Latest / Clyde Confidential / Coming Home, Doing It All, and Trusting Your Gut with Lily Rabe

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Coming Home, Doing It All, and Trusting Your Gut with Lily Rabe · Clyde Confidential

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: How do you find balance and what grounds you?
• 0:02
  Speaker 2: I don't have any balance?
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: What ground about? Welcome back everyone to another episode of
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: Clyde Confidential. I'm really excited to introduce to one of
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: my favorite people, Lily Rabe. She's an actress, a producer,
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: and a mom and one of my very good friends.
• 0:27
  Speaker 2: I'm so happy to be here.
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: Thank you, Thank you for coming, because Lily just moved
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: back to New York from LA and I think her
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: moving truck was supposed to come this week, so I'm
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: sure you were incredibly crazed, but you still made time,
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: and I'm really really grateful, So thank you.
• 0:40
  Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, anything for you. I'm so grateful to
• 0:43
  Speaker 2: you for so many things. We'll get there.
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: We'll get there. How does it feel being back in
• 0:48
  Speaker 1: New York.
• 0:49
  Speaker 2: It feels amazing. It feels like I just kind of
• 0:54
  Speaker 2: my shoulders drop when I'm in New York. I always
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: have felt that way being here, being away, coming back,
• 1:00
  Speaker 2: like even just landing in JFK, I would kind of
• 1:02
  Speaker 2: feel like I was coming back into my body a
• 1:06
  Speaker 2: little bit. And so being here again in such a
• 1:10
  Speaker 2: real way and unpacking boxes and watching my kids immerse
• 1:16
  Speaker 2: themselves into new York in this way that is so
• 1:18
  Speaker 2: because kids do everything so immediately. It's so incredible. And
• 1:23
  Speaker 2: what like, we were here I don't know a week
• 1:27
  Speaker 2: and I walk them up up to school every day
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: and with the double stroller and one of my kids
• 1:34
  Speaker 2: on a scooter. And then this one day was pouring
• 1:39
  Speaker 2: and I said to them, I think we should get
• 1:40
  Speaker 2: in the cab. And they were like a car thrilled.
• 1:51
  Speaker 2: A week away from LA and they were like car
• 1:54
  Speaker 2: no way. So funny Hamish said this, and I thought
• 1:58
  Speaker 2: it was so profound and also kind of simple and true,
• 2:02
  Speaker 2: which is in LA your children are so often behind
• 2:07
  Speaker 2: you because they're in the backseat of the car, and
• 2:09
  Speaker 2: in New York they're always in front of you. And
• 2:11
  Speaker 2: there's something really amazing about that just point of view
• 2:17
  Speaker 2: watching your children sort of walk through the subway or
• 2:22
  Speaker 2: down the street or whatever, as opposed to like checking
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: on them in the rear view. I mean, I don't
• 2:28
  Speaker 2: mean to I'm immediately just it's a wonderful place to
• 2:33
  Speaker 2: live and a wonderful place to raise children. I'm just
• 2:37
  Speaker 2: I'm for New York, I am, and it's really I
• 2:43
  Speaker 2: do feel really energized to be back.
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: I'm so happy for you. I will say, I think
• 2:47
  Speaker 1: you're the first person I've ever spoken to you to
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: say I feel so refreshed landing at JFK.
• 2:52
  Speaker 2: It's really something about like the and I think as
• 2:55
  Speaker 2: I'm kind of I love being alone. I'm an introvert.
• 3:00
  Speaker 2: It's something about, you know, the pace of the city
• 3:03
  Speaker 2: and the energy of the city, and the chaos of
• 3:06
  Speaker 2: the city and the busyness of it actually does calm
• 3:10
  Speaker 2: me down. I've done more. I've left my house more times,
• 3:13
  Speaker 2: I think since I got here than I have in
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: the past.
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: Like, that's crazy. Okay, So what have you been doing
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: since you've been back in New York?
• 3:20
  Speaker 2: This weekend I went to was I felt so fancy.
• 3:24
  Speaker 2: I went to the ballet on Saturday night with my
• 3:27
  Speaker 2: eight year old, which the thing I used to do
• 3:30
  Speaker 2: with my mother all the time, go to New York
• 3:32
  Speaker 2: City Ballet and we would sit in the front row
• 3:35
  Speaker 2: of the balcony, and we got tickets to the front
• 3:37
  Speaker 2: row of the balcony, and it was so wonderful to
• 3:40
  Speaker 2: be there with her. And there's this dancer that I
• 3:42
  Speaker 2: really love who I have Actually I met her because
• 3:45
  Speaker 2: she came to see a play of mine. And we
• 3:47
  Speaker 2: kind of become friends, which is so amazing because she's
• 3:50
  Speaker 2: like Lebron James to me or something. She's she's your
• 3:54
  Speaker 2: hero kind and she she knew I was there and
• 4:01
  Speaker 2: texted me to come back, and then my daughter got
• 4:03
  Speaker 2: to walk out on stage with her and it was
• 4:06
  Speaker 2: And then the next night we went to the Opera's amazing.
• 4:10
  Speaker 2: So to be at Lincoln Center like two nights in
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  Speaker 2: a row, seeing the ballet and the opera, and I don't.
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: Know, you can't beat the culture of New York, that's
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: for sure.
• 4:19
  Speaker 2: Last time I went to Odeon with like a new
• 4:21
  Speaker 2: mom friend. I love that And she's amazing.
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: Yeah, how's been making new mom friends.
• 4:27
  Speaker 2: It's kind of great. When I was here. So we
• 4:29
  Speaker 2: were here last winter doing Ghosts, a play, and during
• 4:34
  Speaker 2: that time, my kids were here in school for this
• 4:37
  Speaker 2: short for like four months, but I didn't really get
• 4:40
  Speaker 2: to meet a lot of the parent I was just
• 4:42
  Speaker 2: at the theater all the time, and so I didn't
• 4:45
  Speaker 2: quite get as I knew. I really loved these schools
• 4:49
  Speaker 2: and felt so lucky that we were able to be
• 4:50
  Speaker 2: there for that short period of time, but I really
• 4:55
  Speaker 2: didn't get to meet a lot of people. And it's
• 4:58
  Speaker 2: so nice kind of just grading with the community now
• 5:01
  Speaker 2: and New York it really does feel so small. Like
• 5:05
  Speaker 2: this mom, we walked out today after drop off and
• 5:10
  Speaker 2: we have a mutual friend or actually I was supposed
• 5:14
  Speaker 2: to do a movie with her husband that lost its mine.
• 5:17
  Speaker 2: So we walked out onto the street like talking talking,
• 5:21
  Speaker 2: and then you know, let's sharing our exchanging numbers and
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: let's get together. And then I went like to hair
• 5:29
  Speaker 2: to get my hair highlighted, and I walked in and
• 5:31
  Speaker 2: there was the mom so in a totally different part
• 5:35
  Speaker 2: of town like New York does have that really ran
• 5:38
  Speaker 2: into you on the street the first with your beautiful dog. Anyway,
• 5:45
  Speaker 2: that was really fun. It's really nice making I've made
• 5:48
  Speaker 2: some of the great friends that I've ever had through
• 5:52
  Speaker 2: my children. That was one of the hardest things about
• 5:55
  Speaker 2: leaving LA I should say, is that like I had
• 5:58
  Speaker 2: a handful of friends, both moms and dads who were
• 6:03
  Speaker 2: really like had I met them in the wild, I
• 6:06
  Speaker 2: would have fallen in love with them, because you do.
