Latest / Two Personal with Joy Taylor / Kendra G Gets Real on Sex, Single Life and What Women Really Want

Transcript

Kendra G Gets Real on Sex, Single Life and What Women Really Want · Two Personal with Joy Taylor

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: There's some men who, and I said this recently, their
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: penis is their currency.
• 0:04
  Speaker 2: Okay, if I want to have sex tonight, just get
• 0:07
  Speaker 2: me check it. Hey, I'm having sex to night. Oh.
• 0:10
  Speaker 3: I can do both well. I can do both well.
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: I can receive very well, and I can give.
• 0:17
  Speaker 4: Shout the way we almost all went to jail.
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: What did you do?
• 0:27
  Speaker 2: Hey, guys, it's Joy Taylor. Thanks so much for joining
• 0:29
  Speaker 2: us on Too Personal. If you haven't already, make sure
• 0:32
  Speaker 2: that you subscribe and follow us on social media at
• 0:34
  Speaker 2: Too Personal Show. Very excited for today's show. My friends,
• 0:38
  Speaker 2: Kendrege is on the show. She has an incredible dating
• 0:41
  Speaker 2: show and an app, and now she has a card
• 0:44
  Speaker 2: game and we are going to talk all about it.
• 0:46
  Speaker 4: So now it's time for Kenjigi.
• 0:48
  Speaker 2: My next guest is not just my very dear friend,
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: but she is also a media personality turns CEO, and
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: she has changed the game when it comes to dating online.
• 1:00
  Speaker 2: Missus tendre G. Welcome Bye's Too Personal.
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: Joy to the world, Joy to the world. I'm loving
• 1:05
  Speaker 1: to Bobby looking good girl, Babiana. Yes, I'm my green
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: is matching the obviouce I lo sure.
• 1:12
  Speaker 2: But well, we all you know you always look cordeous
• 1:14
  Speaker 2: in your bag of course, yes, the famous bag. If
• 1:17
  Speaker 2: that ever comes up missing.
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: Girl, No it won't come up missing.
• 1:20
  Speaker 2: I have what do you call those earn at my place.
• 1:26
  Speaker 4: I return it.
• 1:26
  Speaker 2: I'm just borrowing. Thank you so much for coming down,
• 1:29
  Speaker 2: you for having.
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: Me, and so honor to be talking to the one
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: and only I mean media, extra extra not can I
• 1:36
  Speaker 1: get my words together?
• 1:37
  Speaker 3: Fabulous? Joy Taylor.
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: You know what's so funny When I first moved to
• 1:41
  Speaker 1: LA and like, I willd have house parties and enjoys
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: my friends. So Joy would be at my house parties
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: and then people will text me like, you know, Joy Taylor,
• 1:48
  Speaker 1: Oh my god. So you're like, they know you're on
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: this world's girl to they do?
• 1:54
  Speaker 2: I guess no, Your your house parts are very fun.
• 1:58
  Speaker 2: Kenju goes all out with everything.
• 2:00
  Speaker 4: She does everything.
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: The last party, we almost got evicted, so they had
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: a whole we had. It was a whole thing.
• 2:08
  Speaker 3: So I haven't had a party since then because last not.
• 2:11
  Speaker 4: The one we we we were all the way.
• 2:13
  Speaker 1: Upstairs we went, So there's two times. That was the housewarming,
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: then there was the Christmas party. It was the Christmas
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: party that I almost got evicted because it was a
• 2:20
  Speaker 1: christ from the housewarming was just really people that I knew,
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: and I think they got the wind of it. So
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: by time the Christmas party. You ever have a throw
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: a party and then you're saying hi to people who
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: you don't know in your house, no, like that's what happened.
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: There was people that I did not know, and I
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: was like, who invited you? And literally my building. They
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: gave me a really nice like we don't do this here.
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: So I haven't had a party since, but before I moved,
• 2:44
  Speaker 1: I will have one more party because even out it's
• 2:47
  Speaker 1: like like the month that I'm moving out, I'm gonna
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: have a party, Like, can't kick me out I'm leaving.
• 2:50
  Speaker 2: Oh I don't like I've had some part parties, but
• 2:55
  Speaker 2: I don't know how many I've had where I didn't
• 2:59
  Speaker 2: know who the person and.
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: Oh my god. Absolutely and then and mind you, this
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: was in my home. So you have parties at spaces.
• 3:06
  Speaker 1: I was literally in my home and I was like,
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: I don't know you, like who invited you?
• 3:10
  Speaker 3: So but it was still a good time.
• 3:12
  Speaker 2: I had a party at my mom's house once, like
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: a Project X party, and I told her I was
• 3:16
  Speaker 2: having the party because my mom doesn't play about that.
• 3:20
  Speaker 2: And this this, oh my god child, the way, we
• 3:26
  Speaker 2: almost all went to jail.
• 3:28
  Speaker 1: What did you do?
• 3:30
  Speaker 2: Well?
• 3:30
  Speaker 4: I got into it.
• 3:31
  Speaker 2: How old were you? I mean, I was like twenty four.
• 3:35
  Speaker 4: Twenty three or something. But this this little boy puked
• 3:39
  Speaker 4: on my mama's floor.
• 3:42
  Speaker 2: Said I'm gonna say what I did. But he got out,
• 3:45
  Speaker 2: he had to get out, and I was so mad.
• 3:47
  Speaker 2: I circled back around looking for him. They were like, joy,
• 3:49
  Speaker 2: you didn't already kick out. I was so bad. But
• 3:53
  Speaker 2: could you imagine?
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: No, I have a mom's story that you shouldn't do things.
• 3:57
  Speaker 1: But I was younger. I was sixteen. My mom was
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: out of town. We had like a gathering, and we
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: took her car and we went this is what made us.
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: We went to the grocery store, and like one of
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: my mom's friends saw us at the grocery store and
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: told my mother when she came back from wherever she was,
• 4:12
  Speaker 1: and I got in so much trouble.
• 4:14
  Speaker 2: I didn't get in trouble because I told her, yeah,
• 4:17
  Speaker 2: I was on it.
• 4:18
  Speaker 4: I was like, we're having a party, you're going to
• 4:20
  Speaker 4: be there.
• 4:21
  Speaker 2: She was like, all right, Before we get started, Oh, god,
• 4:25
  Speaker 2: on everything we do a personal question to start, I
• 4:28
  Speaker 2: will answer it with you.
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: Oh, your answer with me? Okay, okay, let's see, let's see. Okay,
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: here it goes. Do you believe in monogamy? Absolutely? Because
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: I don't believe in getting herpes. I believe in monogamy
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: so I don't have to wake up with an STD.
• 4:44
  Speaker 2: No, that's so dramatic, you know what.
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: No, but it's not dramatic. But it's like we you
• 4:49
  Speaker 1: know again, I you know, like you said in the beginning,
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: really I come from I'm a journalist, right and for
• 4:54
  Speaker 1: twenty years I interviewed celebrities like you know, actors, radio, television,
• 4:58
  Speaker 1: and then five years ago I started at my dating
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: show and I've been interviewing single people ever since. And
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: I love it, you know, I love it. It's my joy.
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: You know. We'll get into the all of that. But
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: one thing I've learned is people don't talk about the
• 5:12
  Speaker 1: serious act of sex anymore. It's just like we have
• 5:15
  Speaker 1: gotten into this situationship space without recognizing like, not only
• 5:19
  Speaker 1: are you potentially sharing like a man, and you know
• 5:23
  Speaker 1: that means you could potentially sharing STD. So if the
• 5:26
  Speaker 1: girl that you're sleeping with got a cold and now
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: I got a cold. Like you know, these are the
• 5:31
  Speaker 1: things that we are so lost in this conversation and
• 5:34
  Speaker 1: we have to bring it back to the forefront because
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: you know, babies are just one thing that can happen.
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: But you can literally like last I check, you know,
• 5:45
  Speaker 1: herfie still exists, you know, like like you know, you know.
• 5:49
  Speaker 2: Am I amongst others?
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, and other things and just that. So yeah,
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: I believe in monogamy because it's like, let's just get
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: back to the point of when you are sharing your
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: with someone. And look, they're gonna be like, why is
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: Kendrick being so deep? But let's just be honest. When
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: you're sharing your body with someone, you are putting your
• 6:07
  Speaker 1: life at risk. You know what I'm saying. If you
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: don't know what that person and you're putting your life
• 6:12
  Speaker 1: at risk for a couple of reasons. Right One, they
• 6:15
  Speaker 1: can have a crazy wife who will kill you if
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: she finds out about you, or or the guy cap
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: you can have a crazy boyfriend that will kill the
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: guy you're sleeping with. That's one way life at risk.
• 6:26
  Speaker 1: And then the other way is they can be carrying
• 6:29
  Speaker 1: an sud and if they give it to you in
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: that moment, then now you have it. It was that
• 6:33
  Speaker 1: moment of pressure worth it. I know you guys wasn't
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: expecting Kendrick G to say all that today.
• 6:38
  Speaker 2: Well, I mean, when you put it like that, why
• 6:41
  Speaker 2: not saying my life is at risk? It?
• 6:44
  Speaker 4: I remembent.
• 6:45
  Speaker 2: No, well, okay, I think let's address non monogamous relationships
• 6:52
  Speaker 2: in that way. I am not saying free for all
• 6:56
  Speaker 2: sleep with people?
• 6:57
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 6:57
  Speaker 2: There are people who are a non monogamous relationship, yes,
• 7:01
  Speaker 2: who are frequently tested, Yes, who have open communications? Yes?
• 7:06
  Speaker 2: Do you believe that those relationships not for you?
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: Right?
• 7:10
  Speaker 2: No?
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: Absolutely? I believe. The one thing my show taught me
• 7:14
  Speaker 1: is you got to find your tribe. Okay, it's just like, oh,
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: you gotta find Oh you want to keep this one.
• 7:19
  Speaker 1: It's like, and I thought about it like this. I'm
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: a big I have so many gay friends, LGBTQ friends.
• 7:26
  Speaker 3: I'm a big supporter. So I'm a supporter.
• 7:28
  Speaker 1: If a man and a man feel as though they
• 7:31
  Speaker 1: love each other and they want to be in a relationship,
• 7:33
  Speaker 1: So if I can support that, If a man is
• 7:36
  Speaker 1: honest and it's like I can't be with one woman
• 7:39
  Speaker 1: I have to be with more than one woman. It
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: wouldn't be for me, but I have to respect his
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: decision of how he wants to date, just like I
• 7:48
  Speaker 1: respect two men who want to be in a relationship.
• 7:50
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 7:51
  Speaker 1: I think that we're in a space right now where
• 7:54
  Speaker 1: you gotta be. I'd rather you tell me what it is,
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: let me have the decision to make on my own
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: and it might not be for me, but you go
• 8:03
  Speaker 1: find your tribe. And also hosting my show, what I
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: learned was I have women call me up. Women will
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: call in and say we're looking for a woman for
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: me and my guy. So I always thought it was
• 8:13
  Speaker 1: just men that wanted that. No, clearly it's women too.
• 8:16
  Speaker 2: I think monogamy. I'm so sorry I'm coughing because it's.
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: I want to every time I cough. It's because of
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: Joy's Halloween party.
• 8:27
  Speaker 2: Stud I woke up two guys in a row now
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: and complaining, no, no, my Bob's it. But I'm just
• 8:32
  Speaker 2: letting you have Loriel onto it.
• 8:33
  Speaker 1: She was like she got sick. So I hit those
• 8:36
  Speaker 1: cloths out, you know, just so just f my eye.
• 8:38
  Speaker 1: But I don't feel bad because it's your fault.
• 8:40
  Speaker 2: But anyway, I think monogamy is monogamy wouldn't work for you, No,
• 8:50
  Speaker 2: I prefer monogamy. I am a monogamous person when I'm
• 8:53
  Speaker 2: in a relationship. Okay, I don't if I choose to
• 8:55
  Speaker 2: be in a relationship. I'm in a relationship, I don't
• 8:59
  Speaker 2: feel the need to. It's not even my body doesn't
• 9:02
  Speaker 2: like multiple people. Okay, so.
• 9:06
  Speaker 4: It just doesn't respond to that.
• 9:08
  Speaker 2: And I don't desire other people physically emotionally.
• 9:13
  Speaker 3: Most women are wired like that.
• 9:15
  Speaker 2: Yeah, But I also very much understand that for certain people,
• 9:20
  Speaker 2: in certain spaces, it's very hard to be in a
• 9:24
  Speaker 2: monogamous relationship. And I don't think it's an excuse for
• 9:28
  Speaker 2: men to cheat. I think it's important for people to
• 9:30
  Speaker 2: have open conversations about what actually works for them.
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: Well, let's define cheating, because if you're in a situationship and.
• 9:38
  Speaker 2: The guy, well, situationships are not I'm not even talking
• 9:40
  Speaker 2: about situationships. A situationship is just one person too attached
• 9:47
  Speaker 2: to someone who is not with them.
• 9:49
  Speaker 1: Right. But the reason I said cheating is because I
• 9:51
  Speaker 1: feel like a lot of times you gotta decide who
• 9:55
  Speaker 1: you are in this relationship to, right, Because women say, oh,
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: a guy cheated, But he was never admitted to you, right, right,
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: You never had their you never had the conversation of exclusivity. Yeah,
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: that's not cheating, So that's not cheating.
• 10:05
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: So we're on the same page there. I think anything
• 10:08
  Speaker 1: will open dialogue. Now, you say you feel like monogamy
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: is hard. When you were saying when you were saying that,
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: was you saying it from a mouse perspective or a woman's.
