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129: It's a Hot Rod iPod! · Hemispheric Views

• Jason. Yes. Do you have KFC? Yes. We have both KFC and Kentucky Fried Chicken. We have both. We've probably talked about this before, but what do you call it? I would call it Kentucky Fried Chicken. Okay. But I think KFC, it's synonymous, I think. All right. I don't think there's an actual difference, but I'm not like a KFC expert here. So we'd have to ask the Colonel. Well, that's me in this case. So I think to my understanding. The Colonel's here. I've watched enough videos about the Colonel. I remember doing a bit of a YouTube rabbit hole about the Colonel a while ago because I was like, wow, he was on a lot of kind of Christian TV shows. Anyway, digressing. My understanding is that KFC kind of took over more, at least in Australia. That's what I've heard because fried became a bit of a dirty word. And so it all changed to KFC. But now more and more, at least in Australia, like Colonel Sanders. This is plastered on walls and Kentucky Fried Chicken and the old type faces come back and it's on the paper bags. It's kind of like a retro revisiting. That's what I've seen. There was like a myth. I'm assuming it's a myth. I don't, I didn't look too far into it, but there was a myth at one point that it was Kentucky Fried Chicken. And then they changed it to KFC because it like wasn't chicken or something. But I'm pretty sure that's not true. That seems like. Probably false, but it's a fun story. And it was actually from Tennessee. Right, exactly. It was Tennessee fried, like other, you know, in quotes. So they just said, we'll just call it KFC. We'll call it good. And I apologize because I knew this was familiar. We have talked to KFC before. I just searched it and we talked on episode 099. And that was the episode entitled Ass, Adam as a Service. Where we talked about KFC. So there you go. Oh, that's good. Yeah. And I mean, extra kernel of information for people. I am the kernel. So it wasn't just the whole topic revisited. Yeah. Here we were thinking it was a Southern gentleman in a white suit from the United States. And the whole time it's been Martin in New South Wales. Life is a lie. Truth is out. Next week, you're going to find out all 11 secret herbs and spices. Oh, sweet. Yeah, we're going to dole them out. If you're one prime plus, you're going to get all those spices doled out one at a time. Probably in sticker format. Yeah. And I want to apologize. Already hijacking the show notes. That wasn't even on the show notes. So I've already stuffed it. I'm editing. Who cares? I was listening to a song and the song title, I think it was Cowboy Gangster Politician. Put that in the show notes. That describes you. And I said. I said, that song title sounds like a geolocation using the What3Words app. Oh. And I was like, that's got to be. I reckon they've done that. And it's like an Easter egg in the song. So I used What3Words to search that location. It doesn't exist. Oh. But it got me on a tangent. I've reinstalled What3Words. And I've forgotten how cool that little app is. And I need to find reasons to use it. There's a very cool idea. Locate yourself within a three meter square radius anywhere on the planet using three different words that has been determined. And it's really good. If you want to. For instance, the KFC guy. I just saw him wandering around the front of the house trying to deliver. He couldn't find the front door. Who knew? If I had given him. If I had done the order. I could have given him the What3Words coordinate to my doorstep. Yeah. Now that would rely on him knowing what the hell What3Words is. And those three words would have been Canyon Blog Save. Right? Now, can we just clear something up here? You ordered KFC to be delivered to your home. I did not. Somebody else in the house did. I did not. Okay. But I'm hoping to eat it. This podcast is actually preventing me from eating hot KFC. I am hoping. So you're going to have soggy, cold KFC as a result of this recording. Yes. This is the level of commitment that I'm showing to you too. I would just like to throw out another tangent then, since that's the case. Before we get to the first topic, you mentioned locations. I recently learned that there is a fake location on some maps at the geolocation of 0,0 called null that people use for testing. And in some maps it shows it. I thought that was interesting. So there you go. Is it div null or just null? I think it's just null. I think. Yeah. Well, at least my geolocation doesn't include the word downtime, Jason, which has been a bit of an issue recently. Awkward. It's up now