• 6:08
  Speaker 2: You have parent friends where like the kids love each
• 6:11
  Speaker 2: other and you make it work. You're like nothing, but
• 6:17
  Speaker 2: it happen. But this was like an embarrassment of riches.
• 6:22
  Speaker 2: There were so many people that I loved in every
• 6:27
  Speaker 2: way and felt so lucky to have met them through
• 6:30
  Speaker 2: my You'll get that.
• 6:30
  Speaker 1: Here come the time. It's a fun exercise as an
• 6:34
  Speaker 1: adult to be making new adult friends and doing the
• 6:37
  Speaker 1: girl dinners like I did that when I first moved
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: to LA and now I have a great group. Yeah,
• 6:41
  Speaker 1: but you'll always be back and forth, I think, because
• 6:43
  Speaker 1: we both work in entertainment and that's just what happens.
• 6:46
  Speaker 2: It's true. So FaceTime is great. Voice notes are great.
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: We love a voice. You and I voice not each other.
• 6:53
  Speaker 1: That's our only form of communication. So I love getting
• 6:57
  Speaker 1: a four minute long voice oote from you.
• 6:59
  Speaker 2: But sometimes it's so good, like I can't.
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: I voice notte all of my friends and I definitely
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: voice note Patrick and my whole team, and they're just
• 7:09
  Speaker 1: used to it by now.
• 7:10
  Speaker 2: It's the only way to communicate. It really can be good,
• 7:12
  Speaker 2: and it's soothing. Your voice is so soon.
• 7:16
  Speaker 1: I love it. Should we walk everyone back to how
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: we met. Yeah, weirdly met when you were looking for
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: an assistant, and then when you came to New York,
• 7:24
  Speaker 1: we got you some help.
• 7:25
  Speaker 2: YEP. I mean, what's so incredible? Is like I was
• 7:28
  Speaker 2: thinking about this on the way here, and I was
• 7:35
  Speaker 2: thinking about how as an actor, you know, you go
• 7:39
  Speaker 2: through it's like these very short, ultimately short like even
• 7:45
  Speaker 2: when it's a long run of something or a longer shoot, yep,
• 7:49
  Speaker 2: it's such an intense period of time. You you make
• 7:53
  Speaker 2: these very intense relationships and then you like leave and
• 8:01
  Speaker 2: we sort of get used to it, but you kind
• 8:04
  Speaker 2: of never get used to it. And then as I've
• 8:07
  Speaker 2: like for so long, I was just it was it
• 8:09
  Speaker 2: was just me and I didn't need help in the
• 8:12
  Speaker 2: way that I do now, or like support in the
• 8:15
  Speaker 2: ways that you've helped me with. But when you go
• 8:20
  Speaker 2: on location or if you know and you have it
• 8:22
  Speaker 2: like with New York, where we knew it was just
• 8:24
  Speaker 2: like a short term thing, and it was always that way.
• 8:27
  Speaker 2: It wasn't like it was going to be a four
• 8:30
  Speaker 2: month job. But there you know, it's your it's your
• 8:33
  Speaker 2: life and your children and your family and your I
• 8:36
  Speaker 2: was doing this play where I was sort of like
• 8:38
  Speaker 2: ripped open all the time, So you're just open all
• 8:40
  Speaker 2: the time, and I get so attached to people and
• 8:46
  Speaker 2: even knowing that it is like when you know and
• 8:49
  Speaker 2: it happens with jobs too. It's it's hard because you
• 8:53
  Speaker 2: kind of you know you there of course there it's
• 8:56
  Speaker 2: it's a job and there are boundaries, but it's like
• 9:02
  Speaker 2: a big emotional thing having these intimate relationships that then
• 9:07
  Speaker 2: and luckily I'm very close touch with all of that.
• 9:11
  Speaker 2: But what I was thinking as I was driving over
• 9:13
  Speaker 2: here is thank God I have you, Like I don't
• 9:16
  Speaker 2: have to I don't have to put up that same
• 9:21
  Speaker 2: kind of I don't have to protect myself in the
• 9:23
  Speaker 2: same way because I'm like, oh, I can just this
• 9:27
  Speaker 2: is the this is the long relationship. And then some
• 9:30
  Speaker 2: of the other relationships will inevitably be long, but some
• 9:33
  Speaker 2: of them aren't meant to like they are. The structure
• 9:36
  Speaker 2: of them is short. And so I'm just so grateful
• 9:39
  Speaker 2: to be able to have my relationship with you that
• 9:42
  Speaker 2: can kind of carry through all of that.
• 9:46
  Speaker 1: Thank you. That's really sweet. And I think because I
• 9:49
  Speaker 1: know you so well at this stage, because it's been
• 9:51
  Speaker 1: a couple of years, I know who to send when
• 9:53
  Speaker 1: you need temporary help or you need an assistant in
• 9:56
  Speaker 1: New York while you're doing a play, And I know
• 9:59
  Speaker 1: who to send because we've gotten to know each other.
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: And as you mentioned, it is so intimate, and they're
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: around your kids, and whoever I send you is a
• 10:07
  Speaker 1: reflection on me at the end of the day. So
• 10:10
  Speaker 1: I'm thank you for trusting me to do this, of course,
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: and I'm glad that you feel like you have good
• 10:15
  Speaker 1: people around you.
• 10:16
  Speaker 2: Now, Yeah, really good like and they have even even
• 10:20
  Speaker 2: the ones that were short gigs like yeah, I have
• 10:24
  Speaker 2: become long run.
• 10:25
  Speaker 1: That's also a testament to you as a person and Hamish,
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: because you guys are truly so lovely and that makes
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: people want to come back. If I didn't like my
• 10:33
  Speaker 1: old boss and she said come over and hang, I
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: would be out of town, you know. So it's a
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: testament to you too.
• 10:40
  Speaker 2: Oh well, thanks, thank you.
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: So tell everyone what your current team structure is.
• 10:47
  Speaker 2: Like, representative wise or support wise.
• 10:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, who do you have around you at this moment?
• 10:53
  Speaker 2: I have? I have my manager, No, my yes, agent
• 10:58
  Speaker 2: turned my manager was my agent. Now she will be
• 11:01
  Speaker 2: my manager forever. I'm sure that's.
• 11:03
  Speaker 1: Also a testament to your relationship with this person right now.
• 11:06
  Speaker 2: We have a big, deep, long relationship.
• 11:09
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but you guys are in it and we're here
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: to stay.
• 11:13
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, we're deeply in I trust her. I
• 11:19
  Speaker 2: respect her taste so much. I also really love like,
• 11:23
  Speaker 2: I'm not a person who with reps. I really especially
• 11:29
  Speaker 2: when you have more than one, like if you have
• 11:32
  Speaker 2: an agent, a manager and a lawyer or whatever. I
• 11:36
  Speaker 2: really don't want everyone to agree all the time. And
• 11:40
  Speaker 2: I really don't want them to agree with me all
• 11:42
  Speaker 2: the time. I'm like, I if i'm you know, part
• 11:46
  Speaker 2: of what I'm paying you for is you and like
• 11:51
  Speaker 2: your perspective and you're so I really appreciate kind of
• 11:56
  Speaker 2: healthy disagreement and here's why we think this is good.