• 10:15
  Speaker 2: I think for I think for men monogamy is obviously
• 10:18
  Speaker 2: harder than it is for women. Why because men are
• 10:23
  Speaker 2: not Because most men value sex and want to want
• 10:28
  Speaker 2: to take things down. And I don't know, I'm not
• 10:31
  Speaker 2: a man. I don't know why they do the things
• 10:32
  Speaker 2: that they do.
• 10:33
  Speaker 1: I think that, See, your world's you know, you've been
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: a blessed somebody like your your regular worlds is the
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: one percent of the human beings that walk on this planet, right,
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: like your regular worlds? Your regular life are you know,
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: extremely successful men, extremely wealthy men.
• 10:51
  Speaker 3: That's that's your regular life. No, there's no like.
• 10:55
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm saying certain people. For certain people, monogamy becomes
• 11:00
  Speaker 2: difficult if you're traveling all the time for work, if
• 11:04
  Speaker 2: you're an entertainer all over the world. If you're someone
• 11:07
  Speaker 2: who has women throwing themselves at them constantly, I'm not
• 11:11
  Speaker 2: saying that it's right or wrong. I'm saying that women,
• 11:14
  Speaker 2: we especially beautiful women, we have this our entire lives,
• 11:19
  Speaker 2: men throwing themselves at us, Like, Okay, if I want
• 11:23
  Speaker 2: to have sex tonight, just let me a second. Okay,
• 11:27
  Speaker 2: I'm having sex tonight. They can come here now, I'll
• 11:29
  Speaker 2: be in the bathroom like I don't as there's no
• 11:31
  Speaker 2: work required at all, zero work. I have to move
• 11:34
  Speaker 2: my thumb around to make that happen. So I just
• 11:37
  Speaker 2: think that, and you're right, I am exposed to situations
• 11:40
  Speaker 2: and circumstances that make me say this, but that I'm
• 11:43
  Speaker 2: also speaking about certain situations. I'm not saying that a
• 11:46
  Speaker 2: guy that can come home every day after work and
• 11:49
  Speaker 2: his wife is there needs to be an anominogous relationship. However,
• 11:53
  Speaker 2: those people can be a nomnogamous relationships as well if
• 11:56
  Speaker 2: they have an open dialogue about it.
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: Right, The only thing I would challenge is the word
• 11:59
  Speaker 1: most because really, what you although it's your regular life,
• 12:03
  Speaker 1: you were talking about at best five percent of men,
• 12:06
  Speaker 1: there's only really five percent of men that have that life,
• 12:09
  Speaker 1: that are traveling. When we put the whole percent out
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: out there, right, so five percent of men make that
• 12:14
  Speaker 1: kind of money traveling around the world on jets, that
• 12:18
  Speaker 1: doesn't represent the majority of men, right, So that's where
• 12:22
  Speaker 1: the confusion comes in. So that five percent of men, yes,
• 12:25
  Speaker 1: they have every single desire and way with their women.
• 12:29
  Speaker 1: Most men have to work to get a woman. Most
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: men can't even afford to sleep with will afford to
• 12:37
  Speaker 1: date more than one woman. Now, there are some women.
• 12:40
  Speaker 1: There's some men who and I said this recently, their
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: penis is their currency.
• 12:44
  Speaker 3: And let me break that down.
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: They may not have a job, but they have good
• 12:48
  Speaker 1: penis and they have figured out a way to attach
• 12:51
  Speaker 1: themselves to women who don't who might do better than
• 12:54
  Speaker 1: them in life. Right, No judgment because we're we're just
• 12:57
  Speaker 1: doing the observation, right.
• 12:58
  Speaker 4: No good run in your life?
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: Hi, Well, it depends on who you ask. I think
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: Chris Jenner would beg to differ. I think Chris Jenner
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: is like living her best life. Do you think he waits? Okay,
• 13:10
  Speaker 1: I mean this is no shot, right, Like, this is
• 13:12
  Speaker 1: not a disc I'm just talking about observation. Chris Jenner
• 13:16
  Speaker 1: Kim Kardashian's mom has is, what's sixty six years old?
• 13:20
  Speaker 1: Her boyfriend is what maybe thirty five, forty, I don't know, holidays,
• 13:23
  Speaker 1: maybe he's forty. Right. Do you think he wakes up
• 13:26
  Speaker 1: every single day and says I can't wait to sleep
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: with a sixty six or a seventy year old white woman. No,
• 13:32
  Speaker 1: he wakes up.
• 13:32
  Speaker 4: I don't know he girl.
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: If she wasn't a billionaire in her rights, I highly
• 13:38
  Speaker 1: doubt they would be in a relationship.
• 13:40
  Speaker 2: I don't know. I can't.
• 13:41
  Speaker 4: I can't peak to.
• 13:43
  Speaker 1: Well I can I can predict the future on that one.
• 13:46
  Speaker 1: And even and the reason I brought it up because
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: you said good penis will ruin your life, Well, I'm
• 13:51
  Speaker 1: quite sure Chris Jenner is satisfied. And she's like, hey,
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: and I worked hard to become who I am and
• 13:59
  Speaker 1: I want to have pleasure life. And again there is
• 14:01
  Speaker 1: no judgment what.
• 14:09
  Speaker 2: I think. We're talking about two different things because there's
• 14:13
  Speaker 2: a little more background to that situation than oh, you
• 14:16
  Speaker 2: must know him person just that. No, I don't know
• 14:19
  Speaker 2: him personally, but it's what what what the good penis
• 14:25
  Speaker 2: category is, like, how do you get connected with that
• 14:29
  Speaker 2: person in the first place, what are you talking about.
• 14:31
  Speaker 1: They're in every hood in the nation. What are you
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: talking about? What are you talking about?
• 14:35
  Speaker 2: Like, what is this the penis hunter? You're like, find that?
• 14:38
  Speaker 1: Well, I'm not there a registry, is it? Okay? I
• 14:40
  Speaker 1: don't know because I'm not a girl that's been around
• 14:42
  Speaker 1: this world like that. But what I will say is this,
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: let me know, most women shouts him. My friend jes Nie,
• 14:47
  Speaker 1: she's a comedian and she has a whole I mean
• 14:50
  Speaker 1: it's a joke but true to it, and she has
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: a whole joke of broke. Penis gives it to you
• 14:54
  Speaker 1: the best because he's he's having he needs a place
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: to stay, so he's gonna give it to you. So
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: he's gonna he needs shelter and he doesn't have a
• 15:03
  Speaker 1: job to go to. That's why he could break it
• 15:05
  Speaker 1: down for you so good. They're in every hood, shelter
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: in the plan. Crazy, But there are men who definitely,
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: like I told you, there are men who use their
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: penis as their currency, and that's the way that they
• 15:17
  Speaker 1: stay connected and get closed every single week.
• 15:21
  Speaker 3: Listen, this is what women say.
• 15:22
  Speaker 2: Child.
• 15:23
  Speaker 1: I don't know, but I mean, listen, I mean this
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: really foreign I think that. But on the larger thing,
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: and I think this is what you were talking about,
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: is you know, being addicted to a person that can't
• 15:36
  Speaker 1: add anything to your life other than great sex could
• 15:39
  Speaker 1: be a dangerous place.
• 15:41
  Speaker 2: Yes, but I think it's.
• 15:43
  Speaker 4: I'm just I'm at the point in life.
• 15:45
  Speaker 2: I think I've seen enough, I've experienced enough, I have
• 15:50
  Speaker 2: been exposed to enough that the idea that everyone is
• 15:55
  Speaker 2: living these lives that they are projecting, for the most part,
• 16:01
  Speaker 2: is untrue. We do not see the intricacies of people's relationships.
• 16:07
  Speaker 2: What you see online, which you hear people talk about,
• 16:11
  Speaker 2: you very rarely get the raw, real reality of people's lives.
• 16:15
  Speaker 2: And the truth of the matter is, if you are
• 16:17
  Speaker 2: in relationships you we shouldn't get it. I don't want
• 16:19
  Speaker 2: to know what my married friends are going through. It's
• 16:21
  Speaker 2: not my business, you know. I think that there are
• 16:24
  Speaker 2: things that you should keep to yourselves and not sell
• 16:27
  Speaker 2: the whole world. But because of that, there is this
• 16:31
  Speaker 2: idea that okay, you know, oh my my man would
• 16:35
  Speaker 2: never no, no, no, not sis. That's not necessary, right,
• 16:41
  Speaker 2: Like I'm not painting all men with a broad brush,
• 16:45
  Speaker 2: nor am I painting all women with a broad brush
• 16:47
  Speaker 2: I'm just saying that relationships are very complicated. People have
• 16:52
  Speaker 2: understandings and arrangements within their relationships that we don't know
• 16:55
  Speaker 2: nothing fucking about. People forgive each other, people make adjustments,
• 17:00
  Speaker 2: all those type of things. So the original start of
• 17:02
  Speaker 2: this conversation was monogamy. I am a monogamous person when
• 17:07
  Speaker 2: I'm in a relationship, and I do think though that
• 17:10
  Speaker 2: people can have successful relationships and successful arrangements. And I
• 17:15
  Speaker 2: know people that have successful arrangements that are not in
• 17:18
  Speaker 2: monogamous relationships. And I think the judgment of like, Okay,
• 17:23
  Speaker 2: you're non monogamous, is it all of a sudden you're
• 17:25
  Speaker 2: just like a crazy swinger who's fucking everybody, and like
• 17:28
  Speaker 2: you know, there's like saliva, you know, herpes and stuff
• 17:30
  Speaker 2: flying around.
• 17:31
  Speaker 4: And for some people maybe they are.
• 17:33
  Speaker 2: But there's also people who have just decided like this
• 17:36
  Speaker 2: is what I physically need and I would rather just
• 17:40
  Speaker 2: be honest with the person that I'm gonna be with
• 17:42
  Speaker 2: or not be with, then pretend and cheat or hurt someone.
• 17:46
  Speaker 1: No, absolutely, we one thousand percent agree there. Yeah, I
• 17:50
  Speaker 1: think when I answered the question about monogamy, I mean,
• 17:52
  Speaker 1: I still stand on the facts, and I stated but
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: I was definitely talking from my point of view and
• 17:57
  Speaker 1: dating it wouldn't work for me. But you are right,
• 17:59
  Speaker 1: there's plenty of people who are excelling in an open
• 18:03
  Speaker 1: relationship or open dialogue and whatever works for them.
• 18:06
  Speaker 3: And I totally agree. And I say this all the time.
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: You know, with social media in particular, all you see
• 18:12
  Speaker 1: is the highlight reel. Like I always say this. If
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: I post a picture, just know there was a hundred,
• 18:17
  Speaker 1: like three were the top that I posted on Instagram,
• 18:20
  Speaker 1: but ninety seven didn't make the cut. That's what relationships are.
• 18:24
  Speaker 1: When you see that moment, it's the highlight of that relationship.
• 18:28
  Speaker 1: And the unfortunate thing though, and I really, and I
• 18:31
  Speaker 1: mean social media really changed dating forever because now we're
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: in our phones and we're looking at other people's lives,
• 18:37
  Speaker 1: and it's hard for someone to be happy within their
• 18:40
  Speaker 1: own life because it's like, wait a minute, he took
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: her to or Bora for her birthday and you're just
• 18:46
  Speaker 1: bringing me to Applebee's. I need to mean, that's gonna
• 18:48
  Speaker 1: save me to borrow a Bora And you don't know
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: the backstory of anything, like he could have had a
• 18:52
  Speaker 1: baby by her sister and she said, like, who knows,
• 18:55
  Speaker 1: whatever the thing could be, Like you know, just whatever
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: the dialogue is, but the journey. So I always tell
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: people in particular, and I know a lot because like you,
• 19:04
  Speaker 1: I'll have real life married friends and in real life
• 19:06
  Speaker 1: relationship friends, and they all tell me the journey of
• 19:10
  Speaker 1: which they got how they got to where they are.
• 19:13
  Speaker 1: And I always say, talk to people in real life
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: because in real life, if you get you a real
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: life committed relationship that you respect, that you admire, talk
• 19:23
  Speaker 1: to them in real life and get the journey story,
• 19:25
  Speaker 1: because it's the journey that gets to the Instagram highlight
• 19:29
  Speaker 1: moment that you're so in love with. But without the journey,
• 19:32
  Speaker 1: they don't get there. And a lot of times, you know,
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: not making no decisions for anybody. But there's plenty of
• 19:39
  Speaker 1: relationships that I know, people love that have gone through
• 19:42
  Speaker 1: infidelity and just decided to stay together and that's their business.
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: Like I have no judgment, and I understand why a
• 19:49
  Speaker 1: woman would stay with her man, especially she has a family.
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: Many years ago, I remember I had a friend that
• 19:54
  Speaker 1: was married and she was going through some stuff with
• 19:56
  Speaker 1: her husband, and I remember one of her I never
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: forgot it because it's it's like so many years ago
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: and I and I was under at that term like
• 20:03
  Speaker 1: cheating is not negotiable. But her other friend, who was married,
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: said to her, do not let your do not let
• 20:09
  Speaker 1: the side chick get your husband. Don't let the side
• 20:13
  Speaker 1: chick get your family. Mm hmm. Don't you like you
• 20:17
  Speaker 1: guys work it out, because if you leave him with
• 20:20
  Speaker 1: your kids and now you give her exactly what she wants.
• 20:24
  Speaker 1: And I was, I remember, I was just like what.
