Stadium. Is it?
• 59:56
  Speaker 1: That's what it used to be called. It started at Colonial,
• 59:58
  Speaker 1: then it became the Tushda Dome. The T-Dome. And then
• 1:00:01
  Speaker 1: the wokest one was like, Colonial, not a good look.
• 1:00:05
  Speaker 1: But I mean, Marvel's no longer the sort of cultural and,
• 1:00:08
  Speaker 1: dare I say, economic powerhouse that it once was. We'll
• 1:00:11
  Speaker 1: see what happens when Avengers Doomsday come out later this year.
• 1:00:13
  Speaker 1: But yeah, it feels old. It's like, oh, it's called Marvel?
• 1:00:19
  Speaker 4: How did NFL have no teams in Los Angeles for
• 1:00:21
  Speaker 4: so long before the current Rams team moved there? So
• 1:00:24
  Speaker 4: I moved to the USA at about the same time
• 1:00:26
  Speaker 4: as the Rams moved to LA. And I just find
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 4: it so odd that the nation's second largest city had
• 1:00:32
  Speaker 4: no team in America's most popular sport before 2016. Oh,
• 1:00:35
  Speaker 4: so that's the joke.
• 1:00:37
  Speaker 1: Okay, interesting. How did LA not have a football team?
• 1:00:40
  Speaker 1: That's wild, right? Yeah. I guess that's the joke.
• 1:00:43
  Speaker 4: I really liked the joke, though, of Orange's $ 3, Screenplay's $ 2.
• 1:00:46
  Speaker 1: That's right.
• 1:00:49
  Speaker 4: Then they arrive at Fox Studios, Animation Domination, and Live
• 1:00:53
  Speaker 4: Action Surrender. But we got back to home, and Homer
• 1:00:55
  Speaker 4: has organized the kitchen. He's put labels on everything. The
• 1:00:58
  Speaker 4: mixed spices are now mixed together to make a super spice.
• 1:01:01
  Speaker 4: And Marge is just hyperventilating, as you would be.
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 1: Of course.
• 1:01:04
  Speaker 4: You know what I hate, though, is I hate when
• 1:01:06
  Speaker 4: people think they're doing good, and you appreciate the effort,
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 4: but it's like you fucked everything up. So for me,
• 1:01:13
  Speaker 4: the big one was I had a bunch of jumpers
• 1:01:15
  Speaker 4: that I got from our pals at Uncle Rico, right?
• 1:01:17
  Speaker 4: And you've got to wash these jumpers a certain way,
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 4: or they will shrink.
• 1:01:20
  Speaker 1: Mm-hmm.
• 1:01:20
  Speaker 4: And we got home from holiday. My sister was looking
• 1:01:22
  Speaker 4: after the house. And she goes, I washed all your jumpers.
• 1:01:25
  Speaker 4: And I had my jumpers in a basket separate. I
• 1:01:27
  Speaker 4: used to keep them separate to hand wash them.
• 1:01:28
  Speaker 1: Correct.
• 1:01:30
  Speaker 4: And she washed them all. The first thing I saw
• 1:01:33
  Speaker 4: when I walked to the house was all my jumpers
• 1:01:34
  Speaker 4: folded up on my bed.
• 1:01:35
  Speaker 1: I was like, oh, no. Oh, no. I was like,
• 1:01:39
  Speaker 1: did you wash yours? Yeah, I washed them all for you.
• 1:01:40
  Speaker 1: And I was like, I can't be angry because I
• 1:01:43
  Speaker 1: didn't tell you. She was going out of her way
• 1:01:45
  Speaker 1: to help. And I was like, oh, no. And all
• 1:01:48
  Speaker 1: the jumpers are too small now. All of them too small.
• 1:01:50
  Speaker 1: And you can't get them anymore. I was just... I
• 1:01:54
  Speaker 1: know you thought you were helping, but you fucked it.
• 1:01:58
  Speaker 1: Looks like someone's going on a diet. No, it was just...
• 1:02:02
  Speaker 1: They've gone from large to extra small. That's the height. Oh, no.
