Latest / Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash / #206 Ilai Matangi aka Havea_676

Transcript

#206 Ilai Matangi aka Havea_676 · Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash

• 0:15
  Speaker 1: Ash.
• 0:15
  Speaker 2: Today's guest went from humble school counselor to one of
• 0:18
  Speaker 2: Australia's most beloved content creators. Not yourself, Ash, no oh,
• 0:23
  Speaker 2: I'm sorry about that. He's even more popular than you.
• 0:26
  Speaker 3: That's probably true. Yesterday, Matt, we have Eli Mtanghi, who
• 0:33
  Speaker 3: is a dad to four girls who are the center
• 0:36
  Speaker 3: of most of his content.
• 0:37
  Speaker 2: I will say, and a lot of people might not
• 0:39
  Speaker 2: know that they know his three girls to feature in
• 0:41
  Speaker 2: his content, but he also has a stepdaughter from when
• 0:43
  Speaker 2: he first met his wife, Petta. It was great to
• 0:45
  Speaker 2: talk about his perspective on parenting and also his background,
• 0:49
  Speaker 2: the fact that he spent a lot of time and
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: a lot of different locations growing up before he ended
• 0:54
  Speaker 2: up in Brisbane where he lives now.
• 0:56
  Speaker 3: Yes, and I've heard based off the chat he's got
• 0:58
  Speaker 3: Arthur Dickte's and Ankle.
• 1:01
  Speaker 2: It will be stoked that we put that in the intro.
• 1:03
  Speaker 3: I love that he's amassed four point six million followers.
• 1:08
  Speaker 3: That must be nice, would be nice, Actually give us
• 1:10
  Speaker 3: a million, would just give us, Just give me cheeky
• 1:12
  Speaker 3: one hundred.
• 1:13
  Speaker 2: Thousand them all. But his content is amazing. He also
• 1:16
  Speaker 2: won the TikTok Creative of the Year award recently, he
• 1:19
  Speaker 2: is killing it.
• 1:21
  Speaker 3: That speech was very emotional, nearly made me cry. But
• 1:24
  Speaker 3: fun fact, we actually made him a little emotional on
• 1:26
  Speaker 3: this episode.
• 1:27
  Speaker 2: The big guys are big softy, isn't he Absolutely, let's
• 1:31
  Speaker 2: get into it.
• 1:31
  Speaker 4: Let's do it.
• 1:33
  Speaker 2: Welcome back to three doting dads. I'm Maddie, Jay, I'm.
• 1:36
  Speaker 4: Ash and it's your boy seven six Sorry.
• 1:45
  Speaker 2: I'm so sorry, so sorry. What were you saying?
• 1:49
  Speaker 4: I was actually gonna say, my name is my tongue
• 1:52
  Speaker 4: six seven six Wow, like smooth FM.
• 1:55
  Speaker 3: I just was thinking love song dedications. Then we're going
• 1:58
  Speaker 3: to have your love song dedication Valentine's Day and after that.
• 2:02
  Speaker 2: But this is a podcast all about parenting. It is
• 2:05
  Speaker 2: the good, it is the bad and the relatable and Eli,
• 2:09
  Speaker 2: we we don't give advice, but you may if you like.
• 2:13
  Speaker 2: But you are also like you've got the background to
• 2:15
  Speaker 2: give advice, which we'll get into later.
• 2:17
  Speaker 3: Yeah, you've also got more kids than us, so ah,
• 2:20
  Speaker 3: I would say that you and they're older, I mean
• 2:22
  Speaker 3: in the hierarchy.
• 2:23
  Speaker 2: I also I feel like you're stronger than both put together.
• 2:31
  Speaker 2: You know, we always ask I guess a question to
• 2:33
  Speaker 2: begin with which is.
• 2:34
  Speaker 3: Yeah, So we want to know what's the most trouble
• 2:38
  Speaker 3: that you can remember getting in as a child?
• 2:42
  Speaker 4: PTSDAR Right now, I'm sorry. I remember when I was
• 2:47
  Speaker 4: I actually can't remember what age I was, but my
• 2:49
  Speaker 4: parents had to go somewhere and I was staying with
• 2:52
  Speaker 4: my grandmother and the power cutout and she needed to
• 2:55
  Speaker 4: light a candle. But the candle was one of those things,
• 2:58
  Speaker 4: you know, those candles. It's like a cup and like
• 3:00
  Speaker 4: the lighting parts like in the cup, so like even
• 3:03
  Speaker 4: if you have a lighter, you can't really light it. Yeah, exactly. Yeah.
• 3:10
  Speaker 4: I thought it was a good idea. So what I
• 3:11
  Speaker 4: got was like one of those sparkling fireworks, and I
• 3:14
  Speaker 4: lit the candle. But then it was one of those
• 3:17
  Speaker 4: you know, I don't know if they sell in Australia
• 3:19
  Speaker 4: because I grew up in Hawaii, so this was in
• 3:21
  Speaker 4: the States, and it's one of those. It's the sparkling
• 3:23
  Speaker 4: but it has like a little paper at the front
• 3:25
  Speaker 4: and once the paper like lights and sparkles, once it
• 3:27
  Speaker 4: hits that part, it goes into like flares and there's
• 3:32
  Speaker 4: no stopping. Yeah, And so I lit that and I
• 3:34
  Speaker 4: lit the candle, and my NaN's like next to Me's
• 3:36
  Speaker 4: like yay, there's light and then it hit the flare
• 3:38
  Speaker 4: pot and it just went but it was all copy it,
• 3:41
  Speaker 4: so just lit the copit.
• 3:42
  Speaker 5: Oh my god, yeah, do you burn down?
• 3:45
  Speaker 4: Yeah? Unfortunately burnt my NaN's hand because you tried to
• 3:48
  Speaker 4: put it out with the pillows and everything, and I froze.
• 3:51
  Speaker 4: I still was like what the hell?
• 3:52
  Speaker 3: And then yeah, usually it's the Usually people used a
• 3:54
  Speaker 3: flame to light the firework, not the firework down the.
• 3:58
  Speaker 4: Opposite opposite it. So yeah, we lit that up and
• 4:01
  Speaker 4: then smoke alarm went off. Everything paniced. Once everything was sorted,
• 4:05
  Speaker 4: I begged my my Nan. I was like, please you
• 4:07
  Speaker 4: I tell my mom and dad when they get home,
• 4:09
  Speaker 4: and she's like, nah, go to bed, it's fine. And
• 4:11
  Speaker 4: then I was walking up.
• 4:12
  Speaker 2: Was Nan like the confident on could she hold onto that?
• 4:15
  Speaker 4: No, she she'd be treated the night I lost my
• 4:19
  Speaker 4: trust for my god. Yeah, I got walking up in
• 4:24
  Speaker 4: a very violent way, flogged into shower, and then yeah,
• 4:28
  Speaker 4: I got in a lot of trouble and my dad
• 4:30
  Speaker 4: sat me down and explained consequences, which just went right
• 4:33
  Speaker 4: over my head. But now that I think back at it,
• 4:35
  Speaker 4: I'm like, oh damn, we could have lost the house,
• 4:38
  Speaker 4: we could have lost my nan, could have lost myself.
• 4:40
  Speaker 2: But it's innocent mistake, I know, it's really what it is.
• 4:44
  Speaker 3: Yeah, like if you I mean, you don't really Yeah,
• 4:46
  Speaker 3: you're right. You don't really think about the consequence. You
• 4:48
  Speaker 3: think about solving the problem.
• 4:50
  Speaker 5: Especially the kiddie, just like, I'll fix it with this.
• 4:52
  Speaker 2: And then just to make you feel better about yourself,
• 4:54
  Speaker 2: me and my brothers, we got about three hundred sparklers,
• 4:58
  Speaker 2: got duct taped them all together.
• 5:00
  Speaker 4: That sounds fun.
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: And then then you put the middle one a little
• 5:02
  Speaker 2: bit higher, and then you put it down somewhere and
• 5:04
  Speaker 2: then you light it. And once that middle one hits
• 5:07
  Speaker 2: the four hundred three hundred, it's really big.
• 5:10
  Speaker 5: This sounds amazing. We should just quit what we're doing.
• 5:13
  Speaker 5: Everyone's going to even I've got a sparkle story. We
• 5:15
  Speaker 5: lit a sparkle ones and it was years even.
• 5:18
  Speaker 3: I was a kid and our back garage had all
• 5:21
  Speaker 3: these dead leaves on it, and someone yeah, so like
• 5:25
  Speaker 3: fling one. The whole garage just went in an instant
• 5:30
  Speaker 3: inflamed as.
• 5:31
  Speaker 2: A young boys to ride a passage, Yeah, to burn.
• 5:38
  Speaker 2: So when did you move from Hawaii?
• 5:40
  Speaker 4: I think I was. I spent thirteen years in Hawaii
• 5:42
  Speaker 4: and then the way things work, like in the Tongan culture,
• 5:46
  Speaker 4: my dad's sister kind of took me in like adopted,
• 5:48
  Speaker 4: like not on paper, but just raised me. And so
• 5:51
  Speaker 4: she moved to Fiji. So, man, if you ask what
• 5:54
  Speaker 4: I've been, I'm like two of the Pacific I've lived
• 5:56
  Speaker 4: in Fiji, New Zealand, Hawaii. So she was her husband
• 6:00
  Speaker 4: was a lecture in USB which is the University of
• 6:02
  Speaker 4: South Pacific, and so we ended up in Fiji and
• 6:05
  Speaker 4: I ended up living with her for like four years.
• 6:07
  Speaker 2: And how does that conversation happen with your sister? And
• 6:10
  Speaker 2: your parents were like, hey, now you're going to go
• 6:12
  Speaker 2: with her to Fiji? Did you? There's a choice for
• 6:15
  Speaker 2: it's just.
• 6:16
  Speaker 4: With the older generation, the Tonga generation, it's kind of
• 6:18
  Speaker 4: like the norm. It's just like, hey, I'm going to
• 6:21
  Speaker 4: take him and raise him. It's brutal way and it's
• 6:26
  Speaker 4: usually like the firstborn or the namesake. So say if
• 6:29
  Speaker 4: if they had a daughter. My parents had a daughter
• 6:31
  Speaker 4: and it was named after my auntie. It's like her,
• 6:33
  Speaker 4: do you just to raise her? And because I was
• 6:35
  Speaker 4: the firstborn, my auntie just took care of me from
• 6:38
  Speaker 4: when I was a baby, and so when she moved
• 6:39
  Speaker 4: to Fiji, it was like, oh, just come live with us,
• 6:42
  Speaker 4: not permanently, but just come live with us. And so
• 6:44
  Speaker 4: I ended up staying four years over there.