• 20:28
  Speaker 1: But as I matured and got older and got more
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: married friends and more, I understand the mindset of a wife. Like,
• 20:35
  Speaker 1: first of all, if a if a woman is cheating,
• 20:39
  Speaker 1: if a woman's married, right and you're sleeping with her
• 20:41
  Speaker 1: husband and you know about her, and then you'd send
• 20:45
  Speaker 1: her a DM Well I was with your husband. Well
• 20:47
  Speaker 1: why was you and my husband? Like you know, like
• 20:50
  Speaker 1: like why did you even sleep with him if you
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: knew I existed? Well, I just want you to know
• 20:55
  Speaker 1: about your man, girl? What okay? Now I know? And
• 20:58
  Speaker 1: what oh you want me to him so you can
• 21:00
  Speaker 1: have the house and the home that he's paying for
• 21:02
  Speaker 1: for me? Why would I do that? So? I actually,
• 21:06
  Speaker 1: as I got older, I understand the mindset of wives
• 21:08
  Speaker 1: and are like, I'm not letting you girl. You got
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: a weekend, I got the year.
• 21:14
  Speaker 2: I think that it's each every situation is so different.
• 21:17
  Speaker 2: It's it's and that is something else that social media
• 21:20
  Speaker 2: I think makes very difficult, because what social media has
• 21:23
  Speaker 2: done is removed nuance completely the comment section you have,
• 21:29
  Speaker 2: it's hard to understand tone. You can say one thing
• 21:33
  Speaker 2: and mean nothing negative by it, and it be misconstrued
• 21:37
  Speaker 2: and chopped up into a million different things. I don't
• 21:41
  Speaker 2: I would never do this, and all of a sudden
• 21:42
  Speaker 2: it's ten thousand it means ten thousand other things. And
• 21:46
  Speaker 2: when it comes to like what you do, especially in
• 21:49
  Speaker 2: a serious relationship and especially in a marriage, it really
• 21:53
  Speaker 2: truly is no one else's business, right because and that's
• 21:57
  Speaker 2: why I say I don't like have been married. There
• 22:02
  Speaker 2: are a lot of things that I would do differently.
• 22:04
  Speaker 2: Now if I got married again, what would.
• 22:06
  Speaker 1: You do differently too?
• 22:08
  Speaker 2: I would be a much better communicator. I would definitely
• 22:11
  Speaker 2: be a much better communicator. I think a big part
• 22:14
  Speaker 2: of having any kind of serious relationship, whether it is
• 22:17
  Speaker 2: business partners, longtime friends, a life partner, if you have
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: you know, deep family roots, like having real conversations, not
• 22:29
  Speaker 2: necessarily transparent conversations, because for me, at least in my experience,
• 22:35
  Speaker 2: people that always want transparent conversations they don't have real
• 22:40
  Speaker 2: good intentions for you. It should be a natural exchange
• 22:44
  Speaker 2: of thoughts, of feelings, of tapping in to see where
• 22:49
  Speaker 2: you are, check ups, those type of things. And I
• 22:53
  Speaker 2: would just be a better communicator. I would be more
• 22:55
  Speaker 2: honest about what was important to me. I would be
• 22:59
  Speaker 2: definitely more vulnernerable. And and what I already practice in
• 23:04
  Speaker 2: my dating life now is if I have certain non
• 23:07
  Speaker 2: negotiables and someone says this is something that they want
• 23:12
  Speaker 2: or any of that, then I just like I just
• 23:14
  Speaker 2: turned the page on them being a potential romantic partner. Yeah,
• 23:18
  Speaker 2: Like I don't want kids. So if you want kids,
• 23:22
  Speaker 2: could you date a guy that already has kids? Yes?
• 23:25
  Speaker 2: But not not blanket Like, I'm not dealing with baby
• 23:28
  Speaker 2: mama drama. I what's like at all? Like zero percent,
• 23:33
  Speaker 2: It's never been my experience in life. I'm all starting today.
• 23:36
  Speaker 2: They so they have to be older kids, No, not necessarily,
• 23:40
  Speaker 2: And you have to be an active father, right.
• 23:43
  Speaker 1: So then mama going to be around if he acts
• 23:44
  Speaker 1: a father.
• 23:45
  Speaker 2: Joy, But I don't mind that though, Like what if
• 23:48
  Speaker 2: you have a good I think you should have a
• 23:49
  Speaker 2: good relationship with your ex. Yeah, and if you if
• 23:55
  Speaker 2: you don't, for whatever the reason, it's just not for me,
• 23:58
  Speaker 2: it's for someone else.
• 23:59
  Speaker 3: That's fair.
• 24:00
  Speaker 1: So yeah, it's.
• 24:01
  Speaker 2: No different than someone saying that they don't want to
• 24:02
  Speaker 2: date someone the has kids. Would you date someone who
• 24:04
  Speaker 2: has kids?
• 24:05
  Speaker 1: I would? I mean I wouldn't date. I wouldn't date
• 24:09
  Speaker 1: a lot of baby mamas, you know. I think that.
• 24:12
  Speaker 1: You know, I feel like.
• 24:14
  Speaker 4: Like you wouldn't date someone that has multiple.
• 24:16
  Speaker 1: No, because you don't know how to make good decisions
• 24:18
  Speaker 1: in life, just like how men judge women. I don't
• 24:21
  Speaker 1: know why they think women don't judge men in return.
• 24:24
  Speaker 1: And what I'm constantly thinking about and I'm quite sure
• 24:26
  Speaker 1: you think about this too. Once you get connected with
• 24:28
  Speaker 1: a person, unfortunately we're public figures. It just sucks right
• 24:31
  Speaker 1: at times because so now you have people, I'm like,
• 24:34
  Speaker 1: is the baby mama going to be like, well my
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: baby daddy day and Kendredge and the kid. I don't
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: want any of that, Like I don't. Nope, Nope, So
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: I would definitely, And I'll just think about like, Okay,
• 24:45
  Speaker 1: why you not with her?
• 24:46
  Speaker 3: What happened if it was like three kids and you.
• 24:49
  Speaker 1: Were married, or you know, one woman and you have
• 24:53
  Speaker 1: one kid, but if you come in, you can't come
• 24:55
  Speaker 1: to me, But like, you can't come to me with
• 24:58
  Speaker 1: three baby mamas. I don't even know. If I would
• 24:59
  Speaker 1: do two, it would probably have to be one woman
• 25:03
  Speaker 1: that you probably had children with, but two would be
• 25:05
  Speaker 1: max and I'm and I'm really stretching it with two.
• 25:08
  Speaker 3: Actually I wouldn't do too. You can have one baby mama,
• 25:10
  Speaker 3: that's it.
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: Yo, ex wife, not even a baby like an ex
• 25:13
  Speaker 1: wife or like yeah, because I'm not, you gotta And
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: then also, you know what's so funny? I remember before
• 25:19
  Speaker 1: I'm sorry, I just look at men that And I
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: could be wrong by this, but I have a theory
• 25:26
  Speaker 1: that men who have multiple baby mamas don't tend to
• 25:30
  Speaker 1: commit long because what I've learned from my show, the
• 25:33
  Speaker 1: number one reason why some men are still open to
• 25:36
  Speaker 1: marriage the men that are is because of children, Like
• 25:38
  Speaker 1: they want a legacy, like that's important to them and
• 25:41
  Speaker 1: they can't. Why did you make that face? But that's
• 25:44
  Speaker 1: the true joint, Like the legacy? What what do you
• 25:48
  Speaker 1: mean when I have some castles.
• 25:50
  Speaker 2: What are you passing on? Like God, such generational trauma
• 25:53
  Speaker 2: and bad hairlines beards that don't connect us. This legacy
• 25:58
  Speaker 2: is nonsense.
• 25:59
  Speaker 4: I can't damn what dude, what are you talking about?
• 26:03
  Speaker 1: There are people and I'm talking about lineage.
• 26:06
  Speaker 3: I am going to defend men for a second.
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: Please, It is a man's desire to leave something on
• 26:12
  Speaker 1: this earth when he's gone build something. And what what
• 26:17
  Speaker 1: is more's the paint chapels? Like what are you talking about?
• 26:21
  Speaker 1: So fair and fair enough? You don't have the mimmy spirit. Okay,
• 26:24
  Speaker 1: we can see this right, so that is fair and
• 26:27
  Speaker 1: there's no judgment. But there are some people who could
• 26:31
  Speaker 1: not imagine not having children.
• 26:33
  Speaker 4: That part I understand.
• 26:34
  Speaker 2: Okay. I know. I'm by the way, have children. Okay,
• 26:38
  Speaker 2: I'm not against having children. Who I love children. I'm
• 26:42
  Speaker 2: so glad that my brothers and sisters love making children
• 26:45
  Speaker 2: because I have a gaggle of nieces.
• 26:48
  Speaker 3: And you do refer to their children as a part
• 26:50
  Speaker 3: of their legacy.
• 26:51
  Speaker 2: But like, what legacy? What are you talking about?
• 26:54
  Speaker 1: I mean, you know, okay, I want to try and
• 26:58
  Speaker 1: I think, well, I hear this a lot, but I
• 27:00
  Speaker 1: just want to wrap this up so the men that
• 27:02
  Speaker 1: are that I find that call into my show, that
• 27:04
  Speaker 1: are like serious about marriage and really looking for that. Yeah,
• 27:08
  Speaker 1: they're the men who want to be a part of
• 27:10
  Speaker 1: their children's lives.
• 27:11
  Speaker 3: They want you know, they want a legacy. They want
• 27:13
  Speaker 3: a family, and that.
• 27:15
  Speaker 1: Is Can we just say they want a family?
• 27:17
  Speaker 2: No, they want a legacy though, like they say, no,
• 27:19
  Speaker 2: it's gonna talk about it.
• 27:22
  Speaker 4: No one's gonna remember your name.
• 27:24
  Speaker 1: That is not true. That's because listen, this is again
• 27:27
  Speaker 1: going back to what I said in the beginning. That's
• 27:29
  Speaker 1: because you are all these like you know, athletes.
• 27:34
  Speaker 2: It's listen, we are so full of ourselves. Okay, we
• 27:40
  Speaker 2: think we are the sun, the moon, and the fucking stars.
• 27:44
  Speaker 2: You are a person, and more than likely no one
• 27:50
  Speaker 2: is No one is writing songs about you. Okay, but
• 27:52
  Speaker 2: if we have children, because you want to be a
• 27:55
  Speaker 2: good parent and you want a family, and you want
• 27:59
  Speaker 2: to have that experience in this lifetime, this like legacy
• 28:03
  Speaker 2: live on shit, Oh you've done nothing in this life.
• 28:08
  Speaker 2: I'm going to pour into other people with kindness and
• 28:11
  Speaker 2: you want your lega. You want legacy. Build a family
• 28:14
  Speaker 2: of well rounded, kind young people. That's a legacy.
• 28:20
  Speaker 1: Okay, Well, let me just defend the average person right now.
• 28:23
  Speaker 2: That is what that is.
• 28:24
  Speaker 4: It's not about average or great, or rich or poor or.
• 28:27
  Speaker 2: Any of that.
• 28:27
  Speaker 1: But are you saying that?
• 28:28
  Speaker 2: So often? I hear men be like, I want a legacy.
• 28:31
  Speaker 1: You're not a good person.
• 28:33
  Speaker 2: What do you mean you want to bu I don't
• 28:35
  Speaker 2: want you to pass nothing on you do. What are
• 28:37
  Speaker 2: you talking about a legacy? If you want a legacy,
• 28:40
  Speaker 2: fix yourself, find a wife, and build a strong family unit.
• 28:46
  Speaker 2: Are you thinking about doing that or are you just
• 28:47
  Speaker 2: trying to have children? Because if you just trying to
• 28:49
  Speaker 2: have children, you don't want a legacy. You're making another
• 28:52
  Speaker 2: broken family. You're bringing children to this world who have
• 28:55
  Speaker 2: to struggle through you not being in the home. What
• 28:57
  Speaker 2: the fuck are you talking about? You? If you don't
• 28:59
  Speaker 2: have a wife, don't say the word legacy to me? Please?
• 29:01
  Speaker 2: Oh oh my god. Okay, castles and my name?
• 29:09
  Speaker 1: Okay, So no, listen. I understand what you're saying, and
• 29:12
  Speaker 1: you're very passionate about your point, and I understand your point.
• 29:15
  Speaker 2: You don't even watch your malls, John, I mean, Kno,
• 29:18
  Speaker 2: let's be serious like this.
• 29:20
  Speaker 4: This is such a silly coming.
• 29:21
  Speaker 1: No, no, but I will say this, But what I
• 29:22
  Speaker 1: am talking about when I'm talking about the men who
• 29:25
  Speaker 1: do want to get married, let's talk about that. And
• 29:27
  Speaker 1: that's what I was saying, Like, these are the men
• 29:28
  Speaker 1: that call me a legacy for them, Let's say if
• 29:31
  Speaker 1: their parents were married, and they like the father's a senior,
• 29:34
  Speaker 1: he's a junior. Like you know, this is little like
• 29:37
  Speaker 1: we're all the Michaels Like it's like, that's the progression.
• 29:41
  Speaker 1: It's like when I get older, my kid, I he
• 29:43
  Speaker 1: goes to my high school that I went to, or
• 29:45
  Speaker 1: who go to I went to Hampton University. There's a
• 29:47
  Speaker 1: lot of Hamptonians that they want their kids to go
• 29:50
  Speaker 1: to Hampton. This is where and this fulfills their life.
• 29:53
  Speaker 1: And I'm not going to challenge that desire. I think
• 29:57
  Speaker 1: that's not a bad thing to desire.
• 29:59
  Speaker 2: No don't.
• 30:00
  Speaker 4: I think it's a wonderful thing to desire. That's not
• 30:02
  Speaker 4: what I'm saying.
• 30:03
  Speaker 1: That sound like you thought it was.
