Latest / The Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast / Don’t F**k Around, Get A Prenup!

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Don’t F**k Around, Get A Prenup! · The Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast

• 0:22
  Speaker 1: Hey, I do part two.
• 0:23
  Speaker 2: It's your celebrity mentor, Kelly and Simone. And today I'm
• 0:26
  Speaker 2: joined by one of our favorites from bachelor nation and
• 0:30
  Speaker 2: host of the podcast, After Reality, it's Courtney Robertson.
• 0:34
  Speaker 3: Hi, Court. Hey, Kelly.
• 0:38
  Speaker 2: Today, we get to welcome back to the pod, who's
• 0:41
  Speaker 2: a wealth of information. He's a divorce attorney and huge
• 0:44
  Speaker 2: on TikTok. And today, we're going to talk all about prenups.
• 0:48
  Speaker 2: Welcome back to the pod, Dennis Vetrano. So my knowledge
• 0:52
  Speaker 2: of prenups, I'm so excited to talk to the expert.
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: I did not have a My second engagement, I asked
• 1:02
  Speaker 2: for a prenup. He declined. And so I called off
• 1:06
  Speaker 2: my wedding four days before. That's the decision of my life.
• 1:11
  Speaker 3: Smart cookie.
• 1:12
  Speaker 2: Provide, protect, and keep you safe. That's what men are
• 1:14
  Speaker 2: supposed to do.
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: That's called boundaries. And that's called insisting on them. I
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: love it.
• 1:19
  Speaker 3: Dennis, it's Courtney here. And I'm in the throes of
• 1:22
  Speaker 3: a divorce. And to my knowledge, it's cheaper to keep her.
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I think for the most part, but here's the
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: funny part about prenups these days. More and more women
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: are opting for prenups and asking for them than ever before.
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: I mean, the recent stat that I looked at was
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: like 52% of women are asking for prenups, which is
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: so foreign to me because having been in this industry
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: for 25 plus years, I'm accustomed to you know, here's
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: this uber successful guy. I, you know, gets married and says, Hey,
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: I want a prenup for all the stuff that I
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: have before we get married. And of course they don't
• 1:59
  Speaker 1: tell you, I want you to be a stay at
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: home mom. I want you to take care of the kids.
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: I want, I want, I want, I want, I want,
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: but if we split, you don't get anything.
• 2:07
  Speaker 3: Greedy, greedy. Well, I, last time I checked, I don't
• 2:10
  Speaker 3: have a prenup and I'm in the middle of a
• 2:11
  Speaker 3: divorce and I had just moved into a new house.
• 2:14
  Speaker 3: I have three little kids, everything. I've, I've done my
• 2:17
  Speaker 3: research on you, everything that you're saying I'm going through.
• 2:20
  Speaker 3: So Just to give a little context, my dad didn't
• 2:24
  Speaker 3: have a prenup. He was married for 40 years. He's
• 2:27
  Speaker 3: now remarried for seven years. And what's his is his
• 2:30
  Speaker 3: and what's hers is hers. But I don't have a prenup.
• 2:34
  Speaker 3: And I am going through a very contentious divorce currently.
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: Sorry about that, Courtney.
• 2:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah. And I was at least relatively familiar with that.
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: That is... So it's funny because if you poll people,
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: they say the four most scary things in life, top four,
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: one of which is death, right? The other of which
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: is divorce. One, you know, out of the top four
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: scariest things people want, you know, when you say, what's
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: the scariest thing? So I don't envy the situation you're in.
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: And as much as I've seen it from the outside,
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: I've never been through it myself from the inside. So, yeah.
• 3:14
  Speaker 1: you know, stay strong.
• 3:15
  Speaker 3: Then I'm also with an attorney. So I have an
• 3:18
  Speaker 3: order of protection, just shout out to that. Uh, I'm
• 3:22
  Speaker 3: going through the proper channels, but it, it is scary, uh,
• 3:27
  Speaker 3: Dennis to talk about that. It's like grief, you know,
• 3:29
  Speaker 3: the five stages of grief and also having three little kids.
• 3:33
  Speaker 3: So I'll, I'm sorry to jump in so quick, but, uh,
• 3:37
  Speaker 3: last night was the first night I didn't have the
• 3:39
  Speaker 3: kids for a week, uh, dealing with three little kids
• 3:41
  Speaker 3: on your own. Is also scary.
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: Yeah. And it's funny because there's, but listen, there's two
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: sides to that, right? So there's the scary part of
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: having them with you and managing everything because that's a lot.
• 3:55
  Speaker 1: But then even worse than that, not having them with you.
• 3:58
  Speaker 1: Because when you establish that relationship with your kids, I mean,
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: I have two of my own. It's like you go
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: through so much to raise kids well. And I say, well, okay,
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: anybody can just throw together kids and then it's not
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: as hard. But to raise kids well, it's a lot.
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: But then you establish such a bond with them that
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: when they're not around. It's funny because my brother-in-law, we
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: see each other from time to time. He has four kids.
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: And his last kid just went off to college. And
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: he said to me, Dennis, he says, I think this
• 4:26
  Speaker 1: is the high watermark in my life. Not to say
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: you don't have your own independence and your own stuff.
• 4:32
  Speaker 2: No, but it is. It is.
• 4:34
  Speaker 3: I keep saying it's so easy to get married. And
• 4:37
  Speaker 3: it's so... expensive and hard to get divorced.
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: Yep.
• 4:42
  Speaker 3: It's, it's, it's a lot. And like I said, I just,
• 4:44
  Speaker 3: I'm moving new surroundings and, um, but yeah, it's, I mean,
• 4:49
  Speaker 3: it's like the only degree they, they grant you, it's
• 4:52
  Speaker 3: like going to college, right? They, you can get married, done, easy.
• 4:56
  Speaker 3: To get unmarried, the thing that I want people to know,
• 5:00
  Speaker 3: it's really, really expensive and really hard.
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: Yep.
