Latest / Deeply Well with Devi Brown / Effortless Representation with Joanna Simkin

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Effortless Representation with Joanna Simkin · Deeply Well with Devi Brown

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: MM from grandmothers who whispered in their baby girl ill
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: two fathers on dimly lit street corners, instructing young soldiers
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: to always keep their eyes open. You be queen, you
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  Speaker 1: were fired. You will pass through centuries on the hands
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  Speaker 1: of your daughters. They called you wisdom. Proverbs on the
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  Speaker 1: backs of diamond eyed school children who growing into hymnals
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  Speaker 1: recited by amethyst holding urban philosophers who recited neighborhood commandments
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  Speaker 1: out of the windows of restored ALCHEMYO cheriots to keep
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  Speaker 1: the warmth of their blood, be wise, be smart, being black,
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  Speaker 1: Opal Brown courts, bloodstone and prayer. Be every form of
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  Speaker 1: Jim se King told, scribe, scribe, told son, son, told wife, wife,
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  Speaker 1: told her daughter, and daughter told the as this is.
• 1:00
  Speaker 1: And the ancestors told me that you would come to
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  Speaker 1: give wisdom thousands. They said you would come Dropping Roping. Hey,
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: welcome back to the Dropping Jim's Podcast. As always, I'm
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: your host, Debbie Brown. First, I just want to say
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: thank you to everybody who listened to our last episode,
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: which is our episode on Purpose. I got so many,
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: so many d MS, emails, messages, um from people that
• 1:29
  Speaker 1: are really resonated with and I just thank you for
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: listening and being open to my thoughts on it and
• 1:35
  Speaker 1: information and it did. It created so much um feedback
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: and dialogue and so many like follow up questions that
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: I will be coming out with a part two in
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: the next couple of weeks, so that is on the
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: way for those that have been asking me, all right,
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: today's show. Super excited. My home girl is here and
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  Speaker 1: she is legitimately um what of to me, one of
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  Speaker 1: the most interesting people that I know. And she's also
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  Speaker 1: like so effortlessly chic and as soon as you hear
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  Speaker 1: her voice, it's a extra smoke. So I'm really excited
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  Speaker 1: to have my dear friend um who is now my
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  Speaker 1: neighbor on the show today celebrity makeup artist Joanna Simpkin. Hey, oh,
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  Speaker 1: and this is my Kathleen Turner voice. Yes, neighbor, so
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  Speaker 1: effortlessly sexy Joanna. So. Joanna is big time makeup artist.
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  Speaker 1: She has such a fascinating story, so many adventures. If
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  Speaker 1: you follow her on Instagram, I'm pretty sure you're obsessed
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  Speaker 1: with her. I have so many people that I'm friends
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  Speaker 1: with come up to me and like, wait, you know her, Like, well, yes,
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  Speaker 1: not only do I know her, but like we barbecue.
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  Speaker 1: That's better than what my husband gets, who gets everywhere
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  Speaker 1: from airports to planes to events. Are you Joanna Simpkin husband?
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  Speaker 1: He goes, yes, Yes, that is my official name. That
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  Speaker 1: that would be me exactly who I am. And you
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  Speaker 1: always seem a lot of like the Globe trekking on
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  Speaker 1: her stories, a lot of political commentary and then her
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  Speaker 1: beautiful daughter. No, well in case smush killing it on
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  Speaker 1: the ground. I love Smush Bear. So you do, like
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  Speaker 1: you do some of the biggest names in Hollywood. I do,
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  Speaker 1: And it's such it's so weird to hear like someone
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  Speaker 1: else like even introduce you as like popping because you're
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  Speaker 1: you know, you just go and you do the biggest names,
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  Speaker 1: and I'm like, oh, oh, I guess I do. I'm
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  Speaker 1: like not in a jaded way, like you just almost
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  Speaker 1: don't think of it like that when you're in it,
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  Speaker 1: do you know what I mean? You just kind of
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  Speaker 1: go and you get a booking and you work and
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  Speaker 1: you're running around and then like it's a normal day
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  Speaker 1: for you, and then yeah, maybe like there's a moment
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  Speaker 1: where you're with a client and all of a sudden
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  Speaker 1: you're like from the car to like the Late Night
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  Speaker 1: Show and there's five hundred people outside with like cameras
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  Speaker 1: and and you're like, oh, you're like famous, famous because
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  Speaker 1: like I forgot. Yeah yeah, but yes I do do
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  Speaker 1: some very very famous people. And I mean you do
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: like everybody like you do pop stars, you do actresses,
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  Speaker 1: you do rappers, you do designers, you do Um are
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  Speaker 1: you allowed to say your clients like do you? Yeah?
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  Speaker 1: I mean I work with I feel like a lot
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  Speaker 1: of people probably follow me on Instagram from like two
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  Speaker 1: big ones, which would be the Array Insane Malik Um,
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  Speaker 1: but yeah, Carrie Washington. UM. It's so funny because it's
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  Speaker 1: like sometimes I have to go through my Instagram. I'll
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  Speaker 1: be like, oh right, I totally I've worked with you.
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  Speaker 1: But yeah, I mean like from Amber Rose to UM.
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  Speaker 1: And sometimes I don't like to claim someone is my client,
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  Speaker 1: but like I've covered for other makeup artists doing their clients,
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  Speaker 1: like UM for Genomoney and people like that, Um you
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  Speaker 1: do you're away. Yeah, it's like, oh you just I'm
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  Speaker 1: like I just did her last week. I forgot. Um. Yeah.
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  Speaker 1: I mean it's even like male grooming, like I know
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  Speaker 1: you recently did Schoolboy que and other Previou and by
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  Speaker 1: the way, Charlotagne on the same shoot, the two of
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  Speaker 1: them together. Another previous guest, Yes, I worked with both
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  Speaker 1: of them. Yeah, Troy Savon, who's like a really big
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  Speaker 1: pop singer. I work with the Weekend Um you. I've
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  Speaker 1: done a lot of male grooming Jason Drulo Um And yeah.
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  Speaker 1: It's like sometimes like I might even have to go
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  Speaker 1: through like my agency's website and click through and be like,
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  Speaker 1: oh right, right, and oh yeah we worked together, and
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  Speaker 1: that's crazy. And recently you did that really iconic cover
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  Speaker 1: of Issa. Oh, the Essence cover. I feel like that
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  Speaker 1: was like the cover scene around the world. I feel like, Okay,
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  Speaker 1: I have like a huge respect for Essence just as
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  Speaker 1: an institution, and I feel like not that they were
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  Speaker 1: getting stale, but like you know, they're covered. They were
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  Speaker 1: putting a lot of the same people and the covers
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  Speaker 1: were in the same and then they hired a new
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  Speaker 1: editorial director, Muana Lou, and she I feel like has
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  Speaker 1: revamped the look of the magazine and it has such
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  Speaker 1: a different feel because I feel like that Issa cover
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  Speaker 1: like springboard, like those Less covers with like Sierra and
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  Speaker 1: Eman and Siana Taylor and this cover that came out
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  Speaker 1: like two days ago with Tracey Ells Ross that is
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  Speaker 1: like bonkers, like who was shot by the same photographer
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  Speaker 1: who shot Issa by the way, I tag it Jordan's.
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  Speaker 1: But I feel like, yeah, they've like they've sort of
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  Speaker 1: like breathe new life into the editorial essence and it's
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  Speaker 1: just a joy and a pleasure for I think like
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  Speaker 1: the whole aesthetic of like Black Girl Magic is really
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  Speaker 1: changing because I think like for a long time, especially
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  Speaker 1: with like essence or like ebony or like a jet
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  Speaker 1: even like the covers to me were more like like
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  Speaker 1: aimed at like the church audience, a little pageanty really
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  Speaker 1: like glossy, just very like you know, would be like
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  Speaker 1: a bright blue pantsuit or a lot of red blush.
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  Speaker 1: And yeah, I think like, um, those publications and photoshoots
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  Speaker 1: in general for black women weren't allowed to feel as
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  Speaker 1: fly and editorial, as like a Vogue or an Ell
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  Speaker 1: or a w Yeah you weren't. You weren't seeing the fashion.
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  Speaker 1: You weren't seeing like maybe like drama and beauty and
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  Speaker 1: the hair like that that you should be seeing for
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  Speaker 1: black women, and like the skin being highlighted properly. And
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  Speaker 1: I think like it's so important to make because it's like,
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  Speaker 1: you know, I've shotsa from multiple covers, and I've shot
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  Speaker 1: other black women for editorial, and I mean, there is
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  Speaker 1: just something to be said for being put in a
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  Speaker 1: lens and an eye of like booking like an Itasia
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  Speaker 1: Jordan to shoot it. Just like the photos of Issa,
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  Speaker 1: like Itasia saw her skin the way I do her skin,
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  Speaker 1: do you know what I mean, Like she didn't just
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  Speaker 1: sort of do like this generic lighting that they would
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  Speaker 1: do on like when we're sharing a cover with like
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  Speaker 1: three white ingenue actresses who all agreed in that lighting,
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  Speaker 1: and there's like no adjustment for Issa, so she just
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  Speaker 1: looks flat and whatever, Whereas like it, Tasia like saw
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  Speaker 1: her because it it Asia sees herself, you know what
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  Speaker 1: I mean. So it's just like the importance of like
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  Speaker 1: not that you have to be I mean I'm not black,
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  Speaker 1: but like not that you have to be black to see,
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  Speaker 1: but like to just have a respect and an understanding
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  Speaker 1: and to know to like make those tweaks and those
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  Speaker 1: changes can we And I really want to dive into
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  Speaker 1: that because you're not black, but you are very much
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  Speaker 1: I feel like you are very much entrenched in black
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  Speaker 1: girl magic culture. You know, I am you know, Okay,
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  Speaker 1: So I grew up in San Francisco, which if you
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  Speaker 1: live in San Francisco now or visited San Francisco now,
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  Speaker 1: you'd be like, and um, if you visited or lived
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  Speaker 1: in San Francisco in the eighties and nineties, you might
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: be like, oh, and it's so funny. I worked with
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  Speaker 1: that comedian here's another one, Ali Wong, who also grew
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  Speaker 1: up in San Francisco in the eighties and nineties, and
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  Speaker 1: we had this whole conversation about it was such a
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  Speaker 1: special time to grow up, um like in the Bay
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  Speaker 1: Area as far as just you know, for to Rachel
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  Speaker 1: dol Is all that to kind of weirdly be a
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  Speaker 1: little transracial, not to use that we'd word, but to
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  Speaker 1: just sort of just um, I think, to like really
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  Speaker 1: effortlessly flow and be comfortable. Um. San Francisco had such
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  Speaker 1: a magical mix at that time that I that is missing.
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  Speaker 1: And I don't know if you've seen that movie, Um,
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  Speaker 1: The Last Black Man in San Francisco. They kind of
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  Speaker 1: like addressed like that changing demographic that's happened in the
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  Speaker 1: Bay Area. But you know, I think that I just
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  Speaker 1: kind of it was like not an effort of mine.
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  Speaker 1: It was just like naturally when I that's how I
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  Speaker 1: grew up. It was my friends in high school, it
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  Speaker 1: was you know, I grew up in the Indies when
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  Speaker 1: like hip hop was like super popping, and like that
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  Speaker 1: was what was cool. And you know, I think, like,
• 9:05
  Speaker 1: you know, we're we're on the same age. And I
• 9:07
  Speaker 1: think like at our time, you were either listening to like,
• 9:10
  Speaker 1: you know, Nirvana and Pearl Jam, or you were listening
• 9:12
  Speaker 1: to like Biggie, and you know, I was listening to Biggie,
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  Speaker 1: and um, yeah, I think it just sort of like
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  Speaker 1: naturally flowed, but you know what to like more so,
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: I would say, and for that, you're absolutely right. Like
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  Speaker 1: I think if you grow up in a coastal city
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  Speaker 1: like a New York of San Francisco, Los Angeles, the
• 9:29
  Speaker 1: way that you experienced diversity is completely different than other places.
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  Speaker 1: You experience it in a very authentic, like I'm not
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  Speaker 1: even trying to experience it way, very like blended together
• 9:41
  Speaker 1: and like, yeah, I can't be in a room with
• 9:44
  Speaker 1: you and your husband and our mutual friends and like
• 9:47
  Speaker 1: not sort of like understand every facet of like lingo
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: and the cultural references and we're playing Taboo the other night,
• 9:55
  Speaker 1: and it's like even like the inner jokes, you know
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: what I mean, those things come natural when it's like
• 10:00
  Speaker 1: who you're naturally around, yeah, because you know, in cities
• 10:03
  Speaker 1: like that, it's really more like this dance, like this
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: beautiful merging um of cultures in every moment, Like for breakfast,
• 10:12
  Speaker 1: I might have American for lynch, I might have Korean
• 10:15
  Speaker 1: for dinner, I might have you know, Ethiopian like and
• 10:18
  Speaker 1: that's just like literally like m like when I'm sick,
• 10:24
  Speaker 1: I want like Hargao and I want like Schumai and
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: you know what I mean, Like I would do like
• 10:29
  Speaker 1: a Tommy Um soup when I'm sick. Yeah, Like but
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: it's like that's just crazy. That's like you're comforted with
• 10:34
  Speaker 1: someone that grew up you know, in Non Paso City there,
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  Speaker 1: you know, like Mom's chicken soup or like McDonald's or
• 10:40
  Speaker 1: you know what I mean, where that thing is that
• 10:41
  Speaker 1: makes them feel better, but they just weren't exposed to
• 10:44
  Speaker 1: so much other stuff. I was actually having this conversation
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: when I lived in Houston with someone and they were like,
• 10:50
  Speaker 1: what do you you know? Because I was always homesick
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: anywhere I've ever lived. That's not l a. I have
• 10:54
  Speaker 1: enjoyed my time, but I was always deeply homesick because
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: I met you when you lived in New York. That's
• 11:00
  Speaker 1: even in New York, which was like the pinnacle of
• 11:02
  Speaker 1: my career. I was like, I don't want to get here.
• 11:09
  Speaker 1: But one of my friends that I was talking to,
• 11:10
  Speaker 1: she's like, what do you miss most? And I was like,
• 11:11
  Speaker 1: I just missed the diversity And she was like, what
• 11:13
  Speaker 1: are you talking about. She was like, Houston is one
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  Speaker 1: of the top three most divert That was if you
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: guys heard them on the mic, that was the doorbell Um,
• 11:21
  Speaker 1: but that it's one of the most She was like,
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: Houston is one of the top three most diverse places
• 11:26
  Speaker 1: in the nation. And I'm like, yeah, in theory, like
• 11:28
  Speaker 1: Houston is it had so there was a huge like
• 11:31
  Speaker 1: Nigerian population, huge Indian population, huge Chinese population, but no
• 11:36
  Speaker 1: one was intermingling. So it's very much over here over here,
• 11:41
  Speaker 1: you over there, And it wasn't like an effortless mix
• 11:45
  Speaker 1: where the streets that I drive down, I'm seeing all
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: of this, the food that I'm eating, the people I'm
• 11:49
  Speaker 1: conversing with. You still have to go out of your
• 11:51
  Speaker 1: wed high. It's so funny. I always have that conversation
• 11:54
  Speaker 1: with people about Atlanta because when I say that there
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: are it's a struggle. Sometimes the like very diverse metropolitan cities.