• 30:04
  Speaker 2: I think the legacy is very silly, But I do
• 30:07
  Speaker 2: think that it's a wonderful thing to want a family,
• 30:11
  Speaker 2: to want a family, right to marry someone, to have
• 30:17
  Speaker 2: children with them, to stay together, to raise a family,
• 30:21
  Speaker 2: and like that family continues on, I think that's a wonderful,
• 30:24
  Speaker 2: wonderful thing. I would not be here if someone didn't
• 30:27
  Speaker 2: decide to do that. Yes, okay, so I agree with that.
• 30:32
  Speaker 2: But what I'm saying is there are men who will
• 30:36
  Speaker 2: be like, I want to have children, but don't talk
• 30:41
  Speaker 2: about the wife, marriage, family part, just to like, I
• 30:45
  Speaker 2: need to have kids to carry on my legacy. Yeah.
• 30:48
  Speaker 1: Well, Nick Cannon is a perfect example of that. You know,
• 30:50
  Speaker 1: he talked about how he had so many kids because
• 30:54
  Speaker 1: what he was going through. So willy use celebrities because
• 30:56
  Speaker 1: everybody knows what we're talking about when we see But
• 30:58
  Speaker 1: there's plenty of people that do. There's plenty of people
• 31:01
  Speaker 1: like that. So there's a lot of men, whether we
• 31:03
  Speaker 1: agree with it or not, that is important to them.
• 31:05
  Speaker 1: Like they want to pro create. They want to have
• 31:08
  Speaker 1: little John John and and and and and little Kenny
• 31:11
  Speaker 1: and and little Tommy. That's very important to them. And
• 31:15
  Speaker 1: obviously it's not that important to Joy.
• 31:18
  Speaker 2: No. I just don't think that you're starting a legacy.
• 31:20
  Speaker 2: I think you're making humans. Okay, there's like a very
• 31:24
  Speaker 2: big difference.
• 31:26
  Speaker 1: Okay, well, okay, just for clarity, what would be an
• 31:28
  Speaker 1: example of starting a legacy.
• 31:31
  Speaker 2: I think. I think legacy is very silly, Like I
• 31:33
  Speaker 2: think the whole concept is silly because I don't think
• 31:35
  Speaker 2: that we as I think we as humans have this
• 31:37
  Speaker 2: incredibly elevated god like mentality of ourselves that we are
• 31:42
  Speaker 2: just going to be remembered for generations and.
• 31:44
  Speaker 4: Our power is going to get passed on from so
• 31:46
  Speaker 4: on to.
• 31:47
  Speaker 2: So forth, and you know, five generations from now, they're
• 31:50
  Speaker 2: going to be talking about you know, Grandma Joy. They're not.
• 31:53
  Speaker 2: They're not gonna be talking about you. They don't care,
• 31:55
  Speaker 2: they're not. They're not gonna do it. They're not gonna
• 31:58
  Speaker 2: do it. But maybe one person, maybe one person will
• 32:01
  Speaker 2: say your name in two hundred years, Maybe one person
• 32:04
  Speaker 2: will be like.
• 32:05
  Speaker 4: Oh that was so and so, and that doesn't it
• 32:07
  Speaker 4: doesn't matter.
• 32:08
  Speaker 2: That's okay.
• 32:09
  Speaker 1: But this is where I challenge that. So I think
• 32:11
  Speaker 1: and the big spectrum of things. Yes, you're right, but
• 32:14
  Speaker 1: when I think they're talking about legacy, it's about their
• 32:16
  Speaker 1: family unit within their unit, right, So it's not about
• 32:20
  Speaker 1: the world knowing them. It's about Grandma's recipe that in
• 32:23
  Speaker 1: our family, Grandma is our queen, she's our Beyonce, and she.
• 32:28
  Speaker 4: Got to have a family to do that.
• 32:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah, we have to say if you don't have a family, again,
• 32:33
  Speaker 2: you're just making little people.
• 32:36
  Speaker 1: So family is not created unless you're married.
• 32:38
  Speaker 2: No, no, no, no, no, no no again. I think we're
• 32:41
  Speaker 2: talking about two different people here. Okay, I'm talking about
• 32:44
  Speaker 2: the person who's just out here populating the earth, right,
• 32:48
  Speaker 2: not not raising, not putting together a legacy. Like, just
• 32:52
  Speaker 2: because you've made a person doesn't mean that you have
• 32:54
  Speaker 2: a legacy.
• 32:55
  Speaker 1: You're talking about future. What you keep putting names on people?
• 33:01
  Speaker 2: Do you think? I don't? I mean, it's not about celebrities.
• 33:06
  Speaker 2: There's so many non celebrities that do this. This is true.
• 33:09
  Speaker 1: Okay, you're right.
• 33:10
  Speaker 2: And I have this conversation with men a lot because
• 33:13
  Speaker 2: for whatever reason, I look like a reader, and people
• 33:16
  Speaker 2: like will argue with me about having kids.
• 33:18
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, No, you would be a wonderful woman for
• 33:20
  Speaker 1: a man to have kids with.
• 33:21
  Speaker 4: No, I wouldn't be a terrible person.
• 33:23
  Speaker 1: Well you don't want I under what I'm making is
• 33:26
  Speaker 1: I understand why a man would want to get you pregnant.
• 33:29
  Speaker 2: I don't.
• 33:30
  Speaker 4: I don't why.
• 33:31
  Speaker 3: Okay, let me break it down. First of all, you're.
• 33:33
  Speaker 2: Well no, no, no, Once I've initially sure, right, the process
• 33:38
  Speaker 2: seems fun. There's other persons, but like once I've said
• 33:43
  Speaker 2: I don't want children, there couldn't be anything less appealing
• 33:46
  Speaker 2: about me if you are someone who wants children.
• 33:50
  Speaker 3: No, absolutely, right, But however there's many follow ups.
• 33:53
  Speaker 1: Right, absolutely, But I'm saying the reason of the wise
• 33:56
  Speaker 1: first of all, to get Joy Taylor pregnant and to
• 34:00
  Speaker 1: say that I have a baby by Joy Taylor, and
• 34:02
  Speaker 1: no other man can say that. Do you know how
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: many men would pay boogoo money just to say I
• 34:08
  Speaker 1: have a baby by Joy Taylor?
• 34:10
  Speaker 2: How much we're talking there's there's no amount of money,
• 34:15
  Speaker 2: there's no amount of money.
• 34:16
  Speaker 1: But no, I just want you to understand. I understand
• 34:19
  Speaker 1: the desire why a guy would want to have a
• 34:20
  Speaker 1: baby by you.
• 34:21
  Speaker 2: Absolutely, that's so, that's not such a disgusting that.
• 34:24
  Speaker 1: I get what. I get both sides of the court.
• 34:26
  Speaker 1: I get how you're discussed by that. Well, actually I
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: don't get that part.
• 34:30
  Speaker 2: Why why it would be no, no, no, no, I'm not discussed.
• 34:35
  Speaker 2: They're gonna clut this up like and say I am
• 34:38
  Speaker 2: an insane person, but I love children. I just don't
• 34:42
  Speaker 2: want to have them. I think it's great to have children.
• 34:46
  Speaker 2: I just don't want to have them. I think it's
• 34:48
  Speaker 2: great to want a legacy. That's not true. I think legacy.
• 34:52
  Speaker 2: I think it's great to want a family and to
• 34:55
  Speaker 2: pass things on and recipes and all that.
• 34:57
  Speaker 4: I think all this stuff is great. It's not for me.
• 34:59
  Speaker 2: And I I think that if you aren't actually building
• 35:01
  Speaker 2: a family, and you're just making children so that in
• 35:03
  Speaker 2: your brain your genes live on because you think you're special,
• 35:06
  Speaker 2: it's fucking nuts. And there's not a legacy, and it is.
• 35:09
  Speaker 2: It's total bullshit. And I don't I as much as Nya,
• 35:13
  Speaker 2: don't want my own children. We talk about your show,
• 35:17
  Speaker 2: people wanted to come on, get married, have relationships. Do
• 35:22
  Speaker 2: you think that people still want to get married though?
• 35:25
  Speaker 1: Oh absolutely, But they don't want marriage. They want the wedding.
• 35:28
  Speaker 1: They want the wedding, they want the ring, they want
• 35:30
  Speaker 1: the proposal. They want to brag to their friends. But
• 35:33
  Speaker 1: I don't think a lot of women really want the
• 35:35
  Speaker 1: job description of a wife.
• 35:37
  Speaker 2: Do you think that men want the job description of
• 35:40
  Speaker 2: a husband.
• 35:41
  Speaker 1: They want the benefits of a husband, but they don't
• 35:43
  Speaker 1: also want the job description of a husband either. I
• 35:45
  Speaker 1: think a lot of people see we got to go
• 35:47
  Speaker 1: back to where I tell everybody throw away the Grandma
• 35:51
  Speaker 1: and Grandpa's dating book. We do not live in that
• 35:54
  Speaker 1: world anymore. As may will just say, that was when
• 35:56
  Speaker 1: dinosaurs were walking there. If that's how drastically for it is.
• 36:00
  Speaker 1: So let's go back to when marriage was high. First
• 36:03
  Speaker 1: of all, marriage was almost like a job for women.
• 36:06
  Speaker 1: They couldn't get jobs, so your husband was your job. Right,
• 36:09
  Speaker 1: You had nowhere to go. It wasn't socially acceptable to
• 36:13
  Speaker 1: have children and not be with the guy you had
• 36:15
  Speaker 1: kids with, right, so or in you didn't have money
• 36:18
  Speaker 1: to go anywhere. So whatever he was doing, he was doing,
• 36:21
  Speaker 1: and you.
• 36:22
  Speaker 3: Just made your peace with it.
• 36:24
  Speaker 1: And you were able to make your peace with it
• 36:26
  Speaker 1: any way you wanted to because you didn't have the
• 36:28
  Speaker 1: social media embarrassment. You didn't have the side check posting
• 36:32
  Speaker 1: on Facebook like Johnny's here tonight, and now you gotta
• 36:35
  Speaker 1: deal with everybody knowing that your man is with her
• 36:38
  Speaker 1: on Thursdays and not with you, right, so all the things.
• 36:42
  Speaker 4: Yeah, hopefully he just got lost up so you and
• 36:43
  Speaker 4: you got his pension.
• 36:44
  Speaker 1: Yeah, or you know, it was the down South when
• 36:46
  Speaker 1: I was like, if somebody was in everything was down
• 36:49
  Speaker 1: south if you were in jail, if the baby daddy
• 36:51
  Speaker 1: the he's down south, that's just what you can You
• 36:53
  Speaker 1: left it at that down south there, Oh I'm come Connecticut.
• 36:56
  Speaker 1: Oh they're in Charlotte somewhere. You're like, you know, that's
• 36:58
  Speaker 1: just what the story you told. We have progressed so far,
• 37:03
  Speaker 1: and our progression has, you know, decline marriages.
• 37:07
  Speaker 3: It's just kind of what it is. One women are
• 37:10
  Speaker 3: doing better.
• 37:11
  Speaker 1: They can financially stay, so, I mean, they can financially
• 37:14
  Speaker 1: support themselves. So you know, Big Mama probably would have
• 37:20
  Speaker 1: left too, she had the funds, you know, and if
• 37:22
  Speaker 1: society would accept it, but you know, it is what
• 37:25
  Speaker 1: it is. I was thinking about this because I'm so
• 37:27
  Speaker 1: excited about Brandy and Monica, right and and I know
• 37:31
  Speaker 1: all these ladies that I'm about to talk about, so
• 37:32
  Speaker 1: there's no disk But you know, I.
• 37:34
  Speaker 3: Grew up with Brandy and Monica.
• 37:36
  Speaker 1: And I remember when Brandy was pregnant, she had to
• 37:38
  Speaker 1: say she was married, Like she could not just be like,
• 37:41
  Speaker 1: I'm pregnant because Brandy was black. Cinderella, You're you're pregnant.
• 37:46
  Speaker 1: First of all, she was pregnant at a certain age,
• 37:48
  Speaker 1: so that was one thing. But she had to be
• 37:50
  Speaker 1: married for society to accept her. Right, Look where we
• 37:54
  Speaker 1: are now, who I adore Cardi b going through a
• 37:57
  Speaker 1: divorce and marry and pregnant by another man while she's
• 38:00
  Speaker 1: literally pregnant by somebody else. But we're like, go girl,
• 38:04
  Speaker 1: I love y'all'll fit you look great. Like it goes
• 38:06
  Speaker 1: to show you how different our society has changed. And
• 38:10
  Speaker 1: I have to say this, I love all the women
• 38:12
  Speaker 1: I just spoke about, So it wasn't a disc to
• 38:14
  Speaker 1: any woman. It's just an observation of where we are.
• 38:17
  Speaker 1: And the observation is important because when marriages were high,
• 38:21
  Speaker 1: a lot of the things that supported it are no
• 38:24
  Speaker 1: longer legitimate reasons. And also social media, like our world
• 38:30
  Speaker 1: is smaller before you had like your grandmother had to
• 38:33
  Speaker 1: be the baddest woman in her town, in her black
• 38:36
  Speaker 1: in the high school, like all she had to be right,
• 38:39
  Speaker 1: she'd have to she didn't have to compete with women
• 38:41
  Speaker 1: all around the world. That is not what we're dealing with.
• 38:44
  Speaker 1: Men have phones, We have dating apps. I own a
• 38:47
  Speaker 1: dating app.
• 38:48
  Speaker 3: You're swiping, you're meeting people.
• 38:50
  Speaker 1: You could be in Atlanta and be like, maybe maybe
• 38:52
  Speaker 1: my future is in Houston, or you know you're in
• 38:55
  Speaker 1: New York, like, oh okay, my wife might be in Miami.
