Latest / Juicy Scoop with Heather McDonald / Boz St. John of RHOBH on Bravo, Career, Friendships and Love

Transcript

Boz St. John of RHOBH on Bravo, Career, Friendships and Love · Juicy Scoop with Heather McDonald

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: They think you're done for the day, but they don't
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: know about the drawer. The drawer. Just the one square
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: before bed. Or two, you know. Nobody's watching. You deserve
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: a treat. With eight flavours to choose from, you can
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: choose the flavour you favour with Cadbury Dairy Milk.
• 0:32
  Speaker 2: Heather MacDonald has got the Juicy Scoop.
• 0:38
  Speaker 3: When you're on the road, when you're on the go,
• 0:41
  Speaker 3: Juicy Scoop is the show to know.
• 0:43
  Speaker 2: She talks Hollywood tales for real life, Mr. Saving Serial
• 0:47
  Speaker 2: Data and Serial Sisters. You'll be addicted and addicted fast
• 0:52
  Speaker 2: to the number one tabloid real life podcast.
• 0:55
  Speaker 3: Listen in, listen up.
• 0:57
  Speaker 2: Woo, woo.
• 0:58
  Speaker 3: Heather MacDonald. Juicy Scoop. Hello and welcome to Juicy Scoop.
• 1:03
  Speaker 4: You guys get excited. I have the real housewife, the mother,
• 1:09
  Speaker 4: the fashionista, the, I mean, glamour girl, funny entrepreneur, gives
• 1:18
  Speaker 4: great advice, good friend.
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  Speaker 3: The one and only, Bose St. John.
• 1:24
  Speaker 1: Yay!
• 1:25
  Speaker 3: Welcome to Juicy Scoop.
• 1:26
  Speaker 5: Thank you so much. I'm very glad to be here.
• 1:29
  Speaker 4: I'm so glad you're here. You're wearing a very sexy outfit.
• 1:32
  Speaker 5: You think this is sexy? Yeah.
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  Speaker 3: I think it's great.
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  Speaker 4: I think it's a great, it's a leather strapless jumpsuit.
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  Speaker 5: Yes. And it's, you know, burgundy or X-Blood.
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  Speaker 2: I love it.
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  Speaker 5: I think it's like the color.
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  Speaker 3: I like your hair.
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  Speaker 6: Thank you.
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  Speaker 3: You have a lot of like long glam hair going.
• 1:48
  Speaker 5: Oh girl. That's one thing. I love some hair and
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  Speaker 5: I love a tight outfit. I, I mean, you, I.
• 1:53
  Speaker 4: Don't, I was like, how much do you have to pack?
• 1:56
  Speaker 4: How much, how many suitcases did you.
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  Speaker 5: Have for Italy? So now here's the thing.
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  Speaker 3: Oh, by the way, you guys, this is, she's on
• 2:01
  Speaker 3: Real Housewives Beverly Hills. Among the other things. I don't
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  Speaker 3: even think I said that.
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  Speaker 5: I don't think you said that either. That's fine. We
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  Speaker 5: were just going to get into that.
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  Speaker 3: You have a whole nother life.
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  Speaker 5: Exactly. Too many things to talk about.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah.
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  Speaker 6: So for a majority of my adult life in business
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  Speaker 6: and my career, um, I was running in and out
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  Speaker 6: of airports, meetings, countries, blah, blah. And you can't be
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  Speaker 6: without like some luggage, right? You can't lose luggage. You
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  Speaker 6: can't wait for baggage claim. And so I perfected the
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  Speaker 6: art of only packing carry-ons for a long time. And
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  Speaker 6: that's with like suits and gowns and three different shoes
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  Speaker 6: and hair things and all that stuff.
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  Speaker 3: And how would you do it?
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  Speaker 4: Would you just keep it all in like a black
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  Speaker 4: and white? theme of clothes, so everything goes together?
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  Speaker 5: No, no, actually I wouldn't. I would pack per the occasion.
• 2:49
  Speaker 6: Everybody knows I love color, I love outrageous outfits, and
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  Speaker 6: I did that in my corporate life too, by the way.
• 2:55
  Speaker 6: This is not just a TV thing. Actually, I think
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  Speaker 6: I might have done a video once about how I pack,
• 3:01
  Speaker 6: because people are always curious about that.
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  Speaker 5: What is the secret?
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  Speaker 3: What's the secret?
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  Speaker 5: Okay, well, there's two big secrets.
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  Speaker 4: The biggest thing I hate about travel and doing stand-up
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  Speaker 4: and everything is packing, editing.
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  Speaker 3: And there's something about when I go on.
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  Speaker 4: A trip, it's almost like I like to order for
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  Speaker 4: a table and I get very satisfied when everyone is
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  Speaker 4: satisfied and there's barely any food left over. I love
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  Speaker 4: when I go on a trip and I'm like, oh
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  Speaker 4: my God, I wore everything but two things. There's something
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  Speaker 4: about like, but after all these years, I still suck
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  Speaker 4: at it.
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  Speaker 6: Well, I think there's one big secret which will make
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  Speaker 6: people nervous, which is that you can only pack for
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  Speaker 6: each occasion.
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  Speaker 5: Like there's no extras, actually.
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  Speaker 6: And that makes people nervous because like, oh, what if
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  Speaker 6: a strap breaks or like.
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  Speaker 3: What changed my mind? No, you've got to decide.
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  Speaker 5: No, you decide.
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  Speaker 6: You pack the one thing for the one event and
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  Speaker 6: then the one thing for the one dinner. And, you know,
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  Speaker 6: like you just pack enough for the time you're going
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  Speaker 6: to be gone. No extras, no backups, no ifs. Oh,
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  Speaker 6: what if I feel differently when I get there?
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  Speaker 5: I don't do that. Yeah, I pack.
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  Speaker 6: And so now I do that. So for Italy, I
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  Speaker 6: packed for everything that I knew we were going to do.
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  Speaker 7: Yeah.
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  Speaker 8: No extras.
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  Speaker 5: No extras.
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  Speaker 4: I also feel like I've not done that much European
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  Speaker 4: travel when we went away a couple years ago. And
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  Speaker 4: I was like, why did I bring so much stuff?
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  Speaker 4: I could have bought those cheap little yellow dresses, which
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  Speaker 4: would have been totally cute for a night out. I
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  Speaker 4: was doing that feeling like, oh, I need this many
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  Speaker 4: dresses for this many nights out.
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  Speaker 3: I could have definitely packed less and just bought a
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  Speaker 3: few things.
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  Speaker 6: By the way, it's like, I mean, and also, look,
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  Speaker 6: I'm a very calendared person also. So it's like, I know,
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  Speaker 6: it's like, okay, look, we're going to go to dinner
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  Speaker 6: at this restaurant. It's outside, it's rooftop, it's inside, it
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  Speaker 6: might be cold. Whatever the thing is, I've already understood
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  Speaker 6: what's going to happen. So I'm going to pack for
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  Speaker 6: that thing.
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  Speaker 4: So you don't use a stylist or you do?
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  Speaker 5: I do sometimes, but most of the time I style myself.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah.
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  Speaker 4: Yeah.
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  Speaker 3: And so, okay, let's start a little bit.
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  Speaker 4: With your background, what was your childhood briefly like and
• 5:04
  Speaker 4: then going to university?
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  Speaker 6: Where was that all? Okay, so my parents were originally
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  Speaker 6: from Ghana in West Africa. My dad came to the U.S.
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  Speaker 6: on a Fulbright scholarship, like really one in 100 million
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  Speaker 6: chances because he didn't go to middle school or high school,
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  Speaker 6: didn't go to regular college, and he joined the Navy
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  Speaker 6: when he was 18.
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  Speaker 5: He was orphaned quite young.
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  Speaker 3: The Navy in America.
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  Speaker 5: The Navy in Ghana.
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  Speaker 4: Oh.
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  Speaker 5: Yes. But he's a savant, a musical savant.
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  Speaker 6: And so he got into the naval band and was
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  Speaker 6: playing the clarinet, which he taught himself.
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  Speaker 5: Amazing.
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  Speaker 6: And he was playing for an American delegation. And one
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  Speaker 6: of the diplomats was like, wow, you're so talented. He
• 5:46
  Speaker 6: was first chair. And he's like, you're so talented. Like,
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  Speaker 6: you know, where did you learn to play? And my
• 5:50
  Speaker 6: dad was kind of like, yeah. Nowhere. And he was like, oh,
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  Speaker 6: you should come to America and like study music. And
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  Speaker 6: my dad was like, what do you even mean? And
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  Speaker 6: so he told him to apply for the Fulbright, which
• 6:03
  Speaker 6: is a very difficult scholarship to get.
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  Speaker 5: And so my dad applied and came to the U.S.
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  Speaker 5: and earned two PhDs.
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  Speaker 3: And when he came, was he single?
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  Speaker 5: He was single when he came.
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  Speaker 6: And then, but he, you know, through friends and family
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  Speaker 6: and he was.
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  Speaker 5: Hooked up with my mother. Okay. And so they decided
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  Speaker 5: to get married and she moved to the U.S. with him.
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  Speaker 6: But my dad is a Pan-Africanist. Like he really loves
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  Speaker 6: the continent. And so when he was here for school,
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  Speaker 6: he knew he wanted to go back. A lot of
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  Speaker 6: times what happens to immigrants is they come to the U.S.,
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  Speaker 6: the U.K., Canada, wherever, and they stay. You know, they're
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  Speaker 6: just like, OK, I've made it. So I'm staying here.
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  Speaker 6: My dad was like, no, I don't think so. I
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  Speaker 6: was born six months before he graduated with a second Ph.D. Oh,
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  Speaker 6: and we went right back to Ghana.
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  Speaker 3: Oh, you did.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah.
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  Speaker 5: And so my dad.
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  Speaker 6: So even though I was born in the U.S., I
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  Speaker 6: do consider myself bicultural because a lot of my formative
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  Speaker 6: years were spent on the continent of Africa.
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  Speaker 5: And then we finally moved to Colorado Springs, Colorado, when
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  Speaker 5: I was 12.
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  Speaker 3: So from six months to 12, you were.
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  Speaker 6: Yeah, we moved around. We were in Nairobi, Kenya for
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  Speaker 6: a while.
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  Speaker 3: So you speak other languages?
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  Speaker 6: Yes, yes, of course, yeah. My parents are multilingual. I
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  Speaker 6: speak two.
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  Speaker 3: Okay.
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  Speaker 5: Well, three, technically.
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  Speaker 3: What are the three?
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  Speaker 5: They're Ghanaian languages, Chi and Fanti.
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  Speaker 1: Oh, wow.
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  Speaker 4: Yeah.
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  Speaker 5: And my mother only, she does not speak to me
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  Speaker 5: in English.
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  Speaker 4: Oh, really?
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  Speaker 7: Yeah.
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  Speaker 6: Which is hilarious because when I was 12, I mean,
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  Speaker 6: they also, by the way, have always been like African African.
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  Speaker 6: So even in Colorado Springs, like my little white girlfriends
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  Speaker 6: would come over there and my mom would be like,
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  Speaker 6: she'd just speak to them as if they were her children.
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  Speaker 6: She would not speak to them in English and expect
• 7:45
  Speaker 6: them to respond to her. And she would feed them
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  Speaker 6: hot pepper soup and like all kinds of, you know,
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  Speaker 6: Ghanaian dishes. One of my friends, one of my best
• 7:54
  Speaker 6: friends who actually made an appearance on The Real Housewives,
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  Speaker 6: her name is Summer. Summer and I became like instant
• 8:02
  Speaker 6: friends when we were like 14. And Summer is exactly
• 8:06
  Speaker 6: what her name sounds like. You know, she's blonde, she's
• 8:08
  Speaker 6: got green eyes, she's tall, she's pretty. We're both on
• 8:11
  Speaker 6: cheerleading together.
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  Speaker 5: You know, she's a swimmer. Like, summer is summer.
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  Speaker 6: And her favorite dish is still one of my mother's
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  Speaker 6: Ghanaian dishes. And when she comes to.
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  Speaker 5: Visit, she still asks.
• 8:21
  Speaker 3: I mean, hot pepper soup does sound good to me.
• 8:22
  Speaker 5: Oh my God, it's delicious.
• 8:23
  Speaker 3: I like stuff like that. It's delicious. And so, were
• 8:27
  Speaker 3: you guys religious? Did you belong to any church?
• 8:30
  Speaker 6: Well, my parents, this is such a complicated story, but
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  Speaker 6: my parents believed in Native Christianity. religions for most of
• 8:37
  Speaker 6: their adult lives. But in the early 80s, there was
• 8:42
  Speaker 6: a coup of the political government in Ghana. My dad
• 8:45
  Speaker 6: was serving in the government at the time. He was
• 8:47
  Speaker 6: a minister. And the government that took over, or the
• 8:52
  Speaker 6: people who were through the government, put all of the
• 8:55
  Speaker 6: ministers in jail, in prison.
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  Speaker 5: Political detention.
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  Speaker 3: Oh, my God.
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  Speaker 6: In fact, this was like the blip when we came
• 9:01
  Speaker 6: to the U.S. before we moved formally, was that my
• 9:04
  Speaker 6: mom left the country with me, my two younger sisters,
• 9:08
  Speaker 6: and she was pregnant with my last sister. And we
• 9:11
  Speaker 6: came to Washington, D.C. on political asylum.
• 9:13
  Speaker 5: Oh, wow.
• 9:13
  Speaker 6: And so in prison, this is my dad's famous story.
• 9:17
  Speaker 6: He says he prayed to God. He was like, look,
• 9:20
  Speaker 6: if you get me out of this prison, because they
• 9:22
  Speaker 6: were killing everybody. They're like, if you get me out
• 9:24
  Speaker 6: of this prison and I can reunite with my family,
• 9:27
  Speaker 6: I will become a Christian.
• 9:30
  Speaker 3: Wow.
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  Speaker 6: Somehow he was released. He came to the U.S. We
• 9:35
  Speaker 6: all reunited in D.C. And he was like, we are
• 9:37
  Speaker 6: now Christians.
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  Speaker 3: That's amazing.
• 9:40
  Speaker 5: And that's how I became a Christian.
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  Speaker 3: Oh, I love that.
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  Speaker 4: That's so interesting. I did not understand all of that backstory.
• 9:47
  Speaker 4: So I'm glad you shared it.
• 9:49
  Speaker 5: Actually, I don't think I've ever shared that before anywhere.
• 9:52
  Speaker 3: Oh, well, good. I'm glad.
• 9:53
  Speaker 4: My audience will love that honestly because it's like that's
• 9:58
  Speaker 4: so beautiful and interesting and and you know when you're
• 10:03
  Speaker 4: not an immigrant like i'm not an immigrant but i
• 10:05
  Speaker 4: have such great respect my husband's um dad came from
• 10:10
  Speaker 4: like escaped czechoslovakia like world war ii and all that
• 10:15
  Speaker 4: and their stories just are like yeah And the first
• 10:17
  Speaker 4: time I went to his Thanksgiving and they all did
• 10:21
  Speaker 4: this circle thing as, and thinking.
