Latest / Relatables / EP 42 - ALL MEN WANT IS SEX!?

Transcript

EP 42 - ALL MEN WANT IS SEX!? · Relatables

0:00
Speaker 1: Just because your girlfriend doesn't want to have sex with
0:02
Speaker 1: you every fucking day doesn't mean they don't love you
0:04
Speaker 1: and they're not sexually attracted to you. Hormones, bro! Think
0:08
Speaker 1: about shit. What the fuck is wrong with you? How
0:11
Speaker 1: old are they? I have a hot take maybe. If
0:14
Speaker 1: you're with someone and you don't know their password, is
0:18
Speaker 1: that a red? I think that's a red flag. I
0:20
Speaker 1: have this underlying guilt that I've slept with one of
0:23
Speaker 1: my best guy friends in the past who my current
0:26
Speaker 1: partner has become really close with.
0:39
Speaker 2: The Relatables Podcast is hosted by myself, Odi Clark, a.k.a.
0:42
Speaker 1: My man.
0:43
Speaker 2: And my partner in crime, Mr. Jake Craig, a.k.a.
0:46
Speaker 1: Daddy. That is I.
0:48
Speaker 2: And everyone listening, you guys are the baddies.
0:51
Speaker 1: Yes, you are.
0:52
Speaker 2: Jake, to start.
0:54
Speaker 1: Mm.
0:55
Speaker 2: I've got a doozy.
0:58
Speaker 1: What even is a doozy?
0:59
Speaker 2: I don't know.
1:00
Speaker 1: Is it a big one?
1:01
Speaker 2: Like a big shit? Like a big one?
1:04
Speaker 1: Like if I said, someone said, how was your poop?
1:08
Speaker 1: And I said, it was a doozy. Or how was
1:10
Speaker 1: your day? Oh, it was a doozy. How was your flight? Oh,
1:14
Speaker 1: it was a doozy.
1:15
Speaker 2: I feel like it has so many contexts.
1:17
Speaker 1: You could use doozy for anything. Bad.
1:19
Speaker 2: And then also like a lot or big.
1:22
Speaker 1: Doozy of an episode. Yeah, like doozy. What's doozy? There's
1:26
Speaker 1: a lot going on. It's like in Australia, we have
1:28
Speaker 1: this one, fair dinkum.
1:30
Speaker 2: No one says that though.
1:31
Speaker 1: People say fair dinkum.
1:32
Speaker 2: I don't know about that.
1:33
Speaker 1: The most common time I say fair dinkum in two situations.
1:37
Speaker 1: I say fair dinkum in as if I'm saying like,
1:40
Speaker 1: are you serious? Someone says something crazy and I go,
1:42
Speaker 1: fair dinkum.
1:43
Speaker 2: Why is that kind of giving me the ick vibe?
1:44
Speaker 1: Fair dinkum. Or I'll say, or if someone says to me,
1:48
Speaker 1: are you serious? I'll be like, fair dinkum. I feel like,
1:54
Speaker 1: And by the way, it's fair, like F-A-I-R, to people
1:57
Speaker 1: that probably can't understand my accent. Or like, I'm saying
2:00
Speaker 1: it really quick. And then dinkum. Fair dinkum. I don't
2:03
Speaker 1: know where that came from.
2:05
Speaker 2: Fair dinkum, I feel like also sounds like something I
2:07
Speaker 2: would say if I actually don't care. Like if someone
2:10
Speaker 2: told me like an interesting fact they thought was interesting,
2:12
Speaker 2: I was like, oh, fair dinkum. I don't give a fuck. Yeah, yeah.
2:15
Speaker 1: So many uses. It's versatile. Fair dinkum.
2:18
Speaker 2: Anyway, this is a fair dinkum doozy, Jake. There you go.
2:21
Speaker 1: Love it.
2:22
Speaker 2: I saw this on the radio or TikTok. And the
2:26
Speaker 2: caption said, can all the crazy girls comment the most
2:29
Speaker 2: insane thing they've done? Because I want to see if
2:33
Speaker 2: I really am that crazy.
2:35
Speaker 1: Oh, God.
2:36
Speaker 2: Oh, fuck.
2:38
Speaker 1: I'm a little scared.
2:40
Speaker 2: You can understand how I mean when I say doozy.
2:43
Speaker 1: Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, I've always wanted to actually
2:47
Speaker 1: ask as an IG question, like, Have you ever done
2:49
Speaker 1: something just a little crazy? Like genuinely, like no judgment,
2:52
Speaker 1: just a little crazy. Just a little crazy. What's the
2:55
Speaker 1: craziest thing you've done?
2:56
Speaker 2: Just a little crazy. What's the craziest thing I've done?
2:59
Speaker 2: Put me on the spot. Actually, I don't think I'm
3:03
Speaker 2: a very crazy person.
3:04
Speaker 1: Yeah, like, you know, nothing that would mean make someone
3:07
Speaker 1: say like, oh yeah, my ex, oh, he was crazy.
3:09
Speaker 2: Oh, like that context.
3:10
Speaker 1: I assume that's what this is.
3:14
Speaker 2: Technically, it looked like I broke up with my first
3:16
Speaker 2: girlfriend to go to schoolies.
3:19
Speaker 1: Well, are you saying technically because that was the reason?
3:24
Speaker 1: Like what? Like I'm pretty sure that was it.
3:28
Speaker 2: Yes and no. Also just because I wasn't feeling it.
3:31
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
3:32
Speaker 2: But at the time, that's why you broke up. Yeah,
3:34
Speaker 2: I feel like that's... But that's also feel like... I
3:36
Speaker 2: feel like that's not that crazy.
3:39
Speaker 1: Some crazy stuff's happening.
3:40
Speaker 2: What have you done crazy, boy?
3:41
Speaker 1: Craziest thing I've done? Um... I want to say out
3:50
Speaker 1: of spite, I like, I'm trying to think if I've
3:56
Speaker 1: ever done anything social media wise. I don't think I have.
3:59
Speaker 1: But out of spite, once I took back to a
4:02
Speaker 1: girlfriend's house, like I just like left it on the driveway.
4:05
Speaker 1: I took back photos and stuff out of spite.
4:09
Speaker 2: Fair dinkum.
4:10
Speaker 1: I could have just chucked him out. Like I could
4:12
Speaker 1: have just chucked him in the bin if I didn't
4:14
Speaker 1: want him. You're crazy.
4:15
Speaker 2: You're crazy, bro.
4:16
Speaker 1: That's like the most spiteful thing.
4:18
Speaker 2: So you just left her like photos in the driveway.
4:21
Speaker 1: Yeah. And it was like to send a message. And
4:24
Speaker 1: it was to send a message.
4:24
Speaker 2: You know how we're vanilla in the bedroom? What's like
4:27
Speaker 2: the opposite of crazy?
4:27
Speaker 1: Yeah, we're vanilla in the craziness as well. Yeah, we're
4:30
Speaker 1: just like. Like that was just me trying to send
4:32
Speaker 1: a message of like that she had like hurt me.
4:34
Speaker 2: We're Luke warm boys, eh?
4:36
Speaker 1: And then I also don't know what I wanted from
4:37
Speaker 1: it because it's like, What do I want it to
4:39
Speaker 1: be like?
4:39
Speaker 2: You told that like, I was going to be like, fuck,
4:41
Speaker 2: that's fucked.
4:41
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah. What do I want it to do?
4:44
Speaker 1: I feel like that's valid. What do I want it
4:46
Speaker 1: to do? Be like, oh my God, Jake, let's get
4:48
Speaker 1: back together. Like, I just fucking did the most, that's
4:51
Speaker 1: the most spiteful thing that's possible.
4:52
Speaker 2: I wouldn't even say that's spiteful because like, I don't know.
4:54
Speaker 1: But I did it because she hurt me. And so,
4:59
Speaker 1: and so I was like, no, fuck this.
5:01
Speaker 2: Shit, we need to step up our game. We need
5:03
Speaker 2: to be more crazy.
5:04
Speaker 1: What can I do crazy? Oh no, me and Beth
5:05
Speaker 1: have each other's locations. You look... Is that crazy? I
5:11
Speaker 1: don't know. Some people may say.
5:12
Speaker 2: Let's get in an alter ego. If you could do something.
5:14
Speaker 1: Oh, here we go. Craziest thing I've done. One time... Shit,
5:18
Speaker 1: not what? One time... Have I ever?
5:21
Speaker 2: Nah.
5:22
Speaker 1: One time Beth didn't answer the phone, so I checked
5:23
Speaker 1: her location.
5:24
Speaker 2: Oh, shit.
5:26
Speaker 1: I knew she was at work.
5:30
Speaker 2: Okay, alter egos. Alter egos. If you could do something crazy...
5:33
Speaker 2: What would you do Like the craziest thing If like
5:36
Speaker 2: More didn't exist.
5:37
Speaker 1: I would probably I would probably pay someone So this
5:42
Speaker 1: is me like Being crazy Yeah yeah And like I'm
5:44
Speaker 1: crazy Get in there Get crazy yeah yeah I would
5:46
Speaker 1: probably pay someone To Someone that's like So so so
5:52
Speaker 1: So fucking hot Yeah To try and get Beth to
5:55
Speaker 1: cheat on me To see if she would.
5:56
Speaker 2: Cheat Oh Shit that actually is crazy That's.
5:59
Speaker 1: Good Yeah saying that feels good Yeah There's shit.
6:03
Speaker 2: There's people on like TikTok. They get like people who
6:05
Speaker 2: have like millions of followers to DM their girl or boy.
6:08
Speaker 1: Dang.
6:08
Speaker 2: And see if they'll achieve.
6:09
Speaker 1: I'd hate to know what would happen. I actually, you
6:13
Speaker 1: know what's funny is I could do that without feeling stressed.
6:19
Speaker 1: Maybe you are crazy.
6:19
Speaker 2: What would I do? I reckon I could.
6:21
Speaker 1: No, I mean stressed about what she would do. Oh, yeah.
6:23
Speaker 1: I know she wouldn't.
6:24
Speaker 2: I thought you meant like I could 100% like pay
6:26
Speaker 2: that guy and not be stressed.
6:27
Speaker 1: Yeah.
6:29
Speaker 2: Only thing I reckon I could do.
6:31
Speaker 1: Not do, but if I was- No, this is like literally,
6:33
Speaker 1: this is, because I would never do that. Okay. Say
6:35
Speaker 1: something that you would never do. Sorry.
6:37
Speaker 2: I would never do- Like go.
6:39
Speaker 1: To bed without brushing your teeth. Shit.
6:41
Speaker 2: I would never do that. GPS tracker on a car.