• 1:02:05
  Speaker 1: It's just they're too short. Oh, no. They're like crop tops. Well,
• 1:02:08
  Speaker 1: looks like Elliot's getting some nice jumpers. He's going to
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 1: wear a George Costanza jumper. I'm the coolest kid in school.
• 1:02:14
  Speaker 1: How would you feel if.
• 1:02:15
  Speaker 4: You walked around and you saw a child who was
• 1:02:17
  Speaker 4: Elliot's age wearing a George Costanza in his undies on
• 1:02:19
  Speaker 4: the couch jumper?
• 1:02:21
  Speaker 1: An eight-year-old. I'd take a picture of him and put
• 1:02:24
  Speaker 1: in the ugly baby red.
• 1:02:27
  Speaker 4: But it's a margin type of ventilating. And she decides
• 1:02:30
  Speaker 4: to drop Homer off at a sports bar. And he
• 1:02:32
  Speaker 4: doesn't like this. He's just like, no, no, I don't
• 1:02:33
  Speaker 4: want a real sports bar because, you know, they're watching
• 1:02:35
  Speaker 4: the grid irons on TV. I think it's called the
• 1:02:37
  Speaker 4: grid iron, actually. That's what the place is called. They're
• 1:02:39
  Speaker 4: watching the cross. And then he asked the question about
• 1:02:41
  Speaker 4: the XFL and They suggest that he goes to a
• 1:02:43
  Speaker 4: gay bar, PF.
• 1:02:44
  Speaker 1: Wings, across the road. And I'm like, oh, sure. I
• 1:02:47
  Speaker 1: think it was PF Wangs. PF Wangs. It was PF Wangs.
• 1:02:50
  Speaker 1: I've read it. It's wings. Yeah, PF Wangs. It was
• 1:02:51
  Speaker 1: a good name. It's pretty good. It's obvious, but it's good.
• 1:02:54
  Speaker 1: But this place reminded me of the Sporting Globe. Oh, yes. Yeah.
• 1:02:58
  Speaker 4: It's not a pub for- Men, it's young dudes who
• 1:03:01
  Speaker 4: are into UFC with neck tattoos.
• 1:03:03
  Speaker 1: It's a place for bros.
• 1:03:04
  Speaker 4: Yes, for bros, yeah. Who talk about their super coach
• 1:03:07
  Speaker 4: teams and things like that. And the guys at the
• 1:03:09
  Speaker 4: pub are just like.
• 1:03:09
  Speaker 1: Who's winning? Well, they're very big into MMA. Yeah, that's
• 1:03:12
  Speaker 1: what I said. They got their UFC with the neck tattoos, yeah. Okay, yeah.
• 1:03:15
  Speaker 1: But I think I've said that some good mates and I,
• 1:03:18
  Speaker 1: we were meeting for lunch one Sunday afternoon. Went to
• 1:03:22
  Speaker 1: the Sporting Globe. UFC pay-per-view was on. One of my
• 1:03:26
  Speaker 1: mates works as a correctional officer and he's like, the
• 1:03:28
  Speaker 1: vibe in here is all wrong. We're getting out. It's like, well,
• 1:03:31
  Speaker 1: this guy's been, you know, witness to prison riots. Let's go.
• 1:03:35
  Speaker 4: This is where we get the wrap-up of the Santa's
• 1:03:41
  Speaker 4: Little Helper story. If you can even call it a story.
• 1:03:43
  Speaker 4: Lisa goes to chat with him, says that he's great,
• 1:03:45
  Speaker 4: says he's not ugly. They scoot around the ground together
• 1:03:47
  Speaker 4: and that is the end of that.
• 1:03:49
  Speaker 1: What a happy ending. What was the fucking point? I
• 1:03:50
  Speaker 1: don't know, man. What was the point? Yeah.
• 1:03:52
  Speaker 4: You could have just had them Him proud that he
• 1:03:55
  Speaker 4: won the contest and he gets given a bone because
• 1:03:57
  Speaker 4: he can't understand English.
• 1:03:58
  Speaker 1: Correct. He's happy. They win. He gets a bone. End
• 1:04:02
  Speaker 1: of that story. Anyway. You fixed it. Moe then meets
• 1:04:06
  Speaker 1: Simon Cowell.
• 1:04:07
  Speaker 3: I really appreciate you showing me around, Simon.