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  Speaker 3: Being American.
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  Speaker 2: Right.
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  Speaker 3: And I was kind of like, oh my God, we
• 10:28
  Speaker 3: just used to watch like.
• 10:29
  Speaker 5: Like football.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, we watched football and like Twilight Zone.
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  Speaker 7: And complaining.
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  Speaker 3: And eat. I'm like. Oh my God.
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  Speaker 5: So then after that, they were.
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  Speaker 3: Like the teenagers that were like, well, they're like, we're
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  Speaker 3: done doing the circle. And I was like, the circle.
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  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 10:44
  Speaker 3: So it's like, it's really beautiful.
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  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 10:46
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 10:46
  Speaker 5: I think about that a lot.
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  Speaker 4: So I want to know, so here you are, this corporate, um, woman,
• 10:51
  Speaker 4: you've done all these amazing things.
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  Speaker 3: Um, When you were married to your husband.
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  Speaker 6: Yes.
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  Speaker 3: Now, he has passed.
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  Speaker 5: Yes.
• 11:00
  Speaker 3: But were you guys together when he passed?
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  Speaker 6: No.
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  Speaker 5: We were separated when he passed.
• 11:05
  Speaker 6: Oh. So what happened is that we got married in 2003.
• 11:10
  Speaker 6: And he wanted a family right away. I really didn't.
• 11:16
  Speaker 6: I was on the corporate track and I was a
• 11:18
  Speaker 6: hot shot. And I was like, absolutely not. This is
• 11:21
  Speaker 6: going to slow me down. And so we agreed that
• 11:23
  Speaker 6: we wait five years into our marriage to try and
• 11:25
  Speaker 6: have a family. Well, five years comes and I'm like,
• 11:27
  Speaker 6: how about another six years? And he's like, absolutely not.
• 11:32
  Speaker 6: So I got pregnant. And unfortunately, I got very ill
• 11:37
  Speaker 6: during my pregnancy, developed severe preeclampsia, and my daughter passed
• 11:42
  Speaker 6: away on the day she was born. Um, it was, see,
• 11:48
  Speaker 6: it's still hard for me to articulate. Um, but it
• 11:51
  Speaker 6: was maybe one of the most devastating things I've ever experienced.
• 11:55
  Speaker 4: I honestly can't imagine when that's, when I've heard people
• 11:58
  Speaker 4: say that because, you know, you go through the entire thing.
• 12:02
  Speaker 5: Oh my God, the anticipation.
• 12:04
  Speaker 3: And what, and then what do people say?
• 12:06
  Speaker 5: And I mean, just the.
• 12:07
  Speaker 6: Whole thing of it is just so sorry. It's so,
• 12:10
  Speaker 6: so terrible. Um, And I feel like that might have
• 12:15
  Speaker 6: been the first fracture, you know, in our relationship was
• 12:20
  Speaker 6: Eve's death. Because while he didn't blame me, I felt
• 12:26
  Speaker 6: like he blamed me.
• 12:28
  Speaker 5: And I think that was... I think I made that up.
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  Speaker 3: Well, I mean, the passing of a child... You feel
• 12:36
  Speaker 3: all kind of guilt. That is like.
• 12:37
  Speaker 4: One of the biggest things. Very few marriages can survive that.
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  Speaker 5: That is exactly right.
• 12:41
  Speaker 3: Whether it's an accident or the child is ill or something.
• 12:45
  Speaker 5: I now understand that. Yeah. But at the time, all
• 12:48
  Speaker 5: you have is your grief.
• 12:49
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 12:49
  Speaker 5: You know?
• 12:50
  Speaker 6: And I also was in a, I think as a
• 12:54
  Speaker 6: part of my grief, I was so desperate to become
• 12:57
  Speaker 6: a mother.
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  Speaker 5: After having argued for years that I didn't want.
• 13:00
  Speaker 4: To have a kid.
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  Speaker 3: Because now you had experienced motherhood.
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  Speaker 6: Because now I had experienced motherhood. And I was like, no, no, no, no, no. Like,
• 13:05
  Speaker 6: I must do it. And so I got pregnant three
• 13:09
  Speaker 6: months after Eve had died. And I was miserable the
• 13:13
  Speaker 6: entire pregnancy. One, because I got sick again and I
• 13:16
  Speaker 6: was terrified. Two, because I had blamed myself and blamed
• 13:20
  Speaker 6: my body for betraying me. And so I wanted to
• 13:24
  Speaker 6: do everything right. Then I went on bed rest at
• 13:27
  Speaker 6: six months pregnant. Like couldn't go to work, you know,
• 13:30
  Speaker 6: feet up, like actual bed rest.
• 13:32
  Speaker 3: I had a friend that had to do that with
• 13:33
  Speaker 3: her twins.
• 13:34
  Speaker 4: Yeah. And she said that she did things like what
• 13:37
  Speaker 4: they say that you should do if you're like a
• 13:39
  Speaker 4: prisoner of war.
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  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 13:40
  Speaker 4: Like you're supposed to have like a scheduled thing. Like
• 13:42
  Speaker 4: I'm going to, I'm going to do this for two hours,
• 13:44
  Speaker 4: read a book for two hours. Then I watch one
• 13:47
  Speaker 4: TV show. Then I talk to someone on the phone
• 13:49
  Speaker 4: from three to four because it is so hard, especially,
• 13:53
  Speaker 4: and she was a corporate woman too.
• 13:54
  Speaker 3: So it's like, Really hard for like, yeah.
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  Speaker 6: On top of it, like, I actually like that analogy
• 13:59
  Speaker 6: a lot. I had not thought of that. But it's like,
• 14:02
  Speaker 6: you know, the combined like boredom and fear and just
• 14:09
  Speaker 6: irritation and then your body feels gross. Like everything was awful.
• 14:15
  Speaker 6: And so I was not a very happy pregnant person.
• 14:18
  Speaker 6: And Peter was also extra vigilant, is what I would
• 14:24
  Speaker 6: call it.
• 14:25
  Speaker 5: You know what I mean? Like, don't eat that.
• 14:28
  Speaker 6: Don't you think you should sleep a little bit more?
• 14:30
  Speaker 5: Like, no. You know, maybe we should stand up. No, no,
• 14:34
  Speaker 5: the doctor said I shouldn't stand up. No, stand up
• 14:36
  Speaker 5: for a minute. You've just been sitting all day. You know,
• 14:38
  Speaker 5: so we were doing that.
• 14:40
  Speaker 6: And so on top of the grief of losing Eve,
• 14:42
  Speaker 6: now we're in this like high stress pregnancy together. Then
• 14:46
  Speaker 6: Lael is born and she's a preemie. And so she's
• 14:50
  Speaker 6: in the NICU for like six weeks now.
• 14:55
  Speaker 5: OK. And we're both insane.
• 14:57
  Speaker 6: I am sitting at the like by her bedside or
• 15:01
  Speaker 6: by her incubator from the time I give birth on
• 15:04
  Speaker 6: this hard ass wooden chair, by the way.
• 15:06
  Speaker 5: Oh, Peter has to go back to work. And what
• 15:09
  Speaker 5: did he do?
• 15:10
  Speaker 6: He was in advertising also. So he has to go
• 15:13
  Speaker 6: back to work. And so I'm sitting there for 12
• 15:15
  Speaker 6: hours a day.
• 15:15
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 15:16
  Speaker 6: He comes for two hours. You know, did she come
• 15:20
  Speaker 6: out of the incubator today? How much did she eat?
• 15:22
  Speaker 5: You know, we were just.
• 15:25
  Speaker 6: So a year after she was born, we separated. And
• 15:28
  Speaker 6: I was like, I can't do this. I don't want
• 15:30
  Speaker 6: to be in this relationship anymore. But I didn't have
• 15:34
  Speaker 6: the courage to say I wanted a divorce. I wanted
• 15:37
  Speaker 6: him to come to the realization.
• 15:39
  Speaker 3: But he did move out.
• 15:40
  Speaker 5: He did move out. And then....
• 15:44
  Speaker 6: I was trying to get him to say like, I
• 15:47
  Speaker 6: wanted him to initiate the divorce.
• 15:49
  Speaker 5: So I'm like, okay, I'm going to be in a relationship.
• 15:52
  Speaker 3: Okay?
• 15:52
  Speaker 5: I'm going to get a boyfriend. I think you should
• 15:54
  Speaker 5: get a girlfriend. And he's like, no, absolutely not. I'm like, no.
• 15:58
  Speaker 5: But that's what we should do because let's test it out.
• 16:00
  Speaker 5: Let's see.
• 16:00
  Speaker 6: If we like other people, then we know we shouldn't
• 16:02
  Speaker 6: be together. If maybe we don't like other people, then
• 16:04
  Speaker 6: we get back together.
• 16:05
  Speaker 5: He says, no, no, no.
• 16:06
  Speaker 6: Until I go over there one day to his apartment
• 16:08
  Speaker 6: to drop off layout and I see an ugly ass
• 16:10
  Speaker 6: pair of shoes that belong to a woman.
• 16:13
  Speaker 5: I'm like, who the hell's shoes are these? And I
• 16:15
  Speaker 5: was pissed.
• 16:16
  Speaker 3: But did you have your boyfriend or no?
• 16:18
  Speaker 5: Oh, I sure did.
• 16:19
  Speaker 3: Okay, good.
• 16:19
  Speaker 5: It was a total double standard.
• 16:20
  Speaker 2: Okay, good.
• 16:21
  Speaker 5: I had my boyfriend.
• 16:22
  Speaker 8: Okay.
• 16:22
  Speaker 5: And he knew about him. Okay.
• 16:24
  Speaker 6: And then I go over there and I'm like, wait,
• 16:25
  Speaker 6: so you have a girlfriend or like, what the hell's
• 16:27
  Speaker 6: going on? Well, Peter gets sick probably about four months
• 16:32
  Speaker 6: after the discovery of this girlfriend. And by the way,
• 16:35
  Speaker 6: I was trying to work on my own emotions around
• 16:37
  Speaker 6: this thing. Um, And I was actually pretty happy to
• 16:42
  Speaker 6: be like a sister wife.
• 16:44
  Speaker 5: You know, she and I were getting along. She was
• 16:47
  Speaker 5: good with your daughter? She was great with my daughter.
• 16:49
  Speaker 5: She would, you know, take him to the doctor.
• 16:52
  Speaker 3: And what was his illness?
• 16:53
  Speaker 6: He had Burkitt's lymphoma, a cancer. And at first we
• 16:57
  Speaker 6: thought treatable. You know, it's not, you can't operate on it,
• 17:01
  Speaker 6: but radiation and chemo maybe could get rid of it. Uh,
• 17:05
  Speaker 6: and we went on like that for probably three months
• 17:10
  Speaker 6: or four months, um, where we were sharing, we were
• 17:13
  Speaker 6: on a group text together, you know, the whole thing.
• 17:15
  Speaker 6: And then came his terminal diagnosis. And that's when I
• 17:19
  Speaker 6: was like, oh no, no, she got to go. And,
• 17:23
  Speaker 6: and we can't, I can't do this. Like I, I'm
• 17:26
  Speaker 6: going to be here. If we're going to face death,
• 17:29
  Speaker 6: we're going to do it together and nobody else is
• 17:31
  Speaker 6: going to be here but us. And he was very
• 17:34
  Speaker 6: happy with that because he'd been trying to get us
• 17:36
  Speaker 6: back together anyway.
• 17:38
  Speaker 8: Planning on rewarding your staff this year struggling to choose
• 17:41
  Speaker 8: between a shop gift card or a pay anywhere card
• 17:44
  Speaker 8: stop choosing with options card your employees get both they
• 17:48
  Speaker 8: can spend with Ireland's favourite retailers or choose a card
• 17:51
  Speaker 8: you can tap and pay with all in one reward
• 17:54
  Speaker 8: you choose who to reward and how much options card
• 17:57
  Speaker 8: handles the rest it's valid for five years with no
• 18:00
  Speaker 8: fees chipping away at the balance make your rewards more
• 18:04
  Speaker 8: rewarding visit optionscard.ie today.
• 18:08
  Speaker 7: I'm Darman, and this is What Happens Next. Each week
• 18:11
  Speaker 7: on the show, I sit down with extraordinary people who
• 18:14
  Speaker 7: have faced tremendous setbacks and yet somehow have found a
• 18:19
  Speaker 7: way to turn them into their greatest strengths.
• 18:21
  Speaker 6: Life is one long lesson of chaos.
• 18:24
  Speaker 4: I'm heading to the Emmys, and I have police complaints
• 18:27
  Speaker 4: filed against me.
• 18:28
  Speaker 1: When your free will was about to be taken from you,
• 18:30
  Speaker 1: what would you do if it was given back?
• 18:32
  Speaker 7: Where did that need come from where you thought that
• 18:35
  Speaker 7: you had to succeed in order to feel loved?
• 18:38
  Speaker 5: He said, I have a work dad. I need a
• 18:39
  Speaker 5: home dad. What happens next? When I came in, he
• 18:42
  Speaker 5: started crying.
• 18:43
  Speaker 7: Everybody in life encounters hardships. What defines them is not
• 18:47
  Speaker 7: those hard moments that they go through. It's about what
• 18:50
  Speaker 7: happens next.
• 18:51
  Speaker 3: I decided to risk it all. I realized how valuable
• 18:54
  Speaker 3: every day was. You're worth the work.
• 18:55
  Speaker 5: Listen, Dara, I'm not going to pull punches.
• 18:57
  Speaker 3: You can use your voice even if it's shaped.
• 19:00
  Speaker 7: The stories are different, but the impact is the same.
• 19:03
  Speaker 7: Only one question matters. What happens next?
• 19:14
  Speaker 5: Now, in hindsight, I was for sure too harsh on her.
• 19:20
  Speaker 3: Have you ever kept in touch with her after his passing?
• 19:24
  Speaker 5: No, no. She came to his funeral.
• 19:27
  Speaker 6: But I think I was in too dark of a
• 19:29
  Speaker 6: place to recognize at that time that I'd been too
• 19:32
  Speaker 6: harsh with her.
• 19:33
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 19:34
  Speaker 3: And was she like your age? Was she your type? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like,
• 19:37
  Speaker 3: did he have a type or was she totally different
• 19:39
  Speaker 3: from you?
• 19:39
  Speaker 5: She was totally different. This girl was like, you know.
• 19:43
  Speaker 6: freaking a yoga instructor or some shit, you know, like
• 19:46
  Speaker 6: crunchy and all the things. Like I've been a glam
• 19:49
  Speaker 6: girl my whole life. yeah she was very different from
• 19:52
  Speaker 6: me but I liked her well enough you know like
• 19:54
  Speaker 6: I thought she was a reasonably wonderful person and she
• 19:57
  Speaker 6: took good care of him but I think my compounding
• 20:02
  Speaker 6: grief the unfairness of it like everything was just too
• 20:07
  Speaker 6: much and I needed space And I wanted to reconcile
• 20:12
  Speaker 6: our family.
