Latest / Hurdle with Emily Abbate / #HURDLEMOMENT: How to Manage Burnout & 'Break the Matrix'

Transcript

#HURDLEMOMENT: How to Manage Burnout & 'Break the Matrix' · Hurdle with Emily Abbate

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: We're also turned up in this idea of like thirty
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  Speaker 1: sixty ninety days, and we just completely outweigh what we
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: can accomplish in thirty sixty or ninety days. But I'm
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  Speaker 1: really looking at it as like what's happening in three, six,
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: and nine years. And when you start to think about
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: it like that, you recognize that some of the things
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  Speaker 1: that emotionally just might be like gutting you on the inside,
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  Speaker 1: we'll feel a lot better or you'll have resolved in
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  Speaker 1: three years, six years, or nine years.
• 0:48
  Speaker 2: Hey, everybody, Emily A body here coming to you from
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  Speaker 2: the Age Studio. You are listening to Hurdle, a wellness
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  Speaker 2: focused podcast. Reconnect with everyone from your favorite athletes and
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  Speaker 2: top experts and industry CEOs about their highest hies, toughest moments,
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  Speaker 2: and everything in between. We all go through hurdles in life,
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  Speaker 2: and my goal through these discussions is to empower you
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  Speaker 2: to better navigate yours and move with intention so that
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  Speaker 2: you can stride towards your own big potential and of
• 1:16
  Speaker 2: course have some fun along the way. You know, I
• 1:20
  Speaker 2: realized the other day that it's been a minute since
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  Speaker 2: I've had a man on the show, and I was
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  Speaker 2: so so excited to have the opportunity to sit down
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  Speaker 2: with a good friend of mine.
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  Speaker 3: His name is Nick Diodado.
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  Speaker 2: He is the VP of Relationships for Gary Vynerchek, And
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  Speaker 2: this kind of all came to be, and we talk
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  Speaker 2: about this in today's episode because I was thinking.
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  Speaker 3: About how hectic this.
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  Speaker 2: Man's schedule can be, and when someone works as hard
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  Speaker 2: as Nick does, and he is very fortunate that his
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  Speaker 2: work is entirely fueled by passion and purpose and excitement
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  Speaker 2: and good vibes, would certainly be prone to burnout. And
• 2:03
  Speaker 2: so I was on a walk the other day, like
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  Speaker 2: I say in the episode, and pitched him on the
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  Speaker 2: idea of chatting about how he staves off burnout. And
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  Speaker 2: here we are, lucky for me, the now Miami resident,
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  Speaker 2: we went when both Nick and his partner lived in
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  Speaker 2: New York City. Nick was up here visiting New York.
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  Speaker 2: Quoble to sit down here in the studio together and
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  Speaker 2: have a really, really great chat. Like I mentioned, we
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  Speaker 2: are talking about burnout, how to handle overwhelming to do lists,
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  Speaker 2: and what I love about the combo is Nick's sharing
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  Speaker 2: his real strategies. He's talking about his approach that has
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  Speaker 2: helped him get through some really difficult moments, and that
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  Speaker 2: is what he calls.
• 2:43
  Speaker 3: Breaking the matrix. We're going to talk about what that is.
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  Speaker 2: If you are a subscriber to the weekly Hurdle newsletter,
• 2:49
  Speaker 2: then you may already be in the loop.
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  Speaker 3: And how to go about doing that. How to go
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  Speaker 3: about breaking the matrix. A huge thank you to Nick
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  Speaker 3: for his time.
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  Speaker 2: He also makes a really exciting call out, let's say,
• 3:03
  Speaker 2: for a role that he is trying to fill. He's
• 3:05
  Speaker 2: trying to hire for It sounds like an absolute dream.
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  Speaker 2: So make sure you listen all the way through this
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: episode and hit him up if it feels right for you.
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: Make sure you.
• 3:14
  Speaker 3: Are following along with Hurdle over on social media. It's
• 3:18
  Speaker 3: at Hurdle Podcast.
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  Speaker 2: I am over at Emily a body, and I am
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: asking you a favor. And I say this often. I
• 3:24
  Speaker 2: ask this often, but I really mean it. Because we
• 3:29
  Speaker 2: are dwindling down. I need listener questions. I want listener
• 3:33
  Speaker 2: questions about anything. It can be a question about work.
• 3:38
  Speaker 2: It can be a question about dating. It can be
• 3:41
  Speaker 2: a question about how to upkeep a fitness routine. It
• 3:44
  Speaker 2: can be a question about female friendships. It can be
• 3:47
  Speaker 2: a question about relationships with your parents.
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  Speaker 3: I mean goodness.
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  Speaker 2: I can come up with tons of question thought prompts,
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  Speaker 2: et cetera. But I am speaking directly to you, the hurdler,
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: asking you if you love the content that I put
• 4:03
  Speaker 2: out that helped me make more of it by giving me.
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  Speaker 3: Something a jam about.
• 4:08
  Speaker 2: When it comes to both the Five Minute Friday episodes,
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  Speaker 2: I answer our listener question in each and every one
• 4:13
  Speaker 2: of those and also upcoming dedicated Listener Questions episodes.
• 4:18
  Speaker 3: The link to ask me a question slash leave me a.
• 4:22
  Speaker 2: Voice message is in the show notes. And with that,
• 4:27
  Speaker 2: let's get to hurtling. Nick Diodado in the studio today.
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  Speaker 2: He is the VP of Relationships for the One, the Only,
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  Speaker 2: Gary Vaynerchuk and an old friend of mine.
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  Speaker 3: How are you doing today, Nick?
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  Speaker 4: I'm doing fantastic.
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  Speaker 1: Like I said, I'm back in New York, just landed
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  Speaker 1: forty five minutes ago, got an uber. I love the
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  Speaker 1: whimsical and fast paced of this, so it feels good
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  Speaker 1: to be back.
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  Speaker 2: I's it's funny to hear you say that, as though
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  Speaker 2: you don't live in Miami, which certainly can have a
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  Speaker 2: fast cadence within itself.
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  Speaker 4: It's just different.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, it's just I mean, like for anybody listening
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  Speaker 1: that's not New York City or Miami. Like everybody knows
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  Speaker 1: New York City. Just like the energy here East Coast energy,
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  Speaker 1: I think, just in general is very different than anywhere
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  Speaker 1: else in the country.
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  Speaker 4: Or the world. But Miami, I mean palm you know
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  Speaker 4: what I think it is.
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  Speaker 1: It's palm trees. If you've got palm trees around you,
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  Speaker 1: it's just a little bit more calming. Yeah, whereas New
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  Speaker 1: York City doesn't have trees. Yeah, so like it's just different.
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  Speaker 3: There are some trees.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, there's like a tree that a dog peas on
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  Speaker 1: every single day forty seven times. Wow.
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  Speaker 2: So the hurdlers are going to start messaging me already
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  Speaker 2: and being like, mass so much funnier than you are.
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  Speaker 2: Please have him back on the show more regularly. I
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  Speaker 2: was texting with Nick last week. I guess some context
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  Speaker 2: as to why we're sitting down here today, besides the
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  Speaker 2: fact that I just like an excuse to stare you
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  Speaker 2: directly in the eye. I was texting with Nick last
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  Speaker 2: week about something or another, and I was on a
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  Speaker 2: nice little walk around the neighborhood, and I thought to myself,
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  Speaker 2: how does this guy manage not hating his life every
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  Speaker 2: now and again in that this man is so busy.
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  Speaker 2: I mean, you said you got off a plane. You
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  Speaker 2: showed up here like within an hour. Very impressive timing.
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  Speaker 2: Also great on time arrival. Delta Does Delta get a
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  Speaker 2: shout out for this?