• 12:00
  Speaker 2: Here's why. And then like, I think it's wonderful if
• 12:02
  Speaker 2: you have a team, if they're not, if they are,
• 12:05
  Speaker 2: if they you know, if they really can can disagree
• 12:08
  Speaker 2: about material or what the thing is that you should
• 12:11
  Speaker 2: do next, or why not, it's totally healthy.
• 12:14
  Speaker 1: You have a production company with Hamish, let's talk about that.
• 12:17
  Speaker 1: Do you guys have your different opinions that you bring
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: into work or.
• 12:21
  Speaker 2: How does that? How does that work?
• 12:23
  Speaker 1: Because that wouldn't work for a lot of people.
• 12:25
  Speaker 2: No, it would. I mean I've talked to so many
• 12:28
  Speaker 2: couples who are like, our relationship is great unless we
• 12:32
  Speaker 2: work together, Like that's the one thing we can't do.
• 12:34
  Speaker 2: We tried it and it like almost broke us up
• 12:36
  Speaker 2: or and then for us, it's not that I think
• 12:40
  Speaker 2: it's like the thing keeping us together, but it's definitely
• 12:45
  Speaker 2: something I can't imagine not doing. We love working together.
• 12:50
  Speaker 2: We've just and we met working together. We were cast
• 12:53
  Speaker 2: opposite one another. And and that was before we were dating.
• 12:56
  Speaker 2: That we were acting out together. And the thing I
• 12:59
  Speaker 2: loved the moment about acting with him was that he
• 13:02
  Speaker 2: would give me notes just like dating. Yeah, you know
• 13:08
  Speaker 2: you shouldn't really give other I mean there's probably some rule, right,
• 13:12
  Speaker 2: like I mean, makes me feel like I loved it
• 13:14
  Speaker 2: so much. I loved it so much. I love them
• 13:18
  Speaker 2: from certain people. And people say, that's so funny.
• 13:23
  Speaker 1: When he was giving you notes, did you know that
• 13:24
  Speaker 1: he had an ulterior motive?
• 13:26
  Speaker 2: Knowing he didn't, I mean, he didn't like he his
• 13:30
  Speaker 2: motive is always to make the work better.
• 13:32
  Speaker 1: Did you know that he had some feelings?
• 13:35
  Speaker 2: I didn't. I mean maybe like looking back, and I'm
• 13:38
  Speaker 2: sure I did too, But we really we we we
• 13:43
  Speaker 2: did have. It was a little like meeting someone and
• 13:48
  Speaker 2: you know where you think, Oh we kind do we share?
• 13:51
  Speaker 2: Do we share? Like parts of the same brain. I mean,
• 13:57
  Speaker 2: it really is like, what's that line from Frozen? Frozen
• 14:04
  Speaker 2: finish each others?
• 14:06
  Speaker 1: Have you been watching Frozen with your kids?
• 14:10
  Speaker 2: My mom was an actor. That was something you know
• 14:15
  Speaker 2: when when she would she would ask me, she'd be like,
• 14:17
  Speaker 2: can you come watch this preview of whatever I'm doing?
• 14:20
  Speaker 2: This is when I was older, and.
• 14:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah, is that how you've gotten into acting because your
• 14:24
  Speaker 1: mom was an actor?
• 14:24
  Speaker 2: No, I mean, if anything like the opposite. She was like,
• 14:27
  Speaker 2: don't do this. Wow. But she would ask me to
• 14:32
  Speaker 2: come watch a preview because she was like, you'll tell me,
• 14:34
  Speaker 2: you'll give me notes, you'll tell me what you actually think.
• 14:37
  Speaker 2: It's hard. People are so afraid of and I get it,
• 14:43
  Speaker 2: like egos are crazy and complicated and it's thorny. But
• 14:49
  Speaker 2: finding people that you really trust, who you know will
• 14:52
  Speaker 2: actually tell you what they think, yeah, because they want
• 14:56
  Speaker 2: it to be like they because they want the best
• 14:59
  Speaker 2: for you and whatever the thing is that you're doing.
• 15:02
  Speaker 2: And they're not going to tell you like this looks
• 15:05
  Speaker 2: great on you because they actually want you to look
• 15:07
  Speaker 2: like shit like the last people. It's just like I
• 15:10
  Speaker 2: just run towards them, and I value that so much
• 15:13
  Speaker 2: and I hope that I can be that for people
• 15:16
  Speaker 2: in my life too, And so that was something that
• 15:20
  Speaker 2: we shared very early on, and then we just kept
• 15:25
  Speaker 2: getting cast opposite each other. It was really wild. The
• 15:28
  Speaker 2: director who cast us in Merchant of Venice said he
• 15:34
  Speaker 2: was a man of He is a man of few words,
• 15:38
  Speaker 2: like the most brilliant words. But he was like, well,
• 15:41
  Speaker 2: it's just because I needed someone really tall, because Lily
• 15:44
  Speaker 2: is tall. But really he's like the reason that I
• 15:48
  Speaker 2: have my whole life. Wow.
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: Special And are you still in touch with him at all?
• 15:53
  Speaker 1: Or do you still do projects with him?
• 15:54
  Speaker 2: Yes?
• 15:55
  Speaker 1: Did you do ghost with him?
• 15:56
  Speaker 2: And forgive me no, that was Jack O'Brien, who I've
• 15:58
  Speaker 2: also done. We did, so we did much do about
• 16:01
  Speaker 2: Nothing with Jack and then Ghosts with Jack, And now
• 16:03
  Speaker 2: we're talking about something else that is such an intense play.
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: And well, Ghosts was very intense and I saw it
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: thanks to you because you got me amazing seats and
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: I was absolutely blown away by your performance. It was insane.
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: And doing a play is crazy, and I don't know
• 16:19
  Speaker 1: how it's crazy. I thought acting in a movie was
• 16:22
  Speaker 1: crazy because I had been on set with Jen, but
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: then when I learned about what you go through with
• 16:26
  Speaker 1: rehearsals for plays. I don't know what's crazier. How do
• 16:32
  Speaker 1: you deal with that?
• 16:33
  Speaker 2: I mean, it's the that I wonder because I was
• 16:37
  Speaker 2: a dance like I did ballet growing up, and there
• 16:41
  Speaker 2: is something about that you know what you're doing about
• 16:45
  Speaker 2: like you can't miss clatt Like you can't. You have
• 16:48
  Speaker 2: to do it, however many times a week or you're
• 16:54
  Speaker 2: gonna lose. I mean, I don't know what it's like
• 16:57
  Speaker 2: to be an athlete, but I would imagine. You know,
• 16:59
  Speaker 2: it's like they there's no like doing it for practice,
• 17:01
  Speaker 2: takes days off and then you're always like starting at
• 17:06
  Speaker 2: the bar and always going back to the beginning and
• 17:09
  Speaker 2: that kind of discipline and that kind of uh that
• 17:13
  Speaker 2: that part of the process doing eight shows a week.
• 17:18
  Speaker 2: It's really like that's how I learned how to act,
• 17:23
  Speaker 2: was doing plays, was doing theater. Wow, it is exhausting
• 17:27
  Speaker 2: and it's relentless, but it also feels like the most
• 17:29
  Speaker 2: natural thing in the world to me in a way.
