Latest / Lose the Plot with Carla and Emily / Five Brothers by Penelope Douglas - The MOST Scandalous Why Choose Smut?

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Five Brothers by Penelope Douglas - The MOST Scandalous Why Choose Smut? · Lose the Plot with Carla and Emily

• 0:00
  Hi friends, you're listening to Lose the Plot with Carla and
• 0:03
  Emily. In this episode we're reading
• 0:05
  Five Brothers by Penelope Douglas.
• 0:08
  We are talking about the entire book, so warning there will be
• 0:11
  spoilers. I'm Carla and life didn't make
• 0:28
  him a monster. People like her did.
• 0:32
  I just sort of went really well with.
• 0:34
  Who's it? Was like, it goes really well
• 0:36
  with the theme of just blaming women for everything.
• 0:38
  Oh. Fair.
• 0:40
  I'm Emily. No one knows I'm Swamp.
• 0:45
  Shrek his love, Shrek his life. Honestly.
• 0:49
  Though I was like, are we back with where the Crawdads sing or
• 0:52
  oh the marsh, sorry, not swamp. Swamp Princess.
• 0:57
  Before we get too tangled up in the chaos that is Five Brothers,
• 1:01
  we have a tiny favour to ask. If you've enjoyed our past
• 1:04
  episodes and want more deliciously twisted stories like
• 1:08
  this one, take a second now to tap that five star review on
• 1:11
  your podcast app. Got friends who like their
• 1:14
  romance messy, forbidden and a little dangerous?
• 1:18
  Send them our link Trigger warnings from us.
• 1:24
  You're a reliable source of trigger warnings from us.
• 1:27
  Girl from just a little couple of girly pops.
• 1:33
  Did you have any particular ones?
• 1:35
  Men. Oh my.
• 1:37
  God, why? Why is it always men?
• 1:40
  I should have known. Dubious slash just no consent
• 1:45
  because why not? Page 1 mentions of.
• 1:51
  Men. Oh yes, mental health, including
• 1:55
  suicide mentioned. Violence.
• 1:58
  Torture like capturing people as well and holding people hostage.
• 2:02
  Depression. Intense suicidal thoughts?
• 2:04
  Yes. Internal thoughts, yes.
• 2:06
  I said. Extreme misogyny.
• 2:08
  Extreme misogyny. Like it's like.
• 2:11
  On this. Like.
• 2:12
  Like an XXL misogyny, yeah. Yeah.
• 2:19
  Like if I was to order that as a Sunday, yeah, I wouldn't be able
• 2:23
  to finish it. There's fudge.
• 2:28
  Incestuous sexual relationships always implied as well.
• 2:32
  Yeah, because there was. Nah, Nah.
• 2:36
  There's nothing Penelope Douglas loves.
• 2:38
  More, I swear. She's.
• 2:40
  Like how far can I push the incest before someone gets
• 2:45
  annoyed? She like dables it on her
• 2:48
  strings. She's like what?
• 2:49
  It's not enough. Like who's going to stop her?
• 2:54
  At this. Point Someone needs to call her
• 2:57
  mum because I've had enough. Girl she.
• 3:00
  Dedicated the book not. Only her mum, but her grandma
• 3:04
  and her step mum. I was like go of all the books
• 3:07
  to dedicate to your mum, grandma and step mum, this was not the
• 3:12
  one. Babe, take it back.
• 3:15
  Honestly, Peter, take it back. Take it back.
• 3:17
  Take it all the way back. You never know.
• 3:21
  Whose mum is reading this with pride?
• 3:24
  Sorry. Penelope.
• 3:29
  Stop deflated. Balloon.
• 3:33
  Hey don't give away my Twitter name.
• 3:36
  Like what OK the most? Ultimate pick me.
• 3:40
  Mentality to the point of being triggering.
• 3:42
  Well, so me just ignoring you. No, no, Loki prostitution, high
• 3:49
  key high key prostitution. Oh.
• 3:52
  But it was. Almost like times 2 prostitution
• 3:55
  make em and then low key Christian selling herself.
• 4:00
  But it was almost leaning on the edge of non consensual sex work.