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  Speaker 4: Uh? Teeterborough gets a shout out for this one.
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  Speaker 2: Okay, but you're in New York now. You were just
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  Speaker 2: in Puerto Rico. Before that, you were.
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  Speaker 1: I was in Miami, but in La Briefly, the travel
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  Speaker 1: schedule has just been a big blur since January. First,
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  Speaker 1: I got COVID over Christmas. I was like, thank God.
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  Speaker 1: Now I am literally going to travel as hard and
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  Speaker 1: as much as I can until I get COVID again.
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  Speaker 1: Then I'll take two weeks off. Yep, I'll you know,
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  Speaker 1: and then I'm good for another And I.
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  Speaker 2: Feel as though that's the mentality on behalf of a
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  Speaker 2: lot of people. So anyway, you're crazy, busy all over
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  Speaker 2: the place. Busy's not one of my favorite words.
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  Speaker 4: But these are busy.
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  Speaker 3: Right.
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  Speaker 4: It's a decision to be busy. Okay, yes you can.
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  Speaker 4: If you're a.
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  Speaker 1: Thoughtful and intelligent person, you shouldn't consume yourself with menial
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  Speaker 1: tasks that don't give you purpose and don't feed your soul.
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  Speaker 1: If you enjoy what you do thoroughly, you can cram
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  Speaker 1: in as much as you want to in today and
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  Speaker 1: squeeze out every minute and.
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  Speaker 4: Feel fulfilled and grateful. But for people that.
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  Speaker 1: Are stressed out and categorize themselves as busy, I don't
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  Speaker 1: think they truly understand the meaning of what they're doing.
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  Speaker 3: Right. Okay, so we don't love the word busy.
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  Speaker 1: We by collective we, you and I. Maybe the hurdlers
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  Speaker 1: don't either. I'd like to see a vote on that.
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  Speaker 1: Do we like the word busy?
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  Speaker 2: Well, we'll put an Instagram pull up on that. So
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  Speaker 2: we don't like the word busy. But what it is
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  Speaker 2: is that you have a lot of items on your
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  Speaker 2: daily action list.
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  Speaker 3: Correct.
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  Speaker 1: It's disgusting, Yeah, because the two items like the number
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  Speaker 1: four and seven, they just like you would say them
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  Speaker 1: aloud and you'd be like, in what world do you
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  Speaker 1: need to understand what a franchising lightning agreement looks like
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  Speaker 1: in Albuquerque, New Mexico, and need to book a top
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  Speaker 1: five DJ for a private party in South Beach, Like
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  Speaker 1: you just like wouldn't understand why those two things would
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  Speaker 1: co exist on the same to do list.
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  Speaker 3: Right, But those are things that can be on your
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  Speaker 3: to do list.
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  Speaker 2: So all of this all of this to say that
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  Speaker 2: there are often a lot of tasks to get done,
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  Speaker 2: and somehow you keep showing up and waking up every
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  Speaker 2: morning and figuring out a way to check things off
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  Speaker 2: the list day in and day out. Which is why
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  Speaker 2: I had this lot on my walk that I wanted
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  Speaker 2: to have you sitting here with me, because so many
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  Speaker 2: of us, especially over the last two year years, have
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  Speaker 2: seriously struggled with the concept of burnout, and even with
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  Speaker 2: things that we are passionate about, have arrived at a
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  Speaker 2: place where it just feels like I need to throw
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  Speaker 2: my hands up in the air and take a long
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  Speaker 2: exhale and take a long look in the mirror and
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  Speaker 2: be like, what am I doing here? And what is
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  Speaker 2: the capacity that I have? So that's kind of the pretense,
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  Speaker 2: that's kind of the the why behind while we're here
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  Speaker 2: and now I want to learn a little bit from
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  Speaker 2: you because I feel like it's a really good opportunity
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  Speaker 2: and an opportunity that is to be shared.
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  Speaker 4: I love it.
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  Speaker 1: Okay, I've got some really interesting thoughts. I think on
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  Speaker 1: this topic. And when you texted me, I almost like
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: I almost preface the entire entire conversation with like, I
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  Speaker 1: don't know if I'm the best person to talk about
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  Speaker 1: this topic, okay, because I think I think people really
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  Speaker 1: love the idea of balance.
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  Speaker 4: Yeah, Like they really.
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  Speaker 1: Love the idea of Like I have a forty five
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  Speaker 1: minute morning routine and I start my day at nine
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  Speaker 1: forty six and I end my day at four thirty two,
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  Speaker 1: and then I cook myself a meal and I unwind
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  Speaker 1: with a glass of wine and I'm in bed with
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  Speaker 1: my eyemask on by ten, like whatever that is, Like,
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  Speaker 1: people love that idea in theory.
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  Speaker 4: But then life.
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  Speaker 1: Happens, right, and you get punched in the face, and
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  Speaker 1: somebody tells you need to be somewhere, and somebody's demanding
• 10:19
  Speaker 1: something from you, and you've got a family emergency that
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: you have to tend to, and your dog decides to
• 10:25
  Speaker 1: get sick and throw up on the carpet, and like
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: everything goes out the window really quickly and you're fucked. Yeah,
• 10:33
  Speaker 1: because life doesn't have time for your morning routine sometimes,
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  Speaker 1: like life does not have time for you to get
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  Speaker 1: on the peloton bike every single day, and like for
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: everybody that's out there right now that's trying to stack
• 10:46
  Speaker 1: habits and do their best day in the day out,
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  Speaker 1: like I applaud that so much because it's so important
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  Speaker 1: to building the foundation of some semblance of a routine.
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  Speaker 1: But you also can't be fragile enough that when one
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  Speaker 1: thing gets disrupted in your day that you're.
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  Speaker 4: Completely ruined for the week.
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  Speaker 1: And I think, like, that's where this idea of balance
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  Speaker 1: for me, I take like a very different approach to burnout,
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  Speaker 1: which is I go as hard and as fast as
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  Speaker 1: I can for as long as I can, and then
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  Speaker 1: I fall to the ground and I melt on a
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  Speaker 1: beach for seven days, and then I turn up again
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  Speaker 1: and I go in hard. Like That's why it's actually
• 11:24
  Speaker 1: funny that I said the COVID thing, like because when
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  Speaker 1: I got COVID over Christmas, I was like, oh wow,
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  Speaker 1: like like this sucks, this is terrible.
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  Speaker 4: I feel like a big ball of crud.
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  Speaker 1: But I'm going to relax for seven days and as
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  Speaker 1: soon as I possibly can, I am going to get
• 11:38
  Speaker 1: on a plane and I'm gonna travel, and I'm gonna
• 11:40
  Speaker 1: hug everybody, and I'm gonna kiss everyone and I'm gonna
• 11:43
  Speaker 1: have as many dinners and host as many lunches as
• 11:46
  Speaker 1: I possibly can until I can't again. And like whether that's,
• 11:51
  Speaker 1: you know, because of sickness or because I just like
• 11:54
  Speaker 1: physically have reached my limit, then that that'll be it.
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  Speaker 1: And then I'll I'll recognize that I I need to
• 12:00
  Speaker 1: take that break, and I'll completely step away, and I'll
• 12:03
  Speaker 1: set very important boundaries with people during that reset time.
• 12:08
  Speaker 2: Interesting, so I feel the need to call you out
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  Speaker 2: a little bit because I do know that you have
• 12:15
  Speaker 2: some sort well I mean, I don't even think it's
• 12:17
  Speaker 2: calling you out, it's me knowing you. I know that
• 12:20
  Speaker 2: you do have things within your routine that are very
• 12:22
  Speaker 2: strategic to help you perform in the way that you'd
• 12:25
  Speaker 2: like to perform. In fact, so although you may not
• 12:27
  Speaker 2: be getting on a peloton bike every day per se,
• 12:30
  Speaker 2: how many days a week would you say that you're
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  Speaker 2: active every day?