6:44
Speaker 1: Ah, instead of just like, yo, give me your fucking,
6:47
Speaker 1: give me your, what's your, like give me your location
6:49
Speaker 1: for your safety.
6:49
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's crazy. Instead of that- No, I mean like,
6:52
Speaker 2: I'm mad.
6:53
Speaker 1: Yeah, she doesn't know.
6:54
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm suspecting that.
6:55
Speaker 1: Like she doesn't know that.
6:55
Speaker 2: Yeah.
6:57
Speaker 1: One time, Beth- tried to surprise me at the airport
7:01
Speaker 1: when I got home from Canada. And she was asking
7:04
Speaker 1: me about flight number, when my flight landed and stuff.
7:07
Speaker 1: And I was like, and at this time she didn't
7:08
Speaker 1: have her license, right? So I was like, she's not
7:10
Speaker 1: going to pick me up. But then she's asking these
7:12
Speaker 1: questions and I was like, oh, anyway. And so then I,
7:14
Speaker 1: when I land, obviously my reception comes back, blah, blah, blah.
7:19
Speaker 1: And on text messages, when you have each other's location
7:23
Speaker 1: on just normal text message, right under their name, it'll
7:25
Speaker 1: be like live location, Dromoyne. That's somewhere in Sydney. That's
7:29
Speaker 1: where we lived. Her live location was Sydney Kingsford Smith airport.
7:32
Speaker 1: And I was like this idiot. I know he's, and like,
7:34
Speaker 1: so I just had to try and act surprised. And I,
7:37
Speaker 1: you know what? I've never told her. I feel, I
7:42
Speaker 1: feel bad, but like I was, I just, I wasn't surprised.
7:45
Speaker 2: I knew she was pretty crazy.
7:46
Speaker 1: And I was like, it was an accident.
7:49
Speaker 2: Okay. So can all the crazy girls comment the most
7:52
Speaker 2: insane thing you've done? Because I want to see if
7:54
Speaker 2: I'm really that crazy. Last text I sent was, I'm
7:59
Speaker 2: not aborting it. Before I blocked him on everything and
8:02
Speaker 2: changed my number. I was never pregnant.
8:07
Speaker 1: What's the point? The fear that would go through my, like,
8:12
Speaker 1: I would initially be angry and then I would be like, yeah,
8:15
Speaker 1: but that's my kid. What about, now I want to
8:18
Speaker 1: see my kid. And then you never, ever, ever reply.
8:21
Speaker 2: Nothing you can do about it.
8:22
Speaker 1: But what if he's just as crazy? True.
8:25
Speaker 2: I feel like that's just like, The game's the game
8:27
Speaker 2: at that point because you're both digging yourself a hole.
8:29
Speaker 2: He's got nine months to try and find you.
8:32
Speaker 1: What if he doesn't even work?
8:35
Speaker 2: Imagine he doesn't even care.
8:37
Speaker 1: True.
8:37
Speaker 2: This one could not work. Yeah. And he's like, oh,
8:41
Speaker 2: thank God.
8:42
Speaker 1: He might be like, oh, done the work for me.
8:45
Speaker 1: I was going to block you.
8:46
Speaker 2: Probably if he's a trash dude too.
8:48
Speaker 1: Imagine she sends it. Then she goes and blocks him
8:51
Speaker 1: and stuff. Right. And then she thinks she's got the
8:54
Speaker 1: upper hand here. She's left him stressing. And then little
8:58
Speaker 1: does she know, he sees that message and straight away
8:59
Speaker 1: just blocks her and doesn't want any more messages.
9:03
Speaker 2: They would have been perfect for each other then.
9:04
Speaker 1: Okay.
9:06
Speaker 2: Deleted his entire 14 year World of Warcraft account. You
9:12
Speaker 2: can't even get that shit back after you deleted it.
9:15
Speaker 1: See, to me, that's like, to me, I'm like, who cares?
9:19
Speaker 1: But I think I, because, but it must be 14 years.
9:23
Speaker 1: And so he has to start from zero or something again.
9:25
Speaker 1: I've seen a video of this guy had like a,
9:30
Speaker 1: he had this NBA, 2K NBA, whatever game that he
9:34
Speaker 1: just had this wicked team on or some shit. I
9:37
Speaker 1: don't know. Anyway, his wife snaps the disc or some shit. Anyway,
9:41
Speaker 1: something like that. This guy lost it. And he's like,
9:46
Speaker 1: we're getting a divorce. Like she did it just for
9:48
Speaker 1: a funny video.
9:49
Speaker 2: Oh, really?
9:49
Speaker 1: And then he's like, I'm divorcing you and I'm suing you. Yeah.
9:53
Speaker 1: He's like, that he's like, babe, that was my life.
9:57
Speaker 1: He's like, no, babe, that was our living. That was
10:00
Speaker 1: how he made the money.
10:01
Speaker 2: Oh really?
10:02
Speaker 1: And he's like, no, babe, you don't understand. That was
10:04
Speaker 1: our life. Not just my life. That was.
10:08
Speaker 2: That's how he makes money.
10:09
Speaker 1: And I was like, she clearly had no clue what
10:12
Speaker 1: he did.
10:13
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like our girlfriend's coming in here and like
10:15
Speaker 2: stomping on our roadcast of what we record on.
10:18
Speaker 1: But like, not really because we can fucking just get
10:20
Speaker 1: a new one. True, actually.
10:21
Speaker 2: Good point.
10:22
Speaker 1: I can't even imagine what it would be like.
10:24
Speaker 2: Like a month's worth or more of our files or something.
10:27
Speaker 1: It's like, the only thing I can think of is like...
10:29
Speaker 1: Them somehow logging into accounts, deleting everything for good. True.
10:33
Speaker 1: And then we have to restart on, you know, Instagram, TikTok, Spotify,
10:37
Speaker 1: like restarting on all those. You know what though? It
10:41
Speaker 1: would be tough.
10:42
Speaker 2: I would be livid.
10:43
Speaker 1: I'd be livid. I'd be livid, obviously. We'd break up
10:45
Speaker 1: with them.
10:45
Speaker 2: If it was a joke, I'd be fucking.
10:46
Speaker 1: Break up with them, obviously, right? But I would restart. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
10:51
Speaker 1: And I would be like, oh, cool. It kind of
10:53
Speaker 1: feels like cool to start from zero with all this knowledge.
10:55
Speaker 2: True.
10:56
Speaker 1: But I would break up with them.
10:57
Speaker 2: Good mindset.
10:57
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
10:58
Speaker 2: Especially how much it meant to us. Fucking hell. Okay.
11:01
Speaker 2: I peed on all his clothes.
11:04
Speaker 1: I kind of think that's funny.
11:06
Speaker 2: Gross.
11:07
Speaker 1: Gross. Disgusting. But funny.
11:08
Speaker 2: Seeing your ex pop a squat just on all your
11:12
Speaker 2: clean clothes.
11:13
Speaker 1: Puts a pile. Like, I think it would be so
11:15
Speaker 1: funny if you just broke up with someone, terrible breakup,
11:18
Speaker 1: put all their clothes in a bag, piss in the bag,
11:21
Speaker 1: throw it out a window or something, be like, your
11:22
Speaker 1: clothes are there. When they get home, they open it up,
11:24
Speaker 1: disgusting smell of ammonia, piss.
11:26
Speaker 2: Are you throwing that out?
11:27
Speaker 1: Oh, obviously, yeah. You chuck it out. And just, like,
11:30
Speaker 1: to me, for some reason, I find that funny. That
11:32
Speaker 1: would feel amazing.
11:33
Speaker 2: Wouldn't it at the time, though?
11:34
Speaker 1: That would feel amazing.
11:35
Speaker 2: Oh, we had a friend, actually. He used to work
11:37
Speaker 2: at McDonald's. And I can't remember the exact situation, but basically...
11:43
Speaker 2: him no he slept with a girl who'd broken up
11:46
Speaker 2: with her boyfriend they weren't really broken up but they
11:49
Speaker 2: were technically it wasn't in the wrong but he probably
11:51
Speaker 2: shouldn't have been sleeping with her and the dude went
11:54
Speaker 2: and cheeseburgered his car while he was working at maccas
12:02
Speaker 2: that's funny see that's cool all along the front windscreen
12:05
Speaker 2: that's cool yeah i think that's cool And we were
12:08
Speaker 2: all like 17 at the time.
12:12
Speaker 1: That's cool. That's the type of vandalism I want.
12:15
Speaker 2: Okay. I went by his place after our breakup and
12:18
Speaker 2: stood outside his window because my phone was connected to
12:21
Speaker 2: his Roku TV and kept changing his shows. I did
12:25
Speaker 2: it for three months.
12:28
Speaker 1: Three months? Yes.
12:30
Speaker 2: Imagine seeing your ex just out the window, and then
12:33
Speaker 2: you're like.
12:34
Speaker 1: What the fuck is she doing? He must have known, though.
12:38
Speaker 2: No.
12:38
Speaker 1: Because he must have been wigging. That's 60,000 likes. Also,
12:41
Speaker 1: here's my thing. If I'm watching that thing, I assume
12:46
Speaker 1: a Roku TV is like an Apple TV or something.
12:49
Speaker 1: After a week of me wigging out, being like, why? Honestly,
12:54
Speaker 1: after two days, dead set, after two days, I'm getting
12:57
Speaker 1: a new one. True. Three months?
13:00
Speaker 2: I swear some of those streaming services though, like you
13:02
Speaker 2: go on there and it takes you back to like
13:04
Speaker 2: season one, episode three.
13:06
Speaker 1: Yeah.
13:07
Speaker 2: And I don't click, like I don't blink an eye
13:09
Speaker 2: at it.
13:10
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a good point. I assume she's talking about
13:13
Speaker 1: changing the TV show while he's watching it.
13:15
Speaker 2: True, maybe.
13:16
Speaker 1: Yeah, clock that. I would change brands too. Because my
13:20
Speaker 1: Apple TV, bougie. You use the Apple TV remote and
13:24
Speaker 1: it turns on the whole TV. And even for a
13:27
Speaker 1: little while, it was controlling the volume, but now it
13:28
Speaker 1: doesn't anymore. I don't know why. I missed that. But anyway,
13:31
Speaker 1: I assumed she could turn his whole ass TV on
13:34
Speaker 1: with her phone.
13:34
Speaker 2: Probably.
13:35
Speaker 1: So you could freak them the fuck out.
13:38
Speaker 2: Middle of the night?
13:39
Speaker 1: 2 a.m. Yeah. Turn it on blaring.
13:41
Speaker 2: Not bad, eh?
13:42
Speaker 1: That'd be terrifying.
13:44
Speaker 2: That would be.