• 17:31
  Speaker 1: You can do that, then you can go I'm sure
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: doing a movie is a breeze.
• 17:35
  Speaker 2: It really does make others not a breeze, but just
• 17:38
  Speaker 2: it does. And I remember like I was doing a
• 17:40
  Speaker 2: show where we were shooting pretty consistently like for a while,
• 17:43
  Speaker 2: sixteen hours, and everyone was like, this is insane. And
• 17:47
  Speaker 2: the crew, I mean, the crew is there before that
• 17:49
  Speaker 2: isn't But like I was, I felt like, this is okay.
• 17:54
  Speaker 2: You do get I think you get a lot of stamina,
• 17:57
  Speaker 2: it's just.
• 17:57
  Speaker 1: A different level of intensity maybe.
• 18:00
  Speaker 2: A lot of things. You don't have days off. You
• 18:01
  Speaker 2: have one day off, which is like very like and
• 18:03
  Speaker 2: you go straight.
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: Just it's very impressive.
• 18:08
  Speaker 2: It's very very thanks. I love it so much. I
• 18:10
  Speaker 2: feel so lucky to do it. I can't believe I
• 18:11
  Speaker 2: was away from it as long as I was. Wow.
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: And what do you prefer? Do you prefer plays or
• 18:17
  Speaker 1: do you prefer prefer acting in films?
• 18:21
  Speaker 2: I think uh, for me, the best material that I
• 18:25
  Speaker 2: have consistently been able to do has been in the theater.
• 18:30
  Speaker 2: Like I've played sort of some of the great like
• 18:33
  Speaker 2: the great parts ever written. I haven't had that in
• 18:38
  Speaker 2: film just to be like I've had I could point
• 18:41
  Speaker 2: to a few films where I have felt like this
• 18:44
  Speaker 2: was such, this was a part I would have, you know,
• 18:48
  Speaker 2: I like would have given anything to play and I
• 18:50
  Speaker 2: got to play it.
• 18:51
  Speaker 1: But.
• 18:53
  Speaker 2: It's not always the case. And so I think more
• 18:57
  Speaker 2: than do I prefer, like what media do? I prefer.
• 19:00
  Speaker 2: It's really like where is the great material that I'm
• 19:07
  Speaker 2: able to do, and so wherever that happens. That's also
• 19:10
  Speaker 2: wonderful to do on a television show because then you
• 19:12
  Speaker 2: get to do it for longer. Like that's really the
• 19:16
  Speaker 2: thing for me, because I'm just not a person. I
• 19:20
  Speaker 2: just never I've never been a person who is like
• 19:25
  Speaker 2: I just don't fatigue very easily. If I'm stimulated by
• 19:31
  Speaker 2: my work.
• 19:31
  Speaker 1: That's a great quality. Yeah, it's a great quality.
• 19:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah, But it can be hard when you have like
• 19:35
  Speaker 2: a bunch of kids and you're trying to, you know, in.
• 19:37
  Speaker 1: Your life, and how are you managing all this stuff
• 19:40
  Speaker 1: going on in your life right now, a move to
• 19:42
  Speaker 1: a new city, kids, being a mom, trying to balance
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: your career, taking off in your career, doing all these
• 19:48
  Speaker 1: exciting things, having a production company. How do you find
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: balance and what grounds you?
• 19:54
  Speaker 2: I don't have any balance. I don't have any balance
• 20:00
  Speaker 2: in my life. I don't. Oh no, I mean I have,
• 20:04
  Speaker 2: like but that's it's like the circus, it's you know,
• 20:07
  Speaker 2: it's like I.
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: I know people like you who just just keep going listen.
• 20:12
  Speaker 2: There are moments when I'm like, I want to move
• 20:13
  Speaker 2: to the country and like garden and never you know.
• 20:20
  Speaker 1: How would you move to Garden, like.
• 20:22
  Speaker 2: Upstate New York or like or out of the country.
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: I mean upstate is possible, It's close.
• 20:29
  Speaker 2: Yeah, But I but the way I manage it is
• 20:36
  Speaker 2: really you like, I couldn't if I if I didn't
• 20:40
  Speaker 2: have you, I really don't. I'm not I mean, guys,
• 20:45
  Speaker 2: I did not like I don't know what I tell
• 20:48
  Speaker 2: her to see that. I don't know what I would
• 20:50
  Speaker 2: do because it really we are constantly faced and we
• 20:54
  Speaker 2: hamish and I we had a moment of like, should
• 21:01
  Speaker 2: we try to you know, not take jobs at the
• 21:03
  Speaker 2: same exact time or that is not that's not possible
• 21:09
  Speaker 2: for us. We frankly don't have enough control over our
• 21:13
  Speaker 2: careers in terms of like when the things are going
• 21:15
  Speaker 2: to come for us that we want to do. Also,
• 21:17
  Speaker 2: we both love to work, so for us to kind
• 21:22
  Speaker 2: of put like a cap on that not that I respect.
• 21:26
  Speaker 2: So I know couples do that, and I respect it
• 21:28
  Speaker 2: so much. It makes so much sense to me. It
• 21:30
  Speaker 2: just like doesn't we don't we don't know how to
• 21:32
  Speaker 2: kind of wear that we're much better at wearing, like
• 21:38
  Speaker 2: putting on the hats of I'm really going with this metaphor.
• 21:41
  Speaker 2: But you know, okay, we this is this is the
• 21:45
  Speaker 2: new thing. We both want to do, these jobs, or
• 21:47
  Speaker 2: maybe it's like one is a job that one person
• 21:50
  Speaker 2: wants to do and the other is a job that
• 21:52
  Speaker 2: we feel we have to do because like someone's going
• 21:54
  Speaker 2: to make money, the other person isn't going to make money.
• 21:56
  Speaker 2: Whatever it is. We're often faced with that kind of
• 22:00
  Speaker 2: like how do we tetris this? How do we make
• 22:04
  Speaker 2: this work? Because it doesn't make any sense on paper
• 22:10
  Speaker 2: for you to be shooting there and me to be
• 22:11
  Speaker 2: here and the kids are in school here, and like
• 22:13
  Speaker 2: what are we going to do? And the mom I
• 22:17
  Speaker 2: was talking to on the street today, she was like,
• 22:20
  Speaker 2: what do you guys? What does it look like for you?
• 22:22
  Speaker 2: And I was like, it just looks different every single time.
• 22:25
  Speaker 2: But the thing that it's the same is that I
• 22:26
  Speaker 2: always make up the morning call on you first, and
• 22:27
  Speaker 2: I'm like, here's what I'm dealing with, Like what do
• 22:30
  Speaker 2: I do?
• 22:31
  Speaker 3: But we manage it and we're here, and yeah, like
• 22:34
  Speaker 3: I totally respect the fact that you guys are both
• 22:37
  Speaker 3: workers and you put all of your energy into obviously
• 22:40
  Speaker 3: your family, but your careers.
• 22:42
  Speaker 1: And I'm a type of person who's always going to
• 22:44
  Speaker 1: be like that too, And I think my partner will
• 22:46
  Speaker 1: probably be like that too. I'm I'm the same as you.