• 20:13
  Speaker 5: I felt guilty. There was just a lot going on.
• 20:16
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 20:16
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 20:17
  Speaker 3: So he passed what year?
• 20:19
  Speaker 5: In 2013.
• 20:20
  Speaker 3: So then you're now the single, you're a widow, you're
• 20:24
  Speaker 3: a single mom, you're doing all your things.
• 20:25
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 20:26
  Speaker 4: And you're always, you're still working full-time corporate executive at
• 20:30
  Speaker 4: these jobs. What was your relationship with reality TV?
• 20:34
  Speaker 5: Did you watch it?
• 20:35
  Speaker 3: Were you a fan?
• 20:37
  Speaker 5: Oh, I love TV.
• 20:38
  Speaker 6: I have always loved TV. I think part of it
• 20:40
  Speaker 6: came from when I was 12 and we moved to
• 20:42
  Speaker 6: the U.S. You know, because part of the, what I
• 20:45
  Speaker 6: call the education of it.
• 20:46
  Speaker 3: Was I had to learn pop culture. Oh my God,
• 20:48
  Speaker 3: that's all you got to do.
• 20:49
  Speaker 5: Watch some TV.
• 20:50
  Speaker 3: You know what I mean?
• 20:51
  Speaker 6: Watch MTV. You watch the sitcoms, music videos. Like you'll
• 20:56
  Speaker 6: learn about fashion. You'll learn about culture. You'll learn about athletes.
• 21:00
  Speaker 6: Watch the games. Girl, I was stuck to my TV.
• 21:04
  Speaker 6: So I had, oh, I knew everything. I know everything
• 21:06
  Speaker 6: about everything. TV show, reality show.
• 21:08
  Speaker 4: So you had watched Real Housewives of Beverly Hills?
• 21:10
  Speaker 5: Oh, for sure, yeah.
• 21:12
  Speaker 4: So then how did the casting come about then?
• 21:17
  Speaker 6: Oh, well, that was a very weird story because apparently
• 21:20
  Speaker 6: they had been trying to get to me for a
• 21:22
  Speaker 6: number of years, but I was a top executive at
• 21:26
  Speaker 6: big companies. There was no way I would have had
• 21:27
  Speaker 6: time to do the show.
• 21:29
  Speaker 3: Had they reached out and you said no or someone
• 21:31
  Speaker 3: said there's no way?
• 21:32
  Speaker 6: Somebody on my behalf said no. And I don't know
• 21:35
  Speaker 6: who that was or how that was.
• 21:36
  Speaker 4: I don't know.
• 21:36
  Speaker 3: How do you feel about that? I actually feel okay.
• 21:40
  Speaker 5: When you're at that level, you get protected from a
• 21:42
  Speaker 5: lot because it's too overwhelming.
• 21:43
  Speaker 4: Yeah, but I wonder if the person was almost like,
• 21:46
  Speaker 4: who the person was, you might know who they are
• 21:48
  Speaker 4: or not, but it was like, well.
• 21:49
  Speaker 5: Yeah, because we don't want to lose you. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 21:52
  Speaker 3: So we don't want to lose you, but then.
• 21:53
  Speaker 5: Yeah, but the thing is that, like, I couldn't have
• 21:56
  Speaker 5: done it. I mean, they.
• 21:58
  Speaker 6: I don't think they said no not knowing what I
• 22:00
  Speaker 6: would have said, you know? And it was the right call,
• 22:02
  Speaker 6: because I would have said no.
• 22:04
  Speaker 3: At that time.
• 22:04
  Speaker 5: Okay, that they said no then.
• 22:07
  Speaker 6: But the time when I got the email about this opportunity,
• 22:10
  Speaker 6: I had already retired, you know, from my corporate life.
• 22:14
  Speaker 5: Like, Physically, mentally, emotionally, all of it.
• 22:16
  Speaker 6: I'd retired, I'd published my book, I was trying to
• 22:19
  Speaker 6: figure out what to do next. Wasn't sure if I
• 22:22
  Speaker 6: wanted to go back to corporate, because then my ego
• 22:24
  Speaker 6: started to play tricks on me. Like, now I'm without
• 22:27
  Speaker 6: a title and I'm just sitting here. What do I
• 22:29
  Speaker 6: do with the rest of my life?
• 22:31
  Speaker 3: And financially, were you very comfortable?
• 22:34
  Speaker 5: Oh, yeah. I'd done very well in all the companies.
• 22:37
  Speaker 4: You were like, I can chill for a while or
• 22:39
  Speaker 4: start something totally new.
• 22:40
  Speaker 6: But I'm not the kind to just sit around. So
• 22:43
  Speaker 6: I was like, you know what? I think I'm going
• 22:44
  Speaker 6: to start my own business. I've always loved hair. I
• 22:48
  Speaker 6: was like, oh, let me go to China. I'll go
• 22:50
  Speaker 6: to the biggest hair show in the world. I went
• 22:51
  Speaker 6: by myself. I did all the research. I built a
• 22:54
  Speaker 6: factory in Ghana. I was doing all kinds of things
• 22:57
  Speaker 6: and starting my business.
• 22:58
  Speaker 5: And then I get an email.
• 23:00
  Speaker 6: You know, that's just like, hey, we would like to
• 23:01
  Speaker 6: talk to you. And Heather, I swear, my hand to God,
• 23:04
  Speaker 6: I thought they wanted me to be the CMO. I
• 23:06
  Speaker 6: thought they wanted me to be the CMO of like
• 23:08
  Speaker 6: Bravo or something. So I went to the meeting thinking
• 23:10
  Speaker 6: that's what we're going to talk about.
• 23:11
  Speaker 3: Really? That's so funny.
• 23:12
  Speaker 6: Because it wasn't, the email wasn't, now that I look
• 23:15
  Speaker 6: back at it, the email wasn't clear, but I think
• 23:17
  Speaker 6: they thought they were being clear. Right. But it wasn't
• 23:19
  Speaker 6: clear to me because why would I think anybody would
• 23:21
  Speaker 6: want me to be a housewife?
• 23:22
  Speaker 5: You know what I mean?
• 23:23
  Speaker 6: And so I went like, oh, okay, great. So what's,
• 23:26
  Speaker 6: you know, what's happening? What are the plans? What's the objective?
• 23:30
  Speaker 6: You know, the strategy of the network? And they're answering
• 23:33
  Speaker 6: the questions.
• 23:34
  Speaker 3: But they're like, what the fuck is happening?
• 23:35
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 23:36
  Speaker 5: Like, you know, they're kind of like, ooh. Now I
• 23:39
  Speaker 5: can see through their eyes that they must have thought,
• 23:40
  Speaker 5: this is a weirdo.
• 23:42
  Speaker 3: So then what did you realize?
• 23:44
  Speaker 6: I realized when they said they wanted to come film
• 23:47
  Speaker 6: me at my house with my family.
• 23:48
  Speaker 3: And then did you reveal?
• 23:49
  Speaker 6: Yeah, then I was just like, oh, that's interesting.
• 23:52
  Speaker 5: Because here's the thing. There have been other jobs.
• 23:55
  Speaker 6: Like, for instance, my job at Pepsi, you would have
• 23:58
  Speaker 6: to go on route rides with the truck drivers, right?
• 24:02
  Speaker 6: And go and see how the product is taken off
• 24:04
  Speaker 6: the truck and put into.
• 24:06
  Speaker 5: A Walmart or whatever, right? You know what I mean?
• 24:08
  Speaker 5: Or when I was at.
• 24:09
  Speaker 6: Uber, I drove Ubers, you know, to get a better understanding.
• 24:13
  Speaker 6: So when they said that, I swear to you, I thought, oh, OK,
• 24:16
  Speaker 6: this is like more just like to really understand what
• 24:20
  Speaker 6: these women go through. So I was kind of like, OK, great.
• 24:23
  Speaker 6: But there was something in the back of my mind
• 24:24
  Speaker 6: that I was like, this doesn't sound like that. So
• 24:28
  Speaker 6: then I just flat out asked, I was like, is
• 24:29
  Speaker 6: this for like the marketing job?
• 24:33
  Speaker 5: Like what job is this for? And they looked at
• 24:35
  Speaker 5: me weird.
• 24:36
  Speaker 6: It was like a literally who's on first conversation. They
• 24:38
  Speaker 6: were literally like, we've been talking about you being a housewife.
• 24:44
  Speaker 3: And I was like, is that what we're talking about?
• 24:46
  Speaker 3: I was like, why?
• 24:48
  Speaker 5: Why would you want me? I was so confused. But
• 24:51
  Speaker 5: then I was so fascinated because I was like, really?
• 24:54
  Speaker 6: Because when they explained, I mean, look, there's so many
• 24:56
  Speaker 6: different types of women, right? But I think at the
• 24:59
  Speaker 6: end of the day, you can categorize everybody into a
• 25:03
  Speaker 6: big general bucket.
• 25:05
  Speaker 5: Um, but they.
• 25:06
  Speaker 6: Didn't have a corporate executive outside of Jenna Lyons in
• 25:11
  Speaker 6: New York. Right. And I think at the time they
• 25:14
  Speaker 6: thought that she had been successful, you know, in that,
• 25:17
  Speaker 6: in her role. And so they were like, we can
• 25:19
  Speaker 6: do it again in Beverly Hills. And how about you?
• 25:22
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 25:22
  Speaker 6: So then I was like, oh my God, but I
• 25:24
  Speaker 6: respect and love Jenna. And so I was like, well,
• 25:26
  Speaker 6: she did it. Let me, let me see what this
• 25:28
  Speaker 6: is about. And so then I was like, okay, let's
• 25:31
  Speaker 6: try it.
• 25:31
  Speaker 7: Go ahead.
• 25:32
  Speaker 4: And, and, You know, I do think you're in a
• 25:36
  Speaker 4: good position in that you had a girl. Most of
• 25:40
  Speaker 4: the girls I've noticed, most of the daughters are more
• 25:44
  Speaker 4: open to being on camera than the boys.
• 25:46
  Speaker 3: Because it's a little more awkward for the boys. Or
• 25:48
  Speaker 3: they're like, what is this? That is a girly show.
• 25:50
  Speaker 5: Right, right, right.
• 25:50
  Speaker 3: So I thought that.
• 25:51
  Speaker 4: And she's beautiful and cute. And the other thing is,
• 25:56
  Speaker 4: you know, you may be, I don't, in the very beginning,
• 25:59
  Speaker 4: I don't know if you had dated him or you
• 26:00
  Speaker 4: just started to date your now fiance.
• 26:02
  Speaker 5: Oh yeah. I just started to date him.
• 26:04
  Speaker 4: I think that's kind of, you know, even though it's
• 26:06
  Speaker 4: called housewife and we want to see husbands, I do
• 26:09
  Speaker 4: think there's like less of a risk when you're coming
• 26:12
  Speaker 4: in without the husband that you've had for a while,
• 26:16
  Speaker 4: where if the cameras had come with your first husband,
• 26:20
  Speaker 4: we would have seen the.
• 26:21
  Speaker 3: Bickering and all that stuff.
• 26:23
  Speaker 4: And you, and you know, um, before you get better,
• 26:27
  Speaker 4: they would see the bickering and then that's exasperated. And
• 26:29
  Speaker 4: then people are like, Oh my God, did you see
• 26:31
  Speaker 4: what he said when he said you can't have a
• 26:33
  Speaker 4: tuna fish sandwich?
• 26:34
  Speaker 3: You know, whatever. So I think I've always think, but.
• 26:39
  Speaker 6: Even now, like, cause I've been dating, I think we've
• 26:42
  Speaker 6: been dating like six months or something like that.
• 26:44
  Speaker 5: Yeah. And, um, I was actually very surprised that he
• 26:48
  Speaker 5: was open to being on the show. Yeah.
• 26:50
  Speaker 6: But at that point, you know, we were deep in
• 26:53
  Speaker 6: very committed conversations. You know, it's like at that point,
• 26:57
  Speaker 6: I think we both knew they're like, OK, this this
• 26:59
  Speaker 6: is this is the thing.
• 27:01
  Speaker 5: Right.
• 27:01
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 27:01
  Speaker 6: And so when he was like, yeah, if you're going
• 27:04
  Speaker 6: to do it, then I'll do it with you. Like
• 27:06
  Speaker 6: if that's what you want me to do. Now it's like, really? Like, OK,
• 27:10
  Speaker 6: you know, I guess. But what if there's because I
• 27:12
  Speaker 6: already understood that. the pressure of what public life can
• 27:16
  Speaker 6: do to a relationship. I wasn't ignorant of that.
• 27:19
  Speaker 4: Right.
• 27:19
  Speaker 6: And I also want to be careful because he's not
• 27:23
  Speaker 6: necessarily somebody who is looking to be on camera, you know,
• 27:26
  Speaker 6: it wasn't like, he was like, oh yeah, sign me up.
• 27:29
  Speaker 6: Cause I want to be a real house husband, you know,
• 27:31
  Speaker 6: he wasn't that guy. And so I was like, okay, well,
• 27:34
  Speaker 6: don't worry. Cause you'll sort of just, you know, you'll
• 27:36
  Speaker 6: be in the back somewhere. And every now and again,
• 27:38
  Speaker 6: we'll talk about things. But what I was unaware of
• 27:41
  Speaker 6: is how deeply I would go into the things that
• 27:44
  Speaker 6: really do affect both of us. Like our journey to
• 27:48
  Speaker 6: have another child.
• 27:50
  Speaker 4: And in doing that, you know, not only are you
• 27:54
  Speaker 4: having to, you know, share it with your close friends
• 27:56
  Speaker 4: and family and maybe there's judgment there.
• 27:59
  Speaker 3: Like, why are you going for this?
• 28:00
  Speaker 5: Yes.
• 28:01
  Speaker 3: At your age, why are you going for this with
• 28:03
  Speaker 3: a man that's not your husband yet?
• 28:04
  Speaker 5: Yes.
• 28:05
  Speaker 4: But the audience is weighing in.
• 28:07
  Speaker 5: Oh, yeah. And that's what's so much pressure.
• 28:09
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 28:10
  Speaker 4: And listen, I mean, I enjoy the show and I
• 28:13
  Speaker 4: like you a lot on it.
• 28:15
  Speaker 3: I will be honest. I was like, I don't know
• 28:19
  Speaker 3: that she should tell you not to have another kid.
• 28:22
  Speaker 5: Right.
• 28:23
  Speaker 4: Well, you know, she is older and this guy, they're
• 28:27
  Speaker 4: not married yet.
• 28:28
  Speaker 3: I understand. But I understand the desire to want to
• 28:33
  Speaker 3: do it one more time.
• 28:34
  Speaker 4: Yes. And want to do it at a stage in
• 28:37
  Speaker 4: your life that you can have more time with that child.
• 28:40
  Speaker 3: Well, you know what I mean? Like your lifestyle would.