though. So it's like you can pretty much pretend like it never happened. Except when I post the picture of all of the things being up except your website. Other than that. I broke my own website. You did. And then you went to bed. I broke my website. I was trying to do a few things and I absolutely broke it. So it went. The whole thing went down. Hard. My entire life at the moment is getting up at odd times for nappy changing. So I'm not really part of the planet at the moment. Well, you could have fixed my website. Just a fact. I went to Jason. How on earth would I have done that? You could have done that at 2 a.m. During a feeding session or something. Could fix my website. So you're saying that the person who's currently on, you know, co-caring for an infant is more reliable than the guy who has a greater than corporate network in his home. Yes. Yes. Probably. Okay. I just can't be trusted. But I just want to say, you know, on the part. Thank you, Jason burk, for fixing my website. And also thank you, Manton Reese, for also fixing my website. I brought in the heavy guns and the heavy guns. Website fixed. I like that. That was finger guns for those of you that aren't watching the video feed. So should we move on to the show? Yeah, that'd be good. I. I mean, we're 10 minutes in. We might as well start, I guess. Sure. Hi, I'm Andrew. And I'm Jason. And I'm Martin. This is Hemispheric Views. So, Jason, you've got a music project update. Oh, music. I have a music project. Remember when I was complaining about streaming and I was going to consolidate everything to like non-DRM, local. If it's not in my library, it doesn't exist. I'm still doing that. Don't worry. I've not abandoned the idea. And it's going very well. I have a exquisite musical library now filled with more and more lossless DRM-free music every day. And I love it. I've never listened to more music probably ever than I have in recent weeks. And yeah, everything is running through Plex, Plex movies, Plex TV shows, Plex music. It's great. Everything's going wonderfully. I got a digital audio player today. Literally today. They knew we were recording, so they had to deliver. So I don't really have a lot to say about it yet. Because I just got it. Got it. So that should be interesting. But I'm very happy that I've made this decision and I have not looked back and it's going swimmingly. Are you a flack guy now? I'm doing all kinds of things. I'm doing flack. I'm doing high quality MP3s. I'm doing, there was another one that I found that I'm doing. I'm kind of just ripping everything in like multiple versions right now. And my new approach is that. V? No, WM something. I don't know. There's so many formats. I want to say this one. Who could know? Ogvorbis. Ogvorbis? You have to do an Ogvorbis every once in a while or else you don't really feel alive. Right? I mean, that's like, that's it. So what I'm doing is I'm taking CDs and I'm ripping them to ISOs. So just full on copies for storage for long term. Okay. Just in case. Okay. Okay. Okay. What if flack is not good in like five years and there's like a flack two, right? When you said just in case, I thought you meant that you say they play a broken unit. You'd never have any way of playing your CDs again. That would make sense. That's possible as well. What if they round up all of our CD players and take them from us as a bid to make us forced into streaming? I don't want that. So now I have ISOs of everything. Are you burning those ISOs to CD as a backup? I can't tell you because they'll hear. Wink. Wink. Wink. So music streaming or music library is going very well and I'm very happy. I've never been happier with music probably ever. I have a serious question. So are you then, if you want to play it on a stereo system, are you using an app like an iPhone app, the iPhone Plex app and air playing? Is that kind of the way you were doing this? That is correct. Yeah. So I use the Plex amp. They have a specific music thingy called Plex amp. And I use that for if I want to stream stuff. And then if I want to just chill out and listen to some tunes, I'm a big giant headphones. Got my little music player do op thing and I'm off to the races. And now I have found, get ready for this. I'm about to blow your minds. An iPod seventh gen. Okay. You're like, okay, whatever. It's an iPod. But wait, with two terabytes, a larger battery. A Taptic engine, an air tag embedded and a USB-C port instead of a 30 pin dock connector. How incredibly cool is that? It's a hot rod iPod. And the color? Oh, and it's purple. It's anodized purple. And you can pick any color wheel you want. It's incredible. I'm