• 4:05
  Mm hmm. And I'm like.
• 4:06
  But anyway, we'll get into that. Yeah, we've got.
• 4:08
  Time. So apart from that there's
• 4:09
  probably loads of other things. Age gap.
• 4:12
  If you're uncomfortable with that, get the fuck out of this.
• 4:14
  Honestly, just assume the worst things because.
• 4:18
  Penelope Douglas Badly written female characters just across
• 4:22
  the board. This one doesn't pass the back
• 4:24
  door test, in case anyone was wondering.
• 4:30
  That's all you need to know. OK, let's get into it.
• 4:33
  Otherwise, we're going to be circling the drain I.
• 4:35
  Can. Really feel it with this one.
• 4:38
  I'm like, we're going to go off, we're just going to go off
• 4:41
  track. I can tell we're tobogganing
• 4:43
  into the unknown. Chapter 1 alone.
• 4:47
  OK, let's start at chapter 1. I page one, page 2, we're past
• 4:52
  page one, we're past page two. OK.
• 4:54
  And I was like. What is happening?
• 4:58
  I feel like I read an entire book in chapter 1 alone.
• 5:03
  Yeah. And then it just went downhill
• 5:05
  from there. Well, it was like, we're in this
• 5:07
  big role-playing thing just. Unaware, unaware, unaware.
• 5:11
  We're throwing in here underwear.
• 5:13
  We're. Thrust.
• 5:14
  We're thrusted quite. Literally.
• 5:18
  We're thrusted into kidnapping. Yeah, knife play.
• 5:21
  Right. Yeah.
• 5:24
  Straight away I was like oh who? How am I supposed?
• 5:27
  OK, so from what I know. So.
• 5:31
  From what I knew from this book, I knew she's gonna pick one
• 5:34
  brother because she slept with one and she didn't know who it
• 5:36
  was. Right and.
• 5:37
  When we had this bit, I was like, don't let it be this one.
• 5:43
  You're like, like. So you're telling me you're
• 5:46
  getting raped and then you're gonna pick this one?
• 5:48
  I'm so. Confused.
• 5:49
  You know what concept? Solid foundation.
• 5:52
  She really? Scared me there I.
• 5:55
  Was like. Fuck.
• 5:56
  So, the teaser of this book. And if you don't know anything
• 5:59
  about this book, strap in, because look, we take no
• 6:03
  prisoners here. We're just going all the way
• 6:04
  down to hell. So the concept is she bangs one
• 6:08
  of five biological brothers. Yes.
• 6:11
  And the entire rest of the book is her playing pussy detective.
• 6:16
  To. Figure out which brother it was.
• 6:19
  Even though it's clearly who it is.
• 6:24
  Like, oh, she tried to Chuck a couple curveballs.
• 6:27
  Honestly. Valid.
• 6:28
  But look, we'll get to that bit when we get to it.
• 6:30
  Turns out she's already been banging. 1.
• 6:33
  She's been banging 1. So she's already ahead of the
• 6:35
  game. Hmm.
• 6:37
  Hmm. She has been banging Trace for
• 6:40
  about a year. Trace Cyrus.
• 6:45
  OK. No and.
• 6:48
  You good sis, Chris. Jen.
• 6:50
  But you remember I. Called her Chris Jenner last
• 6:53
  time so. Your girl, Chris.
• 6:55
  Jen is now barely legal, like they've graduated from my She.
• 7:00
  Is still just a child, but she's. 18 so she can consent,
• 7:05
  but in America she's not of age for.
• 7:09
  She can't drink stuff. She's not a.
• 7:10
  Legal adult. She's not a legal adult, but
• 7:15
  she's legal enough to be fucking 30 year olds.
• 7:23
  Well, well. There's a swing and a miss, but
• 7:26
  yeah, apparently I don't know, like what's more dangerous?
• 7:29
  Alcohol of the Dick because. Like.
• 7:32
  Who makes up the ages? And like who?
• 7:34
  Who makes that up? I.
• 7:35
  Just want to know who let's Penelope write young women
• 7:40
  because I've had enough. Why they me picking them all the
• 7:45
  time? Because when in doubt, wait.
