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What If You Retire and Hate It? Real Questions People Ask Before Retirement · Retire and Thrive

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  Welcome back to another edition of the podcast Retire and
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  Thrive, where we help you build your life with purpose, wealth,
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  and confidence. I'm Cammy alongside Dan.
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  We are so thankful that you're joining us this week, and this
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  week's going to be a lot of fun because we're digging into Dan's
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  career a little bit. You've been doing this for 35
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  plus? Years.
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  In fact, I think next month of the month after might be 36.
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  Oh wow, congratulations. That's fantastic.
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  I don't know if it's congratulations or what's wrong
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  with you. No, no, that's a
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  congratulations. And he has a lot of knowledge
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  from those 35 years. You've worked with a lot of
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  folks and helped a lot of people out and seen a lot of different
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  situations when it comes to finances and retirement at all
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  ages, but specifically retirement age.
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  So on this podcast, I'm always asking Dan interesting
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  questions. Sometimes he's like, where did
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  you think of that? But this week, we're going to
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  talk about some of the clients, anonymously of course, and some
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  questions that you've received over your 35 years in this
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  business. And there's been some
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  interesting ones, some personal ones, I assume.
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  Do you have any that come to mind that were maybe some of the
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  most bizarre, unexpected. One of one of the questions that
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  I was asked, you know, because we're all about the numbers and
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  budgets and spending and income and taxes and so forth.
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  And out of left field, I remember this has probably been
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  5 or 6 years ago, we built out this beautiful plan and their
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  numbers look great. And then we showed it up on the
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  big screen and he said, you know, all these numbers look
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  wonderful, but what if I retire and I don't like retirement.
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  And of course I'm like, I, I don't know what to tell you that
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  I, I can't tell you what retirement is like because I'm
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  still working. But that was a little bit
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  unusual because, you know, and part of that's our fault because
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  I focus so much on the numbers and giving him a pat on the back
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  and saying, you've made it, you're good to go.
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  But his mind was totally different.
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  I mean, he looked at the numbers and he felt like, yeah,
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  everything looks great financially, but what if I
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  actually retire and I don't like it?
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  Then what are we going to do? What did you tell him?
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  Well, I do remember the conversation and we had kind of
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  this bucket list discussion and you hear the phrase all the
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  time, Cammy, you want to retire to something, not from
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  something. And I do think that's very
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  common where people do often times focus on, I just want to
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  get out. I just want to be done.
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  And that's this magical age of 60 or 62 or whatever it is, I
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  want to be completely done. And so as a result of that, five
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  years ago, I do have that hard question that I asked retirees,
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  what does retirement look like for you?
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  And because I don't know if they're going to like it or not
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  like it. And but what I have found, this
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  is no thorough research, there's no exact science.
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  And you will definitely appreciate this, that when
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  people have their wish list in retirement, oftentimes those
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  wish lists turn into more of commitments.
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  And the example why I was going to say you may not like this is
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  I was with a group of retirees. They had newly retired within
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  five years and there was about nine of us in the room.
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  And I just made the statement, I said most people that retire and
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  they put down as one of their top three or four things is they
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  want to play more golf and get their handicap down.
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  I said majority of them, their handicap actually goes up.
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  And for those of you that don't golf, that means their game got
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  worse. And so I made that comment and
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  it was kind of a social setting and I was giving a talk and then
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  it turned into more Q&A and then we took a little break.
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  And this one lady comes up to me and she says, that's me.
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  Why is that? And I said, well, I, I feel like
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  maybe it's more of a commitment and it's not a hobby.
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  I, I don't know the answer, but I'm just saying.
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  So one of the things that we do when, as a result of that guy
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  saying, what if I don't like retirement is we sit down and we
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  ask him, what does retirement look like?
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  And if you're going to give me the I'm going to G3 days a week,
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  I'm going to go fishing two days a week and so on so forth,
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  that's fine. But is that really what you're
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  aspiring to do in retirement? Sure, sure.
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  OK. I have a question that again,
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  people might know the answer to this question.
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  But when you get a second job, like OK, you're in retirement, I
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  don't like retirement, I want to get a job.
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  Do you have to get a part time job?
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  How does that work? Just let me clarify the
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  question. So you're in retirement and you
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  decide I need something else to do with my time.
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  I want to go work part time at this golf course.
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  I'm going to work at the front desk.
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  Do you have to work part time? No, you're working as much as
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  you want to. I mean, there are some rules and
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  I, I think this was kind of a fun episode.
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  So I don't want to go into the path of.
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  But I need to know. You can't earn too much money.
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  Because what if he really didn't like retirement and wanted to go
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  get a a job? Can he do that?
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  I'm going to try to keep money out of the equation because I, I
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  just say this just for Full disclosure.
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  If you're taking Social Security prior to your full retirement,
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  you can only earn so much money before you're penalized.