very excited. It's got some kind of different software on it. I don't know why it has a Taptic engine. I don't care. I want anything that has a Taptic engine in it. That thing's incredible. Do you reckon it's going to be with a haptic feedback for what would just one speaker clicks on the click wheel? That is my hope. My hope is that the wheel going around will be now a Taptic engine and feel incredible. So if you spin really, really quickly in your library going through all songs, it's going to feel like a machine gun going off in your hands. I hope so. That's, that's the hope. Yeah. And it has an air tag in it. Like what, what? People are doing wild stuff. This mod pod is very exciting. But I just, before we skip over it, what is that music player? I think that's what they're called at least unofficially. Like what is that audio player that you flashed up to us before? This is the Hi-B R3 Mark II. I got a red one. Looks good. So there you go. Music project is going strong. I went to, I went to a CD store, like a, like a used, like local place. I was there for like hours. Just. Just looking through CDs. It was amazing. They have a whole section of here's all the crap we just got that we haven't sorted yet. So like go to town. That was awesome. It was just, it was great. Next topic is quick. It's stickers. We have been getting a colossal amount of orders for the new 2025 sticker, which has been great. Happy to see. That people are wanting it and enjoying it. So those, we just sent out a big old batch earlier this week. I think it was. So keep those orders coming. If you haven't seen them, check them out. Hemisphericfuse.com slash shop. And we're about to sell out of the artwork sticker. I didn't realize our inventory manager has not been keeping up with inventory. Sorry. So those might get moved to sold out pretty soon. So yeah, get over there, get some stickers. We still got a lot. And also the episode 97 dual, the default special edition sticker is a one-time print when those are out, when those are gone, they're gone. So if you want one, get one because they are far and few between at this point, I am digging stickers out of strategic reserves at this point to, to make sure they can go out to people. So get over there. Hemisphericfuse.com/shop. Now, Andrew, looking at this next topic that you've put down, cause I can see a basketball. Are you about to admit that you actually have very short hands? Well, you know, I, we know that's, you know, I can palm an iPad. So clearly that's not the case. A 13 inch iPad. Yeah. I went just when I was buying my home pod the other day, I looked at the big iPad. What's that one called? How big that is 13, right? 13. 13. It's always been 13, regardless of what their stupid naming was. It's always been 13. It didn't strike me as that big. Like I sort of picked it up and held it. I was like, that's a good size. So says the guy was short. Yeah, but no shorthand. So I was talking the other day, I'm talking with my partner about the nerdy history of Andrew and what a weird child I was. You guys probably can't imagine that. Really? Not at all. Very odd. Really? No, it's very odd. Yeah. Fill us in. I remember with my best friend for the longest time, I would go to their house like once or twice a week to learn how to do shorthand, like stenographer style, you know, with the notepad and the pencil. Like on the little funny keyboard? I didn't have the funny keyboard. I was learning the written form. So some people had Stacy's mum and you had. Stenographer's mum. Yes. So, so Lynn, Lynn taught me shorthand for the longest time and I got pretty good at it. I could read it. I could write it. It's if you've ever looked at shorthand, probably nobody even knows what shorthand is, but basically it was a way journalists used to be able to use journalists and secretaries and things. Secretaries and transcribers. You used to use it before, before you had an iPhone that could just record audio and then use an AI engine to transcribe it. You had to capture people's speaking as they spoke. And that was too hard. You couldn't, couldn't cursive write what people wrote, but with shorthand, you could write an obscene amount of words per minute using just a pencil and a pad and a special language with forms. And it just, I don't remember even much of it now. Like I remember a couple of little symbols, but I used to be able to smash it when I was like in my early tweens. And I'm like, who else in the world did that? As like a hobby extracurricular kind of educational piece. And my hope was that it would help me in my career. Sadly, that didn't play out, but it was just a weird, it