• 28:43
  Speaker 5: Allow you to, when you're a working mom. I have
• 28:45
  Speaker 5: more resources.
• 28:46
  Speaker 3: I was a working mom.
• 28:48
  Speaker 4: So like I left the house every day and sometimes like,
• 28:52
  Speaker 4: you know, my son is with me now and we
• 28:55
  Speaker 4: were driving and I go, see, this is where I
• 28:57
  Speaker 4: got up, got off the freeway for Chelsea Lately every day.
• 29:00
  Speaker 3: And it was Olympic and Bunny. And he's like, wow,
• 29:02
  Speaker 3: that was far.
• 29:03
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 29:04
  Speaker 3: From our house in Woodland Hills.
• 29:05
  Speaker 4: And I'm like, it was far. But I also knew
• 29:08
  Speaker 4: you have that one chance. And my kids are fine.
• 29:11
  Speaker 3: It's like, you know, but the guilt.
• 29:14
  Speaker 4: And there's that desire that I'm like, oh, my God.
• 29:18
  Speaker 4: Like just to go back and like do it again
• 29:20
  Speaker 4: and maybe have a nanny, but not have to go
• 29:23
  Speaker 4: to a nine to five every day or whatever.
• 29:25
  Speaker 5: So I understand that. Circumstances are very, very different.
• 29:28
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 29:28
  Speaker 4: So how did you guys come to the conclusion since
• 29:31
  Speaker 4: you weren't engaged yet? Like I could see maybe wanting
• 29:34
  Speaker 4: to do it maybe completely on your own, but I
• 29:36
  Speaker 4: also thought as such like a, you know, a woman
• 29:40
  Speaker 4: that gives such great advice and marketing, but there is
• 29:44
  Speaker 4: a risk, you know, that now what if you don't
• 29:46
  Speaker 4: get along with him and now you have to share
• 29:48
  Speaker 4: the child with him versus just being a single mother
• 29:51
  Speaker 4: from the start.
• 29:52
  Speaker 6: And that's why I was so surprised when people were
• 29:56
  Speaker 6: or the audience was judgmental about me having those conversations
• 30:00
  Speaker 6: before we said, I love you. Yeah. You know, like
• 30:02
  Speaker 6: for me, I was like, Oh no, look, I'm going
• 30:04
  Speaker 6: to clear all of the really big things before I'm
• 30:09
  Speaker 6: like into deep.
• 30:11
  Speaker 3: Oh, that's a good way.
• 30:12
  Speaker 5: I want to know because I'm too grown for this.
• 30:14
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 30:14
  Speaker 6: I'm not trying to fall in love and then find
• 30:15
  Speaker 6: out that you don't want a kid or that you, you.
• 30:18
  Speaker 5: Know, want seven.
• 30:19
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 30:20
  Speaker 5: I don't, I don't, I don't want to do that. Like,
• 30:22
  Speaker 5: I'm like, let's, let's talk.
• 30:23
  Speaker 6: Let's have all the hard conversations. And then we understand
• 30:26
  Speaker 6: whether or not we're on the same page.
• 30:27
  Speaker 5: By the way, not just.
• 30:29
  Speaker 6: About a kid, but like spiritually, emotionally, financially. Like I
• 30:35
  Speaker 6: want to have every conversation. People just want to focus
• 30:38
  Speaker 6: on like falling in love and like the butterflies and
• 30:41
  Speaker 6: like all of the like sparkly stuff. And I'm like, no,
• 30:44
  Speaker 6: the things that destroy you are those things. When you're
• 30:47
  Speaker 6: not on the same page, when you're not equally yoked,
• 30:49
  Speaker 6: that's what actually destroys a marriage. Not whether or not
• 30:52
  Speaker 6: somebody falls out of love.
• 30:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 30:54
  Speaker 5: You've been married a long time, right?
• 30:56
  Speaker 3: Right, yeah.
• 30:56
  Speaker 8: You know.
• 30:57
  Speaker 5: Look, the love is not just about the butterflies.
• 31:00
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 31:00
  Speaker 5: The love is the commitment every day to being like,
• 31:02
  Speaker 5: I'm with this person.
• 31:03
  Speaker 4: And the friendship and like, do you still like to
• 31:05
  Speaker 4: do fun? Like, can you still talk about fun things?
• 31:07
  Speaker 5: Can you still talk to this person? Are they your
• 31:09
  Speaker 5: closest friend? Are you intimate?
• 31:11
  Speaker 6: Not just physically, but emotionally and spiritually with this person. Like,
• 31:15
  Speaker 6: are they going to care for you? And that's what
• 31:18
  Speaker 6: I wanted to understand. If we were on the same page,
• 31:20
  Speaker 6: about a number of things. And also, and this is
• 31:24
  Speaker 6: the part where my emotions do play a part, which
• 31:27
  Speaker 6: is that I always wanted more children, but I was
• 31:33
  Speaker 6: too afraid. You know, I'd had such terrible- You.
• 31:37
  Speaker 3: Mean after your daughter- After Leo. And after your first
• 31:40
  Speaker 3: husband passed.
• 31:41
  Speaker 5: Yes.
• 31:42
  Speaker 3: You thought about, did.
• 31:43
  Speaker 5: You think about- I thought about it, I thought about it.
• 31:45
  Speaker 3: Of doing it on your own?
• 31:46
  Speaker 5: Girl, I thought about it.
• 31:47
  Speaker 6: And I was too afraid. You know, I was like,
• 31:50
  Speaker 6: first of all, I don't want to put my health
• 31:52
  Speaker 6: at risk. Right.
• 31:52
  Speaker 5: But yet I hadn't talked to any doctors.
• 31:54
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 31:55
  Speaker 5: I was just over here diagnosing myself. Right.
• 31:58
  Speaker 6: I was like, I don't want to do it without
• 32:00
  Speaker 6: a partner.
• 32:01
  Speaker 5: It's really hard to be a single mom. I don't know.
• 32:05
  Speaker 5: I'm barely surviving doing the one. I don't know if
• 32:06
  Speaker 5: I can do it with two or three. So I
• 32:10
  Speaker 5: didn't I didn't freeze my eggs. I didn't do anything.
• 32:12
  Speaker 6: Right.
• 32:13
  Speaker 5: You know, and now in hindsight, I wish I would have.
• 32:16
  Speaker 6: I wish I would have just moved on the desire
• 32:19
  Speaker 6: knowing that like, OK, well, let me just give myself
• 32:21
  Speaker 6: a chance.
• 32:21
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 32:22
  Speaker 5: You know, instead of putting it to bed before I even.
• 32:25
  Speaker 3: And where are you with it now?
• 32:28
  Speaker 6: Oh, well, right now. So my doctors are amazing and they've.
• 32:35
  Speaker 3: And why did you choose a doctor in Las Vegas?
• 32:37
  Speaker 6: Because she's a black woman who is one of the
• 32:39
  Speaker 6: leading specialists in fertility. You know, Black maternal health is
• 32:45
  Speaker 6: a very scary stat.
• 32:46
  Speaker 4: Yes.
• 32:46
  Speaker 5: More Black women die.
• 32:47
  Speaker 3: In childbirth than any other demographic.
• 32:49
  Speaker 5: I know. That's horrible.
• 32:49
  Speaker 3: I can't believe that that's kind of finally come to
• 32:52
  Speaker 3: the forefront.
• 32:53
  Speaker 5: Oh, yes.
• 32:54
  Speaker 3: I never was aware of that. That's absolutely horrific.
• 32:56
  Speaker 5: It's like two times the number.
• 32:58
  Speaker 3: That is insane.
• 32:59
  Speaker 5: It's insane.
• 33:00
  Speaker 3: And so sad.
• 33:01
  Speaker 6: And horrible and terrifying. So I'm like, look, I already
• 33:04
  Speaker 6: risked my life one time. I'm not trying to do
• 33:06
  Speaker 6: it again.
• 33:06
  Speaker 5: So Dr. Cindy is a Dr. Cindy Duke is wonderful.
• 33:12
  Speaker 6: And so she put me through the battery because, you know,
• 33:15
  Speaker 6: she was like, look, you are healthy enough to carry
• 33:17
  Speaker 6: a child. She's like, I'm 49. I'm almost 50. she's like,
• 33:21
  Speaker 6: you could probably carry baby till you're 56. And I'm like,
• 33:24
  Speaker 6: I don't believe you.
• 33:25
  Speaker 5: Like, what are you talking about? Girl, when I tell
• 33:27
  Speaker 5: you I've.
• 33:27
  Speaker 6: Been to every specialist, like my cardiologist, like everybody, done
• 33:33
  Speaker 6: all the blood work, everything to make sure that I'm okay.
• 33:37
  Speaker 5: Psychologically, it's a different story.
• 33:39
  Speaker 6: You know, I've obviously had a lot of therapy to
• 33:41
  Speaker 6: manage my grief and all the things, but I hadn't
• 33:46
  Speaker 6: dealt with this in particular. You know, in that like,
• 33:51
  Speaker 6: I've dealt with the grief of losing Eve. I've dealt
• 33:53
  Speaker 6: with the grief of losing my husband. I've dealt with
• 33:55
  Speaker 6: the scariness of getting into another relationship. Like I've done
• 33:59
  Speaker 6: those things. I hadn't yet tackled the having another baby
• 34:03
  Speaker 6: grief and scare.
• 34:06
  Speaker 5: Um, and so I needed to do that work.
• 34:08
  Speaker 6: Uh, but at the same time I was like, well,
• 34:09
  Speaker 6: let me just go ahead and, you know, get, do
• 34:12
  Speaker 6: my fibroid surgery, which I did on the show. Right.
• 34:16
  Speaker 5: Uh, let me go ahead and get these eggs retrieved.
• 34:18
  Speaker 6: And there's a lot of stress and you know, all
• 34:23
  Speaker 6: due respect to the people who go through IVF because
• 34:25
  Speaker 6: that joint is not.
• 34:26
  Speaker 4: Easy my sister had to do it yeah oh my
• 34:28
  Speaker 4: god but she was successful well I'm so glad yeah
• 34:31
  Speaker 4: yeah but it was a long time ago they were
• 34:33
  Speaker 4: like 20 you know he's 22 now and then she
• 34:36
  Speaker 4: got pregnant naturally after isn't.
• 34:38
  Speaker 6: That wild she's my best friend by the way she
• 34:40
  Speaker 6: went through IVF we're the same age yeah and so
• 34:42
  Speaker 6: now she has two toddlers yeah so that's why I'm
• 34:45
  Speaker 6: just like bitches I could do it look at my
• 34:48
  Speaker 6: girl she did it you know she went through IVF
• 34:50
  Speaker 6: and then got pregnant naturally crazy but anyway very long
• 34:53
  Speaker 6: story short I have I've decided to take a break
• 34:57
  Speaker 6: for a moment we're gonna get through our weddings and
• 35:00
  Speaker 6: then we're gonna pick it up again I'm not sure
• 35:03
  Speaker 6: if I will you know go through retrieval again but
• 35:05
  Speaker 6: you know there are other options there's egg donors yeah
• 35:09
  Speaker 6: a number of things surrogates there's you know because I'm
• 35:12
  Speaker 6: not even sure necessarily that I want to carry the
• 35:15
  Speaker 6: baby Right.
• 35:16
  Speaker 5: So we'll see.
• 35:17
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, why not just do the safest thing
• 35:19
  Speaker 3: for you?
• 35:20
  Speaker 5: Yeah, exactly.
• 35:21
  Speaker 4: So getting to, okay, so we're on the reunion. And
• 35:26
  Speaker 4: by the way, I'm not just saying this because you're here,
• 35:29
  Speaker 4: because I put this under some comment. When I saw
• 35:32
  Speaker 4: everyone's dress, I was like, this is the best dress.
• 35:36
  Speaker 3: Thank you.
• 35:36
  Speaker 4: And the best for you and your body and your
• 35:39
  Speaker 4: coloring and your shape.
• 35:40
  Speaker 5: Yes.
• 35:41
  Speaker 3: And the gold earrings. It was stunning.
• 35:44
  Speaker 4: So really, really good. And then I know it was heavy.
• 35:49
  Speaker 4: You probably felt it in your abs the next day.
• 35:52
  Speaker 3: It was crazy.
• 35:52
  Speaker 6: My arms even like there was the sound guy had
• 35:57
  Speaker 6: to mic me and, you know, it's simple. You just
• 36:00
  Speaker 6: put your arm up and these maneuver. And dude, it
• 36:03
  Speaker 6: was like 10 seconds. I was like, hey, hey, hey,
• 36:05
  Speaker 6: how quickly can we get this done? Because I was like,
• 36:08
  Speaker 6: can somebody hold my hand for me? Yeah, it was
• 36:11
  Speaker 6: a very, very heavy dress. But the designer I work
• 36:15
  Speaker 6: with in Ghana is a complete like, you know, I
• 36:19
  Speaker 6: think if she could make like, we're just perfectly matched
• 36:24
  Speaker 6: because she is a very understated person, but an extravagant designer.
• 36:29
  Speaker 6: So if I just let her loose, She would do
• 36:32
  Speaker 6: absolutely craziness. And this was a crazy amount of dress.
• 36:36
  Speaker 3: It is stunning.
• 36:37
  Speaker 5: And she flew the dress, you know, from Ghana.
• 36:39
  Speaker 3: Oh, my gosh. Yeah.
• 36:41
  Speaker 5: Like, amazing.
• 36:43
  Speaker 3: And so here you guys all are.
• 36:45
  Speaker 8: Yes.
• 36:45
  Speaker 3: Yeah, and I love Jennifer Tilly's.
• 36:47
  Speaker 5: Oh, Jennifer Tilly's is fantastic.
• 36:49
  Speaker 1: Amazing.
• 36:49
  Speaker 3: I thought it was so fun. I'll be honest.
• 36:52
  Speaker 4: I said I liked yours and Jennifer Tilly's.
• 36:54
  Speaker 8: Yeah.
• 36:55
  Speaker 6: I think that's all I said. Sutton looked really good, though.
• 36:57
  Speaker 6: I thought Sutton looked the best that she's looked.
• 36:59
  Speaker 3: Sutton looked really pretty. That was pretty.
• 37:01
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 37:02
  Speaker 3: But if I'm just.
• 37:03
  Speaker 4: Listen, I've watched this for a long time. And it's...
• 37:06
  Speaker 4: I think you're sitting on the couch... Yes. So you
• 37:09
  Speaker 4: have to make sure that, A, you don't have a pooch, B,
• 37:12
  Speaker 4: that you're not wearing such a challenging kind of silkiness
• 37:15
  Speaker 4: that it gets wrinkly.
• 37:17
  Speaker 5: Right.
• 37:17
  Speaker 4: So I do think tight bodice beading works really, actually
• 37:21
  Speaker 4: really well. It's uncomfortable, but I think that's the way
• 37:24
  Speaker 4: to go.
• 37:24
  Speaker 5: Keep structure.
• 37:26
  Speaker 3: For a reunion look. Okay, so let's get into it.
• 37:29
  Speaker 3: The show.