• 7:47
  When in doubt, it gives OK. When in doubt, Penelope turns
• 7:51
  you out. Coming from the heart there I.
• 7:55
  Know I'm like. Poetry, you know.
• 7:58
  I know it's beautiful. But who?
• 8:00
  Who? Every single young.
• 8:02
  Female. Oh, terrible.
• 8:05
  Young woman, young girl. Terrible.
• 8:07
  Barely legal. She's unknown in the sex world.
• 8:10
  She's virgin. As of yesterday, however, she is
• 8:14
  only getting off with a knife through her throat.
• 8:16
  Oh. Duh.
• 8:17
  Christian's only slept with two people and she's straight into
• 8:21
  replay. And the first one wasn't even
• 8:23
  consenti on occasion, right? Oh yeah, the bad boyfriend.
• 8:27
  Yeah, violent. OK, so.
• 8:32
  We've got. Chris, Jen, and I'm gonna keep
• 8:35
  calling her that, and I know that's gonna rustle some
• 8:37
  jimmies, but I don't give a fuck.
• 8:38
  It's. Rustling my jimmies, you know.
• 8:41
  I can tell. But who they don't hate people
• 8:43
  who could. Spell it like that.
• 8:45
  Is it because they pronounce it Christian sometimes and Kristian
• 8:50
  other times? So get fucked.
• 8:52
  It's Chris. Jen, you're like, Oh my God, can
• 8:58
  I just say this is not a note about the actual plot, but the
• 9:01
  actress who plays Kris. Jen said certain words that gave
• 9:05
  me the. Irk and it made you piss me off
• 9:08
  the. Whole you know what?
• 9:09
  I didn't even listen to the whole.
• 9:11
  Audio book No, because she says squel and she goes I was
• 9:15
  miserable. And she goes.
• 9:19
  Tabule. He left that on the tabule and I
• 9:22
  don't know if she's trying to sound Kitty because her whole
• 9:25
  character was like. Maybe just posh.
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  Sorry nummy girl. The kids had to go to school.
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  Didn't. They anyway not be you should go
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  to school maybe but that was just my ache.
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  Valid. And I don't know if that's an
• 9:47
  accent thing or what, but it made her sound really dumb.
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  And I don't know if they were playing up the immature like I'm
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  just a girl. I'm just a girl.
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  I'm just a ghoul. I didn't.
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  Finish school. That's what she sounded like.
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  I'm just a ghoul. She's working hard.
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  Single mom. So all we know about her is she
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  has purposefully no ambitions. None.
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  She none she doesn't want to be. Aceo.
• 10:12
  She doesn't want to work. No, she does want to work.
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  No, no, just enough. Just enough.
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  To pay for popcorn and go to the movies.
• 10:24
  Why have a? Why have a reception job when
• 10:27
  you can just have a waitressing job?
• 10:32
  Reception's too high because she's too dumb.
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  You're telling me this rich girl with parents with connections
• 10:38
  had to get a waitressing job in the swamp?
• 10:41
  Yeah, because she's just like, oh, these swamp boys need my
• 10:45
  help. They need my help honestly.
• 10:48
  I cannot be a a main female character without being a
• 10:52
  waitress, duh. And a broken, dilapidated they.
• 10:57
  Probably don't even pay her right.
• 10:58
  And of course, her boss is the ringleader of all the brothers.
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  Because duh. Duh.
• 11:04
  Why would she do anything that this man directly benefit a man?
• 11:07
  This man is complaining. About money all the time.
• 11:09
  Like he's not loaded. Exactly.
• 11:11
  Also that's your problem bro, I'll just work here even if I've
• 11:16
  been hey it's just this. Big old grumpy's like doing all
• 11:19
  this work. Hire someone.
• 11:20
  Exactly. Hire a business you've got.
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  A whole ass town bitch. How?
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  How do they have a whole ass town?
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  Just. Like what do they?
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  Even do all day. Hire the drug addict you keep
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  abusing. You know that their whole house
• 11:33
  smells like weed and ass. Oh my God.
• 11:37
  OK, do you know OK, before we continue, I know this is out the
• 11:41
  end, but like he has all this money for renovations, right?