• 6:45
  Speaker 3: My question was going to be about, like Fiji and Hawaii.
• 6:48
  Speaker 3: Do you remember which was your favorite as a kid.
• 6:50
  Speaker 4: Yeah, they both have a special place in my heart,
• 6:52
  Speaker 4: but I think Fiji. I was hitting my teenures in Fiji,
• 6:56
  Speaker 4: so there's a lot of my first things are want
• 7:03
  Speaker 4: to get into.
• 7:04
  Speaker 5: Tell us about that.
• 7:06
  Speaker 4: One of my first experiences of life happened in Fiji.
• 7:09
  Speaker 4: So yeah, very cool indeed, And Fiji holds a special place.
• 7:13
  Speaker 4: I do a lot of work in Fiji. I was
• 7:14
  Speaker 4: just there last two weeks. I got to m c
• 7:17
  Speaker 4: EB forty, which is a reggae band, and the Fiji crowd, man,
• 7:20
  Speaker 4: every time I jump on stage, they love me. Yeah
• 7:23
  Speaker 4: that's goods.
• 7:24
  Speaker 2: Engaged in Yeah, Malala Island.
• 7:27
  Speaker 4: Oh well it's beautiful.
• 7:28
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 7:31
  Speaker 2: Where does your allegiance lie? Like Hawaii?
• 7:34
  Speaker 4: Fiji?
• 7:36
  Speaker 5: Worry is pants on.
• 7:44
  Speaker 4: I'm tonguing, so by blood and by culture, I'm tonguing.
• 7:48
  Speaker 4: That's my name. So that six seven six is actually
• 7:50
  Speaker 4: Tonga yeah, And it's crazy because everywhere go nowadays, people
• 7:53
  Speaker 4: think I started that six seven trend and I'm like,
• 7:58
  Speaker 4: I hate that. I have no idea how that came about,
• 8:02
  Speaker 4: but everyone thinks that meets me and sees my name,
• 8:04
  Speaker 4: They're like, oh, did you start that six seven?
• 8:06
  Speaker 2: I'm like to the parents listening, yeah, out there.
• 8:12
  Speaker 5: That's I can't count anymore.
• 8:14
  Speaker 2: And so then when did you end up in Brisbane?
• 8:17
  Speaker 4: So mom and Dad's always they've lived in Australia for years.
• 8:21
  Speaker 4: I remember they made them move I think in nineteen
• 8:22
  Speaker 4: ninety nine, and so the goal was always coming back
• 8:25
  Speaker 4: to Australia to them, which is another tongue and thing.
• 8:28
  Speaker 4: It's like your kids get raised by all these extended
• 8:30
  Speaker 4: family and then when they hit this age, they just
• 8:32
  Speaker 4: come back to mom and dad. Yeah, so that's I
• 8:36
  Speaker 4: came back after high school. I've done my last three
• 8:38
  Speaker 4: years of high school New Zealand and then they've they've
• 8:40
  Speaker 4: been in Perth. So majority of my life in Australia, Perth.
• 8:43
  Speaker 3: Boys from music from Yeah.
• 8:46
  Speaker 4: Yeah, So I've done my university in Perth. I met
• 8:48
  Speaker 4: my wife in Perth, got married, had kids in Perth,
• 8:51
  Speaker 4: and now we live in Queensland, but Perth is kind
• 8:53
  Speaker 4: of like home for me.
• 8:54
  Speaker 2: Yeah, everywhere I talk about Peter. Yeah, beautiful wife. Do
• 8:59
  Speaker 2: you remember how you guys met.
• 9:01
  Speaker 4: Yeah. So I was a bouncer at the nightclub and
• 9:02
  Speaker 4: she was a drunk white girl and basically your typical
• 9:06
  Speaker 4: love story. But so she walked fast. I thought she
• 9:08
  Speaker 4: was trying to get into the club and yeah, you
• 9:18
  Speaker 4: know me, I'm not going to let that.
• 9:19
  Speaker 5: I'm not going to let that.
• 9:23
  Speaker 4: Yeah, So we met there. She came back two weeks
• 9:26
  Speaker 4: later and she's like, oh, do you remember me? And
• 9:28
  Speaker 4: I was like, oh, yeah, I remember you. And we
• 9:30
  Speaker 4: just chatted and then she gave me a number. We
• 9:32
  Speaker 4: stayed in touch and yeah, now four kids later. Wow,
• 9:36
  Speaker 4: that's the love love.
• 9:37
  Speaker 2: Story coming from a relationship that's pretty boring in terms
• 9:41
  Speaker 2: of cultural background. What's it like for yourself mixing your
• 9:46
  Speaker 2: tongue and culture with a white girl.
• 9:49
  Speaker 4: So there's two things. So when Pets came into my life,
• 9:51
  Speaker 4: she had a daughter, and so my family is like
• 9:55
  Speaker 4: this strict Christian you know, don't bring a girl home
• 9:58
  Speaker 4: unless you're going to get married to, don't bring someone
• 10:01
  Speaker 4: home with a child, stay away from girls with tattoos,
• 10:03
  Speaker 4: pets us covered up in tattoos. So everything on the
• 10:06
  Speaker 4: list that my mom told me not to do, I did. Yeah.
• 10:10
  Speaker 4: So now she's like my mom's favorite DoD On law.
• 10:13
  Speaker 4: So it kind of worked that well.
• 10:15
  Speaker 2: But what was that first introduction like?
• 10:17
  Speaker 4: So she found out on Facebook. We went out one
• 10:19
  Speaker 4: night and she took a photo and she tagged me
• 10:21
  Speaker 4: in it. I think at that time Facebook you couldn't
• 10:23
  Speaker 4: approve like who tagged you and couldn't like you know
• 10:26
  Speaker 4: how now when you get tagged, you can approve it,
• 10:27
  Speaker 4: and the shows. It just showed up on my feed
• 10:30
  Speaker 4: and I got a call and my mom's like, Oh,
• 10:31
  Speaker 4: who's that girl?
• 10:32
  Speaker 2: What are you talking about?
• 10:33
  Speaker 4: And I was like, Oh, it's just a friend that
• 10:35
  Speaker 4: I met. She's like, oh, you're pretty cozy with your
• 10:37
  Speaker 4: friend in that photo and I was like, oh no,
• 10:38
  Speaker 4: it's just a friend. And then she started seeing more
• 10:40
  Speaker 4: photos and everything was fine until she's seen a photo.
• 10:44
  Speaker 4: I think she's done her investigation. She went on and
• 10:48
  Speaker 4: she's seen that Peta had a photo with her daughter, Kara,
• 10:50
  Speaker 4: and she's like, hold up, she has a daughter, Like
• 10:53
  Speaker 4: what are you doing? And I was like, Oh, now,
• 10:55
  Speaker 4: we're just talking. It's nothing serious, and she's like, why
• 10:57
  Speaker 4: would you waste her time and waste your time in investing?
• 11:00
  Speaker 4: I think that's not going to be a long run.
• 11:01
  Speaker 4: She's like, you're about to graduate university. You got your
• 11:03
  Speaker 4: whole life ahead. There's so many nice girls you could
• 11:05
  Speaker 4: meet at church, which is ironic because some of the
• 11:08
  Speaker 4: girls I know at church are the devil like church
• 11:13
  Speaker 4: gills man. So she was like, you know, why would
• 11:16
  Speaker 4: you want to bring all that baggage into your life?
• 11:18
  Speaker 4: And I didn't look at it that way, to be fair,
• 11:20
  Speaker 4: that I was at like twenty one, twenty two, so
• 11:22
  Speaker 4: oh wow, I was like, oh, just fun right now.
• 11:25
  Speaker 4: You know, I actually didn't see me getting together with
• 11:27
  Speaker 4: better for like the long run. It was just like, oh,
• 11:30
  Speaker 4: this this is the wave and I'm riding this.
• 11:31
  Speaker 5: Now stop, thank you.
• 11:36
  Speaker 4: Oh my launch.
• 11:40
  Speaker 2: Ashes muzzled in the corner.
• 11:45
  Speaker 5: I'll let that one go.
• 11:47
  Speaker 2: It's really similar. We had Maddie Acton on who similar scenario.
• 11:51
  Speaker 2: His partner had a child and he was like, oh,
• 11:54
  Speaker 2: I wasn't thinking about the added responsibility that was to come.
• 11:57
  Speaker 2: I was just like in the moment, at the moment, yeah,
• 11:59
  Speaker 2: this is fun. Yeah that was literally it. So then
• 12:02
  Speaker 2: when did you realize, oh shit, this is this is serious,
• 12:05
  Speaker 2: and you know I've got to step up potentially.
• 12:09
  Speaker 4: Yeah. Yeah. When she felt pregnant with my first biological daughter,
• 12:12
  Speaker 4: which was like probably after and I was in Hawaii,
• 12:15
  Speaker 4: so this is how bad it was. She sent me
• 12:17
  Speaker 4: back to Hawaii for like a holiday, but it was
• 12:19
  Speaker 4: more to kind of like separate us. So I went
• 12:22
  Speaker 4: back to Hawaii and my family in Hawaii took me out.
• 12:25
  Speaker 4: And it's funny because the next day I get a
• 12:27
  Speaker 4: call from Peta and she's like, I need to tell
• 12:29
  Speaker 4: you something and I was like, what's up and she's like,
• 12:31
  Speaker 4: I'm pregnant and I was like, oh, I didn't realize
• 12:34
  Speaker 4: that at that moment I got back. It kept that
• 12:36
  Speaker 4: news from my parents because there was so many responsibilities
• 12:39
  Speaker 4: put on me. I was the oldest. I was the
• 12:41
  Speaker 4: first one to go to university, and I was an
• 12:43
  Speaker 4: international student as well, studying in Australia. That's I think
• 12:47
  Speaker 4: it was like eleven grand Granda semester. Yeah. My parents
• 12:50
  Speaker 4: were forking that out and they were working on the farm.
• 12:52
  Speaker 4: They were doing like vineyard work, so like majority of
• 12:55
  Speaker 4: the money they had from the savings and stuff was
• 12:57
  Speaker 4: going into my education with the hopes that I would
• 13:00
  Speaker 4: graduate UNI and raise the like lift the family and
• 13:03
  Speaker 4: take them to another level. And so all that pressure
• 13:06
  Speaker 4: came on me and I didn't realize that until I
• 13:08
  Speaker 4: found that Petzel was pregnant because my thoughts were like, one,
• 13:12
  Speaker 4: I have another responsibility, but two, I don't know if
• 13:14
  Speaker 4: they wanted to continue supporting me in university and stuff.