• 22:48
  Speaker 1: I love to do, I mean, on things. At once,
• 22:50
  Speaker 1: when I told my team that I wanted to start
• 22:53
  Speaker 1: a podcast, they were like, why you are running a startup?
• 22:56
  Speaker 1: And you are right crazy. Also my family and my
• 22:59
  Speaker 1: friends we were insane. Why don't you just do that later?
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: But I want to do it now and I don't care,
• 23:05
  Speaker 1: and I'll figure it out. And I have someone to
• 23:07
  Speaker 1: watch my dogs while I come here and film, so
• 23:10
  Speaker 1: my duln and triever doesn't eat the podcast studio. You know,
• 23:13
  Speaker 1: it's also crazy, But I think because crazy is all
• 23:16
  Speaker 1: we know, it's sort of the only thing that keeps me.
• 23:21
  Speaker 1: The crazy keeps me sane.
• 23:22
  Speaker 2: Kind of. I like it.
• 23:23
  Speaker 1: I like to be doing million things that once I'm
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: good at it, so are you?
• 23:27
  Speaker 2: Yeah, And I I think, and now there really is
• 23:32
  Speaker 2: Like the minute we started having kids, I mean, I
• 23:37
  Speaker 2: always had my stepdaughter, so we always had a kid together,
• 23:40
  Speaker 2: like there was never a moment of like the two
• 23:42
  Speaker 2: of us just you know, my mom really stepped away
• 23:46
  Speaker 2: from work for a long time when I was little.
• 23:49
  Speaker 2: It's definitely something I struggle with, though she did say
• 23:54
  Speaker 2: to me, she was like, you don't have to do it.
• 23:56
  Speaker 2: You don't have to be as extreme as I was. Like,
• 23:58
  Speaker 2: I think I over compensated a lot. But for me, yeah,
• 24:02
  Speaker 2: it was so amazing because I have almost no childhood
• 24:06
  Speaker 2: memories of her not being with me. That's great and
• 24:10
  Speaker 2: I am somehow I'm very determined for my children to
• 24:17
  Speaker 2: feel that way too, whether it's whether it's me or Hamish,
• 24:21
  Speaker 2: but like I want them to feel like, you know,
• 24:27
  Speaker 2: one of us or both of us, we're all there,
• 24:29
  Speaker 2: and they will and honestly, for the most part that
• 24:31
  Speaker 2: really is true. Like it's so rare that we're both
• 24:36
  Speaker 2: not with them. I mean I could count the nights
• 24:38
  Speaker 2: on that that doesn't happen. Yeah, we figured out and
• 24:45
  Speaker 2: like for when they were littler, I was always taking
• 24:48
  Speaker 2: them with me. And then now as they're getting older
• 24:51
  Speaker 2: and they're more like, you know, they don't want to
• 24:53
  Speaker 2: leave their friends and they have all this after school
• 24:55
  Speaker 2: and they're then it's a new it's figuring out for
• 25:00
  Speaker 2: me how how to be away from Like I just
• 25:04
  Speaker 2: did a job for the first time ever, leaving them
• 25:07
  Speaker 2: about like nine months ago. I really hadn't done that,
• 25:11
  Speaker 2: and we just broke it up. Like they came to visit.
• 25:15
  Speaker 2: I would come through. Where did you feed them? We
• 25:18
  Speaker 2: were shooting in North Carolina?
• 25:20
  Speaker 1: Okay, that's quick, that's yead.
• 25:22
  Speaker 2: And they came there for like ten days and then whatever.
• 25:25
  Speaker 2: We you just but then no two things ever look
• 25:28
  Speaker 2: the same, and we don't have both of our moms
• 25:32
  Speaker 2: are not around anymore, and we don't have sisters. And
• 25:36
  Speaker 2: I love my brothers, but like, I.
• 25:38
  Speaker 1: Did you grow up with only boys?
• 25:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah?
• 25:40
  Speaker 1: Me too, Yeah, four younger brothers.
• 25:42
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I love my brothers.
• 25:43
  Speaker 1: Maybe that's why we get on so well.
• 25:45
  Speaker 2: Because I think four younger four younger brothers.
• 25:48
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Every female I meet who grew up with just
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: boys I click with immediate.
• 25:54
  Speaker 2: Interesting.
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it teaches you something.
• 25:57
  Speaker 2: Yeah, Oh my god, I feel that way because I
• 25:59
  Speaker 2: have boy what are you? I'm middle, Well, I'm kind
• 26:03
  Speaker 2: of older though I have an older half brother. Okay,
• 26:06
  Speaker 2: so he was ten he is ten years older okay,
• 26:08
  Speaker 2: and then a younger My younger brother is three years younger. Wow,
• 26:12
  Speaker 2: But we were all in the same like, yeah, yeah, yeah,
• 26:15
  Speaker 2: it's it.
• 26:16
  Speaker 1: Just it really at the time, it was crazy and
• 26:20
  Speaker 1: I got ganged up on all the time. That was
• 26:22
  Speaker 1: their thing. Four So I have an Irish twin who
• 26:27
  Speaker 1: is eleven months younger, and then.
• 26:29
  Speaker 2: Triplet what yeah, triplet brothers.
• 26:34
  Speaker 1: They are three years younger than me.
• 26:36
  Speaker 2: Oh my god.
• 26:37
  Speaker 1: So we were all in school at the same time.
• 26:39
  Speaker 1: So and all of us went to Georgetown except for
• 26:42
  Speaker 1: one brother. So I would be out in college at
• 26:45
  Speaker 1: a bar and I would just they would scream my
• 26:47
  Speaker 1: name even down the hallways. It was torture. And then
• 26:50
  Speaker 1: at some point I don't remember which it must have
• 26:53
  Speaker 1: been when I was a senior because Kevin was a
• 26:55
  Speaker 1: junior at the triplets were freshmen. We became super close
• 26:58
  Speaker 1: and they were always at my house and hanging out
• 27:00
  Speaker 1: with my friends. But it taught me so much. It
• 27:02
  Speaker 1: taught me how to deal with men. It taught me
• 27:04
  Speaker 1: how to not care about certain things and be a
• 27:07
  Speaker 1: little bit more relaxed on certain topics that some of
• 27:10
  Speaker 1: my girlfriends probably are not so relaxed on, and just
• 27:14
  Speaker 1: I'm so grateful for it now.
• 27:17
  Speaker 2: But growing up was definitely can't, Like, I mean, I
• 27:22
  Speaker 2: have the I have three girls and boy, Yeah, so
• 27:24
  Speaker 2: I always think about like, yeah, my son having three sisters.
• 27:29
  Speaker 1: Then I think that's better than the other way around.
• 27:33
  Speaker 2: Well, I mean you're perfect, so I think it works out.
• 27:36
  Speaker 2: But it's definitely like to be out numbered in that way.
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but boys, he's going to be this. I'm sure
• 27:42
  Speaker 1: he already is the sweetest man because he knows how
• 27:44
  Speaker 1: to deal with women, and he's going to grow up
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: and be so grateful that he grew.
• 27:47
  Speaker 2: Up with sisters. It's pretty beautiful. Yeah, it is beautiful. Yeah.
• 27:53
  Speaker 1: How old is he?
• 27:54
  Speaker 2: Three?
• 27:56
  Speaker 1: And I'm sure that they adore him and.
• 27:57
  Speaker 2: Look out for Oh my gosh. Yeah.