• 1:04:10
  Speaker 5: Always happy to help the newbies.
• 1:04:11
  Speaker 1: And how'd you like LA?
• 1:04:13
  Speaker 3: Oh, it's a hell of a city. It's like somebody
• 1:04:15
  Speaker 3: stepped on New York and scraped it.
• 1:04:17
  Speaker 1: Off on the beach. Clever. Slightly nasty. Very impressive.
• 1:04:21
  Speaker 5: You know, I don't say this often, Mo, but I
• 1:04:23
  Speaker 5: actually think you're quite good at this.
• 1:04:27
  Speaker 3: Oh, well.
• 1:04:29
  Speaker 4: Then the paparazzi call Mo the creature from Pan's Labyrinth,
• 1:04:32
  Speaker 4: I think, because they take a photo of him and
• 1:04:33
  Speaker 4: it appears in the newspaper or magazine or whatever. So
• 1:04:35
  Speaker 4: Ham is now in the basement looking for something to
• 1:04:37
  Speaker 4: do because he says he didn't like the bar because
• 1:04:38
  Speaker 4: the sports bar was for diehard sports fans. He's not
• 1:04:40
  Speaker 4: a diehard sports fan. He just wanted to watch some sport.
• 1:04:42
  Speaker 1: And have a few beers. So he's pulled apart the
• 1:04:44
  Speaker 1: washing machine to find the penny that was once in
• 1:04:46
  Speaker 1: his pocket. I like this.
• 1:04:47
  Speaker 4: When did you get the guy to do it? You
• 1:04:50
  Speaker 4: want to parts and later pick one, buddy. Then the
• 1:04:53
  Speaker 4: water tank leaks and he covers his mouth and water
• 1:04:56
  Speaker 4: pops out of his ears.
• 1:04:56
  Speaker 1: And I think his head starts getting bigger. And I
• 1:04:58
  Speaker 1: was like, eh.
• 1:04:59
  Speaker 4: Then grandpa says that I can, he says to Marge,
• 1:05:02
  Speaker 4: I can help you distract Homer. And he suggests golf,
• 1:05:04
  Speaker 4: doesn't he?
• 1:05:05
  Speaker 3: He does.
• 1:05:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah. Which is, I believe I said earlier in
• 1:05:09
  Speaker 1: the episode. Yes. It is something that, yes, will definitely
• 1:05:12
  Speaker 1: get people out of the house. Yes. For a prolonged period.
• 1:05:15
  Speaker 1: It will. Margaret Mary was a golfer. Yeah. I rarely
• 1:05:18
  Speaker 1: saw her growing up. Really? Oh, I mean, I saw
• 1:05:21
  Speaker 1: her a bit growing up. But yeah, she really enjoyed
• 1:05:23
  Speaker 1: her golf. She fitted me in on a Sunday for
• 1:05:24
  Speaker 1: two hours. Well, correct. I mean, there would be occasions
• 1:05:26
  Speaker 1: when I would actually, you know, little guy, would get
• 1:05:30
  Speaker 1: his exercise by walking around as mum did 18 holes. Yeah? Yeah,
• 1:05:33
  Speaker 1: and I'm being a little caddy. Yeah? Loved it? It
• 1:05:35
  Speaker 1: was kind of cute. Yeah? Yeah. I need to get
• 1:05:37
  Speaker 1: back into golf.
• 1:05:39
  Speaker 4: I love how, like, Margaret's like, I'm not going to
• 1:05:40
  Speaker 4: do any of your hobbies. You can join me on
• 1:05:42
  Speaker 4: my hobby.
• 1:05:44
  Speaker 1: We occasionally went to the movies. And when I'm not
• 1:05:45
  Speaker 1: doing my hobby, you're going to a boarding school. Guy,
• 1:05:51
  Speaker 1: we've come up with a fun new hobby for you. Boarding.
• 1:05:56
  Speaker 5: Sounds great.