• 38:57
  Speaker 1: Like the success of my show is those are circumstances. Literally,
• 39:01
  Speaker 1: people that gotten married for my show are people that
• 39:03
  Speaker 1: would have never met in any other arena. Like one
• 39:07
  Speaker 1: was in the first marriage. The girl was in Charlotte,
• 39:11
  Speaker 1: the man was in Miami. Then I had a guy
• 39:13
  Speaker 1: that got married. He was in California, his wife was
• 39:15
  Speaker 1: in Philly. You know, so our world got smaller with
• 39:20
  Speaker 1: social media, so everyone's feeling like they have so many options.
• 39:24
  Speaker 1: But this is where I know you don't like it,
• 39:26
  Speaker 1: but this is where the kid hook, and the kid
• 39:30
  Speaker 1: has always been the hook, right, kid in money has
• 39:32
  Speaker 1: always been a lot of hook for marriages because it's like, listen,
• 39:37
  Speaker 1: we got these kids together. It is what it is.
• 39:39
  Speaker 1: We got to work through this stuff because I'm not
• 39:41
  Speaker 1: gonna support these kids without you, and you get to
• 39:44
  Speaker 1: live your best single life. But for people who do
• 39:47
  Speaker 1: still take pro creating children and raising them in a
• 39:51
  Speaker 1: family unit, they still really desire marriage. For them, it's
• 39:55
  Speaker 1: still really important because they can't imagine anybody else. Like
• 39:59
  Speaker 1: the men that I know that are married, like they
• 40:02
  Speaker 1: love their wives, but ultimately It's like they could not
• 40:05
  Speaker 1: imagine somebody else taking care of their kids like that.
• 40:09
  Speaker 1: To them is like absolutely never can another man, you know,
• 40:13
  Speaker 1: be the man that my kids wake up to and
• 40:16
  Speaker 1: do all the things for. And Ladies, if you want
• 40:19
  Speaker 1: to get married and you those are the men you
• 40:21
  Speaker 1: should focus on. Focus on the men, not joy because
• 40:25
  Speaker 1: she doesn't want to have kids. But if you want
• 40:26
  Speaker 1: to have kids, so okay, let me have that part
• 40:28
  Speaker 1: to it. There are plenty of men who agree to that.
• 40:32
  Speaker 1: They agree to let's have a family, have a home,
• 40:35
  Speaker 1: and have children together. They might not all be tall,
• 40:37
  Speaker 1: they might not all be rich, and they might not
• 40:40
  Speaker 1: all be fine. Let me add that because I'm talking
• 40:42
  Speaker 1: about a character attribute, not a physical attribute. And this
• 40:46
  Speaker 1: is another thing that gets people really messed up because
• 40:50
  Speaker 1: women in particular are focusing on physical attributes first and
• 40:54
  Speaker 1: then substance attributes second, like the character second, and you're
• 40:59
  Speaker 1: you're never gonna in that way. There's so many women
• 41:01
  Speaker 1: who are married who don't have the best sex with
• 41:04
  Speaker 1: their husband, you know, like they're just they're I mean,
• 41:07
  Speaker 1: they probably have okay sex, but they're not like jumping
• 41:11
  Speaker 1: on like ceilings and things of this nature. They're just
• 41:14
  Speaker 1: having Okay, now.
• 41:15
  Speaker 2: That sounds horrible. Who wants to do all that? But
• 41:19
  Speaker 2: do I want Trump on ceilings? Oh, there's plenty of people.
• 41:22
  Speaker 1: There's some men that have been so entertained that it's
• 41:26
  Speaker 1: hard to please them in that way, but not to
• 41:28
  Speaker 1: go off tangent. So I think people make compromises, like, well,
• 41:32
  Speaker 1: you have.
• 41:32
  Speaker 2: To make compromises. I think it's it's different for me.
• 41:36
  Speaker 2: I don't want kids. I've been married, I've had the wedding,
• 41:41
  Speaker 2: So I think I don't I try to remove what
• 41:45
  Speaker 2: I need and what I want from what a lot
• 41:48
  Speaker 2: of people are going through because I realize that it's
• 41:50
  Speaker 2: very different for me. Where I would one hundred percent
• 41:53
  Speaker 2: agree with you is the idea of marriage is almost
• 41:59
  Speaker 2: always is better than the reality of marriage for people,
• 42:04
  Speaker 2: because the truth about marriages is that it's a choice.
• 42:09
  Speaker 4: It's not something you have to do.
• 42:11
  Speaker 2: It's not something that you have to stay in especially anymore.
• 42:16
  Speaker 2: And it's not like having a child, where okay, you
• 42:21
  Speaker 2: will always be a parent, even if.
• 42:23
  Speaker 4: You're not raising them. Somewhere in this.
• 42:26
  Speaker 2: World, you have a child that is yours, that is
• 42:29
  Speaker 2: your DNA that you created, even if you have nothing
• 42:32
  Speaker 2: to do with them, it doesn't erase the fact that person,
• 42:35
  Speaker 2: that human exists. So you're picking a partner, and you
• 42:40
  Speaker 2: have to pick them when you don't like them. You
• 42:42
  Speaker 2: don't have to pick them when they don't smell good.
• 42:44
  Speaker 2: You have to pick them when they're sick. You have
• 42:46
  Speaker 2: to pick them when they're down, you have to pick
• 42:48
  Speaker 2: them when they're irritating you, like you have to all
• 42:51
  Speaker 2: when the sex isn't good, when you're not having sex
• 42:53
  Speaker 2: at all. And that is what going in a long
• 42:56
  Speaker 2: relationship is about. It's about making compromises all the time.
• 43:00
  Speaker 2: You're always having to meet in the middle or not
• 43:03
  Speaker 2: at all, and you're gonna have fights and you're gonna
• 43:05
  Speaker 2: have to get over it and you're gonna have to forgive,
• 43:06
  Speaker 2: and you're gonna have to stay. And the glamour of
• 43:09
  Speaker 2: marriage is that it's a choice.
• 43:14
  Speaker 4: And to me, actually that's the most beautiful.
• 43:16
  Speaker 2: Part of marriage is that through all of those things
• 43:20
  Speaker 2: that in any other situation you would leave a business,
• 43:24
  Speaker 2: a friendship, sometimes even family, you are continuing not because
• 43:28
  Speaker 2: you have to, but because you want to choose this
• 43:31
  Speaker 2: person and you both decided that's what you're going to do,
• 43:35
  Speaker 2: and you both stick with that, and obviously there are
• 43:40
  Speaker 2: you know, circumstances that you cannot get over and cannot forgive.
• 43:44
  Speaker 2: But marriage is not contextualized like that. It's sold as
• 43:49
  Speaker 2: a status symbol. It's sold as you know, a really
• 43:53
  Speaker 2: fun Instagram journey.
• 43:55
  Speaker 4: You know, it's sold as glamour and then when it
• 44:00
  Speaker 4: when it hits people that it is it can be.
• 44:03
  Speaker 2: Those things, and there are moments of those things, but
• 44:05
  Speaker 2: there's also way more moments, moments of every day, not
• 44:09
  Speaker 2: those things. You have to be able to do that,
• 44:12
  Speaker 2: like that is what I don't think people who are
• 44:14
  Speaker 2: married emphasize enough for people.
• 44:17
  Speaker 1: Yeah, well it goes back to what you said earlier
• 44:19
  Speaker 1: about married people and people in relationships obviously don't share
• 44:24
  Speaker 1: everything right, right, And this is why I said, always
• 44:26
  Speaker 1: gets you real life married friends, so you get the
• 44:29
  Speaker 1: real life journey of marriage. You know, it was interesting
• 44:32
  Speaker 1: because you was once married. So I always say my
• 44:34
  Speaker 1: teacher with marriage was when I was engaged many years
• 44:37
  Speaker 1: ago out of college college sweetheart, and the one decision
• 44:42
  Speaker 1: that me and my ex made was if we got married,
• 44:44
  Speaker 1: we would never get divorced. And I really love that
• 44:47
  Speaker 1: that was our decision because it caused us to take
• 44:50
  Speaker 1: it serious and taking it serious. And when I always say,
• 44:53
  Speaker 1: you know, he was an amazing guy, no infidelity, Like
• 44:57
  Speaker 1: he was an awesome man, but we had a different life.
• 45:00
  Speaker 1: And the lesson and learning somebody would have to give
• 45:04
  Speaker 1: up their individual desire for the unit to work. And
• 45:07
  Speaker 1: normally that's the woman. Normally the woman compromises and she
• 45:11
  Speaker 1: you know, Okay, we're going to go on the guy's journey.
• 45:13
  Speaker 1: At this time, I'm young in radio, Like my career
• 45:15
  Speaker 1: is so unpromising. I'm making like seven dollars an hour.
• 45:17
  Speaker 1: He's electrical engineer. He had a probably still doing that
• 45:20
  Speaker 1: to this day. You know who knows had a great job.
• 45:22
  Speaker 1: So it would make sense outside looking in, you give
• 45:25
  Speaker 1: up your dream and you have this family. And I
• 45:28
  Speaker 1: couldn't do that. And it taught me like it's like,
• 45:31
  Speaker 1: oh okay, marriage isn't just about the wedding day.
• 45:34
  Speaker 3: It's not just about love.
• 45:36
  Speaker 1: And I talk about marriage so much on my platform
• 45:38
  Speaker 1: and I just want to say this, Like my best friend,
• 45:40
  Speaker 1: who's also your really good friend, is married. I so
• 45:44
  Speaker 1: support their marriage. I have a lot of friends who
• 45:46
  Speaker 1: marriages that I support. I think marriage is a beautiful
• 45:50
  Speaker 1: thing if it's done in the right way, right, if
• 45:52
  Speaker 1: it's what a person that you really love and enjoy.
• 45:56
  Speaker 1: But I have to we have to talk about there
• 45:58
  Speaker 1: are a lot of people who are unappily man like
• 46:01
  Speaker 1: they like, you know, like there's a lot of women.
• 46:03
  Speaker 1: I have a therapist and you know, obviously due to confidentiality,
• 46:07
  Speaker 1: she doesn't ever tell me, you know, conversations, but she
• 46:10
  Speaker 1: makes it clear, like she's a lot of clients of
• 46:13
  Speaker 1: wives who are just trying to make it through the week,
• 46:16
  Speaker 1: you know, for whatever reason, compromising what they had to
• 46:20
  Speaker 1: give up to become a wife, maybe not being happy
• 46:23
  Speaker 1: being a mother, you know, some resentment that their husband
• 46:27
  Speaker 1: is still able to flourish as she holds it down.
• 46:30
  Speaker 1: So that's why I say that a lot of women
• 46:33
  Speaker 1: want that show off moment of someone chose me, they
• 46:38
  Speaker 1: gave me a ring. Girl, choose yourself, Like I said
• 46:40
  Speaker 1: as before, I'm gonna pick me because I pick me
• 46:43
  Speaker 1: before you pick me. Like I don't need a man
• 46:45
  Speaker 1: to validate my existence with a jewelry. I not not
• 46:50
  Speaker 1: to talk my shit, but I'll buy it myself if
• 46:52
  Speaker 1: I just want to ring. Right, that's just a symbol, right,
• 46:56
  Speaker 1: But people get lost in that valid from a man,
• 47:01
  Speaker 1: And I'm like, that's a scary space because if you
• 47:04
  Speaker 1: don't know how to validate yourself, you are going to
• 47:07
  Speaker 1: be a lost somebody because now that love is predicated
• 47:11
  Speaker 1: on another person's idea of you. And here's the truth
• 47:15
  Speaker 1: of the matter. Everyone's not getting married, Like we're not
• 47:18
  Speaker 1: on a planet where you know, everyone doesn't get married.
• 47:21
  Speaker 1: And then people that get married, there's a high probability
• 47:23
  Speaker 1: just from statistics you may get a divorce. So you
• 47:27
  Speaker 1: can't let marriage define who you are as a woman.
• 47:32
  Speaker 1: And I still support marriage, so I don't want to
• 47:34
  Speaker 1: get anything wrong with that. I one thousand percent support marriages,
• 47:38
  Speaker 1: but I don't think it's necessary for your validation.
• 47:41
  Speaker 4: Do you still believe in romance?
• 47:44
  Speaker 3: Yeah, but what do you mean like romance?
• 47:47
  Speaker 1: In what way?
• 47:48
  Speaker 4: Are you a romantic still?
• 47:50
  Speaker 2: Because you you deal with first of all, if you've
• 47:53
  Speaker 2: never seen Kendri's show, if you've never experienced energy singles
• 47:59
  Speaker 2: lives highly encourage you. You get some some pretty wild
• 48:05
  Speaker 2: people from time to time, you get some amazing people
• 48:07
  Speaker 2: as well, but you get some deluluze as well. And
• 48:13
  Speaker 2: you know sometimes, I mean I can admit this as well,
• 48:16
  Speaker 2: like I am sometimes not the best with romance, Like
• 48:20
  Speaker 2: I feel like I need to appreciate it more. And
• 48:24
  Speaker 2: maybe I'm just like a little callous, but I feel
• 48:27
  Speaker 2: like some it's it's how much how do I want
• 48:32
  Speaker 2: to say this not get canceled. Maybe it's harder for
• 48:37
  Speaker 2: men to be romantic because they're with all of the
• 48:41
  Speaker 2: stuff on the internet these days. It's like if you
• 48:43
  Speaker 2: do anything nice for women, you're like a simp, you know.
• 48:47
  Speaker 2: And it's like the simple things like not buyer a Bentley,
• 48:50
  Speaker 2: like write a little poem or a little note, you know,
• 48:54
  Speaker 2: like little things like that, you know what.
