Latest / The Dutch Investors / #103 | 10 Rules for Marriage That Also Apply to Investing

Transcript

#103 | 10 Rules for Marriage That Also Apply to Investing · The Dutch Investors

• 0:03
  SPEAKER_01: Hey everybody, welcome back to the Dutch Investors.
• 0:06
  SPEAKER_01: I'm your host Sim, and today this episode is quite personal.
• 0:13
  SPEAKER_01: Now, normally on this podcast we talk about capital allocation, risk management, public companies, and building wealth over decades.
• 0:23
  SPEAKER_01: But today we're looking at an entirely different kind of investment.
• 0:29
  SPEAKER_01: On July 1st, 2026, I married my lovely wife Ariane after we had been together for close to 10 years.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_01: And it turns out, knowing someone for a decade doesn't make you any less a beginner at being married.
• 0:45
  SPEAKER_01: My colleagues and co-founders of the Dutch investors, Bauke, Luc and Matthijs, gave me something for my wedding, obviously.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_01: And because we are who we are, it naturally had to tie back to investing.
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_01: They put together 10 pieces of advice, bridging markets and marriage.
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_01: And after looking through it a couple of times, I realized that these are just great lessons, not just for beginners.
• 1:13
  SPEAKER_01: They're honestly the most valuable rules for life and investing.
• 1:18
  SPEAKER_01: So let's break down so let's break down 10 rules for marriage that also apply to investing.
• 1:46
  SPEAKER_00: In both investing and marriage, it's never about a single snapshot in time.
• 1:52
  SPEAKER_01: Just like a volatile week in the stock market doesn't define a fundamentally strong portfolio, a tough day or a stressful week doesn't define your marriage.
• 2:04
  SPEAKER_01: It's all about the broader trajectory.
• 2:06
  SPEAKER_01: You learn to look past the daily noise and focus on the lifetime trend line.
• 2:13
  SPEAKER_01: Lesson 2.
• 2:14
  SPEAKER_01: Select carefully at the start.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_01: The same goes for your partners.
• 2:37
  SPEAKER_01: Spending almost a decade together before tying the knot gave us plenty of time to do our own research and due diligence, and I couldn't be more certain of my decision.
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_01: Though, to be completely transparent, I'm still a bit unsure about what kind of research she did on me.
• 2:55
  SPEAKER_01: Lesson 3.
• 2:57
  SPEAKER_01: Don't panic when things don't go as planned.
• 3:01
  SPEAKER_00: Every investment and every relationship goes through downturns.
• 3:05
  SPEAKER_00: That's just part of the deal.
• 3:07
  SPEAKER_00: The real art is in weathering these periods together.
• 3:14
  SPEAKER_01: Market corrections are inevitable, and so are life's challenges.
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_01: The absolute worst thing an investor can do during a market dip is panic sell at the bottom.
• 3:27
  SPEAKER_01: In marriage, when things get tough, you don't pull out.
• 3:31
  SPEAKER_01: You hold tight, communicate, and ride out the storm together, knowing that calmer waters always lie ahead.
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_01: Lesson 4.
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_01: Consistency matters more than big gestures.
• 3:45
  SPEAKER_00: It's rarely the massive, flashy actions that make the biggest difference.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_00: It's the small things you keep doing year in and year out.
• 3:54
  SPEAKER_01: You don't build wealth by trying to time a single massive trade.
• 3:59
  SPEAKER_01: And you don't build a marriage solely on grand expensive vacations or milestone anniversary gifts.
• 4:06
  SPEAKER_01: It's the daily habits, making a coffee together, saying thank you, and actively listening that compound into a secure, loving partnership.
• 4:17
  SPEAKER_01: Lesson 5.
• 4:19
  SPEAKER_01: Avoid comparing yourself to others.
• 4:22
  SPEAKER_00: From the outside, someone else's relationship or portfolio might look flawless, but you never see the whole picture.
• 4:30
  SPEAKER_01: Comparison is the ultimate thief of joy.
• 4:34
  SPEAKER_01: Whether you're looking at someone else's highlight reel portfolio on social media, or their seemingly perfect relationship.
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_01: Every couple and every portfolio has its own risk tolerance, hidden struggles, and unique dynamics.
• 4:50
  SPEAKER_01: Focus on your own track record, not the neighbors.
• 4:54
  SPEAKER_01: Lesson 6.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_00: Focus on the long term.
• 4:58
  SPEAKER_00: Short-term wins or temporary excitement can seem highly attractive, but they can easily destroy something you spent years building.
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_01: This one seems obvious, right?
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_01: Chasing speculative hot tips or short-term thrills is a quick way to ruin a solid financial plan.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_01: Taking on debt to gamble, for example.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_01: In a committed relationship, protecting the trust and deep connection you've spent years building will always outweigh any passing short-term distractions.
• 5:29
  SPEAKER_01: Think, liquor, women, or anything else that might distract you from the long term.
• 5:35
  SPEAKER_01: So keep your eyes on the price and focus on the long term.
• 5:40
  SPEAKER_01: Lesson 7.
• 5:41
  SPEAKER_01: Compound interest.
• 5:45
  SPEAKER_00: The longer you keep investing in your relationship, the more valuable it becomes.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_01: Albert Einstein famously called compound interest the eighth wonder of the world.
• 5:55
  SPEAKER_01: In marriage, this works just as beautifully.
• 5:59
  SPEAKER_01: Every bit of trust, shared laughter, and mutual support you deposit today pays dividends tomorrow.
• 6:07
  SPEAKER_01: Over decades, that emotional capital compounds into a irreplaceable, priceless bond.
• 6:13
  SPEAKER_01: So, your wife or your partner is basically compound interest.
• 6:19
  SPEAKER_01: Lesson 8.
• 6:35
  SPEAKER_01: Any smart investor should know their cognitive biases and limitations.
• 6:40
  SPEAKER_01: In a partnership, you don't have to be perfect at everything.
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_01: Admitting where you fall short allows your partner's strength to be admitting where you fall short.
• 6:51
  SPEAKER_01: Or whatever you want to work on allows your partner's strengths to complement your weaknesses, making you far stronger together than you could ever be alone.
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_00: Invest on a regular basis.
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_01: Those ordinary, boring days serve as the bedrock foundation for your life together.
• 7:33
  SPEAKER_01: And last but not least, lesson 10, never stop learning.
• 7:39
  SPEAKER_00: People change and both of you will evolve.
• 7:43
  SPEAKER_00: Keep learning from and about each other and enjoy that journey.
• 8:03
  SPEAKER_01: Over the next 10, 20, and hopefully 50 years.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_01: The secret is to stay endlessly curious about each other and enjoy watching each other grow and evolve.
• 8:15
  SPEAKER_01: So to my friends, TDI co-founders, Bauke, Luke and Matthijs, thank you for the advice and thank you for being incredible friends.
• 8:24
  SPEAKER_01: And thank you to the listeners who have been so supportive of this podcast so far, and I hope we can compound this as well for the next 50 years.
• 8:35
  SPEAKER_01: Who knows?
• 8:36
  SPEAKER_01: So whether you're an investor, a partner, managing a portfolio, or building a life with someone you love, remember the most valuable investments are the ones we show up for every single day.
• 8:50
  SPEAKER_01: And thanks for listening.
• 8:52
  SPEAKER_01: Until next time, stay curious, keep learning, and happy investing.