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  Speaker 3: Okay?
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  Speaker 1: I think like more like more importantly, I'm not as
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  Speaker 1: hard of a judge on myself as I think a
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  Speaker 1: lot of people are. I think a lot of people
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: are really mean to themselves. They're like, oh fuck, like
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: I can't believe I et Dominoes tonight, like I'm like,
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: you know, and they get like really upset, and of
• 12:51
  Speaker 1: course I have that feeling too, Like I sometimes Dominoes
• 12:54
  Speaker 1: will send me the four forty five texts of like,
• 12:57
  Speaker 1: you know, three dollars pizzas, and I'll decide to get too.
• 13:00
  Speaker 3: You're on the Dominoes test.
• 13:01
  Speaker 4: Listen, listen, listen, listen.
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: I'm on the Hurdle podcast. I like to admit things
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: that I'm not proud of. Sometimes we're being vulnerable here,
• 13:10
  Speaker 1: but after I finish the pizza and I feel like
• 13:13
  Speaker 1: a ball of crud, I won't wake up the next
• 13:15
  Speaker 1: morning and I won't say my life is ruined. I'll
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: say I've got to go run an extra mile this morning.
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  Speaker 1: And I think like that might be the balance that
• 13:23
  Speaker 1: a lot of people like need to actually implement in
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: their life instead of like kind of the prescribed kind
• 13:29
  Speaker 1: of you know, like accounting for every minute in terms
• 13:33
  Speaker 1: of like setting up your life.
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  Speaker 4: I think more broadly, you know.
• 13:38
  Speaker 1: For me, it's I don't have an alarm clock, so
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: I you know, a lot of I don't like wake
• 13:43
  Speaker 1: up at five o'clock in the morning.
• 13:44
  Speaker 4: I don't wake up at nine o'clock in the morning.
• 13:46
  Speaker 1: I wake up when my body's ready to wake up, which, like,
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: by the way, that might be like a majestic world
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: that a lot of people dream of. I've just kind
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: of gotten to that place. I take supplements in the morning.
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: I have two big glasses of water, you know, I
• 14:00
  Speaker 1: you know, suck down as much.
• 14:01
  Speaker 4: Water as I can. I have a piping hot cup
• 14:04
  Speaker 4: of coffee.
• 14:05
  Speaker 1: I try to get outside, you know. I try not
• 14:07
  Speaker 1: to like be on my phone too much. But that
• 14:11
  Speaker 1: doesn't happen, you know. Like that's where I have to
• 14:13
  Speaker 1: forgive myself and not be a hard judge on myself.
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: I'd love to read for forty five minutes in the morning,
• 14:17
  Speaker 1: but you know, for me, it's just like again, I
• 14:20
  Speaker 1: think that the burnout thing for everybody, and like I
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: have so I can't I can't imagine for people that
• 14:28
  Speaker 1: have spent two years on Zoom that of course we're
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: all burnt out. Like of course we're all burnt out.
• 14:36
  Speaker 1: The human interaction at in a lot of ways has
• 14:38
  Speaker 1: been gone.
• 14:39
  Speaker 2: You know.
• 14:40
  Speaker 1: I actually this is this is interesting. I think that
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: things like music festivals and experiences and things that cause
• 14:48
  Speaker 1: you to get out of your cubicle or out of
• 14:50
  Speaker 1: you know, your bedroom cubicle, I think is going to
• 14:52
  Speaker 1: be massive for people over the course of the next year,
• 14:56
  Speaker 1: year and a half. I think we're gonna have record
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: attendance at these things. I think people are gonna spend
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: more money on activities and being out in the world again,
• 15:04
  Speaker 1: and I think it's going to be I think it's
• 15:05
  Speaker 1: going to be amazing for people. And I think that's
• 15:07
  Speaker 1: kind of the the way that a lot of people
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: are going to try to combat burnout is through physical
• 15:13
  Speaker 1: experiences and being out in the world again. And I
• 15:16
  Speaker 1: think that's going to be really helpful and healthy for people. Comma,
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: when you return to your bedroom office, right when you
• 15:26
  Speaker 1: return to wherever you go, how are you doing things
• 15:31
  Speaker 1: every day that allow you to combat the monotony sometimes
• 15:38
  Speaker 1: of your own routine. And it's this thing I like
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  Speaker 1: to call breaking the matrix, which I think, you know,
• 15:44
  Speaker 1: for a lot of people that might have adopted, you know,
• 15:47
  Speaker 1: a specific kind of routine that they're trying to abide
• 15:49
  Speaker 1: by at the beginning of the year, or a certain
• 15:52
  Speaker 1: diet or a certain workout regimen, Like breaking the matrix
• 15:57
  Speaker 1: for me means destroy whatever perception of my reality that
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: I've created for myself so that I can I can
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: continue to be curious, grow, learn, and make life interesting. Emily,
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: you're a runner, Yeah, give me and tell me the
• 16:17
  Speaker 1: sport that you've been dying to try but haven't yet
• 16:20
  Speaker 1: tackled because you're a runner.
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  Speaker 3: Hm, great question.
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  Speaker 2: I would say an example, It's not one that I've
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: been dying to try, but I was hesitant to try
• 16:31
  Speaker 2: crossbit seven years ago because I was under the impression
• 16:36
  Speaker 2: at the time that you couldn't be a really fast
• 16:38
  Speaker 2: runner and also lift loads and loads of weights.
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  Speaker 4: That makes sense. Did you break the matrix?
• 16:44
  Speaker 3: I did break the matrix, And I think.
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: Like breaking the matrix like that's actually a little like
• 16:50
  Speaker 1: for me a little bit. Endurance sports running kind of
• 16:53
  Speaker 1: like high intensive interval training is kind of all the
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: same genre of soup. Right, Like I'm saying, like when
• 17:00
  Speaker 1: I say break the matrix, I'm not saying like have
• 17:03
  Speaker 1: an Italian wedding or pasta fijool. I'm saying like, like no, no,
• 17:07
  Speaker 1: like go uh split peek like even like even that
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: it's like kind of like this genre of soup. I'm saying,
• 17:13
  Speaker 1: like go have a bowl, like go have a like
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: a like a slushy like you know, like so like
• 17:19
  Speaker 1: what what is that? What would that be for you?
• 17:22
  Speaker 1: Like cricket or like something like you know, like I'm
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: literally breaking like shuffle board, Like holy shit, Like so.
• 17:29
  Speaker 3: For me, pickleball is trending. I know that you know that.
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: Big time pickle ball is on the come up. So
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: like that That's what I mean for people when I
• 17:36
  Speaker 1: say like break the matrix. And it's not about just
• 17:38
  Speaker 1: like oh, I'm going to do a single pottery class
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: and like like I'm like, no, like, whatever perception you
• 17:44
  Speaker 1: have of the person you are today, how.
• 17:46
  Speaker 4: Do you break that mold?
• 17:48
  Speaker 1: And not, by the way, like not completely destroy it,
• 17:52
  Speaker 1: like not not like you know, if you're an empathetic, kind, smart,
• 17:56
  Speaker 1: articulate person, I'm not telling you to become a drug addict, right,
• 17:59
  Speaker 1: I'm just saying that there's things that we attach so
• 18:02
  Speaker 1: much of our identity to. Whether it's what we eat
• 18:06
  Speaker 1: or how we how we dress, or the way we
• 18:08
  Speaker 1: talk or the movies we watch. How do we how
• 18:12
  Speaker 1: do we make sure that we break the matrix and
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: we try things that are outside of our comfort zone.