• 12:02
  Speaker 1: People love to say, what about Atlanta, And I'm like, yeah,
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: Atlanta's got everybody, but they're super spread out and they
• 12:08
  Speaker 1: don't mix and it's got this weird like segregated field.
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: Still it still feels like, yeah, you know what I mean.
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  Speaker 1: You know what. One of my first experiences in Texas
• 12:18
  Speaker 1: when I was, um, this was two thousand and ten,
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: so this was like my first it was my first
• 12:23
  Speaker 1: time there. Um. One of my girlfriends was a club
• 12:26
  Speaker 1: promoter and she's Chinese and she was like, hey, let's
• 12:29
  Speaker 1: go to mixed club tonight. Yeah yeah, oh my god,
• 12:37
  Speaker 1: shout out to Candy Girl and she runs some nightlife.
• 12:42
  Speaker 1: Oh my goodness, listen, listen, we are days running the streets. Um.
• 12:48
  Speaker 1: So she like she was just like all right, girl,
• 12:50
  Speaker 1: Like she would always take me around and take me out,
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: and she was like, let's go to this mixed club.
• 12:54
  Speaker 1: And I was like, what's a mixed club. She was like, oh,
• 12:57
  Speaker 1: you know, it's like where everybody parties. Together, and I
• 12:59
  Speaker 1: was like, we just the like just a party, like
• 13:01
  Speaker 1: a club. We get to the door, right, so I'm
• 13:05
  Speaker 1: probably the guy had no idea what I was, but
• 13:08
  Speaker 1: I'm black, she's Chinese. And then he looks at he said, okay,
• 13:13
  Speaker 1: stand over here. He said, I just let some black
• 13:15
  Speaker 1: people in, so you gotta wait till some come out
• 13:17
  Speaker 1: until I can let you in. And he said it
• 13:20
  Speaker 1: like very nonchalantly like that, like it just was like,
• 13:23
  Speaker 1: hey guys, oh yeah, just down over here. As soon
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: as some black people leave, I'll let you in. What
• 13:27
  Speaker 1: in the world. And I remember, and this is like
• 13:29
  Speaker 1: two thousand and ten, and at that point I came
• 13:32
  Speaker 1: straight there from l A. I didn't know. I had
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: never I had never in my life heard anything like
• 13:37
  Speaker 1: that set out loud, and I was like ready to fight,
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: Like I was like what, Like I was like, what
• 13:44
  Speaker 1: is happening? And nobody was faced by it? And then
• 13:47
  Speaker 1: I was just kind of like, yeah, you know, I
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: mean every place is different. I never experienced like overt
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: racism there. I had a really great time in that city.
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: But there is still the way we look at diverse
• 14:00
  Speaker 1: the especially in non coastal areas, is just so deeply
• 14:03
  Speaker 1: different at the most fundamental of levels. Well, like, the
• 14:06
  Speaker 1: most interesting thing you said is that nobody was phased
• 14:08
  Speaker 1: by like that is just that's that's businesses. They're rude
• 14:12
  Speaker 1: at all, like I would be. You guys can't see
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: because it's my mouth. When she said that was on
• 14:17
  Speaker 1: the floor, like I have never I I honestly it
• 14:21
  Speaker 1: was like some of the biggest culture shock I had
• 14:22
  Speaker 1: ever experienced. And I wasn't used to beat people being
• 14:26
  Speaker 1: so split up into just certain And that's not to
• 14:30
  Speaker 1: say that doesn't happen obviously in in your New York's
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: and l A is like yes, like there are for sure,
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: um some lines in the sand everywhere that you go.
• 14:40
  Speaker 1: But yeah, So it's just it's just interesting the different
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: experiences you have, especially when you start seeing more of
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: the US and more of the world. I think it's
• 14:48
  Speaker 1: just like the effortlessness of it, like the that no
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: one like that. I would never walk into an event
• 14:54
  Speaker 1: in l A, New York or San Francisco in the
• 14:56
  Speaker 1: eighties and nineties and be like, I just let some
• 14:59
  Speaker 1: black people in, So I'm going to need you to
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: wait for a couple of minutes until I let someone
• 15:02
  Speaker 1: else in. First, like what in the world, girl, I
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: was like, take me home now, like we're done here,
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: We're done, burn this place down. No. I was just
• 15:15
  Speaker 1: so like, there's no way I could have said okay,
• 15:17
  Speaker 1: gotcha and stood there and then watched black people walk
• 15:20
  Speaker 1: out so I could walk in there, Like the irony
• 15:22
  Speaker 1: is that was the mixed club. That was that was
• 15:25
  Speaker 1: the whole point of the club. And so once I
• 15:28
  Speaker 1: got inside, what it really was was white people and
• 15:31
  Speaker 1: then five black people, and that was like a mixed club,
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: you know, and they would play like some hip hop
• 15:37
  Speaker 1: top like Nellie Yes, Yes, a lot of hot in
• 15:40
  Speaker 1: her lot and Nelly on the streets a lot of
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: right anyway, because you know, what I really wanted to
• 15:49
  Speaker 1: when I brought up the black girl magic thing, what
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: I really wanted to talk about was not just not
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: not just that obviously, like you are hip to so
• 15:57
  Speaker 1: many different um cultures and leaf systems, and and you
• 16:01
  Speaker 1: kind of are able to just beautifully and effortlessly flow
• 16:06
  Speaker 1: through all kinds of communities and and um just effortlessly
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: fit in and and share space. But more so like
• 16:15
  Speaker 1: you are one of those people like when people talk
• 16:17
  Speaker 1: about allies, like I think of you I think of
• 16:22
  Speaker 1: like Carly Hustle, like, like the woke that the two
• 16:27
  Speaker 1: of you are is just so inspiring and beautiful. And
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: it's not you're not trying, like you're just being a
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: decent human. You know. What's also interesting about that though
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: Carly Hustle also from northern California in the eighties and nineties,
• 16:39
  Speaker 1: it's a special place. But continue yeah, no, but and
• 16:43
  Speaker 1: so it's like you you do you work on so
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: many of Hollywood's like biggest, biggest black actresses, like some
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: of the biggest stars, some of the people that are
• 16:53
  Speaker 1: the front runners of our culture. And so it's like
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: it's just it's just very beautiful to see. And I
• 17:00
  Speaker 1: just wondered, really if you had any thoughts on it.
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: I am aware of it, like um, And I don't
• 17:05
  Speaker 1: mean I'm just like, oh yeah, I'm aware. I'm like, um,
• 17:09
  Speaker 1: intentionally aware of it. I mean, I'm intentionally aware of, um,
• 17:13
  Speaker 1: the responsibility of it. I'm aware also of like the
• 17:18
  Speaker 1: optics of like in a time when everyone's promoting black
• 17:21
  Speaker 1: girl magic and make your crew black, and I'm aware
• 17:24
  Speaker 1: that I'm like the white girl that's like let into
• 17:26
  Speaker 1: these spaces and hired by people that like really champion it,
• 17:30
  Speaker 1: and they like, you know, they kind of almost put
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: their credibility, as it were, on the line. Like you
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: have someone like an Issa who's like super like I'm
• 17:37
  Speaker 1: into hiring black women da da and like I do
• 17:39
  Speaker 1: her makeup and the rest of her team is black
• 17:42
  Speaker 1: and almost overwhelmingly women, you know what I mean. So
• 17:44
  Speaker 1: it's like, I, Um, it doesn't make many calculate, Like
• 17:48
  Speaker 1: I couldn't be calculated if I tried as far as
• 17:50
  Speaker 1: like what I present, but like I'm so aware and
• 17:53
  Speaker 1: I'm so sensitive, um to moments. It's so funny. I
• 17:57
  Speaker 1: was thinking the other day I was watching I work
• 18:01
  Speaker 1: with a stylist who's phenomenal. Often I worked at him
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: with Lisa. His name is Jason Rombert and he is
• 18:06
  Speaker 1: an amazing black stylist, which there are few of them
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: in Hollywood. Um, and they're amazing. It's like him, Jason
• 18:13
  Speaker 1: Bolden Wayman and Micah Law, Colin Carter. Yeah, I could
• 18:21
  Speaker 1: name you fifty white stylists. Um. And he has created
• 18:25
  Speaker 1: a fashion line called Elliotte And they had the runway
• 18:28
  Speaker 1: show yesterday was near a fashion week, and I was like,
• 18:31
  Speaker 1: I was invited to the show, which was amazing. I
• 18:33
  Speaker 1: couldn't attend I was here in l A because I
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: live in l A now and I'm your neighbor. Um,
• 18:37
  Speaker 1: and I and I saw he hired a makeup artist
• 18:40
  Speaker 1: who's a dear friend of mine who I love, Jessica
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: Smalls two key the show. Um, she's black, She's amazing.
• 18:47
  Speaker 1: She does you know money, that's who I covered general
• 18:49
  Speaker 1: money four. Um. She is phenomenal, so deserving aside from
• 18:53
  Speaker 1: the fact that she's black. And I know that he
• 18:55
  Speaker 1: intentionally was hiring like black people to to work the
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: show out. Um, And it's like, I think about these
• 19:03
  Speaker 1: moments where it's like, you know, she wrote like this
• 19:06
  Speaker 1: beautiful thing to him that said, you know I remember
• 19:08
  Speaker 1: us starting as assistants, And I was like, you know,
• 19:11
  Speaker 1: it's like, there's a part of me that could be like, well,
• 19:12
  Speaker 1: me and Jason started together as assistance to you know
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: what I mean. And I could be like, why why
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: wouldn't he call me to keep the show? You know
• 19:20
  Speaker 1: what I mean? Why would he give her? And I'm
• 19:21
  Speaker 1: also like a what's what's for you? Doesn't pass you by?
• 19:26
  Speaker 1: B I'm like, I so appreciate that he intentionally went
• 19:32
  Speaker 1: out of his way to be like, I'm sure he
• 19:34
  Speaker 1: looked at like his people as like who's going to
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: keep my show? And he's like, who black is going
• 19:40
  Speaker 1: to keep my show? Because that is important to me?
• 19:42
  Speaker 1: Do you know what I mean? And and it's almost
• 19:44
  Speaker 1: like like I have to be aware of of those
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: moments of not and I didn't feel like any like jealous.
• 19:51
  Speaker 1: I mean, I like teared up when I saw what
• 19:53
  Speaker 1: she wrote about it, like how he made her feel
• 19:55
  Speaker 1: when he asked her to do it, and I just
• 19:56
  Speaker 1: thought it was so beautiful and I was so proud
• 19:58
  Speaker 1: of her and she did an amazing job. And but
• 20:00
  Speaker 1: it's just like moments like that were like it's so
• 20:03
  Speaker 1: easy to to not live what you speak and to
• 20:06
  Speaker 1: just sort of feel a way because you weren't included
• 20:09
  Speaker 1: or you know, and and to be like and I
• 20:11
  Speaker 1: don't think that that's ally ship, Like what kind of
• 20:14
  Speaker 1: ally am I? If I'm like, well what about me?
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: I'm like, well, then that has that's nothing to do
• 20:17
  Speaker 1: with what you speak and what you actually feel. And
• 20:19
  Speaker 1: it's like I don't even feel that way, Like I
• 20:22
  Speaker 1: was so happy and proud to see him do that.
• 20:24
  Speaker 1: I'm so happy and proud when I see like Kalona
• 20:27
  Speaker 1: Barfield and Lane Walter Roth and and Lacy Redway and
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: Jason and Jessica and they're attending like special events being
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: put together during Fashion Week four Black Creatives because like
• 20:38
  Speaker 1: those things have been missing for so long, and it's
• 20:41
  Speaker 1: like what I scream about like every day basically with
• 20:45
  Speaker 1: That's what I promote is black girl magic and black
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: boy joy and all of it. And I love to
• 20:50
  Speaker 1: see everyone's supporting each other. It's not to say that
• 20:52
  Speaker 1: I don't want to get booked on things, you know
• 20:53
  Speaker 1: what I mean, But it's like I I love watching
• 20:57
  Speaker 1: it and I just honestly, I just feel like it's
• 20:58
  Speaker 1: an honor to be include it in this magic. It's like, um,
• 21:02
  Speaker 1: what's the quote, Like, um, God created black people in
• 21:06
  Speaker 1: Black people created style. I'm like, I'm just so honored
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: to be seen in that circle of like wow, she's
• 21:13
  Speaker 1: like flying enough to be part of this, you know
• 21:15
  Speaker 1: what I mean. And I'm like that to me is
• 21:17
  Speaker 1: such an honor because and it's like, no matter what
• 21:19
  Speaker 1: people would say, like obviously like black people set the culture.
• 21:23
  Speaker 1: Black people set the trend, like the music, the style,
• 21:26
  Speaker 1: the look, everybody wants to you know, like everyone wants
• 21:28
  Speaker 1: to look and sound and feel like black people. They
• 21:30
  Speaker 1: just don't want to, you know, have the struggle of
• 21:32
  Speaker 1: black people. And but and it's like, yeah, you know,
• 21:37
  Speaker 1: it's like it's an honor to effortlessly fall into it
• 21:39
  Speaker 1: and not feel like I'm like, because I feel like
• 21:42
  Speaker 1: there's other people that sort of like are peripherally in it,
• 21:46
  Speaker 1: that don't sort of naturally, and I feel like they're
• 21:49
  Speaker 1: forcing it. And they'll be like moments, whether it's like
• 21:52
  Speaker 1: on Twitter or missteps where I'm like, I don't even
• 21:56
  Speaker 1: I couldn't even see myself making that kind of misstep
• 21:58
  Speaker 1: because it's just not naturally. And then it makes one
• 22:00
  Speaker 1: moderate pandering. There's a lot of pandering, and the missteps
• 22:03
  Speaker 1: make it so obvious because I'm like, you could have
• 22:06
  Speaker 1: you didn't even like you just showed your whole hand
• 22:09
  Speaker 1: when you said that, Like I would never even say
• 22:11
  Speaker 1: what you just said, you know what I mean, Like,
• 22:13
  Speaker 1: why would you like the fact that that even came
• 22:15
  Speaker 1: into your mind? Is you know what I mean? And
• 22:17
  Speaker 1: it's like it's kind of funny how because I think
• 22:20
  Speaker 1: I think for the most part, like people of all,
• 22:23
  Speaker 1: like non white communities since the dawn of time. I've
• 22:26
  Speaker 1: seen all the appropriation that happens to their cultures, but
• 22:29
  Speaker 1: it wasn't really necessarily like chargeable in a tangible way
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: until like black Twitter arrived on the scene. You know,
• 22:37
  Speaker 1: Like I feel like when when social media came into play,
• 22:39
  Speaker 1: we were actually really able to see like, oh ship,
• 22:42
  Speaker 1: like people are really creating the next thing based on
• 22:46
  Speaker 1: the movement. Even if you look at like what happened,
• 22:48
  Speaker 1: what just happened with Popeyes? Did you spy B y
• 22:52
  Speaker 1: O B right now? Bring? They said, yo, if you
• 22:54
  Speaker 1: want to sayd we we're not making a sandwich right now,
• 22:56
  Speaker 1: but you could bring your own buon. We have mayonnaise
• 22:57
  Speaker 1: and pickles. It's just three tenders. Got They were like, lax,
• 23:01
  Speaker 1: that's literally like that's pop Eye's tweets today, B y
• 23:03
  Speaker 1: O B bring your own button. You can make your
• 23:05
  Speaker 1: own sandwich, you guys. I was like this, but even
• 23:08
  Speaker 1: just like the way, like the way the fast food
• 23:10
  Speaker 1: companies tweet at each other, it's like black it's black Twitter.