• 48:56
  Speaker 1: I believe a romance. I mean, every man I've ever
• 48:59
  Speaker 1: dated has always is been romantic. I'm a giver too,
• 49:02
  Speaker 1: Like I enjoy giving, Like you know, I received amazing gifts.
• 49:08
  Speaker 1: I've given amazing gifts. That's just a part of my cloth, right.
• 49:11
  Speaker 1: And I think that real men, I use the word candidly,
• 49:16
  Speaker 1: they don't care about that simp. No shit, Like real
• 49:18
  Speaker 1: men know it is they take pride and to be
• 49:22
  Speaker 1: able to do for their women because their woman is
• 49:25
  Speaker 1: a reflection of them. So the way they're really looking
• 49:27
  Speaker 1: at it is no, I want you to look good
• 49:29
  Speaker 1: because you're representing me. So as good as you look
• 49:32
  Speaker 1: is as good as I look. That's how a real
• 49:34
  Speaker 1: man looks at it. They don't care any man calling
• 49:37
  Speaker 1: a man a simp is a broken guy. And maybe,
• 49:39
  Speaker 1: to his defense, let me not call him broken. Maybe
• 49:42
  Speaker 1: he got taken. Maybe he once gave into a girl
• 49:46
  Speaker 1: that broke his heart, and now he has this car,
• 49:50
  Speaker 1: you know, like he's probably dealing with his own accord.
• 49:53
  Speaker 1: But men who are givers and take pride, they want
• 49:59
  Speaker 1: their woman to look good. They want to. I have
• 50:01
  Speaker 1: friends who husbands aren't flashy, but buy them flashy things
• 50:06
  Speaker 1: all the time.
• 50:10
  Speaker 2: So you're a gift you're you're I am.
• 50:13
  Speaker 1: I'm a great Let me tell you something. I'm a
• 50:14
  Speaker 1: great gift giver to the point.
• 50:16
  Speaker 2: I listen, I love great I love gifts, but that
• 50:20
  Speaker 2: is not my I wish. I actually wish getting gifts
• 50:23
  Speaker 2: was my love language.
• 50:26
  Speaker 1: I'm really good at it too, because I'm a I'm
• 50:28
  Speaker 1: a good gift giver.
• 50:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah, oh I'm not gonna gift receiver. Oh I can
• 50:34
  Speaker 2: do both well. I can do both well.
• 50:37
  Speaker 3: I can receive very well and I can give very.
• 50:42
  Speaker 1: But you know, I've been receiving gifts from like since childhood,
• 50:45
  Speaker 1: my dad spilled me so like from from like literally
• 50:50
  Speaker 1: from childhood, like my father really set the tone and
• 50:53
  Speaker 1: literally like I mean, as I got older, the desires
• 50:56
  Speaker 1: got bigger. So when I was a little kid, it
• 50:58
  Speaker 1: was like, he buy me all the like remember that gem.
• 51:01
  Speaker 1: It's truly outrageous. So I got all the gems, I
• 51:04
  Speaker 1: got all the barbies. At that time, it wasn't that
• 51:07
  Speaker 1: it wasn't that expensive to spoil me. As I got older,
• 51:09
  Speaker 1: they got a little bit more challenging. But no, I've
• 51:13
  Speaker 1: been I'm accustomed to receiving gifts, but I also enjoy giving.
• 51:18
  Speaker 1: And sometimes I think about gifts I've given to past
• 51:21
  Speaker 1: men I've dealt with, and I'm like, but I'm But
• 51:24
  Speaker 1: at the same time, I'm like, no, what, I'm happy
• 51:27
  Speaker 1: I gave that because it was from the heart.
• 51:29
  Speaker 3: And I give really good, like thoughtful gifts.
• 51:32
  Speaker 4: I'm a I'm a great gift giver.
• 51:34
  Speaker 2: I really like to especially if I know, like you
• 51:37
  Speaker 2: really want something or if it's something like really unique.
• 51:41
  Speaker 2: I'm good. I'm good at that.
• 51:42
  Speaker 1: I like to do that.
• 51:43
  Speaker 4: But I'm just not.
• 51:44
  Speaker 2: I I am, and it is to my detriment. I
• 51:48
  Speaker 2: am in words of information girly and it's terrible.
• 51:50
  Speaker 1: Oh so you ope, that's good, that's cheap.
• 51:52
  Speaker 3: No, exactly, he could just tell you are you lackly today?
• 51:55
  Speaker 1: Exactly?
• 51:56
  Speaker 4: That's all I need. And it is such an affliction.
• 51:59
  Speaker 1: That's good too. I know that you know there's something
• 52:02
  Speaker 1: wrong with that.
• 52:03
  Speaker 4: It's terrible.
• 52:04
  Speaker 2: And what if they don't mean it, and they sometimes
• 52:06
  Speaker 2: they don't, well they always mean. They always mean when
• 52:09
  Speaker 2: they say it. Lookod, I mean, let's be serious. But
• 52:11
  Speaker 2: the other stuff though, the other stuff.
• 52:13
  Speaker 1: What's the other stuff?
• 52:14
  Speaker 2: Like?
• 52:14
  Speaker 1: I love it.
• 52:15
  Speaker 2: I mean, I think it's tough because I just am
• 52:19
  Speaker 2: very susceptible to I'm a talker, like I want to talk.
• 52:24
  Speaker 2: So when you when you like say, like I mean
• 52:27
  Speaker 2: the movies or what is that quit Charlotte that scene
• 52:33
  Speaker 2: where he but oh my god, you need a man
• 52:37
  Speaker 2: that like I could die, anyone could say I would die.
• 52:40
  Speaker 1: I want the man that got that that makes you
• 52:43
  Speaker 1: not talk like you just so Smith that joy ain't
• 52:47
  Speaker 1: got no word to say. Think about this. You know
• 52:49
  Speaker 1: what I thought about the truth.
• 52:50
  Speaker 2: This is it.
• 52:50
  Speaker 1: I really thought about this. Y'all know how much I
• 52:52
  Speaker 1: love Beyonce, right, and Beyonce to me is like queen
• 52:55
  Speaker 1: of all, like boss, all those things. And I was thinking, besides,
• 52:59
  Speaker 1: on stage, every time I see her with jay Z,
• 53:02
  Speaker 1: she's not really talking like every time I see like
• 53:05
  Speaker 1: and this is, you know, one of the most powerful
• 53:08
  Speaker 1: women on the planet right hands down, this is not
• 53:12
  Speaker 1: a debate. But when she's with her man, she is
• 53:17
  Speaker 1: very demure. Like I really thought about it. I was like,
• 53:20
  Speaker 1: I don't think I've ever really seen Beyonce talk as
• 53:23
  Speaker 1: much when she's with Jay unless they're on stage and
• 53:26
  Speaker 1: they're performing. So I say that I want to find
• 53:29
  Speaker 1: I want you. That's the kind of man I want
• 53:30
  Speaker 1: for you. I want the kind of man because, like
• 53:32
  Speaker 1: you said, you like to talk that when you're with him,
• 53:35
  Speaker 1: Joy's just sitting there, just sitting pretty, don't got no
• 53:39
  Speaker 1: words to say because she's just with her man. That's
• 53:42
  Speaker 1: the kind of man I want for you. The man
• 53:44
  Speaker 1: that can shut you up.
• 53:50
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I mean, if he's out there, he's out there,
• 53:54
  Speaker 2: he's out there.
• 53:55
  Speaker 1: I believe he's out there.
• 53:56
  Speaker 4: That's a tough Russell.
• 53:57
  Speaker 1: Nah, But he's gonna be a man that's gonna be
• 53:59
  Speaker 1: so hapfident because.
• 54:01
  Speaker 2: Confidence is very key with me. Though. I love a
• 54:04
  Speaker 2: confident man like Of all the attributes that you can
• 54:07
  Speaker 2: have as a man, confidence is by far the sexiest
• 54:11
  Speaker 2: to me because if you are and not arrogance, like
• 54:15
  Speaker 2: there is a sense that a really confident man has
• 54:19
  Speaker 2: like that. I'm obsessed with that.
• 54:22
  Speaker 1: Yeah, Like he's gonna be confident, he's gonna be obviously
• 54:26
  Speaker 1: strong in his own rights and accord, and he's he's
• 54:29
  Speaker 1: gonna be like, girl, I got this.
• 54:31
  Speaker 2: Can you just said, Where's where's Joy's husband? I'm sick
• 54:34
  Speaker 2: of listening to her?
• 54:34
  Speaker 1: No, no, no, I don't think. Okay, first of all,
• 54:36
  Speaker 1: I don't think you have to get married. Who said
• 54:38
  Speaker 1: it has to be a marriage?
• 54:39
  Speaker 2: That's true? I don't. I don't necessarily think that. I
• 54:41
  Speaker 2: don't know I would get married again.
• 54:42
  Speaker 1: Though you would get married again, I would.
• 54:44
  Speaker 4: I mean, it's gonna take that man you're talking about.
• 54:48
  Speaker 2: Na.
• 54:48
  Speaker 1: See, I'm the opposite.
• 54:49
  Speaker 2: I'm not.
• 54:49
  Speaker 1: I don't. I don't have to get married.
• 54:51
  Speaker 4: I don't have to get married either.
• 54:52
  Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, yeah, you have a you have a card game?
• 54:55
  Speaker 2: I do, okay, Kendricks car game. But we'll splice in
• 55:01
  Speaker 2: the photo.
• 55:03
  Speaker 4: Okay, So you I.
• 55:05
  Speaker 1: Have so the way it works, and we're gonna do
• 55:07
  Speaker 1: a girls, and I enjoy We'll be there. So it's
• 55:09
  Speaker 1: it's three categories of questions, tell me the truth, turn
• 55:12
  Speaker 1: me on risky business, and then there's shot glasses and
• 55:17
  Speaker 1: you don't want to question, and I'm so well you
• 55:19
  Speaker 1: can do a watershop and I'm mad. I don't have
• 55:21
  Speaker 1: the card game in person, but I do know some
• 55:23
  Speaker 1: of the questions that I'll ask Joy to see so
• 55:26
  Speaker 1: and tell me the truth. One of the questions is,
• 55:29
  Speaker 1: have you ever bought a plane ticket for a guy?
• 55:32
  Speaker 4: For sure? You you flew.
• 55:34
  Speaker 1: A guy out? Do you know about broke penish?
• 55:38
  Speaker 4: Of course I know about this?
• 55:39
  Speaker 2: What do you mean? Then?
• 55:40
  Speaker 1: Why was you acting?
• 55:40
  Speaker 2: Like?
• 55:41
  Speaker 3: Where did broke penas come from?
• 55:43
  Speaker 2: No?
• 55:43
  Speaker 4: No, no, I'm looking for them now, Oh girl, I
• 55:46
  Speaker 4: don't can find.
• 55:47
  Speaker 1: They gotta side an nda now like back then.
• 55:50
  Speaker 4: No, I used to be a huge trick. Of course
• 55:52
  Speaker 4: I did.
• 55:53
  Speaker 1: You did.
• 55:54
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's lovely, it's so nice. I do enjoy it.
• 55:57
  Speaker 4: I'm retired now, don't don't ask me if.
• 56:00
  Speaker 1: Okay, we gotta get the details on this. So how
• 56:03
  Speaker 1: did you do it? Like this is not a secret.
• 56:05
  Speaker 2: I've talked about this so.
• 56:06
  Speaker 1: Much that you bought plane tickets? I mean Why couldn't
• 56:10
  Speaker 1: you buy his own plane ticket?
• 56:14
  Speaker 2: Because he doesn't.
• 56:14
  Speaker 4: They don't.
• 56:15
  Speaker 2: They didn't like to work.
• 56:16
  Speaker 1: Oh why, oh my god, I'm sure.
• 56:24
  Speaker 4: I mean that's I've paid rents? Like, yeah, you paid rent? Yeah?
• 56:29
  Speaker 1: Joy, when did you pay somebody's rent? Girl, you do
• 56:32
  Speaker 1: move like a guy. We've talked about this off the record,
• 56:36
  Speaker 1: and you definitely.
• 56:37
  Speaker 2: Move like anyone who knows me well has said that
• 56:40
  Speaker 2: sentence to me. I gotta tell you, it makes.
• 56:43
  Speaker 1: Me proud, It makes you proud.
• 56:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's such a compliment.
• 56:47
  Speaker 1: Tell me why.
• 56:47
  Speaker 2: I mean, I really passionately feel like I want to
• 56:53
  Speaker 2: do everything that men do, okay, as a woman, like
• 56:57
  Speaker 2: I love being a feminine woman. I love it so much.
• 57:01
  Speaker 2: But I am also defiant bitch, and and I don't
• 57:05
  Speaker 2: I don't care how that sounds. Like. I anything you
• 57:09
  Speaker 2: can do, I can do better. I wasn't expecting Joy
• 57:13
  Speaker 2: to say she paid it. Guys right before, I'm not
• 57:15
  Speaker 2: doing it anymore.
• 57:16
  Speaker 1: No, I would say, there, they're gonna, they're gonna big penises,
• 57:20
  Speaker 1: are about to be all of your d ms, and
• 57:22
  Speaker 1: they're gonna say, listen, I'll do I'll do whatever you
• 57:26
  Speaker 1: want me to do. My wrists only eight hundred dollars eight. Yeah,
• 57:31
  Speaker 1: if he lives like in Alabama. I don't think is
• 57:34
  Speaker 1: that much in Alabama? Shots Alabama? This is not a
• 57:37
  Speaker 1: tis Okay, Okay, Okay, Well I wasn't expected to answer
• 57:41
  Speaker 1: that question.