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: And I think that that's a way to stifle burnout
• 18:20
  Speaker 1: because the creative juice is the physical. You know, even
• 18:25
  Speaker 1: like movement that you're going to use will will stimulate
• 18:31
  Speaker 1: so much creativity and so much new energy in your life.
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: That may be the feeling that you have of being
• 18:37
  Speaker 1: burnt out at your nine to five job from being
• 18:39
  Speaker 1: on zoom for sixteen hours a day. This will give
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: you not only like a light at the end of
• 18:45
  Speaker 1: the tunnel, but like this will breathe fresh air into.
• 18:48
  Speaker 4: You that you didn't even know existed.
• 18:50
  Speaker 2: I also feel like you have a benefit in that
• 18:53
  Speaker 2: we talked about the diversity within your daily roster of
• 18:57
  Speaker 2: things that you need to get done.
• 18:58
  Speaker 3: That's a great point, and you have that opportunity.
• 19:01
  Speaker 2: It's kind of like going hand in hand with the
• 19:03
  Speaker 2: research that says that mixing up your exercise routine and
• 19:06
  Speaker 2: incorporating different activities into your movement can keep you more engaged,
• 19:11
  Speaker 2: more interested, and then as a result, like more active
• 19:14
  Speaker 2: in the long term.
• 19:15
  Speaker 3: So for you, it's like to stave off boredom.
• 19:18
  Speaker 2: You almost have like a really great opportunity because there's
• 19:20
  Speaker 2: so much stuff that's going on in your routine regularly.
• 19:23
  Speaker 2: For the person that does not have that opportunity, maybe
• 19:26
  Speaker 2: they're a nurse or I feel like, yes, there is
• 19:30
  Speaker 2: monotony in teaching, but you might be able to find
• 19:32
  Speaker 2: a little bit of an opportunity to diversify that in
• 19:35
  Speaker 2: the day to day, but just jobs that are a
• 19:37
  Speaker 2: little bit more mundane. The question then arises, what advice
• 19:41
  Speaker 2: can we offer to these individuals so that they can
• 19:44
  Speaker 2: help get past this burnout plateau?
• 19:46
  Speaker 1: Break the matrix? Okay, break the matrix? Like let's like, actually,
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: I really like the specific example. So if you're a
• 19:53
  Speaker 1: third grade teacher, you wake up every morning at a
• 19:55
  Speaker 1: certain time, You roll out of bed. Maybe you put
• 19:58
  Speaker 1: out your outfit for the next day the night before,
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: you make your cup of coffee at home and your
• 20:03
  Speaker 1: cuig or your an espresso. You hop in the car,
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: you turn it on, You drive the same damn route
• 20:09
  Speaker 1: every day. You get to the classroom. You greet the
• 20:11
  Speaker 1: students like you are in the matrix. How do I
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: break the matrix? Am I going to start drinking macha? Like?
• 20:18
  Speaker 1: Am I going to drive a different way to like?
• 20:20
  Speaker 1: It sounds so silly, but like, do I try driving
• 20:22
  Speaker 1: a different way to work? Do I listen to new
• 20:24
  Speaker 1: stuff on the radio? Then when is my free time?
• 20:27
  Speaker 1: If I'm a teacher, I have the luxury of potentially
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: being finished with the day at three pm. What am
• 20:33
  Speaker 1: I doing from three pm to the time that I
• 20:35
  Speaker 1: go to bed every night? That I can do something
• 20:38
  Speaker 1: vastly different than I've been doing for the last eighteen months,
• 20:41
  Speaker 1: That's great. That's how do I break the matrix? And again,
• 20:45
  Speaker 1: this is where like it's not about destroying the person
• 20:49
  Speaker 1: that you are today, but it's about it's about igniting
• 20:52
  Speaker 1: the fires inside of you that exist and levels of
• 20:56
  Speaker 1: curiosity that have drifted away because of the monotony of
• 20:59
  Speaker 1: every day because you're burnt out. So it's like, oh shit,
• 21:02
  Speaker 1: like I really did you know? We ough? This actually
• 21:06
  Speaker 1: like really gets hits me in a place because it's
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: something that I've been intimately aware of, even within myself.
• 21:14
  Speaker 4: I moved down to Miami Beach my way.
• 21:16
  Speaker 1: Of breaking the matrix, by the way, and so much
• 21:20
  Speaker 1: of my identity was pulled to New York City and
• 21:24
  Speaker 1: I moved down to Miami and I had to kind
• 21:26
  Speaker 1: of recreate the person I thought I was in some ways,
• 21:29
  Speaker 1: and it's been it's been profound for me personally. And
• 21:35
  Speaker 1: I know a lot of people can't get on the
• 21:36
  Speaker 1: luxury of moving to a new place. So I'm not
• 21:38
  Speaker 1: saying that that's a way to curb it or fix it.
• 21:41
  Speaker 1: But I've been telling myself for twenty I'm thirty one
• 21:45
  Speaker 1: years old. I've been telling myself for twenty years. I'm
• 21:47
  Speaker 1: going to learn Spanish. I have still yet to learn Spanish.
• 21:52
  Speaker 1: Two things that I've already said. I'm not a harsh
• 21:55
  Speaker 1: judge of myself, so I'm not beating myself up that
• 21:57
  Speaker 1: I haven't learned to speak Spanish yet. But I also
• 22:01
  Speaker 1: need to not play myself and I need to get
• 22:03
  Speaker 1: serious about learning to speak Spanish. For me, that would
• 22:06
  Speaker 1: be a way of breaking the matrix. Can you imagine,
• 22:09
  Speaker 1: Like I just got back from Puerto Rico. Could you
• 22:11
  Speaker 1: imagine if out of nowhere I was and all of
• 22:15
  Speaker 1: my you know, my friends know I don't speak Spanish.
• 22:17
  Speaker 1: If I just started fluently speaking Spanish well to the
• 22:21
  Speaker 1: waitress or you know, the waiter or you know, the
• 22:24
  Speaker 1: person that was helping us at the hotel, like that
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: would absolutely be a matrix breaking moment. I would destroy
• 22:32
  Speaker 1: the person other people thought I was in a given
• 22:36
  Speaker 1: moment if I could fluently speak Spanish. So I think,
• 22:39
  Speaker 1: like really taking a real look at the time you
• 22:43
  Speaker 1: spend the free time we have because we all have
• 22:46
  Speaker 1: free time like it exists.
• 22:47
  Speaker 4: You know, we can say we're busy.
• 22:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but we're you know, we can find and we
• 22:51
  Speaker 1: can make time for the things we actually care about.
• 22:54
  Speaker 1: I think if you actually analyze the time that you
• 22:56
  Speaker 1: have outside of the time that you're obligated, whether it's
• 23:00
  Speaker 1: work or family, whatever that is, and you say, how
• 23:03
  Speaker 1: am I spending this time? And like let's get super
• 23:05
  Speaker 1: into it. You know a lot of people listening right
• 23:09
  Speaker 1: now know like the back of their hand, every single
• 23:13
  Speaker 1: new Netflix, Hulu, HBO Max series. You know, like you've
• 23:18
  Speaker 1: seen this. You know, you've watched Sex in the City
• 23:21
  Speaker 1: three times, and you've saw the remake of the movie,
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: like you've just like you you've you've spent so much
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: time on consuming Yeah, so like take a look at
• 23:32
  Speaker 1: that time.
• 23:33
  Speaker 3: Yeah. No, I mean that's really great advice.