was just a weird thing. It's like, do you guys even, are you even familiar with shorthand as an art form? If you want to call it that. I already knew what it was. Yes. But I have no experience with doing it. No. So you, you, let me just paint a picture. This is a weird topic, but I just had to get off my chest. So it's a, it's a Thursday, right? School is out. Woo. Class is over. Time to kind of, you know, kick back, lay back and, you know, have some fun. You're going to go over to Tommy's house, hang out, go to Tommy's house. And you say, I'm actually just going to hang out with your mom and learn shorthand for the next three and a half hours. Cool. Like, is that how that went? It just seems like that would be a very odd scenario. Is that? Yeah. And what's Tommy doing? Is he just watching you learn this? Is he like, I'm going to go play video games like a normal 12 year old? Or like, what are we? I'm going to my other best friend's house while you're here with my mom. I'm going to go learn how to crochet over at Bobby's house with his mom. Like what's going on in Western Australia is my question. So he was, even though we were best friends, he was a couple of years older than me. And I think we were probably reaching the stage of our friendship where his couple of years older was taking him strongly into teenager. Whereas I was still tweenager. So our friendship probably had just drifted a little bit because he was probably getting into teenage things like going out and smoking behind the shed and those sorts of things. Yeah. Obviously. So I think our friendship drifted a little bit, but I had such a strong relationship with his mom that I was like, okay, well, this is something I'm interested in. So I'll just come over and hang with you for a while. So I'd ride my bike over. I'd come home from school. Like you said, I would probably watch Ninja Turtles first. Okay. That's good. And then I would head up. At their house or? No, at my house. And then I'd get on my bike and it was like a 10 minute ride. Is it a BMX bike? Yep. Yep. BMX bike. Backpack with my notepad and my erasers and my pencils in it. What kind of backpack was that? Do you recall? Was that a, was, was Jan Sport a thing there? Was that a, was that a brand? That was later. That was later. And that was. That was later. That was far too fancy and expensive. Mine would have been a Kmart one or something. Okay. Okay. It wasn't like a leather business satchel. You didn't have like a briefcase on a rope or one of your like bungee cords. When I rode my bike, my necktie would like flap over my shoulder. Oh, just in your face. You're just like. Get out of here. I had to switch to bow ties for a while. So that, yeah. Yeah. And then I would go over and I'd do my shorthand for, you know, 45 minutes. An hour, like a, like a lesson should be. And it was good. I would take, I would study it. I tried to get really good at it. I was committed. And now can you do any of it at all? Do you think? No. Like nothing. No. I think I can do the and, which is, it's like a little basket thing. It's like a little, little twizzle. Do you think maybe I'm just, this could be a stretch, but do you think at all that that ability of shorthand. Yes. Maybe helped you move. Move on to graffiti later on with the Palm Pilot. Ah, do you think that maybe there was some transition there potentially? I reckon there was, cause I do remember thinking about that at the time I had my Palm Pilot M105. So yeah, I think you're probably onto something. Okay, good. Well, see, it wasn't all for naught. You got some, you got some, some upward momentum there. I'm happy to hear that. There's a lot of basketballs. There's a lot of, well, I missed a week, so I've got a lot of catch up. You know why he's written here, not wearing my Apple watch? Cause his hands are too short. Too short. Can't fit an Apple watch. Why would I wear an Apple watch when I can wear my Casio? I still don't agree, but. Look, my, my Apple watch is a series six. It's getting to the end of life. The battery is, struggles to make it through a day. But what have we found. What are we on now? What are we on now? Are there up to a 10? 10. 10. 