13:44
Speaker 1: I'd move out. That'd give me to move out. Really? Yeah,
13:47
Speaker 1: I'd be thinking, I'll.
13:47
Speaker 2: Just unplug the TV.
13:48
Speaker 1: Oh, yeah. That's a good point. But I'd still think
13:52
Speaker 1: it's haunted.
13:53
Speaker 3: Yeah.
13:53
Speaker 1: That doesn't mean I don't think it's haunted.
13:55
Speaker 2: I signed him up for Jehovah's Witness visits because he
13:58
Speaker 2: needed to find Jesus for all the hell he put
14:01
Speaker 2: me through.
14:02
Speaker 1: That's pretty, that's genius.
14:04
Speaker 2: That's creative.
14:05
Speaker 1: That's genius. I like that. I reckon people need to
14:10
Speaker 1: do more of that.
14:11
Speaker 2: Craziest thing I did was let, if I can't say this,
14:13
Speaker 2: craziest thing I did was let shit slide.
14:17
Speaker 1: What's that mean? As in like, did she poo on
14:20
Speaker 1: his car or something?
14:21
Speaker 2: No, no, no, no, no. You're taking it too literally.
14:23
Speaker 1: Oh.
14:23
Speaker 2: Like, the craziest thing she did in the relationship.
14:24
Speaker 1: Was let all the shit he did slide. Ah, fair. Yeah,
14:28
Speaker 1: you could be that form of crazy. That's the type
14:30
Speaker 1: of crazy. Because I would be like, you're fucking crazy
14:33
Speaker 1: for putting up with this. Fair.
14:35
Speaker 2: Okay, would you do this one if you suspected your
14:37
Speaker 2: partner was cheating?
14:38
Speaker 1: Okay, go on.
14:39
Speaker 2: Dusted for fingerprints on his phone screen when he was
14:42
Speaker 2: sleeping so I could figure out the password.
14:44
Speaker 1: Oh, my God.
14:47
Speaker 2: Get some, like, baby powder out or some flour or something.
14:49
Speaker 1: Ch-ch-ch. What? Wait, I have a hot take maybe. If
14:55
Speaker 1: you're with someone and you don't know their password, I
14:59
Speaker 1: think that's a red flag.
15:01
Speaker 2: I reckon after like six months of dating.
15:02
Speaker 1: I think if you're with someone, you should know their password.
15:04
Speaker 2: I always forget.
15:05
Speaker 1: I free up my password to anyone. Yeah, you do.
15:08
Speaker 1: I don't care. Like I only have a password on
15:10
Speaker 1: my phone because I like the Apple one. True. And
15:14
Speaker 1: you have to have a password.
15:14
Speaker 2: Oh, do you?
15:15
Speaker 1: I've put Beth's face on my phone. You can have
15:17
Speaker 1: more than one face. You can have two faces. Yeah, bro.
15:19
Speaker 2: I don't know that.
15:19
Speaker 1: I put her face on that shit. How can I actually?
15:20
Speaker 2: It's a big red flag.
15:21
Speaker 1: You know what's so funny is Beth goes on my
15:23
Speaker 1: phone all the time, right? And she'll go on it
15:25
Speaker 1: and she'll be like, can I have your phone? And
15:27
Speaker 1: I'll just be like, yeah, yeah, cool. And she'll go,
15:28
Speaker 1: just try it. I'm just going to go snoop. She'll
15:30
Speaker 1: be like, I'm just going to go snoop as a joke. Yeah.
15:32
Speaker 1: But like my heart skips a beat when she says it.
15:36
Speaker 1: My heart still skips a beat.
15:38
Speaker 2: What do people do who don't share their passwords if
15:40
Speaker 2: they're driving, he's driving, say, and then she goes, can
15:42
Speaker 2: I change the song? And she goes, what's your password?
15:44
Speaker 1: And he goes, nah. He's like, hey Siri, next song.
15:47
Speaker 2: He's like, I got you, babe.
15:49
Speaker 1: Don't worry about it.
15:50
Speaker 2: Password to princess, relax.
15:52
Speaker 1: I think red flag if you don't know each other's
15:54
Speaker 1: passwords to your phone.
15:55
Speaker 2: Yeah, six months?
15:57
Speaker 1: Fuck that, earlier.
15:58
Speaker 2: Really?
15:59
Speaker 1: Who cares?
16:00
Speaker 2: I don't know. I feel like it's the new age
16:03
Speaker 2: of sharing a kiddie house. The phone password is.
16:06
Speaker 1: That's crazy. No, it's not. No, it's not. What's on
16:09
Speaker 1: your phone that's so like... Nothing.
16:11
Speaker 2: I feel like it's a stage in the relationship. Just like,
16:13
Speaker 2: I don't know.
16:13
Speaker 1: Here's my password. I trust you. I think you should
16:17
Speaker 1: do it. Beth probably knew my password from... But like
16:20
Speaker 1: I was saying, I free that shit up like nothing.
16:22
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah. See, you don't value it.
16:23
Speaker 1: Yeah.
16:24
Speaker 2: Like if you dropped your phone on the street, you're probably.
16:26
Speaker 1: Like, hey bro, like my password's fucking... The actually, you
16:28
Speaker 1: know what's annoying is like I have such trust in society.
16:31
Speaker 1: I shouldn't have this much trust in society, but I do.
16:33
Speaker 1: Is that I'd be annoyed If I lost my phone
16:36
Speaker 1: at the gym or something, I'd be like, fuck, I
16:38
Speaker 1: can't believe I have to have a password on that shit.
16:39
Speaker 1: I wish the person could have just like opened it
16:41
Speaker 1: and called me. Just like called the number that was
16:43
Speaker 1: obviously my girlfriend type of thing. Cause I trust that
16:46
Speaker 1: they would. Cause that's what I would do. I would
16:48
Speaker 1: try and get in a phone.
16:48
Speaker 2: I don't understand how some people don't have like, or
16:52
Speaker 2: believe in like bad juju or anything like that.
16:56
Speaker 1: I'm crazy.
16:57
Speaker 2: Yeah.
16:57
Speaker 1: I'm like the biggest hypocrite. I don't know if this
16:58
Speaker 1: is hypocritical or not, but I don't believe in God.
17:00
Speaker 2: Yeah.
17:01
Speaker 1: But, like, I'm scared of karma.
17:03
Speaker 2: Yeah, karma.
17:03
Speaker 1: Yeah.
17:05
Speaker 2: I've never understood this. So where we live is the
17:07
Speaker 2: only GYG that leaves, like, if you order online, the takeaway,
17:11
Speaker 2: the bags there, and you can just go up and look,
17:12
Speaker 2: Audi number 33, go pick it up. Every other GYG
17:16
Speaker 2: across Australia I've been, they hide them behind the counter
17:18
Speaker 2: because people must steal them.
17:19
Speaker 1: Yeah, bro.
17:20
Speaker 2: I'm like, what happened to, like, fucking honesty and shit, man?
17:23
Speaker 1: No, I think it's because that GYG is the busiest
17:25
Speaker 1: GYG ever.
17:26
Speaker 2: Or they don't have the hands to do it. I
17:28
Speaker 2: honestly reckon that GYG is a busy GYG in the country.
17:29
Speaker 2: I thought it was because they lived in such a
17:30
Speaker 2: nice place.
17:33
Speaker 1: Erina?
17:33
Speaker 2: I feel like it's pretty.
17:34
Speaker 1: If it was Gosford, I'd say no. I feel like
17:36
Speaker 1: Erina's pretty good. Erina's like a fucking... The suburb adjacent
17:40
Speaker 1: to Gosford, is it not?
17:41
Speaker 2: Be like on the scheme of like where those restaurants are.
17:45
Speaker 1: Yeah, no. No, look, I'd agree with that. Yeah. I
17:47
Speaker 1: would probably leave like my windows and stuff unlocked in Erina.
17:49
Speaker 1: Maybe not my front door, but windows.
17:51
Speaker 2: No. It'd be crazy. I would love to know how
17:53
Speaker 2: many people like leave their doors unlocked.
17:56
Speaker 1: At night?
17:56
Speaker 2: From like an educational standpoint, not because.
17:59
Speaker 1: I want to. I was going to say why. At night?
18:02
Speaker 1: Or during?
18:03
Speaker 2: At night when they go to sleep.
18:04
Speaker 1: Yeah?
18:05
Speaker 2: Or when they leave too?
18:06
Speaker 1: I lock mine.
18:08
Speaker 2: I don't. Yeah, you lock yours and you fucking like,
18:10
Speaker 2: I feel like. Getting to your house.
18:11
Speaker 1: Is like hard. Oh no, you'd be too scared to
18:13
Speaker 1: go to my house.
18:14
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like a massive long driveway.
18:16
Speaker 1: I just like have this habit of locking it.
18:18
Speaker 2: I thought it was because your door didn't close.
18:19
Speaker 1: So, well, that's why I'm in a habit of like
18:21
Speaker 1: every time I close the door, fling, flick.
18:22
Speaker 2: If I say I'm going to forget something, I'm going
18:24
Speaker 2: to fucking knock.
18:24
Speaker 1: Yeah, I know. It is annoying. It's because the door
18:28
Speaker 1: is a sliding door and whenever you, it's so weird.
18:31
Speaker 1: You go all the way close and it just goes,
18:33
Speaker 1: opens like, I don't know.
18:35
Speaker 2: I literally thought it was just because of that.
18:36
Speaker 1: Well, that's why I do it. But then I'm in
18:38
Speaker 1: a habit for some reason at night now. I don't
18:40
Speaker 1: know why. It's like I'm scared of the dark.
18:41
Speaker 2: I heard a scary noise the other day and like
18:43
Speaker 2: for the past three weeks I've been doing it.
18:46
Speaker 1: Yeah, valid.
18:47
Speaker 2: To be fair, like I've seen TikToks of like people
18:50
Speaker 2: like sending videos or showing videos on TikTok at the beach.
18:54
Speaker 2: Everyone just has their stuff there.
18:56
Speaker 1: In Australia.
18:57
Speaker 2: You can't do that elsewhere.
18:58
Speaker 1: Really?
18:59
Speaker 2: Yeah, you can't leave your shit on the beach because
19:00
Speaker 2: people will just, pickpockets and shit will just, I guess
19:02
Speaker 2: they're not called pickpockets. They're just called stealers. Steal everything.
19:04
Speaker 1: They're just thieves.
19:05
Speaker 2: Yeah, thieves.
19:05
Speaker 1: They're just thieves. Yeah, in Australia, you can just leave
19:08
Speaker 1: your phone, your towel, everything where you were sitting. If
19:11
Speaker 1: you wrap it in a towel, it's invisible. My security
19:14
Speaker 1: is that I wrap my phone in my shirt at
19:15
Speaker 1: the beach and I leave it there and you could fucking.