• 13:17
  Speaker 4: So I kept that from them for about two weeks
• 13:19
  Speaker 4: and then I was like, there's no getting out of this.
• 13:22
  Speaker 4: I don't know what it is. Maybe it's my dad,
• 13:23
  Speaker 4: but it's instilled in me, like I have to step
• 13:25
  Speaker 4: up if I'm not going to run away from my responsibility.
• 13:27
  Speaker 4: So I spoke to mom, shattered her like she thought
• 13:31
  Speaker 4: it was the end of the world. She didn't want
• 13:32
  Speaker 4: to speak to me. My dad, on the other hand,
• 13:34
  Speaker 4: he was really understanding and he's like, oh, you'll be right,
• 13:36
  Speaker 4: like we'll sort it out, which was crazy because I
• 13:39
  Speaker 4: actually thought they were going to kick me, like tell
• 13:40
  Speaker 4: me stop going to UNI.
• 13:42
  Speaker 2: Like that's it hurts me because that news normally is.
• 13:46
  Speaker 4: A joyful Yeah, yeah, it must be.
• 13:48
  Speaker 3: I mean you were still quite young, so even like
• 13:52
  Speaker 3: stepping up and saying, hey, this is where we're are.
• 13:56
  Speaker 3: That shows serious maturity because we all know there's a
• 13:59
  Speaker 3: lot of people that wouldn't that hard as much as
• 14:01
  Speaker 3: they can and try and escape their problems, but I
• 14:03
  Speaker 3: think like hitting them straight on just.
• 14:06
  Speaker 4: Sort of character you are. For sure. Yeah, I was left.
• 14:08
  Speaker 4: I had no other options, so I just thought it'd
• 14:11
  Speaker 4: be easier to just keep it real. But it's amazing
• 14:13
  Speaker 4: because the moment my mom found out that Petzel was pregnant,
• 14:16
  Speaker 4: she was like, we can't just leave Petta and that's
• 14:19
  Speaker 4: our granddaughter. So she made the trip to Perth to
• 14:21
  Speaker 4: see Pezza. She went over. Petze was like, I think
• 14:23
  Speaker 4: she was like four or five months pregnant, and she
• 14:25
  Speaker 4: met Kiara, who's Pezza's daughter, And from that moment my
• 14:28
  Speaker 4: parents just flipped and was like, Petsa's our daughter, Kiara's
• 14:31
  Speaker 4: her first granddaughter, and the babies that come along the
• 14:34
  Speaker 4: way is our grandkids. There's no other way. They didn't
• 14:36
  Speaker 4: tell me to marry her. They were just like, you know,
• 14:38
  Speaker 4: just do the right thing. If you love this woman
• 14:41
  Speaker 4: and you can see yourself being with her for the
• 14:42
  Speaker 4: rest of your life, then that's on you. So yeah,
• 14:46
  Speaker 4: we had Nini, who's my second daughter, my first biological daughter,
• 14:50
  Speaker 4: and then we got married like a year after I'm
• 14:52
  Speaker 4: having her, and yeah, the rest is history. But that
• 14:55
  Speaker 4: was how she came into my life and my family's life.
• 14:58
  Speaker 4: A lot of the changes and stuff, it was her
• 15:00
  Speaker 4: because she had to adapt to everything that I brought
• 15:02
  Speaker 4: to the table, not only my culture dynamics, but my
• 15:05
  Speaker 4: family dynamics. I'm really close with my parents, I'm really
• 15:08
  Speaker 4: close with my siblings, and as I mentioned before, I
• 15:10
  Speaker 4: am the eldest. There's so much responsibility on me and
• 15:13
  Speaker 4: so man, I mean we've been together thirteen years now,
• 15:16
  Speaker 4: so she obviously hasn't kicked the bucket and been like
• 15:19
  Speaker 4: stuff done, and I'm done, not just married to you,
• 15:22
  Speaker 4: but married to your family as well, because my even
• 15:24
  Speaker 4: till now, man, my parents and my siblings, they have
• 15:26
  Speaker 4: such a big say in my life. And I've learned
• 15:28
  Speaker 4: this over the years, which Petter has taught me where
• 15:30
  Speaker 4: to draw the line as well. But at the start,
• 15:32
  Speaker 4: it always used to be like, no, whatever my family says,
• 15:34
  Speaker 4: we're going with that, Like, yeah, my girls are named
• 15:37
  Speaker 4: the tongue and way, so the tongue in the way.
• 15:39
  Speaker 4: It goes back to how I said, your aunties play
• 15:41
  Speaker 4: a big role. My sister's named my girls. It wasn't Peta,
• 15:45
  Speaker 4: and that's that's a tongue and culture thing, and that
• 15:49
  Speaker 4: was that difficult for Peter, was very difficult. Like the
• 15:52
  Speaker 4: first child, when Nini was born, pet I was like
• 15:54
  Speaker 4: coming up from names.
• 15:55
  Speaker 6: I was like, I didn't do that would have even probably,
• 16:00
  Speaker 6: but I was like, listen, I was like, in our culture,
• 16:04
  Speaker 6: my sister names the kids, and I was like, what
• 16:06
  Speaker 6: the hell.
• 16:07
  Speaker 4: I was like, you know, just this child, the next one,
• 16:10
  Speaker 4: then we will think about it. Like the next one came,
• 16:13
  Speaker 4: it's like.
• 16:13
  Speaker 2: Your fingers and toes, you know.
• 16:16
  Speaker 4: It was literally a second child came. I was like,
• 16:18
  Speaker 4: remember that conversation we had, but she's yeah, she just
• 16:21
  Speaker 4: took everything on and I know it wasn't easy, Like
• 16:24
  Speaker 4: as the years ago and I look back on it,
• 16:26
  Speaker 4: some of it, I'm like, damn one, I can't believe
• 16:29
  Speaker 4: I let that kind of stuff happen. Not in a
• 16:31
  Speaker 4: bad way, because that's my culture, and I like that's
• 16:33
  Speaker 4: all I knew. But like when I think about it
• 16:35
  Speaker 4: and I think about my girls because I'm a girl dad,
• 16:37
  Speaker 4: I'm like, bir if one of her husbands did that,
• 16:39
  Speaker 4: I'll be like what, Yeah, no, no, it doesn't work
• 16:43
  Speaker 4: like that.
• 16:43
  Speaker 2: I guess as well, because like in Western culture, there's
• 16:46
  Speaker 2: a real separation of when you're old enough to not
• 16:49
  Speaker 2: be at home anymore, you then completely cut ties of
• 16:52
  Speaker 2: how your parents will dictate your life exactly, which is opposite.
• 16:55
  Speaker 4: The total opposite. I mean, I'm thereaty six right now.
• 16:57
  Speaker 4: My mom still has to say my videos. Ah, I'll
• 17:00
  Speaker 4: do a video and she'll be like message me like
• 17:01
  Speaker 4: I think that's inappropriate, and I'm looking at the video,
• 17:04
  Speaker 4: I'm like, man, that's doing so well in the algorithm.
• 17:06
  Speaker 4: She's like, deleted it. I'm like, ah, shucks it. So yeah,
• 17:10
  Speaker 4: they have a big saying hey PETA's yeah, she's a legenday.
• 17:14
  Speaker 5: Do you remember what it was like.
• 17:15
  Speaker 3: I mean, obviously she had a daughter already, and then
• 17:19
  Speaker 3: you started seeing each other. Do you remember what it
• 17:21
  Speaker 3: was like taking on that responsibility of an instant family.
• 17:25
  Speaker 4: Yeah. It's funny because I nowadays, with my content and stuff,
• 17:28
  Speaker 4: I get complimented like, oh, you're such an amazing dad
• 17:31
  Speaker 4: and stuff. But a lot of that has to go
• 17:33
  Speaker 4: back to my first daughter, to PETA's daughter. She I
• 17:36
  Speaker 4: was chucked in the deep end, and I didn't realize
• 17:39
  Speaker 4: all those responsibilities until I moved in with her, because
• 17:43
  Speaker 4: at the start, when we're first dating, I stayed in
• 17:44
  Speaker 4: my own place. She's stayed in their place. I used
• 17:46
  Speaker 4: to go over on the weekend and you know, just
• 17:47
  Speaker 4: be the fun guy that's coming in doing a barbecue,
• 17:50
  Speaker 4: swinging in the pool and stuff and then out.
• 17:52
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 17:52
  Speaker 4: And then when I moved in and it's like Monday
• 17:55
  Speaker 4: morning hit and Petrol's already up and I'm like still
• 17:57
  Speaker 4: lying in bed, like scrolling, and like, what are you
• 17:59
  Speaker 4: doing to make lunch? I got to, you know, do
• 18:01
  Speaker 4: school lunch. I got a prep care for school. And
• 18:04
  Speaker 4: at first I was just like, oh sweet. And then
• 18:07
  Speaker 4: a time came and I was like shocks, like because
• 18:08
  Speaker 4: she was heavily pregnant. So I had to step up.
• 18:11
  Speaker 4: I had to do the school lunches. I had to
• 18:13
  Speaker 4: take care of school and stuff like that. And as
• 18:15
  Speaker 4: I was doing it, I was like, Wow, this is
• 18:17
  Speaker 4: actually hot day. Yeah, shocks, this is this is hard work.
• 18:21
  Speaker 4: But once again that integrity, whatever my dad's instilled in
• 18:24
  Speaker 4: me growing up, I was like, man, I just got
• 18:27
  Speaker 4: a man up and step up for Kiara, because I
• 18:29
  Speaker 4: know that Nini is going to be born, and I
• 18:31
  Speaker 4: guess in a way, what I do for Kiara is
• 18:34
  Speaker 4: what I'm going to be doing for Nini. So but
• 18:36
  Speaker 4: that definitely took a toll. Like and another thing Petza
• 18:39
  Speaker 4: used to mention was I was totally blind to I
• 18:41
  Speaker 4: used to go out a lot when we were still
• 18:43
  Speaker 4: in the dating phase, and when we did move in together,
• 18:45
  Speaker 4: I still try to go out a lot because UNI life.
• 18:48
  Speaker 4: I was in my last year of UNI and all
• 18:49
  Speaker 4: the boys, yeah twenty two years and the boys were
• 18:52
  Speaker 4: like drinking and stuff, and like, oh, bro, we're at
• 18:54
  Speaker 4: the pub tonight and I'll just dress up. I didn't
• 18:55
  Speaker 4: even think like it was disrespectful or anything to Petza,
• 18:59
  Speaker 4: and she was heavy pregnant as well, and I'll be like,
• 19:01
  Speaker 4: I'm just gonna shoot off, just gonna have a few
• 19:02
  Speaker 4: years and then get back and not even to complain
• 19:05
  Speaker 4: or anything, which is why I thought it was the norm.