10. But I just found, I found that not being tapped on the wrist with messages has been a blessing. The only thing I've missed is Apple pay. That's the only thing I reckon I've missed on the Apple watch. Everything else, I don't really need it. Like weather, sure. You got a phone though, right? So you can just do it with your phone. Yeah. I do everything with my phone. It's like the old days. You bring up a great point though, like with the tapping on the wrist. Cause when I've thought about, could I survive or would I want, not could cause we all could, but would I want to live without an Apple watch? Could I survive? And yeah, like vital. Well, they keep talking about vitals, right? Health vitals. The health vitals are shot. They're gone. If you don't wear an Apple watch, Tim Cook is basically saying you're going to die. That's true. All those ads, you're going to die. If you take your Apple watch off, you're dead. Um, and we won't know about it cause you'll be dead without vitals and we'll get no story during a keynote. So how would we know? Exactly. Apple won't be notified. You'll be like a corpse somewhere. What is the point? You know, if only they had watch OS. Insert number here for the cadaver with a Casio. Um, no, what I wanted to bring up was you said the thing about not getting incessant taps. Now I feel like I have a good system for what I actually allow to notify me. I've really minimized it to the essential stuff, but I still take the point. It's tapping you and it's potentially taking you out of the moment. I'm guessing, correct me if I'm wrong, Andrew, since you've stopped wearing the Apple watch, at least for the moment, you have a ringtone that's sounding out like your phone has to make noise. No. Negative. So what happens if it's on the other side of the house or not next to you? I just miss it. And it's ringing or something. I miss it. You just miss it. It's a glorious thing. Okay. No, fair enough. I just think whenever I consider, would I want to live without an Apple watch? The idea of having to, you know, go and run to get the phone or hear a noise or whatever it might be, just annoys me greatly. Like more than the idea of taps. Phone, phone ringing. Yeah. I mean, I think that's a good point. I think that's a good point. I think that's a good point. I think that's a good point. I think that's a good point. I think that's a good point. 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Well, they're just sitting in a corner. I need to do something. I don't know how to dispose of them. They're still in really good condition. I want them to go to a good owner. I don't know how to deal with this. But I've... I've got to get rid of them. You just do what most people do, and you dump them out the front of those charity donation bins where they have the signs that say no dumping. Well, that's one solution. But they're just beautiful. They're beautiful, beautiful equipment. It's sad to see them go, but I've had them for 25 years. And I've always loved the sound. I put two HomePods in, and I was like, "This is bloody impressive." Not quite as much bass because I don't have a gigantic subwoofer. But I've got to tell you, who would have guessed in 25 years the quality of digital audio has improved somewhat. And the surround sound effect is quite good. The ability to hear vocals, I think, is better than what I was getting from the old system. I can actually make things out without turning on subtitles now. Who would have known that two HomePods... Martin, you would never have known that two HomePods would have made a good TV system. I think what you're looking for there is stereo iPod hi-fis. Pretty good news on the HomePod front. Except for not updating my spreadsheet. So, I don't know if this constitutes a new segment title, right? We'll see how it goes. But something that came up recently, speaking to Natasha, was Natasha said, "I'm not sure about this Feldfoot thing." Like the nickname that YouTube bespowed upon me for the longest time, right? I can't remember which episode it was. She said that I'm less of a person who crushes people, as the original illustration said. And it's more about sucking people into my tractor beam or force field and making them hear what I want to talk about. And I thought that was pretty interesting. She knows me quite well. So, it's like once Martin's talking, at least... Well, in this podcast, it's actually the total opposite. It's you, Andrew. But in most aspects of daily life, it's where when Martin's talking, "Oh, God, here we go. We're going to get... Strap yourselves in. You're stuck in the tractor beam." And she said, "Martin, rather than the Feldfoot, you should really be called the force field." So, I don't know how you feel about that. You know, I don't know how you feel about that. But I thought, look, I'm going to drop this in as a bit of a nugget into the show. A fact or thing that you didn't really ever need to hear, which could be of interest, maybe not, with a funny element attached to it. So, it's kind of like if you ever watched Rove in Australia, you know, Rove Live, Andrew? Yes, I do. They