• 1:05:57
  Speaker 4: Simon's now given Mo his assistant's work number because Mo
• 1:05:59
  Speaker 4: thought they were bros because, you know, I thought he
• 1:06:01
  Speaker 4: gave me your number, but that's not the case. And
• 1:06:03
  Speaker 4: he says to him, he gives him some advice. Do
• 1:06:05
  Speaker 4: not become the mean judge because I'm lonely. Nobody dares
• 1:06:07
  Speaker 4: to be my friend because I think I'm going to
• 1:06:09
  Speaker 4: judge them and be mean to them. And this is
• 1:06:11
  Speaker 4: where he's basically setting me up for the end. Did
• 1:06:14
  Speaker 4: you watch this.
• 1:06:14
  Speaker 1: Knowing this is where this was going to go? I
• 1:06:16
  Speaker 1: did not. You didn't?
• 1:06:16
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 1:06:17
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I kind of had a feeling. It's almost there.
• 1:06:20
  Speaker 1: They gave Simon Cowell more character development than I anticipated
• 1:06:25
  Speaker 1: they would. Yeah.
• 1:06:26
  Speaker 4: Moe then thinks, no, people just, no, they know I'm kidding.
• 1:06:29
  Speaker 4: And then he plays random clips. How he got his
• 1:06:31
  Speaker 4: hands on these clips of the people at Springfield talking
• 1:06:33
  Speaker 4: about Moe, I have no idea. And they have Ralph
• 1:06:35
  Speaker 4: saying things, but it's all censored out. It's like, how outrageous.
• 1:06:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah. I feel bad for that because it's like, oh, yeah,
• 1:06:44
  Speaker 1: this will really work. You know, we're used to Ralph
• 1:06:46
  Speaker 1: doing one thing and just being challenged and innocent or whatever. Oh,
• 1:06:49
  Speaker 1: now he's a little swear machine. It's the most obvious
• 1:06:51
  Speaker 1: gag in the book.
• 1:06:52
  Speaker 4: We come back from commercial and now it's time for
• 1:06:53
  Speaker 4: the American Idol show. Randy gives a non-committing answer.
• 1:06:58
  Speaker 1: We've got Tara.
• 1:06:59
  Speaker 4: Alan rambles on and dances. None of the jokes here
• 1:07:02
  Speaker 4: are funny. It's just this is what they do on
• 1:07:03
  Speaker 4: the show. Yeah, it's not really that great. So then
• 1:07:06
  Speaker 4: it's time for Moe to give his advice to the
• 1:07:08
  Speaker 4: person that sang. And he has a little thought bubble
• 1:07:10
  Speaker 4: here of cow saying, don't be mean.
• 1:07:11
  Speaker 1: Remember, don't be mean. And so he's nice to the contestant.
• 1:07:13
  Speaker 4: And this is where Simon breaks him down because he's like,
• 1:07:15
  Speaker 4: I'm not going to let this guy get too popular
• 1:07:17
  Speaker 4: being the mean guy. I'm going to make sure I
• 1:07:19
  Speaker 4: cut him down.
• 1:07:20
  Speaker 1: Yeah, Simon Cowell basically uses his powers to, yeah. He
• 1:07:24
  Speaker 1: double-crossed him. Yeah, not to rip on the performer on stage,
• 1:07:26
  Speaker 1: but to rip on his fellow judge. Yeah. Cowell. So
• 1:07:29
  Speaker 1: Mo smashes the bottle, threatens to stab him, and I
• 1:07:32
  Speaker 1: think it's, what's the host's name? What's his name? Was
• 1:07:35
  Speaker 1: it Ryan Seacrest? Ryan Seacrest, yeah. He says, no, label
• 1:07:37
  Speaker 1: to camera, label to camera. Which I thought was pretty good, actually.
• 1:07:40
  Speaker 4: Margin drops Homer off at the golf course, or you
• 1:07:42
  Speaker 4: think she's going to drop him off, and she sees
• 1:07:44
  Speaker 4: the old guy there, and the old guy says, I
• 1:07:46
  Speaker 4: never saw my family again once I started playing golf.
• 1:07:48
  Speaker 4: I miss my daughter's wedding, and he's a sweet.
• 1:07:50
  Speaker 1: Guy, I'm told. It's when Marge realises, wait, this.
• 1:07:53
  Speaker 4: Is not a good idea, so she takes Homer away,
• 1:07:55
  Speaker 4: cuts to them having the best make-up sex they've ever had.