• 19:06
  Speaker 4: I was like, Oh, this is this is cool, this
• 19:08
  Speaker 4: is easy life. And then later on down the line,
• 19:10
  Speaker 4: I was like, damn. I was actually tough to say,
• 19:12
  Speaker 4: but I was a pretty shitty boyfriend husband at the time. Mate.
• 19:15
  Speaker 4: So Kiara definitely made me step up to the dad role.
• 19:18
  Speaker 4: And pull my big boy pants on. Yeah, and show up.
• 19:21
  Speaker 4: Show up was definitely something I had to do.
• 19:24
  Speaker 2: That's hard to admit.
• 19:25
  Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, for sure.
• 19:26
  Speaker 3: I mean it's it's so good that you're like again,
• 19:29
  Speaker 3: maturity and integrity, self reflection.
• 19:31
  Speaker 5: Yeah, you're self reflecting. How old was she when.
• 19:32
  Speaker 4: You moved you or seven when?
• 19:35
  Speaker 1: Yeah?
• 19:36
  Speaker 4: Wow?
• 19:36
  Speaker 3: So like yeah, second year of school is second or
• 19:38
  Speaker 3: third year of school?
• 19:39
  Speaker 4: Like real demands?
• 19:41
  Speaker 3: Yeah, man, Like I think like for me, like now
• 19:43
  Speaker 3: that they're going to school and all the lunches and stuff,
• 19:45
  Speaker 3: I found I adapted that part.
• 19:47
  Speaker 5: Of their life way more than their their earlier years.
• 19:50
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 19:51
  Speaker 3: Yeah, but like, yeah, you're stepping into it as a
• 19:53
  Speaker 3: twenty two There's no way I could have done that.
• 19:55
  Speaker 3: And I think a lot of men would have thought
• 19:57
  Speaker 3: the same thing because that was the norm, right it
• 19:59
  Speaker 3: still going twenty two life?
• 20:02
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and say I only cared about myself, that's yeah.
• 20:06
  Speaker 2: I only when I was hitting thirty, I was like, oh,
• 20:08
  Speaker 2: there's other people in the world that I should care about.
• 20:13
  Speaker 2: Do you find it hard now not to put the
• 20:16
  Speaker 2: same amount of pressure that you had as an eldest
• 20:18
  Speaker 2: child on your eldest door.
• 20:21
  Speaker 4: Not only my eldest. But oh, my girls. It's funny
• 20:23
  Speaker 4: because I was brought up that way and I don't
• 20:24
  Speaker 4: hold my parents. I don't hold them to that because
• 20:26
  Speaker 4: that's all they knew. But I definitely do not put
• 20:30
  Speaker 4: that pressure. When it comes to sports. I find myself
• 20:32
  Speaker 4: getting in that, especially my daughter Ninny, because she's playing
• 20:35
  Speaker 4: rugby and stuff, and there's there's never a game that's
• 20:38
  Speaker 4: good enough. Every game she plays, I'm like, could have
• 20:40
  Speaker 4: done better? Better, And then we get in the car
• 20:42
  Speaker 4: because it looks at me and she's like, you need
• 20:44
  Speaker 4: to chill the hell down. And it's funny because my
• 20:47
  Speaker 4: girls are so sassy too, so they clap back, not
• 20:50
  Speaker 4: at times when I'm having that serious chat, and I'm like, bro,
• 20:52
  Speaker 4: we didn't drive all this way for you to walk around.
• 20:54
  Speaker 4: We didn't pay all this stuff and pay the toll
• 20:57
  Speaker 4: for you to just walk around on the field. Like,
• 20:59
  Speaker 4: get in there if you want to play, play if
• 21:00
  Speaker 4: you don't, don't waste that time. But when when they
• 21:03
  Speaker 4: do get the moment to like clap back there and
• 21:05
  Speaker 4: be like, are you're authorritis because you can't even That's
• 21:10
  Speaker 4: very true. Yeah, But back in my days when it
• 21:13
  Speaker 4: went unfortunately, there was no camera around, but you would
• 21:15
  Speaker 4: have seen.
• 21:20
  Speaker 2: With Melee, she's had her challenges with their health, with
• 21:24
  Speaker 2: their kidneys. Can you explain what she had to go through?
• 21:27
  Speaker 4: Yeah, she kept getting sick, and then my wife took
• 21:31
  Speaker 4: her to the doctors, which was crazy because as a parent,
• 21:34
  Speaker 4: you guys would know, like, you take them to the doctors,
• 21:36
  Speaker 4: you expect you know, quick fix panandle the sweeters. And
• 21:40
  Speaker 4: we went to the doctors and then they were like, oh,
• 21:42
  Speaker 4: we need to do some blood tests came back and
• 21:44
  Speaker 4: then they're like, we needed this further test and stuff,
• 21:46
  Speaker 4: and I was like, oh, it sucks. And it turned
• 21:49
  Speaker 4: out that one of her kidney, the tube, it was tangled,
• 21:52
  Speaker 4: but it was like deformed, like it wasn't growing the
• 21:55
  Speaker 4: right way it should be growing, and so it was
• 21:57
  Speaker 4: preventing her from like releasing all the toxins through her,
• 22:01
  Speaker 4: like urine and stuff. And so every time she needed
• 22:03
  Speaker 4: to go tell and stuff release talksins, some of the
• 22:05
  Speaker 4: toxins were staying back and eventually down the line, too
• 22:08
  Speaker 4: much talksin obviously would be bad for the kidneys. And
• 22:11
  Speaker 4: so when we found that out, she wasn't even one
• 22:12
  Speaker 4: at the time, and they're like, oh, she needs to
• 22:14
  Speaker 4: do major surgery. We need to cut her open and
• 22:16
  Speaker 4: put like a stint or something like that to help
• 22:19
  Speaker 4: the kidney and put all this medication to help the
• 22:21
  Speaker 4: tube to kind of like go back into its normal position.
• 22:23
  Speaker 4: And then after that we need to do a surgery
• 22:25
  Speaker 4: again and take the step out. And like just hearing
• 22:27
  Speaker 4: that when she barely turned one, me and Peta were like,
• 22:30
  Speaker 4: what the hell? But she she went through the surgery
• 22:33
  Speaker 4: and the thing they told us was majority of her life,
• 22:37
  Speaker 4: she's gonna have issues with the kidney. So even after
• 22:39
  Speaker 4: the surgery and stuff, we have to keep getting her
• 22:41
  Speaker 4: checked and so that that was a pretty brutal time.
• 22:43
  Speaker 4: But man, she's a tough girl because literally the day
• 22:46
  Speaker 4: she came out of surgery, she took her first step. Yeah,
• 22:51
  Speaker 4: that was crazy. As soon as I've seen that, I
• 22:53
  Speaker 4: was like, Yep, this is a girl you don't want
• 22:54
  Speaker 4: to mess with.
• 22:57
  Speaker 2: How did you know she was?
• 22:58
  Speaker 4: Well?
• 22:58
  Speaker 2: If she only won? Obviously can't communicate, so what was sentence?
• 23:03
  Speaker 4: She was just feverish, getting sick. She had a lot
• 23:05
  Speaker 4: of fevering and we thought it was teething, so we
• 23:08
  Speaker 4: took it to the doctors and then he done his
• 23:10
  Speaker 4: obs and then I remember, I think it was the
• 23:12
  Speaker 4: third time we took it to the doctors, and he's like,
• 23:14
  Speaker 4: take her to the hospital. And then we went to
• 23:16
  Speaker 4: the hospital and everything just hit from there. And it
• 23:19
  Speaker 4: was crazy because I was still like young at the
• 23:22
  Speaker 4: time and like, this is my first time experiencing like
• 23:24
  Speaker 4: one of our girls getting not just your average sickness.
• 23:27
  Speaker 4: It was like something that could be life threatening or
• 23:30
  Speaker 4: something that's ongoing throughout the life. And so Mela, she's
• 23:33
  Speaker 4: a man. She's she's got a She's a very emotional girl.
• 23:37
  Speaker 4: So if you guys see my videos, anything we do
• 23:39
  Speaker 4: for her, she cries, she bowls down, and it always
• 23:42
  Speaker 4: shatters my heart. And I'm like, oh man, she's the
• 23:43
  Speaker 4: one that like appreciates the little things, which is funny
• 23:46
  Speaker 4: because we didn't like raise her that way to like
• 23:49
  Speaker 4: be like that, But I guess she subconsciously knows, like,
• 23:52
  Speaker 4: you know, life is so much more pressure than it is.
• 23:54
  Speaker 3: It's crazy to think, like at one year old, you're
• 23:58
  Speaker 3: going taking your daughter to hospital to go under a
• 24:03
  Speaker 3: major and you know, knowing that like well, not knowing
• 24:06
  Speaker 3: what's gonna happen and how it's going to play out.
• 24:09
  Speaker 3: And I can imagine, do you remember how you felt
• 24:12
  Speaker 3: the day of when that was all unfolding.
• 24:14
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I kind of. Some moms might go to so
• 24:17
  Speaker 4: I can imagine I would have called him board my
• 24:20
  Speaker 4: eyes up, because that's I call mom, win or lost.
• 24:23
  Speaker 4: It's always heard that I call. So I remember calling
• 24:26
  Speaker 4: her before Ninia was born and all my girls. But
• 24:29
  Speaker 4: I assume I would have called her and just bored,
• 24:31
  Speaker 4: and she would have just been like, all good. She's
• 24:32
  Speaker 4: a very strong woman of faith, So I have my
• 24:35
  Speaker 4: own faith as well, and I believe everything will fall
• 24:38
  Speaker 4: in place, whether it's the way it is or the
• 24:40
  Speaker 4: way it's not meant that you think it's going to be.
• 24:42
  Speaker 4: I believe something will fall in the right place. And
• 24:45
  Speaker 4: humans are interesting, man. We we somehow find our own
• 24:48
  Speaker 4: way to cope with things, or we hope that you
• 24:51
  Speaker 4: find your own way to cope with things. So as
• 24:53
  Speaker 4: much as it was a tough time, yeah, obviously we've
• 24:56
  Speaker 4: got through it and we're you know, she's good. She's healthy. Now.
• 24:59
  Speaker 4: We got news when she was about six that everything
• 25:02
  Speaker 4: was good. That was her last check up, and they're like,
• 25:04
  Speaker 4: everything looks normal, So fingers crossed. No complications down the line.
• 25:08
  Speaker 4: But so far everything is good.