• 11:45
  But they're kitchen leaks out of the roof and they're like just
• 11:49
  leaks so much. It's just raining inside and I'm
• 11:52
  like. That's how it's so mouldy, adds
• 11:54
  to the swamp aesthetic aesthetic I'm.
• 11:59
  Like. Fix it, brother.
• 12:02
  Brother what? Oh honestly Thor cause isn't at
• 12:06
  least one or two of them. They do mechanic work and car
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  work. Fix you fucking roof bra.
• 12:13
  All of them. OK, you're telling me, Chris.
• 12:15
  Jen cares so much about her two younger siblings that she
• 12:18
  frequently leaves them in the house and ducks off to the
• 12:21
  complete other side in town to constantly make an excuse to
• 12:25
  sleep over at the swamp. House, Yeah.
• 12:27
  Why? Why does she need to be your?
• 12:30
  Parents have split up, they're all over the place.
• 12:33
  Her mum's never even at home. Exactly.
• 12:36
  They've got to live in nanny, conveniently.
• 12:38
  Conveniently, that's never paid, but still.
• 12:40
  Shows up. Oh my God, I just don't know.
• 12:44
  There's so much, can I just? Say one of the actual quotes
• 12:48
  that Christian said about her lack of ambition.
• 12:51
  Please. I still have no idea what I want
• 12:54
  to do with my life. I never wanted to be a lawyer, a
• 12:58
  stockbroker or ACEO. All I ever wanted was to love
• 13:02
  waking up, to be counted on, to make someone else's life better.
• 13:08
  And I want a man who breathes me, who craves me and needs me.
• 13:13
  Anytime this girl talks about a man I want to throw up.
• 13:17
  She literally is screaming for a House of horny men all the time.
• 13:21
  And I know we're not blaming but.
• 13:22
  She's like blaming. We're blaming, OK, She's like,
• 13:25
  I'm just so breathable, guys. I'm just so breathable.
• 13:30
  Can one of these? Breed me like all the time.
• 13:33
  I just want to be chained up in the shack.
• 13:36
  She's like. Look, I'm cleaning your house
• 13:38
  and doing your breakfast and making you little sandwiches for
• 13:42
  the day. I'm just so breathable, guys.
• 13:44
  Honestly she needs like pick me and me online lights on her head
• 13:48
  just flashing and they might actually pay attention to her.
• 13:53
  She's like. Oh, Macon actually knows my
• 13:57
  name? That one time must look like 10
• 14:00
  years into the piece. Fuck.
• 14:03
  If he hasn't learned your name by now, golly pop, he knew.
• 14:07
  You were, since you were born, Girl.
• 14:08
  Girl. Honestly.
• 14:11
  Honestly anyway, stupid going on.
• 14:15
  It never ends, never ends, never.
• 14:17
  It doesn't get better. Never ends worse, if anything.
• 14:19
  So somehow fucking role-playing in the car traces out of condoms
• 14:24
  because he's been fucking every other bitch.
• 14:25
  Yeah, she's a little offended, but not offended enough.
• 14:28
  And she's like, I'm just going to go home.
• 14:30
  Hey Carl, no time put. The Nats have been stabbed the
• 14:36
  whole house. Who ties the fuck?
• 14:40
  She shows up, all of them are looking for a random alligator.
• 14:44
  Then she's just like oh better keep an eye out for the
• 14:47
  alligator in their front yard. You're in the swamp, girl.
• 14:53
  Sorry, I just. Can't.
• 14:55
  Deal. And then she's like I.
• 14:57
  Better rub one out on the communal couch.
• 15:00
  She's like this one. One of the brothers landed in
• 15:03
  the port. The alligator.
• 15:04
  I'm so scared. Doesn't she rub one out because
• 15:07
  some random girl is in Tracer's bedroom waiting?
• 15:10
  Stairs or whatever, they're fully rooting and she's like, Oh
• 15:13
  no, what am I gonna do? And not only that, not only
• 15:17
  that, in the shadows lurks a male figure, a male figure.
• 15:21
  And then they get closer and they must see her with all her
• 15:24
  like just. Rubbing all her, she doesn't.