• 5:05
  Speaker 2: Well, it's not just hard and expensive, but actually it's
• 5:08
  Speaker 2: a basically it's a filing. And so it's not up
• 5:13
  Speaker 2: to you, your lawyer and your ex-husband. As Dennis knows,
• 5:17
  Speaker 2: it's the state that decides when and how. And so
• 5:20
  Speaker 2: you're dealing with a fourth party. And I'm sorry that
• 5:24
  Speaker 2: you're going through that. You know, it's interesting, Dennis, too,
• 5:26
  Speaker 2: because I'm such a huge fan of yours on TikTok
• 5:28
  Speaker 2: and you say so many great things. You talk about
• 5:31
  Speaker 2: prenups not being romantic. So when I tried to, you know,
• 5:36
  Speaker 2: instill my prenup, my ex would have said no. But
• 5:40
  Speaker 2: a lot of people who are getting these prenups are
• 5:42
  Speaker 2: realizing that these are just pieces of paper that really
• 5:46
  Speaker 2: aren't valid. Because once you go into the divorce process,
• 5:50
  Speaker 2: people are like, that prenup, it doesn't work. I'm not
• 5:53
  Speaker 2: giving you X. I'm not giving you Y. What are
• 5:55
  Speaker 2: your thoughts?
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: It doesn't work if you do it poorly. If you
• 6:01
  Speaker 1: do it well, it will likely work. So if you
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: walk into my office tomorrow and you say, hey, I've
• 6:06
  Speaker 1: had these assets premarital. I've earned these things. I built
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: my company. I released a record album. I published a book,
• 6:14
  Speaker 1: whatever it is. Those generally can and should stay yours
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: as part of the prenup. If you say in the
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: next breath, well, I want to say that I don't
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: have to pay child support if she has the kids
• 6:24
  Speaker 1: and I don't want to. People want to put ridiculous
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: things in prenups. And the problem is then when you
• 6:30
  Speaker 1: get to court, they just look ridiculous. So now the court,
• 6:34
  Speaker 1: and the standard varies from state to state. As best
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: I'm aware, there are some other states that basically say,
• 6:43
  Speaker 1: we're just going to do a redo when we look
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: at your prenup and see if it's fair. If it's fair,
• 6:48
  Speaker 1: according to the laws in your state, and in a
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: way that they would resolve the divorce in your state,
• 6:54
  Speaker 1: then it's upheld. And if it's not, then they just
• 6:56
  Speaker 1: revisit everything. So then to me, it can kind of
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: be somewhat worthless. But here's the point. I've never been
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: the divorce lawyer that says, let's see how we can
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: screw this person out of that. Screw this person out
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: of this. It doesn't get you anywhere. So let's put
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: it this way. Even if you did that, what do
• 7:12
  Speaker 1: you end up with on the other side? Somebody who's
• 7:15
  Speaker 1: pissed off. They feel like they've been taken advantage of.
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: And then we say, okay, good luck. Sit next to
• 7:19
  Speaker 1: each other at graduation. Go to your first communion together.
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: Watch them get married. That's never going to work. That's
• 7:26
  Speaker 1: never going to work.
• 7:27
  Speaker 3: Can I ask a question real quick, honey?
• 7:29
  Speaker 1: Yeah, sure.
• 7:30
  Speaker 3: So I'm in the divorce. My divorce is filing and
• 7:35
  Speaker 3: it's filed. It was June 19th, my son's birthday, which
• 7:38
  Speaker 3: is the national holiday. But I put a waste clause
• 7:41
  Speaker 3: in because I've been dealing with infidelity in my divorce filing. So,
• 7:46
  Speaker 3: you know, I'm in Arizona, so it's a no fault state.
• 7:49
  Speaker 3: So all the infidelity. But let's say he's been spending
• 7:52
  Speaker 3: money on girlfriends, this and that to kind of walk
• 7:55
  Speaker 3: it back a little bit. I put a waste clause
• 7:58
  Speaker 3: in my divorce filing. Can you speak to that a
• 8:00
  Speaker 3: little bit? Like what we earn during, you know, I
• 8:03
  Speaker 3: have the podcast, this, that, the other thing, just to
• 8:06
  Speaker 3: kind of run it back a little bit.
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: Recoup that for sure. Okay. Recoup that for sure. And,
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: and again, you know, one of the more contentious divorces
• 8:14
  Speaker 1: I had Westchester County, which is one of the bigger,
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: one of the higher income areas, one of the bigger
• 8:18
  Speaker 1: areas in our, uh, in my locale, um, Yeah, there
• 8:22
  Speaker 1: was lingerie for the girlfriend. There were chips.
• 8:25
  Speaker 3: Was it good lingerie or tacky shit?
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: Oh, good God.
• 8:29
  Speaker 3: Who knows?
• 8:30
  Speaker 2: Who knows?
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: I mean, listen, from this fellow's behavior, I mean, he
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: was kind of like, you know, and then come home
• 8:36
  Speaker 1: to the wife and want to kind of have the
• 8:38
  Speaker 1: cake and eat it too sort of thing.
• 8:39
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that's what I'm dealing with.
• 8:41
  Speaker 2: So, Dennis, do these clauses like infidelity clauses, waste clauses,
• 8:45
  Speaker 2: do they actually hold up in court?
• 8:48
  Speaker 1: I think so. It really just depends on your particular state.
• 8:51
  Speaker 1: And in my mind, if it's me, if you come
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: into my office and you're saying like, hey, I want
• 8:55
  Speaker 1: to try to uphold this, I usually suggest no. I
• 8:58
  Speaker 1: usually suggest those are very difficult. Those are very difficult
• 9:02
  Speaker 1: to uphold, you know, at least in New York State
• 9:05
  Speaker 1: because they're going to look very foreign to the judges.
• 9:07
  Speaker 1: We do mostly vanilla prenups. And I prefer to do
• 9:12
  Speaker 1: vanilla nuts and bolts prenups. I don't want to start
• 9:15
  Speaker 1: putting these fringe terms into it because then you know what?
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: Now it's subjected to being questioned and motion practice and
• 9:22
  Speaker 1: possibly hearings on it. And what does that do? It
• 9:24
  Speaker 1: costs you money. Do I want to charge you more
• 9:27
  Speaker 1: money after the prenup or less? The point of the
• 9:30
  Speaker 1: prenup is to save you money. It's not to get
• 9:33
  Speaker 1: charged money. So I'm like, look, if you're worried about
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: this person cheating on you, you have much larger issues
• 9:41
  Speaker 1: to really... analyze.
• 9:44
  Speaker 2: Bigger fish to fry.
• 9:45
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly.
• 9:47
  Speaker 2: So speaking of these prenups and let's bring in postnups
• 9:50
  Speaker 2: as well, should they be updated? And if so, how frequently?