• 37:30
  Speaker 5: Yes.
• 37:31
  Speaker 3: So basically this season... You know, it was.
• 37:35
  Speaker 4: Really Dorit feeling that, you know, she's being criticized and whatnot.
• 37:41
  Speaker 4: And PK just did an interview that came out. Right.
• 37:45
  Speaker 4: And I listened to most of it. And he comes off,
• 37:48
  Speaker 4: you know, he's a nice, likable guy. He comes off,
• 37:50
  Speaker 4: you know, humble, tells.
• 37:51
  Speaker 3: About his life. Yeah. But when he kind of said, like, well,
• 37:55
  Speaker 3: I wish you wouldn't have done it so publicly. Here's
• 37:58
  Speaker 3: the thing. If you're on a reality show and you're
• 38:00
  Speaker 3: being real, any woman.
• 38:03
  Speaker 4: going through a divorce, especially one that takes more than
• 38:08
  Speaker 4: one season of a TV show, most don't, you are
• 38:11
  Speaker 4: going to vent to your girlfriends.
• 38:14
  Speaker 5: Absolutely.
• 38:15
  Speaker 4: So if she was to not share her feelings and frustrations,
• 38:19
  Speaker 4: then she would not be doing her job.
• 38:21
  Speaker 5: And she wouldn't be. And she'd be criticized for that. Yeah, right.
• 38:24
  Speaker 3: Exactly.
• 38:25
  Speaker 4: And it's like, you're getting divorced for a reason, you know?
• 38:28
  Speaker 3: I actually had Natalie on.
• 38:31
  Speaker 5: Oh, yes.
• 38:33
  Speaker 4: And, you know, I was like, I want to know, like,
• 38:35
  Speaker 4: how is it to be, like, basically in it but
• 38:38
  Speaker 4: not really in it, you know? And she was very interesting,
• 38:40
  Speaker 4: and she just said, you know, I'm like, how's your divorce?
• 38:43
  Speaker 3: She's like, it's fine, but we're getting divorced. Like, we're
• 38:46
  Speaker 3: not getting married. I mean, nobody has.
• 38:49
  Speaker 4: And I kind of thought when she said, when Dorit
• 38:51
  Speaker 4: said to Kyle, like, I hope that it's nice forever.
• 38:55
  Speaker 6: Mm-hmm.
• 38:56
  Speaker 4: But this interesting situation you have with Mauricio, and I
• 39:00
  Speaker 4: get why no one wants to bite the bullet.
• 39:02
  Speaker 3: Multiple homes, kids, all this.
• 39:05
  Speaker 4: And also, just like, who wants to even clean out
• 39:07
  Speaker 4: a drawer, let alone move and split shit and split
• 39:10
  Speaker 4: businesses and multiple homes?
• 39:11
  Speaker 5: It's very difficult.
• 39:12
  Speaker 3: I get all that.
• 39:13
  Speaker 4: So I think, but I also think Kyle was trying to,
• 39:17
  Speaker 4: you know, was also being nice. But I think, yeah,
• 39:21
  Speaker 4: in the end, you got to choose your girlfriend, right?
• 39:26
  Speaker 5: Yes, you do. You really do. And that's where I
• 39:28
  Speaker 5: found myself in. a conundrum.
• 39:31
  Speaker 4: Yes.
• 39:31
  Speaker 5: Right?
• 39:32
  Speaker 6: Because I believe multiple things can be true at one time.
• 39:36
  Speaker 6: And Dorit and I, even though, you know, you didn't
• 39:39
  Speaker 6: see a lot of it, we got into quite a
• 39:42
  Speaker 6: bit of conflict over it.
• 39:43
  Speaker 5: Oh, you did? Yeah, because I would defend Kyle.
• 39:46
  Speaker 3: Oh, that's right.
• 39:47
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 39:47
  Speaker 5: You know, I would say, like, she cares about you.
• 39:52
  Speaker 5: And Dorit doesn't believe it.
• 39:53
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 39:54
  Speaker 5: But I was like, hey, look, there are certain things
• 39:56
  Speaker 5: that she's doing that, to me, prove that she cares.
• 39:59
  Speaker 5: I agree, too. She may not be right.
• 40:02
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 40:03
  Speaker 6: Because, like, I don't hold the same opinion with Kyle
• 40:06
  Speaker 6: about whether or not Dorit should talk about PK. I
• 40:08
  Speaker 6: think she should. I think she should do whatever the
• 40:10
  Speaker 6: hell she wants to do. She's a grown woman. Let
• 40:12
  Speaker 6: her talk if she wants to. Kyle does not believe that.
• 40:14
  Speaker 6: But it doesn't mean that I don't think she cares
• 40:16
  Speaker 6: about Dorit.
• 40:17
  Speaker 3: You know what I mean?
• 40:18
  Speaker 4: And then Dorit had a good point when she's like,
• 40:20
  Speaker 4: you said I was being erratic, darling baby.
• 40:24
  Speaker 3: You said I was being erratic. And I'm like, well, again,
• 40:27
  Speaker 3: Kyle is doing her job.
• 40:29
  Speaker 4: Yeah. We've all been with girlfriends. And we do talk
• 40:35
  Speaker 4: behind each other's backs. It doesn't mean it's malicious.
• 40:38
  Speaker 5: Right.
• 40:39
  Speaker 3: It means, okay, hey.
• 40:41
  Speaker 7: Right.
• 40:42
  Speaker 6: Right.
• 40:43
  Speaker 4: Are you getting the feeling that she's just, should not
• 40:45
  Speaker 4: be like rolling like this and talking and spending this
• 40:48
  Speaker 4: kind of money?
• 40:49
  Speaker 3: So I'm like, yeah, she's being honest too. You would
• 40:53
  Speaker 3: have said that. Yeah.
• 40:55
  Speaker 6: And also like, I felt that like, and I think
• 40:57
  Speaker 6: I said this, I don't know if it made it
• 40:59
  Speaker 6: or not. So you tell me if it did, but, um,
• 41:02
  Speaker 6: I said, you know, Kyle and I friend differently.
• 41:05
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 41:05
  Speaker 1: Right?
• 41:05
  Speaker 5: Which is also okay. We don't have to be the
• 41:08
  Speaker 5: same type of friend.
• 41:08
  Speaker 3: I kind of love that expression. Have you ever said
• 41:10
  Speaker 3: that before?
• 41:11
  Speaker 5: I've never said that before.
• 41:12
  Speaker 3: We friend differently. It's kind of genius.
• 41:15
  Speaker 5: Okay, well, that's good.
• 41:16
  Speaker 3: Let's keep that. It's very interesting because it's true.
• 41:19
  Speaker 4: And you should have a different kind of friend. And
• 41:21
  Speaker 4: as we get older, yeah, and I've said this for
• 41:23
  Speaker 4: like years because I'm like, women, you know, will be
• 41:27
  Speaker 4: so supportive.
• 41:28
  Speaker 3: Kick him to the curb.
• 41:29
  Speaker 5: Da-da-da.
• 41:30
  Speaker 3: You're done with him.
• 41:31
  Speaker 4: You know, get rid of your husband who was your
• 41:34
  Speaker 4: dad of your three kids.
• 41:35
  Speaker 3: Fuck him.
• 41:36
  Speaker 4: But then you're like, I can't believe that you and
• 41:38
  Speaker 4: Jenny aren't friends anymore. What the fuck is wrong with that?
• 41:41
  Speaker 4: Sometimes friendships are like a marriage without the sex.
• 41:44
  Speaker 5: Yes, yes, yes, yes.
• 41:45
  Speaker 3: And sometimes it can't last forever.
• 41:49
  Speaker 5: Oh, my God. For sure.
• 41:50
  Speaker 3: And sometimes it has seasons and it has breakups.
• 41:53
  Speaker 5: And sometimes it ends.
• 41:54
  Speaker 4: And you can't, just like a couple that can't get
• 41:57
  Speaker 4: back to... regularly having sex and being loving. Sometimes a
• 42:02
  Speaker 4: friendship that's so close on the phone five times a
• 42:04
  Speaker 4: day has a break and they can get back to
• 42:08
  Speaker 4: a place, but it's not ever going to be the
• 42:10
  Speaker 4: place of the constant calling you every time I got
• 42:14
  Speaker 4: in the car type of friend, you know?
• 42:15
  Speaker 6: Right. And that's what I really, I think at the
• 42:17
  Speaker 6: end of the day, what I would love for them
• 42:20
  Speaker 6: is just peace.
• 42:21
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 42:21
  Speaker 5: You know, civility.
• 42:22
  Speaker 6: It's like, you won't get back to where you were, okay?
• 42:26
  Speaker 6: And by the way, I called it during my first season.
• 42:30
  Speaker 6: I think we were like two weeks in where I
• 42:32
  Speaker 6: was just like, oh, y'all don't trust each other.
• 42:34
  Speaker 5: That's what's going on here.
• 42:35
  Speaker 6: And then somebody pulled me to the side and was
• 42:37
  Speaker 6: just like, you kind of got to let them talk.
• 42:38
  Speaker 5: I was like, oh, okay, let me just, let me relax.
• 42:41
  Speaker 5: Let me not diagnose.
• 42:42
  Speaker 3: Was that weird when you first entered?
• 42:45
  Speaker 4: Because I feel like with Natalie, it was like, because
• 42:49
  Speaker 4: she really wasn't part of it and she like came
• 42:51
  Speaker 4: later in the season. Yeah, if you were at a
• 42:54
  Speaker 4: dinner party where you didn't know anybody and that's her
• 42:56
  Speaker 4: personality to kind of sit back.
• 42:58
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 42:58
  Speaker 3: But you're a little bit like me and I would be.
• 43:01
  Speaker 5: Oh, I'm jumping right in there.
• 43:01
  Speaker 3: I would be jumping right in.
• 43:02
  Speaker 7: In the middle.
• 43:03
  Speaker 3: And then they'd be like... Hold on, baby. Wait till
• 43:06
  Speaker 3: you learn more. You don't know anything.
• 43:08
  Speaker 5: Sit down.
• 43:08
  Speaker 3: But you're like, okay, but like. Yeah.
• 43:10
  Speaker 5: But also I've had 25 years.
• 43:13
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 43:13
  Speaker 5: Of having to mediate quickly.
• 43:16
  Speaker 6: Right.
• 43:16
  Speaker 5: You know what I mean? Like that's what I do
• 43:17
  Speaker 5: for a living.
• 43:18
  Speaker 6: Like I, you know, you can't have conflict in the
• 43:21
  Speaker 6: workplace because when you do, it costs money.
• 43:24
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 43:24
  Speaker 5: And so I am very practiced. However, in this situation,
• 43:27
  Speaker 5: I had to learn to just sit back.
• 43:29
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 43:29
  Speaker 5: And be like, okay. Let them figure it out for themselves.
• 43:33
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 43:33
  Speaker 6: Let them argue. Let them figure out their differences.
• 43:38
  Speaker 4: What's really interesting and sad is they weren't just two
• 43:43
  Speaker 4: girlfriends that met on a TV show.
• 43:45
  Speaker 3: They had a fun foursome.
• 43:48
  Speaker 5: Yes.
• 43:48
  Speaker 3: With the husbands.
• 43:49
  Speaker 5: I know, with the husbands.
• 43:51
  Speaker 3: And there, that one scene.
• 43:53
  Speaker 4: That they laughed at, you know, Erica's ex-husband, Tom Girardi,
• 44:00
  Speaker 4: Are they divorced?
• 44:01
  Speaker 3: I don't think they're divorced, no.
• 44:04
  Speaker 4: And when she had that famous scene where she's like,
• 44:07
  Speaker 4: Tom got in a car accident, rolled down the hill,
• 44:09
  Speaker 4: got his eye falling out, whatever that.
• 44:10
  Speaker 5: Whole story was.
• 44:12
  Speaker 4: And PK's like, you know, what do you mean they
• 44:16
  Speaker 4: operated on the ankle?
• 44:18
  Speaker 3: You go for the head, he's a lawyer, he's not
• 44:20
  Speaker 3: a fucking soccer player.
• 44:21
  Speaker 5: And they're all like.
• 44:22
  Speaker 3: Laughing, laughing, crying, laughing. That scene is what is so
• 44:28
  Speaker 3: sad about where they are.
• 44:29
  Speaker 5: Yes, about where they are right now.
• 44:30
  Speaker 3: That the marriages are not what they are, that they'll
• 44:32
  Speaker 3: never be.
• 44:32
  Speaker 5: And then the friendships are.
• 44:34
  Speaker 3: And then the friendships, because.
• 44:37
  Speaker 4: Kyle is still friendly with Mauricio, so they know she's
• 44:39
  Speaker 4: hearing the sides of, you know, and that's really hard
• 44:43
  Speaker 4: because it's always like, especially when it's like custody and
• 44:46
  Speaker 4: you know, is someone a good dad or, you know,
• 44:48
  Speaker 4: did he, did she really keep the kids from him
• 44:51
  Speaker 4: or was there an, was it supposed to be Saturday
• 44:54
  Speaker 4: morning at nine and she wasn't back from coffee yet.
• 44:56
  Speaker 3: And then it's like, you're not at the door. Like
• 44:59
  Speaker 3: those stories.
• 45:00
  Speaker 5: I mean, it's so bad.
• 45:02
  Speaker 4: We all have a friend that's lived through it or
• 45:05
  Speaker 4: been through it ourselves with the exchanges. Let's exchange the
• 45:08
  Speaker 4: police department because you said I threw a baby blanket
• 45:11
  Speaker 4: at you.
• 45:11
  Speaker 9: Like it's just, it's miserable it is miserable and then
• 45:16
  Speaker 9: you know so i don't know i i like i
• 45:19
  Speaker 9: see where it's at and i get how she kind
• 45:24
  Speaker 9: of got to this like fuck it place yeah you.
• 45:27
  Speaker 6: Know it's very clear to me yeah it's very very
• 45:30
  Speaker 6: clear because she has felt like hey look these women
• 45:33
  Speaker 6: have known me a long time um They should.
• 45:37
  Speaker 5: Have my back, like point blank, period.
• 45:39
  Speaker 6: You know, I don't want to hear his side and
• 45:43
  Speaker 6: look at it from this angle and.
• 45:44
  Speaker 5: Let's play devil and advocate. I don't want to hear
• 45:46
  Speaker 5: any of that.
• 45:46
  Speaker 6: Yeah. And she's maybe in a year she'll be willing
• 45:51
  Speaker 6: to hear that. But right now she's in quite hot anger.
• 45:55
  Speaker 8: Right.
• 45:56
  Speaker 6: And you kind of just need to let her burn.
• 45:59
  Speaker 6: You know, it's like, look, but also, again, this is
• 46:02
  Speaker 6: why you friend differently. I am that friend that if
• 46:05
  Speaker 6: you're having a problem with somebody, you probably want to
• 46:06
  Speaker 6: call me.
• 46:07
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 46:07
  Speaker 5: Because I'm going to be the one who's like, drop
• 46:09
  Speaker 5: their location right now. Let's go over there. Yeah.