• 25:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so hard with parenting, especially young kids, when you
• 25:17
  Speaker 2: can't appreciate every moment. You know, there's so many nights
• 25:20
  Speaker 2: where I'm I'm like praying for them to go to
• 25:23
  Speaker 2: sleep and stay asleep, and it's nine o'clock and they're
• 25:25
  Speaker 2: still awake. And then it's so hard in those situations
• 25:29
  Speaker 2: where it's a life threatening situation where you're like, I
• 25:33
  Speaker 2: wish I appreciate it every little more and so hard.
• 25:37
  Speaker 2: That's what makes the guilt makes it so much more tough.
• 25:40
  Speaker 4: Yeah, one thing I say with my kids, Man, they
• 25:42
  Speaker 4: boil your blood, but they melt your heart well said, Yeah,
• 25:46
  Speaker 4: it's a love hate relationship. Last night we came back
• 25:49
  Speaker 4: from the airport, Like went on the way from the airport, man,
• 25:51
  Speaker 4: I was sitting in the cause quiet the whole time.
• 25:53
  Speaker 4: My wife was like, you're good. And it's because they
• 25:55
  Speaker 4: were just bitching in the back the whole time. Who
• 25:57
  Speaker 4: were supposed to sit in the middle, Who's getting the
• 25:59
  Speaker 4: bunk bed at the hotel? All this stuff. And I'm
• 26:01
  Speaker 4: realizing the older they get, the more of a stimulated
• 26:04
  Speaker 4: I get. Because they're all girls and it's like I'm
• 26:07
  Speaker 4: just driving and my wife looked over and she's like,
• 26:09
  Speaker 4: you're good, and I was like, yeah, yeah, you look
• 26:12
  Speaker 4: all good. She's like did I did I do something
• 26:17
  Speaker 4: or say something wrong? I was like no, no, you're
• 26:19
  Speaker 4: a good baby. But she's like, yeah, okay. So yeah,
• 26:24
  Speaker 4: there's those moments where you're just like, get the hell
• 26:27
  Speaker 4: out of my face, and then they do something and
• 26:29
  Speaker 4: you're like cap.
• 26:30
  Speaker 3: Yeah, especially girls, man, like I've got I've got one
• 26:33
  Speaker 3: of the.
• 26:33
  Speaker 2: Age and sorry, especially girls.
• 26:37
  Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean, let.
• 26:41
  Speaker 3: Me finish first, I say, especially with girls, and they
• 26:46
  Speaker 3: like my daughter melts my heart man, like she oscar,
• 26:49
  Speaker 3: I find that I am you.
• 26:50
  Speaker 2: Don't love them as much.
• 26:51
  Speaker 5: Yeah, I have a favorite, A favorite.
• 26:54
  Speaker 4: I said it.
• 26:55
  Speaker 3: I said it, I have a favorite. Sorry, Cup, you
• 26:57
  Speaker 3: will be my favorite when you're older. But yeah, you're right,
• 27:01
  Speaker 3: like just all of a sudden, they can melt your
• 27:03
  Speaker 3: back down.
• 27:04
  Speaker 4: But we ask her.
• 27:04
  Speaker 5: I'm like, you need to try harder than that. Bro,
• 27:05
  Speaker 5: you're gonna melt my heart.
• 27:09
  Speaker 4: Man, baby, sit in my nephews. I guess I'm so
• 27:11
  Speaker 4: used to go. It requires so much more energy. They
• 27:15
  Speaker 4: can't just my girls can sit there and watch TV
• 27:18
  Speaker 4: or play with something. This guy has to break something
• 27:20
  Speaker 4: or touch something, and I'm always like stop, stop that bro,
• 27:23
  Speaker 4: sit down, stop that stone.
• 27:25
  Speaker 2: Stop until you yell at them they break something or
• 27:28
  Speaker 2: they hurt themselves exactly. They could be like making a
• 27:31
  Speaker 2: sandwich and you're like, okay, great. Then you turn around they're.
• 27:34
  Speaker 4: Like throwing like fu.
• 27:37
  Speaker 5: Yeahs is great.
• 27:40
  Speaker 4: It is great.
• 27:42
  Speaker 2: I've got to give you a massive rundom applause. Ash
• 27:44
  Speaker 2: and I obviously in the content game, but what you've
• 27:48
  Speaker 2: achieved in a couple of years is incredible and you're
• 27:51
  Speaker 2: a very humble man. But watching from the sidelines, it
• 27:55
  Speaker 2: is so fucking amazing how you're still so humble, still
• 27:59
  Speaker 2: so ice and kind with the accolades that you're clocking up.
• 28:03
  Speaker 2: I was at the TikTok Awards this year and one
• 28:06
  Speaker 2: thing I loved it was one of the highlights was
• 28:08
  Speaker 2: your speech. And I'm going to play you just a
• 28:10
  Speaker 2: little section that you said.
• 28:12
  Speaker 4: You're gonna get me a tiara. Now, you guys want
• 28:15
  Speaker 4: to know, there's the true stars on my show, and
• 28:18
  Speaker 4: it's beautiful daughters, Liliar, Luni and Melia. I love you
• 28:27
  Speaker 4: guys so much.
• 28:28
  Speaker 6: Oh, I'm so grateful to me or Dad, I'm so
• 28:34
  Speaker 6: grateful that you guys get to.
• 28:35
  Speaker 4: Be up here tonight. Damn you guys. Don't make me
• 28:37
  Speaker 4: crying this you guys, that's a reminder to you girls
• 28:41
  Speaker 4: that if I can do it, you girls can definitely
• 28:43
  Speaker 4: do it. I love you guys so much to kind
• 28:46
  Speaker 4: of celebrate with you all.
• 28:48
  Speaker 2: Why is it so important in that situation to show
• 28:52
  Speaker 2: your girls what you're able to achieve based on where
• 28:55
  Speaker 2: you've come from.
• 28:56
  Speaker 4: I don't know, man, I just that's a great question. Basically,
• 29:03
  Speaker 4: I try to show them every day that, like like
• 29:06
  Speaker 4: I said in my speech, if I can do something,
• 29:09
  Speaker 4: the only way I would have corrected that is they
• 29:10
  Speaker 4: can do it better. Not that I only know that
• 29:12
  Speaker 4: they can do it better, but I got as much
• 29:14
  Speaker 4: confidence in myself without saying being cocky or anything like that.
• 29:17
  Speaker 4: I got much confidence in myself to say that I
• 29:20
  Speaker 4: willn't sure that they will do it better and raise
• 29:22
  Speaker 4: them to do it better, but they live by what
• 29:24
  Speaker 4: they see, and I just hope that everything I do
• 29:27
  Speaker 4: they kind of look at it that way because I
• 29:29
  Speaker 4: look at my dad that way. And it's funny because
• 29:32
  Speaker 4: when it comes to my parents' moms might go to
• 29:35
  Speaker 4: I never have an emotional chat with my dad like
• 29:38
  Speaker 4: till even till now. We never sit down. We either
• 29:41
  Speaker 4: talk about rugby, talk about the kids, talk about the weather, anything,
• 29:44
  Speaker 4: but talk about feelings. But like the day I became
• 29:48
  Speaker 4: a dad, I don't know, I don't know which moment
• 29:50
  Speaker 4: it was the day I became a dad. Throughout my
• 29:53
  Speaker 4: life of being a dad, I've never appreciated him so
• 29:55
  Speaker 4: much more than there's so much stuff that I realized
• 29:57
  Speaker 4: that he's done. Frick wasn't that water bro something in
• 30:05
  Speaker 4: that world? Oh?
• 30:09
  Speaker 3: Sorry, boys, Usually Matt cries, take your time.
• 30:18
  Speaker 4: Yeah, me and my dad never see I don't I
• 30:21
  Speaker 4: we never really chat about, like I guess, the important
• 30:26
  Speaker 4: things if you say. But I remember there was a
• 30:30
  Speaker 4: moment where throughout my fatherhood I realized, like sucks, there
• 30:35
  Speaker 4: was so much crap that like this man did for
• 30:38
  Speaker 4: me that I didn't even realize. And like, you know,
• 30:41
  Speaker 4: as much as I show up for my girls, as
• 30:43
  Speaker 4: much as I do everything for them, there's a lot
• 30:46
  Speaker 4: of like behind the scene stuff that they probably will
• 30:50
  Speaker 4: never see and sadly the girls they probably would never
• 30:54
  Speaker 4: experience as well. But I've never appreciated my dad so
• 30:57
  Speaker 4: much until I became a dad and I realized, like damn,
• 31:00
  Speaker 4: there's a lot of stuff done in the dock. That one.
• 31:03
  Speaker 4: He's never like raised it. And my mom's always been
• 31:06
  Speaker 4: one to be like, I work so hard, I do this,
• 31:08
  Speaker 4: I do that. My Dad's just I must shut my
• 31:11
  Speaker 4: mouth and get shit done. And that's kind of my
• 31:13
  Speaker 4: mentality with the way I'm a dad. I mean, yeah,
• 31:16
  Speaker 4: I tell the girls, damn me, all are expensive, bro.
• 31:19
  Speaker 4: But with that being said, like I I buckle down.
• 31:22
  Speaker 4: If there's something that I have to do for my girls,
• 31:24
  Speaker 4: I buckle down and just get it done. If there's
• 31:25
  Speaker 4: something I have to do for my wife, I buckle
• 31:27
  Speaker 4: down and get it done. And a lot of the
• 31:29
  Speaker 4: characteristics I have as a father comes from my dad
• 31:32
  Speaker 4: one hundred percent. So yeah, that's why I think I
• 31:34
  Speaker 4: got emotionally because I was like, sucks. I remember very
• 31:37
  Speaker 4: there was something I did and I sat in the
• 31:39
  Speaker 4: car and I was like, damn, like I feel like
• 31:41
  Speaker 4: no one's appreciative of me, Like no one my wife
• 31:44
  Speaker 4: and the girls. No one's like giving me my flowers.
• 31:48
  Speaker 4: And then I immediately thought about my dad and I
• 31:51
  Speaker 4: was like, shit, I wonder if this is how he felt.
• 31:54
  Speaker 4: And it's funny because immediately I had to snap, and
• 31:56
  Speaker 4: I was like stopping a little bitch, bro, just freaking
• 31:58
  Speaker 4: whether you get flowers not, this is what you have
• 32:00
  Speaker 4: to do. Get it done.
• 32:02
  Speaker 3: You mentioned something before, you said that I never had
• 32:05
  Speaker 3: those emotional chats with my dad like you did with
• 32:07
  Speaker 3: your mom. Do you think being a dad now and
• 32:11
  Speaker 3: as your girls grow, you want your girls to be
• 32:13
  Speaker 3: able to have that chat.