• 23:35
  Speaker 2: I think the concept of being honest with yourself about
• 23:39
  Speaker 2: how much quote unquote free time you actually have or
• 23:41
  Speaker 2: how much leisure time you have, And even if you
• 23:43
  Speaker 2: are a parent, like what could you be doing maybe
• 23:46
  Speaker 2: differently with your children that you aren't already doing and
• 23:49
  Speaker 2: how could you reframe the way that you guys spend
• 23:53
  Speaker 2: your afternoons together. There's a lot of opportunity in that.
• 23:55
  Speaker 2: And I also love the concept of perhaps even taking
• 24:00
  Speaker 2: a different route to work. I think that that is
• 24:04
  Speaker 2: an analogy for something bigger. Right, It's like it's not
• 24:08
  Speaker 2: actually just about like driving your car in a different
• 24:09
  Speaker 2: direction to get to from point A to point B,
• 24:12
  Speaker 2: but it's like this is literally an opportunity, Like you
• 24:15
  Speaker 2: have these twenty minutes, Like what can you do differently
• 24:17
  Speaker 2: with these twenty minutes? And that brings about another really
• 24:20
  Speaker 2: important point, which is the idea of snackable changes. So
• 24:25
  Speaker 2: you can do something quite small that can have a
• 24:28
  Speaker 2: profound difference. I'll say that again, you can do something
• 24:31
  Speaker 2: quite small that can have a profound difference not just
• 24:35
  Speaker 2: on your mood, but also just on your overall betterment. Right, So,
• 24:40
  Speaker 2: whether that is integrating a five to ten minute exercise
• 24:46
  Speaker 2: block into your day when you're someone who says, oh
• 24:48
  Speaker 2: I don't have time to work out, just five to
• 24:51
  Speaker 2: ten minutes, you have five to ten minutes, Or if
• 24:54
  Speaker 2: it's someone that's saying I don't have time to meditate
• 24:58
  Speaker 2: or I'm not good at medica, it's the small changes.
• 25:02
  Speaker 2: It's the separating fact from fiction. And I think when
• 25:04
  Speaker 2: you stop leaving your own bullshit or admit what is
• 25:07
  Speaker 2: actually going on in your life as it stands right now,
• 25:11
  Speaker 2: that is the first step to making positive change long term.
• 25:17
  Speaker 4: I love it.
• 25:18
  Speaker 1: You know, we're like sitting in this room holding these microphones. Yeah,
• 25:21
  Speaker 1: and like we're you know, playing these characters right now.
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: We're talking to each other on this podcast, and I'm
• 25:26
  Speaker 1: just like, if we could just like step outside of
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: ourselves for a quick second, you know, like when you're
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: feeling stagnant in that it's so easy for us to
• 25:35
  Speaker 1: sit here and be like, you know what, like do
• 25:37
  Speaker 1: twelve fucking push ups when you have a couple of minutes.
• 25:40
  Speaker 4: You know.
• 25:40
  Speaker 2: You know, Nick, I haven't marked an episode explicit in
• 25:43
  Speaker 2: a long time, but I'm actually excited.
• 25:45
  Speaker 4: I don't think i've is that the first curse?
• 25:46
  Speaker 2: I would say that, no, it's not the first curse,
• 25:48
  Speaker 2: but it's been a minute and I'm actually like it
• 25:50
  Speaker 2: kind of warms my heart because your f bombs come
• 25:53
  Speaker 2: loaded with passion.
• 25:55
  Speaker 4: I didn't even catch the first one.
• 25:56
  Speaker 1: It's easy for us to say here like oh yeah,
• 25:59
  Speaker 1: like when I have five and it's like, let me
• 26:00
  Speaker 1: do a couple of push ups, like let me let
• 26:02
  Speaker 1: me do some jumping jacks. It's hard when we're in
• 26:05
  Speaker 1: the day to day of like the same routine in
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: our kitchen to be like let me, let me dance
• 26:12
  Speaker 1: with my partner.
• 26:15
  Speaker 4: Like it's it's insanely hard.
• 26:18
  Speaker 1: And I and I have again, like I have a
• 26:21
  Speaker 1: lot of empathy and understanding why that's so difficult. Like
• 26:24
  Speaker 1: when you pick up the kids every day from school
• 26:27
  Speaker 1: and you come home and you you know, you pick
• 26:30
  Speaker 1: up food or you make dinner, you know, you go
• 26:32
  Speaker 1: through the routine of life and you're you're getting burnt out.
• 26:36
  Speaker 1: I understand why it's hard to say, like I'm going
• 26:39
  Speaker 1: to dance with my partner. That's where we need to
• 26:42
  Speaker 1: like step outside of the characters we're playing, like hold
• 26:47
  Speaker 1: a mirror up to ourselves, and like, if we're not
• 26:50
  Speaker 1: happy with the person that we are, we have to
• 26:52
  Speaker 1: change it. And then there's going to be people in
• 26:55
  Speaker 1: that process that aren't going to accept the version of
• 26:59
  Speaker 1: you that you're trying to create. And that's going to
• 27:02
  Speaker 1: be okay because people don't like change, and that's totally acceptable.
• 27:07
  Speaker 1: But you have to realize you need to do things
• 27:09
  Speaker 1: that are going to make you happy, And I think
• 27:11
  Speaker 1: burnout comes when you don't recognize that the monotony of
• 27:15
  Speaker 1: everyday life is slowly killing you on the inside. And
• 27:19
  Speaker 1: by recognizing that that's what's happening, I think you can
• 27:22
  Speaker 1: combat burnout much more effectively. And by the way, we
• 27:26
  Speaker 1: talked about a very physical version of my burnout, not
• 27:29
  Speaker 1: like necessarily a mental emotional but I think for a
• 27:32
  Speaker 1: lot of people it's actually the mental and emotional burnout
• 27:34
  Speaker 1: that they go through, not so much the physical.
• 27:42
  Speaker 2: Taking a break from today's episode to give some love
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• 29:23
  Speaker 2: a little bit about you recognizing when you're at that
• 29:27
  Speaker 2: mental and emotional tipping point.
• 29:30
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 29:30
  Speaker 1: I want to say, actually one more thing with kids,
• 29:33
  Speaker 1: and I don't have kids, so I could I can't
• 29:35
  Speaker 1: really really speak on this, but I aspire to someday
• 29:40
  Speaker 1: be a father and have children, and I actually look
• 29:43
  Speaker 1: at the kids as a bit of a really cool
• 29:45
  Speaker 1: excuse to learn new things. So I'm like I haven't learned.
• 29:49
  Speaker 1: I'm a terrible but great dancer, meaning like unbridled confidence
• 29:54
  Speaker 1: when I get on a dance floor, which makes it
• 29:55
  Speaker 1: fun and entertaining, but I you know, I have two
• 29:58
  Speaker 1: left feet. I love look at like the having kids
• 30:02
  Speaker 1: moment is like like, that's the moment I'm going to
• 30:04
  Speaker 1: learn how to salsa, or that's the moment I'm going
• 30:06
  Speaker 1: to learn how to ballroom dance, Like I am going
• 30:08
  Speaker 1: to go to classes with my children, and you know,
• 30:12
  Speaker 1: maybe that's the time I do learn how to scuba dive.
• 30:14
  Speaker 1: And again, like I don't have children, I can't speak
• 30:17
  Speaker 1: on this, but like I actually look at that as
• 30:19
  Speaker 1: like a fun time to reinvigorate some of the curiosity
• 30:24
  Speaker 1: that I had that maybe got confined because of like
• 30:28
  Speaker 1: the responsibilities of adulthood when we're all kind of running
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: really hard and trying to build something and you know,
• 30:35
  Speaker 1: create a foundation for our future selves. I actually look
• 30:38
  Speaker 1: at the moment when children do enter the picture as
• 30:41
  Speaker 1: like a moment to go back and explore some of
• 30:44
  Speaker 1: that creativity that I may be left on the table.