• 23:13
  Speaker 1: It's amazing. By the way, if you're not part of
• 23:15
  Speaker 1: like Twitter, why are you on Twitter? Then? I was like,
• 23:18
  Speaker 1: have you ever like accidentally gone down a weird rabbit?
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: Hole off like a political retweet and seemed like this,
• 23:23
  Speaker 1: do you know that there's Twitter that exists outside of
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: black Twitter? What a miserable place. It's such a miserable place.
• 23:30
  Speaker 1: I'm like, are using Twitter four and it's so funny
• 23:33
  Speaker 1: like what people will use their time for. Because I remember,
• 23:35
  Speaker 1: like I I've actually stopped tweeting for the most part,
• 23:38
  Speaker 1: I don't I don't tweet. I do on Facebook, Instagram
• 23:41
  Speaker 1: and just kind of my jam. Um, like like last year,
• 23:44
  Speaker 1: I was doing like the social media dtalk. So I
• 23:46
  Speaker 1: deleted everything off my phone and then like four weeks
• 23:49
  Speaker 1: later I realized that I had never put Twitter back on,
• 23:52
  Speaker 1: and then I just kind of stopped using it. Um. Also,
• 23:55
  Speaker 1: Twitter is a lot less fun since election. Let's keep
• 23:59
  Speaker 1: it an. So I was just gonna say, like I
• 24:01
  Speaker 1: used to be, like after the seen election, Like there
• 24:06
  Speaker 1: was a moment of time where I was just like
• 24:09
  Speaker 1: I I was just so so rabbit holy with politics right,
• 24:14
  Speaker 1: like it was actually making me sick because I was
• 24:16
  Speaker 1: just so shocked and devastated at the outcome, and I
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: had like you know, so I was constantly tweeting about
• 24:24
  Speaker 1: Trump and I was constantly adding him and being like
• 24:26
  Speaker 1: you ain't ship by the way, shot to Insecure writer
• 24:31
  Speaker 1: and starting Natasha Ratwa, who faithfully every day still tweets
• 24:34
  Speaker 1: to remind Donald Trump that he's not shipped every single
• 24:37
  Speaker 1: day and some form of words yea by the way,
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: like every single that. It's like, it's amazing, dude and
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: his like minions came for me and they started leaving
• 24:46
  Speaker 1: like bad book reviews on my Amazon and like all
• 24:49
  Speaker 1: this stuff, and I was like, when a time are
• 24:51
  Speaker 1: you awful? People? Imagine having that kind of time and
• 24:55
  Speaker 1: and and just that kind of passion behind something like that,
• 25:03
  Speaker 1: like behind another person disagreeing. It's just very Yeah, it's
• 25:09
  Speaker 1: just the election. We could do a whole podcast about
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: the election and that we Yeah, it's we are in
• 25:14
  Speaker 1: a weird time, guys. But anyway, the whole point is
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: black Twitter is everything. And I want to talk about
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: our origin story a little bit. I have a few
• 25:23
  Speaker 1: little twists and turns I want to take this conversation.
• 25:26
  Speaker 1: But so I want to talk about how we met.
• 25:28
  Speaker 1: Like I think I know we met in like two
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: thousand and twelve, um, and I think before that, like
• 25:37
  Speaker 1: Instagram was just starting to people were just kind of
• 25:39
  Speaker 1: starting to Instagram like you'd get maybe like ten likes
• 25:42
  Speaker 1: on your picture and be like, oh, wow, ten people
• 25:44
  Speaker 1: saw this double diges now. Um. But I remember at
• 25:48
  Speaker 1: that time, like Twitter was heavy. I used to be
• 25:50
  Speaker 1: super heavy on Twitter, and so I knew that we
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: had never met you. You were living in New York.
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: I knew that we had like a lot of mutual
• 25:57
  Speaker 1: so I had seen your name, and you know, I
• 25:59
  Speaker 1: had seen some of your content. I was like, oh,
• 26:01
  Speaker 1: she seems so cool. And then at that time, I
• 26:03
  Speaker 1: was I was working with Sway on series x M,
• 26:06
  Speaker 1: and we were about to shoot a spread in the
• 26:09
  Speaker 1: Source magazine. I could remember launched the show like I
• 26:13
  Speaker 1: was the original co host of the show, and so
• 26:16
  Speaker 1: we were doing like a lot of press about it
• 26:18
  Speaker 1: and a lot of different cool stuff, and I remember
• 26:21
  Speaker 1: I hit, uh, my girl Vanessa Vanessa was on the show.
• 26:25
  Speaker 1: Vanessa was how Vanessa was who referred to you. Yeah,
• 26:29
  Speaker 1: that's how we know that Vanessa Vanessa. I need a
• 26:32
  Speaker 1: makeup artist, like we're going to shoot something in the morning,
• 26:35
  Speaker 1: Like I don't know what to do, and she was like, okay,
• 26:38
  Speaker 1: I got you. Let me get my girl Joanna. And
• 26:40
  Speaker 1: then I remember you came in the studio and we
• 26:42
  Speaker 1: were like interviewing ice Cube that day, and in between
• 26:44
  Speaker 1: interview and ice Cube, like when we go to music,
• 26:47
  Speaker 1: you would do my makeup, like you would run up
• 26:49
  Speaker 1: and do my makeup, and we just like super hit
• 26:52
  Speaker 1: it off, and so much so that after I got
• 26:55
  Speaker 1: off work, like you came with me to my house
• 26:58
  Speaker 1: that same day. Gosh, yeah, we yeah, we we connected.
• 27:03
  Speaker 1: Also by the way, Sway used to be on the
• 27:05
  Speaker 1: radio in the Bay so there's like that other weird
• 27:08
  Speaker 1: Bay Area connection we have. Okay, such a national treasure,
• 27:11
  Speaker 1: but yeah, what a living legend. Yeah, yeah, that is
• 27:15
  Speaker 1: so funny. And then we went to I remember I
• 27:17
  Speaker 1: still remember your apartment. Oh my gosh, I loved it.
• 27:20
  Speaker 1: We looked in that building too for a minute, and
• 27:22
  Speaker 1: I was like, you know, I can't live into fire.
• 27:25
  Speaker 1: But that location was not the wave for relaxing. It
• 27:28
  Speaker 1: was expensive at the time, but the has gone up,
• 27:32
  Speaker 1: Like my last trip to New York, like I went by,
• 27:34
  Speaker 1: because sometimes I'll still go by and say what's up
• 27:37
  Speaker 1: to like the doorman at the building or the bodega
• 27:40
  Speaker 1: order next door, which he still remembered me. So now
• 27:44
  Speaker 1: it's like my pilgrimage every New York trip is to
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: go say hi to him something like yeah, the best,
• 27:49
  Speaker 1: like New York's the best, that's the best New York special.
• 27:53
  Speaker 1: But how like the rent went up like legitimately, like yeah,
• 27:57
  Speaker 1: I was insane and I was like, oh I could
• 27:59
  Speaker 1: I And it's still be living here if I'm afford this.
• 28:03
  Speaker 1: By the way, we were living in Williamsburg, I couldn't
• 28:05
  Speaker 1: even be. They put up new buildings all around us,
• 28:07
  Speaker 1: and when I saw the rent, I was like, who
• 28:09
  Speaker 1: actually can afford to live here? And the buildings would
• 28:12
  Speaker 1: like fill up. I'm like watching Refinery twenty nines um
• 28:19
  Speaker 1: where I live for how much like I g t
• 28:22
  Speaker 1: v s they do. I loveing sess and so they
• 28:24
  Speaker 1: highlight different people and what their apartments look like, like
• 28:28
  Speaker 1: fort d dollars a month, this is where I live
• 28:30
  Speaker 1: for three thousand dollars a month. This is where I live.
• 28:33
  Speaker 1: And it goes everywhere. So you have like people in
• 28:35
  Speaker 1: the Midwest, California and New York and you just see
• 28:38
  Speaker 1: like the differences, like the person in New York I
• 28:40
  Speaker 1: pay twelve thousand dollars a month and they're in a
• 28:42
  Speaker 1: closet and you're like, oh, nothing make you more upset
• 28:45
  Speaker 1: than watching like House Hunters or like Flip or Flop
• 28:49
  Speaker 1: or that are listed, or it was me the couch
• 28:54
  Speaker 1: and HDTV dude all day. I just got my nails
• 28:57
  Speaker 1: on and they had Fixer Upern and someone about a
• 29:00
  Speaker 1: was for ninety tho dollars and they had total all
• 29:03
  Speaker 1: in budgets for three dollars. With the renovation, they got
• 29:06
  Speaker 1: this like five bedroom masterpiece ranch. I was like, but
• 29:10
  Speaker 1: I mean, but then, like you have to live in Waco, Texas.
• 29:13
  Speaker 1: They're all in like Waco or like College Station, and
• 29:16
  Speaker 1: I don't like football that much. You're like, alright, right
• 29:20
  Speaker 1: right now, I can't have that house in Hollywood. Okay.
• 29:23
  Speaker 1: I want to talk about like your journey into being
• 29:26
  Speaker 1: a makeup artist, because I think now especially to like
• 29:29
  Speaker 1: makeup has become such a phenomenon in our world, like
• 29:33
  Speaker 1: especially with like YouTube and Instagram, and like you have
• 29:35
  Speaker 1: all of these like rising stars and all of these
• 29:38
  Speaker 1: like styles that didn't exist ten years ago that people
• 29:42
  Speaker 1: are rocking, like the heavy contour, or they existed, but
• 29:46
  Speaker 1: they existed in like a lesser like a more subtle
• 29:49
  Speaker 1: in smaller in niche areas, like when you would go
• 29:54
  Speaker 1: to like an amazing drag show you would see like
• 29:56
  Speaker 1: makeup at this level things like that, and that has
• 29:59
  Speaker 1: really crossed over to a mainstream look like everyday look
• 30:02
  Speaker 1: and everyday look. Yeah, which is an interesting switch because
• 30:06
  Speaker 1: I feel like for years, makeup has been marketed as
• 30:09
  Speaker 1: you know, enhancing, not transforming, and now makeup is being
• 30:12
  Speaker 1: marketed as transforming rather than It's interesting because I feel
• 30:16
  Speaker 1: like everything right now is being marketing as transforming from
• 30:20
  Speaker 1: and and literally on every level, like on a physical level,
• 30:23
  Speaker 1: like you'll have one end of the spectrum transform through
• 30:27
  Speaker 1: the fitness craze or on the other end of the
• 30:28
  Speaker 1: spectrum transformed through surgery. Then you have like transform your soul,
• 30:33
  Speaker 1: transform your mind. Like everything right now, everything is being
• 30:36
  Speaker 1: marketed is like how you are is not right, and
• 30:40
  Speaker 1: so like that's a much deeper, bigger issue. Um so
• 30:45
  Speaker 1: when you yea, when you so you let me, let's
• 30:48
  Speaker 1: start with your origin story, because you actually worked in
• 30:51
  Speaker 1: advertising before you even got into makeup, and makeup was
• 30:55
  Speaker 1: your second career and like, right now, I talk about
• 30:57
  Speaker 1: that a lot because I'm on kind of myself career,
• 31:00
  Speaker 1: you know, and it's like, I think a lot of
• 31:02
  Speaker 1: people but you're merging them beautifully right now. You know
• 31:08
  Speaker 1: she's wearing like evil eyes, but she has like the
• 31:10
  Speaker 1: microphone in front of her. It's very old dev and
• 31:12
  Speaker 1: new dev. Yes, that's my goal is to like intersect
• 31:17
  Speaker 1: the two. I mean I think, yeah, like I think
• 31:20
  Speaker 1: every part of you contribute to who you are now. Yeah.
• 31:23
  Speaker 1: So I worked, Um, I did marketing and PR for
• 31:26
  Speaker 1: a beauty brand, so it was always beauty for Carol's daughter.