• 9:55
  Speaker 1: They can be updated, but what you want to do
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: with a prenup is you want to keep it as
• 10:03
  Speaker 1: broad as you can. So it will cover the future. Now,
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: if things change during the marriage, I mean, postnups are
• 10:09
  Speaker 1: more difficult to uphold than prenups because prenups is before
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: you get married, you're kind of protecting things. Now, once
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: you start asking people for things to negotiate things they've
• 10:20
  Speaker 1: acquired during the marriage, you're kind of flying in the
• 10:23
  Speaker 1: face of the standard under the law. Because technically in
• 10:26
  Speaker 1: New York State, once you get married, everything you're earning,
• 10:29
  Speaker 1: everything you're building is generally together unless your prenup says
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: something otherwise. So what I prefer to do is the
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: way our prenup is crafted, it's crafted in a situation
• 10:38
  Speaker 1: that basically says your separate stuff that you had prior
• 10:40
  Speaker 1: to the marriage is separate. And if the two of
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: you say, hey, I decide... whatever I make under my
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: name in terms of building, et cetera, is mine. So, okay,
• 10:50
  Speaker 1: I have a software company and I invent something during
• 10:53
  Speaker 1: the marriage that I've done solely exclusively in and of myself.
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: I want that to stay mine and mine alone. I mean,
• 11:00
  Speaker 1: those generally can and should be upheld. But if it's
• 11:04
  Speaker 1: like we worked together and we bought a house and
• 11:06
  Speaker 1: now I want to say like who split, sometimes those
• 11:09
  Speaker 1: are difficult. The post-nups, I suggest when marriages are on
• 11:14
  Speaker 1: the rocks, And you're trying counseling and it's just not working.
• 11:17
  Speaker 1: You're not quite sure where it's going to go. While
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: you're still relatively level-headed and you're not mired in the
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: midst of litigation, try to reach an agreement. I love that.
• 11:28
  Speaker 1: Try to be fair and do a post-nup. I mean,
• 11:31
  Speaker 1: I suggest, look, either get out or both jump in
• 11:35
  Speaker 1: with both feet to counseling and try to work through it.
• 11:37
  Speaker 2: I also love on TikTok how you talk about mediation.
• 11:40
  Speaker 2: And that's how I, my ex-husband and I, we got divorced.
• 11:44
  Speaker 2: You know, he was a high profile person in the
• 11:45
  Speaker 2: fashion industry. I was a high profile person in the
• 11:48
  Speaker 2: fashion industry. And it just, my best friend was like,
• 11:52
  Speaker 2: he literally drove up to my house. He's like, this
• 11:54
  Speaker 2: is how you're going to get divorced. You're going to
• 11:56
  Speaker 2: have a mediator, your accountant, his accountant. You guys are
• 11:59
  Speaker 2: going to tie a bow on it. We're going to
• 12:01
  Speaker 2: put it in the press, one line in the press,
• 12:03
  Speaker 2: and it's going to be over. And it was the smartest,
• 12:06
  Speaker 2: smartest thing. The only thing that I regret, like obviously
• 12:10
  Speaker 2: the post-nup, the pre-nup was the smart thing for me
• 12:14
  Speaker 2: to do with my last relationship. What I didn't like
• 12:17
  Speaker 2: is I didn't like all the press around it. And
• 12:20
  Speaker 2: I was very concerned, the daughter of a lawyer, very
• 12:24
  Speaker 2: concerned that people were going to perceive me as this
• 12:27
  Speaker 2: hard woman that gets the prenup. And I'm not a
• 12:31
  Speaker 2: hard woman. I'm just a mother protecting my nest.
• 12:35
  Speaker 3: Mama bear. I'm a mama bear too. Kelly, I love you.
• 12:40
  Speaker 3: And I'm going to take your energy, but- I think
• 12:43
  Speaker 3: that the next question should be, how should you approach
• 12:46
  Speaker 3: having someone sign a prenup or a postnup? And also,
• 12:49
  Speaker 3: you're in the public eye as well. But Dennis, how
• 12:54
  Speaker 3: should you approach having someone sign a prenup that's being
• 12:57
  Speaker 3: resistant to the idea?
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: Well, let's put it this way. Let's start with being
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: concerned or not about being in the public eye. Yes,
• 13:05
  Speaker 1: it's a very real thing. And for many people, your
• 13:07
  Speaker 1: livelihood depends on your public image. How many? Ever.
• 13:13
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 13:13
  Speaker 1: However, you've got to protect yourself and protect your kids
• 13:20
  Speaker 1: and protect the things you've worked so hard for. So
• 13:22
  Speaker 1: for the successful ladies out there, especially and even just
• 13:26
  Speaker 1: I have a lot of young professionals that they're banking
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: on themselves. They're like, I know what my brand is
• 13:30
  Speaker 1: and I know what it's going to be. And I
• 13:32
  Speaker 1: don't want a chance if this doesn't work that I
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: lose everything.
• 13:35
  Speaker 2: So it's interesting that you say that because I work
• 13:38
  Speaker 2: in high-end real estate. And so I work in the
• 13:40
  Speaker 2: transaction business in my other life. And I was afraid
• 13:45
  Speaker 2: when I asked him to sign the prenup and then
• 13:48
  Speaker 2: I called the wedding off and the press was going.
• 13:50
  Speaker 2: And I was like, oh my God, the press is
• 13:52
  Speaker 2: going to come after me and say that I'm all
• 13:54
  Speaker 2: these things. And which was interesting is that my clients
• 13:58
  Speaker 2: were like, that is so buttoned up. You were so amazing.
• 14:01
  Speaker 2: The press and the public were very, very, very welcoming.
• 14:05
  Speaker 2: I mean, this podcast really started because of my situation,
• 14:09
  Speaker 2: which is so unbelievable. Good to talk to people like Courtney.
• 14:12
  Speaker 3: They make money. The press, everybody has a job to do, right?
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 14:16
  Speaker 2: But I'm just, my point, my point is, is that I,
• 14:19
  Speaker 2: it could have gone the other way. It could have
• 14:23
  Speaker 2: been a way where it's like Kelly's a monster, all
• 14:25
  Speaker 2: these things. But it was the opposite where we have
• 14:27
  Speaker 2: this new podcast. We're learning all this information. We're bonding
• 14:31
  Speaker 2: together as a community. How do we help other people
• 14:36
  Speaker 2: so that they are not in a situation like ours?
• 14:39
  Speaker 2: And so I was just very, very, very so happy
• 14:42
  Speaker 2: about it. But it was interesting because some people in
• 14:46
  Speaker 2: the real estate industry were like, oh, this is going
• 14:48
  Speaker 2: to hurt your business. I was like, no, no, no.
