Latest / Good Morning From The Chicken Coop! / Season 4 - Episode 142 -How your rules dictate your expectations

Transcript

Season 4 - Episode 142 -How your rules dictate your expectations · Good Morning From The Chicken Coop!

• 0:01
  Hey everybody, welcome to the good morning from the Chicken
• 0:04
  Coop podcast. My name is Kim Johnson and I am
• 0:07
  a mastermindset coach, creative strategist, and also happened to
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  be a farmer. This is my chicken coop and I
• 0:12
  come out here every day to record a podcast to teach
• 0:16
  distinctions, possibilities, new ways of thinking, and just bring
• 0:20
  some joy into the world. So welcome to the coop and let's
• 0:23
  start your day off in a fantastic way.
• 0:27
  Hey everybody, good morning. Let's talk about expectations
• 0:31
  today because we all have them and it's crazy how we all have
• 0:35
  them. They are unwritten, often
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  unspoken. We are making them up as we go
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  along, yet we have them and sometimes things show up and all
• 0:48
  of a sudden you discover you have them.
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  And I can tell you a good amount of my coaching sessions when I'm
• 0:54
  talking to people are based off of conflict that shows up when
• 0:59
  you have expectations that you are unaware of.
• 1:04
  So think about it, if you have, if you know that there's
• 1:08
  something that could potentially happen and there's a conflict
• 1:11
  brewing out there, then you've already sorted through it or
• 1:16
  you've already consciously said, hey, this could be a challenge.
• 1:19
  This could be a conflict. This is where we're going
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  through. So your, your future pacing it
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  and you're figuring it out as you fly.
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  And those we tend to if when we have awareness of them, we can
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  tend to work through them a bit better if we are anticipating
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  ahead of time what it could look like.
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  Now there is some cause to sit there and say, well, if I'm
• 1:41
  anticipating it, am I drawing it into me?
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  And that's a whole different conversation because it depends
• 1:46
  on the emotion that you're using to anticipate it.
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  However, what I'm talking about are these things that show up in
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  the moment and you're like, I can't believe that.
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  So a lot of this happens in our moment to moment daily life
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  where we'll have something and it blindsides us.
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  So I've had this happen in the past where I've had expectations
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  on air quoting of people in my life that were friends and these
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  quote UN quote, friends did not act in the rules of a friend.
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  Now, I understand now and I understand stood then that these
• 2:29
  are unwritten rules, but we all have them.
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  So when a friend doesn't show up the right way or, or you're sick
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  and let's say that you're, you're expecting them to come
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  and they're going to drop something off at your house, a
• 2:42
  package or whatever. And you're like, I've been so
• 2:45
  sick. How come, how come they're not
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  offering to drop anything off? How come they're not doing this?
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  Because that's how you would act in that situation.
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  You would offer to drop something off, whether it was
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  ginger ale, crackers, soup, whatever.
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  You would say, I'm just going to take a care package, knock on
• 3:02
  their door, leave it for them so that they're taken care of.
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  And that's exactly the situation that happened to me years ago,
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  where I had expectations of people that I thought were best
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  friends and that that did not happen.
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  And it it did not, I cannot say without any question.