• 31:30
  Speaker 1: Again shout to major black girl magic very organically. Um
• 31:34
  Speaker 1: and I think also probably on that note, learning how
• 31:37
  Speaker 1: to do marketing and PR through that lens of black
• 31:41
  Speaker 1: girl magic. Before black girl Magic hashtag like was even
• 31:45
  Speaker 1: like saying you know what I mean, Like we sort
• 31:47
  Speaker 1: of like set that tone for it in like literally
• 31:51
  Speaker 1: like two thousand five with like Jada and Mary and
• 31:54
  Speaker 1: then like Beyonce and Jay invested, and it was like
• 31:57
  Speaker 1: it was just like a big thing. We were like,
• 31:59
  Speaker 1: you know, you know, Lisa was into Lisa Price, who
• 32:01
  Speaker 1: is Carol's daughter. You know, she was into her natural
• 32:04
  Speaker 1: hair way before like natural hair was a thing, you
• 32:06
  Speaker 1: know what I mean. People would come to her when
• 32:08
  Speaker 1: they were like I'm transitioning before like transitioning was even
• 32:10
  Speaker 1: like a word you know what I mean. They're like
• 32:12
  Speaker 1: where you had like the numbers and the curl type,
• 32:14
  Speaker 1: and it was just like when you just want to
• 32:16
  Speaker 1: like you were like I think I don't want to
• 32:17
  Speaker 1: relax my hair anymore, and you would go knock on
• 32:19
  Speaker 1: Lisa's Brownstone door and she would like whip you up
• 32:22
  Speaker 1: something to get your curls in order like that. I mean,
• 32:24
  Speaker 1: so like, yeah, the origins of like a lot of
• 32:26
  Speaker 1: pop and Black Girl Magic. We could definitely like shout
• 32:28
  Speaker 1: out Lisa Price just for kind of like you know,
• 32:31
  Speaker 1: pushing the like love your natural hair early. Um So
• 32:35
  Speaker 1: for me coming in and learning, so it was like
• 32:38
  Speaker 1: a twofold, it was her, and then it was Steve Stout,
• 32:41
  Speaker 1: who is we all like a master marketer? Um so
• 32:44
  Speaker 1: to like learn marketing and advertising from somebody like him,
• 32:48
  Speaker 1: centered around you know, for lack of a better word
• 32:51
  Speaker 1: that didn't exist at that time, Black girl Magic. It
• 32:54
  Speaker 1: almost created this like perfect storm I think for me
• 32:57
  Speaker 1: and just naturally how I'd grown up and noing so
• 33:00
  Speaker 1: many beautiful black women and just kind of always feeling
• 33:03
  Speaker 1: like black women were so like the skin, the hair,
• 33:06
  Speaker 1: Like when I was young, I just remember like the
• 33:08
  Speaker 1: women that I looked at, like loved Halle Berry when
• 33:10
  Speaker 1: I was young, I was like, why don't I look
• 33:12
  Speaker 1: like her? Not like some random blonde cover girl, you
• 33:14
  Speaker 1: know what I mean? So I think like just sort
• 33:16
  Speaker 1: of having this real appreciation for the beauty of black women, um,
• 33:21
  Speaker 1: mixed with understanding respect and and you know, a deeper
• 33:26
  Speaker 1: story of like this is why our hair is such
• 33:29
  Speaker 1: a big deal. This is why you know anything like
• 33:32
  Speaker 1: this is this is why this stereotype exists that we
• 33:35
  Speaker 1: don't like to swim because we don't want to get
• 33:36
  Speaker 1: our hair. Like learning all those things from like that
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: business side of it and and sort of like learning
• 33:42
  Speaker 1: how to speak to that need. I think gave me
• 33:44
  Speaker 1: also like a unique path to sort of when I
• 33:47
  Speaker 1: did vera off and do makeup, um, to just sort
• 33:49
  Speaker 1: of like understanding the needs of black girl magic, do
• 33:53
  Speaker 1: you know what I mean? Like the things that like
• 33:55
  Speaker 1: black women weren't being served in beauty um to make
• 33:59
  Speaker 1: them feel beautiful, Like we talked about like the magazine covers,
• 34:02
  Speaker 1: like the lighting is not right and you, I mean,
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: we know this story a million times over, Like there's
• 34:06
  Speaker 1: no foundation colors for us, there's no you I could
• 34:09
  Speaker 1: look at your range right now and know that my
• 34:10
  Speaker 1: color doesn't exist, and you know, there's like a whole
• 34:13
  Speaker 1: bunch of like issues with beauty still, where like you
• 34:15
  Speaker 1: need to sell multiple colors because there are naturally multiple
• 34:18
  Speaker 1: tones and brown women's faces that are not in lighter
• 34:20
  Speaker 1: women's faces, and um, to just sort of understand that
• 34:24
  Speaker 1: and to to see that and to know how to
• 34:26
  Speaker 1: enhance that. I think all those things kind of snowball
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: so that when I left Carol' daughter, I decided I
• 34:31
  Speaker 1: wanted to move to l a UM and I was like,
• 34:33
  Speaker 1: I'm not going to get another job. I want to
• 34:35
  Speaker 1: just do makeup. I really love it. I've been doing
• 34:36
  Speaker 1: stuff on the side. And how did you How did
• 34:39
  Speaker 1: you come to love doing makeup? And how did you
• 34:41
  Speaker 1: start that process? Was that something that like the sparks
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: of that passion existed in your childhood? I loved it.
• 34:48
  Speaker 1: It's so funny. My oldest friend in the world that
• 34:50
  Speaker 1: I've known since I'm two years old, she's like nature girl,
• 34:53
  Speaker 1: like you know, northern California, crunchy, like she doesn't wear
• 34:56
  Speaker 1: any makeup. Her aunt always was like really lamb, like
• 35:00
  Speaker 1: she was always be in the bathroom like doing makeup
• 35:02
  Speaker 1: and I've known this girl since I too, Like we
• 35:04
  Speaker 1: would spend the night and her aunts that we would
• 35:05
  Speaker 1: you know, we would just get shuttled around like between
• 35:07
  Speaker 1: all our families. I was like, she's this girls like
• 35:08
  Speaker 1: my sister. It's so funny. My best friend just mentioned me.
• 35:11
  Speaker 1: She's like, I just remember you would like sit in
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: the bathroom and like watch my aunt do her makeup
• 35:16
  Speaker 1: like all the time. I mean like six years old,
• 35:18
  Speaker 1: eight years I was fascinated with it. I was like,
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: this is crazy. And I remember my aunt gave me
• 35:23
  Speaker 1: one of those like little cheesy you know, you like
• 35:25
  Speaker 1: open the box and there's like eighty eyes shadows and
• 35:27
  Speaker 1: then cream blushes and little cheese. And I got that
• 35:30
  Speaker 1: like from my little phone. Yeah, the little phone Advocators
• 35:33
  Speaker 1: is I mean the worst, but in like complete mix
• 35:36
  Speaker 1: of bacteria. Now that i'm a professional, I'm like, oh
• 35:38
  Speaker 1: my god, this is a girl so gross. But anyway,
• 35:40
  Speaker 1: and now my daughter gets them, which is I'm like, okay,
• 35:42
  Speaker 1: we're gonna get this um. But I remember I got
• 35:45
  Speaker 1: that from my aunt for like a birthday Christmas. I
• 35:47
  Speaker 1: definitely was an elementary school I had it. My mom
• 35:50
  Speaker 1: told me I couldn't play with it I couldn't bring
• 35:52
  Speaker 1: into school. My mom was like super feminist, like she
• 35:57
  Speaker 1: would like makeup now, but like when she was younger,
• 35:59
  Speaker 1: she was like very ants I like makeup, and she
• 36:02
  Speaker 1: was like grew up in New York and San Francisco,
• 36:04
  Speaker 1: like burn your bra, the whole thing. And um, I
• 36:08
  Speaker 1: remember she came to pick me up after school one
• 36:10
  Speaker 1: day and I was like playing all my friends, like
• 36:12
  Speaker 1: we were all putting the makeup on each other, and
• 36:13
  Speaker 1: she got so piste through it in the garbage, like
• 36:16
  Speaker 1: I told you can play with this, Like I was
• 36:17
  Speaker 1: so upset. Um. It's so funny because now, of course
• 36:21
  Speaker 1: she'll like asked me to do her makeup, and I'll
• 36:23
  Speaker 1: be like, do you remember I'm just saying, you have
• 36:27
  Speaker 1: to crush my dream. You just try to kill all
• 36:30
  Speaker 1: the vibes. Um, And she's like, I do not recall
• 36:33
  Speaker 1: that anyway. I'm like I vividly remember it. But yeah,
• 36:35
  Speaker 1: so I loved it from always, and I would do
• 36:38
  Speaker 1: everyone's makeup, like all my friends whatever, you know, from
• 36:41
  Speaker 1: like the cheapest whatever stuff we had, you know, you
• 36:45
  Speaker 1: going into our parents drawers and pulling out like old
• 36:47
  Speaker 1: Revlon single color, you know what I mean. But just
• 36:49
  Speaker 1: playing with it and understanding like where to put light,
• 36:52
  Speaker 1: where to put dark, and just kind of like learning
• 36:54
  Speaker 1: from like young young and playing with it. Um. And
• 36:57
  Speaker 1: I remember like when I so when I'm old, When
• 37:00
  Speaker 1: I was like in my twenties, makeup wasn't a thing
• 37:03
  Speaker 1: the way it is now, and I was already wearing it.
• 37:06
  Speaker 1: I loved it, and I loved, you know, enhancing my
• 37:08
  Speaker 1: eyes and I would do like bronzers like contour before
• 37:11
  Speaker 1: I even really knew what highlighting contour was. And I
• 37:13
  Speaker 1: remember I moved to New York and I think maybe
• 37:15
  Speaker 1: like in California, girls were wearing more makeup, but like
• 37:17
  Speaker 1: in New York girls were not wearing makeup yet. And
• 37:19
  Speaker 1: I remember I'd get like a lot of attention on
• 37:21
  Speaker 1: the street, which I mean whatever New York street arrestment
• 37:24
  Speaker 1: is New York streets. But it was like O D
• 37:26
  Speaker 1: and I was like wow, like me and this other
• 37:28
  Speaker 1: girl that I knew that was from l A. Like
• 37:30
  Speaker 1: she also she would wear like a beat like she
• 37:32
  Speaker 1: was wearing there. She was wearing the Instagram beat back then.
• 37:34
  Speaker 1: I was like this is intense, um, but like yeah,
• 37:36
  Speaker 1: we would get a lot of intention and I was
• 37:38
  Speaker 1: like makeup. Really it's like transformative and attention getting and
• 37:42
  Speaker 1: things like that. So it just made me really want
• 37:44
  Speaker 1: to play with it and understand it. And now it's like,
• 37:46
  Speaker 1: I mean, this probably sounds just like foreign to anyone
• 37:48
  Speaker 1: now to be like what it was revolutionary that you
• 37:50
  Speaker 1: were wearing makeup and hey, everyone looked like they're my
• 37:53
  Speaker 1: Instagram explore page now, but like yeah, at that time,
• 37:56
  Speaker 1: it was so it was like a thing that I
• 37:58
  Speaker 1: loved early and I think be and maybe it was
• 38:00
  Speaker 1: because Instagram wasn't a thing on social media and we
• 38:03
  Speaker 1: weren't seeing that, like there were these pockets of people
• 38:06
  Speaker 1: that were into it, um, and it made me really
• 38:08
  Speaker 1: love it. And um, I had a friend who was
• 38:13
  Speaker 1: a makeup artist and she would call me and have
• 38:15
  Speaker 1: her assist and she's like Union and she does like
• 38:17
  Speaker 1: TV shows and everything now like she's on like Shameless.
• 38:20
  Speaker 1: I think, like she does big shows, but she um
• 38:23
  Speaker 1: would call me into assist her and I would like
• 38:24
  Speaker 1: literally call out at Carol's daughter and like go assist her.
• 38:27
  Speaker 1: But it was like great to learn how to be
• 38:29
  Speaker 1: on set. And I was just so into it. So
• 38:31
  Speaker 1: then when I decided that I wanted to move to
• 38:33
  Speaker 1: l A. I was just like, this is definitely what
• 38:35
  Speaker 1: I want to do. I don't want to get a
• 38:36
  Speaker 1: job again, Like I can't go in an office, so
• 38:39
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna go crazy, so I'm just gonna do this. Yeah,
• 38:42
  Speaker 1: And it was yeah, I mean it was you know,
• 38:44
  Speaker 1: you gotta fall before you fly, right. It was rough
• 38:46
  Speaker 1: in the beginning, but it also wasn't so saturated at
• 38:48
  Speaker 1: that time, so I was able and I had a
• 38:50
  Speaker 1: ton of contacts, um, which was great because I don't
• 38:53
  Speaker 1: think I mean, now it's like a whole different Like
• 38:56
  Speaker 1: the way that makeup artists started when I started was
• 38:59
  Speaker 1: like you would be of the book and you would
• 39:00
  Speaker 1: test shoot and you'd create a portfolio and you would
• 39:02
  Speaker 1: share your portfoot And now it's like Instagram, get your
• 39:05
  Speaker 1: following up, tag people, get your get your following up,
• 39:07
  Speaker 1: you know what I mean. That's how you get eyes
• 39:08
  Speaker 1: on you. So that the old version of that was
• 39:12
  Speaker 1: build your book. I didn't do it that way, and
• 39:15
  Speaker 1: I probably wouldn't have done it the Instagram way now either,
• 39:18
  Speaker 1: although I did definitely use social media to my advantage. Um,
• 39:22
  Speaker 1: but I definitely had great contacts and I had a
• 39:25
  Speaker 1: PR and marketing background, so that was right when Twitter
• 39:28
  Speaker 1: was popping off, and you know, even though it was
• 39:30
  Speaker 1: barely busy, I just really knew how to So like
• 39:34
  Speaker 1: twofold a, I knew how to use like Twitter at
• 39:38
  Speaker 1: that time to my benefit, which was to make it
• 39:40
  Speaker 1: sound like I was busy and popping But because I
• 39:42
  Speaker 1: had an old school advertising marketing PR background, I already
• 39:47
  Speaker 1: knew the like don't blow your load on the on
• 39:50
  Speaker 1: the on the like now they put on call sheets,
• 39:52
  Speaker 1: like no social media, no photos that because people were
• 39:54
  Speaker 1: just like instagramming everything, these like kids who don't know
• 39:57
  Speaker 1: any better. And then like the whole project is being
• 40:00
  Speaker 1: like put online. Everything's leaking before, like no one wants
• 40:02
  Speaker 1: to present their art that way, like music video, you're
• 40:05
  Speaker 1: working on, the movie, the commercial, the photos. You can't
• 40:07
  Speaker 1: post those photos ahead of time. Now they put that
• 40:09
  Speaker 1: on call sheets. I knew that already, So I was
• 40:12
  Speaker 1: I was, like, if I say so, myself, pretty masterfully
• 40:15
  Speaker 1: using Twitter. And at that time, because Twitter had just started,
• 40:20
  Speaker 1: it was like that time where like you literally would
• 40:22
  Speaker 1: just like import your address book and be like do
• 40:24
  Speaker 1: you want to follow each other? So because I had
• 40:26
  Speaker 1: this amazing address book of like publicists, managers, beauty reps,
• 40:31
  Speaker 1: you know, artists like famous people that were like because
• 40:34
  Speaker 1: we were in each other's contacts because of my previous job,
• 40:37
  Speaker 1: Like every we would all follow each other, so I
• 40:39
  Speaker 1: had like a really good following to speak to immediately
• 40:45
  Speaker 1: without having to like five followers tag them yell into
• 40:47
  Speaker 1: the void to get attention. You know. It was like
• 40:49
  Speaker 1: a perfect Twitter. It was so like between my two
• 40:53
  Speaker 1: thousand and eight and two thousand and eleven. Yeah, like
• 40:58
  Speaker 1: at most twelve. It was so fun and popping and
• 41:04
  Speaker 1: just like it was like when we went to catch
• 41:06
  Speaker 1: a predator together, like that was like premium elite to Twitter. Yeah, yeah,
• 41:13
  Speaker 1: it was like it was it was a really special
• 41:15
  Speaker 1: time that. Yeah, it'll never be recreated. Yeah, no, now
• 41:19
  Speaker 1: everything is. And the same thing with instrument, like everything
• 41:22
  Speaker 1: is like there's no I don't even know that there's
• 41:25
  Speaker 1: a way to or get like every It's almost like
• 41:29
  Speaker 1: at that time everyone wasn't onto social media and only
• 41:32
  Speaker 1: industry people did one people were on Twitter absolutely, and
• 41:36
  Speaker 1: now everyone is. I think, you know, it's so funny too,
• 41:38
  Speaker 1: as I always think about like in the eighties that
• 41:41
  Speaker 1: like people that understood like the Internet and like chat
• 41:45
  Speaker 1: rooms were considered like nerds and like whatever. And now
• 41:49
  Speaker 1: it's like you look at someone who's not on social media,
• 41:51
  Speaker 1: You're like, you're not on any social media. We're kind
• 41:53
  Speaker 1: of nerd, like you know what I mean, And it's
• 41:55
  Speaker 1: like it's cool now to understand. But it was also
• 41:59
  Speaker 1: like at that time you had to really understand like
• 42:00
  Speaker 1: coding and things like that to really understand how to
• 42:03
  Speaker 1: get on a trap room. And now it's like, obviously
• 42:05
  Speaker 1: I used to think I was fired at coding. Like
• 42:07
  Speaker 1: when I had my Space post you I was music
• 42:10
  Speaker 1: and it was like lights and what I used to have,
• 42:13
  Speaker 1: like little glitter coming down like rain on my page
• 42:16
  Speaker 1: and we start that. Tom from my Spice taught an
• 42:18
  Speaker 1: entire generation how to code, though, and then Facebook took
• 42:22
  Speaker 1: it from us. Tom a real one. By the way,
• 42:25
  Speaker 1: don't feel bad for Tom because I remember one time
• 42:27
  Speaker 1: someone posted on Twitter whatever having to Tom from my Space,
• 42:29
  Speaker 1: that that dude just fell off the face of earth.