kind of had the what the segment. Yeah. Yeah, which was probably stolen from Letterman in another way or something. But consider this. Force field is you have to hear what I want to talk about, whether or not it's relevant to the show. And deal with it. So, on force field today, you're going to hear about Nutsy. And that is spelled N-U-T-S-Y. And it's an early birthday present that Natasha got for me, which is coffee peanut butter. Have you heard of such a product before? No, but I would eat it. Well, I can tell you it's delicious. I don't know if I'm going to be eating it on bread. It's a really small jar. Is that like a sample? Well, yeah. They might make larger ones, but I think it's just like at least a small one to try. She was like, I don't know how good it's going to be, but I'll get this for you. It was a little kind of snack thing. And it arrived. And I thought, this is quite nice. The packaging is pretty good. It's got one of those little kind of safety tag things, you know, like in case it's open. There's a bit of care put into the product packaging. Yeah, it hasn't been tampered with. But, you know, despite the fact that it tastes delicious and it's really just peanut butter with like ground up nice coffee beans in it. It was when I read the packaging, the label here. You know how a lot of products have like their story, their backstory. Their origin story. Why you should believe in the brand. What is our purpose? Right. I can't see the name of the founder, although there's a picture of him down the bottom that says founder and innovator. And I would like to read that little statement to you on the side of a plastic jar of coffee, peanut butter. And I want to know if you think this suits the food industry or something more aligned with the terminology that with the terminology that we know Jason loves sabbatical. Right. Just take this in. Just remember it's on the side of a food jar. And I quote, if you have nutsy, you're a bold individual who thinks differently and strives for success. Fuck's sake. You're unafraid to step outside the box and try something new. Always pushing boundaries and embracing innovation. Thank you. Jason's in pain. Thank you for supporting nutsy and being a part of our journey toward excellence. And discovery. Wow. What do you think of that? I don't think I can groan any louder. I think it's perfect and fits a peanut butter just so well. Look, I don't like to, I don't like to use this term lightly, but what a load of wank. Well, I have to say it's a great product. Right. And on the topic of wank, it's interesting you use that word because what are the two first letters of the word wank? W-A. And that's where this product was made. Andrew, are you the founder and innovator of nutsy? Oh. No, but tell me, where does it come from? Give me more details now. Now he's all on board. He's like, this is the best product ever made. You guys can shut up. Wattle Grove, W-A. Oh, Wattle Grove. That's not fancy place. That's, that's like, that's lowbrow. Apologies to all the listeners in Wattle Grove. You shat on the innovator. You shat on the innovator from nutsy and you shat on Wattle Grove. That's not that far away from where I grew up, which says something about the shitty location I grew up in. Ah, sorry. Wattle Grove. Anyway, thank you for joining me for force field. And that's it. Wow. Force field. Is it, is it, what can you tell me more about the peanut butter itself? Like the consistency, the flavor, like how's the coffee? Does it just have like a coffee flavor? Is there a coffee crunch? Is there what, what's. Well, it's hard probably for you to see in here. Maybe you can see through the camera and anyone who checks the links and show notes. It's kind of like it's ground up, like it's coffee grounds and it's spread through what's essentially like a kind of darker brown or medium to darker brown peanut butter because of the effect of the coffee. But you kind of have an instant coffee flavor and you can taste those kind of granules in your mouth. Fine kind of granules, but maybe thicker than what you're expecting for a spread. And then the peanut butter. And then the peanut butter comes through. So it's kind of coffee first because you go, wow, that's different. And then the peanut butter. But it's nice. I think it's good. And I'm planning on using it as more of a kind of snack food item rather than breakfast on bread because I think it would lose the effect. Okay. I'm now looking at their website made with only five ingredients. Coffee. Coffee. Well, coffee. Peanuts. Peanut butter. What are the other three? Sugar. There's an emulsifier and salt. Ah. Oh, salt. The