• 28:00
  Speaker 1: Okay, So obviously you are so accomplished and impressive and
• 28:03
  Speaker 1: you are doing it all. You're an actress, you're a producer,
• 28:06
  Speaker 1: and you are a mom. What have been some career challenges,
• 28:09
  Speaker 1: personal challenges of maybe trying to balance it all or
• 28:13
  Speaker 1: just things moments where you've sort of stopped for a
• 28:17
  Speaker 1: second and then had to pivot.
• 28:20
  Speaker 2: I want to feel like I'm doing it all. It's impossible, too, Like,
• 28:28
  Speaker 2: even if you have your kids with you at all times,
• 28:33
  Speaker 2: you can't have them on your lap between action and cut,
• 28:36
  Speaker 2: like there are there. You can't bring them on stage
• 28:40
  Speaker 2: with you?
• 28:40
  Speaker 1: Ye? Do they go to set?
• 28:44
  Speaker 2: It depends like now they're really But when there were babies, Yes,
• 28:48
  Speaker 2: I've breastfed on so many sets. I directed a movie
• 28:51
  Speaker 2: with a three week old like I yes, wow, I've done.
• 28:57
  Speaker 2: I've also worked pregnant so much and through COVID breastfeeding
• 29:04
  Speaker 2: and also like how that changed.
• 29:06
  Speaker 1: COVID was not were you I was not?
• 29:08
  Speaker 2: Like it did work a lot during COVID actually, and
• 29:12
  Speaker 2: because I had my babies. I had one in twenty
• 29:14
  Speaker 2: seventeen one and twenty twenty and one in twenty twenty two.
• 29:17
  Speaker 1: Oh my god.
• 29:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so and there were wild things like I was
• 29:21
  Speaker 2: I was pregnant during one job and they had written
• 29:25
  Speaker 2: the pregnancy into the plot and then COVID shut us down.
• 29:31
  Speaker 2: By the time we were actually shooting, I'd had the baby, right,
• 29:35
  Speaker 2: but at that point the pregnantity had become like a
• 29:37
  Speaker 2: really important blot point. Yeah, so then I was breastfeeding
• 29:41
  Speaker 2: my infant, like on my fake belly that was initially
• 29:44
  Speaker 2: supposed to be.
• 29:45
  Speaker 1: A real pregnant belly. Yeah.
• 29:47
  Speaker 2: A lot of the things that I was shooting when
• 29:49
  Speaker 2: I was pregnant were very intense and there was like
• 29:52
  Speaker 2: a lot of violence, and that was It's surreal because
• 29:56
  Speaker 2: you sort of wonder we've gone off topic, but like
• 30:00
  Speaker 2: it would I would love to talk to other actresses
• 30:03
  Speaker 2: who've worked pregnant, like what they've done during that time,
• 30:07
  Speaker 2: and wondering like how that's it's a lot going into
• 30:11
  Speaker 2: your body and going into your your brain because it's
• 30:14
  Speaker 2: you know so much of what we do. It's like
• 30:16
  Speaker 2: your body doesn't your body doesn't totally know the difference.
• 30:19
  Speaker 2: So then like this little embryo in there is getting
• 30:23
  Speaker 2: these cortisol hits or whatever. Yeah, but anyway, they've all.
• 30:27
  Speaker 1: You can tell your kids you've been on the set
• 30:29
  Speaker 1: of this and this and this.
• 30:30
  Speaker 2: But I wasn't like doing like romantic comedies while they
• 30:33
  Speaker 2: ran there. But anyway, yes, breastfeeding a lot on set.
• 30:37
  Speaker 2: I'm an incredibly hands on mom. We're both really hands
• 30:41
  Speaker 2: on parents. We want to do everything. We don't want
• 30:44
  Speaker 2: to miss anything. But then you can't. You can't and
• 30:48
  Speaker 2: we don't have. You know, if my mother were alive,
• 30:51
  Speaker 2: I feel like we never would have had to hire
• 30:53
  Speaker 2: a nanny ever. But she isn't and my mother we
• 31:01
  Speaker 2: call Kristen because we're not married my mother in love.
• 31:04
  Speaker 2: We can't be the first people to ever do that.
• 31:05
  Speaker 2: But anyway, very cute. But she isn't here either, and
• 31:11
  Speaker 2: she was around a little bit in the beginning, but
• 31:13
  Speaker 2: was in Scotland, so we didn't have that family thing.
• 31:17
  Speaker 2: And I don't mean poor me, like it's just this
• 31:19
  Speaker 2: is my life. But I definitely get envious of my
• 31:23
  Speaker 2: friends who drop their kids off with their parents, or
• 31:31
  Speaker 2: their parents like move in because they're going to do
• 31:33
  Speaker 2: a job, or they have sisters who have kids and
• 31:37
  Speaker 2: or brothers who have kids and they you know, I
• 31:39
  Speaker 2: I'm definitely envious of that. But I have so many
• 31:45
  Speaker 2: incredible things, and I have the most wonderful family and
• 31:47
  Speaker 2: the most amazing partner, and this is something that we've lost,
• 31:53
  Speaker 2: Like I think probably the pain of knowing how great
• 31:56
  Speaker 2: my mother would have been.
• 31:58
  Speaker 1: Well, if she's your mom, she's been amazing.
• 32:00
  Speaker 2: She was amazing, She was amazing, and she really would
• 32:03
  Speaker 2: have been like, yeah, all the way everybody else, you know,
• 32:06
  Speaker 2: in the best way. Yeah, but then also like let me,
• 32:10
  Speaker 2: she would have been perfect. She would have been perfect.
• 32:13
  Speaker 2: But anyway, she's not here, so so I so you
• 32:16
  Speaker 2: have like saved my life because like I don't, I mean,
• 32:20
  Speaker 2: we really don't. We don't. That is not Someone said
• 32:24
  Speaker 2: this wonderful acting couple. They're both incredibly successful. They work
• 32:28
  Speaker 2: so much, they do a million things, and they have
• 32:31
  Speaker 2: a child. And I was we were sort of talking
• 32:34
  Speaker 2: to one of them at a party and how do
• 32:37
  Speaker 2: you do it? And the thing whatever, like what does
• 32:39
  Speaker 2: it look like for you guys? And he said, well,
• 32:41
  Speaker 2: we have a third leg to our table because one
• 32:46
  Speaker 2: of their mothers lives very close by. It was so
• 32:50
  Speaker 2: knowing that he said that, And we don't have a
• 32:57
  Speaker 2: third leg to our table and it's set, but we
• 33:01
  Speaker 2: have all of these little pieces of wood that we
• 33:05
  Speaker 2: kind of put together, yeah, to make that third leg there,
• 33:10
  Speaker 2: and we figured it out. And it's just like it
• 33:14
  Speaker 2: would be incredible if that person were one person, and
• 33:16
  Speaker 2: that person happened to be related to the kids, and
• 33:21
  Speaker 2: what a gift. But I feel so lucky that, you know,
• 33:25
  Speaker 2: we've figured out how to kind of like cobble that
• 33:28
  Speaker 2: third leg together, and that we can afford to do that,
• 33:33
  Speaker 2: and we'll just keep working so that we can continue
• 33:36
  Speaker 2: to afford to do that. And then my kids have
• 33:38
  Speaker 2: these you know, wonderful relationships with people who come in
• 33:42
  Speaker 2: and out and.