• 1:07:57
  Speaker 1: Indeed. Have we not already had Homer at a golf course?
• 1:08:02
  Speaker 1: Various times? Yeah, I was going to say, remember the
• 1:08:05
  Speaker 1: best one of all? It was the B-plot. It was
• 1:08:06
  Speaker 1: Scenes of Class Struggle in Springfield. That's right, yeah, yeah. Oh,
• 1:08:09
  Speaker 1: and he was good at golf. Yeah, that's right. Wait
• 1:08:12
  Speaker 1: a minute. What the hell's going on here? Guy, that
• 1:08:16
  Speaker 1: was 12 years ago. People have forgotten. You're telling me
• 1:08:20
  Speaker 1: I've got a wallet in my phone? What's going on here? See,
• 1:08:26
  Speaker 1: that's better callback joke instruction than this episode of The Simpsons.
• 1:08:29
  Speaker 1: And then Homer's like, I feel like the tiger woods
• 1:08:31
  Speaker 1: of sex. Ready for another round? And I'm just like... No. What? No.
• 1:08:37
  Speaker 1: He's just done 18 rounds. He's not doing another one.
• 1:08:42
  Speaker 1: Give a guy a break. Give Homer a mulligan. Yes.
• 1:08:48
  Speaker 1: A windy.
• 1:08:53
  Speaker 4: Moe then tells the story about how he was banned
• 1:08:55
  Speaker 4: from LA. He's back at Moe's now. And he can't
• 1:08:57
  Speaker 4: make judgments on anything ever again. And Barney then says,
• 1:09:01
  Speaker 4: I'm going to drive home because he can't judge me.
• 1:09:03
  Speaker 4: And he goes to the toilet, pretends he's driving home.
• 1:09:05
  Speaker 4: He's forbidden from watching Fox as well. And business has
• 1:09:08
  Speaker 4: never been better because Fox is now no longer on
• 1:09:10
  Speaker 4: the TV. And then Rupert Murdoch's there.
• 1:09:12
  Speaker 3: There is one bright side. I'm also forbidden from ever
• 1:09:15
  Speaker 3: watching Fox.
• 1:09:16
  Speaker 1: You can't even show it in the bar?
• 1:09:18
  Speaker 3: That's right. And business has never been better. Oh, hey,
• 1:09:27
  Speaker 3: how's it going there, Mr.
• 1:09:28
  Speaker 5: Murdoch?
• 1:09:28
  Speaker 1: Never mind me. Put on a Jay Leno show.
• 1:09:32
  Speaker 4: Have you seen this?
• 1:09:33
  Speaker 3: The president says Iran has gotten a hold of the
• 1:09:35
  Speaker 3: most dangerous weapon known to man.
• 1:09:37
  Speaker 5: The BP oil rig. That's right, ladies and gentlemen. I
• 1:09:40
  Speaker 5: know how to make that leak disappear. Put it on NBC.
• 1:09:45
  Speaker 1: And that's the end of the episode. And that's the
• 1:09:47
  Speaker 1: actual Rupert Murdoch.
• 1:09:48
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:09:49
  Speaker 4: Instead, though, it's like the last time you had him,
• 1:09:51
  Speaker 4: you had him saying billionaire tyrant. This time he was
• 1:09:54
  Speaker 4: just like.
• 1:09:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah. It was nothing. One of my all-time favorite games. Yeah.
• 1:09:59
  Speaker 1: I'm Rupert Murdoch, the billionaire tyrant. I mean, you've got
• 1:10:00
  Speaker 1: to give him kudos for being willing to say that. Sure. Oh, yeah.
• 1:10:04
  Speaker 1: I've gained a whole lot more. I mean, already respected,
• 1:10:08
  Speaker 1: which I mean feared. Isn't he from Geelong? Oh, no.
• 1:10:13
  Speaker 1: Did he have relatives in Geelong or something? Isn't he
• 1:10:16
  Speaker 1: associated with Geelong in some way? I think some of
• 1:10:18
  Speaker 1: his kids went to Geelong Grammar. Ah, okay. I mean, I...
• 1:10:22
  Speaker 1: His nephew or his, yeah, his nephew was in my year. Ah,
• 1:10:26
  Speaker 1: maybe it's what I'm thinking about. Yeah. All right.