• 14:51
  Speaker 2: they love it because I'm locked up. They love it
• 14:54
  Speaker 2: that I'm like very professional with my personal life and
• 14:57
  Speaker 2: my professional life. And it was like, it literally pivoted
• 15:01
  Speaker 2: me in even a bigger direction for work.
• 15:03
  Speaker 3: But that's a lot of weight on your shoulders to carry.
• 15:07
  Speaker 2: You think?
• 15:07
  Speaker 3: I mean, I mean, look at those little frail shoulders.
• 15:10
  Speaker 3: Like I have, you know, I just got back from Sedona.
• 15:13
  Speaker 3: I've been healing and Dennis, you can hop in whenever,
• 15:17
  Speaker 3: but that's a lot to carry mentally. Like I think,
• 15:20
  Speaker 3: and what I saw on you, Dennis, it's like the
• 15:23
  Speaker 3: woman tends to be the she fault parent. Right. Um,
• 15:27
  Speaker 3: and that's just how it goes. Like I'm moving, I'm
• 15:30
  Speaker 3: filing for divorce. I'm leaving the husband. Who's a narc,
• 15:33
  Speaker 3: a narcissist. Like, So you're dealing with the public media
• 15:37
  Speaker 3: stuff and you can't carry all of that. At some
• 15:40
  Speaker 3: point you will break. Right.
• 15:43
  Speaker 1: But here's the thing. Guys have been doing that for decades,
• 15:47
  Speaker 1: hundreds of years without any backlash. Right. So now here's
• 15:53
  Speaker 1: what I say. So you need a support system when
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: you go through your divorce process. And anything associated with
• 16:01
  Speaker 1: a breakup, a prenup, whatever it is, you should have
• 16:04
  Speaker 1: a support system. And if you're in a position where
• 16:06
  Speaker 1: you're a high profile person, you got to have a
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: PR person there getting their arms around this thing because
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: there is nothing easier, in my opinion, or more compelling
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: than female empowerment of all of your success and say, hey,
• 16:23
  Speaker 1: Things guys have been doing for decades. Things guys have
• 16:26
  Speaker 1: been doing for hundreds of years. Now, just like 51%, 52%
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: of women are now asking for prenups. There's no shame.
• 16:34
  Speaker 1: There's no embarrassment. There's nothing to explain. If everything you've
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: worked so hard for, including your family and your kids,
• 16:42
  Speaker 1: you're stepping up and protecting. And you've got control of
• 16:45
  Speaker 1: your situation and you're dealing with it. There's no reason.
• 16:47
  Speaker 1: In my opinion, there's no more compelling story than that.
• 17:00
  Speaker 2: I love that you're dispelling the stigma by 52% and
• 17:03
  Speaker 2: saying that women are now making these great decisions. And
• 17:07
  Speaker 2: I love that so much. Just because you get a
• 17:11
  Speaker 2: prenup doesn't mean you're not a beautiful woman. You get
• 17:14
  Speaker 2: a prenup because you're protecting your family legacy.
• 17:17
  Speaker 3: Well, I hear you talking about core values and I'm
• 17:20
  Speaker 3: still in the throes of it. And Like for me, like,
• 17:24
  Speaker 3: you know, my husband isn't in the tech world. We
• 17:26
  Speaker 3: don't have a lot of assets, but I am curious.
• 17:29
  Speaker 3: The house is our only asset. So he's going to either,
• 17:32
  Speaker 3: I either have to buy him out to walk it back.
• 17:35
  Speaker 3: You know, Kelly, sorry. You know, I'm going through it,
• 17:39
  Speaker 3: but that's our main asset is the house. I'm on it.
• 17:42
  Speaker 3: And I would like to ask that, you know, either
• 17:46
  Speaker 3: he's going to have to buy me out or I'm
• 17:47
  Speaker 3: going to have to buy him out. I don't want
• 17:49
  Speaker 3: to live there anymore because there's too many ghosts. I've
• 17:51
  Speaker 3: just moved, like I said. Dennis, if you could speak
• 17:54
  Speaker 3: to that for somebody who, you know, might be going
• 17:57
  Speaker 3: through it on a smaller scale.
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: Yeah. I mean, I think, listen, we handle multi, multi,
• 18:03
  Speaker 1: multimillion dollar asset divorces. And we also handle just general
• 18:08
  Speaker 1: two wage earners. You know, mom's a teacher. Dad works
• 18:12
  Speaker 1: for IBM. Like they have a couple of, you know,
• 18:15
  Speaker 1: pension plans, retirements and a house. We deal with hundreds
• 18:18
  Speaker 1: of those, if not thousands.
• 18:20
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 18:20
  Speaker 1: Yeah. As you go through these processes, and I'll share
• 18:23
  Speaker 1: with you another story. I never felt worse about myself
• 18:28
  Speaker 1: than when I applied for my first mortgage. This is
• 18:32
  Speaker 1: many years ago, right? And this is my wife had
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: already been very successful at that point, right? I was
• 18:37
  Speaker 1: a lawyer. I was very successful, but I didn't really
• 18:39
  Speaker 1: have my finances in order. Mortgage broker looks at me.
• 18:42
  Speaker 1: He's like, you got too much debt. You don't make
• 18:45
  Speaker 1: enough money. You're like, give me the house.
• 18:49
  Speaker 3: I'm buying a house.
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: But listen. That experience allowed me to build on something
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: that got me to where I am. So the reality,
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: the harsh reality of going... Because most people don't do
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: a net worth statement until they go through a divorce process.
• 19:07
  Speaker 1: The harsh reality of looking at that net worth statement
• 19:11
  Speaker 1: and saying, hey, I need to make more money. Hey,
• 19:13
  Speaker 1: and that is a motivating factor. That knowledge... And that
• 19:18
  Speaker 1: experience is power moving forward. You can't look at it like,
• 19:22
  Speaker 1: oh my God, I'm terrible.
• 19:24
  Speaker 3: Knowledge is power.
• 19:27
  Speaker 1: It is a starting point. It's not an end. So
• 19:30
  Speaker 1: when we talk about the cases where, yes, maybe all
• 19:33
  Speaker 1: there is to divide is a house. But then what
• 19:35
  Speaker 1: I say to you is, why in the hell are
• 19:39
  Speaker 1: we going back and forth with two lawyers to the
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: tune of tens of thousands of dollars to say, so
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: I'll give you a perfect example. I'm your lawyer, Courtney. Courtney,
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: your husband wants to know if he can pick up
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: the children at 4.30. No, no, I can't. I can
• 19:55
  Speaker 1: only do 4.15. Okay, now I charge you for that
• 19:57
  Speaker 1: phone conversation.