• 33:43
  Speaker 1: Who become like family, who become like family.
• 33:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah, totally.
• 33:46
  Speaker 1: Well, you deserve to have the best people around you
• 33:48
  Speaker 1: at all times because you are so special. And I
• 33:53
  Speaker 1: completely know how you feel with that third leg. I
• 33:57
  Speaker 1: am not close with my parents. I have and talk
• 34:00
  Speaker 1: to them in yours and I when I have all
• 34:03
  Speaker 1: this stuff going on with work, I'm like, I also
• 34:06
  Speaker 1: need a third leg. I need a team I need.
• 34:09
  Speaker 1: I now have an assistant and I adore her and
• 34:12
  Speaker 1: she just I truly could not survive without her. But
• 34:15
  Speaker 1: I feel the same way of like the wood of
• 34:17
  Speaker 1: who is gonna help? Because I have this baby, which
• 34:23
  Speaker 1: is my company, and now this podcast, and I'm trying to,
• 34:28
  Speaker 1: you know, fit the pieces. And I think that's why
• 34:30
  Speaker 1: my personal and business relationships are so important to me,
• 34:34
  Speaker 1: because I put everything into them because I don't have
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: the other ones to really fall back on. It is
• 34:40
  Speaker 1: a happy story I grew up or when I was
• 34:43
  Speaker 1: in college. I nan need for this family who I
• 34:45
  Speaker 1: absolutely adore, and they have kind of stepped in as
• 34:49
  Speaker 1: pseudo mom and dad. So I do have people, they
• 34:51
  Speaker 1: just live across the country, so I need people on
• 34:54
  Speaker 1: the ground in LA and New York.
• 34:57
  Speaker 2: They're so lucky to have. Yeah, I'm glad you had
• 34:59
  Speaker 2: the they're the best.
• 35:00
  Speaker 1: They're the best. But I find myself doing the same thing,
• 35:05
  Speaker 1: being like, hmm, it would be nice to, you know,
• 35:07
  Speaker 1: have that leg, but you find other things and you
• 35:10
  Speaker 1: find other people come into your life to sort of
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: fill that leg, feel that leg. Does that sound weird?
• 35:17
  Speaker 2: Well, yeah, it's like, yeah, you like call it together,
• 35:20
  Speaker 2: you know.
• 35:21
  Speaker 1: But especially if you have kids, you know, that's something
• 35:23
  Speaker 1: to think about, like, oh yeah, it would have been
• 35:24
  Speaker 1: like it would have been a fun thing to share.
• 35:28
  Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, I mean I think about that. Yeah,
• 35:30
  Speaker 2: it's it's all I think about. Yeah, but that's just
• 35:33
  Speaker 2: because my mom was so remarkable. And listen, my dad
• 35:37
  Speaker 2: is great. I love my dad, and my dad is
• 35:40
  Speaker 2: alive and you know, he's like he's the one grandparent
• 35:43
  Speaker 2: we've got and he's amazing. But you know, we're not
• 35:45
  Speaker 2: in the same place and it's just different and.
• 35:47
  Speaker 1: It's hard to wrap up. Lily, any advice that you
• 35:50
  Speaker 1: would give someone who's looking to be in theater or
• 35:54
  Speaker 1: in film, just from what you've learned so far, what
• 35:58
  Speaker 1: would you say to them.
• 36:00
  Speaker 2: You know, my advice is sort of probably annoying because
• 36:03
  Speaker 2: I always just say when actors ask me, I always
• 36:09
  Speaker 2: just say to do theater and do plays. And that
• 36:13
  Speaker 2: could be frustrating to an actor who doesn't have any
• 36:16
  Speaker 2: interest in that. I totally understand that. But the discipline
• 36:20
  Speaker 2: and the rigor and like the muscularity of that schedule
• 36:27
  Speaker 2: of what it is to do a play, I think
• 36:32
  Speaker 2: I just feel like it teaches you so many things
• 36:37
  Speaker 2: and is so valuable to yeah, have that discipline and
• 36:42
  Speaker 2: so but that could also be annoying because it's like
• 36:45
  Speaker 2: we'll go do plays and then you're like, well, what
• 36:46
  Speaker 2: if I can't so, But I also think, just sort
• 36:50
  Speaker 2: of from an acting perspective, like just reading plays and
• 36:53
  Speaker 2: getting together with your friends and reading them. I mean
• 36:55
  Speaker 2: I've done that. We still do that, where you'll get
• 36:59
  Speaker 2: a bunch of friend together and just read a play
• 37:02
  Speaker 2: or yeah, or like if there's a play that you
• 37:05
  Speaker 2: feel like you're never gonna be able to do, like
• 37:07
  Speaker 2: The Seagull or something, we did a reading on a
• 37:10
  Speaker 2: couch of the Seagul with no agenda whatsoever, like no
• 37:15
  Speaker 2: feeling of this is going to turn into anything. But
• 37:18
  Speaker 2: there are just so many great plays, and it's so
• 37:20
  Speaker 2: wonderful to say the words. But I also think doing
• 37:25
  Speaker 2: something where there is that kind of schedule is really invaluable,
• 37:31
  Speaker 2: and so I always give that advice. The other thing
• 37:34
  Speaker 2: I would say to someone who wants to go into
• 37:41
  Speaker 2: it's kind of like the way that I would talk.
• 37:45
  Speaker 2: You know, when when someone is pregnant and like about
• 37:47
  Speaker 2: to have then they're like, what advice, And I'm like,
• 37:50
  Speaker 2: my advice is like, don't take a lot of advice.
• 37:53
  Speaker 2: Liked ask for advice and listen to it, of course,
• 37:58
  Speaker 2: but it's not don't take advice. Don't don't take any
• 38:01
  Speaker 2: one person's advice, as it will be different for you,
• 38:06
  Speaker 2: Like it will be so different for you. Pregnancy. All
• 38:09
  Speaker 2: my three pregnancies were so different. All my three birds
• 38:11
  Speaker 2: were so different. These three humans and four humans with
• 38:16
  Speaker 2: my stepdaughter, Like, I'm watching these these they're so different
• 38:21
  Speaker 2: and they're so themselves, And I guess that's something that
• 38:26
  Speaker 2: like in as I raise kids and learn so much
• 38:34
  Speaker 2: from who they are, you can do yourself a great
• 38:37
  Speaker 2: disservice if you think that it should look a certain way,
• 38:40
  Speaker 2: or it should look like this person's career, or if
• 38:44
  Speaker 2: I make this choice, it will lead to this thing.
• 38:46
  Speaker 2: So gather all the information, get all the advice, and
• 38:49
  Speaker 2: then really stay as true to the things that are
• 38:56
  Speaker 2: that belong to you and and like follow that because
• 39:00
  Speaker 2: your career won't look like anyone else's. It'll be super painful,
• 39:06
  Speaker 2: no matter how wonderful it is. And I think, I mean,
• 39:12
  Speaker 2: it's it's there are so many it's such a you know,
• 39:15
  Speaker 2: there's so many ups and downs and that's part of it,
• 39:18
  Speaker 2: and you sort of have to just like dive in
• 39:22
  Speaker 2: and and but I think it's just so it's so
• 39:31
  Speaker 2: important to not feel like it should look any any
• 39:34
  Speaker 2: which way.