emulsifier. And that's it. Thanks for joining me for Nutsy. In WA. Because, Andrew, you have thoughts on salad. Yeah. Yeah. Salad. So we've moved from peanut butter to salad. Just a quick question, you guys. Does salad excite you? Yes. Fuck yes. I love salad. Are you being facetious or serious? I'm being serious. I love salad. No. I love salad. You thought we were going to shit on salad because you have a problem with salad, but you've got two salad supporters. Am I right? It sounds like it. I just hear salad. I just hear salad. I'm just like, ugh. Ugh. Even if it could be- Even if it was the best salad in the world, I'm still like, salad. Ugh. I just immediately think of like lettuce and tomatoes. Well, then salads have been done incorrectly. The beauty of salad- And sorry if I'm cutting you off here, Jason. The beauty of salad- Felt foot. Felt foot. Here we go. No, force-filled. I'm pulling you into the force-filled. This isn't a crushing. This is pulling. All right. Now, the beauty of salad is that it can be light. It's like when you hug someone so tight that they literally can't breathe anymore. Yeah. Yeah. They can't breathe anymore and they pass out. It's like that. Yeah. That's more accurate. Yeah. Salad can be light or it can be heavier with protein. You can customize it because it's really essentially a mix. Think like the stir fry, right? But a salad is not fried. Okay. It's refreshing. It can have like carb elements like croutons. You can add protein like in a Caesar salad or you can have Thai beef salad. You can put chicken in it. You can have fruit salads. And the benefit of salad, particularly like recently when my mum hosted extended family Christmas lunch. She made more than one salad and she was like, people can choose what they want. Guess what? Pretty much all of the salads were eaten because it was a hot day. It was refreshing and people could choose what they wanted. So it's flexible. It can be filling, but you can also take a step back and have a bit of an interim meal thing going on. Wow. Wow. Lipped the defensive salad. Nature's broom. What do you mean? Nature's broom. Yeah. Is that not a- Oh, for your body. Yeah. Yeah. It keeps the bowels moving. No. It's like an all-brand cereal. Well, that works as well. Yeah. That's just cardboard with milk. That's not doing anything. It's- That's delicious. I'm, I'm, I'm being eating all-brand recently. I'm, I'm on a bit of an all-brand kick. So, okay. Let me get this right. So you crap on salad as a flexible genre of food, but you defend all-brand like pure- Yeah. All-brand's amazing. The little sticks. I understand. I understand how it keeps you regular. Delicious. But, but you're saying, oh, it's delicious. I'm saying, see, you have cast off every potential like meal or fruit salad on the planet in favor of like flakes of cardboard in a cardboard box. If, if you put those side by side, if you put a salad and a bowl of all-brand, I'm taking the all-brand. Jason, how do you feel about this? I'm not kidding. This is a little bit disturbing to me. No, I'm fully against that. Um, what if it, what if we, what if it was a fake salad? Like what if it was potato salad? Could you get on board with that? Or like a macaroni salad? Oh, macaroni salad. Okay. Now you're starting to win your over. Where it's just literally noodles and like mayonnaise. Or can we start there as a place to start? Okay. Yes. Yeah. And like maybe we sneak in a couple pieces of celery maybe, or like just something that's almost indistinguishable. Like it's more trouble to pick it out than to eat it. So you're like, you'll just be okay and eat it. And then you told me there's nuts in it. So I think the celery is like a nut or something like that. Yes. Yes. Yeah. There's, uh, there's, there's walnuts in it. No, there's pecans in it. There's nuts. Oh yeah. There's that. It's not celery. That's not vegetables. That's just nuts in there. You're good. Right? Okay. I'm happy with that. Okay. Yep. I just don't like a cold vegetable. Oh, that's troubling. So, so grated carrot. Do you have a problem with grated carrot? I'd rather just eat a big stick of carrot. Grated is a bit too, meh. You don't get any flavour out of it. You like hot carrots? I want a chunk of carrot. You like a hot carrot. I do like hot. Yeah. I love a roasted carrot. I love capsicum in a salad for that extra crunch. That's delicious, right? Like, I'll do it if I have to, but. Oh God. I don't know. I don't like the idea of combining. I'd rather just have a, just give me a stick of celery. Ah, okay. Now, now we get to the point. Or a stick of capsicum. Okay. This is about food touching and. Yeah. Okay. He