• 57:42
  Speaker 4: There's another question.
• 57:43
  Speaker 1: So you got two options.
• 57:44
  Speaker 2: He's attractive but broke, or he's has he's not attractive.
• 57:49
  Speaker 4: But attractive and he has money so attractive it broke.
• 57:53
  Speaker 1: And then not attractive but has money like broke broke,
• 57:56
  Speaker 1: I mean you have to pay rent and fly. I'm
• 57:58
  Speaker 1: out he can't keep up with it like he has.
• 58:01
  Speaker 4: I think I think we throw around broke a little
• 58:03
  Speaker 4: bit too much.
• 58:03
  Speaker 2: Like, just because you don't make the same amount of
• 58:05
  Speaker 2: money as me does not mean that you're broke.
• 58:07
  Speaker 1: Okay, So let me make it more joy Taylor. Yeah
• 58:09
  Speaker 1: see I just did that. Let me tailor it to joy?
• 58:11
  Speaker 1: Has anybody ever did that before? Thousands on the first
• 58:16
  Speaker 1: Let me tailor this to joy to chink? Okay. So
• 58:20
  Speaker 1: if he doesn't have enough money to afford to date you,
• 58:24
  Speaker 1: so that means all the things that you do, you
• 58:25
  Speaker 1: have to always pay for his ticket, pay for the
• 58:28
  Speaker 1: food because he's not at that financial Okay, Okay, he's attractive,
• 58:31
  Speaker 1: but now he has enough money to do all the
• 58:34
  Speaker 1: things that you do. But you don't find him attractive.
• 58:37
  Speaker 2: But I don't find him attractive, or like other people
• 58:39
  Speaker 2: don't find him attractive you he's not attractive.
• 58:42
  Speaker 4: Oh no, I mean I wouldn't date someone that man.
• 58:46
  Speaker 2: That's tough. I don't know. Let me think about this.
• 58:48
  Speaker 1: You could take a shot. This is the moment you
• 58:49
  Speaker 1: would take a shot, because it's one thing.
• 58:52
  Speaker 2: I would date someone who doesn't make the same amount
• 58:55
  Speaker 2: of money as me, Like that doesn't matter. But if
• 58:57
  Speaker 2: you have to still have to be able to like
• 59:00
  Speaker 2: live your life, like I don't not have to pay
• 59:02
  Speaker 2: your bills.
• 59:03
  Speaker 1: Well, no, the thing is you travel right, so again,
• 59:07
  Speaker 1: because it's your life, you don't you don't understand the difference.
• 59:09
  Speaker 1: And most of the people in your life live this way.
• 59:11
  Speaker 1: But the average person can't just fly use in London,
• 59:15
  Speaker 1: like to listen.
• 59:16
  Speaker 2: Listen, little's not Marins when not like.
• 59:21
  Speaker 1: No, so that like this is what I'm saying. So
• 59:23
  Speaker 1: the way that you go to London or Paris or not.
• 59:27
  Speaker 2: All the men that I date can do that.
• 59:29
  Speaker 1: So you have to pay for him everywhere he goes.
• 59:31
  Speaker 1: But there's a guy that can't afford to do all
• 59:33
  Speaker 1: those things. But he's just not attractive.
• 59:37
  Speaker 4: These aren't I mean, can we get a middle like
• 59:40
  Speaker 4: he can do some of them.
• 59:41
  Speaker 1: None, you become a nun, you get the black uniform.
• 59:45
  Speaker 4: I mean, I can't do the uniform or the sex thing.
• 59:48
  Speaker 2: I guess I would say attractive and broke because I
• 59:51
  Speaker 2: couldn't be with someone that I'm genuinely not attracted to. Now,
• 59:55
  Speaker 2: what I will say is, now I just couldn't be
• 59:58
  Speaker 2: with someone I'm not attracted to.
• 59:59
  Speaker 3: Yeah that's fair, that's fair.
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm trying to twist the game. But yeah, let's
• 1:00:03
  Speaker 2: play the game. So I could not be with someone
• 1:00:05
  Speaker 2: that I'm not attracted to. So I'll say I'll take
• 1:00:07
  Speaker 2: I'll take brokies. Okay, you can live with me.
• 1:00:09
  Speaker 3: Okay. Other than sex, what's another way a man could
• 1:00:12
  Speaker 3: turn you on?
• 1:00:13
  Speaker 2: Be smart?
• 1:00:15
  Speaker 1: Oh?
• 1:00:15
  Speaker 2: Wow, smart turns you on? Be smart, be smart, be kind.
• 1:00:21
  Speaker 2: I find like really well rounded men very attractive.
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 4: I like when someone.
• 1:00:30
  Speaker 2: And not smart in that like I'll watch this podcast,
• 1:00:32
  Speaker 2: watch my podcast, but no, like really is someone who
• 1:00:38
  Speaker 2: values intellect, who values learning, who reads books? You know,
• 1:00:45
  Speaker 2: I am someone who likes to learn new things. So
• 1:00:49
  Speaker 2: I don't want someone who thinks they know everything, and
• 1:00:52
  Speaker 2: you don't have to be you know, have like a
• 1:00:54
  Speaker 2: PhD or something, but just like be curious and know
• 1:00:58
  Speaker 2: when you speak, know what you are talking about. Like that,
• 1:01:00
  Speaker 2: A smart person is very attractive to me. And kind
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 2: men are so attractive, like just thoughtful, sweet people that
• 1:01:11
  Speaker 2: like go out of the way for other people, not pushovers,
• 1:01:14
  Speaker 2: kind like they treat they just do things when no
• 1:01:18
  Speaker 2: one's watching that you can tell that they have like
• 1:01:22
  Speaker 2: a sweetheart because like that to me is very masculine.
• 1:01:26
  Speaker 2: A man who is like that's like a natural protector.
• 1:01:30
  Speaker 2: To me is somebody who is like taking care of
• 1:01:32
  Speaker 2: other things, who is doing things without being asked, who
• 1:01:36
  Speaker 2: is looking out for other people, you know, just the
• 1:01:39
  Speaker 2: little things that to me is really that's sexy.
• 1:01:42
  Speaker 1: I love that just to kind of piggyback. Confidence is
• 1:01:47
  Speaker 1: my number one attribute that to me, I mean most men,
• 1:01:52
  Speaker 1: and usually men who are very successful or confident, because
• 1:01:55
  Speaker 1: you have to become but I love confidentent and I
• 1:01:58
  Speaker 1: love men who are good in their own skin and
• 1:02:00
  Speaker 1: can't be manipulated by like if a man had called
• 1:02:03
  Speaker 1: them a simp, Like what what you think is a
• 1:02:05
  Speaker 1: sip I think is amazing. I'll bring this one question up,
• 1:02:08
  Speaker 1: but I'm not sure. I may more have but you
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 1: answered it earlier. But there's a question in the card game.
• 1:02:13
  Speaker 1: Could you date a guy who's kids you don't like
• 1:02:17
  Speaker 1: or baby mama you don't like? Could you date that
• 1:02:20
  Speaker 1: guy you already said no earlier.
• 1:02:22
  Speaker 2: Kids?
• 1:02:22
  Speaker 1: Well, well, I think it's the kids. Well the question okay,
• 1:02:25
  Speaker 1: well there's one. It's it's the babies. Well tell her
• 1:02:28
  Speaker 1: to this. There's one question that says, could you Okay,
• 1:02:31
  Speaker 1: you like this guy, but none of your fans, none
• 1:02:34
  Speaker 1: of your fans, none of your friends or family members
• 1:02:37
  Speaker 1: don't like him. Would you stay with him? You will
• 1:02:40
  Speaker 1: leave the guy?
• 1:02:41
  Speaker 2: No? Yes at this point in my life, absolutely, because
• 1:02:44
  Speaker 2: what I know about myself to be true is that
• 1:02:49
  Speaker 2: I can be manipulated. And if everyone else around me
• 1:02:54
  Speaker 2: is telling me that someone is not good, and especially
• 1:02:58
  Speaker 2: people who I know love me and I know have
• 1:03:02
  Speaker 2: seen me happy and I know really care about, like,
• 1:03:08
  Speaker 2: what's going to be good for me?
• 1:03:10
  Speaker 4: If they're all saying.
• 1:03:11
  Speaker 2: This ain't the one, There's something I'm not seeing because
• 1:03:15
  Speaker 2: in the past I have ignored that and I think
• 1:03:18
  Speaker 2: it was one of my therapists that described it to
• 1:03:21
  Speaker 2: me as like, sometimes people you only see people straight
• 1:03:24
  Speaker 2: on right, So people can wear a mask to you
• 1:03:28
  Speaker 2: and you can't see that they're wearing a mask because
• 1:03:30
  Speaker 2: they always keep you right in front of them, right
• 1:03:33
  Speaker 2: everywhere you turn, they're right in front of you, so
• 1:03:35
  Speaker 2: you never see the mask on the sides. But everyone
• 1:03:37
  Speaker 2: else can see that this person is wearing a mask
• 1:03:40
  Speaker 2: and is manipulating you. And that really resonated to me,
• 1:03:44
  Speaker 2: like that made sense as to why, like I can
• 1:03:48
  Speaker 2: like I'm like this person. I'm with them all the time,
• 1:03:51
  Speaker 2: Like I see them every day. I spend so much
• 1:03:53
  Speaker 2: time with them, Like how could I not see how
• 1:03:56
  Speaker 2: evil they were? And they that was how it was
• 1:03:59
  Speaker 2: described to me, because they always kept you in front
• 1:04:01
  Speaker 2: of them. They never let you see around to see
• 1:04:05
  Speaker 2: the mask they were wearing. But the people around you
• 1:04:08
  Speaker 2: who were saying like this person isn't good for you,
• 1:04:09
  Speaker 2: this person is this like this person is not being real,
• 1:04:13
  Speaker 2: they could see that. So knowing that that is a
• 1:04:16
  Speaker 2: blind spot for me. If if everyone in my life
• 1:04:19
  Speaker 2: that I know loves me, not randoms, not people who
• 1:04:23
  Speaker 2: could be haters, any of that, if everyone in my
• 1:04:26
  Speaker 2: life is telling me that this is this person is
• 1:04:29
  Speaker 2: not for me.
• 1:04:29
  Speaker 4: There's something I'm not saying.
• 1:04:32
  Speaker 1: I'm hard headed. I'd be having to go on a
• 1:04:33
  Speaker 1: journey until I get it to my me too.
• 1:04:35
  Speaker 2: But I've gone on those journeys and I've climbed the mountaintop.
• 1:04:39
  Speaker 2: I don't need to do it again.
• 1:04:40
  Speaker 1: I think that for me, when I fall in love,
• 1:04:42
  Speaker 1: I fall hard and then I have to fall out,
• 1:04:45
  Speaker 1: you know, of love, and that takes a while. But
• 1:04:48
  Speaker 1: you know I have I believe in psychic so I
• 1:04:50
  Speaker 1: have psychic Susan she's been on my show Psychics. Literally,
• 1:04:53
  Speaker 1: she's a medium psychic. I've been where she's been with
• 1:04:55
  Speaker 1: me for like ten years, and majority of the times
• 1:04:58
  Speaker 1: any guy I've ever dated, she will vet and sometimes
• 1:05:01
  Speaker 1: she'll see something in the beginning, I'm like, okay, we
• 1:05:02
  Speaker 1: can go past. Then we'll get to a point and
• 1:05:04
  Speaker 1: she's like, okay, no, and it will take me from
• 1:05:07
  Speaker 1: the moment she tells me almost a year to get
• 1:05:11
  Speaker 1: to where she was, and like she got there. She's
• 1:05:14
  Speaker 1: like she could see it. I mean, I stand by it.
• 1:05:16
  Speaker 1: I respect people who do not believe in psychics. I'm
• 1:05:19
  Speaker 1: not arguing, but there's a lot of people who don't,
• 1:05:21
  Speaker 1: and I don't have time to argue with you, like, no,
• 1:05:24
  Speaker 1: for real, I'm not mad at you. I'm not trying
• 1:05:26
  Speaker 1: to convince you of anything but what I'm telling you
• 1:05:30
  Speaker 1: my truth.
• 1:05:30
  Speaker 3: And she's been spot on.
• 1:05:31
  Speaker 1: But in this conversation of people telling you in evance,
• 1:05:36
  Speaker 1: and it's like she's like, well, I told you are ago,
• 1:05:38
  Speaker 1: I'm like, yeah, but I had to get to that
• 1:05:41
  Speaker 1: journey and understanding for myself.
• 1:05:43
  Speaker 3: That's just the way I'm wired.
• 1:05:45
  Speaker 1: I think now I'll be pretty like now that I'm
• 1:05:49
  Speaker 1: just dating different now, But I think now i'm a
• 1:05:52
  Speaker 1: little bit better. But I'm the hard headed person, like
• 1:05:56
  Speaker 1: everybody can see it, but until I see it, it
• 1:05:58
  Speaker 1: don't matter.
• 1:06:00
  Speaker 2: Yeah. See, I used to be that way very very deeply,
• 1:06:03
  Speaker 2: and I have just experienced enough to know that I
• 1:06:06
  Speaker 2: have no interest in going down that rabbit hole again.
• 1:06:10
  Speaker 2: And if i'm if I'm missing something, I'm missing it
• 1:06:15
  Speaker 2: and that's okay, And I don't it's not that, it's
• 1:06:18
  Speaker 2: like I just also don't believe that if someone's good,
• 1:06:22
  Speaker 2: that that would be the review. Like someone might be like,
• 1:06:25
  Speaker 2: you know what, I don't know if they're gonna last
• 1:06:27
  Speaker 2: because they can't keep up with you here or something,
• 1:06:29
  Speaker 2: but like they're a good person, they'll be kind to
• 1:06:31
  Speaker 2: you or whatever. Like that's different than everyone in my
• 1:06:34
  Speaker 2: life who cares about me, being like this is not
• 1:06:35
  Speaker 2: the one, like you don't need to keep them around.