• 46:12
  Speaker 6: I'm not the friend you call if you want to
• 46:14
  Speaker 6: be soothed and like, oh.
• 46:16
  Speaker 5: No, just forgive him.
• 46:17
  Speaker 3: You're not the, let's play devil's advocate.
• 46:19
  Speaker 1: I am not.
• 46:20
  Speaker 4: Sometimes I'm like, listen, my sister is my best friend,
• 46:23
  Speaker 4: and she is a criminal defense attorney.
• 46:24
  Speaker 8: Oh.
• 46:25
  Speaker 4: And sometimes I have to now, in our friendship and
• 46:28
  Speaker 4: sisterhood— go, I'm just gonna bitch, and I actually don't
• 46:32
  Speaker 4: want to hear the other side.
• 46:33
  Speaker 3: I don't want to hear the other side.
• 46:35
  Speaker 4: I just want you to just, I just need to vent,
• 46:38
  Speaker 4: and she'll do the same to me.
• 46:40
  Speaker 5: And I'll be the friend who's gonna be like, and
• 46:42
  Speaker 5: then what'd he do? Ah, that asshole. You know what
• 46:45
  Speaker 5: I mean? Because also I feel it.
• 46:49
  Speaker 6: Like I feel it from my girl and I want
• 46:51
  Speaker 6: to make sure that like I'm looking at the situation
• 46:54
  Speaker 6: through her eyes. And so there are different friends who
• 46:57
  Speaker 6: do it differently. And that is fantastic. You probably do
• 47:00
  Speaker 6: need to call her so she can tell you to
• 47:02
  Speaker 6: calm your ass down.
• 47:03
  Speaker 5: Don't call me.
• 47:04
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 47:04
  Speaker 4: And I mean, you know, and PK even goes, oh,
• 47:06
  Speaker 4: a lot of things aren't true. And, you know, a
• 47:08
  Speaker 4: lot of things he says this and it, you know,
• 47:09
  Speaker 4: we're from production.
• 47:11
  Speaker 5: Are you doing his accent right now?
• 47:12
  Speaker 1: I'm not.
• 47:12
  Speaker 3: I'm half doing it. But it's just, I'm thinking about it, but, like,
• 47:16
  Speaker 3: I won't do it. Because, you know, I just, like, no.
• 47:18
  Speaker 4: But he was saying, like, you know, oh, some things
• 47:21
  Speaker 4: aren't real and production, you know, pushes for things and
• 47:23
  Speaker 4: all that. And we haven't seen their whole marriage. And
• 47:28
  Speaker 4: it seems to me she has revealed... that they got
• 47:31
  Speaker 4: to that place where they were both saying pretty fucking
• 47:35
  Speaker 4: below the belt type of stuff, which is very hard
• 47:37
  Speaker 4: to come back from.
• 47:39
  Speaker 3: But also, when someone's like, well, I like PK. He's
• 47:42
  Speaker 3: always been nice to me.
• 47:44
  Speaker 4: I always go, yeah, there's busboys all over Beverly Hills
• 47:46
  Speaker 4: that said OJ was the nicest guy in the world.
• 47:48
  Speaker 3: We all know it. We all know it. I'm not
• 47:51
  Speaker 3: comparing PK to OJ.
• 47:52
  Speaker 4: But I'm saying, what your relationship with someone as a friend,
• 47:56
  Speaker 4: as a businessman, whatever, is never going to be the
• 47:58
  Speaker 4: same as someone has as an intimate partner who was
• 48:03
  Speaker 4: married and raised kids.
• 48:05
  Speaker 3: Every marriage is different.
• 48:06
  Speaker 4: And you don't know what she said to him that
• 48:09
  Speaker 4: made it a point of no return or whatever. And
• 48:13
  Speaker 4: so I think that that's what's so hard about getting
• 48:18
  Speaker 4: divorced and figuring out who's going to pay for what.
• 48:22
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 48:23
  Speaker 5: But at the end of the day, you need your friends.
• 48:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 48:26
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 48:27
  Speaker 6: To me, that's where we can no longer have a conversation.
• 48:30
  Speaker 6: I'm like, you need your friends. Everybody rally. And honestly,
• 48:37
  Speaker 6: because every marriage is different and therefore every divorce is different, you.
• 48:41
  Speaker 5: Need different rallies.
• 48:43
  Speaker 6: Kyle wants her very intimate circle and she won't reveal
• 48:49
  Speaker 6: anything to anybody who's not in that. And that's what
• 48:52
  Speaker 6: I had to learn in my first season because I
• 48:55
  Speaker 6: did feel like she was cold. But I had to
• 48:57
  Speaker 6: learn that like, oh, because she's not going to reveal
• 48:59
  Speaker 6: anything to me. You know, whereas like I was comparing
• 49:02
  Speaker 6: her to Dorit. Dorit's out here telling me all of
• 49:05
  Speaker 6: her business.
• 49:06
  Speaker 4: You know, when I first met Kyle years ago, like
• 49:09
  Speaker 4: at parties and things like that, I've been interviewing housewives
• 49:11
  Speaker 4: for years. I thought she was a little aloof. And
• 49:16
  Speaker 4: then she came on the show and she was just
• 49:18
  Speaker 4: one of my favorite interviews.
• 49:19
  Speaker 3: So it's like.
• 49:20
  Speaker 4: I think just sometimes people and people say I'm sometimes
• 49:23
  Speaker 4: you know A little like, you know, a little dismissive.
• 49:28
  Speaker 4: And I'm like, well, I'm sorry if I was distracted.
• 49:30
  Speaker 4: Like there's things like that where it can. So sometimes
• 49:33
  Speaker 4: it's good that you, you know.
• 49:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 49:35
  Speaker 4: Took some time and kind of get for what her
• 49:38
  Speaker 4: qualities are and everything.
• 49:39
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 49:39
  Speaker 5: And also getting to know each other better.
• 49:41
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 49:41
  Speaker 6: Kyle is for sure somebody who needs to get to
• 49:44
  Speaker 6: know you. And she's been around the business a long time.
• 49:47
  Speaker 6: She's been around a lot of different type of people
• 49:49
  Speaker 6: a long time. She needs to build trust first, you know?
• 49:51
  Speaker 6: And I'm now okay with that, right? Where I didn't
• 49:54
  Speaker 6: understand that in the beginning. And so we're in a
• 49:56
  Speaker 6: very different place in our friendship. However, with Dorit, it
• 49:59
  Speaker 6: was totally different, right? Within the first two minutes, she
• 50:02
  Speaker 6: was telling me all the business that was going on
• 50:04
  Speaker 6: with PK. And so I was like, oh, okay, look,
• 50:07
  Speaker 6: the way we need to rally around Dorit is different
• 50:10
  Speaker 6: from the way we need to rally around Kyle. And
• 50:12
  Speaker 6: now different from the way we need to rally around
• 50:15
  Speaker 6: Rachel and her divorce. Different from the way we need
• 50:17
  Speaker 6: to rally around Sutton as her marriage is annulled.
• 50:21
  Speaker 5: You know, it's like.
• 50:21
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that was like the most horrible thing of all.
• 50:24
  Speaker 3: Oh my God, awful. And he's like dating her ex-friend.
• 50:27
  Speaker 5: I can't even. See, and that's what I'm telling you.
• 50:30
  Speaker 6: You should not tell me that kind of stuff because
• 50:32
  Speaker 6: I will be like, where is she at?
• 50:34
  Speaker 5: Let's go over there now. Okay?
• 50:37
  Speaker 6: Even when Kyle and I weren't like super chummy... I mean,
• 50:41
  Speaker 6: we said it on the show where I saw Mo
• 50:43
  Speaker 6: at freaking Soul House in Malibu. And he was there
• 50:47
  Speaker 6: with the woman that he'd been photographed with. Look, Kyle
• 50:50
  Speaker 6: and I weren't like talking, talking, talking. I called her immediately.
• 50:55
  Speaker 5: And I was like, girl, you want me to push
• 50:56
  Speaker 5: him into the ocean? What would you like me to do?
• 50:58
  Speaker 6: And then when I got home, I gave her a
• 51:00
  Speaker 6: six-minute voice note, giving her the play-by-play.
• 51:03
  Speaker 3: On everything I saw. You know what I'm saying? You
• 51:06
  Speaker 3: want to know what she was wearing, what they ate?
• 51:08
  Speaker 5: I am that friend.
• 51:09
  Speaker 6: And so I'm like, but it is different for everybody.
• 51:14
  Speaker 6: And even to the point about Sutton, I didn't know
• 51:17
  Speaker 6: anything about the annulment or whatnot. And so when we
• 51:20
  Speaker 6: met up after last summer and she said that this
• 51:24
  Speaker 6: had happened.
• 51:25
  Speaker 5: I immediately was just like, girl, what? Who would do that?
• 51:28
  Speaker 5: What kind of person would try to take that from you?
• 51:31
  Speaker 4: I didn't like it because as a Catholic, I know
• 51:35
  Speaker 4: how hard it is to get something annulled. And it
• 51:37
  Speaker 4: made me think with his power and connections, it made
• 51:41
  Speaker 4: me go, hmm, I don't really like that.
• 51:43
  Speaker 3: That seems a little fishy to me.
• 51:45
  Speaker 5: Well, I met the Pope.
• 51:47
  Speaker 4: Oh, wow.
• 51:48
  Speaker 3: The new Pope.
• 51:49
  Speaker 5: The new Pope.
• 51:49
  Speaker 6: Pope Leo.
• 51:49
  Speaker 5: The Chicago Pope.
• 51:50
  Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 51:51
  Speaker 5: I was at the Vatican during Holy Week.
• 51:53
  Speaker 3: Oh, my gosh. Fun.
• 51:54
  Speaker 5: And I was like, son, you want me to talk
• 51:56
  Speaker 5: to him about this or no, man?
• 51:57
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 51:58
  Speaker 5: Would you like me to tell Pope Leo?
• 52:00
  Speaker 3: Wait, how did you meet the Pope?
• 52:02
  Speaker 5: Oh, it was great. It was great.
• 52:03
  Speaker 6: So my friend, George Rapier, who owns Villa Bibiani, which
• 52:07
  Speaker 6: is where I took the girls in Tuscany, you know,
• 52:11
  Speaker 6: he has all the connections everywhere over in Tuscany. And
• 52:15
  Speaker 6: we were there for Holy Week because it was spring break.
• 52:17
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 52:18
  Speaker 6: I was like, oh, my God, it'd be great to have, like,
• 52:20
  Speaker 6: Easter at the Vatican. And so Stefano, who runs the
• 52:25
  Speaker 6: villa and the vineyards, was like, oh. Yeah, we have
• 52:27
  Speaker 6: a connection to the Vatican. You want me to see
• 52:30
  Speaker 6: if you can go?
• 52:30
  Speaker 5: And I was like, oh, yeah, get us an audience.
• 52:32
  Speaker 6: And so we had, you know, the opportunity to go
• 52:35
  Speaker 6: to mass. And then at the very last minute, here
• 52:39
  Speaker 6: comes the invitation to, like, meet the pope and talk
• 52:41
  Speaker 6: to him.
• 52:42
  Speaker 5: And I was like.
• 52:43
  Speaker 3: Wait, do you have a photo with him?
• 52:44
  Speaker 4: Oh, yeah.
• 52:44
  Speaker 3: But it wasn't on your Instagram.
• 52:46
  Speaker 1: Yes, it was.
• 52:46
  Speaker 5: I did a whole, like, reel. I saw you in.
• 52:48
  Speaker 3: Your Easter outfit. Oh, but I was only on the grid.
• 52:52
  Speaker 5: Oh, yeah. Well, I have a... Let's see, what's that one?
• 52:55
  Speaker 6: Vivienne.
• 52:56
  Speaker 5: Oh, yeah, yeah, keep going. I think it's the next one.
• 52:58
  Speaker 3: No, I didn't take every one, though.
• 52:59
  Speaker 5: Oh, you didn't. Okay, okay.
• 53:00
  Speaker 3: Well, I'll throw it up in here. Yeah, well, me
• 53:02
  Speaker 3: and Pope Leo.
• 53:03
  Speaker 5: Oh, I wrote him a letter, girl. I hand wrote it.
• 53:06
  Speaker 3: So, well, what do you think?
• 53:07
  Speaker 5: I cried when I saw him.
• 53:08
  Speaker 3: How do you think that he got that annulment? Oh, yeah.
• 53:12
  Speaker 4: Not that it was the Pope doing it, but I'm
• 53:14
  Speaker 4: just saying there has to be some type of connection.
• 53:17
  Speaker 5: It had to be. It's too hard.
• 53:19
  Speaker 3: Kids who also went to Catholic school.
• 53:20
  Speaker 6: Yeah, it's too hard to get to the Pope, first
• 53:22
  Speaker 6: of all. I mean, I say it casually, but it's
• 53:24
  Speaker 6: very difficult to get to the Pope. It is hard
• 53:26
  Speaker 6: to undo. A marriage within the Catholic Church. I just,
• 53:30
  Speaker 6: I don't know how he did it. All I know
• 53:32
  Speaker 6: is that it took a lot of effort and was
• 53:34
  Speaker 6: quite intentional.
• 53:35
  Speaker 4: And is he doing that because he wants to marry
• 53:37
  Speaker 4: this ex-friend of hers?
• 53:38
  Speaker 5: I would assume so. Because you can't.
• 53:40
  Speaker 3: Get remarried in the church now.
• 53:42
  Speaker 5: Yeah, it has to be an oath.
• 53:43
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 53:43
  Speaker 6: So that's what I would assume. Why would you go
• 53:45
  Speaker 6: through all that trouble unless you wanted to get married?
• 53:47
  Speaker 4: And also that you're with a woman that feels that,
• 53:50
  Speaker 4: or maybe he did too. to feel that strongly about
• 53:52
  Speaker 4: that the second marriage be in the church.
• 53:54
  Speaker 3: Most people are just like, that's cool. We're divorced. We're
• 53:57
  Speaker 3: going to get married on the beach now.
• 53:58
  Speaker 6: Yeah, let's get married in a garden. But no, homegirl said,
• 54:02
  Speaker 6: I need to be your only wife in the eyes
• 54:04
  Speaker 6: of God. I want to know who this girl is.
• 54:08
  Speaker 5: I'm telling you, I am looking for her.
• 54:09
  Speaker 3: I know.
• 54:10
  Speaker 4: I was kind of like, how are people like, I
• 54:12
  Speaker 4: would be bringing that up at every luncheon.
• 54:14
  Speaker 3: I would be like, what is going on?
• 54:16
  Speaker 5: Now, see, here's the thing.
• 54:17
  Speaker 3: I know they don't use everything, obviously.
• 54:19
  Speaker 7: No, no, no.
• 54:20
  Speaker 6: But also, I promise you I would have said it
• 54:22
  Speaker 6: if I had known during our filming that it was
• 54:25
  Speaker 6: her friend or a former friend.