• 15:26
  Even. Stop.
• 15:27
  Her tits are out. Let's be to the wind.
• 15:29
  Let's shut his balls fucking. Real who's rubbing one out with
• 15:32
  their tits out on a communal couch, huh?
• 15:37
  I feel like a. Communal like the police come
• 15:42
  into it later, don't even worry about it.
• 15:44
  But don't even worry. But like have some chicken chair
• 15:46
  it's. Not even communal as in like
• 15:48
  just the household. It's communal House of the.
• 15:52
  Clubhouse. Oh my, you've got the.
• 15:55
  Game Clubhouse. The door would tell me
• 15:57
  otherwise. The door is always open for
• 15:59
  everyone. The door is unlocked, the key is
• 16:04
  not even under the mat babes, it's just so.
• 16:06
  Open. The community could come in on
• 16:11
  stage. Would she?
• 16:12
  Stop. No, she's fucking yapping in the
• 16:15
  corner. Fucking bite one of her tits off
• 16:19
  since her tits are apparently so edible.
• 16:21
  Oh my God. So anyway, male figure lurking,
• 16:25
  leaning. Leaning drinking dry.
• 16:27
  Humping even. Yes, and then?
• 16:29
  He's humping the stupid. Stuff and not only did she stay
• 16:34
  like turned on, she starts having a mentee bee and blurting
• 16:39
  out her in the most embarrassing wine.
• 16:42
  If there's anything I hate more in this world, it is fucking
• 16:46
  weird. Weird things people stay out
• 16:49
  loud in long long ass fucking. Paragraph.
• 16:52
  Yeah, yeah, it's long ass style. On the log.
• 16:55
  Oh of what? It's either love related or
• 16:57
  they're like no wow there's ending and I've never had a man
• 17:01
  breed me on this couch. I'm not growing up anytime soon.
• 17:05
  I don't wanna jog. Time is ticking.
• 17:07
  Time there's an alligator in the backyard like going.
• 17:10
  On my. Time is a splash.
• 17:13
  I only just turned 18. I had two.
• 17:15
  Kids that aren't mine, I don't. Have a job?
• 17:18
  A single mum who works 2 jobs. I.
• 17:21
  Actually help like what the? Fuck is doing it's.
• 17:26
  Like I've been. Forced to marry a man.
• 17:28
  That's an alligator I've been. Forced to marry a paedophile.
• 17:33
  The alligators imagine this man being a paedophile, but this
• 17:37
  other one not being the alligators.
• 17:39
  Like actually I'm just. Going to take myself back to the
• 17:42
  pool honestly. Why is it giving True Blood?
• 17:44
  Valid. A little bit.
• 17:46
  That swamp ass house, we almost see it.
• 17:48
  Well, they do say they like it's too hot in the house all the
• 17:51
  time. It'll work.
• 17:52
  It's got black mold and you can't tell me otherwise.
• 17:54
  It smells like feet, weed and. Ass can't get ass shit.
• 18:00
  Smells like coochie. Like but like hot.
• 18:03
  Coochie. Like like like dirty Dick
• 18:10
  coochie. Ye see?
• 18:14
  Even. I can't.
• 18:16
  You can't tell me these men aren't causing BV.
• 18:18
  Oh 100% they've created their own branch of BV but like, it's
• 18:24
  a complete separate strain. They need a vaccine at this
• 18:29
  point. Helplessly.
• 18:31
  Yeah, and she's just patient zero.
• 18:35
  Anyway. Anyway, back.
• 18:37
  To the couch humping. For some reason, blurting all
• 18:40
  that out apparently wasn't a boner killer.
• 18:42
  So. Ultimately, it was a fucking.
• 18:44
  Rise for it. He goes.
• 18:46
  Go rough. Choking, he's whispering.
• 18:54
  If you're. Expecting to read this book?
• 18:56
  Seem to play out like this. I'm so sorry.
• 19:00
  Please picture the alligator in the back please.
• 19:03
  Please. Anyway, he's whispering.
• 19:06
  I forgot what he's whispering. I don't even remember.
• 19:09
  Either no irrelevant hands clenched, rocked.