• 42:32
  Speaker 1: He retweeted something like my company got bought for five million.
• 42:35
  Speaker 1: I'm sucking your mom in Bermuda, or I was like
• 42:38
  Speaker 1: whoa shot to Tom from my Space Spivy, I was like,
• 42:44
  Speaker 1: whoa come back? So now in this in this evolution
• 42:50
  Speaker 1: of you. You are a mom of a four year
• 42:52
  Speaker 1: old am She's amazing, She's perfect, and you know how
• 42:56
  Speaker 1: like it is so your daughter. She's by she is,
• 43:01
  Speaker 1: but she will be seen as and received as a
• 43:03
  Speaker 1: black woman in society. How do you? Is that something
• 43:06
  Speaker 1: that you think about all the time, really all the time? Um,
• 43:11
  Speaker 1: not so much. It's funny because as much as I
• 43:14
  Speaker 1: talk about sort of like being like an open ear
• 43:18
  Speaker 1: for like understanding and listening, there's just no way. And
• 43:22
  Speaker 1: I know that there's no way I could understand really
• 43:24
  Speaker 1: what it means to walk in the world as a
• 43:26
  Speaker 1: black woman. I could listen and and I can yell
• 43:30
  Speaker 1: as much as I can about like injustices and things
• 43:33
  Speaker 1: that are not right and and try to fix them
• 43:35
  Speaker 1: in my own small ways, whether that's just sort of
• 43:39
  Speaker 1: like helping set a beauty trend where that that like
• 43:41
  Speaker 1: black is beautiful, whatever those things are, but I can
• 43:44
  Speaker 1: never like, I don't I don't know what that feels like,
• 43:46
  Speaker 1: and I never could. Um. So I think about that
• 43:50
  Speaker 1: a lot. Actually I think about it almost every day honestly,
• 43:52
  Speaker 1: because you know, I do her hair every day. I
• 43:56
  Speaker 1: intentionally stuck her bookshelves with brown faces constantly like all
• 44:01
  Speaker 1: my all, her entire bookshelf is inclusive of like I
• 44:06
  Speaker 1: love the books you have for and you've gotten quests
• 44:08
  Speaker 1: so many amazing books. Big on starting it early when
• 44:12
  Speaker 1: I was at your house, like I was doing story
• 44:14
  Speaker 1: time with her, and she had this beautiful book and
• 44:16
  Speaker 1: it was about all like the colors of of like
• 44:20
  Speaker 1: black womanhood, and so you had every pretty little black
• 44:23
  Speaker 1: girl and she was like, Debbie, that's you. Look, this
• 44:27
  Speaker 1: one's me. And it was just so like so I
• 44:31
  Speaker 1: could just see her like I don't want to say
• 44:33
  Speaker 1: wheels turning because she's not giving it that much thought,
• 44:35
  Speaker 1: but it just it was so effortless her understanding of
• 44:42
  Speaker 1: raise her understanding of like colorism at that age, Like
• 44:47
  Speaker 1: it was just yeah, it's like I don't want to
• 44:50
  Speaker 1: it's such a weird dance. And I'm sure that that's
• 44:52
  Speaker 1: a dance. That's someone that who has a child of
• 44:55
  Speaker 1: any ethnicity that's not white, a full one that that
• 44:58
  Speaker 1: you that you have you think about the like you
• 45:00
  Speaker 1: send your you're gonna send your son into the world
• 45:01
  Speaker 1: and he's going to be a black man, you know
• 45:03
  Speaker 1: what I mean, Like you think about it, and you
• 45:05
  Speaker 1: know it's like at what aged you sort of like
• 45:10
  Speaker 1: kill the innocence of of like what does it mean
• 45:13
  Speaker 1: that the world sees you this way? Um? And so
• 45:16
  Speaker 1: right now, obviously I'm not trying to do that, but
• 45:18
  Speaker 1: we also will read books, like you know, there's a
• 45:21
  Speaker 1: lot of children's books that we read where like it'll
• 45:23
  Speaker 1: be a story about um. Someone maybe they had to
• 45:27
  Speaker 1: like that was encouraged to like change their name to
• 45:30
  Speaker 1: something that sounded Russian because like you're a ballerina, and
• 45:33
  Speaker 1: like ballerinas are supposed to be Russian and you could
• 45:35
  Speaker 1: pass as Russian. So wow and so funny. So we
• 45:38
  Speaker 1: I had talked with a friend of mine who's a
• 45:41
  Speaker 1: mother UM and she her children are beautiful blonde, blue
• 45:46
  Speaker 1: eyes like she's white, her husband's white, and but she's
• 45:48
  Speaker 1: also very woke and she like she kind of wanted
• 45:51
  Speaker 1: to talk to a pediatrician about I think it was
• 45:53
  Speaker 1: more it wasn't a specific race question, but it was
• 45:56
  Speaker 1: about like UM, I think it was like a birds
• 45:59
  Speaker 1: and bees question. And the pedetrician had told her just
• 46:02
  Speaker 1: like across the board, read the story as it is
• 46:06
  Speaker 1: and then just feel the questions as they come, you
• 46:08
  Speaker 1: know what I mean, Like, don't over explain anything because
• 46:11
  Speaker 1: like their brain isn't processing it yet. So like when
• 46:14
  Speaker 1: I read her the stories of like people being encouraged
• 46:17
  Speaker 1: to change their name or whatever part of me wants
• 46:19
  Speaker 1: to be like, but because they said this, and don't
• 46:20
  Speaker 1: you think this is wrong? But I'm just like I'm
• 46:22
  Speaker 1: gonna let her ask because I feel like, you know,
• 46:25
  Speaker 1: they're going to receive the information when they once they're
• 46:28
  Speaker 1: thinking about the question. That means that their brain now
• 46:30
  Speaker 1: is going to be ready to like process the answer
• 46:32
  Speaker 1: a little bit better. Um. But yes, I think about
• 46:35
  Speaker 1: it every day. Um. I just I do my best,
• 46:40
  Speaker 1: you know what I mean. I give her the right
• 46:43
  Speaker 1: now she's for I fill her bookshelf with brown books.
• 46:46
  Speaker 1: I intentionally make sure that, um, she sees amazing black
• 46:52
  Speaker 1: women and all women. Honestly, I don't want to like
• 46:55
  Speaker 1: all lives matter the whole thing, but like I definitely
• 46:57
  Speaker 1: want her to see like amazing women. Um. And it's
• 47:00
  Speaker 1: funny because my husband is the one who's like, because
• 47:01
  Speaker 1: we have like a lot of amazing black art up
• 47:03
  Speaker 1: in our home, which is like I kind of push
• 47:05
  Speaker 1: for it. I'm like, let's put this up. We have
• 47:06
  Speaker 1: an amazing here Brandy, like fly girl, Like it's literally
• 47:09
  Speaker 1: like framed in her room. Um, and I we have
• 47:12
  Speaker 1: like your Nelson's up and things like that. And he's like,
• 47:15
  Speaker 1: and I have like these vintage like makeup posters like
• 47:17
  Speaker 1: Revlon that have like these like nineteen fifties white women whatever.
• 47:20
  Speaker 1: And I was like, he's like, no, He's like, you
• 47:22
  Speaker 1: should put one of those that put it up in
• 47:23
  Speaker 1: the bathroom. He's like, he's like, don't a race that
• 47:25
  Speaker 1: you're also part of? Her? You know what I mean?
• 47:28
  Speaker 1: But it is like this weird thing because to your point,
• 47:31
  Speaker 1: the world is going to see her as a black
• 47:33
  Speaker 1: woman kind of like it matters that I'm here as
• 47:35
  Speaker 1: her mom, but like doesn't matter that she's white. Not
• 47:38
  Speaker 1: in America like maybe in other places, but like here,
• 47:40
  Speaker 1: we've kind of made it so it doesn't like I see,
• 47:43
  Speaker 1: I see both sides of it, because I definitely get
• 47:45
  Speaker 1: what he's saying, like your your story and your life
• 47:48
  Speaker 1: and your family history are monumentally important. But then also
• 47:53
  Speaker 1: coming from your perspective is kind of like, well, the
• 47:55
  Speaker 1: world will teach her about being white. She's going to
• 47:57
  Speaker 1: see plenty of beautiful white women on boards, know what
• 48:00
  Speaker 1: I mean? I want I want in her house to see.
• 48:02
  Speaker 1: I want to see beautiful black women and black men
• 48:05
  Speaker 1: being a you know what I mean. I'm like, like
• 48:07
  Speaker 1: she'll see white women on magazine covers, regardless on billboards,
• 48:12
  Speaker 1: on TV. You know what I mean. It just kind
• 48:14
  Speaker 1: of is what it is. Um. Yeah, so I would
• 48:17
  Speaker 1: like so much because now we're both parents. You know,
• 48:20
  Speaker 1: I think about child rearing as a whole constantly, which
• 48:25
  Speaker 1: I guess is pretty obvious because my kid is one. Um.
• 48:28
  Speaker 1: But just when I like the kind of struggle I
• 48:31
  Speaker 1: have a little bit with thinking about the ways in
• 48:35
  Speaker 1: which like the sacred guiding I will do with him
• 48:39
  Speaker 1: will shape him. Is like when I when I bring
• 48:42
  Speaker 1: him to play like my own spiritual work, right, Like
• 48:44
  Speaker 1: how much is like what are the best ways to
• 48:48
  Speaker 1: share like tools for wholeness with this tiny soul that
• 48:51
  Speaker 1: can't comprehend much yet? You know, because like I'm in this, Um,
• 48:55
  Speaker 1: I'm in this program right now. I'm doing um some
• 48:58
  Speaker 1: second career goaling, I guess I should say, um, but
• 49:01
  Speaker 1: I'm doing like a couple different. I'm doing like a
• 49:04
  Speaker 1: collegiate psychology program and I'm also doing a spiritual psychology
• 49:08
  Speaker 1: program right now that I'll be doing like for the
• 49:11
  Speaker 1: next I've almost finished one year and I have like
• 49:13
  Speaker 1: two more years to go. Um And you know, one
• 49:16
  Speaker 1: of the things I noticed because my my class is
• 49:19
  Speaker 1: filled with such a mix of people. So you have
• 49:22
  Speaker 1: people that that experience severe traumatic harm in their family
• 49:28
  Speaker 1: lineage and their personal lives, like lots of generational trauma
• 49:31
  Speaker 1: um that are starting to awaken. You have I guess
• 49:34
  Speaker 1: I would put myself in the category of someone that
• 49:36
  Speaker 1: has been journeying for for close to a decade. So
• 49:39
  Speaker 1: I'm still learning and growing, but I am very awake
• 49:42
  Speaker 1: and aware of a lot, and I've made a lot
• 49:44
  Speaker 1: of shifts. And then you have people who were raised
• 49:48
  Speaker 1: in this right like like a couple of classmates that
• 49:50
  Speaker 1: I met have been doing like Kundalini yoga since they
• 49:53
  Speaker 1: were two years old, right Like they've been going to
• 49:55
  Speaker 1: ashram since they were children. But this is what I've noticed,
• 49:58
  Speaker 1: and this is what I think about const only, and
• 50:00
  Speaker 1: I hope I can It's a lot going on in
• 50:02
  Speaker 1: this head, y'all. So I hope that I can word
• 50:04
  Speaker 1: it in a way that that is receivable. But what
• 50:07
  Speaker 1: I've noticed about all of us, about the experience of
• 50:09
  Speaker 1: being a human being is at a soul level, we
• 50:13
  Speaker 1: always crave what we were missing on both sides of
• 50:17
  Speaker 1: the spectrum. So if you came from a problematic household,
• 50:20
  Speaker 1: your soul is really searching to experience peace. You're really
• 50:24
  Speaker 1: longing to have this ideal of the quote unquote perfect
• 50:28
  Speaker 1: family or perfect relationship or things like that. But you're
• 50:30
  Speaker 1: kind of pulled into your natural reset of dysfunction because
• 50:34
  Speaker 1: that was your normal. On the flip side of that,
• 50:37
  Speaker 1: what I found is when I meet people that were
• 50:39
  Speaker 1: raised with this like raised by deeply awakened parents that
• 50:44
  Speaker 1: put them into this kind of highly highly spiritual environment,
• 50:49
  Speaker 1: is a lot of them are very apathetic. Their soul
• 50:54
  Speaker 1: is craving suffering. Their soul is craving chaos. So a
• 51:00
  Speaker 1: lot of a lot of the people that I've met
• 51:04
  Speaker 1: in that space actually go through these phases where they
• 51:07
  Speaker 1: are seeking out harmful experiences because they don't know what
• 51:11
  Speaker 1: they're like. It's almost like, um, the good girl raised
• 51:14
  Speaker 1: in the suburbs that wants to go out with like
• 51:16
  Speaker 1: the bad boy. You're missing. You're missing that feeling. And
• 51:19
  Speaker 1: that's how all of us are because if like Earth
• 51:21
  Speaker 1: is our school and we're here to learn something, that's
• 51:24
  Speaker 1: why life could never be fair and which it's kind
• 51:27
  Speaker 1: of a call back to what we talked about earlier
• 51:28
  Speaker 1: about how everything is being marketed to transform, Like we
• 51:33
  Speaker 1: humans crave transformation, crave because you know what it is,
• 51:36
  Speaker 1: it is our natural state that we have run from
• 51:39
  Speaker 1: for so long. Like when people even say stuff like, oh,
• 51:42
  Speaker 1: people don't change, now, listen, there are people that maybe
• 51:46
  Speaker 1: in this lifetime it's not their destiny to change, because
• 51:49
  Speaker 1: there are some stubborn people that will hold onto their
• 51:52
  Speaker 1: toxicity till the day they get in the ground. But
• 51:55
  Speaker 1: our natural setting is changed. Like if you look at nature,
• 51:59
  Speaker 1: fall like the transformation of fall right, the cycle of
• 52:02
  Speaker 1: life and death, the cycle of day to night, the
• 52:05
  Speaker 1: cycle of you know, um, everything we see in every
• 52:09
  Speaker 1: moment like really speaks to the fundamental not just desire
• 52:16
  Speaker 1: but responsibility to change in every moment, you know. So
• 52:21
  Speaker 1: then almost and I kind of get where you're going
• 52:24
  Speaker 1: with that as far as like what was missing, so
• 52:26
  Speaker 1: like I should be represented in there, No no, no, no,
• 52:29
  Speaker 1: But I'm I'm more so speaking of like the way
• 52:32
  Speaker 1: i'm I'm really like unraveling a lot of thoughts of
• 52:36
  Speaker 1: what I want my my parenting journey to look well,
• 52:39
  Speaker 1: that's what I was gonna say, because I'm what does
• 52:40
  Speaker 1: that mean that no matter, like you should almost like
• 52:44
  Speaker 1: you want to be this perfect parent and create a
• 52:46
  Speaker 1: perfect home and all these things. But it's almost like
• 52:48
  Speaker 1: then they're just gonna go seek out that toxicity. But
• 52:51
  Speaker 1: like you don't want to be intentionally talk it's a
• 52:54
  Speaker 1: very fun to like to what's the word like when
• 52:57
  Speaker 1: you're very like like helicopter in your child, and yeah,
• 53:01
  Speaker 1: like you don't like I don't. On one hand, I
• 53:03
  Speaker 1: don't want to like pad quests fall too much, right
• 53:07
  Speaker 1: Like I don't want to make his life so like
• 53:09
  Speaker 1: puppies and butterflies and rainbows and um, because then I
• 53:13
  Speaker 1: don't I want to be able to cultivate resilience in
• 53:16
  Speaker 1: him because he will not be in my household forever.