needs a little divided plate. You would like a bento box, right? You want your salad to be deconstructed. Yeah, probably would. Not peeled. Actually not even washed. You just want the dirt on the Dutch carrot, right? Probably right, actually. I don't, I don't get myself. I don't have like an anxiety or a fear of food touching. But I like, I like the experience of it individually. Yeah. And I also like it warm. I'm always going to choose a warm, a warm salad ahead of a cold one. So, just to be clear, you eat your all brand dry in a bowl rather than mixing milk with it. Because that would tarnish the milk experience, right? No, no, no. That, that can go together. Why can that go together? I'm not complete. I'm not completely like. I think you're making up your own rules, Andrew. This is not consistent. Well, it's my life. Yeah. I can do what I want. Okay. Tell me, what do you mix into all brand then? Is it pure all brand? Are you an all brand purist? No, no. Oh. No. I sprinkle a little sugar on top. Sugar. Yep. A little bit of sugar. Okay. So, it's not healthy anymore. Tick. Yep. Just a little sugar. Just to give it. Any fruit going in there? Any fruit that would be. Nah. Nah. Can't be bothered. It's too close to a vegetable, which is a salad. So. So, you're eating, so you're eating soggy sugared cardboard for breakfast. That's what you're eating. Yes. Yes, I am. Yep. And banana on corn flakes. That's the only time you're putting fruit. Banana on corn. So, you've never had like a crunchy granola with beautiful berries and kiwi fruit or thrown in some mango or something. Anything slightly flavour some that would inspire interest at breakfast time. I just like my granola with, with yogurt. If I've got a granola, I'll put yogurt in with it. You just like everything dry. And then just eat that. But I. Well, yogurt's not dry. Well, it doesn't have the same kind. It doesn't liven things up like milk does. It doesn't add some moisture to the party. I feel it does. All right. But I don't want to add fruit to it. Okay. I just want my granola. What if it's spinach instead of like iceberg lettuce? Well, spinach, you should just put that in. You should cook that. But like, what if. I know you can put it in a salad, but. Yeah, you can. Can we just cook it? So you want wilted spinach in a refreshing cold salad? I don't think. I don't want the salad. I don't think we're going to. I just want a pile of wilted spinach. I don't think we're going to win the salad war of 2025. So, salad is a concept. Not interested. Wilted spinach on its own, a single carrot and maybe some whole grain with sugar. Okay. With dirt. With dirt. You don't like cold food. So ice cream is off the list. No, but that's a sweet. So it's okay. It's edible. So it's food. Well, I'll remember this the next time we have our next work offsite that I won't bring a salad for you specifically. I'll bring. Well, Martin will know that when we caught up, I was sure to have a warm pasta. You know, I didn't get salad. It was a cooler day. So it makes sense. Wow. That was, that was something. Roller coaster. Okay. Just to round things off in Kenyon's. Can you one more episode of him? So one more thing. If at any point in your day to day, you come across a salad that you think is palatable, let's just lower the bar way down. Could you just let us know what that salad is? Like, let's say you're somebody gives you a salad and you're like forced to eat it. I'm like, I'm going to eat it. I'm going to eat it. And you think, well, I didn't die. So I guess this was okay. Can you just let us know like what, what that salad was like? I will do that. You're probably actually close to the mark earlier when you were talking about celery and nuts and whatever. Okay. Croutons. What's that salad that, that one has, I forgot what it's called. That exact combination of celery nuts and croutons. Whatever that is. There's some, there's some salad that you can do. It's a bit like that. I can't remember. I don't pay that much attention to salad. Waldorf. That's the one. Waldorf. Yes. It's got apple in it and stuff. Yeah. Yeah. I like that because it's not really a vegetable salad. It's a fruit salad with the apple. Sweet. I knew we'd get there eventually. What about a salad bar where you could just do whatever you want? Like it's your, it's your party. You get to dress it up any way you want. Is that not enticing to you? If no, why would I go, why would I go to an entire shop that is just salad? Like can't think of anything worse. You just described his nightmare. I don't even like you on a subway. He's too many salads. Oh man. Okay. Well, did not expect that. . .