• 32:15
  Speaker 4: Yeah. So that's something that I ensure all the time.
• 32:18
  Speaker 4: We have a safety word. It's called marshmellow, and I
• 32:21
  Speaker 4: tell my girls, I know there's times you feel like
• 32:23
  Speaker 4: you can't be straight up with dad or you're scared
• 32:25
  Speaker 4: that you're going to get in trouble, and if it
• 32:27
  Speaker 4: comes at time, just say my shmellow and I'll know,
• 32:30
  Speaker 4: like one, shut the hell up. Two, do not get angry,
• 32:33
  Speaker 4: even if I need to step away a bit and
• 32:35
  Speaker 4: kind of breathe and stuff, But just say my smeller
• 32:36
  Speaker 4: and I know what you mean. But it's definitely something
• 32:39
  Speaker 4: that I It's not that I craved for to have
• 32:41
  Speaker 4: with my dad because I had it with mom, but
• 32:42
  Speaker 4: it's definitely something that I wish my girls never feel,
• 32:46
  Speaker 4: because there's been times when my mom's not around and
• 32:48
  Speaker 4: I needed to like vent I needed to speak to
• 32:50
  Speaker 4: someone and I couldn't go to dad just because I
• 32:52
  Speaker 4: was like, no, we don't really do that. Yeah, And
• 32:54
  Speaker 4: so I never want my girls to feel that way, like, oh,
• 32:56
  Speaker 4: I can't come talk to dad because we don't really
• 32:59
  Speaker 4: do that. And so so far, I mean, I'm not
• 33:02
  Speaker 4: even Kira, she's twenty now, but we're pretty we're pretty
• 33:05
  Speaker 4: tight in terms of like her being comfortable or like
• 33:08
  Speaker 4: call me or talk to me about something big that's
• 33:11
  Speaker 4: going on in her life. And with that being with her, like,
• 33:13
  Speaker 4: I kind of feel like these girls will kind of
• 33:15
  Speaker 4: have that same logic as well. Yeah.
• 33:17
  Speaker 5: I think it's a father and son dynamic.
• 33:20
  Speaker 3: It's really rare to see them communicate like we would
• 33:24
  Speaker 3: do with our mums.
• 33:25
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 33:26
  Speaker 3: I remember my dad when his dad died. He said
• 33:28
  Speaker 3: to me, I don't remember the last time I hugged
• 33:29
  Speaker 3: my father, And.
• 33:31
  Speaker 5: He said to me, I don't want to be like that.
• 33:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 33:33
  Speaker 3: And when you started to talk about your dad, and
• 33:36
  Speaker 3: now that we're all dads, you want your kids to
• 33:39
  Speaker 3: Every parent wants their kid to be able to come
• 33:41
  Speaker 3: to them with whatever it is. And the fact you've
• 33:43
  Speaker 3: got a safe word, you're doing all this sort of stuff.
• 33:45
  Speaker 3: There'd be dads and mums listening to this right now saying, well,
• 33:48
  Speaker 3: you know, these relationships moving forward we're going to have
• 33:50
  Speaker 3: and they're going to be open and much more accepting,
• 33:53
  Speaker 3: and the communication is going to be free flowing, which
• 33:55
  Speaker 3: is so healthy for everyone.
• 33:56
  Speaker 2: I think, yeah, he must be so proud as well,
• 34:01
  Speaker 2: seeing where you're at now with your family, and even like,
• 34:03
  Speaker 2: I couldn't believe how well you spoke in front of
• 34:05
  Speaker 2: twenty thousand people. I was like, damn, he's good. But
• 34:12
  Speaker 2: also now I live with my mum and she does
• 34:16
  Speaker 2: so much and I even just then was thinking I
• 34:18
  Speaker 2: need to tell her. Last night she was cooking dinner
• 34:21
  Speaker 2: and I was like, I told you I didn't like colidflower.
• 34:26
  Speaker 5: Wow, I wanted my bread cut of the tryer.
• 34:30
  Speaker 2: I better call her on the drive home today. You
• 34:37
  Speaker 2: the amount of success that you had can be a
• 34:39
  Speaker 2: double edged sword because it creates so many opportunities that
• 34:42
  Speaker 2: you wouldn't have had otherwise. But at the same time,
• 34:44
  Speaker 2: you're talking to an audience of literally millions and with
• 34:48
  Speaker 2: your girls like they're amazing on camera, their personalities are
• 34:52
  Speaker 2: just incredible. But then with that fame also comes from
• 34:57
  Speaker 2: criticism and fully happy. Yeah, how do you manage that?
• 35:01
  Speaker 4: First of all, my girls, the three younger ones, they
• 35:04
  Speaker 4: don't have gadgets at all, so they don't do iPads,
• 35:07
  Speaker 4: they don't do phones. The only way they watch stuff
• 35:11
  Speaker 4: on social media is if they're watching YouTube shorts in
• 35:13
  Speaker 4: the lounge of us, or if I'm scrolling on my
• 35:16
  Speaker 4: phone and they're watching with me. So in that sense,
• 35:19
  Speaker 4: it's good. Because Nini, who's in just got into high school.
• 35:22
  Speaker 4: She already had incidents at school where people are like
• 35:24
  Speaker 4: creating memes of her and stuff like that, and she
• 35:26
  Speaker 4: had no idea of and so she came home and
• 35:29
  Speaker 4: she's like, apparently there's like videos of and stuff like
• 35:32
  Speaker 4: people screenshotting dad's photos and like making a meme out
• 35:35
  Speaker 4: of like my facials and stuff like that. And so
• 35:38
  Speaker 4: my wife tried to deal with it through the school
• 35:39
  Speaker 4: and stuff. But I asked Ninia, I was like, how
• 35:42
  Speaker 4: do you feel about that? And she's like, I don't
• 35:44
  Speaker 4: really care. I can't see it, And so I guess
• 35:46
  Speaker 4: that that works well. But with that being said, she
• 35:49
  Speaker 4: is she's eleven, so I mean she's just turned twelve,
• 35:52
  Speaker 4: so she's getting to that age. Like just last week,
• 35:54
  Speaker 4: she's asking oh, when can I get a phone? When
• 35:56
  Speaker 4: I can get this? And I spoke about it and
• 35:59
  Speaker 4: a podcast earlier. It's like, I feel like it's my
• 36:02
  Speaker 4: full well me and petsus for responsibility as parents to
• 36:06
  Speaker 4: not so much protect them from the internet, but educate
• 36:09
  Speaker 4: them and let them know. Like the Internet, everyone has
• 36:12
  Speaker 4: an opinion. Everyone can say something, and like, I'm not
• 36:15
  Speaker 4: trying to protect you, but I'm trying to like make
• 36:17
  Speaker 4: your skin thick because the platform that we've built and
• 36:22
  Speaker 4: the people that know you and stuff, everyone has something
• 36:24
  Speaker 4: to say, whether it's nice or not, and it's up
• 36:27
  Speaker 4: to you whether you accept that or not. It's up
• 36:29
  Speaker 4: to you whether you let that saying be true or not,
• 36:32
  Speaker 4: which is easier said than none, because we are humans
• 36:34
  Speaker 4: at the end of the day. I don't know there's
• 36:36
  Speaker 4: I always try to raise the positive that we've got
• 36:39
  Speaker 4: from where we're at through social media, but I also
• 36:42
  Speaker 4: put in the like the negatives and the what ifs,
• 36:45
  Speaker 4: and the safety is a big thing as well. But
• 36:48
  Speaker 4: with that being said, like when you weigh out the
• 36:51
  Speaker 4: risk and the rewards that we've been getting. Yeah, it's
• 36:54
  Speaker 4: funny because people I've had comment, especially on Facebook, people
• 36:56
  Speaker 4: that comment on Facebook, they are a whole nother brute away.
• 36:59
  Speaker 4: Like there, their comments are brutal, man, bro, I know, man,
• 37:02
  Speaker 4: there's so mean. They like Instagram and TikTok, you'll get
• 37:05
  Speaker 4: fat shaming and stuff like that. Hey, but Facebook they
• 37:08
  Speaker 4: go into like deep like rudes say, and they say
• 37:10
  Speaker 4: brutal stuff and you're like, oh shit, Karen in that
• 37:15
  Speaker 4: comment exactly. But one of the things I always get
• 37:18
  Speaker 4: is like people are like, oh, stop exploiting your kids.
• 37:21
  Speaker 4: And I had a giggle to my wife because we
• 37:23
  Speaker 4: were in Japan two weeks ago, and I was like,
• 37:25
  Speaker 4: if exploding my kids means my kids get to go
• 37:27
  Speaker 4: to Disneyland, my kids get to do this and do that,
• 37:30
  Speaker 4: then shit, by all means I'm going to exploit them.
• 37:32
  Speaker 4: Like if that's the opportunities they get. And it sounds bad,
• 37:34
  Speaker 4: but I'm like, if that's the opportunities they get, because realistically, man,
• 37:37
  Speaker 4: everything I do, every cent I get from like whatever
• 37:41
  Speaker 4: it is, to social media, whatever it gets pumped back
• 37:43
  Speaker 4: into like the girls and my wife and like all
• 37:45
  Speaker 4: that money just and I'm not complaining anything, but I'm
• 37:48
  Speaker 4: grateful that they get all these opportunities, all these experiences.
• 37:51
  Speaker 4: When I first started doing social media, and I started
• 37:53
  Speaker 4: getting the collapse and stuff. They used to just be
• 37:56
  Speaker 4: me to like, you know, oh, we need to fly
• 37:58
  Speaker 4: to Melbourne to go do this event. But as time's
• 38:00
  Speaker 4: going and like the bigger we're getting and stuff, it's more, oh,
• 38:03
  Speaker 4: we need to fly your family over. And I sit
• 38:05
  Speaker 4: there and I'm like, holy sucks. I never imagined that
• 38:09
  Speaker 4: my wife and the girls would be flying the Japan
• 38:11
  Speaker 4: and getting to experience Japan just because of the funny
• 38:14
  Speaker 4: videos we did. So it's a man definitely a lot
• 38:17
  Speaker 4: of pinch me moments, but it's a crazy space to
• 38:19
  Speaker 4: be in. Yeah, but it's definitely important to educate your
• 38:23
  Speaker 4: kids on the on the pros and cons. Yeah.
• 38:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I think we came from a world where social
• 38:29
  Speaker 2: media it just ramped up so quickly and there was
• 38:32
  Speaker 2: no monitoring my my monitor me at all. It was
• 38:36
  Speaker 2: like this new playground that everyone was just like, oh,
• 38:38
  Speaker 2: I just dropped the kids off and we'll come back.