• 53:18
  Speaker 1: He will be in the world, and the world is
• 53:20
  Speaker 1: a very kind of challenging place against our nature as
• 53:23
  Speaker 1: a mom, I don't want to protect them with it.
• 53:25
  Speaker 1: But then on the side, I'm like, no, like I
• 53:27
  Speaker 1: don't want I'm getting disappointed, and when I'm getting hurt,
• 53:29
  Speaker 1: I don't want this baby, my precious, my precious, precious
• 53:34
  Speaker 1: gift from God. You know, it's so it's like a
• 53:38
  Speaker 1: it's such a dance. And I guess that's the thing
• 53:41
  Speaker 1: that I'm really experiencing right now is the idea of
• 53:44
  Speaker 1: surrendering to what the parenting journey is and knowing that
• 53:48
  Speaker 1: no matter how good my intention is, like his spiritual
• 53:54
  Speaker 1: curriculum is his spiritual curriculum, he will have the experiences
• 53:58
  Speaker 1: placed in his life he has meant to play, having
• 54:01
  Speaker 1: his life on a soul level to learn and uncover
• 54:04
  Speaker 1: what he's meant to know, no matter if I'm a
• 54:06
  Speaker 1: great mom or bad mom. Like life, he will experience
• 54:10
  Speaker 1: life and the way that his soul signed up to
• 54:12
  Speaker 1: experience it. And you know, I'm like, I don't know
• 54:15
  Speaker 1: how you feel about like reincarnation and and things like that,
• 54:18
  Speaker 1: but you know, oh yeah, I think you know your soul.
• 54:23
  Speaker 1: And we had this conversation I think one night, um
• 54:26
  Speaker 1: that this was the night like we really bonded. We
• 54:28
  Speaker 1: like went to this dinner for like four hours and
• 54:30
  Speaker 1: had this really crazy deep spiritual conversation super us Like
• 54:34
  Speaker 1: me and you were the friends that like like if
• 54:36
  Speaker 1: we're in the same city at the same time before
• 54:38
  Speaker 1: we became neighbors, because now that's every day and like
• 54:42
  Speaker 1: literally I remember this one time that we were like,
• 54:45
  Speaker 1: I was like, girl, like, I'm in New York, but
• 54:46
  Speaker 1: I have to leave in two hours. You were like,
• 54:48
  Speaker 1: meet me at the met that's the museum in New York.
• 54:52
  Speaker 1: Let's spend an hour walking the museum and catching up.
• 54:56
  Speaker 1: And that's like kind of our thing, like we like
• 54:58
  Speaker 1: to be walking, experiencing and then having these like deep
• 55:03
  Speaker 1: conversation conversational the importance. But so we were talking about
• 55:10
  Speaker 1: I remember this conversation because I had had this conversation
• 55:13
  Speaker 1: one time. So I remember I was younger and I
• 55:14
  Speaker 1: kept having a recurring dream and I think I told
• 55:17
  Speaker 1: you about this, but you probably remember it. So I
• 55:18
  Speaker 1: was I would be in the mirror and I was me,
• 55:21
  Speaker 1: and then I was like, I found like I was
• 55:24
  Speaker 1: like a young me, I don't know, seventeens, and I
• 55:26
  Speaker 1: found like a facial hair, and I was like, I
• 55:27
  Speaker 1: shaved it, and I shaved it again, and it kept
• 55:29
  Speaker 1: growing and growing until it was like a full beard.
• 55:31
  Speaker 1: And I looked in the mirror and realized I was
• 55:33
  Speaker 1: a boy, and I was a French boy, and it
• 55:36
  Speaker 1: was such a weird thing. I was very clear that
• 55:38
  Speaker 1: I was a French boy. It was but I started
• 55:41
  Speaker 1: as me in the mirror, and I remember telling my
• 55:43
  Speaker 1: mom about the dream and I was like, I keep
• 55:44
  Speaker 1: having this dream. It's so weird. And my mom is um,
• 55:48
  Speaker 1: she's not a religious person at all, but she has
• 55:50
  Speaker 1: a sense of spirituality that goes back to her kind
• 55:54
  Speaker 1: of like hippie, you know, floaty, And she said that
• 55:58
  Speaker 1: she feels that, you know, she strongly reincarnation, and she
• 56:01
  Speaker 1: thinks that like whatever we call God is sort of
• 56:05
  Speaker 1: all the soul. It's like, you know how matter is
• 56:07
  Speaker 1: neither created nor destroyed, it's just kind of transferred. Like
• 56:10
  Speaker 1: all of the energy of the universe is God, and
• 56:12
  Speaker 1: it's all of our souls and you kind of get
• 56:15
  Speaker 1: sent back to live it again and again and again
• 56:17
  Speaker 1: until you're a whole person, and then you then you're done.
• 56:21
  Speaker 1: Then you get to go be part of God, you
• 56:23
  Speaker 1: know what I mean. Like, that's what she can She's like,
• 56:25
  Speaker 1: she's like yeah, She's like, it's not like some guy
• 56:27
  Speaker 1: sitting on a throne saying I smite you. She's like no,
• 56:30
  Speaker 1: She's like this, that's why all we have to be
• 56:32
  Speaker 1: responsible for the energy that we bring into every space,
• 56:34
  Speaker 1: because we're all part of the same thing. So it's
• 56:37
  Speaker 1: interesting that you say, like question journey is going to
• 56:40
  Speaker 1: be his journey, like whatever he signed up for, because
• 56:42
  Speaker 1: we don't you don't know yet if he's an old soul,
• 56:44
  Speaker 1: if he's a young because you've definitely met people where
• 56:46
  Speaker 1: it's like they're brand new, and then you've met people
• 56:48
  Speaker 1: where you're like, oh, this might be your last go around,
• 56:51
  Speaker 1: like idea and you three year olds that are like
• 56:54
  Speaker 1: wise and I don't mean like smart, like they can
• 56:56
  Speaker 1: like they are just soul wise, and then you meet
• 56:59
  Speaker 1: fifty year old men where you're like, oh, honey, you're
• 57:01
  Speaker 1: brand new. You've got so many spins around this planet,
• 57:04
  Speaker 1: like I'll catch you next time. Like it's so interesting
• 57:06
  Speaker 1: because like that's given me so much grace for everyone
• 57:10
  Speaker 1: I come in contact with in my life, because even
• 57:12
  Speaker 1: if we're all in the same school per se, like
• 57:16
  Speaker 1: I might be working on my master's right now and
• 57:18
  Speaker 1: you're master in kindergarten right and there's no it doesn't
• 57:21
  Speaker 1: mean I'm better than you. It doesn't mean you know
• 57:24
  Speaker 1: that that there's this like leveling happening. It just means
• 57:27
  Speaker 1: like we are meant to learn different things. That's go around,
• 57:31
  Speaker 1: and I'm super convinced that there are some people that
• 57:34
  Speaker 1: they're just like in this lifetime, they're just meant to
• 57:37
  Speaker 1: experience humanity and learn how to survive. Right, So as
• 57:41
  Speaker 1: long as the core of their needs are met, like
• 57:43
  Speaker 1: they are putting food in their stomach and have some
• 57:46
  Speaker 1: more to sleep, Like, that's pretty much the entirety of
• 57:49
  Speaker 1: what their growth is going to be, because that's their
• 57:52
  Speaker 1: destination this trip, you know, like this incarnation of my life.
• 57:56
  Speaker 1: I was always destined to be a seeker. I was
• 57:59
  Speaker 1: always death sent to be deeply curious about myself in
• 58:02
  Speaker 1: the world so that I could unlock new levels of
• 58:05
  Speaker 1: me and like into patterns and stop some generational trauma
• 58:09
  Speaker 1: from moving forward to all of my descendants. You know,
• 58:13
  Speaker 1: absolutely yeah. And it's just like you, like you meet
• 58:16
  Speaker 1: people where they are, and I think that's how you
• 58:18
  Speaker 1: give people grace, right, Like you you just kind of
• 58:21
  Speaker 1: mean and listen to some people. Like it doesn't mean
• 58:22
  Speaker 1: you have to force everyone into your space. If they're
• 58:25
  Speaker 1: not good for your space, they're not good for your space.
• 58:27
  Speaker 1: But like you can. I think like everyone would just
• 58:31
  Speaker 1: get along better and everyone in the world would just
• 58:33
  Speaker 1: be so much calmer if people could just sort of
• 58:35
  Speaker 1: allow grace, just like when we talk about like where
• 58:37
  Speaker 1: someone has time to get online to like we disagree
• 58:40
  Speaker 1: about this one fundamental thing, and now you have time
• 58:42
  Speaker 1: to come and write bad book reviews and think about it.
• 58:44
  Speaker 1: It's just like it's just like, can we just give
• 58:46
  Speaker 1: each other a little bit of grace here, Like it's fine, guys,
• 58:49
  Speaker 1: Like we can disagree on this, It's fine. I didn't
• 58:52
  Speaker 1: say you were deplorable, even though I implied it, like anyway, okay,
• 58:56
  Speaker 1: we're not talking about politics, but um, but also also
• 59:00
  Speaker 1: as being in full acceptance of what the reality of
• 59:03
  Speaker 1: whatever situation is. And I think a lot of people
• 59:05
  Speaker 1: mix up like the true definition and intention of the
• 59:09
  Speaker 1: word acceptance. Acceptance does not mean to agree, right Like,
• 59:13
  Speaker 1: acceptance doesn't mean like someone does something bad to you,
• 59:17
  Speaker 1: I accept it, So that means that you are encouraging
• 59:20
  Speaker 1: it or you're in support of their treatment. It just
• 59:23
  Speaker 1: means that you accept that this is the reality of
• 59:26
  Speaker 1: what is now in this moment. Doesn't mean you don't
• 59:29
  Speaker 1: want it to change. It doesn't mean that you are
• 59:31
  Speaker 1: not going to change it. It just means that you're
• 59:33
  Speaker 1: not fighting your reality in every moment and causing your
• 59:36
  Speaker 1: own suffering by trying to make life something that it
• 59:41
  Speaker 1: just is not right now. The serenity to accept the
• 59:45
  Speaker 1: things I cannot change, the courage to change the things
• 59:48
  Speaker 1: I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. That's
• 59:51
  Speaker 1: literally what that quote is about. It's so caught up
• 59:54
  Speaker 1: in the use of accept to mean that allow. We
• 59:59
  Speaker 1: think accept means allow and it doesn't except really just
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 1: means to be kind of that as an observation, what
• 1:00:08
  Speaker 1: is current colleague true with what is happening? Yeah, I
• 1:00:10
  Speaker 1: mean and to yeah, to not fight it and and
• 1:00:13
  Speaker 1: weirdly going and going back to like growing up in
• 1:00:16
  Speaker 1: the Bay Area like in the eighties and nineties, I
• 1:00:18
  Speaker 1: always try to explain to people, I'm like that is
• 1:00:21
  Speaker 1: that was sort of the energy at that time it was.
• 1:00:23
  Speaker 1: And I think that that if you meet people like
• 1:00:26
  Speaker 1: a Carly Hustle or Ali Wong or me or the
• 1:00:30
  Speaker 1: Ebro maybe like people that you might meet with and
• 1:00:33
  Speaker 1: maybe like they have strong opinions about things, you'll find
• 1:00:38
  Speaker 1: that most of their strong opinions are sort of almost
• 1:00:40
  Speaker 1: like would be considered like socialism opinions, where it's just
• 1:00:43
  Speaker 1: sort of like because we that I think that pocket
• 1:00:46
  Speaker 1: of the country at that time was very live and
• 1:00:49
  Speaker 1: let live. You know, it was very accepting, like you know,
• 1:00:52
  Speaker 1: we were you know obviously like Harvey Milk was like
• 1:00:54
  Speaker 1: the first game there, and Mayor Mouscot or he was
• 1:00:57
  Speaker 1: a supervisor, and Mayor Mausconi and like you know that
• 1:01:01
  Speaker 1: just like San Francisco has always been a much more
• 1:01:04
  Speaker 1: accepting place. Like I think about, like I read so
• 1:01:08
  Speaker 1: much this year because it was um the fifth anniversary
• 1:01:13
  Speaker 1: of Stonewall riots, um, during World Pride and reading about
• 1:01:18
  Speaker 1: that experience that like so many trans men and women
• 1:01:23
  Speaker 1: had and gay men and women had in a city
• 1:01:28
  Speaker 1: like New York that is touted for being so accepting
• 1:01:31
  Speaker 1: and and just and just hearing with and then like
• 1:01:33
  Speaker 1: knowing like the history of like my city and what
• 1:01:36
  Speaker 1: gay and trans people went through in at that time
• 1:01:38
  Speaker 1: and just kind of like really, I'm like, no, you
• 1:01:40
  Speaker 1: guys don't know from accepting like this is an accepting place.