• 19:58
  Speaker 3: He changed the locks on me the other day and
• 20:01
  Speaker 3: I have the order of protection so I can't get
• 20:03
  Speaker 3: my personal belongings.
• 20:04
  Speaker 1: But there's going to be 25 phone calls over every little...
• 20:09
  Speaker 1: 15 minute increments.
• 20:14
  Speaker 2: Right. Right.
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: So, so what I say to clients is I tell
• 20:19
  Speaker 1: them and I think, you know, and, and, and what
• 20:20
  Speaker 1: pains me in the case is where there isn't a
• 20:22
  Speaker 1: whole lot to really fight over. And yet my client
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: says to me, I don't care, Dennis, this is going
• 20:28
  Speaker 1: to be contentious. It's going to be a knockdown drag out.
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: I'd say, average divorce lawyer per side in New York
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: state is 20 to like.
• 20:36
  Speaker 2: $ 50, 000.
• 20:36
  Speaker 1: Like, what are you going to, where is that money
• 20:39
  Speaker 1: coming from?
• 20:40
  Speaker 3: Dennis, you're going to make me cry.
• 20:42
  Speaker 1: Yeah. But you know what? You will get through the process.
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: You will be better on the other side. You just
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: have to stay patient and keep your team, your support
• 20:55
  Speaker 1: team close to help you through it. Hmm.
• 20:58
  Speaker 2: You know, what was interesting is that, you know, people
• 21:00
  Speaker 2: think that after I called off my wedding, that my
• 21:04
  Speaker 2: life was just going to be like, you know, it's like, oh,
• 21:06
  Speaker 2: Kelly's so rich. Everything's so great. Well, my taxes weren't
• 21:10
  Speaker 2: filed correctly. So after I called off my wedding, there
• 21:17
  Speaker 2: was like crazy amount of taxes that hadn't been allocated
• 21:22
  Speaker 2: for or organized. So not only did I feel like
• 21:25
  Speaker 2: absolute shit, even though I was protecting myself, then I
• 21:30
  Speaker 2: had to, then I was like in a financial situation.
• 21:33
  Speaker 2: So I'm like, let me get this straight. So I
• 21:35
  Speaker 2: do the right thing. And now I'm getting slammed with
• 21:38
  Speaker 2: a big tax bill. Like, how does this math work?
• 21:41
  Speaker 2: Like how, you know, so everybody caught my, my, the
• 21:44
  Speaker 2: reason I'm bringing this up is not because it's a
• 21:46
  Speaker 2: pity party for me, but to tell you that you're
• 21:48
  Speaker 2: not alone and there's there, you're going to have these
• 21:51
  Speaker 2: emotions and you're going to go through these things. And,
• 21:53
  Speaker 2: you know, financial trauma is, you know, it's not, it's your,
• 21:57
  Speaker 2: it's a constant. You're like, how am I supposed to
• 21:59
  Speaker 2: do this? How am I supposed to say that again, please?
• 22:01
  Speaker 1: You're not alone.
• 22:03
  Speaker 2: You're not, you're.
• 22:04
  Speaker 1: Not alone for people who are listening and tuning in.
• 22:07
  Speaker 1: You are not alone. There are hundreds of thousands of
• 22:10
  Speaker 1: people in the same boat that you're in and you
• 22:13
  Speaker 1: will get through it. You will see the other side.
• 22:15
  Speaker 1: Just keep your eye on the horizon. Block out the noise.
• 22:18
  Speaker 3: Kelly, you're the talent, Kelly, by the way. I don't
• 22:21
  Speaker 3: do well with paperwork. I was married, hopefully soon, to
• 22:25
  Speaker 3: be ex, who's an attorney who's also intimidated me with
• 22:29
  Speaker 3: the law. I'm surrounded by attorneys. But you talk about
• 22:35
  Speaker 3: how scary it is going through that. But Kelly, you're
• 22:38
  Speaker 3: a talent, and so am I. I've always had people
• 22:41
  Speaker 3: helping me. I modeled for 15 years with paperwork and documents.
• 22:45
  Speaker 3: That alone is scary. I have a stack of paperwork
• 22:48
  Speaker 3: that's filing up right now because I'm going to get
• 22:51
  Speaker 3: spousal maintenance. I'm going to get child support. And I
• 22:54
  Speaker 3: have to fill out this document. So when you talk
• 22:57
  Speaker 3: about your taxes, I mean, talk about Uncle Sam. It's stressful.
• 23:01
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah.
• 23:03
  Speaker 2: Right, but people just think it's like, people think that
• 23:05
  Speaker 2: in our industry, if you do something that's bright, that
• 23:08
  Speaker 2: everything else is just so great. Well, to your point,
• 23:11
  Speaker 2: there's all this back a house that just kind of
• 23:15
  Speaker 2: can be really, really devastating. Okay, I need to ask
• 23:18
  Speaker 2: this question because this is a big, big, big question, Dennis.
• 23:23
  Speaker 2: Pet co-parenting.
• 23:26
  Speaker 1: Oh.
• 23:27
  Speaker 2: What can a pet clause help with after divorce? Because
• 23:33
  Speaker 2: people are not having children as much, but they are
• 23:36
  Speaker 2: having a lot of pets, raising pets.
• 23:40
  Speaker 1: The problem with pet clauses is that the way New
• 23:44
  Speaker 1: York State views it now, it's almost like custody for children.
• 23:49
  Speaker 1: So in the same way, theoretically, that custody for children
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: could be a battle, whether you have terms about it
• 23:55
  Speaker 1: in the prenup or not, because the situation is constantly changing.
• 23:59
  Speaker 1: Not as much with pets as they are with kids.
• 24:02
  Speaker 1: Because kids' circumstances changes, age, school, et cetera. But I think, look,
• 24:07
  Speaker 1: I think if you're doing a prenup, put it in there.
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: Put it in there. Because minimally, even if it's not
• 24:13
  Speaker 1: entirely enforceable, the judge will get the flavor for or
• 24:17
  Speaker 1: the spirit of what the two of you had already
• 24:21
  Speaker 1: contractually previously agreed to. So you can't say when you
• 24:27
  Speaker 1: come into court, well, they never had a relationship with
• 24:30
  Speaker 1: the pet. They didn't want anything to do with the pet. No,
• 24:32
  Speaker 1: it's in the damn prenup. We negotiated for it.