19:19
Speaker 2: I walk along the two-kilometer beach and leave my phone there.
19:23
Speaker 1: Shoes get left at the entrance of the beach. Never
19:25
Speaker 1: bring them down. Shoes get left at the entrance and
19:26
Speaker 1: then where you go down and sit, if you're going
19:28
Speaker 1: for a swim or a walk, everything stays. And the
19:31
Speaker 1: only reason I actually put my phone wrapped in a
19:33
Speaker 1: shirt is because I don't want the sun to overheat it.
19:35
Speaker 2: Yeah, and the sand. Maybe we do need to give
19:37
Speaker 2: it a little bit.
19:38
Speaker 1: Bro, we live in a fucking good place. So you
19:40
Speaker 1: can't do that everywhere else.
19:42
Speaker 2: No, no.
19:42
Speaker 1: That's so naive of me.
19:44
Speaker 2: Yeah, have you not seen the videos? There's heaps of
19:45
Speaker 2: videos online of it. like the trust australians have in like.
19:48
Speaker 1: Oh yeah people americans in that wig out about that
19:51
Speaker 1: yeah my old boss i say that my old boss
19:53
Speaker 1: he he said that in london if you had stuff
19:57
Speaker 1: in the back of a ute without a cover if
20:00
Speaker 1: you had tools and stuff in the middle of traffic
20:03
Speaker 1: you're driving people would get out steal it and then.
20:06
Speaker 2: Run really well you're That's crazy.
20:10
Speaker 1: And he said, yeah, like you unheard of. Everyone has
20:13
Speaker 1: Vans there.
20:14
Speaker 2: I'm a big believer in karma. It's coming back to karma.
20:16
Speaker 2: I don't know how people can like steal something and
20:18
Speaker 2: then go home and go to sleep.
20:22
Speaker 1: I believe in karma for good people. Good karma. No, no.
20:27
Speaker 1: But I believe like, I believe if a good person
20:29
Speaker 1: does a bad thing, they get bad karma. But if
20:32
Speaker 1: a bad person does a bad thing, for some reason,
20:35
Speaker 1: I don't think that they get bad karma.
20:37
Speaker 2: If they've done so many bad things i've.
20:39
Speaker 1: Always said karma's just like i can't even keep up
20:41
Speaker 1: bro i.
20:42
Speaker 2: Reckon the world has like a funny way of working
20:44
Speaker 2: things out and like for them to be stealing something.
20:47
Speaker 1: Like i don't know bro like donald trump's the fucking
20:49
Speaker 1: president this guy's got the nuclear fucking codes and he
20:53
Speaker 1: literally somehow is making it so the epstein files don't
20:57
Speaker 1: get released and it's in there there is dead set
21:00
Speaker 1: there is proof of him being like a fourth kitty
21:03
Speaker 1: fiddler in there it's insane but i can't he's not
21:06
Speaker 1: getting calm i can't no no but you don't know
21:08
Speaker 1: i don't i don't think i can say that donald
21:10
Speaker 1: trump looks healthy so and like he feels good in
21:14
Speaker 1: life like i love his karma he i reckon.
21:17
Speaker 2: I reckon i reckon i reckon he looks like he
21:18
Speaker 2: struggles to like get through life like and he's unhealthy
21:21
Speaker 2: and unfit and like he probably goes home and he's
21:23
Speaker 2: like like that's what he looks like to me and
21:27
Speaker 2: like that's his karma yeah He hasn't been caught with
21:30
Speaker 2: all this shit he's done, but I feel like calm.
21:32
Speaker 2: The world always has a funny way of working things out, man,
21:34
Speaker 2: I reckon. I don't reckon he's going home being like, fuck,
21:37
Speaker 2: I feel like a beast. That was a beast day.
21:39
Speaker 1: Yeah, there's no way he sits down with the family like,
21:42
Speaker 1: I love you guys. Yeah, no. Like, you guys are
21:45
Speaker 1: the best.
21:45
Speaker 2: Yeah, his relationships in his life, I can't say that
21:48
Speaker 2: that would be good.
21:48
Speaker 1: Yeah.
21:54
Speaker 2: Jake, we're back again with our brand new segment, Nostalgia,
21:57
Speaker 2: where we talk about something nostalgic whilst eating something nostalgic.
22:00
Speaker 1: Yes, of course. And this week, we will be eating
22:03
Speaker 1: none other than Krispy Kreme donuts, the most nostalgic thing. Yes.
22:07
Speaker 1: Take your pick.
22:08
Speaker 2: My highlight of the episode, Jake. I am going for.
22:12
Speaker 1: Actually, I had a cheeky nibble of this one earlier.
22:14
Speaker 1: I'm going to go with this one again.
22:15
Speaker 2: This beautiful one right here. I think it's Biscoff.
22:18
Speaker 1: Biscoff, yum.
22:19
Speaker 2: So, Jake, my turn to ask you a nostalgic question.
22:23
Speaker 1: Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
22:24
Speaker 2: I would like to ask you to go into your
22:28
Speaker 2: memory and tell me about your first kiss with your girlfriend.
22:35
Speaker 1: I actually, the thing about my first kiss with my
22:38
Speaker 1: girlfriend is like, I was gonna do it, I swear,
22:40
Speaker 1: but she did it first.
22:41
Speaker 2: Tell me, tell me.
22:43
Speaker 1: So, it was out of Krispy Kreme. I'm kidding, I'm kidding.
22:49
Speaker 1: I'm kidding. Um, it was actually, it was actually in Sydney.
22:58
Speaker 1: It was on our first date. Yep. Big, I'm big
23:01
Speaker 1: fan of, of, I think got a kiss on the
23:04
Speaker 1: first day.
23:06
Speaker 2: I feel like what if you're unsure?
23:07
Speaker 1: Hmm. Well, Then you probably, like, shouldn't go on another date.
23:14
Speaker 2: It's good if, like, you're both enjoying your time together.
23:17
Speaker 2: You're out here being like, why don't you just kiss me?
23:20
Speaker 2: And she's like, this guy's a fucking creep.
23:22
Speaker 1: Okay, maybe that's the craziest thing I've ever done. Being like,
23:25
Speaker 1: first kiss always has to happen on the first date.
23:28
Speaker 2: Just kiss me.
23:29
Speaker 1: Anyway, okay. Okay. We had just had dinner. And it
23:35
Speaker 1: was going swell. I mean, swimmingly. And so, we were
23:38
Speaker 1: walking down. we should just go and walk to get dessert.
23:42
Speaker 1: And so we were walking.
23:43
Speaker 2: Crispy cream shop?
23:47
Speaker 1: Actually, yeah. But no, we were walking and kind of
23:52
Speaker 1: just being flirty. And this was actually, might I add,
23:56
Speaker 1: so it was like a Friday night, November. So it's
24:00
Speaker 1: getting hot, warm, busy, you know? And so it's like busy,
24:03
Speaker 1: it's Darling Harbour area. And she, we were actually holding hands. Right.
24:11
Speaker 1: Everything was going well. And I was like, Oh my God.
24:14
Speaker 1: And so, and so my thing was like, I'm going
24:17
Speaker 1: to kiss her at the end of the day. Yeah.
24:18
Speaker 1: And I just thought like, I'm not going to like,
24:20
Speaker 1: just do it, you know, middle of the day. I
24:22
Speaker 1: was like, I'm going to do at the end. And I,
24:23
Speaker 1: and at this point I was confident too. So I
24:25
Speaker 1: was like having the best time. Cause I was like,
24:27
Speaker 1: I know I'm going to kiss her. Yeah. But then
24:30
Speaker 1: I don't know what happened. She kind of like, we,
24:33
Speaker 1: we must've been talking and then laughing. And then we
24:36
Speaker 1: were holding hands and then like our, our arms went taut. And, like,
24:41
Speaker 1: the tension kind of went taut. And then she bounced
24:44
Speaker 1: back a bit. And I remember she came in and
24:46
Speaker 1: we just kissed.
24:47
Speaker 3: Slinky.
24:47
Speaker 1: Like, she just came in and she just kissed me.
24:49
Speaker 1: And we kissed and I was like, ooh.
24:50
Speaker 2: What was, like, a peck or, like, actual hookup?
24:53
Speaker 1: It was, like, an in-between. It was kind of, like,
24:55
Speaker 1: a tiny, tiny bit of time.
24:57
Speaker 2: Yeah.
24:58
Speaker 1: So, yeah, and I remember it. And, fuck, you know
25:01
Speaker 1: what's funny is, like, I remember that in detail. What
25:03
Speaker 1: about yours?
25:04
Speaker 2: That's good to be fair.
25:06
Speaker 1: That's a good story.
25:06
Speaker 2: I was in there with you. Like in my mind,
25:09
Speaker 2: I was about to say, when you were telling it, uh,
25:13
Speaker 2: my one as well, Cassie kissed me and we're just
25:18
Speaker 2: both vanilla. I won't say I was going to kiss her,
25:22
Speaker 2: but I'm glad she kissed me. So a lot of
25:25
Speaker 2: people know me and Cassie started talking online. She was
25:27
Speaker 2: traveling Europe and I was where I live on the
25:30
Speaker 2: central coast. And we talked for six weeks, started on
25:33
Speaker 2: the messages, went to FaceTime. And then she ended up
25:36
Speaker 2: coming back to Australia. And she was actually at her parents,
25:39
Speaker 2: which I live near to, which is five minutes from
25:42
Speaker 2: my house. And it was the first time we were
25:44
Speaker 2: going to meet. And we'd had all this tension. And
25:46
Speaker 2: I knew there was such a strong connection there. But
25:49
Speaker 2: then I also had never met this woman in my life.
25:51
Speaker 2: So I was like, fuck, it feels like I should
25:53
Speaker 2: kiss her. But I just don't know if I should.
25:57
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, were you... Were you the same
26:00
Speaker 1: as me, though, thinking, you know, it's going to happen?
26:01
Speaker 2: Yeah, I was like.
26:02
Speaker 1: But you weren't... Were you like, in your head, do
26:04
Speaker 1: I greet with a kiss?
26:05
Speaker 2: Yeah, I wasn't going to greet her with a kiss.
26:07
Speaker 1: You weren't going to? No way. You were like, no, no, no,
26:09
Speaker 1: I'm not doing that.
26:10
Speaker 2: Like, people might think I'm like tall, like good looking, handsome,
26:13
Speaker 2: not that confident with girls.
26:15
Speaker 1: And those first two things, I don't know if people
26:17
Speaker 1: think that.