• 38:41
  Speaker 2: Whereas now like the pendulum swung the other way and
• 38:43
  Speaker 2: wear so much more aware, So it's I think it'll
• 38:47
  Speaker 2: level out.
• 38:47
  Speaker 3: You mentioned something in that that I thought I'll take
• 38:50
  Speaker 3: away from, which is like, educate them because like your
• 38:53
  Speaker 3: first initial instinct is shield them, right, and you think,
• 38:58
  Speaker 3: like I think my kids getting older, Matt, like our
• 39:02
  Speaker 3: kids are the same age. It's sort of getting into
• 39:04
  Speaker 3: that age now where you know it's YouTube kids, YouTube
• 39:07
  Speaker 3: shorts and it's monitored. But you know your first thing
• 39:10
  Speaker 3: to is take it off them. Yeah, but then you
• 39:12
  Speaker 3: mentioned there it's probably like best to educate them. The
• 39:15
  Speaker 3: fact is that someone's always going to have something to say. Well,
• 39:18
  Speaker 3: my thought behind that is you take it off them.
• 39:21
  Speaker 3: It doesn't satisfy that need for them to want to
• 39:23
  Speaker 3: explore it. And if you don't show, if you don't
• 39:25
  Speaker 3: let them explore the healthy way and tastem, they're going
• 39:27
  Speaker 3: to find another way. It's just like pornography, you know,
• 39:30
  Speaker 3: thirteen year old, you can either learn about it with
• 39:32
  Speaker 3: a chat with the parents and awkward, or you can
• 39:34
  Speaker 3: go exploreing your own way and you already know how
• 39:35
  Speaker 3: to explore your Yeah, it's it's the same thing.
• 39:39
  Speaker 2: I'll throw my mom under the bus here, yes, but
• 39:41
  Speaker 2: I remember in high school, like my mum would give
• 39:44
  Speaker 2: me a couple of beers to go out to a
• 39:46
  Speaker 2: party when I was like sixteen and for me alcohol.
• 39:50
  Speaker 5: So what's her name?
• 39:52
  Speaker 2: But for me, it wasn't it wasn't so taboo. My
• 39:55
  Speaker 2: mates who weren't allowed to even look at alcohol.
• 39:58
  Speaker 4: You're the ones that thrashed it when they had the chance.
• 40:00
  Speaker 2: Totally, they would just go over indulge. And so I
• 40:04
  Speaker 2: think it's sometimes better the devil, you know.
• 40:06
  Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, very true.
• 40:07
  Speaker 3: Like there's so many things that sorry Mom, I like,
• 40:12
  Speaker 3: I look back now and I feel like I think
• 40:14
  Speaker 3: about some of the conversations that I have with my mom,
• 40:16
  Speaker 3: the open ones about sex, and I feel like there's
• 40:20
  Speaker 3: trauma there because of that conversation. But at the end
• 40:22
  Speaker 3: of the day, it actually educated, yeah, you know, and
• 40:25
  Speaker 3: I want it to be the same for my kids.
• 40:26
  Speaker 2: And I think the criticism can also come from a
• 40:29
  Speaker 2: place of jealousy as well. I think a lot of
• 40:31
  Speaker 2: people would look at what you're doing and just look at,
• 40:33
  Speaker 2: oh my god, he's going to Japan, Like I want
• 40:35
  Speaker 2: to go to Japan.
• 40:36
  Speaker 5: Throw me on.
• 40:38
  Speaker 2: It's so easy to get their own situation that they're
• 40:40
  Speaker 2: not happy with and take out that frustration.
• 40:42
  Speaker 4: There's a lot of projecting, like oh yeah, even the
• 40:45
  Speaker 4: parenting styles and stuff like that. It's like I get
• 40:47
  Speaker 4: criticized and I'm like, I get it, like maybe you
• 40:50
  Speaker 4: weren't raised that way, or maybe your parents did things
• 40:53
  Speaker 4: differently and you turned out great. But this is me
• 40:56
  Speaker 4: and like mine. So I had a comment the other
• 40:58
  Speaker 4: day on one of my videos because my girls fake nails,
• 41:01
  Speaker 4: and he's like, I'd never give my kids fake nails,
• 41:04
  Speaker 4: and I commented, I was like, thank god, this isn't
• 41:06
  Speaker 4: your kids, Glad and your kids.
• 41:11
  Speaker 5: Yeah, I know, everyone's like with parenting.
• 41:14
  Speaker 3: It is one of those things if you put your
• 41:16
  Speaker 3: parenting style in any capacity, because it's not one size
• 41:22
  Speaker 3: that's but I think like there's a difference between expressing
• 41:26
  Speaker 3: how you would do.
• 41:27
  Speaker 5: Things and and then judging how you're doing it.
• 41:29
  Speaker 3: It's it's such a fine line, right, and especially having
• 41:33
  Speaker 3: millions of followers like you, it escalates. I think every
• 41:36
  Speaker 3: million you have escalator how many more people are going
• 41:39
  Speaker 3: to give you their opinion.
• 41:40
  Speaker 4: And for some reason, the algorithm always I guess because
• 41:43
  Speaker 4: the big following when you go notifications, it doesn't really
• 41:46
  Speaker 4: show much. It just like like like.
• 41:55
  Speaker 3: Flex right there, you know, when you get so many
• 41:57
  Speaker 3: notifications that you can't even read them.
• 42:00
  Speaker 4: So what that's like there's some days where you get
• 42:03
  Speaker 4: a top comment. Yeah, and for some reason the algorithm
• 42:06
  Speaker 4: puts like the shitty comments on the top of feet.
• 42:10
  Speaker 1: Man.
• 42:10
  Speaker 3: Someone said someone was like, oh, you must really hate
• 42:14
  Speaker 3: your wife, and like that one burns me up the most.
• 42:16
  Speaker 5: But I have my response to that is what gave
• 42:18
  Speaker 5: it away. That usually neutralized. But why like why give
• 42:22
  Speaker 5: me that one? Give me the worm? Like, ah, you're funny. Great,
• 42:25
  Speaker 5: that actually makes me.
• 42:28
  Speaker 2: From from my perspective, it is such a joy to
• 42:32
  Speaker 2: watch you and your family on social media, and I
• 42:33
  Speaker 2: think it's so nice. There's a lot of times when
• 42:35
  Speaker 2: people get a lot of success and I don't think
• 42:36
  Speaker 2: they deserve it, and I sounds like I'm being jealous.
• 42:39
  Speaker 2: But then sometimes the right people who really deserve it,
• 42:43
  Speaker 2: like yourself, they get it. And it's been amazing to
• 42:46
  Speaker 2: watch and I can't wait to see what you do next.
• 42:48
  Speaker 4: Yeah, thank you man. It's been crazy weaving and just
• 42:51
  Speaker 4: like any wave, man, I don't know how long it's
• 42:53
  Speaker 4: going to last, So just trying to enjoy every moment
• 42:56
  Speaker 4: and make the most of it. And I'm grateful that
• 42:58
  Speaker 4: my family get to take along. But now I'm in
• 43:00
  Speaker 4: a space where I've realized like the growth and I'm
• 43:02
  Speaker 4: like trying to get my girls down that path and
• 43:05
  Speaker 4: kind of like set them up. Which is funny because
• 43:07
  Speaker 4: two weeks ago we had a collab and they wanted
• 43:10
  Speaker 4: me and my daughter Nini in the collab, and so
• 43:13
  Speaker 4: I drafted out the concept. Everything was approved, and she
• 43:15
  Speaker 4: was like kind of the main star. Yeah, so she
• 43:18
  Speaker 4: was the main style of the video. And we went
• 43:20
  Speaker 4: to the venue and I was like, say these lines.
• 43:23
  Speaker 4: While I recorded said it, she kept like it's like
• 43:26
  Speaker 4: her head wasn't in it. So I had to off
• 43:28
  Speaker 4: the phone and sat down and I was like, what
• 43:29
  Speaker 4: the hell is wrong? And then she started crying and
• 43:32
  Speaker 4: she was like, oh, you're putting so much pressure on
• 43:34
  Speaker 4: me to do this. And I was like, all right,
• 43:37
  Speaker 4: we're gonna have a chat right now. We're here for
• 43:39
  Speaker 4: two hours. We're gonna make this content. Now, let me
• 43:41
  Speaker 4: tell you something. You're getting to an age where you're
• 43:43
  Speaker 4: gonna go and find work. And I can tell you now,
• 43:46
  Speaker 4: no disrespect to anyone that works in McDonald's or works
• 43:49
  Speaker 4: in KFC. This is two hours of pressure. You're gonnaither
• 43:53
  Speaker 4: choose this two hours of pressure, or you can choose
• 43:55
  Speaker 4: eight hours of standing at macas and selling to a customer,
• 43:58
  Speaker 4: dealing with everything that's gonna go on. And I've gone
• 44:00
  Speaker 4: through that, Kia has gone through that, my oldest I've
• 44:03
  Speaker 4: gone through that fast job one hundred percent. And I'm like,
• 44:05
  Speaker 4: the way we're setting things up, there's gonna be pressure everywhere,
• 44:08
  Speaker 4: whether you're making content, whether you're making things. And I'm
• 44:10
  Speaker 4: sorry to say this, and I'm sorry to sound brutal,
• 44:12
  Speaker 4: because my wife was looking at me. She's like, you're
• 44:14
  Speaker 4: being too tough, and I was like, no, Na, this
• 44:15
  Speaker 4: is a life lesson. I was like, I'm sorry to
• 44:17
  Speaker 4: sound brutal, but these two hours of doing this content,
• 44:20
  Speaker 4: this is work. If you want to sit on that
• 44:22
  Speaker 4: plane and go to Japan, if you want to sit
• 44:23
  Speaker 4: on that plane and go to Melbourne, if you want
• 44:25
  Speaker 4: to experience all these beautiful things that we get from
• 44:27
  Speaker 4: the content we make. Sometimes we have to lock down
• 44:29
  Speaker 4: and do the hard things. And this is one of
• 44:30
  Speaker 4: those times. And this is only two hours. And I
• 44:32
  Speaker 4: know it sounds bad, but you're getting to an age where
• 44:35
  Speaker 4: you want to start having to find a job and
• 44:37
  Speaker 4: if you trust me and you and I made it
• 44:40
  Speaker 4: clear to I was like, first of all, told me,
• 44:41
  Speaker 4: do you want to do content creating? Do you want
• 44:43
  Speaker 4: to do what dad does. And because if you don't
• 44:45
  Speaker 4: want to do that, then we don't have to do it. Yeah,
• 44:47
  Speaker 4: then we don't have to do this. But if you
• 44:49
  Speaker 4: want to do it, there is the joys of it,
• 44:51
  Speaker 4: there's the awesome things of it. But people got to
• 44:53
  Speaker 4: put in work. And trust me, I've I've had hard
• 44:56
  Speaker 4: when it comes to work, and doing content is hard,
• 44:59
  Speaker 4: but it my preference. I've hard. Like that's not it's
• 45:02
  Speaker 4: another line, but you know what i mean. Like I've
• 45:05
  Speaker 4: done the laboring, I've done the customer service, I've done
• 45:07
  Speaker 4: all of that. Everything is hard. But when you compare
• 45:10
  Speaker 4: content creating to that, I'd pick that kind of difficulty
• 45:13
  Speaker 4: any kind of anything.