• 19:14
  Our world rocked. Our world is the best, the best
• 19:17
  mediocre sex she's ever had in her life.
• 19:19
  The best Do you know that couch was squeaking?
• 19:21
  It was squeaking. It was fucking slip sliding.
• 19:26
  Could you imagine being face deep in this couch because.
• 19:28
  She was. You're just sucking in every
• 19:33
  other football brothers. Box.
• 19:36
  It's fine. It's finally clean.
• 19:38
  Let's say it's leather. It's finally clean in this one.
• 19:43
  Just her whole face and makeup like on the pillow.
• 19:48
  No. But Can you imagine?
• 19:50
  Because the house is never cleaned.
• 19:52
  She's. Inhaling said eventually.
• 19:54
  Inhaling the dusty farts of every single brother.
• 19:57
  Getting pink eyed like it's all happening.
• 19:59
  Petri dish. Petri dish.
• 20:01
  The only. Thing that turned this whole
• 20:03
  scene around for me was him going.
• 20:09
  Nothing could turn this around for me.
• 20:12
  He's like, he says some shit like pristine pair of $1500
• 20:15
  heels and you're married to a lawyer.
• 20:17
  And he goes, I can wonder if it's my son, he's playing daddy
• 20:20
  too. I was like, OK.
• 20:22
  Like it kind of slapped a little.
• 20:23
  Bit it's slapped. And I was like, OK, OK, like
• 20:28
  maybe, maybe we could get somewhere in this book.
• 20:31
  OK, it's never giving Yard boy from Desperate Housewives.
• 20:34
  You know what I mean? It's kind of giving.
• 20:35
  It's kind of giving. Most like impregnate that bitch.
• 20:39
  Yeah, there's. No, there's lots of sperm on the
• 20:42
  couch, you know, like this. It's all sorts.
• 20:45
  But like, OK, she's impregnated by everyone, thanks, but then
• 20:49
  after all this she's like. I'm confused, who is it?
• 20:53
  Who is this man? Who is it?
• 20:54
  And he's like, they only smell like bourbon.
• 20:56
  There's only one man in that fucking house, you dumb bitch.
• 21:00
  That trees. Bourbon also she goes, shouldn't
• 21:04
  have been traced because he was upstairs unless he came down for
• 21:08
  a second round. Bitch, you said he didn't.
• 21:10
  He couldn't never make you cum. He's not doing round two babes.
• 21:13
  You said he was shit sex all the time so he was still screaming
• 21:18
  upstairs but also. Would you let him hit it raw
• 21:21
  when he was just upstairs with another bitch?
• 21:25
  Look. Dignity has left the chat.
• 21:28
  No words, no words, but there's only one of them that no other
• 21:35
  person in that house drinks bourbon and she's like, it's.
• 21:38
  He. Smells true.
• 21:39
  He smells so much like bourbon. Oh.
• 21:41
  No, she's gonna have to work her way through the entire.
• 21:43
  Family. Group, honestly, if this bitch
• 21:47
  gets on 21 and me or ancestry.com, you got a problem
• 21:50
  'cause she's hunting now the next man, she's gone for the
• 21:53
  whole family tree. She is.
• 21:55
  She's honestly going to go to the root.
• 21:57
  I'm surprised she didn't try and bang Liv.
• 21:59
  Valid honestly, but. Also I feel like at the same
• 22:02
  time even though she was banging everyone it was then harassing
• 22:05
  her so it wasn't her like actively going out of her way to
• 22:09
  hunt them down. They were like fucking.
• 22:13
  As well, because in the back of her mind, because when she
• 22:15
  talked to Clay, she was all he he ha ha.
• 22:19
  She was like, oh, well, it couldn't have been this one.
• 22:21
  And like Duda and then Clay was encouraging it.
• 22:25
  She's like, oh, so like it wasn't so who's it gonna be
• 22:29
  then? And like, gonna be no.
• 22:31
  So this is now when she's fast into being pussy detective.
• 22:37
  Yes, that's the main plot, let's be real.
• 22:39
  That's the main. Plot in the Morning Trace is
• 22:42
  like ho why are you still here? Why are you Nikki?