• 30:47
  Speaker 1: Mental and emotional burnout. Quick transition. So this one's This
• 30:51
  Speaker 1: one's difficult because I feel like the mental the mental
• 30:57
  Speaker 1: burnout you can often attribute for me at least to
• 31:02
  Speaker 1: maybe like the intensity of tasks or things that you're
• 31:06
  Speaker 1: you're working on, the volume, the complexity of them. The
• 31:11
  Speaker 1: emotional stuff for me, and I'm just going to speak
• 31:14
  Speaker 1: to my experiences comes when things are outside of my control.
• 31:21
  Speaker 4: You know, it's like.
• 31:22
  Speaker 1: The there's some you know, somebody sick in the family,
• 31:27
  Speaker 1: or my partner and I aren't on the same page,
• 31:32
  Speaker 1: you know, Like I think that's when the emotional toll
• 31:35
  Speaker 1: kicks in, and you know, I think in those moments
• 31:39
  Speaker 1: it's it's just like you have to have unwavering kindness
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: again for yourself. We're also turned up in this idea
• 31:47
  Speaker 1: of like thirty sixty ninety days and we just completely
• 31:53
  Speaker 1: outweigh what we can accomplish in thirty sixty or ninety days.
• 31:58
  Speaker 1: But I'm really looking at it is like what's happening
• 32:01
  Speaker 1: in three, six and nine years. And when you start
• 32:04
  Speaker 1: to think about it like that, you recognize that some
• 32:07
  Speaker 1: of the things that emotionally just might be like gutting
• 32:11
  Speaker 1: you on the inside, we'll feel a lot better or
• 32:14
  Speaker 1: you'll have resolved in three years, six years or nine years.
• 32:18
  Speaker 1: So I think that's one of the ways. It's just
• 32:20
  Speaker 1: a bit of a perspective shift on just like time
• 32:23
  Speaker 1: and the passing of it on the emotional side, and
• 32:26
  Speaker 1: then I think on the mental side, Yeah, sleep is profound.
• 32:31
  Speaker 2: Yeah, sleep is just Is that not like one of
• 32:33
  Speaker 2: the biggest lessons you learn when you get into your thirties?
• 32:37
  Speaker 4: Crazy now, Like I almost like I'm just like.
• 32:40
  Speaker 2: Wow, Like I do feel very fortunate that I too
• 32:44
  Speaker 2: can say that I very rarely set alarms. I'm naturally
• 32:47
  Speaker 2: like an early riser, Like, as long as I am
• 32:49
  Speaker 2: feeling great, I'm pretty much without a doubt up by
• 32:53
  Speaker 2: like six fifteen.
• 32:54
  Speaker 3: Six thirty at the latest.
• 32:56
  Speaker 2: But I do recognize that not everybody has that luxury
• 33:00
  Speaker 2: sleep amazing, but you can also prioritize it on the
• 33:02
  Speaker 2: back end. Right, what was the phrase you used with
• 33:05
  Speaker 2: me when I told you what time I needed to
• 33:07
  Speaker 2: be out of my apartment today?
• 33:07
  Speaker 3: I love a backboard.
• 33:09
  Speaker 4: Yeah, backboards are great, So.
• 33:10
  Speaker 3: I'll backboard my day. I'll backboard my sleep.
• 33:13
  Speaker 2: Like I know that I'm going to get up at
• 33:14
  Speaker 2: six fifteen in the morning, so that means I know
• 33:17
  Speaker 2: I want to be sleeping I mean my goldilocks evening,
• 33:20
  Speaker 2: I am in my bed at nine oh five.
• 33:23
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it's nice.
• 33:23
  Speaker 3: It's nice.
• 33:24
  Speaker 4: That's nice.
• 33:25
  Speaker 3: It's super nice.
• 33:26
  Speaker 1: I mean and again like it's nice, like life sometimes
• 33:31
  Speaker 1: punches you in the face and you might not be
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: able to do that.
• 33:34
  Speaker 3: Right. We're bringing this full circle right now.
• 33:36
  Speaker 2: So then the thing that happens in that moment, in
• 33:38
  Speaker 2: the days where I'm not in my bed at nine
• 33:40
  Speaker 2: oh five, say, I did entertain the fact that I
• 33:43
  Speaker 2: could have the opportunity to have some semblance of a
• 33:45
  Speaker 2: social life. I'm out later, I've had a couple of
• 33:47
  Speaker 2: glasses of wine. I love what you said earlier about
• 33:51
  Speaker 2: waking up the next day and not being mad at yourself,
• 33:54
  Speaker 2: just saying this is how it is now.
• 33:56
  Speaker 3: This is what balance now looks for me today.
• 33:59
  Speaker 2: This is what I'm going to do to move forward
• 34:01
  Speaker 2: with this instead of being like, oh, I shouldn't have
• 34:04
  Speaker 2: done that, because that doesn't serve you.
• 34:07
  Speaker 3: It doesn't serve you at all.
• 34:08
  Speaker 1: I have to give kudos to my partner erin. She
• 34:13
  Speaker 1: does so much work in and outer all the time,
• 34:18
  Speaker 1: and I learned so much from her. I recognized early
• 34:21
  Speaker 1: in our relationship that I was wired a bit different
• 34:23
  Speaker 1: because just like life would happen and I would go
• 34:26
  Speaker 1: to sleep, and I would wake up the next day
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: and it would be like it was my birthday. Every
• 34:31
  Speaker 1: single day I spring out of bed, I'm super fucking happy,
• 34:35
  Speaker 1: go lucky, and everything's good in the world, even if
• 34:39
  Speaker 1: the night before things were bad. And I realized that
• 34:43
  Speaker 1: everybody's not wired that way. And through the course of
• 34:46
  Speaker 1: Aaron's kind of inner and outer works, she often like
• 34:50
  Speaker 1: just gives me these like nuggets that help me articulate
• 34:55
  Speaker 1: it for other people outside of just my you know,
• 34:58
  Speaker 1: like predisposed, you know, like God given approach and perspective.
• 35:03
  Speaker 4: And she said recently, she said that.
• 35:08
  Speaker 1: The the reality of our situation, you know, sometimes we'd
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: wish for things to be different. Oh I wish I
• 35:15
  Speaker 1: didn't eat that pizza last night. Oh I wish I
• 35:18
  Speaker 1: didn't have that tequila rock set three o'clock in the morning.
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: Oh I wish that this meeting was happening thirty minutes later.
• 35:25
  Speaker 1: But like it's fucking not. It's our reality that we
• 35:29
  Speaker 1: ate the pizza or had the tequila or meetings happening
• 35:32
  Speaker 1: in twelve minutes from now, and we're just getting out
• 35:34
  Speaker 1: of bed sometimes and.
• 35:36
  Speaker 4: Like that's the reality of our situation.
• 35:38
  Speaker 1: You know. She by the way, like Aaron would just
• 35:40
  Speaker 1: beat me up right now if I explain it this way,
• 35:43
  Speaker 1: because she has a much more delicate and thoughtful approach
• 35:45
  Speaker 1: how she articulates the stuff. But this is now I've
• 35:47
  Speaker 1: extracted her message from this, like stop wishing for things
• 35:51
  Speaker 1: to be different and recognize that your reality is your
• 35:54
  Speaker 1: reality in that moment, and that's it's up to you
• 35:57
  Speaker 1: in terms of like how you want to react and respond,
• 36:00
  Speaker 1: because I know because I have too, have done it,
• 36:03
  Speaker 1: that we can spiral totally. We can spiral into this
• 36:08
  Speaker 1: like because I didn't wake up on time and I
• 36:10
  Speaker 1: didn't get this in me that this is going to
• 36:12
  Speaker 1: go wrong, and this cab passed me by on the
• 36:15
  Speaker 1: street and now it's rating.