26:18
Speaker 2: But I walked up to a parent's house, knock on
26:21
Speaker 2: the door, and then... No, the door was open. I
26:24
Speaker 2: just knocked on the side. And then she like.
26:26
Speaker 1: Hey, you should have just walked in, open door policy. Yeah.
26:28
Speaker 2: Peeps her head around and she like sort of like
26:30
Speaker 2: runs to me and puts her arms around her and
26:31
Speaker 2: just gives me the biggest kiss. And like, I was
26:33
Speaker 2: like shitting bricks.
26:34
Speaker 1: Were her parents home?
26:35
Speaker 2: Yeah, they were. And I was like, oh, I was like.
26:37
Speaker 1: Did they watch?
26:38
Speaker 2: No, no, no.
26:38
Speaker 1: Oh, thank God. I was going to say what? No.
26:40
Speaker 2: And then I was like, oh yeah. And then it
26:42
Speaker 2: was good kiss too. And I was like, oh, I
26:44
Speaker 2: told her off. I was like, thank God you did that.
26:46
Speaker 2: I was like, no. tension broken yeah and then after
26:50
Speaker 2: I had to like talk to her dad and she
26:52
Speaker 2: they're in the house it was good it was great
26:53
Speaker 2: and I was like I was like.
26:54
Speaker 1: Dang you met the parents straight up yeah because she'd
26:56
Speaker 1: gone back from Europe and she was like living with yeah.
26:58
Speaker 2: She's like come meet my dad and I was like alright.
27:01
Speaker 1: Hey she knew you were in game from the start
27:03
Speaker 1: one time Beth told me you don't want to be
27:05
Speaker 1: airing any of her dirty laundry it's not really dirty
27:07
Speaker 1: laundry anyway but um she said someone came to pick
27:09
Speaker 1: her up for a date and you know what's funny
27:11
Speaker 1: is like I would say he did the gentlemanly thing.
27:14
Speaker 1: He came and he drove in her driveway and he
27:17
Speaker 1: was going to come up and knock on the door.
27:19
Speaker 1: And she was like, no, no, no, no, no. Ran down,
27:21
Speaker 1: just got in the car and was like, no, don't
27:24
Speaker 1: meet my parents. And I was like, well, I think
27:25
Speaker 1: that he was kind of doing the right thing. 100%.
27:28
Speaker 2: Because to be fair, I like, I don't know. I
27:31
Speaker 2: think we were in that stage of the podcast where
27:33
Speaker 2: like we were talking about like, Hey, you should be
27:35
Speaker 2: a good man. So I had in my head, like,
27:37
Speaker 2: I'll go up and knock on the front door. But
27:39
Speaker 2: like prior to that, I probably wouldn't have done that.
27:42
Speaker 2: Like six months before that.
27:43
Speaker 1: Good thing we fucking talk about this shit.
27:45
Speaker 2: I should have had flowers, man.
27:47
Speaker 1: You didn't even have flowers?
27:49
Speaker 2: That's heinous. I wrote her a book.
27:51
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, sorry, I forgot about that. I got flowers.
27:55
Speaker 1: I feel like I didn't do enough. Anyway, baddies, you've
27:59
Speaker 1: heard it here first. If you are in a relationship
28:01
Speaker 1: or not in a relationship, you can do it with friends.
28:04
Speaker 1: You should grab a box of Krispy Kreme and talk
28:06
Speaker 1: about your first kiss stories.
28:07
Speaker 2: In your relationship, go buy a box of Krispy Kreme
28:09
Speaker 2: and go, what was it like for you the first
28:12
Speaker 2: time we kissed?
28:12
Speaker 1: Imagine it's like, she goes, questionable. Baddies, time for dilemmas.
28:25
Speaker 1: And if you would like to submit a dilemma, it
28:27
Speaker 1: will be in the link in the description. If you
28:29
Speaker 1: want to submit a dilemma that Very likely gets answered.
28:32
Speaker 1: You should go over to Patreon where it's $ 8. 99 a month.
28:34
Speaker 1: And over there, you get your own link for your
28:36
Speaker 1: own dilemmas. Also, what you get is the Monday episodes ad-free.
28:41
Speaker 1: You also get the book club episodes five days early
28:44
Speaker 1: and ad-free. And you get an extra episode every Thursday. Oh,
28:48
Speaker 1: my God. That Spotify doesn't get.
28:51
Speaker 2: Value's insane.
28:52
Speaker 1: Point that out. Okay. I'm in a new relationship and
28:57
Speaker 1: we are going really well. But... All honeymoon phase and
29:02
Speaker 1: in love. But I have this underlying guilt that I've
29:06
Speaker 1: slept with one of my best guy friends in the past,
29:09
Speaker 1: who my current partner has become really close with. Now
29:13
Speaker 1: when his friend, sorry, now when this friend and I
29:16
Speaker 1: slept together, it was a complete mistake. It never happened again.
29:21
Speaker 1: And we have maintained our friendship. We have also kept
29:25
Speaker 1: it on the down low due to having a close
29:27
Speaker 1: social circle. where we don't want people knowing slash treating
29:30
Speaker 1: us differently. Do I tell my partner of the past
29:33
Speaker 1: sexual experience or not necessary because he wasn't in the
29:36
Speaker 1: picture at the time? I'm scared he will pull away.
29:40
Speaker 1: and won't be able to look past it. I also
29:43
Speaker 1: think if he never knows, then will that just be
29:46
Speaker 1: easier too? We all have pasts. What should I do?
29:49
Speaker 1: To be fair, if he never knows, that will just
29:51
Speaker 1: be the easiest. That would be the easiest. That would
29:54
Speaker 1: count on him never knowing.
29:55
Speaker 2: Yeah, 100%. And the problem with this dilemma is the
29:58
Speaker 2: baddie who sent this in is like at the point
30:01
Speaker 2: where she's digging herself a little bit of a hole.
30:04
Speaker 2: And she's like, do I keep digging and never ever
30:06
Speaker 2: talk about it?
30:07
Speaker 1: Yeah.
30:08
Speaker 2: And her past will come out and bite her in
30:10
Speaker 2: the bum or- Question.
30:11
Speaker 1: What? Let's say she tells him and he's like, thank
30:16
Speaker 1: you for telling me. You know, it was in the past.
30:19
Speaker 1: Like it is what it is. But I got to
30:21
Speaker 1: be real with you. I'm not very comfortable with this
30:24
Speaker 1: guy now.
30:25
Speaker 2: I think that's fair.
30:26
Speaker 1: Yeah.
30:27
Speaker 2: Well, I think, I think where I was going with
30:29
Speaker 2: that is because you're still friends with the person you
30:32
Speaker 2: had sex with and he's in the same friendship group,
30:35
Speaker 2: your boyfriend has a right to know. Yes. If it
30:37
Speaker 2: was just a Randy on the street and like, you're
30:40
Speaker 2: not friends or you talk like once a month, once
30:43
Speaker 2: a month, once a year.
30:44
Speaker 1: Yeah.
30:44
Speaker 2: Then I'd be like, yeah, for sure, he doesn't need
30:46
Speaker 2: to know. But because you've maintained this, in quotes, friendship,
30:49
Speaker 2: I think he deserves to know.
30:51
Speaker 1: I would agree with that.
30:52
Speaker 2: Because I couldn't be acting like this nonchalant with this
30:54
Speaker 2: dude knowing like, you guys fucked.
30:57
Speaker 1: It's a hard one, right? Because I would say definitely
31:01
Speaker 1: you need to tell him, right? But another thing I
31:05
Speaker 1: think is... Ignorance is bliss. Well, I think ignorance is
31:08
Speaker 1: obviously bliss, right? But if he's, you know... He's a
31:14
Speaker 1: secure person. I totally get... I would be affected by
31:20
Speaker 1: this personally. I want to fully put that out there.
31:21
Speaker 1: But if he's like a very secure person and he's like,
31:25
Speaker 1: you know, you have no reason to lie. You did
31:27
Speaker 1: it once. It was a mistake. It's never happened again.
31:30
Speaker 1: You maintained your friendship, right? You don't look at him
31:33
Speaker 1: that way at all. That's got to be enough.
31:38
Speaker 2: And I think... If you do that, you've done your part.
31:41
Speaker 1: It would be a little different if maybe it was
31:43
Speaker 1: an ex-boyfriend. Agreed. That you had been with for, you know,
31:47
Speaker 1: a year, two years. All that history.
31:51
Speaker 2: It all comes down to like how the boyfriend in
31:54
Speaker 2: this scenario or how people view sex. Because sex to
31:56
Speaker 2: you and I, I think we're similar in a sense
31:59
Speaker 2: of it's not just sex. It's never just sex. It's
32:02
Speaker 2: almost like there's a connection there. It's playing on the heartstrings.
32:05
Speaker 1: Yeah, I agree. But. what I think is you and
32:10
Speaker 1: the friend that had sex in that moment, you're, you
32:14
Speaker 1: clearly are more than friends, right? Yeah. But you've gone
32:19
Speaker 1: back to fully platonic. Yeah. So it's like, then it
32:23
Speaker 1: was more than sex, but now it was just sex.
32:27
Speaker 2: Yeah. And I mean, I think, yeah, a hundred percent.
32:29
Speaker 2: And I think, so the boyfriend, a lot of men
32:33
Speaker 2: I know just view sex as sex too.
32:35
Speaker 1: Yeah.
32:35
Speaker 2: So he might just be like, oh, Thanks for telling me.
32:37
Speaker 2: I can see you're just platonic now like that. You
32:39
Speaker 2: just had a bit of a fuck. He might go,
32:43
Speaker 2: you know, my friend Stacey, I fucked her.
32:47
Speaker 1: You never know.
32:48
Speaker 2: No, he might go too. Like, you want to have
32:49
Speaker 2: a threesome?
32:50
Speaker 1: Whoa, whoa.
32:52
Speaker 2: I've always wanted two people in the bedroom.
32:53
Speaker 1: He's like, hey, I really like that guy. I would
32:54
Speaker 1: have done it too.
32:56
Speaker 2: I would have done it too. But it's still on
32:57
Speaker 2: the cards.
32:58
Speaker 1: But who knows? You've got to tell him. And his
33:01
Speaker 1: reaction will be everything. His reaction's everything.
33:04
Speaker 2: It's almost like a telltale sign. Is that the right saying, telltale?
33:08
Speaker 1: Is it? Telltale sign.
33:11
Speaker 2: It didn't sound right when it came out.
33:12
Speaker 1: It's almost like it's a telltale. A what?
33:14
Speaker 2: Telltale sign.
33:16
Speaker 1: It's almost like it's a telltale sign.
33:18
Speaker 2: I feel like that's right.
33:19
Speaker 1: Yeah, I would say that.