• 1:06:38
  Speaker 2: That's very, very different. I would have to listen to that.
• 1:06:40
  Speaker 1: Right, that's fair. But what about the opposite, because I
• 1:06:44
  Speaker 1: remember when like this again, this is twenty years ago,
• 1:06:47
  Speaker 1: when I decided to like just pursue.
• 1:06:49
  Speaker 3: My dreams and not get married.
• 1:06:52
  Speaker 1: I remember my mother and my sister in particular, they
• 1:06:55
  Speaker 1: literally were like, you're making the worst decision ever, Like
• 1:06:58
  Speaker 1: they really thought that me decided, you know, because like
• 1:07:03
  Speaker 1: I said, the ex fiance was a great human. So
• 1:07:05
  Speaker 1: it was like, you have this great human and you're
• 1:07:07
  Speaker 1: about to go on this unknown journey. But I had
• 1:07:12
  Speaker 1: to honor who I was at my cloth. So it
• 1:07:14
  Speaker 1: can go both ways, because in that case, he was
• 1:07:17
  Speaker 1: a great guy. But to give up my life and
• 1:07:20
  Speaker 1: my dreams was no, I don't agree. I would. I
• 1:07:24
  Speaker 1: would make the same decision I made then, you know,
• 1:07:27
  Speaker 1: twenty years ago, still was still not being married and
• 1:07:29
  Speaker 1: not having kids. I would still make the same decision.
• 1:07:32
  Speaker 1: But I remember both my mother and my sister like
• 1:07:35
  Speaker 1: literally individually set me to the side. It was like,
• 1:07:38
  Speaker 1: this is not a good decision.
• 1:07:39
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and I've been in situations like that before as well,
• 1:07:41
  Speaker 2: But I think you have to trust your gut.
• 1:07:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and.
• 1:07:46
  Speaker 2: You know it's they're really just trying to protect you.
• 1:07:49
  Speaker 2: In both scenarios, are trying to protect you. But I
• 1:07:52
  Speaker 2: think at the ends, you have to make your own decisions.
• 1:07:56
  Speaker 2: And so if you were constantly being told those things like, hey,
• 1:08:01
  Speaker 2: you're giving up a good one, like you shouldn't do this,
• 1:08:02
  Speaker 2: Like that's different, then maybe they're like, hey, girl, like
• 1:08:07
  Speaker 2: if you want to if you want a long term relationship,
• 1:08:09
  Speaker 2: you might need to pick one of these good men
• 1:08:11
  Speaker 2: to keep passing up on. But I think one situation
• 1:08:14
  Speaker 2: or one isolated incident is different than You're right, Like.
• 1:08:17
  Speaker 3: If everyone's like he's this and that, listen.
• 1:08:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you have to get to it, or at least
• 1:08:21
  Speaker 2: you have to heed that and pay attention to what
• 1:08:23
  Speaker 2: they're I agree with that. So what's next for Kendrick.
• 1:08:25
  Speaker 1: G What's next?
• 1:08:27
  Speaker 2: Oh?
• 1:08:27
  Speaker 1: God?
• 1:08:27
  Speaker 3: So the great thing we have the card game?
• 1:08:29
  Speaker 1: Yes, and we are gonna be on a full tour
• 1:08:33
  Speaker 1: in twenty twenty six, and we are working on something
• 1:08:37
  Speaker 1: right now, Like I'm in the thick of it, but
• 1:08:40
  Speaker 1: I don't want to talk about it because I mean,
• 1:08:42
  Speaker 1: I think you know this from working in media, like
• 1:08:45
  Speaker 1: sometimes you want to just wait till all the ink
• 1:08:47
  Speaker 1: is drying. The ink.
• 1:08:49
  Speaker 2: The ink must be driving, they must be dry.
• 1:08:52
  Speaker 1: But I will say this, you know, I started, you know,
• 1:08:56
  Speaker 1: on radio and television and and pretty much that post
• 1:09:01
  Speaker 1: to come to the social media streets. And we have
• 1:09:04
  Speaker 1: some returns happening in twenty twenty six, so we'll leave
• 1:09:07
  Speaker 1: it at that. Exciting, Yes, it's exciting. Excited.
• 1:09:11
  Speaker 4: Well, this was so much fun.
• 1:09:12
  Speaker 1: Yes, it was so much fun. I didn't know what
• 1:09:14
  Speaker 1: to expect with joy, so I was like, but we
• 1:09:16
  Speaker 1: just literally talked for hour. We can talk about anything.
• 1:09:19
  Speaker 2: But it was like to go, I didn't. I didn't
• 1:09:21
  Speaker 2: get it's too hard.
• 1:09:23
  Speaker 1: No no, no, you were great.
• 1:09:24
  Speaker 4: Dot I put you on the spot with anything.
• 1:09:25
  Speaker 1: No no, no, you fog with nothing.
• 1:09:27
  Speaker 2: Follow Kendg on Instagram at Kenjuge Media. Can download the
• 1:09:31
  Speaker 2: Kenjag Singles app and the app store, and you can
• 1:09:34
  Speaker 2: purchase the hendred G Singles card game, which is very fun.
• 1:09:38
  Speaker 4: We're gonna have a girl's note.
• 1:09:39
  Speaker 2: To do it.
• 1:09:39
  Speaker 3: We're gonna have a girl's note to do it.
• 1:09:41
  Speaker 4: Other saucy. Those are pretty saucy.
• 1:09:42
  Speaker 1: Question, there's even there's even rhys. That's why I'm so
• 1:09:45
  Speaker 1: mad I don't have the game, because I would have
• 1:09:47
  Speaker 1: gave you the real.
• 1:09:48
  Speaker 4: Those were still really good though.
• 1:09:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:09:50
  Speaker 2: From Kenja g Singles Card game dot com, kenjug Singles
• 1:09:55
  Speaker 2: Card game dot com.
• 1:09:56
  Speaker 4: Follow her at Kendregi Media. Thank you so much for coming.
• 1:09:58
  Speaker 1: Now, thank you for having me. This is so joys
• 1:10:00
  Speaker 1: of the world.
• 1:10:02
  Speaker 2: Love chatting with Kendra. So glad you can come down
• 1:10:04
  Speaker 2: and hang out with us. Make sure you check out
• 1:10:06
  Speaker 2: her show. It is great and if you're single, maybe
• 1:10:08
  Speaker 2: you'll find your match on there.
• 1:10:10
  Speaker 4: It's time for Never Too Personal.
• 1:10:12
  Speaker 2: If you want to be a part of the show,
• 1:10:13
  Speaker 2: Too Personal Podcasts at gmail dot com, or you can
• 1:10:15
  Speaker 2: dm us at Too Personal Show. What is a holiday
• 1:10:19
  Speaker 2: boundary that you set that has changed your life? So
• 1:10:24
  Speaker 2: it is the holiday season and a lot of people
• 1:10:27
  Speaker 2: are going to be surrounded by family that they may
• 1:10:30
  Speaker 2: not see all year, or family that they have been avoiding.
• 1:10:34
  Speaker 2: And in these times you also have to think about
• 1:10:36
  Speaker 2: family that maybe doesn't share the same political or social
• 1:10:41
  Speaker 2: views that you have. One of the boundaries that I
• 1:10:44
  Speaker 2: enforce with really everyone in my life, but particularly with family,
• 1:10:49
  Speaker 2: is that you know, if you don't want none, won't
• 1:10:53
  Speaker 2: be none. So don't start with me. If you want
• 1:10:57
  Speaker 2: to introduce a conversation, be ready to have that conversation.
• 1:11:00
  Speaker 2: I don't think that everything needs to be brought up
• 1:11:03
  Speaker 2: at family dinners and family gatherings. That is my opinion.
• 1:11:07
  Speaker 2: You handle your family however you want to, but if
• 1:11:09
  Speaker 2: we are all together one time a year, this is
• 1:11:12
  Speaker 2: probably not the time to hash out that thing with
• 1:11:14
  Speaker 2: the family member that you're not getting along with. However,
• 1:11:18
  Speaker 2: if they want to bring something up, all right, it's
• 1:11:20
  Speaker 2: time to ruin the day. But I am not the
• 1:11:22
  Speaker 2: person who is going to initiate that conversation, not because
• 1:11:26
  Speaker 2: there aren't things that need to be discussed or settled,
• 1:11:29
  Speaker 2: but I do think that timing matters. So one of
• 1:11:33
  Speaker 2: the boundaries that I not only enforced for myself but
• 1:11:36
  Speaker 2: also enforced for other people is this particular thing does
• 1:11:40
  Speaker 2: not need to get hashed out while everyone is trying
• 1:11:42
  Speaker 2: to enjoy each other and enjoy time together and have
• 1:11:46
  Speaker 2: a peaceful gathering. And if there's something I really need
• 1:11:49
  Speaker 2: to get off my chest or I really need to
• 1:11:51
  Speaker 2: deal with I will deal with it after.
• 1:11:53
  Speaker 4: Or I will deal with it before.
• 1:11:54
  Speaker 2: But I'm not going to insists that my particular beef
• 1:11:58
  Speaker 2: get hashed out on that day unless someone wants to
• 1:12:03
  Speaker 2: bring it up and someone wants to hash it out
• 1:12:05
  Speaker 2: on that day, in which case we're doing it. And
• 1:12:08
  Speaker 2: I have done this many times before. I will walk
• 1:12:10
  Speaker 2: the line and I will play the role. But don't
• 1:12:13
  Speaker 2: think you're not going to pierce this situation and I'm
• 1:12:17
  Speaker 2: going to continue to turn the other cheek. I only
• 1:12:19
  Speaker 2: have two cheeks, and I'm only turning it once. The
• 1:12:23
  Speaker 2: other time it's a wrap, So that's one boundary. I
• 1:12:26
  Speaker 2: also have no problem not talking.
• 1:12:30
  Speaker 4: To people who I don't want to talk to.
• 1:12:33
  Speaker 2: If there is a significant enough beef and a significant
• 1:12:35
  Speaker 2: enough problem, I will be polite. I will say hello,
• 1:12:39
  Speaker 2: I will say hello to their guests, and then I
• 1:12:42
  Speaker 2: will continue to move around the room as such. Now
• 1:12:44
  Speaker 2: I have a huge family, so I'm able to kind
• 1:12:47
  Speaker 2: of get away with this by, you know, not having
• 1:12:50
  Speaker 2: to be front and center and continue on having conversations
• 1:12:53
  Speaker 2: with people that I'm not getting along with or don't
• 1:12:55
  Speaker 2: have a relationship with. But yeah, I'm not going to
• 1:12:58
  Speaker 2: fake the funk for a content in you this amount
• 1:13:00
  Speaker 2: of time, especially if everyone in the family knows I'm
• 1:13:03
  Speaker 2: not getting along with this person. I'm not draining myself
• 1:13:06
  Speaker 2: by having small talk or forcing myself to pretend like
• 1:13:09
  Speaker 2: I'm not in a bad spot with this person. So
• 1:13:12
  Speaker 2: those are two things that work for me. I know
• 1:13:14
  Speaker 2: everyone's family is very different, and everyone's family is very crazy.
• 1:13:17
  Speaker 2: And you know, I'm not really giving this as advice.
• 1:13:20
  Speaker 2: It's just more of an observation about how I handle
• 1:13:22
  Speaker 2: things and what has worked for me. But I know
• 1:13:24
  Speaker 2: the holidays can be stressful for a lot of people
• 1:13:27
  Speaker 2: because of these type of things, and especially now in
• 1:13:30
  Speaker 2: the times that we're living in. So the one piece
• 1:13:32
  Speaker 2: of the advice that I would give you is to
• 1:13:34
  Speaker 2: just protect your piece. You should be enjoying these times.
• 1:13:36
  Speaker 2: You should be enjoying your family. We don't all get
• 1:13:39
  Speaker 2: to spend time forever together, and every memory that you
• 1:13:43
  Speaker 2: have with your family or with your loved ones, you
• 1:13:46
  Speaker 2: don't want to be tainted with arguments. If you can
• 1:13:50
  Speaker 2: be the bigger person, or you can settle it at
• 1:13:52
  Speaker 2: another time, or if it's just not in you right
• 1:13:55
  Speaker 2: now to solve this thing. Protect your peace, like you
• 1:13:58
  Speaker 2: deserve to have a holiday, and you just serve to
• 1:14:00
  Speaker 2: have your moment as well, even if you are having
• 1:14:03
  Speaker 2: a problem with somebody else. So that's what works for me.
• 1:14:06
  Speaker 2: And the only piece of advice I have is protect
• 1:14:08
  Speaker 2: your piece, because you might take my advice and these
• 1:14:10
  Speaker 2: things get worse. But happy holidays, Enjoy your Thanksgiving, enjoy
• 1:14:15
  Speaker 2: your Christmas, enjoy your New Year's. This is a special
• 1:14:18
  Speaker 2: time of year as have that special something going on,
• 1:14:21
  Speaker 2: and I know it can also can be a very
• 1:14:22
  Speaker 2: hard time of year for people as well, So wishing
• 1:14:25
  Speaker 2: you the best of holidays. Thanks so much for joining
• 1:14:27
  Speaker 2: us on Too Personal. Make sure you hit subscribe and
• 1:14:30
  Speaker 2: follow us at Too Personal Show and we'll catch you
• 1:14:32
  Speaker 2: next time.