• 1:10:29
  Speaker 5: Nice guy.
• 1:10:30
  Speaker 1: So Judge Me Tender. Still owes me five bucks. Does he?
• 1:10:35
  Speaker 1: With interest. Was it a good wristie though?
• 1:10:40
  Speaker 4: Some of my best work. Judge Me Tender as a
• 1:10:42
  Speaker 4: season finale was pretty disappointing. It just, it felt like,
• 1:10:47
  Speaker 4: you know, so we've had crossovers in the past. Particularly,
• 1:10:50
  Speaker 4: I think of the Springfield Files, right? Another Fox show,
• 1:10:52
  Speaker 4: the X-Files. But that was incorporated into the story. It
• 1:10:54
  Speaker 4: had an X-Files vibe, had the X-Files stars. But it
• 1:10:57
  Speaker 4: wasn't just them doing their thing.
• 1:10:59
  Speaker 1: Hey guys, we also show American Idol. It was those
• 1:11:02
  Speaker 1: two in Springfield, right? Yeah.
• 1:11:04
  Speaker 4: This just feels like we're going to add Mo to
• 1:11:07
  Speaker 4: American Idol, not make it funny in any way. It's
• 1:11:09
  Speaker 4: just American Idol on The Simpsons.
• 1:11:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah. I mean, we broke down our sort of how
• 1:11:16
  Speaker 1: we would do something with this idea. Maybe not with
• 1:11:19
  Speaker 1: maybe not with Idol, but yeah, about Mo being a
• 1:11:21
  Speaker 1: judge or Mo using his sarcasm and that for, I
• 1:11:25
  Speaker 1: don't know. Being a heckler. Yeah, for being a heckler. Yeah,
• 1:11:27
  Speaker 1: that's a really good idea. Yeah, this one, not so much. Plus,
• 1:11:35
  Speaker 1: I think we all know that Mo is kind of
• 1:11:37
  Speaker 1: caustic and a bit sarcastic and all that, but his
• 1:11:39
  Speaker 1: comebacks generally, when you think about it, or you never
• 1:11:43
  Speaker 1: really think of him as like, oh, you don't want
• 1:11:44
  Speaker 1: to get on the wrong side of Mo, he'll cut
• 1:11:45
  Speaker 1: you right down. It's more like- No one respects him.
• 1:11:48
  Speaker 5: No.
• 1:11:48
  Speaker 4: At the start of this episode, nobody respected him. He
• 1:11:50
  Speaker 4: makes a couple of funny gags, and everyone's like, hey, Moe,
• 1:11:52
  Speaker 4: we love you.
• 1:11:53
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and he doesn't really ever have a history of
• 1:11:55
  Speaker 1: making these kinds of funny gags. I mean, I love Moe.
• 1:11:59
  Speaker 1: I think he's a very funny character. It's self-deprecating, usually. Usually, yeah.
• 1:12:03
  Speaker 1: Or it's just being horribly mean and aggressive. Yeah. They're
• 1:12:07
  Speaker 1: not zingers. Not really. No. Anyway. What did we learn, Palmer?
• 1:12:12
  Speaker 1: What did you learn from the episode, Dando? Oh, what
• 1:12:14
  Speaker 1: did I learn from the episode? I learned that Alan
• 1:12:17
  Speaker 1: was a judge on American Idol. I had no idea.
• 1:12:20
  Speaker 1: I had completely forgotten about that. Yeah, that's a very
• 1:12:24
  Speaker 1: good point. Mine is also Idol related. Don't trust Simon Cowell. No,
• 1:12:27
  Speaker 1: I never trust Simon Cowell. Don't trust a man with
• 1:12:29
  Speaker 1: a face like that. Have you seen his face lately?
• 1:12:30
  Speaker 1: It's weird. What the hell happened? I don't know. What's
• 1:12:33
  Speaker 1: to appear young again? Keep that gravy train rolling. From
• 1:12:37
  Speaker 1: this day forward, your names will be.
• 1:12:40
  Speaker 4: It is the final Guy Davis New Name Championship for
• 1:12:43
  Speaker 4: Season 21. We finally got here. We're about to actually
• 1:12:46
  Speaker 4: announce the winner.