• 54:28
  Speaker 5: I promise you I would have asked. Because that is
• 54:30
  Speaker 5: just too much not to ask about. And then it
• 54:34
  Speaker 5: was just like, wait, what?
• 54:36
  Speaker 6: I mean, the annulment was one thing, and then after
• 54:38
  Speaker 6: we got through that, I was like, okay, so now
• 54:40
  Speaker 6: you're Sutton Brown?
• 54:41
  Speaker 5: All right, I guess we'll accept it. Sure.
• 54:44
  Speaker 4: That doesn't really mean she can't call herself Sutton Stratton.
• 54:47
  Speaker 5: You don't have to.
• 54:48
  Speaker 3: Change your name.
• 54:48
  Speaker 6: I don't think she has to, but I think.
• 54:50
  Speaker 5: She's going to.
• 54:50
  Speaker 3: I mean, I got a real idea that took me
• 54:52
  Speaker 3: five times to the DMV.
• 54:53
  Speaker 4: Oh, my God. because i'm heather mcdonald tobias and i
• 54:56
  Speaker 4: had was always missing something and so i just saw
• 54:59
  Speaker 4: someone said a tweet to me because i talked about
• 55:01
  Speaker 4: it and they're like this person goes hi i'm going
• 55:03
  Speaker 4: to get my california real id i brought my mother's
• 55:05
  Speaker 4: placenta and like it was.
• 55:07
  Speaker 5: Like because it's like hilarious.
• 55:09
  Speaker 4: So i'm like i don't think anyone's gonna make her
• 55:11
  Speaker 4: legally change no one.
• 55:13
  Speaker 6: Can make you legally change your name and obviously i
• 55:15
  Speaker 6: have not talked to you about this this is just
• 55:17
  Speaker 6: conjecture on my own um But I think it would
• 55:20
  Speaker 6: be very hard for me to keep somebody's name who
• 55:23
  Speaker 6: didn't want me to have it.
• 55:25
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 55:25
  Speaker 5: You know what I'm saying? I'd be like, you went
• 55:27
  Speaker 5: through all that trouble.
• 55:28
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 55:29
  Speaker 5: Then I'm not keeping it. You know, it's kind of like.
• 55:32
  Speaker 3: Screw you. She is a personality now.
• 55:34
  Speaker 6: It's true.
• 55:34
  Speaker 4: It's like when I was married, got married, I already
• 55:38
  Speaker 4: had been on a TV show and like had an agent.
• 55:39
  Speaker 3: So I'm like, it's Heather McDonald. My husband was like,
• 55:41
  Speaker 3: whatever you want to do.
• 55:42
  Speaker 5: Right.
• 55:43
  Speaker 4: And then when I was pregnant with my son, I
• 55:46
  Speaker 4: had this weird idea that like, What if I was
• 55:48
  Speaker 4: in the emergency room or had to go to the
• 55:50
  Speaker 4: hospital with him and they were like, that's not your kid.
• 55:51
  Speaker 3: Which would never happen.
• 55:53
  Speaker 5: By the way, I thought the same.
• 55:54
  Speaker 3: So then I just added Tobias. Yeah.
• 55:57
  Speaker 4: And so then, but I had like half the credit
• 55:59
  Speaker 4: cards say Heather McDonald. The passport says Heather McDonald, but
• 56:02
  Speaker 4: the license says Heather McDonald and Tobias.
• 56:04
  Speaker 3: So it's like a big rat fuck, honestly.
• 56:07
  Speaker 6: I've been thinking a lot about this lately. So I'm fascinated.
• 56:11
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't think it's worth it to change your name.
• 56:13
  Speaker 5: Oh, that's interesting.
• 56:14
  Speaker 3: You can still be called Tobias. what's your husband's?
• 56:17
  Speaker 5: Watson.
• 56:18
  Speaker 3: You can still be the Watson's Christmas card.
• 56:20
  Speaker 5: Right.
• 56:20
  Speaker 3: You can still call yourself the Watson. So interesting. But
• 56:23
  Speaker 3: to legally go through it, I don't think it's worth it.
• 56:26
  Speaker 5: Oh, it's so fascinating.
• 56:27
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't think it's worth it.
• 56:28
  Speaker 6: It's like, girl, but then I have the complication of
• 56:31
  Speaker 6: feeling like, I haven't really made.
• 56:34
  Speaker 5: My decision yet.
• 56:34
  Speaker 3: I mean, your name is really good.
• 56:36
  Speaker 5: Yeah, it is good.
• 56:36
  Speaker 4: And I thought the same way about Heather MacDonald. I
• 56:38
  Speaker 4: was like, Heather MacDonald is a really good name.
• 56:40
  Speaker 5: Yeah. Is MacDonald your maiden name?
• 56:42
  Speaker 4: That's my maiden name. And like, but nobody, like he will,
• 56:47
  Speaker 4: no one would have cared. And I do, I'll say,
• 56:50
  Speaker 4: I'm where the Tobias is at the country club, like whatever.
• 56:53
  Speaker 4: And then, but you know, sometimes I'm like, throw the
• 56:57
  Speaker 4: McDonald around.
• 56:57
  Speaker 3: I know, like, because I'm like, it's Heather McDonald device.
• 57:00
  Speaker 5: Because people know that name.
• 57:01
  Speaker 4: Yeah, like, I don't need to get a table or something.
• 57:03
  Speaker 3: Oh, for sure.
• 57:04
  Speaker 5: Yeah, throw your weight around, girl. I love that. Absolutely.
• 57:09
  Speaker 5: I champion that idea.
• 57:11
  Speaker 3: But I think it's just, I just think it's a
• 57:13
  Speaker 3: pain in the ass. Yeah, but that's why I.
• 57:15
  Speaker 6: Was just like, you know what, if she wants to
• 57:17
  Speaker 6: change it to brown, And she don't want to be associated.
• 57:20
  Speaker 5: Her kids are grown. It's like, you might as well.
• 57:22
  Speaker 3: She looked gorgeous this season.
• 57:24
  Speaker 5: Oh, yeah.
• 57:25
  Speaker 3: Like her hair and makeup and everything.
• 57:27
  Speaker 5: She did a great job.
• 57:28
  Speaker 4: And now Amanda. Let's talk about Amanda.
• 57:31
  Speaker 9: Yes.
• 57:32
  Speaker 4: I really loved that you explained on the end of
• 57:37
  Speaker 4: the first part one of the reunion.
• 57:39
  Speaker 5: Oh, yes. About?
• 57:40
  Speaker 4: Because I kind of was like when she said, hey,
• 57:43
  Speaker 4: you're coming after me, you know, in her confession or whatever,
• 57:46
  Speaker 4: because you two had an online course. And I was like, look,
• 57:50
  Speaker 4: Oprah has an online course. There's masterclasses. There's, you know,
• 57:53
  Speaker 4: there's all this, Ron Howard.
• 57:56
  Speaker 3: There's script writing classes.
• 57:57
  Speaker 4: There's all that kind of stuff that isn't like a
• 58:00
  Speaker 4: negative thing. And I've defended her because I'm like, hey, listen,
• 58:04
  Speaker 4: she has created something.
• 58:06
  Speaker 3: It makes money and all that stuff. So I thought
• 58:09
  Speaker 3: you explained it really, really well.
• 58:13
  Speaker 4: And then when it went back to it, and saw
• 58:16
  Speaker 4: the clip, it did make sense that you were like,
• 58:19
  Speaker 4: it doesn't make money.
• 58:21
  Speaker 3: It's not a money maker.
• 58:21
  Speaker 5: It's not meant to do that.
• 58:22
  Speaker 4: It's not meant to be this big thing that people
• 58:26
  Speaker 4: buy into and continue to pay up and up and
• 58:29
  Speaker 4: up and up and then they might become a coach themselves.
• 58:31
  Speaker 5: Right, right, right.
• 58:32
  Speaker 6: But I think the thing that bothered me, because I
• 58:36
  Speaker 6: wouldn't have been bothered with her misunderstanding what I said
• 58:39
  Speaker 6: until she turned it into a negative in order to
• 58:42
  Speaker 6: compare us.
• 58:43
  Speaker 5: You know, that's what rubbed me the wrong way. Like,
• 58:45
  Speaker 5: I was just like, wait, hold on.
• 58:47
  Speaker 6: You took something I said, which I, by the way,
• 58:49
  Speaker 6: when we were in the vineyard, I thought we were
• 58:51
  Speaker 6: having a great moment because I thought, oh, here we go.
• 58:53
  Speaker 6: Here's some understanding about what you do and what I do.
• 58:56
  Speaker 6: It was actually the very first time where I was
• 58:58
  Speaker 6: just like, oh, there's a breakthrough. Like, I think I
• 59:00
  Speaker 6: better understand what you're doing and I'll tell you what
• 59:02
  Speaker 6: I'm doing, you know? But then she turned, like, after
• 59:06
  Speaker 6: we were done filming, she just turned it into like
• 59:08
  Speaker 6: this negative dig. Like to be like, oh, I'm jealous
• 59:11
  Speaker 6: of her because I'm losing business on my online courses
• 59:16
  Speaker 6: and she's a millionaire. And I was like, wait, wait, wait,
• 59:19
  Speaker 6: hold on. Why would you say that? I was like,
• 59:21
  Speaker 6: you know that we don't do the same thing. And
• 59:23
  Speaker 6: by the way, to your point, Oprah has online courses
• 59:26
  Speaker 6: and Ron Howard has online. Everybody got a goddamn online course.
• 59:30
  Speaker 6: It doesn't mean that's the center of what they do.
• 59:32
  Speaker 6: And it is the center of what she does. And
• 59:33
  Speaker 6: so I understand why that's her whole world. But for me,
• 59:36
  Speaker 6: it is not. I'm like, girl, if we were to
• 59:38
  Speaker 6: compare the list of the things I have going on
• 59:41
  Speaker 6: and have had going on compared to what I do
• 59:44
  Speaker 6: online to help other people, girl.
• 59:46
  Speaker 5: This is not even the conversation.
• 59:48
  Speaker 3: Right, this is a little thing to the... It's not.
• 59:50
  Speaker 6: And so I was bothered by the comparison because I
• 59:54
  Speaker 6: was like, we are not the same. I don't know
• 59:56
  Speaker 6: why we would be over here apples and oranges.
• 59:59
  Speaker 3: I mean, and then when, you know, and I do
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 3: think it was... I got... I see both sides when
• 1:00:03
  Speaker 3: she was like, I am.
• 1:00:06
  Speaker 4: proud that it was my millions that bought this house
• 1:00:10
  Speaker 4: i don't know if she bought it outright good for
• 1:00:12
  Speaker 4: her and you want to say that and while but
• 1:00:15
  Speaker 4: they were like yeah but that's a little bit you
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 4: know rude to your husband and and all of that
• 1:00:20
  Speaker 4: and um and i got i got i i was
• 1:00:24
  Speaker 4: so glad that then sutton said I would have been
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 4: hurt if my husband, as I'm holding a baby, said,
• 1:00:31
  Speaker 4: I bought this house. It was with my money, with
• 1:00:33
  Speaker 4: my company, and it's the same kind of thing. And then, jokingly,
• 1:00:38
  Speaker 4: I'm like, well, if your husband makes the same amount
• 1:00:43
  Speaker 4: that you make in a month, he makes in a year,
• 1:00:45
  Speaker 4: why don't you give him the.
• 1:00:46
  Speaker 3: Course for free?
• 1:00:47
  Speaker 7: No.
• 1:00:48
  Speaker 6: Why don't you manifest support?
• 1:00:51
  Speaker 5: I should have thought of that.
• 1:00:52
  Speaker 6: That is a fantastic question.
• 1:00:54
  Speaker 5: Can he have a discount?
• 1:00:55
  Speaker 6: Is there a special Mother's Day special?
• 1:00:57
  Speaker 5: You know what?
• 1:00:57
  Speaker 6: That is such a good point. It's like, why hasn't
• 1:01:00
  Speaker 6: he manifested more money? That is actually a fascinating question.
• 1:01:05
  Speaker 6: I had not thought of that.
• 1:01:08
  Speaker 5: But you know what? Here's the thing.
• 1:01:09
  Speaker 6: I thought, look, during that conversation, I really didn't say
• 1:01:11
  Speaker 6: anything because I just felt like everybody else was jumping in.
• 1:01:14
  Speaker 6: And there's enough of the like, oh, Bose versus Amanda
• 1:01:18
  Speaker 6: thing where I'm just like, first of all, everybody versus Amanda.
• 1:01:21
  Speaker 6: But OK, you know, so I was like, all right,
• 1:01:23
  Speaker 6: I'll take this one. But the point to be made
• 1:01:25
  Speaker 6: wasn't about whether or not this is like women's empowerment. OK,
• 1:01:29
  Speaker 6: I can run around saying I've made a gazillion dollars
• 1:01:32
  Speaker 6: and I can do everything I want to as well.
• 1:01:34
  Speaker 6: But I would never disparage Keely because I don't want his.
• 1:01:39
  Speaker 5: I don't I wouldn't want to disparage my partner.
• 1:01:42
  Speaker 6: You know, like for me, it wasn't so much like, oh,
• 1:01:45
  Speaker 6: do you have the money and can you prove that
• 1:01:47
  Speaker 6: like you are an independent woman? It's like, I just
• 1:01:50
  Speaker 6: wouldn't want to disparage my partner. And I just feel
• 1:01:52
  Speaker 6: like you wouldn't want that if you were a woman.
• 1:01:55
  Speaker 5: You wouldn't want that if you were a man.
• 1:01:57
  Speaker 6: So I was like, well, maybe you should think about
• 1:02:00
  Speaker 6: how he feels when you say things like that.
• 1:02:03
  Speaker 5: But she did admit that he didn't necessarily like it.
• 1:02:06
  Speaker 6: Right.
• 1:02:07
  Speaker 4: I mean, I don't think anybody would.
• 1:02:09
  Speaker 3: It is hard, even in this day and age, when
• 1:02:13
  Speaker 3: the woman is.
• 1:02:15
  Speaker 4: the main breadwinner or maybe you do the business together.
• 1:02:19
  Speaker 4: In my case, we have a business together, but I
• 1:02:21
  Speaker 4: am the face of it. You know, like I do
• 1:02:23
  Speaker 4: these things. So it's like, yeah, it's not fun. It's,
• 1:02:28
  Speaker 4: it's a hard, it's a hard thing for a couple
• 1:02:31
  Speaker 4: to manage when the woman is makes more than the man.
• 1:02:34
  Speaker 3: It's just a fact.
• 1:02:36
  Speaker 4: And certainly one way I do not think it's helpful,
• 1:02:40
  Speaker 4: which is what Erica J said.
• 1:02:42
  Speaker 3: Is saying it over and over on a real house wise. Like,
• 1:02:45
  Speaker 3: I mean, my God.