• 36:16
  Speaker 3: Yeah, these things don't.
• 36:19
  Speaker 2: All of it, no, And I hear that, and I
• 36:22
  Speaker 2: when I feel overwhelmed and that I'm approaching burnout, this
• 36:28
  Speaker 2: thought process is exactly where I lean in. I think
• 36:32
  Speaker 2: to myself, what is within my power to do right
• 36:35
  Speaker 2: now to help combat exactly how I am feeling. And
• 36:40
  Speaker 2: some days that means looking at the to do list
• 36:43
  Speaker 2: you made four hours earlier and saying, Nope, this isn't
• 36:48
  Speaker 2: where I'm at today. What is actually within my power?
• 36:51
  Speaker 2: What can I do right now to break the matrix?
• 36:54
  Speaker 2: And the answer often most always initiates by removing myself.
• 37:00
  Speaker 3: Temporarily from that environment.
• 37:02
  Speaker 2: So you and I right now sitting in the AG studio,
• 37:06
  Speaker 2: I would get up, I would at least go downstairs and.
• 37:10
  Speaker 3: Take one lap around the block.
• 37:11
  Speaker 4: Nice.
• 37:12
  Speaker 2: I'm not saying that it has to be a thirty
• 37:15
  Speaker 2: sixty ninety two hour commitment, but just that brief shift
• 37:20
  Speaker 2: of environment can make a world of difference and help
• 37:23
  Speaker 2: me shift my perspective that when I come back in here,
• 37:26
  Speaker 2: I'm more ready and able to meet myself with where
• 37:29
  Speaker 2: I'm at. Because I don't shift that environment, then I
• 37:32
  Speaker 2: have a hard time just flipping the switch, finding the
• 37:35
  Speaker 2: gratitude and moving forward. It's like the environment shift really
• 37:38
  Speaker 2: really plays a key part for me.
• 37:40
  Speaker 1: Here's another one I want to add on to that,
• 37:43
  Speaker 1: because I think that's really great when we're often in
• 37:46
  Speaker 1: a downward spiral like that, is this. I think this
• 37:49
  Speaker 1: is actually a really nice way to like help this
• 37:51
  Speaker 1: kind of come full circle as well. You're feeling crummy,
• 37:54
  Speaker 1: you're burnt out, things, aren't going your way and now
• 37:58
  Speaker 1: all of a sudden.
• 37:58
  Speaker 4: Like how you get out of it?
• 38:00
  Speaker 1: You know, like how do you combat that feeling? And
• 38:03
  Speaker 1: I think we often think, like what are the things
• 38:05
  Speaker 1: that we can do for ourselves? Oh, I'm gonna go
• 38:08
  Speaker 1: melt on a beach for seven days, or I'll go
• 38:09
  Speaker 1: take a walk around my apartment, or you know, I'll
• 38:12
  Speaker 1: treat myself to a dinner, I'll throw out my to
• 38:14
  Speaker 1: do list. One of the things that's like really hit
• 38:18
  Speaker 1: me as of late is doing something nice for someone else.
• 38:22
  Speaker 3: I love that.
• 38:24
  Speaker 1: It's just like because it fills up whatever reservoir you
• 38:29
  Speaker 1: have that was depleted so much faster when you do
• 38:33
  Speaker 1: something nice for somebody else who might be in a
• 38:36
  Speaker 1: tough spot or struggling. And like again, it can be
• 38:39
  Speaker 1: like as simple as like being pleasant to your uber
• 38:42
  Speaker 1: driver or or just you know, giving that person a
• 38:48
  Speaker 1: call that you might know who's going through a difficult
• 38:51
  Speaker 1: time and listening without very important, without expressing your woes
• 38:58
  Speaker 1: about your life.
• 39:00
  Speaker 3: Or offering advice, correct, just listening.
• 39:03
  Speaker 4: Correct.
• 39:04
  Speaker 3: We love that.
• 39:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah, And I think, like, you know, if you're feeling
• 39:09
  Speaker 1: burnt out and stressed and tired, all of a sudden,
• 39:13
  Speaker 1: you're the if you can find it in yourself, because
• 39:16
  Speaker 1: I know it's hard, and I know again like this
• 39:18
  Speaker 1: is advice from a guy sitting in a chair who's
• 39:20
  Speaker 1: like not currently in that mood. So I have a
• 39:23
  Speaker 1: lot of empathy and respect for people that are currently
• 39:25
  Speaker 1: burnt out and tired and don't have the emotional capacity
• 39:29
  Speaker 1: to give to somebody else. But if you can find
• 39:30
  Speaker 1: it in yourself to call somebody, be there for somebody,
• 39:35
  Speaker 1: even you know, like tip a little bit extra sometimes
• 39:38
  Speaker 1: like that, you know, like go get a haircut for you,
• 39:41
  Speaker 1: but be super chatty and you know, happy, and try
• 39:44
  Speaker 1: try to turn it around for the other person who's engaging,
• 39:47
  Speaker 1: Like if you can find it yourself. For me personally,
• 39:50
  Speaker 1: I've found that that fills my cup up a lot
• 39:52
  Speaker 1: faster than me doing something for myself.
• 39:54
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I love that.
• 39:55
  Speaker 2: I've also been a sucker for I don't know if
• 39:58
  Speaker 2: you've heard of this app, but this is not sponsored
• 40:01
  Speaker 2: at all.
• 40:01
  Speaker 3: It's called Goodie.
• 40:02
  Speaker 1: Might need to be I know Goodie the founders from Miami,
• 40:06
  Speaker 1: please tell, please tell the audience what it is.
• 40:09
  Speaker 2: Goodie is a gifting app. It has a lot of
• 40:12
  Speaker 2: like super trendy stuff on there. You can send a
• 40:15
  Speaker 2: gift via text message to anyone and you don't need
• 40:18
  Speaker 2: to know their home address or even their email. So
• 40:21
  Speaker 2: it makes it super accessible to just send someone a
• 40:24
  Speaker 2: little something. And I have been using goodie like as
• 40:27
  Speaker 2: one of my go to ways to send someone something small, surprising, delight,
• 40:32
  Speaker 2: just to be like, I'm thinking about you. They can
• 40:35
  Speaker 2: switch it out to what's that mean?
• 40:37
  Speaker 4: Meaning like send you?
• 40:39
  Speaker 1: You send somebody a bag and it cost sixty seven dollars.
• 40:43
  Speaker 1: You have the option to swap it out for something
• 40:45
  Speaker 1: else that's in that price range, and it wouldn't charge
• 40:49
  Speaker 1: you any more for it.
• 40:52
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it's a cool one.
• 40:53
  Speaker 1: And I you know, I think by the way technology
• 40:57
  Speaker 1: we all demonize it, like, I think, like that's a
• 40:59
  Speaker 1: really great exact ample of a way we can integrate
• 41:03
  Speaker 1: technology to actually like bring a little bit of joy
• 41:06
  Speaker 1: efficiency to our lives without further depleting our reservoir.
• 41:10
  Speaker 3: We love it. We love it. These are so many
• 41:12
  Speaker 3: good tips.
• 41:12
  Speaker 2: Before I let you go cool, before I put away
• 41:16
  Speaker 2: my microphones, pack them in the bag and get going.