33:21
Speaker 2: Double T's is fucking me. But if he's actually like
33:24
Speaker 2: a nice guy, even though I think we would take
33:26
Speaker 2: it like, oh shit, but also I could understand and
33:30
Speaker 2: appreciate her telling me and what that means to her
33:31
Speaker 2: to tell me and I could see the bigger picture.
33:33
Speaker 2: It's not a breakup worthy thing for me. It would
33:35
Speaker 2: just be like, oh, thank you for telling me. Now
33:36
Speaker 2: I can act appropriately around him.
33:38
Speaker 1: Yeah, I agree. I think I actually, admittedly, I'd probably
33:42
Speaker 1: act different around him. Yeah. I don't know if there's
33:45
Speaker 1: any need.
33:46
Speaker 2: To act different.
33:47
Speaker 1: Actually, I don't know. I think I'm becoming a much
33:50
Speaker 1: more secure person than I used to be. If I
33:52
Speaker 1: really think about this, it would need to be in
33:53
Speaker 1: the situation, but It's just like, I just don't see
34:02
Speaker 1: it as a big deal. I would have seen it
34:04
Speaker 1: as a huge deal back in the day. I'm telling
34:05
Speaker 1: you that right now. Yeah. But I just don't see
34:07
Speaker 1: it as a big deal.
34:08
Speaker 2: I don't think it's a huge deal, but it's still
34:10
Speaker 2: a deal.
34:11
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's a deal. I think what would bug me
34:13
Speaker 1: the most is that you took so long to tell me. True.
34:16
Speaker 2: She didn't say a time period, did she?
34:17
Speaker 1: Well, she said like it's a new relationship going. It's
34:21
Speaker 1: like they've been honeymoon phase and they're in love, right?
34:24
Speaker 1: So hopefully still fresh. Yeah, it's something you should have
34:31
Speaker 1: said when he met the guy.
34:32
Speaker 2: Yeah.
34:33
Speaker 1: Yeah. Like, after he met the person, you should have
34:38
Speaker 1: been like, oh, by the way. Yeah, yeah.
34:40
Speaker 2: You got to.
34:41
Speaker 1: You have to.
34:42
Speaker 2: But to be fair, like, I could understand, like, she's
34:44
Speaker 2: left it. She's in her own head. And then they've
34:46
Speaker 2: met a couple more times. Now it's too late.
34:48
Speaker 1: And now they're like besties.
34:49
Speaker 2: Yeah.
34:50
Speaker 1: But, like, also, but also no. I can't see that
34:53
Speaker 1: because Beth actually said to me once, she goes, have
34:55
Speaker 1: I ever met anyone you've slept with? Have you told
34:57
Speaker 1: me this yet? And I said, no. And then she said,
35:00
Speaker 1: would you tell me? And then I said, do you
35:04
Speaker 1: want me to tell you if I bump into someone
35:06
Speaker 1: that I'm still friendly with? I'm not friends with anyone
35:10
Speaker 1: I've slept with, but if I see them and say hi,
35:13
Speaker 1: would you want me to tell you? And she was like, yeah.
35:16
Speaker 1: I thought, fair enough. I'll tell you if it ever happens.
35:18
Speaker 2: Do you reckon Beth wants to know on a point
35:22
Speaker 2: of comparison? Or just to know?
35:24
Speaker 1: No, I think she said she wants to know just
35:27
Speaker 1: to know because I don't want to put words in
35:30
Speaker 1: her mouth, but I believe it was like she said
35:33
Speaker 1: she would feel a little stupid if she found out
35:35
Speaker 1: a different way.
35:35
Speaker 2: True.
35:36
Speaker 1: So she was like, I'd much prefer you just to
35:38
Speaker 1: tell me. Obviously, don't introduce her as like, this is
35:41
Speaker 1: such and such I slept with, you know, in 20
35:42
Speaker 1: fucking 20. But... But yeah, she said, I'd want to know.
35:48
Speaker 2: And I was like, hey, fair. You made it go,
35:51
Speaker 2: you lost your virginity. We'd be like, hey.
35:55
Speaker 1: The person I lost my virginity to, I would avoid
35:58
Speaker 1: in the street, to be honest with you. True, actually.
36:03
Speaker 1: I would avoid. And it would suck if she said, hey,
36:05
Speaker 1: because I'd be like, hey.
36:10
Speaker 2: I hope we helped, buddy.
36:11
Speaker 1: What would you do if you ran into the person
36:13
Speaker 1: you lost virginity to?
36:15
Speaker 2: She'd want to talk to me, eh?
36:16
Speaker 1: Yeah. And you'd be like, hey, and then just- Well.
36:19
Speaker 2: Cassie knows her.
36:20
Speaker 1: Yeah.
36:20
Speaker 2: Phyllis knows of her.
36:21
Speaker 1: She knows you dated. Yeah. Like, come on. Yeah.
36:26
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'd chat to her.
36:26
Speaker 1: I got a joke going around with Beth that I
36:28
Speaker 1: didn't sleep with any of my previous girlfriends.
36:31
Speaker 2: Asexual? You changed me, Beth.
36:33
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's like we would always nearly get there, and
36:36
Speaker 1: then I would say, stop, whoa, whoa, I'm waiting for Beth.
36:38
Speaker 1: I'm waiting for Beth.
36:40
Speaker 2: You knew her name and everything?
36:41
Speaker 1: Yeah, I told you.
36:41
Speaker 2: All right, here we go. Hey guys, love the pod.
36:45
Speaker 2: I've been a listener for a couple of years. I
36:47
Speaker 2: drive for a living and you guys have always been
36:49
Speaker 2: great company.
36:50
Speaker 1: Thanks.
36:51
Speaker 2: That's the best compliment. And baddies, for anyone who also
36:55
Speaker 2: enjoys our company, be sure to tell a friend. Five
36:59
Speaker 2: star this podcast, leave a comment and subscribe on YouTube, please.
37:03
Speaker 2: We used to say all the time, we're going to
37:05
Speaker 2: the moon and you're coming with us. Here we go.
37:08
Speaker 2: This is what the dilemma actually said. I'm so sorry.
37:10
Speaker 2: I hope this isn't too long. My boyfriend and I
37:12
Speaker 2: were on holiday when he very aimlessly brought up how
37:16
Speaker 2: he was feeling unsatisfied in our relationship. It sounds mean,
37:20
Speaker 2: but I say aimlessly because it was very random and
37:23
Speaker 2: I had to ask him like 101 questions to figure
37:26
Speaker 2: out what exactly he meant, where this came from. To preface,
37:30
Speaker 2: my boyfriend and I, both 23, have been together for
37:32
Speaker 2: two years. We don't live together. I flat. Is that
37:36
Speaker 2: a way to say, we don't live together, I flat,
37:38
Speaker 2: and he lives at home.
37:40
Speaker 1: She flats just means she lives in an apartment. Oh, right.
37:43
Speaker 1: I've never heard that. Or maybe with someone.
37:45
Speaker 2: We see each other three days out of the week
37:47
Speaker 2: and generally have sex two to three of those days.
37:50
Speaker 2: Our love languages are different. He is very physical touch,
37:54
Speaker 2: in brackets, as most men tend to be, and I
37:57
Speaker 2: am very acts of service and words of affirmation.
38:01
Speaker 1: Hold the phone. I feel like it's the complete opposite.
38:03
Speaker 2: We'll get to that.
38:04
Speaker 1: Oh, okay.
38:06
Speaker 2: I guess we're still figuring out how to love each other.
38:08
Speaker 2: But the conversation we continue to have after he mentioned
38:11
Speaker 2: feeling unsatisfied has really stuck with me. I would also
38:16
Speaker 2: like to add that I adore this boy. I have
38:18
Speaker 2: never loved someone like this before. He had raised two points.
38:22
Speaker 2: I don't initiate kissing and he feels like we don't
38:25
Speaker 2: have sex enough. The kissing thing is true. It's not intentional.
38:29
Speaker 2: I'm not a big kisser and it's something he has
38:31
Speaker 2: mentioned before. To be honest, I do forget sometimes as
38:34
Speaker 2: I'm more of a hug slash hold hands kind of gal.
38:38
Speaker 2: I've always been like this, but it is a thing
38:40
Speaker 2: I'm trying to work on and I generally make the
38:42
Speaker 2: effort and try and meet him halfway. The sex thing
38:46
Speaker 2: has really thrown me off, however. He's mentioned feeling like
38:49
Speaker 2: we don't have enough sex before, but we never really
38:52
Speaker 2: spoke about it. This time I asked him, when we
38:55
Speaker 2: move in together, how much sex would we need to
38:57
Speaker 2: have in a week in order for him to feel satisfied.
39:04
Speaker 2: After a lot of teeth pulling, figuratively, He finally answered
39:07
Speaker 2: with five out of seven. He's unrealistic.
39:13
Speaker 1: That's way too much.
39:15
Speaker 2: I was quite honestly godsmacked for a number of reasons.
39:18
Speaker 2: There's so many elements to this whole sex thing. I
39:21
Speaker 2: have endo and PMDD. Both of these really mess with
39:25
Speaker 2: my hormones, day-to-day pain, and especially my libido.
39:29
Speaker 1: I feel nauseous.
39:30
Speaker 2: Three days out of the month. When I'm horny, I
39:33
Speaker 2: love to initiate and enjoy jumping his bones. This girl
39:37
Speaker 2: speaks another language. In saying this, I have in general
39:41
Speaker 2: never been a sexual person. If it were up to me,
39:44
Speaker 2: I'd have sex once or twice a week and feel
39:46
Speaker 2: happy about it.
39:48
Speaker 1: Honestly. I feel like once a week is fucking plenty.
39:51
Speaker 1: You're not unsexual.
39:54
Speaker 2: Yeah, and I would also say, like, I would break
39:56
Speaker 2: up with him for one reason and one reason only.
39:58
Speaker 1: Five out of seven days.
40:00
Speaker 2: So he knows, obviously, that you have endo and PMDD.
40:05
Speaker 1: Yeah.
40:06
Speaker 2: And he must see what you go through each month.
40:09
Speaker 1: That's so nice.
40:10
Speaker 2: And then he's putting that aside and saying, I want
40:12
Speaker 2: to fuck five out of seven days. He didn't say
40:15
Speaker 2: that initially. He said we need to be having more sex,
40:17
Speaker 2: and he's not. Seeing what your body goes through.
40:20
Speaker 1: That's so fucked. Can we butcher in this? Pretty sure
40:23
Speaker 1: I'm correct, though. Endometriosis can make sex very painful for women. Yeah,
40:27
Speaker 1: I've heard that. So, you need to break up with
40:29
Speaker 1: this guy. What do you love about him? That's so gnarly.