• 22:45
  Why are? You at the breakfast table.
• 22:47
  She's scrambling for clothes. Everyone's coming downstairs,
• 22:51
  alligator in the corner and like, she's at the table and
• 22:55
  they're like Dallas. Dallas, I'm pretty sure, is
• 22:58
  like. No woman.
• 22:59
  No, I'm pretty sure he says females like no female bitch at
• 23:04
  our table. He says some other shit like
• 23:08
  they go, oh, Clayton is allowed to be here and he's like, she's
• 23:11
  not just some random pussy. The hilarious dynamic between
• 23:18
  saying that Saints think they're better than us, but we must.
• 23:21
  Use. Them Oh my God, that's
• 23:24
  disgusting. The pocket pussies because
• 23:25
  that's what they deserve and all women have to be treated like
• 23:29
  trash. It's like OK, OK, OK, OK we get
• 23:32
  it. Like use only to go to therapy.
• 23:35
  I know you've been hurt by someone, but calm down.
• 23:38
  Literally calm down. If you were Trace, wouldn't you
• 23:41
  be like, this bitch is crazy. And she was like, no, I just
• 23:44
  keep always having car troubles and I keep always having to come
• 23:47
  back here to sleep. Like every night she's.
• 23:50
  There. Stop driving there.
• 23:52
  Get a life. Well, I'm pretty sure the reason
• 23:55
  she. Stopped driving there.
• 23:56
  Sorry, delayed. Reaction.
• 23:58
  I'm like stop driving. I'm pretty sure she has.
• 24:02
  She is dead. She's got her own car.
• 24:04
  I'm pretty sure the only reason she keeps ending up there is
• 24:07
  because she goes to pick up her brother and they follow her to
• 24:11
  the fucking Country Club. And then he's like, you need a
• 24:14
  job, you need to come work waitressing at this.
• 24:17
  And she's like, absolutely, I will come look after that town
• 24:20
  every day, be there fresh 5:00 AM in the morning.
• 24:25
  She works overtime. Hours.
• 24:28
  She doesn't ask for too many tips.
• 24:30
  If like the other girl wants tips, she's like Oh no I won't
• 24:33
  get your tips. Don't worry, what are you?
• 24:34
  Working for then pitch. She starts roller skating in
• 24:37
  there. Like that's not the weirdest
• 24:39
  shit ever. Yeah, how are you in a roller
• 24:42
  skate in a swampy ass bar? So are they saying it's like a
• 24:45
  Hooters and she's? It's only her.
• 24:50
  It's it's only her. And I know not only that the
• 24:53
  girl she like far ahead, far ahead, this is we'll go back,
• 24:58
  but far ahead roller skates. The other girl that works with
• 25:02
  her steals her roller skates and then tries to get with her man.
• 25:05
  Honestly though, disgusting. I wish a bitch would.
• 25:09
  A witch of a witch. A bitch.
• 25:11
  A witch bitch. So not only does she have a
• 25:14
  problem of not knowing who dicked her down.
• 25:16
  No. Obviously like a a Cinderella.
• 25:20
  Story you can't tell me all, every single one of them are the
• 25:23
  same shape, build and fucking height.
• 25:26
  It was stuck in there, girl, You just got to be sure.
• 25:28
  He has. Got to do the footwork, OK all.
• 25:31
  She had to do was open her eyes when he walked.
• 25:33
  Away she's a pussy detective morass she's.
• 25:36
  Got to do the legwork, OK? She knew the whole time.
• 25:41
  She knew the whole. Time.
• 25:42
  Let's be real. Yeah, and I will die on that
• 25:45
  hill also. OK, apart from this problem,
• 25:48
  which is her problem, her mum's got a problem because her
• 25:51
  parents separated and her mum's like, what am I supposed to do
• 25:55
  with my stupid female offspring that's just turned 18?
• 25:59
  Yeah, I know. I'll marry her off to a
• 26:02
  paedophile, essentially, Yeah. And his name is Jerome Watson.
• 26:07
  Jerome. Which sounds like the most
• 26:09
  paedophilic cartoon character he's.
• 26:11
  Ever 31 What? He's only 30.