• 39:35
  Speaker 1: That might be the best advice that I've ever heard.
• 39:38
  Speaker 1: The best advice is don't take too much advice to heart.
• 39:42
  Speaker 2: Yeah, like take listen to it, get it, listen to
• 39:46
  Speaker 2: it in here, I mean take you know, what you
• 39:48
  Speaker 2: really take and what you're then going to make your
• 39:50
  Speaker 2: you know, always check in with yeah, with that thing
• 39:53
  Speaker 2: because because you also because I've done that, Like I
• 39:55
  Speaker 2: did that early where I would think like Okay, if
• 39:58
  Speaker 2: I doesn't quite feel right or I don't, but I'm
• 40:02
  Speaker 2: gonna do it because it'll lead to this or because
• 40:04
  Speaker 2: that person told me to do it or that, and
• 40:06
  Speaker 2: it's like that those are never the things that led
• 40:08
  Speaker 2: to the really great things for.
• 40:10
  Speaker 1: Me, well said, I mean, I think as I get older,
• 40:13
  Speaker 1: I learned that my gut is such a real thing,
• 40:17
  Speaker 1: and if I'm feeling a certain way about a friend
• 40:19
  Speaker 1: or something work related, my gut is always right. Yeah,
• 40:24
  Speaker 1: And you just like some some days if something's off,
• 40:28
  Speaker 1: I literally have like a huge pain in my stomach,
• 40:31
  Speaker 1: Like I know, I just know what's right, what's wrong.
• 40:36
  Speaker 1: Like if there's a weird vibe I'm feeling about someone,
• 40:38
  Speaker 1: I'm usually correct and that I think that's me too.
• 40:41
  Speaker 2: But then that's very strong. I just read some like
• 40:44
  Speaker 2: meme or whatever, but it was like, is this my
• 40:48
  Speaker 2: intuition or my anxiety?
• 40:51
  Speaker 1: They kind of together, they kind of ride there together.
• 40:54
  Speaker 4: But like like I don't know, I'm not a very
• 40:59
  Speaker 4: anxious person, but like if someone's making me anxious, it's
• 41:02
  Speaker 4: for a reason, right, right, Like.
• 41:04
  Speaker 1: You just know, and that's why you're good with people.
• 41:07
  Speaker 1: I'm good with people. That's good advice.
• 41:10
  Speaker 2: The pregnancy thing is so wild because everyone's really excited
• 41:16
  Speaker 2: to give you advice when you're pregnant, right, And that's wonderful.
• 41:21
  Speaker 2: It's so different, so different. Yeah, and this is gonna hap.
• 41:26
  Speaker 2: I remember some people like, well, this is going to
• 41:28
  Speaker 2: happen to your body after you have and I was like,
• 41:31
  Speaker 2: because it happened to you.
• 41:32
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you have to ask for this at this time
• 41:34
  Speaker 1: or all say stick the balloon.
• 41:36
  Speaker 2: Up you Like, right, there's I mean, it's so anyway,
• 41:39
  Speaker 2: But I just I have I have thought about that
• 41:42
  Speaker 2: just kind of in terms of everything now where it's
• 41:44
  Speaker 2: like you get surprised by it in your own life too,
• 41:47
  Speaker 2: because then you also think like, okay, well I've done
• 41:49
  Speaker 2: this once now, so I sort of know what to expect,
• 41:51
  Speaker 2: but you don't. And that's wonderful.
• 41:53
  Speaker 1: But yeah, how beautiful is that that just we get
• 41:56
  Speaker 1: to wake up tomorrow in New York and be like,
• 41:59
  Speaker 1: I don't know what today is going to bring, and
• 42:01
  Speaker 1: that's so exciting. And that's sort of how I actually
• 42:04
  Speaker 1: look at my life these days. I don't know who
• 42:06
  Speaker 1: I'm going to meet, what is going to fall on
• 42:08
  Speaker 1: my plate. And I know you feel the same way.
• 42:11
  Speaker 1: It's such a cool feeling to actually not know sometimes and.
• 42:14
  Speaker 2: It can be very anxiety inducing. But I think the
• 42:18
  Speaker 2: more you can sort of lean into the to the
• 42:23
  Speaker 2: joyful part of that feeling. And there is I mean
• 42:27
  Speaker 2: that is a great thing about this business. It's like,
• 42:31
  Speaker 2: you know, for better or worse, but there's nothing you know,
• 42:36
  Speaker 2: it doesn't happen in a very kind of flu yeah.
• 42:38
  Speaker 1: When you're no, no, it's sort of.
• 42:40
  Speaker 2: Like yeah yeah, and then like the phone rings and
• 42:45
  Speaker 2: suddenly you're like, oh yeah, this is a whole new
• 42:49
  Speaker 2: and and and then it comes with its whole new
• 42:53
  Speaker 2: set of issues because logistics that I'm always just like, okay,
• 42:57
  Speaker 2: I'm just gonna call Megan.
• 43:00
  Speaker 1: To reform in it long days now to say, so
• 43:03
  Speaker 1: here's what I'm looking at.
• 43:05
  Speaker 2: I was.
• 43:06
  Speaker 1: Last thing I'll say is I was speaking with one
• 43:08
  Speaker 1: of my other clients the other week. We were in
• 43:10
  Speaker 1: La together, and he said, my life is about to
• 43:12
  Speaker 1: get so crazy because he's really going like this his career.
• 43:16
  Speaker 1: It's really cool to see. And he said, I asked him,
• 43:19
  Speaker 1: what's the what's your favorite part of your day or
• 43:22
  Speaker 1: what are you most excited about? And he said, I'm
• 43:24
  Speaker 1: most excited about not knowing who's going to be on
• 43:26
  Speaker 1: the other end of that phone call. So he says
• 43:30
  Speaker 1: the craziest people call him sometimes and he's like, okay,
• 43:34
  Speaker 1: we're doing it like such an insane position to be
• 43:39
  Speaker 1: in when you really just have no idea who's going
• 43:42
  Speaker 1: to be giving you an opportunity or calling to ask
• 43:44
  Speaker 1: you to go get lunch or showing up for you.
• 43:47
  Speaker 1: So I love living our lives this way. I think it's,
• 43:52
  Speaker 1: you know, it's just having a really positive outlook and
• 43:55
  Speaker 1: knowing that people surprise you and experiences surprise you. And
• 44:01
  Speaker 1: you're now in a new city and I'm so excited.
• 44:03
  Speaker 2: For New York to surprise you my new old city. Yeah, yeah,
• 44:08
  Speaker 2: it does surprise me. It is. It's like going back
• 44:10
  Speaker 2: into like this amazing relationship that I had, and I'm
• 44:16
  Speaker 2: so excited for you even different, and then it's also
• 44:19
  Speaker 2: totally familiar and cozy.
• 44:20
  Speaker 1: Totally familiar. It's home home. But yeah, well, thank you
• 44:24
  Speaker 1: so much for coming on.
• 44:25
  Speaker 2: You are the best.
• 44:26
  Speaker 1: She is seriously so wonderful, and I hope you just
• 44:32
  Speaker 1: get to know her in the same way that I
• 44:33
  Speaker 1: know her, because I yeah
• 44:35
  Speaker 2: I love you, I love you, Thank you, thank you,