• 24:34
  Speaker 3: I just grabbed my cat the other day. It's my cat.
• 24:37
  Speaker 3: I've had him for 10 years. So Kelly.
• 24:39
  Speaker 2: I just feel like, you know, children, pets, it's just
• 24:43
  Speaker 2: like another tether for either the fake female or the male,
• 24:47
  Speaker 2: whoever is the one that is, you know, has more
• 24:51
  Speaker 2: animosity because there's always, there's, you know, there's always one.
• 24:55
  Speaker 2: who takes things differently and they use it.
• 24:57
  Speaker 1: It's a tool. And I don't mean that in a
• 24:59
  Speaker 1: positive sense. No. It's a tool for them to put this.
• 25:03
  Speaker 1: I have one going on, you know, right now. And
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: I've had tons of them where they use the pet
• 25:09
  Speaker 1: as a lever, as a tool to get at your emotions.
• 25:13
  Speaker 1: They don't give a shit about the pet. They never have.
• 25:15
  Speaker 1: They don't care.
• 25:16
  Speaker 2: You wanted to go on a vacation. Well, you have
• 25:18
  Speaker 2: to pick up the cat or dog at 7 a.m.
• 25:20
  Speaker 2: You can't go on the vacation.
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: Right, right. And the problem for me, is that those
• 25:26
  Speaker 1: cases tend to, many times, not always, they tend to
• 25:30
  Speaker 1: also be the cases where the only asset is a
• 25:33
  Speaker 1: house or you're not multimillionaires, you're making decent living, you're
• 25:38
  Speaker 1: doing really well, successful, but you don't have 50,000 a side,
• 25:43
  Speaker 1: 100,000 a side to fight over the pet. And what
• 25:46
  Speaker 1: pains me about it is I have to say, I
• 25:48
  Speaker 1: get it. But you got to take away the things.
• 25:54
  Speaker 1: You got to take away as many things as you
• 25:56
  Speaker 1: can from the other side that they're using as tool
• 25:58
  Speaker 1: to get at you with. You got to take those
• 26:00
  Speaker 1: things away.
• 26:01
  Speaker 3: How do you do that in writing? I mean, I
• 26:04
  Speaker 3: grabbed my cat the other day. I mean, so can
• 26:06
  Speaker 3: we dig a little deeper there? Like, how do you
• 26:09
  Speaker 3: take those tools away? It's in the prenup or what
• 26:13
  Speaker 3: if you don't have a prenup? Because I just grabbed
• 26:15
  Speaker 3: my cat the other day and I've had the cat
• 26:18
  Speaker 3: for 10 years.
• 26:19
  Speaker 1: So I think I think if You had it prior
• 26:22
  Speaker 1: to the marriage?
• 26:23
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 26:24
  Speaker 1: Okay. So that's not as much of an issue. If
• 26:28
  Speaker 1: it was something you acquired during the marriage, technically, you know,
• 26:32
  Speaker 1: a little bit different.
• 26:33
  Speaker 3: Pets mean a lot. They're like kids to some people.
• 26:37
  Speaker 2: It is.
• 26:38
  Speaker 1: And it's very easy if you say, hey, it's the
• 26:41
  Speaker 1: 40th anniversary Corvette that, you know, that she really loves.
• 26:45
  Speaker 1: And like, I'm just going to like hang and hold
• 26:47
  Speaker 1: it over her head and like try to get at
• 26:49
  Speaker 1: her with it. That's fine. Cause then I just say,
• 26:51
  Speaker 1: let go of the car. Who cares? Whatever it's worth,
• 26:54
  Speaker 1: let him have it. But when it's a pet or
• 26:56
  Speaker 1: it's kids and you can't do it with kids clearly.
• 26:59
  Speaker 1: And now you really can't do it with pets either.
• 27:01
  Speaker 1: I mean, listen, I have three German shepherds and two
• 27:04
  Speaker 1: horses and a bunch of chickens. So we have a
• 27:09
  Speaker 1: little bit of a hobby farm at the house. So, um,
• 27:12
  Speaker 1: so I couldn't imagine not having the pets around.
• 27:17
  Speaker 3: Do you have any amazing divorce stories where you've had
• 27:19
  Speaker 3: to tell somebody, like, you got to lose the Corvette?
• 27:22
  Speaker 3: Because that's also interesting to me. Like, how do those
• 27:27
  Speaker 3: conversations go? Like, how do you let somebody down gently? Like,
• 27:30
  Speaker 3: you don't get the chickens. You don't get the Corvette.
• 27:33
  Speaker 3: I mean, I would love to hear a little dialogue
• 27:34
  Speaker 3: on that.
• 27:36
  Speaker 1: I really don't do it, to be honest. I really
• 27:37
  Speaker 1: don't let people down gently. I don't because that's not
• 27:40
  Speaker 1: what you pay me for. You pay me for it.
• 27:44
  Speaker 1: And I've used this quote 100 times, I think, on
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: the last show as well. I tell you what you
• 27:49
  Speaker 1: need to hear and not what you want to hear. Right.
• 27:52
  Speaker 1: Because if I tell you what you want to hear,
• 27:55
  Speaker 1: I'm going to say, oh, we're going to do this.
• 27:57
  Speaker 1: So many lawyers do that. Even when the, even in
• 27:59
  Speaker 1: the initial consultation, we're going to get this. We're going to,
• 28:02
  Speaker 1: I remember overhearing consultation we did a little while ago.
• 28:05
  Speaker 1: And the other side says to, or the prospective client
• 28:08
  Speaker 1: says to our lawyer, I just want to make sure
• 28:10
  Speaker 1: we do this and that to stick it to him.
• 28:13
  Speaker 2: Oh, wow.
• 28:14
  Speaker 1: Not what we do. Not what we do. Because here's
• 28:17
  Speaker 1: what happens. If I do that, let's say I'm unscrupulous
• 28:22
  Speaker 1: and I don't care and I just want to make money.
• 28:23
  Speaker 1: Let's just say that's who I am, but I'm not.
• 28:26
  Speaker 1: Then I take money from you. I fight him or her.
