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Character and Class: Becoming On Purpose · R.E.A.L. Talk for REAL L.Y.F.E.

• 0:00
  Welcome to Real Talk for Real Life, where we are realizing everyone is always
• 0:07
  learning and living your full experience.
• 0:12
  I'm your host, Coach C, and this is Season 6, Episode 1, Character and Class.
• 0:21
  Season 6, we're talking about becoming on purpose.
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  Not simply healing, not simply motivation, not simply going after your dreams.
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  I'm talking about intentional evolution.
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  Because at some point, you have to stop asking only, what do I want?
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  And start asking, who do I need to become?
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  Who am I when nobody is applauding?
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  Who am I when I'm the advantage. Who am I when the person standing in front
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  of me can't do a single thing for me?
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  Because becoming isn't just about elevation.
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  It's about character.
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  And baby, if we're going to start this season anywhere, we're starting right there.
• 1:15
  Character and class. Listen, in my opinion, you cannot have one without the other.
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  Because to truly have class, you have to be a person of character.
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  Now, people have confused class with a whole lot of things.
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  They think class is money, education, a title, a nice house,
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  a luxury vehicle, designer clothes, knowing which fork to use at the fancy dinner table.
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  No, those things might tell me something about your access.
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  They don't necessarily tell me anything about your character.
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  Because I've met people who could walk into a room dripping in labels and still
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  leave everybody in that room feeling small.
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  And I've also met people without two nickels to rub together who possess a richness
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  that money could not manufacture.
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  THAT'S CHARACTER.
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  I always tell the people closest to me, your character matters most because
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  accomplishments can introduce you.
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  Talent can create opportunities for you. Connections can put you in rooms.
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  Money can buy you access, but character determines what you do once you get there.
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  How you treat people matters.
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  How you treat people matters. Let me say it one more time.
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  How you treat people matters.
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  And not only the people you love, not only the people you respect,
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  and definitely not only the people who can do something for you.
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  We've all seen some version of the meme that says, treat the janitor with the
• 3:08
  same respect you give the CEO.
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  Now, I believe that with everything in me because we're all somebody.
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  That janitor is somebody's mother or somebody's father, somebody's child,
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  somebody's best friend,
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  somebody who has dreams, who has bills, who's experienced heartbreaks,
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  victories, and a whole life that existed before they walked into your line of sight.
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  A person's job title does not establish their human value.
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  So if your respect changes according to somebody's position,
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  baby, that isn't respect.
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  That's strategy. And there is a difference.
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  Character shows up when it costs you something.
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  It's easy to appear classy when everything is going your way.
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  But let somebody tell you no.
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  Let somebody disagree with you. Let somebody get the opportunity you thought belonged to you.
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  Let somebody stop being useful to you. Let somebody offend you.
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  Now we're getting somewhere.
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  Because character isn't proven when behaving well benefits you.
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  Character gets revealed when behaving well costs you something.
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  Can you still tell the truth when lying would protect you?
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  Can you apologize without adding, but you?
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  Can you celebrate somebody when you're still waiting for your term?
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  Can you walk away without trying to destroy somebody on your way out?
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  Can you disagree without disrespecting? Can you be angry without becoming cruel?
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  That's character.
• 5:00
  And character doesn't mean perfection. Now don't twist this up.
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  Character doesn't mean you're perfect.
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  I am not perfect. You are not perfect. We are going to have moments when we miss the mark.
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  We're going to say something wrong. Respond too quickly. Misread a situation.
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  Get irritated. Get defensive because we're human.
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  Character isn't never getting it wrong. Character is what you do when you realize you got it wrong.
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  Do you own it? Do you correct it?
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  Do you apologize? Do you learn? do you change or do you spend all your energy
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  reasoning your way out of responsibility,
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  because accountability is part of character too.
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  Show me class without character and this is where coach c is going to leave
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  you with this one show me class without character and i'll show you a clown
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  because you can dress it up,
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  put a degree behind it, put a title in front of it,
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  give it followers, give it money, give it influence, even give it a microphone,
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  but eventually character introduces itself.
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  And that's why as you become on purpose, I don't want you concentrating only
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  on what you're building.
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  Pay attention to who is doing the building.
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  Because there's no point building the dream and losing yourself in the construction.
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  I just don't want the promotion. I want the character to carry it.
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  I don't just want the platform. I want the integrity to steward it.
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  I don't just want success. I want to still recognize myself when I get there.
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  That's becoming on purpose.
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  Here's your fearless homework. the character check.
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  This week, I want you to examine your character in places where nobody is grading you.
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  Ask yourself, number one, who gets the best version of my respect?
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  Is my kindness consistent or does it change based on someone's status,
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  usefulness, or relationship to me?
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  Number two, who am I when I'm offended?
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  Do I communicate, correct, and create boundaries, or do I become intentionally
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  hurtful because I've been hurt?
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  Number three, where do I owe accountability?
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  Identify one situation where you've been explaining your behavior instead of owning it.
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  And number four, what would people consistently experience from me?
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  Write down three words you want people to associate with your character.
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  Then ask yourself whether your current behavior supports those words.
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  And here's the fearless part. Do one thing this week that strengthens your character
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  but earns you absolutely nothing.
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  No applause. No post.
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  No recognition. No reciprocation required.
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  Do it simply because that's who you've decided to be.
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  Because Season 6 isn't only about getting somewhere. It's about becoming someone.
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  And we're doing it on purpose.
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  Remember, live fearless, keep learning, keep living.
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  This is Real Talk for Real Life where everyone is always learning and you're
• 8:55
  living your full experience.
• 8:58
  Make sure you're following me on Instagram and Facebook at Real Talk for Real Life.
• 9:03
  That's L-Y-F-E for more inspiration, merchandise, and motivation between episodes.
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  This is Coach C. I'll see you in the next one.