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  I'm going to stop there because let's keep this fun.
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  Let's keep this lively. Outside of that being penalized
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  if you were to take Social Security, you can work as much
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  or as little as you want to. But there may be a follow up
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  question that you're missing. What?
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  So people that do work part time, what do they do?
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  Is that the question you wanted to ask me?
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  What? What?
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  Again, there's no science here. What I find, and it's very
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  funny, is not everybody that says I'm bored, I maybe retired
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  too early and I want to go back and get a job.
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  I would say more than half the people, at least clients of
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  ours, you know what they end up doing.
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  What? They drive, they drive buses,
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  they drive rental cars back and forth.
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  I don't know why but people that are retired seem to.
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  You get to talk to a lot of people.
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  Maybe it's. I guess it's just yeah, that's
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  interesting. They drive shuttles, you know,
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  like back and forth to the airport or maybe they work, work
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  for. I mean, we have one client of
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  ours, he's got his commercial driving license, drives the big
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  Greyhound buses and just loves it.
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  I have another client of mine, he drives school bus because he
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  just loves it. And the pay isn't that great,
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  but people, but people love to drive when they retire.
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  At least we found that so. Yeah, I mean, driving a school
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  bus with the kids, that's fun. That's fun.
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  Any other strange personal questions that you can think of
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  that you weren't expecting when your client came in?
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  I'm just trying to get that thought in my head or out of my
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  head because that would not be on my bucket list to drive a
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  bunch of elementary school kids on a bus.
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  Kids are cute. They are cute, but I remember
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  when I was in elementary school and I felt so sorry for the
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  school bus. Driver Yeah, kids can be unruly,
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  but they can be cute too. Anything else different or
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  unusual? Yeah, come on.
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  This one's kind of borderline whether I should talk about it
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  as long as I don't use names. I like that.
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  I like that we like borderline. This was just a couple of years
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  ago. We had a meeting and this guy
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  was about ready to retire and we had a meeting set up and I think
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  it was like 11:00 or something. And he called me the morning of
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  the meeting and says can I show up a little early just to run a
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  couple ideas past you? And I said sure.
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  So he shows up at 10:45, we meet in the conference room.
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  We usually have another advisor in the room just to capture
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  notes and so forth. And he said, I wanted to share
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  with you before my wife comes that her and I don't agree on
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  money. So how is this going to work?
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  Oh my God. Yeah, it was.
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  It was challenging. And so you're going to ask me,
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  what did I say? Probably I just my first
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  question was you don't agree like she doesn't know what your
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  money is because we put together this plan includes everything.
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  So I kind of assumed we're all in the same.
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  He's like, no, I'm the saver, she's the spender.
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  And it's not always that way. By the way, just just for clear,
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  just just to be completely honest.
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  In my relationship it's the opposite.
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  Yeah, it can be the opposite, right?
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  But I just said, So what is the main issue?
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  And he just said she thinks that we have unlimited resources and
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  I'm afraid we're going to run out.
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  And so I think for me it was about just asking the clarifying
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  He says we don't agree on money. I didn't know what he was
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  talking about, whether it was how it gets invested or whatever
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  it is. But he's, he was just basically
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  saying it was a spending issue. And I appreciated him coming to
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  me first because then it wasn't me hammering on her saying you
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  can't spend, you can't spend. But it was more about let's be
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  realistic with the spending and the budgets and everything else.
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  And, you know, doesn't make sense really to have a really
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  nice car in retirement and have a $600 a month car payment.
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  I mean, those were kind of the discussions.
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  We had so you were laying it out and showing her, hey, this is
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  where we can spend you have some money here.
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  That was nice of him to let you know, but interesting that he
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  set up a time to come in and chat with you beforehand.
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  And I think when the meeting got done, it wasn't about where she
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  spent money and he didn't want to spend money.
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  It was more about this is the amount that we're comfortable
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  with you guys spending. I don't really care where you
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  spend your money. If you want to, you know, have a
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  $700.00 a month car payment because that's really important
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  to you and you don't want to go out to dinner ever again.
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  I mean, it's not our job to tell people where to spend.
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  It's more about this is what we're comfortable with.
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  Yeah. Absolutely anything else you can
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  think of that makes you laugh that's appropriate to share?
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  Yeah, I'm going to, I'm going to give one last one and then and
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  then we'll move on and. You're pleading the 5th.
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  And it makes me think about, think about the demographics for
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  a minute, Cammy. If somebody's 65 years old and
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  they had kids when they were in their mid 20s, it's likely their
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  kids are like 40 ish, you know, by the time they retire.
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  And one of the conversations we have, or I have pretty bluntly
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  with clients, certainly ones that are maybe a little hesitant
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  to spend money, is I always tell people with this money that
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  you've accumulated, obviously we talked about we don't know what
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  your life expectancy is, but there's only three things you
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  can do with money. You can consume it, you can give
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  it to charity. And by default, once those two
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  have been exhausted, you leave it to your kids.