• 1:12:47
  Speaker 1: Officially. Announce the winner. Yes.
• 1:12:51
  Speaker 4: The current leaderboard, though, stands at this. In first position,
• 1:12:53
  Speaker 4: Philip J. Hawkins on 24 points. In second position, Nathan
• 1:12:56
  Speaker 4: Briggs on 17 points. And in third position, we have
• 1:12:59
  Speaker 4: Mike Salter and Clever Kyle, both on 15 points.
• 1:13:02
  Speaker 1: Take it away. Are we going to double up points
• 1:13:04
  Speaker 1: for this episode? No, no. We're just going to go
• 1:13:05
  Speaker 1: with the regulars. One, two, three. Okay. Well, in that case,
• 1:13:08
  Speaker 1: one point goes to Don't have a cowl, man. I
• 1:13:13
  Speaker 1: like that. That's actually pretty good. That is Mike Salter,
• 1:13:15
  Speaker 1: which means he ends on 16 points in third position
• 1:13:19
  Speaker 1: so far. Nice and salty. Two points goes to Judge Dregs.
• 1:13:26
  Speaker 1: Judge Dregs? Interesting, because I was asking you about Judge
• 1:13:28
  Speaker 1: Dregs recently, wasn't I? You were indeed, yes.
• 1:13:31
  Speaker 4: Adam Woolhouse gets the two points there, which puts him
• 1:13:34
  Speaker 4: on 14 points. Adam Woolhouse in the.
• 1:13:36
  Speaker 1: Top five there. Good job. Welcome to the Woolhouse. You
• 1:13:40
  Speaker 1: say that every time. Then you confuse yourself. Why did
• 1:13:41
  Speaker 1: I say that? Yeah, why? Why did I say that?
• 1:13:46
  Speaker 1: Time to put me in the home. But three points
• 1:13:48
  Speaker 1: goes to American Idol. American Idol, also very good. Who
• 1:13:57
  Speaker 1: is it? Who do you reckon it is? Is it PJH? No,
• 1:14:00
  Speaker 1: it's Jack McFadden. Oh, wow. Jack. Just a sneaky three-pointer
• 1:14:04
  Speaker 1: to end the season. Well done, Jack. Whoosh. Whoosh. Call me.
• 1:14:11
  Speaker 1: Or should we say, I don't know, Sophie Cunningham or
• 1:14:12
  Speaker 1: something like that. Let's get ourselves embroiled in some culture wars.
• 1:14:15
  Speaker 1: Let's do it, yes. Another three points goes to Jack McFadden.
• 1:14:19
  Speaker 1: Well done.
• 1:14:20
  Speaker 4: So that means the winner is officially Philip J. Hawkins again.
• 1:14:25
  Speaker 1: P-J-H. Well done. Well done, Philip J. Hawkins. And look,
• 1:14:28
  Speaker 1: we need to reiterate this. We say it all the time,
• 1:14:31
  Speaker 1: but we just need to make it clear. We're not
• 1:14:33
  Speaker 1: in the pocket of Philip J. Hawkins or anything like that.
• 1:14:35
  Speaker 1: We do this blind. Well, I just picked the names
• 1:14:38
  Speaker 1: that I think are best. It just so happens that
• 1:14:40
  Speaker 1: Philip J. Hawkins and I share one mind. I reckon
• 1:14:43
  Speaker 1: that guy is actually Philip J. Hawkins. I'm out of here.
• 1:14:49
  Speaker 1: Damn it. My evil scheme revealed.
• 1:14:51
  Speaker 4: But second position, Nathan Briggs on 17 and Mike Salter
• 1:14:54
  Speaker 4: on 16 points outright.
• 1:14:56
  Speaker 1: Third, well done, guys.
• 1:14:57
  Speaker 4: Now, everyone who didn't finish first, anyone who's not Phil J. Hawkins,
• 1:15:00
  Speaker 4: will go into the wildcard draw and will draw that
• 1:15:02
  Speaker 4: winner during our Season 21 wrap-up show.
• 1:15:05
  Speaker 1: All right. It should be a lot of fun.