40:33
Speaker 2: Yeah, and it's like.
40:36
Speaker 1: The answer is break up. That's the only answer there is,
40:37
Speaker 1: and you're not getting another one out of us.
40:39
Speaker 2: Because if taking away the endo and, sorry, PMDD.
40:48
Speaker 2: I would say it's worth a conversation. Just say no.
40:52
Speaker 1: Say, bro, five out of seven days is crazy. Stand
40:55
Speaker 1: on business. Just be like, what the fuck?
40:56
Speaker 2: It's still like, I feel like you'd work through that.
40:59
Speaker 2: But for that reason, I would say you can't. But
41:00
Speaker 2: it's kind of like, it's not much give and take there.
41:03
Speaker 2: I feel like even one day a week is a
41:05
Speaker 2: great compromise.
41:06
Speaker 1: Also, isn't it like mad icky for him to be like,
41:09
Speaker 1: to know that you don't want to have sex five
41:11
Speaker 1: out of seven days a week, but then when You
41:13
Speaker 1: say what would make you satisfied. He's happy to be
41:16
Speaker 1: like five out of the seven. Does that not make
41:18
Speaker 1: him feel icky? Like just because your girlfriend doesn't want
41:22
Speaker 1: to have sex with you every fucking day doesn't mean
41:24
Speaker 1: they don't love you and they're not sexually attracted to you. Hormones, bro.
41:30
Speaker 1: Think about shit. What the fuck is wrong with you?
41:32
Speaker 1: How old are they?
41:34
Speaker 2: That's actually a great point, dude. I don't want to
41:37
Speaker 2: jump to conclusions, but do you think he only like
41:41
Speaker 2: sees her for sex?
41:42
Speaker 1: Yeah, depending on your age, I fully will admit that
41:45
Speaker 1: I've been in relationships that would like lust and not love.
41:47
Speaker 1: I thought they were love.
41:48
Speaker 2: Yeah.
41:49
Speaker 1: Fully thought they were love. Because I was in love.
41:51
Speaker 1: Take away the sex, I'd be like, I'm done.
41:54
Speaker 2: Exactly. And like, maybe you should ask him that. Like
41:57
Speaker 2: if I said today, like, we can't have sex anymore.
42:00
Speaker 2: Maybe because of my endo or because of anything. And
42:03
Speaker 2: he went, oh, that'd be a problem.
42:04
Speaker 1: You'd be like, well, fuck off then. And like, honestly,
42:07
Speaker 1: it's allowed to be a problem, but you're just different people.
42:10
Speaker 2: Yeah, and it's weird, though, because when you do love someone, like,
42:13
Speaker 2: sex is amazing. The connection is uncomparable, but you're not
42:16
Speaker 2: in the relationship for the sex. You're in it because
42:18
Speaker 2: you're in love with this person, and you're like two
42:21
Speaker 2: souls are combined, and it's amazing.
42:23
Speaker 1: Bro, this sounds so crazy. I think you need to
42:25
Speaker 1: break up with this guy. Don't give me that bullshit
42:28
Speaker 1: of you've never loved anyone like this. Trust me, you'll
42:30
Speaker 1: find someone that loves you for who you are and
42:31
Speaker 1: doesn't just want to fuck you five out of seven
42:33
Speaker 1: days a week, and you'll know what real love is. Yeah, true.
42:36
Speaker 1: Jesus Christ. Yeah, I don't.
42:39
Speaker 2: Like it makes, like you say, you make him feel
42:41
Speaker 2: like icky.
42:42
Speaker 1: And like, if that's like, if I was like, Oh, um,
42:46
Speaker 1: if Beth said to me, I, I gotta, I gotta
42:49
Speaker 1: be honest with you because of just like, you know,
42:51
Speaker 1: PCOS and, and stuff like that. There's probably, there's like
42:54
Speaker 1: maybe four or five days out of the month that
42:56
Speaker 1: I feel actually good. And, and you know, horny for
43:02
Speaker 1: any other day, unless she's like, no, I'm actually horny
43:06
Speaker 1: any other day. If I'm like, can we have sex?
43:09
Speaker 1: And she's kind of like, yeah. Maybe kind of like,
43:15
Speaker 1: iffy is a no. Like a bit iffy is a no.
43:19
Speaker 2: I don't know if he's going into the, it's probably
43:22
Speaker 2: all consensual, but like.
43:23
Speaker 1: Oh, look, I mean, yeah, it's treading a line because
43:26
Speaker 1: you could argue, you know, someone that wants to have
43:29
Speaker 1: sex five out of seven days a week and you
43:32
Speaker 1: want to have sex when you feel like having sex,
43:34
Speaker 1: which is quite often maybe three days a month. And
43:38
Speaker 1: if you're having sex just to keep that person happy,
43:42
Speaker 1: you're treading on the line of consent there. There's definitely
43:45
Speaker 1: many ways to say that that's not consensual.
43:48
Speaker 2: Yeah.
43:49
Speaker 1: I don't like it.
43:49
Speaker 2: And, like, it's hard for us because we look at sex, like,
43:54
Speaker 2: through a lens of, like, I want my partner to
43:56
Speaker 2: feel sexy and want it and want me. But wanting
44:00
Speaker 2: me is as much as wanting herself first. And, like,
44:03
Speaker 2: this guy doesn't give a fuck about how you feel.
44:04
Speaker 1: It doesn't sound like it. By the way you walk.
44:08
Speaker 1: I mean look I gotta say maybe props to him
44:10
Speaker 1: for bringing something up that's affecting him but it's just
44:12
Speaker 1: like irrational in my opinion it's just irrational so it's
44:16
Speaker 1: like so I can understand the not instigating kissing by
44:20
Speaker 1: all means like kiss more I think that's fine if
44:25
Speaker 1: he wants to be kissed more kiss him more I
44:26
Speaker 1: think that's fine but.
44:30
Speaker 2: I think this would be a fine dilemma if you
44:33
Speaker 2: were having sex once or twice every couple months And
44:36
Speaker 2: then he goes, look, I would like to have sex
44:37
Speaker 2: a little bit more just to like feel wanted. I'd
44:39
Speaker 2: be like, oh yeah, we can work on that.
44:40
Speaker 1: Or like once a week, maybe like twice a month.
44:42
Speaker 1: I don't know.
44:43
Speaker 2: Yeah, I feel like that's something we can work on.
44:45
Speaker 2: But five to six times a week, I just want to,
44:46
Speaker 2: like basically all I want to do is fuck you.
44:48
Speaker 2: It's just like, shut the fuck up.
44:49
Speaker 1: You would feel, what it would like, now that you
44:51
Speaker 1: know this, got to think about it this way. Now
44:53
Speaker 1: that you have this knowledge, right? If and when you
44:58
Speaker 1: move in together, every single day, let's just say one day,
45:03
Speaker 1: you're like, I'm not, I can't have sex today. I
45:05
Speaker 1: just don't feel it. And so he's kind of like,
45:07
Speaker 1: oh yeah, yeah, cool, whatever. There's six days left. Everything
45:12
Speaker 1: in you is going to be trying to ignore it,
45:13
Speaker 1: but you're going to be constantly thinking five out of
45:16
Speaker 1: six days now. And you're going to feel forced to
45:19
Speaker 1: have sex to keep him happy. That's not right. I
45:21
Speaker 1: actually know what she should do. What?
45:25
Speaker 2: Don't talk about this anymore. Stop having sex with him
45:28
Speaker 2: and see.
45:29
Speaker 1: How he reacts.
45:31
Speaker 2: Because she actually, she loves him. See if he gets
45:35
Speaker 2: all short and snappy and see how much he values
45:37
Speaker 2: sex in this relationship and see if he's actually in
45:40
Speaker 2: love with you or not. And then if he brings
45:41
Speaker 2: it up, I'll be like, oh, I haven't been feeling well.
45:43
Speaker 2: I don't want to fuck.
45:44
Speaker 1: And if he gets all like, oh, break up with him.
45:47
Speaker 2: Yeah, I reckon break up with him now. It's easier
45:51
Speaker 2: said than done for us to say break up right now.
45:53
Speaker 2: But she needs to see it for herself.
45:55
Speaker 1: Yeah, I reckon you got to break up with him now.
45:57
Speaker 1: Fuck that. It's not what you want in a relationship.
45:59
Speaker 1: That sounds crazy. Like genuinely, could you imagine me going
46:03
Speaker 1: to Beth's? I just think we should be having sex
46:05
Speaker 1: five out of seven days a week. If I said
46:07
Speaker 1: to you, I was like, I went up to Beth
46:09
Speaker 1: and said that, you would be like, what are you
46:12
Speaker 1: talking about? You'd be wigging out.
46:14
Speaker 2: I'd be like, what? It's got to come. We're trying
46:17
Speaker 2: to figure it out. It's got to come back to
46:18
Speaker 2: like understanding of women. And he has zero understanding of
46:23
Speaker 2: your body and how women are. Yeah.
46:28
Speaker 1: That's a pretty good point.
46:29
Speaker 2: Has he seen you on your period?
46:30
Speaker 1: Yeah.
46:30
Speaker 2: Like... What women go through? Is he just like, oh, la-di-da,
46:34
Speaker 2: I wanna fuck.
46:37
Speaker 1: True. Hey, there's also, there's one week of the month where,
46:40
Speaker 1: unless he's keen to get all bloody, like, you guys
46:44
Speaker 1: aren't having sex for a week.
46:45
Speaker 2: Yeah.
46:46
Speaker 1: And imagine if he's like, no, I'm keen to get bloody. Like,
46:50
Speaker 1: I mean, I've definitely done it, but only when my
46:53
Speaker 1: girlfriend's been like, no, I want to.
46:55
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, it's on her terms.
46:56
Speaker 1: By no means am I ever instigating sex while she's
46:58
Speaker 1: on her period. I feel like that's, for some reason,
47:00
Speaker 1: I just feel like, That's crossing a boundary. I have
47:03
Speaker 1: no idea why. But I've only ever had sex with
47:05
Speaker 1: Beth on her period if she instigates it.
47:08
Speaker 2: Oh, yeah, 100%.
47:09
Speaker 1: I'm a big, like, chuck it out.
47:11
Speaker 2: She's like, but I'm waiting.
47:12
Speaker 1: I'm like, chuck it out. Yeah.
47:13
Speaker 2: I think she's got to be the one to say, like, oh,
47:15
Speaker 2: I'm on my period. Do you mind? I'm like, no,
47:16
Speaker 2: not at all. Yeah. Because I don't mind. Also, I'm
47:18
Speaker 2: not being the one, like.
