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I Used To Be So Poor | Coffee With Kenny · Kenny Wallace Media

• 0:02
  Happy Sunday morning, everybody, from a beautiful downtown
• 0:07
  Concord, NH 0. No, hold on, Hold on.
• 0:13
  We got to fix this up right away.
• 0:17
  Let's get this fixed up. Here we go.
• 0:21
  Oh, yeah, baby. Oh yeah.
• 0:34
  Same decal I used yesterday at the airport.
• 0:38
  Let's take a look at the downtown Concord, NH Beautiful
• 0:45
  town beautiful town Concord, NH. I really like this very
• 0:50
  contemporary building over there.
• 0:53
  It says the friendly toast. Look here, they have a Chrome
• 0:58
  trailer up top there must be a strong building.
• 1:01
  They were partying down there last night.
• 1:04
  Just a singing. But it's a really nice little
• 1:07
  town. They've really fixed conquered
• 1:12
  up. It's about so it is about 63640
• 1:24
  in the morning. I don't know why I'm up so
• 1:27
  early. Little comedy this morning.
• 1:30
  Little comedy this morning. I've been using that word
• 1:32
  lately. Lately, a lot lately.
• 1:35
  Well, that was a tongue twister. I've been using that word a lot
• 1:39
  lately. A little bit of comedy.
• 1:45
  So I get up on this Sunday morning and I start scrolling
• 1:51
  social media and there's this one guy just out of nowhere.
• 1:57
  By the way, I didn't have anything to say until I saw this
• 2:00
  I thought was as good. This guy on X it seemed to maybe
• 2:06
  a West Coast guy cuz it, it said three hours ago.
• 2:09
  So that would have been like 3:30 in the morning.
• 2:12
  He said, I used to like you Wallace until he started
• 2:15
  bragging about how wealthy you were.
• 2:19
  I thought, wow, that came out of nowhere, but he felt the need to
• 2:25
  say it. It really bothered him.
• 2:27
  So I'm assuming he listened to one of my stories a couple years
• 2:30
  ago about how I made it. I said, OK, so you didn't like
• 2:37
  the story about how I made it, so I'll tell you a story about
• 2:41
  how I was poor comedy. Now it's sad that we have to
• 2:47
  tell people, hey, this is comedy.
• 2:49
  Instead of just saying it, we're thinking now.
• 2:52
  Now it's bothering me. Hold on.
• 2:55
  Changing stories. Now it's bothering me that the
• 2:57
  Sunoco. Now I got to hold the cup crook.
• 2:59
  If I hold it level, then the Sunoco logo is crooked.
• 3:02
  But we're just going to leave it like that.
• 3:04
  True stories. Here we go.
• 3:07
  I was going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say to you,
• 3:10
  I'm going to go. I'm so poor.
• 3:11
  And then all of you go, how poor were you?
• 3:15
  OK, Ready. I was so poor.
• 3:23
  How poor were you? I was so poor that I was afraid
• 3:30
  to ask my dad for a dollar. My dad, Russ, he'd say, what the
• 3:34
  hell you need a dollar for? And I'm like, I'm never asking
• 3:38
  him again for money. So I used to, you know, mom
• 3:41
  would buy sodas, you know, years ago and then late 60s, early
• 3:45
  70s, I was born in 63. So we're in Arnold, MO and I
• 3:50
  would take my soda bottles, the glass ones years ago.
• 3:55
  Remember you could turn soda bottles in and get $0.05 a
• 3:58
  piece. Well, when, when we ran out of
• 4:03
  soda bottles at the house. Now I'm not proud, I'm not proud
• 4:05
  of this, but I, I had to get money 'cause I was not going to
• 4:09
  ask my dad for money. So I would go down to the
• 4:12
  subdivision and I would find soda bottles that were
• 4:17
  accidentally left on people's porches.
• 4:22
  Now I took my little my little bicycle and I would carry a six
• 4:29
  pack. Look here I'd be on, I'd be on a
• 4:31
  bicycle like this. I'd take a six pack and put
• 4:35
  right on. I had AI had one of those huffy
• 4:38
  seats, you know, a long seat because I'd pull wheelies and
• 4:43
  those are the seats that you pulled willies with the long
• 4:45
  ones so you could sit at the back.