• 1:01:43
  Speaker 1: And again it's it doesn't necessarily mean like I agree
• 1:01:46
  Speaker 1: or this is my life. It's just kind of like
• 1:01:47
  Speaker 1: we co exist together, whether it's good or bad in
• 1:01:50
  Speaker 1: your mind or not. Um And I think like growing
• 1:01:53
  Speaker 1: up in that energy all the time just kind of
• 1:01:57
  Speaker 1: leads to um calm, Like I don't. I don't know
• 1:02:01
  Speaker 1: that it doesn't like when we talk about like what's missing,
• 1:02:04
  Speaker 1: I don't know that you're going to necessarily now always
• 1:02:07
  Speaker 1: feel calm. But like for me, it's worked like I'm
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 1: I generally feel calm unless I see something that I
• 1:02:14
  Speaker 1: feel is so um blatantly against humankind, which you know,
• 1:02:20
  Speaker 1: to your point, I can be very loud political politically
• 1:02:23
  Speaker 1: on social media. UM, but it's it's just sort of
• 1:02:26
  Speaker 1: like an outrage, and I just feel like there's a difference,
• 1:02:29
  Speaker 1: um when the outrage has to do with basic humanity
• 1:02:32
  Speaker 1: or when the outrage is based on like your per
• 1:02:35
  Speaker 1: personal press about something, you know what I mean, And
• 1:02:37
  Speaker 1: I think like understanding, like being able to take a
• 1:02:40
  Speaker 1: step back and like looking at is this my personal
• 1:02:43
  Speaker 1: preference or is this like our basic needs of humanity
• 1:02:46
  Speaker 1: being met? To your point, I'm outraged when the basic
• 1:02:49
  Speaker 1: needs of humanity are not being met, you know what
• 1:02:51
  Speaker 1: I mean. I mean, it's it's even in all like
• 1:02:54
  Speaker 1: my Nama state glory. It's like it's deeply difficult to
• 1:02:57
  Speaker 1: navigate um ignorant, you know, Like there was this meme
• 1:03:02
  Speaker 1: that went around on Instagram recently and it was like,
• 1:03:05
  Speaker 1: I'm in therapy because of all the people in who
• 1:03:07
  Speaker 1: are not in their fax, and I'm like, you're like,
• 1:03:11
  Speaker 1: I need this on a teamer same same, same singh
• 1:03:14
  Speaker 1: you know the lingua franca sweaters, those like embroidered sweater.
• 1:03:18
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna get you in with that saying on it.
• 1:03:19
  Speaker 1: That's gonna be my gift to you girl. Yes, because
• 1:03:23
  Speaker 1: lord yeah work, But that's really what it is. It's like,
• 1:03:27
  Speaker 1: how can we how can we seek our own growth
• 1:03:31
  Speaker 1: and then manage our experience of still living with the
• 1:03:34
  Speaker 1: rest of humanity and and not letting it engulf us,
• 1:03:38
  Speaker 1: you know, and then like that that's when like your
• 1:03:41
  Speaker 1: self care has to come in a little bit. And
• 1:03:42
  Speaker 1: however you practice your self care, whether it's a meditation
• 1:03:46
  Speaker 1: or crystals or a workout or a social media detox,
• 1:03:50
  Speaker 1: what's your self care. The gym for sure is my
• 1:03:53
  Speaker 1: self care. I love it um, which is funny because
• 1:03:56
  Speaker 1: like I'm not like per Se. I'm not like a
• 1:03:58
  Speaker 1: fitness girl. Like I'm not like I look fine and Michaels,
• 1:04:01
  Speaker 1: I'm not in shape, you know what I mean, Like
• 1:04:03
  Speaker 1: but look pretty fire to me. Well thank you, but
• 1:04:05
  Speaker 1: now like thank you, I received that thank you let
• 1:04:09
  Speaker 1: me learn how to take a compliment. Thank you. Um,
• 1:04:12
  Speaker 1: just the whether it's placeable effect or not. Like the
• 1:04:14
  Speaker 1: endorphin rush from a workout, like I just kind of
• 1:04:16
  Speaker 1: set you in a great mood for the day. So
• 1:04:18
  Speaker 1: I always see like that meme going around on like
• 1:04:21
  Speaker 1: workout Instagram, which is like a one hour workout is
• 1:04:24
  Speaker 1: four percent of your day like and I'm just like
• 1:04:26
  Speaker 1: that's like it's four percent of your day, like just
• 1:04:28
  Speaker 1: and honestly, like it will reset your whole day for me,
• 1:04:30
  Speaker 1: Like it just gets your energy up, It gets your
• 1:04:32
  Speaker 1: mood up. Like you can be piste off walking in
• 1:04:35
  Speaker 1: the gym and feel great because you just gotta you know,
• 1:04:37
  Speaker 1: you open up your blood vessels and you just get
• 1:04:39
  Speaker 1: your energy moving. Um. I love a spa moment. Like
• 1:04:42
  Speaker 1: sometimes I just like I have a very physically demanding job.
• 1:04:46
  Speaker 1: Um and also like mentally, and I think like that's
• 1:04:50
  Speaker 1: something that gets discounted maybe not so much in any
• 1:04:54
  Speaker 1: job where like you're very close, but I think like
• 1:04:56
  Speaker 1: especially like in celebrity makeup, there is um and hair too,
• 1:05:01
  Speaker 1: but especially makeup just because I'm like right on someone's face. Um,
• 1:05:04
  Speaker 1: like Mabe the hair says can't hear because they have
• 1:05:06
  Speaker 1: a blow dryer on or whatever. But like me and
• 1:05:08
  Speaker 1: the client are like talking and it is a the
• 1:05:13
  Speaker 1: client like you're there to service the client, right, and
• 1:05:16
  Speaker 1: the client is getting ready to go on the red carpet,
• 1:05:19
  Speaker 1: go on television, go to a photo shoot, whatever it is.
• 1:05:22
  Speaker 1: They have to present their best face to the world. Um.
• 1:05:26
  Speaker 1: So it's almost part of your job is to make
• 1:05:28
  Speaker 1: them look but part of your job is to also
• 1:05:30
  Speaker 1: like make them feel good. Like you got to pull
• 1:05:31
  Speaker 1: someone out of you know, I've done like pieces makeup
• 1:05:35
  Speaker 1: two hours after we heard like Nipsey was murdered. I
• 1:05:39
  Speaker 1: have done um, you know, someone's makeup right when they
• 1:05:43
  Speaker 1: found out a loved one passed away, you know what
• 1:05:46
  Speaker 1: I mean. And it's it's like the interviews don't wait,
• 1:05:49
  Speaker 1: the photo shoot doesn't stop. Um. And I've had multiple publicists,
• 1:05:52
  Speaker 1: Vanessa included tell me that, you know, one thing I
• 1:05:55
  Speaker 1: love is that I can get you in there because
• 1:05:56
  Speaker 1: I also like, a I know they're gonna look great,
• 1:05:58
  Speaker 1: but be like I know that like I'm going to
• 1:06:00
  Speaker 1: get like the person that I need, you know what
• 1:06:02
  Speaker 1: I mean. Because it's like like you can't send like
• 1:06:05
  Speaker 1: a celebrity out to do an interview and they are
• 1:06:08
  Speaker 1: just closed and down or upset or that, you know
• 1:06:11
  Speaker 1: what I mean, Like you got to pull them out
• 1:06:12
  Speaker 1: of that mood so that when they walk out of
• 1:06:14
  Speaker 1: that room, they're like, Hey. The flip side of that
• 1:06:16
  Speaker 1: is that, like we said, like energy doesn't disappear, it
• 1:06:19
  Speaker 1: just exchanges. So if you're in a funk and I'm
• 1:06:22
  Speaker 1: pulling you out of it, that funk is going somewhere,
• 1:06:25
  Speaker 1: do you know what I mean. So it's a very
• 1:06:27
  Speaker 1: emotionally draining job. Sometimes people like what music do you
• 1:06:30
  Speaker 1: I'm like, yeah, I love nothing more than just getting
• 1:06:32
  Speaker 1: in my car and like turn the radio off after
• 1:06:34
  Speaker 1: a long day because I'm like everyone's been talking, I've
• 1:06:37
  Speaker 1: heard everyone's energy. It's like and I'm just like, I
• 1:06:40
  Speaker 1: just need silence before I go home to a four
• 1:06:42
  Speaker 1: year old who is chatterboxing, you know what I mean. So,
• 1:06:45
  Speaker 1: but I don't know where she gets that from anyway. Um,
• 1:06:49
  Speaker 1: but yeah, So honestly, like silence is my self care.
• 1:06:52
  Speaker 1: So if I can mix it with a massage, I
• 1:06:54
  Speaker 1: love that. Like, but people are like, do you want
• 1:06:56
  Speaker 1: to playlist for I'm like, if you could, like turn
• 1:06:58
  Speaker 1: the music totally off honestly for the massage. Like this
• 1:07:01
  Speaker 1: sounds great like your pool trinkling right now. It's such
• 1:07:05
  Speaker 1: a great sound to me, I'm like I should sleep
• 1:07:07
  Speaker 1: with a sound machine because like every time I turn
• 1:07:09
  Speaker 1: it on in my daughter's room, I'm like, this is delightful. Yeah,
• 1:07:12
  Speaker 1: it's whn you say that, because like something that I
• 1:07:14
  Speaker 1: just did for myself was I got on Amazon one
• 1:07:17
  Speaker 1: of those like a big Circle. It's from Phillip's Big Circle,
• 1:07:21
  Speaker 1: and it's like a like a daylight light, like a light,
• 1:07:26
  Speaker 1: and it's like it's gradually gets brighter to ease you
• 1:07:29
  Speaker 1: into it. I was starting to get really stressed out
• 1:07:31
  Speaker 1: setting my alarm on my phone, and even when I
• 1:07:34
  Speaker 1: try to put it on the delicate one right like
• 1:07:37
  Speaker 1: like just like a chime's, it's still jarring, like it's
• 1:07:40
  Speaker 1: still starting really abruptly, really loud. And also no matter
• 1:07:43
  Speaker 1: what sounded is, you know, it's your phone, and our
• 1:07:46
  Speaker 1: connection now to our phones is stressful. And then for
• 1:07:49
  Speaker 1: the first thing I do in order just to quiet
• 1:07:51
  Speaker 1: it is to pick up your phone, and I'm instantly
• 1:07:53
  Speaker 1: seeing alerts. I'm instantly seeing notifications, so like I have
• 1:07:56
  Speaker 1: a little sleeping bag from my phone now that I
• 1:07:58
  Speaker 1: got on this retreat that I was more that I
• 1:08:00
  Speaker 1: put it in there at a certain time. I don't
• 1:08:02
  Speaker 1: look on it until like I've woken up, done my meditation,
• 1:08:05
  Speaker 1: like started my coffee. Um, but I have really been enjoying.
• 1:08:09
  Speaker 1: I get awakened by the sound of like grasshoppers and
• 1:08:12
  Speaker 1: bird chirping, and it starts really really light. Like if
• 1:08:16
  Speaker 1: I set my alarm for like six thirty, which is
• 1:08:18
  Speaker 1: like typically in a morning, like I try to get
• 1:08:20
  Speaker 1: up a little bit before quest um, and then it'll
• 1:08:24
  Speaker 1: be a mom pro tip right there. Even if you
• 1:08:26
  Speaker 1: gave yourself like fifteen minutes until not be awakened by cries.
• 1:08:31
  Speaker 1: Is like it's such a gentler start to my day,
• 1:08:34
  Speaker 1: Like it's I'm worth it losing the sue. That's free
• 1:08:37
  Speaker 1: game right there. That's a mom bro tip right there, guys.
• 1:08:40
  Speaker 1: And so when I set my alarm to like six thirty,
• 1:08:43
  Speaker 1: right at six, the light gently starts to slowly over
• 1:08:46
  Speaker 1: thirty minutes to get to like a daylight feel, and
• 1:08:49
  Speaker 1: then the chirping starts like ten minutes before really low,
• 1:08:52
  Speaker 1: and then it's like chip chirp, chirp. Between tod and
• 1:08:55
  Speaker 1: I wake up and I feel like almost like damn
• 1:08:57
  Speaker 1: snow white, like uh, like you know, come here in
• 1:09:01
  Speaker 1: a little bird Like it's just like so lovely. I'm
• 1:09:05
  Speaker 1: just picture you're like on the back and they're like no,
• 1:09:10
  Speaker 1: like a Disney for incess. But it's like like that
• 1:09:13
  Speaker 1: to me like represents my self care right now, Like
• 1:09:16
  Speaker 1: even if I don't have time for other things, like
• 1:09:18
  Speaker 1: being able to choose the feeling I will start my
• 1:09:22
  Speaker 1: day with when I open yourself into this world is
• 1:09:26
  Speaker 1: self care. Yeah, Like I'm easing myself into the world
• 1:09:31
  Speaker 1: because it's a lot and it's like and again, like
• 1:09:33
  Speaker 1: I know, we bring up social media a lot because
• 1:09:35
  Speaker 1: it just exists and it dictates everyone's eye. But like
• 1:09:38
  Speaker 1: the access that we have now to just so much
• 1:09:40
  Speaker 1: information and so much energy, and even like Instagram is
• 1:09:44
  Speaker 1: you know, like you're like, oh, I just Twitter, and
• 1:09:46
  Speaker 1: like I'm like Instagram has like similar energy. It's like
• 1:09:48
  Speaker 1: you you want to choose what you see, and I've
• 1:09:50
  Speaker 1: set my like now the algorithm messing with you now,
• 1:09:53
  Speaker 1: so it's like not even what I want to see anyway,
• 1:09:55
  Speaker 1: it's like what I've chosen to see, and it's like
• 1:09:56
  Speaker 1: still not what I want to see anymore. I'm like,
• 1:09:58
  Speaker 1: why am I saying three day old? Like you know,
• 1:10:00
  Speaker 1: I'm like, I don't want to say this. Yeah. So yeah,
• 1:10:03
  Speaker 1: And I've set like my my alarm on Instagram and
• 1:10:06
  Speaker 1: the backroom tim I do a timer. Um, I think
• 1:10:09
  Speaker 1: my time are set to like an hour and five
• 1:10:11
  Speaker 1: minutes total right for the whole day. That's smart. So
• 1:10:14
  Speaker 1: what I love about that. Now, granted, there's some days
• 1:10:16
  Speaker 1: like where I can't sleep right, so I might be
• 1:10:18
  Speaker 1: up from four am to six am, just like staring
• 1:10:20
  Speaker 1: at the ceiling. So then like I've reached my Instagram
• 1:10:24
  Speaker 1: max by eight am, um, but to Candy Crash, I
• 1:10:31
  Speaker 1: got hit me. But now like I've like like, now
• 1:10:35
  Speaker 1: I've kind of if I So I start my day
• 1:10:37
  Speaker 1: around six thirty um, and now I'm making it without
• 1:10:42
  Speaker 1: my alarm going off till about six pm. So that
• 1:10:45
  Speaker 1: means like I'm not really on Instagram, and when I am,
• 1:10:48
  Speaker 1: I'm probably like posting my own stories or my own stuff. Um,
• 1:10:52
  Speaker 1: but it's probably like I don't know what this math
• 1:10:55
  Speaker 1: is gonna be wrong, but it's just an example, guys,
• 1:10:57
  Speaker 1: But it might break down to like four minutes out
• 1:10:59
  Speaker 1: of three hour during that day, like I I scrolled.