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  And so we have those frank discussions and so often times I
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  remember one couple, not the story I was planning to go with,
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  but this one couple, we started building out their numbers and
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  they were in their mid 70s and they looked at each other and
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  like, Oh my gosh, are you saying if we live to be 90 years old,
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  we're going to have like $1.6 million?
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  And I'm like, well, that's with the assumptions we've used.
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  And they both looked at each other and they're like, why
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  aren't we spending it? And I'm like, I agree.
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  Why aren't you spending that? Unless you want to leave your
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  two kids, you know, 800 grand. So the question I was going with
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  is this was the wife actually asked me the question and I
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  didn't really know the context, but we had built out the plan.
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  We kind of looked at the numbers and maybe it was the way she
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  phrased it, but she kind of said something to the effect of
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  should we be hiding these numbers from our kids so that
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  they don't expect they're going to inherit a bunch of money?
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  And that was a really loaded question because it's kind of
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  like, wow, I don't know how to really answer that question
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  because I think it's important that your kids are aware of
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  implications, but it really boils down to I don't know your
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  kids either. We had one of our clients that
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  sold this business for 10s of millions of dollars and his kids
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  were in their mid 20s and he brought them to the estate
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  planning attorney. He showed them all the millions
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  and we got done and he looked at me and he's like, would you have
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  done that? And I said probably wouldn't,
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  but that's your deal. I don't know your kids.
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  I mean, if your kids, yeah, it just depends on who the kids
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  are. Right.
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  So I think she wasn't, she phrased it, is it OK to hide
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  money from our kids? But I think she was really
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  saying, does it make sense to share all of our financials with
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  our kids? And you know, I've got 3 kids.
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  My oldest is 30, my next is 28, and then my youngest is 25.
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  And they're all what I would say, fiscally responsible with
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  their money. They're all independent.
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  Unfortunately, they all live in three different states.
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  None of them live in Minnesota. So they're all very independent.
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  But I'm not even comfortable sharing everything with my kids
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  at this age because I don't think it really matters.
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  I mean, if I got hit by a bus tomorrow, you know, they know
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  what to do and who to call and and so forth, which I think that
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  part of it's important. But, you know, values change,
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  you know, accounts go up, they go down, spending changes.
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  See, I would say I'll end on that.
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  It was just, it kind of hit me, you know, kind of sideways.
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  Like I, I don't know what you mean by hiding money from your
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  kids, but but yeah, it was over the years I've seen.
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  Do you think? She did.
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  Do you think she told her kids or do you think they they hit
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  it? I don't know.
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  That was just a couple of years ago and I haven't actually asked
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  that question again and I don't. Know maybe a follow up.
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  I I think hiding it was maybe a little strong.
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  It was probably not divulging is probably.
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  A better place? Absolutely, absolutely.
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  One final question for you, Dan, as we wrap up, what's your
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  favorite part about your job and working with all these folks?
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  Without a doubt, my most favorite part is when we build
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  out a financial plan and people can see everything come
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  together. I mean, think about it.
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  And, and you know, we've got a lot of younger advisors that
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  work at our firm and they, they, I think they probably mock me
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  behind my back because oftentimes we build all these
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  plans and people don't know. They just don't know.
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  And when we start building out and we factor in all kinds of
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  things from inflation to spending to travel to all this
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  stuff, and they can see it and they're like, Oh my gosh, I've
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  made it. And when you hear the words,
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  wow, it's unbelievable. I mean, it's it, I got
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  goosebumps now just thinking about, I mean, these are people
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  that have worked 30-40 years and they've saved and saved and
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  saved and scrimped and saved. And all sudden they get to this
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  point and we run the analysis and work.
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  We tend to air on the conservative side and we give
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  them the green light. It's OK for you to retire next
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  year and they're planning to work another three years.
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  They just shake their head in awe and they leave.
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  And where I was going with these younger advisors is they'll look
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  at me and I'm like, isn't this just a great profession?
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  It's so fun to see people enjoy their hard work and that they've
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  got some clarity on where they're at so.
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  Thank you for asking. Yeah.
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  I mean, they're leaving your space happy.
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  Yeah. It's just fun.
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  Absolutely. Well, that's fun.
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  Thanks for sharing those stories with us.
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  Yeah, that was fun. And thanks for joining us.
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  We hope you have a great week. We'll see you back here next
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  week. Fortress Financial Group, LLC is
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  a registered investment advisor. Advisory services are only
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  offered to clients or prospective clients where
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  Fortress and its representatives are properly licensed or exempt
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  for licensure. The opinions voiced in this
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  material are for general information only and are not
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  intended to provide specific advice or recommendations for
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  any individual. All indexes are unmanaged and
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  may not be invested into directly.
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  Investing involves risk, including loss of principal.