• 28:30
  Speaker 1: Then I ask you for more money to fight him
• 28:32
  Speaker 1: or her. Then I ask you for more money to
• 28:34
  Speaker 1: fight him or her. And then at the end of
• 28:37
  Speaker 1: the day, we don't get what you're looking for because
• 28:39
  Speaker 1: it was ridiculous from the start. And the judge saw
• 28:41
  Speaker 1: through You just trying to stick it to the other side.
• 28:44
  Speaker 1: Now I've spent $ 100, 000 of your money litigating for something
• 28:48
  Speaker 1: you didn't accomplish. And guess who they want to stick
• 28:51
  Speaker 1: it to now?
• 28:53
  Speaker 2: You, the messenger always gets killed.
• 28:56
  Speaker 3: Don't shoot the messenger. And also I think like, cause
• 28:59
  Speaker 3: I'm dealing with an attorney, there's a code of ethics
• 29:02
  Speaker 3: and you have a good, you're a good human being
• 29:04
  Speaker 3: and you're a good man, but I would love to hear.
• 29:07
  Speaker 3: So you, you don't, you, you let them, you just
• 29:10
  Speaker 3: tell them how it is.
• 29:11
  Speaker 1: I just don't. Sometimes they go and find another lawyer.
• 29:13
  Speaker 1: That's okay. It's so funny because people ask, well, do
• 29:17
  Speaker 1: you ever represent narcissists? You know, people who are just
• 29:21
  Speaker 1: out to get the other side.
• 29:22
  Speaker 3: I said, Yeah.
• 29:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I do. I take them as I find them.
• 29:26
  Speaker 1: But my job is to try to translate what you want,
• 29:30
  Speaker 1: what you're seeking to accomplish in a way that's going
• 29:33
  Speaker 1: to be palatable or understandable to the judge. Right. But
• 29:37
  Speaker 1: if you're coming up with something that's ridiculous, I'm. just
• 29:40
  Speaker 1: not going to do that. And I'll say, look, here's
• 29:44
  Speaker 1: what's fair in this case. Here's what we're going to
• 29:45
  Speaker 1: try to accomplish. Because I think with resolutions in divorce cases,
• 29:49
  Speaker 1: the small things are everything. So the little nuances in
• 29:53
  Speaker 1: your custody or your assets make a huge difference over time.
• 29:57
  Speaker 2: Dennis, when I was winding down from trying to get
• 30:03
  Speaker 2: the prenup organized, I was with Marilyn Chintz, who was
• 30:05
  Speaker 2: my lawyer. And I'll never forget walking into her office.
• 30:10
  Speaker 2: And I was so nervous. My hands were clammy. And
• 30:13
  Speaker 2: I sat down and I just started bawling my eyes out.
• 30:17
  Speaker 2: I was like, Marilyn, why can I not meet a
• 30:21
  Speaker 2: man who wants to protect me? What is going on?
• 30:27
  Speaker 2: That's what I came in with. Not like I'm such
• 30:29
  Speaker 2: a baller. I'm going to do this. I'm on housewives.
• 30:33
  Speaker 2: I was like, what is wrong with me? And I
• 30:37
  Speaker 2: think a lot of women feel like that as well.
• 30:40
  Speaker 2: They're like, women feel like that. They're like, why don't
• 30:46
  Speaker 2: they love me enough to protect me? And I think
• 30:50
  Speaker 2: that that's a very common thing. And when I told
• 30:53
  Speaker 2: a friend of mine that I was crying, She's like,
• 30:55
  Speaker 2: why would you be crying? I'm like, because I'm just
• 30:58
  Speaker 2: so disappointed in myself, in him. There's a lot of
• 31:02
  Speaker 2: shame and embarrassment. Yes. I was so embarrassed. I mean, Courtney,
• 31:07
  Speaker 2: I was humiliated, even though it was the right thing
• 31:11
  Speaker 2: to do. The good news is that he's not my lobster.
• 31:14
  Speaker 2: I'm going to find my lobster. He's going to come.
• 31:17
  Speaker 2: He's on his way. I know he's on his way
• 31:19
  Speaker 2: because I feel finally after... you know, my ex-husband who
• 31:23
  Speaker 2: is so much older than me cheating on me. And
• 31:25
  Speaker 2: then this guy not wanting to do a prenup. Like
• 31:28
  Speaker 2: I am now, like I feel so good about myself.
• 31:31
  Speaker 2: So I'm not going to cry in a lawyer's office anymore.
• 31:34
  Speaker 2: I am going to embrace my new future.
• 31:36
  Speaker 1: Yay!
• 31:39
  Speaker 3: I'm going to come with you.
• 31:40
  Speaker 2: With my new mystery human, whoever that is.
• 31:44
  Speaker 3: You don't need somebody. You got yourself. And I keep
• 31:47
  Speaker 3: telling everybody that, like the freedom and taking your power
• 31:51
  Speaker 3: back is what we're doing here today and helping people.
• 31:55
  Speaker 3: And Dennis and Kelly, thank you. It's scary. You cry.
• 32:00
  Speaker 3: It's the five stages of grief. Right now, I'm obviously
• 32:03
  Speaker 3: in the mad phase today.
• 32:06
  Speaker 2: But you got your cat back.
• 32:08
  Speaker 3: I got my cat. I got him. Smokey Robertson.
• 32:10
  Speaker 1: Smokey Robertson.
• 32:11
  Speaker 3: That's great.
• 32:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 32:23
  Speaker 3: Okay.
• 32:23
  Speaker 1: Last and final questions.
• 32:25
  Speaker 2: What are the things you see people freak out over
• 32:28
  Speaker 2: when it comes to prenups?