• 4:47
  And so I take that 6 pack like this and I'd put the I'd put the
• 4:52
  six pack between my legs. Then I'd go in inside the little
• 4:59
  race shop we had and I'd find some tape and I would tape soda
• 5:04
  bottles all over my bicycle. True story.
• 5:09
  It's Sunday, it's the day of the Lord, OK?
• 5:13
  And I'd ride that baby about 3 miles at least to the 711 up
• 5:18
  there by Church Street used to be a 711.
• 5:21
  Everybody knows where it was in Arnold.
• 5:24
  You all know where Church Street is.
• 5:26
  That was behind where Lowe's is right now.
• 5:28
  And there used to be a 711 right there.
• 5:31
  And I'd take all my bottles in there and I'm, I done tape them
• 5:35
  and I'd get $0.05 a piece. I'd get my dollar 50, whatever
• 5:40
  it was. And then I'd go to A&W.
• 5:42
  Me and my buddy Monty Kincaid, we'd go to A&W and we'd get us a
• 5:47
  hamburger, French fries and, and a Coke.
• 5:51
  Of course. You know, normal hamburger,
• 5:54
  small French fries, small Coke. I was in tall cotton, had myself
• 5:59
  $1.50, whatever it was. I was so poor.
• 6:08
  How poor were you, Herman? I was so poor that my dad said
• 6:14
  to me, Herman, you can't race, you don't have any money.
• 6:20
  Well, remember that. Don't stop me, I'm going to make
• 6:23
  happen. I knew I didn't have any money,
• 6:25
  but when I travelled with Rusty, I met a lot of people.
• 6:29
  I met Phil Homer, who was in charge of Goodyear.
• 6:33
  I met George Gillespie. Who ran Pro Racing shocks?
• 6:38
  I met somebody at MSD ignition boxes and I would I would get
• 6:44
  all their phone numbers when I was about 12-14 years old.
• 6:47
  You got to remember I was a crew member in ASA.
• 6:51
  They let me in the pits because Rusty tell Becky and Rex
• 6:54
  Robbins, Herman changes my tires.
• 6:58
  I don't care what we got to do if I got to sign a release, but
• 7:01
  Herman's changing my tires. Me and Paul Andrews.
• 7:04
  So here I am, Rusty, leading Milwaukee in AU sack race.
• 7:09
  Had to sign a release. Remember Billy Saxon?
• 7:11
  He ran U sack. Here I am coming around the car
• 7:15
  like not maybe 14 years old, changing damn tires.
• 7:21
  So I'd meet all these people and when it came time for me to
• 7:23
  race, I was so poor. How poor were you, Herman, that
• 7:29
  I'd call these people up. I'd say, hey, Phil, Homer, could
• 7:32
  I get some tires? Oh, Herman, you're a good kid.
• 7:37
  Thank you, Phil. George Gillespie, he give me
• 7:40
  shots, MSD give me ignition boxes.
• 7:43
  Thank God for John Child's child's tower.
• 7:46
  If it weren't for John, John bought my framing cage from
• 7:49
  Dylan. Thank God for my dad.
• 7:52
  He put, he put up a like a 5 or $10,000 CD as collateral.
• 7:58
  And I went to the bank and I borrowed money and I bought an
• 8:01
  old newspaper delivery truck, the Globe Democrat.
• 8:05
  And I bought that truck and then I pimped that thing out on the
• 8:09
  inside. John put tires on it 'cause he
• 8:11
  owned a tire store. There's way more stories, my
• 8:18
  friend who said I don't like it 'cause you brag about how
• 8:21
  wealthy you are, you're most likely talking about when I told
• 8:25
  you stories about how poor I was.
• 8:27
  I wished I was shot in the ass with diamonds like some of my
• 8:30
  friends were. But I grew up very middle class,
• 8:34
  very middle class. Shame on you.
• 8:36
  Shame on you for saying I used to listen to you, Herman, but I
• 8:41
  don't like it when you brag on you.
• 8:44
  There's a difference. Telling you when, when I didn't
• 8:46
  have anything and what I did to make it.
• 8:50
  All right, everybody, I'll see you at Trackside LIVE at 11:00,
• 8:55
  right next to the tunnel. And I want you to yell out,
• 8:59
  Herman, how poor were you? May the Lord be with you all.
• 9:06
  Happy Sunday, everybody.