• 45:14
  Speaker 3: Just different pressures, right, I mean, I get what you're
• 45:16
  Speaker 3: saying there. Sometimes you're like I'm feeling a bit too
• 45:19
  Speaker 3: pressure right here. It's like also, I've had a bunch
• 45:21
  Speaker 3: of other jobs. Yeah, exactlytanding.
• 45:24
  Speaker 4: It's just different different yeah, yeah, And it's not like
• 45:26
  Speaker 4: one pressure is better than the other. It's just if
• 45:29
  Speaker 4: you have a blessing like me to choose which kind
• 45:31
  Speaker 4: of pressure you want to choose, then by all means
• 45:33
  Speaker 4: choose it. And so Nini, I'm having a lot of
• 45:35
  Speaker 4: more conversations with her around that, because she's told me,
• 45:38
  Speaker 4: she's like, I want to do content creating. I see
• 45:40
  Speaker 4: what you do in the freedom that you have in
• 45:42
  Speaker 4: terms of making money and stuff, even though a lot
• 45:44
  Speaker 4: of people like that's not a real job. Mate, I'm like,
• 45:46
  Speaker 4: all right, well, it's real money that I'm paying the
• 45:48
  Speaker 4: bills with somewhat. Yeah, exactly exactly. And so I'm having
• 45:54
  Speaker 4: and she's starting to see those benefits of like my work,
• 45:57
  Speaker 4: and so she's like, oh, I want to do that.
• 45:59
  Speaker 4: I want to be able to do this. I want
• 46:00
  Speaker 4: to be able to do that. And I'm like, that's fine.
• 46:02
  Speaker 4: If that's what you want to do, then you've got
• 46:03
  Speaker 4: to understand some of the conversations and some of the
• 46:05
  Speaker 4: situations I'm going to put you in. It's not going
• 46:08
  Speaker 4: to be all like, hey, guys, were we just opened
• 46:10
  Speaker 4: this box and it's all fun in games, like, there's
• 46:12
  Speaker 4: some stuff you got to lock down, and unfortunately that's
• 46:15
  Speaker 4: the way the world spinds, and no one really cares
• 46:16
  Speaker 4: about your feelings. So you just got to hide enough
• 46:18
  Speaker 4: and just keep moving on there.
• 46:19
  Speaker 2: How did she react to that?
• 46:20
  Speaker 4: She took it. Yeah, she takes it very well. My
• 46:22
  Speaker 4: girls no, it's all fun in games, but when especially
• 46:25
  Speaker 4: Nini and Kiara because they're older, the two young ones,
• 46:27
  Speaker 4: every time I try to have a I don't even
• 46:29
  Speaker 4: have a hard conversation with them because it goes in
• 46:31
  Speaker 4: one year and goes out the other. They're still very young.
• 46:34
  Speaker 4: But the other two like when I lock down and
• 46:36
  Speaker 4: tell them, they're like, oh, hopefully they can lead with
• 46:40
  Speaker 4: example now. But yeah, after that conversation, it was pretty
• 46:43
  Speaker 4: good and we've been good since then. And my wife
• 46:46
  Speaker 4: was able to be like, oh, yeah, I see where
• 46:47
  Speaker 4: you're going with this, so the only time will tell
• 46:49
  Speaker 4: I guess yeah, yeah.
• 46:50
  Speaker 3: I think like again, you educated her, protecting her from
• 46:55
  Speaker 3: what potentially can happen, because it's really easy to just
• 46:57
  Speaker 3: be like, oh, look, today's not your day. Yeah, or
• 47:00
  Speaker 3: you're like, hey, look, life's full of pressures. A life's
• 47:02
  Speaker 3: full of these moments where you're like, am I doing
• 47:06
  Speaker 3: the right thing?
• 47:06
  Speaker 5: Am I doing it well enough?
• 47:08
  Speaker 3: All the time, you're always having that conversation in your head,
• 47:11
  Speaker 3: whether it's work or not. So I mean you could
• 47:13
  Speaker 3: have very easily been like, yeah, today's not your day.
• 47:15
  Speaker 5: We'll come back and try another day.
• 47:17
  Speaker 3: But you said, look, you're going to have to face
• 47:19
  Speaker 3: it at some point, and I think earlier on is,
• 47:22
  Speaker 3: especially with this sort of thing, because like for me, yeah,
• 47:25
  Speaker 3: I don't know if I you know, like I can't
• 47:27
  Speaker 3: still can't read a lot of comments, and so I
• 47:29
  Speaker 3: wish like, yeah, if someone of my you know, like
• 47:31
  Speaker 3: you said, you're going to have to just face it
• 47:35
  Speaker 3: and deal with the pressure.
• 47:36
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 47:36
  Speaker 2: One question that we always end on is when the
• 47:39
  Speaker 2: girls are all grown up, they're no longer living at home,
• 47:43
  Speaker 2: what is the one thing you want them to remember
• 47:44
  Speaker 2: about the house they grew up in.
• 47:46
  Speaker 4: That they're always love. It was never perfect, but it
• 47:49
  Speaker 4: was always love, especially if coming from Dad, however he
• 47:53
  Speaker 4: tried to teach you, or however he tried to raise you,
• 47:56
  Speaker 4: whether you agreed with it or not, it always came
• 47:58
  Speaker 4: from a place of love. That's one thing I reflect
• 48:00
  Speaker 4: back to my parents, because I, man, there's been moments
• 48:03
  Speaker 4: throughout my whole life why I was like, damn, I
• 48:05
  Speaker 4: wonder if they loved me. I wonder if they actually
• 48:08
  Speaker 4: could have stayed home with me rather than go to work.
• 48:10
  Speaker 4: I wonder if they raised me the right way. But
• 48:12
  Speaker 4: now that I'm a parent, I've been so less judgmental
• 48:15
  Speaker 4: towards them, and so I just hope my girls can
• 48:17
  Speaker 4: get that reflection as well when they become parents and
• 48:19
  Speaker 4: be like, damn, we shouldn't have judge dad that or
• 48:22
  Speaker 4: mom that way. Because now we got our own kids
• 48:25
  Speaker 4: and their own ship to deal with them. We hope
• 48:27
  Speaker 4: they can be as kind as like we had it.
• 48:29
  Speaker 4: So yeah, I hope when they do get older and
• 48:32
  Speaker 4: they live life that everything that me and my wife
• 48:35
  Speaker 4: did always came from a place of love, whether they
• 48:37
  Speaker 4: agreed with it or not.
• 48:38
  Speaker 2: Love that brother, Thank you so much, Thank you guys
• 48:40
  Speaker 2: for having your absolute pleasure.
• 48:41
  Speaker 3: Yeah, thank you, thank you for spending some time with
• 48:43
  Speaker 3: us today, and I will keep watching.
• 48:46
  Speaker 4: I have no intentions of crying on Valentine's cheers.
• 48:50
  Speaker 2: Man, do you know what annoys me? Ash? What's that
• 48:53
  Speaker 2: annoys me? This is a little grap that I have.
• 48:57
  Speaker 2: If I was going to have four point six million
• 48:58
  Speaker 2: followers and also have a number of awards under my belt,
• 49:02
  Speaker 2: I would be a bit of an arrogant prick, you
• 49:06
  Speaker 2: know that. Look, I'll be honest, and it annoys me
• 49:10
  Speaker 2: that people like Eli have all of that and they're
• 49:12
  Speaker 2: still very humble, still very sweet. Just come on, like
• 49:16
  Speaker 2: have something wrong with you.
• 49:17
  Speaker 3: If you met him and you didn't know what he did,
• 49:18
  Speaker 3: you wouldn't think that he has that many people that
• 49:21
  Speaker 3: follow his every day activities.
• 49:24
  Speaker 2: We did do a cheeky little skit. It would have
• 49:26
  Speaker 2: been rood of us not to, so make sure you
• 49:29
  Speaker 2: jump on our socials give that a like or share,
• 49:32
  Speaker 2: because we need the followers.
• 49:34
  Speaker 3: We got to get a four point six stat If
• 49:36
  Speaker 3: you've enjoyed this episode, please leave review five stars.
• 49:40
  Speaker 4: A couple of common words, you know what.
• 49:41
  Speaker 2: I really enjoy Ash the comments on Spotify.
• 49:45
  Speaker 3: Yes, let's they're negative and I don't like them.
• 49:48
  Speaker 2: Don't get I don't want this to invite people to
• 49:50
  Speaker 2: give negative comments. Don't get many negative comments on Spotify.
• 49:54
  Speaker 2: If you want to have a good passion of the eargo,
• 49:56
  Speaker 2: Trust me, you won't be upset. Go to the individual
• 49:58
  Speaker 2: episodes on Spotify and then read the comments.
• 50:01
  Speaker 3: Will or I'll go to social media Instagram TikTok, Facebook,
• 50:05
  Speaker 3: Facebook group or YouTube. Four point five thousand at the moment,
• 50:08
  Speaker 3: not four point six million.
• 50:13
  Speaker 2: Fuck, it's terrible, isn't it?
• 50:15
  Speaker 5: One day, Matthew?
• 50:16
  Speaker 3: One day, when I grow up, I want to have
• 50:18
  Speaker 3: four point six million followers.
• 50:19
  Speaker 5: He's probably younger than me.
• 50:20
  Speaker 2: Four point six is younger. Oh God, oh, let's get
• 50:24
  Speaker 2: out of here.
• 50:25
  Speaker 1: Bye.
• 50:39
  Speaker 2: Two Doting Dads podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country
• 50:43
  Speaker 2: throughout Australia and the connections to land, see and community.
• 50:47
  Speaker 3: We pay our respects to their elders past and present
• 50:50
  Speaker 3: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torrestraight Island.
• 50:53
  Speaker 5: The people's today. This episode was recorded on Gadigle Land