• 1:15:07
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:15:08
  Speaker 1: What does PJ Edge win? He gets the free tier
• 1:15:13
  Speaker 1: for the next season. Oh, yeah. Good for him.
• 1:15:15
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:15:16
  Speaker 1: Okay, then cool. What a prize. Yes, what a prize indeed.
• 1:15:21
  Speaker 1: That's great. No, no, good for him. And we're happy
• 1:15:23
  Speaker 1: to have you around.
• 1:15:24
  Speaker 5: Yes, indeed.
• 1:15:24
  Speaker 1: Yeah, to keep giving us cool new names. All righty.
• 1:15:27
  Speaker 4: So make sure you guys be a part of the
• 1:15:29
  Speaker 4: Guy Davis New Name Championship for season 22. I can't
• 1:15:32
  Speaker 4: believe we're up to season 22 now.
• 1:15:34
  Speaker 1: Wow.
• 1:15:34
  Speaker 4: So we padded this season out real long. We threw
• 1:15:36
  Speaker 4: in a couple of classic reviews. We threw in some
• 1:15:38
  Speaker 4: news episodes. We threw in some mailbag ones.
• 1:15:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah, we had some guests on. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, let's
• 1:15:42
  Speaker 1: keep doing that.
• 1:15:43
  Speaker 4: I was about to say tapper, tapper, tapper.
• 1:15:49
  Speaker 1: That's not right. No, no, no, no, no. Well, this
• 1:15:51
  Speaker 1: is the thing.
• 1:15:52
  Speaker 4: I'm going to make a video about things that kids
• 1:15:54
  Speaker 4: who grew up in the 90s say and kids who
• 1:15:56
  Speaker 4: grew up in the 90s understand. But anyone under the
• 1:15:58
  Speaker 4: age of 25 now would go, what the fuck are
• 1:16:00
  Speaker 4: you doing? So we went to play golf the other day, right?
• 1:16:02
  Speaker 4: And there was this young kid, I don't know, he
• 1:16:04
  Speaker 4: was about 15.
• 1:16:05
  Speaker 1: And I was like, just tap it, just tap, tap, tap,
• 1:16:07
  Speaker 1: tap it. And he looked at me like, what is
• 1:16:09
  Speaker 1: wrong with you? I'm like, Oh, shit, that movie's 30
• 1:16:12
  Speaker 1: years old. You don't know Happy New Year. Yeah, and
• 1:16:15
  Speaker 1: then there's another one that's like, you know, you can
• 1:16:17
  Speaker 1: do it! You know, Rob Schneider and the Waterboy. It's like,
• 1:16:20
  Speaker 1: why would anyone under the age of 25 know what
• 1:16:21
  Speaker 1: that means? That's correct. It's like me going, you know... Hey! Yeah,
• 1:16:28
  Speaker 1: it's like... Who is Fonzie? What is a Fonzie?
• 1:16:32
  Speaker 4: But thank you guys for all of your support here
• 1:16:33
  Speaker 4: at Four Finger Discount. Look out for the Season 21
• 1:16:36
  Speaker 4: wrap-up in the next couple of weeks.
• 1:16:38
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah.
• 1:16:38
  Speaker 4: We're going to be doing a mailbag episode as well,
• 1:16:40
  Speaker 4: so keep sending your questions through mailbag at fourfingerdiscount.com.au. You
• 1:16:43
  Speaker 4: want to make this the biggest mailbag episode of all time,
• 1:16:46
  Speaker 4: so send through all your questions, mailbag at fourfingerdiscount.com.au. And
• 1:16:51
  Speaker 4: if you are listening to this on the free feed,
• 1:16:52
  Speaker 4: and you do have a couple of spare dollar-y do's
• 1:16:54
  Speaker 4: in your pocket, we would appreciate your support on Patreon.
• 1:16:56
  Speaker 4: Help get the lights on here at fourfingerdiscount.com. So Davis though,
• 1:17:00
  Speaker 4: any final words for season 21?
• 1:17:03
  Speaker 1: Well, we hope you've enjoyed this episode and this season
• 1:17:05
  Speaker 1: of Four Finger Discount, the podcast where we share our
• 1:17:08
  Speaker 1: hilarious hate with everyone.