• 41:19
  Speaker 2: I do want to talk to you about that to
• 41:22
  Speaker 2: do list that we talked about at the top of
• 41:24
  Speaker 2: this Specifically, if you have any strategies or thoughts on
• 41:29
  Speaker 2: perhaps how to tackle.
• 41:31
  Speaker 3: It in a way that makes you feel confident.
• 41:33
  Speaker 2: Do you have any best practices that you implement regularly
• 41:37
  Speaker 2: to make that to do lists more manageable?
• 41:39
  Speaker 4: It's a great question.
• 41:40
  Speaker 1: I'm working on it, and I have a lot of
• 41:42
  Speaker 1: people that I'm like hiring to help work on it
• 41:46
  Speaker 1: as well. You know, I have an app called Clear
• 41:51
  Speaker 1: that I use that's like a bit of like a
• 41:54
  Speaker 1: two do list tracker.
• 41:56
  Speaker 3: Okay, called Clear? Is it called Clear? Let's find out?
• 41:59
  Speaker 1: Is called Yeah, it's called Clear. So I use that
• 42:03
  Speaker 1: as a bit of like a to do list maker.
• 42:05
  Speaker 1: And then I so, actually, this is fun. The way
• 42:07
  Speaker 1: my brain works, like probably most people, is through list making.
• 42:12
  Speaker 1: And I like to categorize my to do lists in
• 42:14
  Speaker 1: different things, and I like to categorize people in different ways.
• 42:17
  Speaker 1: And because the ability to recall things, especially when we're
• 42:21
  Speaker 1: inundated with information and we're constantly consumed by all the
• 42:25
  Speaker 1: things we're doing, it's really difficult. It's really difficult to say,
• 42:28
  Speaker 1: like what type of wine does Emily like to drink?
• 42:31
  Speaker 1: Or like, ooh, we were just together and that person
• 42:34
  Speaker 1: got a new dog, What the hell is their dog's name,
• 42:37
  Speaker 1: Like it's really hard to do that, And I actually
• 42:38
  Speaker 1: want to use technology in a way that helps me
• 42:41
  Speaker 1: better track and communicate those things so that I can
• 42:45
  Speaker 1: be more present and more effectible. I can go deeper
• 42:49
  Speaker 1: with people, like I want to use technology in that way.
• 42:51
  Speaker 1: In terms of like tackling to do lists, I think
• 42:54
  Speaker 1: that there's going to be things on your list day
• 42:57
  Speaker 1: to day that are like really pressing and hot, and
• 43:00
  Speaker 1: there are going to be things on your list that
• 43:02
  Speaker 1: you can back burner and they can happen.
• 43:03
  Speaker 4: Two three days, two three weeks later.
• 43:06
  Speaker 1: I think, for me, the most important thing about my
• 43:12
  Speaker 1: to do list in any capacity, and I'm just going
• 43:14
  Speaker 1: to it's going to be very simple, is that I'm
• 43:17
  Speaker 1: not too harsh of a judge when the things on
• 43:20
  Speaker 1: my to do list don't get done because my intent
• 43:24
  Speaker 1: was always in the right place. I tried really hard
• 43:29
  Speaker 1: today to squeeze this in. If I couldn't have made
• 43:33
  Speaker 1: it today, I feel like you would have known that
• 43:37
  Speaker 1: I wanted to be here, And I think like that's
• 43:39
  Speaker 1: important for me is that I use my technology to
• 43:44
  Speaker 1: communicate to people where I am mentally, emotionally, physically, and
• 43:50
  Speaker 1: my to do list is not the judge and jury
• 43:55
  Speaker 1: of the effectiveness of my day. I am the judge
• 43:58
  Speaker 1: and jury of the effectiveness.
• 43:59
  Speaker 2: Of my day. This is now a therapy session. You
• 44:02
  Speaker 2: can re listen to it wherever you get your podcasts,
• 44:05
  Speaker 2: whenever you would like. That's probably took a lot of
• 44:08
  Speaker 2: personal work to get to that point.
• 44:11
  Speaker 1: It took a lot of like, oh fuck, I didn't
• 44:13
  Speaker 1: finish right to do list, you know. Like what's funny
• 44:16
  Speaker 1: about turning thirty is like, oh shit, we know some shit.
• 44:19
  Speaker 4: Now we've been through a little bit of life.
• 44:21
  Speaker 1: Like it's starting to get interesting because there's a little
• 44:24
  Speaker 1: bit of pattern recognition, Like for anybody who's twenty four,
• 44:28
  Speaker 1: actually younger twenty one through twenty seven, Like you're.
• 44:32
  Speaker 4: Just starting to figure it the fuck out, you know.
• 44:35
  Speaker 1: So like by the time you get thirty, you start
• 44:37
  Speaker 1: to really understand some shit. And I can tell you
• 44:39
  Speaker 1: one thing, like life goes on.
• 44:41
  Speaker 2: Yeah, life goes on if you don't finish everything on
• 44:44
  Speaker 2: your to do list. I think that is probably one
• 44:46
  Speaker 2: of the biggest takeaways from the past two years for me,
• 44:49
  Speaker 2: is like having that grace with myself knowing that what's
• 44:52
  Speaker 2: really important I will prioritize and it will all get
• 44:56
  Speaker 2: done with time, And I mean on the note of
• 44:59
  Speaker 2: overall and now, the same rings true, right is having
• 45:02
  Speaker 2: that grace with yourself and knowing that when you are
• 45:06
  Speaker 2: really going through the thick of it, you've got to
• 45:08
  Speaker 2: break the matrix.
• 45:09
  Speaker 4: Break the matrix everyone.
• 45:11
  Speaker 2: Nick Diodado, so grateful for you. Thank you for making
• 45:14
  Speaker 2: the time on your to do list to come through here.
• 45:16
  Speaker 4: I'm honored.
• 45:17
  Speaker 3: Thank you for having it and be here with me.
• 45:19
  Speaker 3: How do the hurdlers follow along with your fun life?
• 45:22
  Speaker 3: How do they keep up with you? Give me all
• 45:24
  Speaker 3: the details, so some.
• 45:25
  Speaker 1: Fun things, And I'm actually really excited this. I know
• 45:28
  Speaker 1: you have a predominantly female audience. I do, and we're
• 45:32
  Speaker 1: looking to hire a lot of people. And I think
• 45:38
  Speaker 1: that there's what I do predominantly like in a relationship capacity,
• 45:45
  Speaker 1: Like I need a real female counterpart, Like I need
• 45:49
  Speaker 1: somebody who loves talking to people, who loves like going
• 45:54
  Speaker 1: deep with people, who loves understanding, who's incredibly emotionally intelligent
• 45:59
  Speaker 1: and he understands what makes people tick. And I'm like
• 46:02
  Speaker 1: really looking for that person to help me on all
• 46:04
  Speaker 1: things gary and relationships. And I just know your audience
• 46:08
  Speaker 1: is emotionally intelligent, thoughtful, driven, motivated, ambitious, And I'm just
• 46:13
  Speaker 1: like really looking for that person too, who can like
• 46:16
  Speaker 1: join me and really help build deep, meaningful relationships that
• 46:22
  Speaker 1: we can leverage where I'm in. I'm in the people business,
• 46:25
  Speaker 1: and nothing would bring me more joy than finding a hurdler.
• 46:28
  Speaker 4: To join my team.
• 46:29
  Speaker 3: Oh, he's already speaking to the people. I feel like
• 46:33
  Speaker 3: she's listening.
• 46:34
  Speaker 4: I hope so at Nick Dio on Instagram and ic
• 46:38
  Speaker 4: k D.
• 46:39
  Speaker 2: I all right, I'm over at Emily a Body at
• 46:43
  Speaker 2: Hurdle Podcast. Another hurdle conquered. Catch you guys next time.