• 32:30
  Speaker 1: I think the biggest things they freak out about is
• 32:34
  Speaker 1: figuring out how they're going to discuss initially having a
• 32:39
  Speaker 1: prenup and the fact that the other person needs to
• 32:43
  Speaker 1: be part of the plan. I mean, I think the
• 32:46
  Speaker 1: problem with a lot of the, you know, I hate
• 32:49
  Speaker 1: to sound like it's sexist, but a lot of the
• 32:51
  Speaker 1: guys that I've dealt with that are uber successful and
• 32:54
  Speaker 1: maybe are marrying somebody substantially younger than them. And like,
• 32:57
  Speaker 1: you could, you can just see the control sort of
• 33:00
  Speaker 1: like there. Um, but they're like, you know, the reality is,
• 33:04
  Speaker 1: but wait a sec, but you said that you, they're
• 33:07
  Speaker 1: going to be a stay at home mom and you're
• 33:09
  Speaker 1: going to take care of this. And that, well, I
• 33:11
  Speaker 1: have to give, well, this could be overturned. Like I,
• 33:14
  Speaker 1: I can't say I won't have to pay child support
• 33:16
  Speaker 1: and I won't have to pay maintenance. Like, no, like,
• 33:20
  Speaker 1: you know, and I think, listen, the, one of the
• 33:23
  Speaker 1: biggest problems we have with prenups is that people don't
• 33:29
  Speaker 1: know how to approach that conversation. Um, And they wait
• 33:34
  Speaker 1: until like we had one just the other day. Can
• 33:36
  Speaker 1: you get a prenup done in four weeks? I can, but,
• 33:41
  Speaker 1: you know, when you try to rush a prenup and
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: they don't have a lawyer and you just want me
• 33:48
  Speaker 1: to draft something to hand to them to sign and
• 33:51
  Speaker 1: you're handing it to them like on the altar steps,
• 33:55
  Speaker 1: like those really call into question the reliabilities and the
• 34:01
  Speaker 1: sustainability of that prenup. A prenup done well has a
• 34:06
  Speaker 1: lot of disclosure, which is exchange of information, a lot
• 34:10
  Speaker 1: of transparency, which means see what each person has on
• 34:13
  Speaker 1: each side, And it takes a lot of time to
• 34:15
  Speaker 1: negotiate well with each person having a representative. That's what
• 34:20
  Speaker 1: makes the prenup most reliable. Because if you do that
• 34:24
  Speaker 1: prenup where you hand it to the other person that
• 34:27
  Speaker 1: your lawyer drafted the prenup, they don't know much about it.
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: You hand it to them on the altar steps and
• 34:31
  Speaker 1: they sign it. And then six months later, a year later,
• 34:34
  Speaker 1: five years later, you want to walk in and say, Oh,
• 34:36
  Speaker 1: but I've got a prenup. And they're like, but this
• 34:38
  Speaker 1: person didn't have a lawyer. They didn't have any disclosure.
• 34:40
  Speaker 1: They didn't know anything about it. They felt like they
• 34:42
  Speaker 1: were under duress.
• 34:43
  Speaker 3: That's like the Gary Turner, the first golden bachelor got
• 34:46
  Speaker 3: married on TV to Teresa Nist. And they, she was
• 34:52
  Speaker 3: the one that wanted to look it up, wanted a prenup.
• 34:55
  Speaker 3: They got married on ABC show, just saying. Um, and, uh,
• 35:00
  Speaker 3: But it seems like a fight, you know, and like
• 35:04
  Speaker 3: you said, you don't want to sneak that in. You
• 35:06
  Speaker 3: have to. It sounds like it starts at the beginning
• 35:08
  Speaker 3: of the relationship.
• 35:09
  Speaker 2: It's so interesting because when you buy a home or
• 35:14
  Speaker 2: you're buying an apartment, you have to show the assets.
• 35:18
  Speaker 2: So it's like, wait a minute, all of a sudden
• 35:19
  Speaker 2: you go to get married and you don't want to
• 35:21
  Speaker 2: show assets. And I think too, and I think we're
• 35:25
  Speaker 2: going to say thank you guys so much. We've gone
• 35:28
  Speaker 2: through so much with the emotional trauma, the financial trauma. Dennis,
• 35:31
  Speaker 2: you have the best advice. Your TikTok is amazing, insightful,
• 35:37
  Speaker 2: and fun. Courtney, you and your family love you. We
• 35:40
  Speaker 2: hope everything goes well. And I'm here for you on
• 35:42
  Speaker 2: and offline.
• 35:43
  Speaker 3: I'm here for you. You guys are both shotgun for me.
• 35:49
  Speaker 1: Thank you, ladies. This was so much fun. Do it first.
• 35:53
  Speaker 1: I love that, Courtney. Do it first. Get the information first,
• 35:57
  Speaker 1: way before the prenup, so you know who you're marrying. Sorry,
• 36:00
  Speaker 1: I had to squeeze that in.
• 36:01
  Speaker 3: No, no, squeeze it all in. I don't want to
• 36:04
  Speaker 3: rush the conversation. I want to, I think that we
• 36:07
  Speaker 3: all have a voice and I think that you and
• 36:09
  Speaker 3: all three of us have something in common, a common thread.
• 36:12
  Speaker 3: It's no accident that we are here today to use
• 36:15
  Speaker 3: our voices and our power to help people that don't
• 36:20
  Speaker 3: know that have to run in the house and grab
• 36:22
  Speaker 3: the cat. And now the locks are changed on me.
• 36:24
  Speaker 3: Like you don't know what you don't know. And I
• 36:28
  Speaker 3: hope that we can prevent other people from feeling as
• 36:33
  Speaker 3: terrible as divorce can feel because it's very scary.
• 36:37
  Speaker 1: And if you don't have a support group, you think
• 36:40
  Speaker 1: you have no one. You don't have no one. You're
• 36:43
  Speaker 1: not alone. You're right here, right here. This is your
• 36:46
  Speaker 1: support group.
• 36:46
  Speaker 2: There you go. Oh, you're going to make me cry, Dennis.
• 36:50
  Speaker 1: Seriously. I'd love that.
• 36:51
  Speaker 3: I'm going to go get a cheeseburger and a cold
• 36:53
  Speaker 3: beer on you.
• 36:54
  Speaker 1: Yes, please.
• 36:58
  Speaker 3: We got to laugh our way through it. You know,
• 37:00
  Speaker 3: I know my sense of humor isn't for everybody. Let's go.
• 37:03
  Speaker 3: I want onions. All right, you guys, I sure hope
• 37:08
  Speaker 3: you enjoyed this episode of I do part two with
• 37:10
  Speaker 3: me and Kelly and Dennis. If you did, please rate, review, subscribe,
• 37:14
  Speaker 3: maybe share it with a friend that this could help.
• 37:16
  Speaker 3: That's what we're here for. Do you have questions about prenups?
• 37:19
  Speaker 3: Maybe you need some advice. We want to help. So
• 37:22
  Speaker 3: send us an email or leave a voicemail. All the
• 37:25
  Speaker 3: info is in the show notes and follow us on
• 37:28
  Speaker 3: social media. That's the digital age we live in. I
• 37:32
  Speaker 3: do part two, an I heart podcast where falling in
• 37:35
  Speaker 3: love is the main objective, but also please fall in
• 37:38
  Speaker 3: love with yourself. Thanks for listening.