• 1:11:02
  Speaker 1: You know, what I would say is like the great
• 1:11:04
  Speaker 1: thing I've noticed since moving from New York to l
• 1:11:06
  Speaker 1: A Is I don't spend my time so much on
• 1:11:08
  Speaker 1: the back of a lift anymore. I'm like, my phone
• 1:11:11
  Speaker 1: screen time in general is just way down because that's
• 1:11:13
  Speaker 1: that our commute that used to be to Midtown. I'm
• 1:11:16
  Speaker 1: now driving that myself, so obviously I can't scroll. So
• 1:11:19
  Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, my screen time is way down. Like
• 1:11:21
  Speaker 1: for me, it's like if I'm on set and it's
• 1:11:23
  Speaker 1: just like hours and hours of takes. I'm just like, Okay,
• 1:11:27
  Speaker 1: I'm just open Instagram because let me just yeah, or
• 1:11:30
  Speaker 1: I'm going to jump out of window like one or
• 1:11:32
  Speaker 1: the other. But yeah, Instagram has this positive especially now
• 1:11:36
  Speaker 1: that I've like really filtered my follows. Like all I
• 1:11:39
  Speaker 1: see when I'm on Instagram is my close friends or
• 1:11:43
  Speaker 1: like funny like therapy jargon or like you know, like
• 1:11:47
  Speaker 1: different like d I Y videos or like self help
• 1:11:50
  Speaker 1: like stuff. So when I'm on it, like I'm actually
• 1:11:52
  Speaker 1: getting like a lot of ideas like to channel my creativity.
• 1:11:56
  Speaker 1: I'm getting like nourished and fed. I don't I don't
• 1:11:59
  Speaker 1: follow any of like the gossip pages, but I also
• 1:12:01
  Speaker 1: blocked all the gossip pages. That's because then it keeps
• 1:12:05
  Speaker 1: them off my Yeah, it changes it. So I don't
• 1:12:08
  Speaker 1: see when people post stuff like that, like even that
• 1:12:10
  Speaker 1: I follow, and it also doesn't ever come up on
• 1:12:13
  Speaker 1: my explore feed. So like if we were to open
• 1:12:14
  Speaker 1: my g right now on my explore feed, the only
• 1:12:17
  Speaker 1: things that you would see is like like therapy talk
• 1:12:21
  Speaker 1: um home transformation like I love, like like pages like
• 1:12:24
  Speaker 1: the Jungalow or like you know, home to Core and
• 1:12:27
  Speaker 1: Crystals and that's it, or like d I y videos
• 1:12:30
  Speaker 1: of like BuzzFeed tasty, you know, like and that's it.
• 1:12:33
  Speaker 1: So is there any area of like self self care,
• 1:12:38
  Speaker 1: self help, spiritual that that is cringe e to you though?
• 1:12:42
  Speaker 1: Like are there people that sort of like self spirituality
• 1:12:45
  Speaker 1: that's cringe e? Because for me, I follow a million
• 1:12:48
  Speaker 1: makeup artists that I think are phenomenal, Like I follow
• 1:12:52
  Speaker 1: intentionally like beautifully inspiring editorial makeup artists and makeup artists
• 1:12:57
  Speaker 1: I admire or anything like that, And then which my
• 1:13:00
  Speaker 1: Explore page thinks means I want to see you know,
• 1:13:05
  Speaker 1: ultra light beam highlight like noses and cheeks with like
• 1:13:10
  Speaker 1: seventeen color Macro I close up, which like no shade guy, Like,
• 1:13:15
  Speaker 1: if you do that makeup, I'm a dent. I think
• 1:13:18
  Speaker 1: it's an amazing skill and precision. Um, it's just like
• 1:13:23
  Speaker 1: not necessarily like what I want to see on my
• 1:13:25
  Speaker 1: Explore page as far as like, um, creative inspiration. It's
• 1:13:29
  Speaker 1: just more like an amazing technical skill. If you click
• 1:13:33
  Speaker 1: on those when you're on your Explore page on the
• 1:13:35
  Speaker 1: top right, you can click those dots and say, see
• 1:13:38
  Speaker 1: less of this, that's what I need. So I've done that, um,
• 1:13:42
  Speaker 1: not recently because I kind of like mastered my page now,
• 1:13:44
  Speaker 1: like my Explorer page, but I did that before, especially
• 1:13:47
  Speaker 1: when stuff would pop up that really didn't even like
• 1:13:50
  Speaker 1: fit into stuff I cared about in my wheelhouse at all.
• 1:13:53
  Speaker 1: But there's definitely something that comes on and I'm like, what,
• 1:13:56
  Speaker 1: why do you think I want to see this Instagram?
• 1:13:58
  Speaker 1: What in the algorithm based on will you follow? Okay?
• 1:14:00
  Speaker 1: Everyone needs to be edited. I think, like I think
• 1:14:03
  Speaker 1: with every field, and this absolutely includes like the spirituality field.
• 1:14:07
  Speaker 1: There as with everything, there's gonna be like the light
• 1:14:10
  Speaker 1: and dark, there's gonna be the levels to it. So
• 1:14:12
  Speaker 1: like even within because now, especially like positivity is so
• 1:14:17
  Speaker 1: on trend. Spirituality is so on trend and mainstream in
• 1:14:20
  Speaker 1: certain ways. You're gonna get your levels of it. You're
• 1:14:22
  Speaker 1: gonna get you're gonna get the great, amazing, you're gonna
• 1:14:27
  Speaker 1: get the good, You're gonna get the fair, You're gonna
• 1:14:29
  Speaker 1: get the mediocre, the bad, and the god awful. And
• 1:14:33
  Speaker 1: that's in every field. That's with every type of industry,
• 1:14:37
  Speaker 1: every type of product. So yeah, I mean when I'm
• 1:14:39
  Speaker 1: on there, I definitely see a lot of BS positivity.
• 1:14:43
  Speaker 1: I see a lot of like passive aggressive positivity. I
• 1:14:46
  Speaker 1: see a lot of like um people marketing not dealing
• 1:14:52
  Speaker 1: with their problems as like I'm not doing things that
• 1:14:55
  Speaker 1: don't serve me, and it's like, well, no, you're just
• 1:14:57
  Speaker 1: continuing your pattern of avoidance you. But then at the
• 1:15:01
  Speaker 1: same time, I'm not a judgment of it, because we're
• 1:15:03
  Speaker 1: all growing at our own pace. So if that's you
• 1:15:06
  Speaker 1: in your life, that's okay, that's my family. Like those pages,
• 1:15:09
  Speaker 1: I am so glad and that's how I feel like
• 1:15:13
  Speaker 1: this is this is not a competition for me, Like
• 1:15:15
  Speaker 1: I an Instagram page like that and that style of
• 1:15:18
  Speaker 1: makeup and someone doing makeup on themselves or or that
• 1:15:22
  Speaker 1: look that's not what I do when we're not competing
• 1:15:25
  Speaker 1: for anything. Um. And again, like I don't think I'm
• 1:15:28
  Speaker 1: never like, oh you're whack, You're not gonna where I'm like.
• 1:15:30
  Speaker 1: I think that like the skill and the precision that
• 1:15:33
  Speaker 1: those looks take is like, um, like I don't even
• 1:15:36
  Speaker 1: have the patience for that precision. Um, I just have
• 1:15:39
  Speaker 1: a different aesthetic, you know. I kind of think that,
• 1:15:41
  Speaker 1: like our imperfections are kind of what makes us beautiful.
• 1:15:44
  Speaker 1: And I think that, you know, sometimes these weirdly precise
• 1:15:47
  Speaker 1: photos are they just like a little weirdly robotic and
• 1:15:50
  Speaker 1: android ish to me where I'm like, okay, like very
• 1:15:53
  Speaker 1: artistic and creative, um, but maybe just not like for me.
• 1:15:57
  Speaker 1: So yeah, I think I need to just click the
• 1:15:59
  Speaker 1: c less of this because my Explore page is, um
• 1:16:03
  Speaker 1: what's the site? It is colorful? I'm like, wow. So
• 1:16:10
  Speaker 1: before before we wrap up and get out of here, UM,
• 1:16:12
  Speaker 1: I like to ask everybody if you have any book suggestions,
• 1:16:17
  Speaker 1: podcast suggestions, or things that are on your radar that
• 1:16:20
  Speaker 1: some of the folks listening might want to write down
• 1:16:22
  Speaker 1: real quick. Oh wow, I should have researched this question
• 1:16:26
  Speaker 1: before I came. Okay, Um, true life confession. I until
• 1:16:30
  Speaker 1: like a year ago, didn't even know what a podcast was.
• 1:16:33
  Speaker 1: Sean had to tell me. I was like, what's that.
• 1:16:34
  Speaker 1: He's like, you literally have an app on your phone
• 1:16:37
  Speaker 1: you can listen. And I was like, what is this?
• 1:16:38
  Speaker 1: He was like, because that's when I first got Last
• 1:16:40
  Speaker 1: Night People Talking. Um yeah, So I actually am like
• 1:16:44
  Speaker 1: not a huge podcast person podcasts. No, although um, I
• 1:16:48
  Speaker 1: do love and I have been a guest on this podcast,
• 1:16:50
  Speaker 1: so I'm probably biased, but um My Leaks podcast taught
• 1:16:54
  Speaker 1: yeah fire every time I've listened to it, it's amazing.
• 1:16:57
  Speaker 1: And also this girl lived Perez Friend of a Friend
• 1:17:00
  Speaker 1: podcast is great and that's yeah. And then your podcast obviously,
• 1:17:04
  Speaker 1: which guys aren't listening to. What's like a favorite book
• 1:17:09
  Speaker 1: of yours over the years. Okay, so I have I'm
• 1:17:13
  Speaker 1: a bookworm. I'm a nerd. I've been reading my whole life.
• 1:17:16
  Speaker 1: My mom is an author. Um and I run the
• 1:17:19
  Speaker 1: gamut from like really like nonfiction works to like complete
• 1:17:24
  Speaker 1: like my trash reading is like historical fiction. Like you
• 1:17:27
  Speaker 1: gave me anything about the Tutors, I'm obsessed with it.
• 1:17:29
  Speaker 1: So I'm gonna give you like a range. Because someone
• 1:17:32
  Speaker 1: just the other day literally yesterday, I think on Twitter
• 1:17:34
  Speaker 1: it was a writer who said I need a palate cleanser.
• 1:17:36
  Speaker 1: She's like, I need a book that's going to keep
• 1:17:38
  Speaker 1: me like super engaged that I don't have to think
• 1:17:40
  Speaker 1: about at all, but I just want to be super
• 1:17:42
  Speaker 1: entertained by it and like toss it, which I almost
• 1:17:45
  Speaker 1: take to think is like a beach read. But by
• 1:17:47
  Speaker 1: the way, to your point, there's like levels to a beatree,
• 1:17:49
  Speaker 1: because there's like some really crappy beach reads out there.
• 1:17:52
  Speaker 1: One that I'm obsessed with. I don't even know if
• 1:17:54
  Speaker 1: it's in print anymore, but I think you can find it.
• 1:17:55
  Speaker 1: It's called Bringing Home the Birken. Maybe it's like my
• 1:17:58
  Speaker 1: fashion thing I'm obsessed with. It's a story about this
• 1:18:01
  Speaker 1: is like before online shopping and things like that. It's
• 1:18:04
  Speaker 1: like a story about how this guy basically made himself
• 1:18:07
  Speaker 1: a millionaire finding the coveted broken bag for rich women
• 1:18:11
  Speaker 1: around the world who couldn't get their hands on it.
• 1:18:13
  Speaker 1: He like unlocked the secret. How or mez would sell
• 1:18:15
  Speaker 1: you a broken back because even now if you go
• 1:18:17
  Speaker 1: into like intermed store, you can't just walk in and
• 1:18:18
  Speaker 1: say I want to buy a broken he like knows
• 1:18:20
  Speaker 1: the secret he knows how to do it, and he
• 1:18:22
  Speaker 1: like it's it's just like a fun read. You know,
• 1:18:25
  Speaker 1: you can read in a couple of hours. It's super fun.
• 1:18:27
  Speaker 1: So I always recommend to Bringing Home the Broken Michael Tinello.
• 1:18:32
  Speaker 1: I only remember the name. It's a fun read. Like
• 1:18:35
  Speaker 1: the last couple of years, I just read so many
• 1:18:38
  Speaker 1: like heavy books like theology, philosophy. Like I'm in the
• 1:18:42
  Speaker 1: middle right now. Yeah, I've never read it. Um, I'm
• 1:18:48
  Speaker 1: like struggling to get into it though, and everyone has
• 1:18:51
  Speaker 1: raved about it. I'm like, sometimes it's some of those
• 1:18:54
  Speaker 1: books like you have to just it has to be
• 1:18:57
  Speaker 1: the right timing, you know, Like because I like one
• 1:18:59
  Speaker 1: of the books that is my go to and I
• 1:19:01
  Speaker 1: talked about this on my I G t V. The
• 1:19:03
  Speaker 1: Untethered Soul. That book is like that book revolutionized my life. Right,
• 1:19:09
  Speaker 1: But the first four chapters I wanted to peel my
• 1:19:13
  Speaker 1: skin off, Like I was just reading it and I
• 1:19:15
  Speaker 1: was like, this is agonizing, this what are you talking about?
• 1:19:20
  Speaker 1: But then by the fifth chapter, I was like engulfed,
• 1:19:23
  Speaker 1: and it just sometimes you just have to push through
• 1:19:26
  Speaker 1: certain chapters or you need to put it down completely
• 1:19:28
  Speaker 1: and try again next month. That's what I'm like, I'm like,
• 1:19:30
  Speaker 1: I put it down. I'm like, I'm gonna pick it
• 1:19:32
  Speaker 1: up again because I really want to read it because
• 1:19:33
  Speaker 1: people grave about it and it's so funny because Seawan
• 1:19:36
  Speaker 1: doesn't read a ton and it's like his dog eared
• 1:19:39
  Speaker 1: really so I'm like, I got the lifestyle. Okay, we
• 1:19:42
  Speaker 1: gotta go. We're like way over, Okay. I love you
• 1:19:46
  Speaker 1: so much. I think you are so brilliant and so incredible,
• 1:19:50
  Speaker 1: and you're just one of the most effortlessly interesting and
• 1:19:54
  Speaker 1: fascinating people. Oh my god, and you always have great
• 1:19:56
  Speaker 1: recommendations about everything, because I'm the mail show. Oh my God.
• 1:20:03
  Speaker 1: To return on Twitter and Instagram at Joanna Simpkin and
• 1:20:09
  Speaker 1: we'll be back in a couple of weeks. Peace later,
• 1:20:13
  Speaker 1: big Thank you for listening to this episode of The
• 1:20:15
  Speaker 1: Dropping Gym's podcast. This show is executive produced by Adrian
• 1:20:19
  Speaker 1: Scott and me Debbie Brown. Our theme music was created
• 1:20:23
  Speaker 1: by producer Day one, and the poem that you heard
• 1:20:25
  Speaker 1: at the beginning of the show, well, that was created
• 1:20:27
  Speaker 1: especially for us by award winning poet and I'mbie Oka four.
• 1:20:30
  Speaker 1: If you have a quick moment right now, please hit
• 1:20:32
  Speaker 1: subscribe on the show and if you like what you heard,
• 1:20:35
  Speaker 1: take it a step further and give us a five
• 1:20:37
  Speaker 1: star rating. Until next time you connect with me on
• 1:20:40
  Speaker 1: I g at Debbie Brown or my website Debbie Brown
• 1:20:43
  Speaker 1: dot com, be blessed,