• 1:02:46
  Speaker 6: Maybe say it once. I don't, that's the problem. It's like,
• 1:02:49
  Speaker 6: you don't say it a thousand times. I just don't,
• 1:02:52
  Speaker 6: I just don't know that you do that. I mean,
• 1:02:53
  Speaker 6: I can't even imagine what the pillow talk is like.
• 1:02:55
  Speaker 4: Hey, listen, I, I can't, you know, I was able
• 1:02:58
  Speaker 4: to buy this house, you know, by my, by myself. Like,
• 1:03:03
  Speaker 4: I didn't need his money or whatever, you know, or
• 1:03:05
  Speaker 4: even someone that's like, we didn't need my parents' money
• 1:03:08
  Speaker 4: for the down payment, whatever, the same type of thing.
• 1:03:10
  Speaker 3: That's okay. And I get that she came on the show.
• 1:03:13
  Speaker 4: She was doing the Bethany Frankel way of putting skinny
• 1:03:16
  Speaker 4: girl everywhere. Yeah. You know, her manifesting business. And because
• 1:03:21
  Speaker 4: she was smart. She was probably like, listen, if this
• 1:03:23
  Speaker 4: is my one season.
• 1:03:24
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 1:03:25
  Speaker 3: I'm going to make it work.
• 1:03:27
  Speaker 4: Enough out of it you know totally and then i
• 1:03:29
  Speaker 4: also kind of felt for her when she when they
• 1:03:32
  Speaker 4: were like yeah but you told the cameraman zoom in
• 1:03:35
  Speaker 4: on this chanel backpack which is like sutton's got you
• 1:03:38
  Speaker 4: know 20 of those.
• 1:03:39
  Speaker 5: She gave to her you know.
• 1:03:41
  Speaker 4: To her gardener last week like she's like cleaning out
• 1:03:44
  Speaker 4: her closet like that's nothing but i kind of felt
• 1:03:47
  Speaker 4: she was like well i thought that was what she
• 1:03:50
  Speaker 4: was like i think in her mind Yes, but she
• 1:03:54
  Speaker 4: was also maybe being like naively helpful.
• 1:03:56
  Speaker 3: Like, oh, I do have a good bag if you
• 1:03:59
  Speaker 3: want to like.
• 1:03:59
  Speaker 5: I think you're giving her too much credit. No, no, no.
• 1:04:03
  Speaker 6: I think, I mean, but she said it, which is
• 1:04:05
  Speaker 6: that like she wanted to keep up with the Joneses
• 1:04:08
  Speaker 6: because she thought that's what the show was.
• 1:04:09
  Speaker 5: Like everybody show off what they have. The difference is nuance.
• 1:04:13
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 1:04:14
  Speaker 6: You know, and taste and tone. Because, like, of course
• 1:04:17
  Speaker 6: you want to showcase what you're wearing. We all love that. Like,
• 1:04:21
  Speaker 6: whenever we walk into seeing somebody at a dinner or whatever,
• 1:04:24
  Speaker 6: we'd be like, oh, my God, you look amazing.
• 1:04:26
  Speaker 5: How many times did we ask Jennifer, what do you
• 1:04:28
  Speaker 5: have on?
• 1:04:29
  Speaker 3: You know what I mean?
• 1:04:29
  Speaker 5: Like, of course you do that.
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 6: But it's also not Jennifer being like, look at what
• 1:04:34
  Speaker 6: I have.
• 1:04:35
  Speaker 5: On my body, and it's $ 100 million worth.
• 1:04:37
  Speaker 3: Okay, a couple more questions.
• 1:04:39
  Speaker 7: Yes.
• 1:04:39
  Speaker 4: Now, I've been watching the shows for years, and there
• 1:04:42
  Speaker 4: is that element of where someone feels that they're castmates
• 1:04:45
  Speaker 4: because it is a job, is, A, not showing up
• 1:04:48
  Speaker 4: as much. She's been, you know, Dorit's been criticized for
• 1:04:52
  Speaker 4: taking smoking breaks, which I kind of thought was interesting.
• 1:04:56
  Speaker 4: Because I remember that in my first corporate job. I
• 1:04:57
  Speaker 4: was like, should I just pretend that I'm a smoker
• 1:04:59
  Speaker 4: just to, like, go outside? Yeah, 15 minutes. But also, Erica,
• 1:05:06
  Speaker 4: you know, was, like, alluded to Dorit. Like, I shared
• 1:05:11
  Speaker 4: with you about this DV situation. And it seemed like
• 1:05:16
  Speaker 4: maybe there was a moment where Dorit's like, you better
• 1:05:18
  Speaker 4: bring that up on camera.
• 1:05:19
  Speaker 3: You better give us something.
• 1:05:22
  Speaker 4: Now, I am going to interpret it one way, in
• 1:05:25
  Speaker 4: that Dorit, I think, was being a friend because we
• 1:05:30
  Speaker 4: don't see Erica's son.
• 1:05:33
  Speaker 3: We don't see Erica's new boyfriend. We don't really see
• 1:05:38
  Speaker 3: much of her life.
• 1:05:39
  Speaker 4: If she was sharing her son and her boyfriend... we
• 1:05:42
  Speaker 4: would see the two of them meet. Wouldn't that be interesting?
• 1:05:44
  Speaker 3: I would love to have seen the cop meet G.I.
• 1:05:46
  Speaker 8: Joe.
• 1:05:47
  Speaker 5: I would love to see the cop's girlfriend.
• 1:05:49
  Speaker 3: He doesn't have to, and I'm not saying that she should.
• 1:05:51
  Speaker 3: That's her kid.
• 1:05:52
  Speaker 4: But if you had this other thing happen, we never
• 1:05:56
  Speaker 4: knew that you had this other boyfriend because we never
• 1:05:58
  Speaker 4: saw this other part of your life.
• 1:06:00
  Speaker 3: So it's like, I wonder, you share so much. We
• 1:06:02
  Speaker 3: see your daughter. We see your... I mean.
• 1:06:05
  Speaker 4: Is that something that sometimes among housewives, it's like, I
• 1:06:11
  Speaker 4: feel like I'm pulling the weight and somebody else kind
• 1:06:13
  Speaker 4: of isn't.
• 1:06:14
  Speaker 6: I think it's probably about tenure than anything. Because I
• 1:06:17
  Speaker 6: don't feel that way just because everything.
• 1:06:19
  Speaker 5: Is brand new.
• 1:06:20
  Speaker 3: You know what I mean?
• 1:06:21
  Speaker 6: And everything is a shiny penny. So I'm always looking
• 1:06:23
  Speaker 6: around like, ooh, tell me more about that. Like, I
• 1:06:26
  Speaker 6: feel like I'm in a lot of discovery. Whereas maybe
• 1:06:29
  Speaker 6: somebody like Dorit or... Kyle or anybody else, Sutton maybe,
• 1:06:34
  Speaker 6: feel like, oh, well, I have to come season after
• 1:06:37
  Speaker 6: season and tell new things and like, you know, divulge
• 1:06:41
  Speaker 6: my entire insides. Otherwise, you know, it's going to seem
• 1:06:44
  Speaker 6: as if I'm not pulling my weight. And why do
• 1:06:46
  Speaker 6: I have to do this and you don't have to?
• 1:06:48
  Speaker 6: I mean, I've heard that argument a lot. Um, I
• 1:06:51
  Speaker 6: don't necessarily feel that just cause I don't think I
• 1:06:53
  Speaker 6: have enough tenure to feel that pressure. Right.
• 1:06:55
  Speaker 5: But I'm focused on my life.
• 1:06:56
  Speaker 3: But you're saying that does kind of exist.
• 1:06:58
  Speaker 5: Yeah, that exists. Oh, for sure.
• 1:06:59
  Speaker 6: For sure it exists.
• 1:07:00
  Speaker 3: And I can see, and I can see why. And, um,
• 1:07:03
  Speaker 3: I love that.
• 1:07:04
  Speaker 4: And I loved Erica's honesty about DJing is easier than
• 1:07:08
  Speaker 4: performing and I love it.
• 1:07:10
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 1:07:10
  Speaker 8: Yeah.
• 1:07:10
  Speaker 5: She's going to DJ my wedding.
• 1:07:12
  Speaker 4: I mean, I love that too, but I was also like,
• 1:07:15
  Speaker 4: you know, maybe she wants to just be a guest. Yeah.
• 1:07:18
  Speaker 5: What, at my wedding, you mean?
• 1:07:20
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:07:20
  Speaker 5: Oh, my God. She probably does. She's probably like, why
• 1:07:23
  Speaker 5: do I got to come work?
• 1:07:24
  Speaker 3: No, this is what you should do. Have your regular DJ.
• 1:07:26
  Speaker 5: Oh, I am, I am.
• 1:07:27
  Speaker 3: And then she just comes.
• 1:07:28
  Speaker 6: She's going to do a little spotlight.
• 1:07:30
  Speaker 3: Yeah, exactly.
• 1:07:32
  Speaker 5: I don't want her to do all of that.
• 1:07:33
  Speaker 6: But I do think that, look, there are also, I
• 1:07:37
  Speaker 6: think we got to also, like, you know, be careful about, oh,
• 1:07:41
  Speaker 6: this one's sharing too much or that one's not sharing enough.
• 1:07:43
  Speaker 4: Right.
• 1:07:43
  Speaker 6: Because of tenure there's a long time and so I
• 1:07:46
  Speaker 6: don't agree when people say like oh Kyle isn't sharing
• 1:07:49
  Speaker 6: enough I'm like that girl's.
• 1:07:50
  Speaker 5: Been on the show 15 fucking.
• 1:07:51
  Speaker 6: Years I agree and she shared enough of her life
• 1:07:55
  Speaker 6: if she decides that she doesn't want to share this
• 1:07:57
  Speaker 6: particular part okay she doesn't want to say.
• 1:08:00
  Speaker 3: The person's name we.
• 1:08:01
  Speaker 4: Know who the person is and by the way we
• 1:08:04
  Speaker 4: already saw the person the previous season.
• 1:08:05
  Speaker 6: And maybe then they change their mind exactly I'm like
• 1:08:08
  Speaker 6: hey look She is allowed. And then if she decides like, hey, look,
• 1:08:12
  Speaker 6: because I'm not sharing this, I can't be on the
• 1:08:14
  Speaker 6: show anymore.
• 1:08:14
  Speaker 5: That is her call. That's her decision. Meanwhile, I'm focused
• 1:08:17
  Speaker 5: on my life.
• 1:08:18
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:08:19
  Speaker 4: And whatever that relationship is, with Morgan Wade, who just
• 1:08:23
  Speaker 4: started a podcast, is doing another TV show. She doesn't
• 1:08:25
  Speaker 4: leave a private life. She's a big musician. They might
• 1:08:28
  Speaker 4: just be friends. They might have always just been friends.
• 1:08:30
  Speaker 4: Doesn't really matter. But yeah, I think that was interesting
• 1:08:35
  Speaker 4: to watch. And I felt like I was never like,
• 1:08:40
  Speaker 4: give me more.
• 1:08:41
  Speaker 3: I was like, this is juicy. This is good. This
• 1:08:43
  Speaker 3: is interesting. Whatever it is.
• 1:08:44
  Speaker 6: I think the tension of her and Mo is so
• 1:08:47
  Speaker 6: interesting to me. I know maybe people want more. By
• 1:08:51
  Speaker 6: the way, when I met him, because of course, I
• 1:08:55
  Speaker 6: saw him at Soul House and we had talked about
• 1:08:57
  Speaker 6: him a bunch. And so, I, like I said, I
• 1:08:59
  Speaker 6: had my, I was team Kyle, right? Even though she
• 1:09:01
  Speaker 6: and I were not particularly close, but I was like, look,
• 1:09:04
  Speaker 6: it's us against him, you know?
• 1:09:06
  Speaker 5: And then I met him and I was like, yo,
• 1:09:09
  Speaker 5: this guy's got aura.
• 1:09:11
  Speaker 3: Yeah. He's really charming.
• 1:09:14
  Speaker 6: And so then I told the reader, I don't think
• 1:09:16
  Speaker 6: it made the edit, but I told the reader, I
• 1:09:17
  Speaker 6: was like, yo, if I ever meet P.K., And he
• 1:09:20
  Speaker 6: charms me.
• 1:09:20
  Speaker 5: I'm sorry. I apologize ahead of time. Because I don't know.
• 1:09:25
  Speaker 3: I'm like, Moe is kind of cool. I've met him
• 1:09:28
  Speaker 3: a bunch of times. He's always very nice.
• 1:09:30
  Speaker 5: He's great.
• 1:09:31
  Speaker 3: He's fun. I understand.
• 1:09:33
  Speaker 4: It's funny, too, to see how she, when she does now,
• 1:09:37
  Speaker 4: we see her get a visible ick sometimes.
• 1:09:40
  Speaker 3: That's kind of funny because she's like... Yeah, I know.
• 1:09:44
  Speaker 3: Now that she's kind of out of it, she still has...
• 1:09:47
  Speaker 3: like she said, they were, they were friends.
• 1:09:49
  Speaker 4: They're friendly, but it is kind of funny how she's like,
• 1:09:51
  Speaker 4: we'll roll her eyes and be like, whatever.
• 1:09:53
  Speaker 5: Well, she talks about at reunion.
• 1:09:55
  Speaker 6: She talks about this time that I think they were
• 1:09:58
  Speaker 6: in Aspen or, or something. And, um, he was, you know,
• 1:10:03
  Speaker 6: he was going around the party as if she wasn't
• 1:10:06
  Speaker 6: there and how it made her feel.
• 1:10:07
  Speaker 5: And I was like, Girl.
• 1:10:09
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I think it's a very hard thing to balance.
• 1:10:11
  Speaker 3: And be in the public eye.
• 1:10:13
  Speaker 5: And be in the public eye. And then you don't
• 1:10:14
  Speaker 5: have any clear lines of demarcation. You know what I'm saying?
• 1:10:17
  Speaker 5: Like that. Would be an impossible situation. So I don't know.
• 1:10:22
  Speaker 3: It'll be interesting. Well, I loved that you came. Thank
• 1:10:26
  Speaker 3: you so much.
• 1:10:27
  Speaker 5: I'm glad to be here.
• 1:10:28
  Speaker 3: If you're not following her, you're crazy.
• 1:10:30
  Speaker 4: So tell everybody where they can follow you and anything
• 1:10:33
  Speaker 4: they want to get from you.
• 1:10:34
  Speaker 6: I'm the badass bows on Instagram. So you can find
• 1:10:38
  Speaker 6: me everywhere with that. But mostly I live on Instagram.
• 1:10:41
  Speaker 3: And I'm so excited. We still have part two.
• 1:10:44
  Speaker 5: Yes.
• 1:10:45
  Speaker 4: Yeah, well, in this era you will have seen part
• 1:10:48
  Speaker 4: two and then we still have three.
• 1:10:49
  Speaker 5: Yeah, part three.
• 1:10:50
  Speaker 3: Thank you. Thank you so much.
• 1:10:52
  Speaker 2: Thanks.
• 1:10:53
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• 1:10:55
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• 1:10:58
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• 1:11:02
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