47:18
Speaker 1: You're on your period. Let's do it. Oh, yeah. Actually,
47:27
Speaker 1: I have my own dilemma. Ooh. This morning... So actually,
47:33
Speaker 1: first of all, this morning, Beth calls me in to
47:37
Speaker 1: our room. She had a bad dream. I cheated on her.
47:40
Speaker 2: Are you fucking kidding me?
47:42
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I had to console. I said,
47:44
Speaker 1: of course, that would never happen. That's silly. You know
47:46
Speaker 1: what she had to add in there too? She goes,
47:47
Speaker 1: I caught you texting some ugly bitch. And I was like,
47:50
Speaker 1: come on. Was she that bad? I got a pretty
47:52
Speaker 1: high standard. Anywho, anywho, anywho. And then after we joked
47:58
Speaker 1: around and I consoled. And I won her back. Yes.
48:03
Speaker 1: Henry was laying down on the bed and I was
48:05
Speaker 1: kind of like cuddling him. And I was like, oh, hypothetically,
48:10
Speaker 1: let's say we break up. And if that was to happen,
48:12
Speaker 1: she would take Henry and I would take Darcy, right?
48:14
Speaker 1: I was like, if you got a new man, do
48:16
Speaker 1: you reckon Henry would love him? Wait. Without taking a breath,
48:22
Speaker 1: she says, yeah.
48:23
Speaker 2: She didn't even have to think about it.
48:24
Speaker 1: Without taking a breath, she's like, yeah. I was like,
48:30
Speaker 1: first of all, You're supposed to say we're never going
48:33
Speaker 1: to break up. First of all. And then second of all, lie.
48:39
Speaker 1: Don't tell me what you really think. It's like, what?
48:42
Speaker 2: Is that what you should do?
48:43
Speaker 1: I was like, I may as well go die.
48:45
Speaker 2: You should go print off a photo of you, Beth
48:48
Speaker 2: and Henry. Cut your face out and be like.
48:50
Speaker 1: There you go.
48:53
Speaker 2: I'll cut her face out. I was like, fuck, bro.
48:59
Speaker 1: Put your new man in there. So that's my dilemma.
49:02
Speaker 2: Should I give you some advice?
49:04
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah. Do I leave this heartless human?
49:09
Speaker 2: Yeah, you've got to do something.
49:12
Speaker 1: That's for sure. And who would she choose, huh? I
49:15
Speaker 1: need to find out who she would choose. Who would
49:16
Speaker 1: she be with?
49:17
Speaker 2: Yeah Maybe she thinks Like if you broke up Like
49:20
Speaker 2: she'd upgrade Mate So like obviously Henry Who would love
49:26
Speaker 2: He would love Henry.
49:27
Speaker 1: You need to find someone That's Loves dogs Tell you
49:30
Speaker 1: that much Ah.
49:33
Speaker 2: The thing that gets me Is like We've talked about
49:36
Speaker 2: it before There's a time and a place For a
49:38
Speaker 2: white lie Mm Oh, yeah.
49:40
Speaker 1: Big fan of White Lies.
49:41
Speaker 2: Maybe you should get her like a.
49:43
Speaker 1: And then you know what? Actually, I told her White
49:45
Speaker 1: Lie right after that because she goes, you know what
49:47
Speaker 1: I do know is if we broke up and you
49:49
Speaker 1: got a new girlfriend, Darcy wouldn't love her. And then
49:52
Speaker 1: I was like, yeah, obviously not. But I'll tell you
49:54
Speaker 1: one thing right fucking now. With enough time, she definitely would.
49:58
Speaker 2: She's a dog.
50:00
Speaker 1: She would definitely love her.
50:02
Speaker 2: You should get, like, remember those books, those yellow books,
50:05
Speaker 2: it was like lying for dummies?
50:06
Speaker 1: Yes. White lies for dummies.
50:08
Speaker 2: Do you know that convo we had this morning?
50:10
Speaker 1: Yeah.
50:11
Speaker 2: It's a time and a place lie.
50:12
Speaker 3: Yeah.
50:13
Speaker 2: My feelings matter sometimes.
50:14
Speaker 1: Yeah. You know what? Yeah. You're on. You're on.
50:24
Speaker 2: Baddies, it is time for comments. If you want to
50:26
Speaker 2: get a comment read, you know what to do by now.
50:28
Speaker 2: Simply comment on the episode you are listening to. I've
50:30
Speaker 2: got Spotify where we talked about the bed divider. Ren said,
50:34
Speaker 2: have you guys thought about a retractable tennis net type
50:39
Speaker 2: vibe on the headboard or something?
50:42
Speaker 1: Actually, yes.
50:43
Speaker 2: Lots of love from South Africa.
50:45
Speaker 1: Actually, good question. And yes, we have. The way I
50:48
Speaker 1: explained it was you can get these like baby gates
50:52
Speaker 1: that you put at the top of your stairs. that
50:54
Speaker 1: like they're made of wood or plastic, but like you
50:56
Speaker 1: push them in and it's almost like an accordion.
50:58
Speaker 2: Yeah.
50:58
Speaker 1: And so I thought you could have one of them
51:00
Speaker 1: on the bed head that you just kind of grab
51:02
Speaker 1: onto and throw down to the end of the bed
51:04
Speaker 1: and you're fully divided, but just no one's going to
51:07
Speaker 1: buy that.
51:07
Speaker 2: They make like fly screens like that too. Yes.
51:10
Speaker 1: Correct.
51:11
Speaker 2: I actually had a great idea for it. So you
51:12
Speaker 2: know how we like locked in the sort of ratchet strap?
51:16
Speaker 2: What about like, it didn't come to us then, but
51:18
Speaker 2: like a padded pillow ratchet strap. So instead of having
51:23
Speaker 2: rope as a ratchet, it's like, so the ratchet's probably
51:25
Speaker 2: underneath it and then on top is this pillow-like thing
51:29
Speaker 2: and you ratchet it down and then pillow's there in
51:31
Speaker 2: the middle for sexy time and then it's also a
51:33
Speaker 2: ratchet so you're not going anywhere. Locks the doona or duvet.
51:38
Speaker 3: In.
51:38
Speaker 1: We're getting places. This is what brainstorming sessions are about. Yes.
51:41
Speaker 1: This is why we do them. Yes, it is. And
51:43
Speaker 1: you get more than one mind in for this type
51:45
Speaker 1: of thing. All right. I've got YouTube from Quartz Draws.
51:51
Speaker 3: Oh, yeah?
51:52
Speaker 1: Oh, we've clinked some clorts in this house, lol. That's
51:57
Speaker 1: about clinkers. That was about the clinkers.
51:59
Speaker 2: You said, yeah.
52:00
Speaker 1: So it says, oh, we've clinked some clorts in this house, lol.
52:05
Speaker 2: What's clorts?
52:05
Speaker 1: I don't exactly know what she means, but I assume
52:07
Speaker 1: she's just said, I've thought with my clit.
52:09
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
52:10
Speaker 1: Because we were talking about whether or not. So guys
52:13
Speaker 1: think with their little head or whatever. Women got to be. Oh,
52:16
Speaker 1: she's just saying that she's thought with a vagina before.
52:18
Speaker 2: Yeah, she's been clinking.
52:19
Speaker 1: Yeah, she's clinked before. What's a clink?
52:21
Speaker 2: We didn't use the word clink.
52:21
Speaker 1: She's definitely clinked some.
52:23
Speaker 2: Yeah, she's clinked some things. What's a clink? Yeah, sounds
52:26
Speaker 2: like clinked.
52:27
Speaker 1: We've clinked some clanks.
52:30
Speaker 2: Clinky clanks.
52:31
Speaker 1: Anywho, if you're a clinker, hand up in the comments.
52:36
Speaker 2: Baddies, it's time for one of you to sign off
52:38
Speaker 2: the episode. The link will be in the description. Jake, today,
52:41
Speaker 2: who are we going to call?
52:42
Speaker 1: Emma. Hello.
52:44
Speaker 2: Hello, is that Emma? Hello, is that Emma?
52:51
Speaker 1: Hello? Yeah. Is that Emma? Yes, it is. Ah, Emma,
52:56
Speaker 1: it's Jake and Odi from the Relatables podcast. How's it going?
52:59
Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, I'm good. How are you?
53:00
Speaker 1: Very good. Very good. Thank you for picking up.
53:03
Speaker 2: Can you hear me, Emma?
53:05
Speaker 3: Yeah, sorry, you dropped out for a second, but I
53:06
Speaker 3: can hear you now.
53:08
Speaker 2: You just like Jake better than me.
53:09
Speaker 1: I thought you were just ignoring Odi.
53:10
Speaker 2: No way.
53:11
Speaker 3: How's your day been? Yeah, I've been to the gym.
53:19
Speaker 3: I've got some things done. It's been very productive, actually.
53:22
Speaker 1: Nice, nice. Do you know why we're calling?
53:25
Speaker 3: To sign off an episode? Yeah.
53:29
Speaker 1: What have you got for us? Anything good? Ooh.
53:32
Speaker 3: I have a quote, actually. I have one written down.
53:36
Speaker 3: Let me grab it.
53:37
Speaker 2: There you go.
53:39
Speaker 3: Where are we?
53:41
Speaker 1: It is....
53:45
Speaker 3: Don't let your smile change. Wait, let me restart that.
53:52
Speaker 3: Don't let the world change your smile. Let your smile
53:55
Speaker 3: change the world.
53:57
Speaker 1: That's a banger. That's probably the best one we've had
54:00
Speaker 1: for a while.
54:00
Speaker 2: I like that quote, Emma.
54:05
Speaker 1: That's really good.
54:06
Speaker 2: Just be out here smiling.
54:08
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a good one. Thank you.
54:10
Speaker 2: Thanks so much, Emma.
54:11
Speaker 1: Have a good rest of your afternoon.
54:14
Speaker 3: You too.
54:15
Speaker 1: Thanks, guys. Thank you very much. Goodbye. Bye. Bye. Dang,
54:20
Speaker 1: that was a cool one. Don't let the world.
54:22
Speaker 2: Change your smile.
54:23
Speaker 1: Don't let your smile change the world.
54:27
Speaker 2: All you're really saying is I'm smiling a lot. Smile
54:29
Speaker 2: ear to ear, and I'll say, stay bad. I hate
54:31
Speaker 2: smiling when I'm not happy.
54:38
Speaker 1: Why aren't you happy? Oh, actually, it's not true. I'm happy.
54:41
Speaker 1: I hate smiling when it's not, like, brought on.
54:43
Speaker 3: True.
54:43
Speaker 1: I don't know how to say that. What do you
54:45
Speaker 1: want me to say?
54:46
Speaker 2: We love you.
54:47
Speaker 1: Oh, stay mad.