• 26:14
  One, why did they make him sound like he was fucking 60?
• 26:18
  Because him and. Him and Macon.
• 26:22
  Used to fucking bat. No, no, they used to bash each
• 26:26
  other and like. So we're supposed to find 131
• 26:29
  year old hot and 1 like a pedophile.
• 26:31
  Exactly. Saints First Swamp originally
• 26:34
  was them two. It.
• 26:36
  Comes up in at the the little the little town party thing that
• 26:44
  they go to with. OK sorry but no 31 year old is
• 26:47
  called Jerome. Literally he sounds like he's
• 26:50
  pushing 70 anyway. He acts like it, so she's trying
• 26:56
  to set him up with this man. Yep, she's trying to just sell
• 26:59
  her off. Not only that, somehow someone
• 27:02
  has got a photo of her naked and is sending it around their
• 27:06
  Country Club and Jerome's just like, yeah, like send it around,
• 27:11
  send around this 18 year old girl that's about to be married
• 27:14
  to me. And that photo is probably old.
• 27:16
  Yeah. So if anything, it's probably
• 27:17
  from when she was banging. Like Trace, I reckon.
• 27:20
  My every smile. That's right.
• 27:22
  Yeah. So from before?
• 27:25
  Yikes. Which I mean that in itself is a
• 27:27
  crime. It is a crime because you're.
• 27:29
  Circulating. Child.
• 27:33
  Images. Images.
• 27:35
  Yeah, disgusting. So anyway, that's like a weird
• 27:39
  separate problem. Why is there always paedophilia
• 27:41
  in these weird bully books? Like I don't understand.
• 27:44
  I think it's just. Like to make them.
• 27:47
  Bad characters that they tell, Yeah, like, but.
• 27:50
  Macon's the same age. I know.
• 27:54
  I didn't know that, I literally thought he was.
• 27:55
  A no, they are the exact same age.
• 27:57
  I'm wondering if like I don't understand.
• 28:02
  I don't understand totally. Honestly, I don't know if it's
• 28:05
  supposed to make make them seem better or worse.
• 28:09
  They're just as bad. As each.
• 28:10
  Other they're horrible. So anyway, Christians like you
• 28:14
  know what my purpose in life is? To become the tryst 6 venom free
• 28:19
  bang maid. Yes and also I work at their
• 28:22
  bar, I clean their house, I fuck whoever wants to fuck.
• 28:26
  Also cool. Not only that, every time they
• 28:30
  have a conversation with her, they're like, you're going to be
• 28:33
  a Jaeger one day all the time. They're like you're going to be
• 28:37
  a part of this. I don't know who is going to be
• 28:38
  a girl, but one of us. One of us is going to be stuck
• 28:43
  with you for the rest of our lives.
• 28:44
  Wasn't it giving joining the Wolf Pack in twilight?
• 28:47
  No, it is because what are the perks?
• 28:51
  Sorry what is anybody getting by joining in this weird booty ass
• 28:56
  weed smelling fucking gang house Because it's not nice to live in
• 29:01
  there. It's a mansion by the end of it.
• 29:04
  It's what? A mansion by the end of it.
• 29:07
  OK, Swamp Mansion. It's a swamp mansion.
• 29:12
  She was rich enough to live in a normal mansion from the get just
• 29:15
  from nepotism. Yeah, but she broke.
• 29:18
  Yeah, but her parents had to die at some point.
• 29:20
  True. Also like she could have been
• 29:23
  rich rich. Yeah, she could have just
• 29:25
  squinted when she ever she went out with Jerome.
• 29:28
  He can't be. That ugly if he's 31, like
• 29:30
  surely he's still got a bit of hair.
• 29:32
  Like, let's be real, I thought he was old I.
• 29:34
  I changed, I don't. See the whole I?
• 29:36
  Don't think it was that he was not like attractive, I think he
• 29:40
  was just an asshole. He was a barefoot and pregnant
• 29:44
  kind of guy and so was the other one.
• 29:47
  I don't like. So are all the men in this book.
• 29:51
  Oh, Jesus. OK, so there's a bit where Chris
• 29:54
  Jen fixates on each guy at a time.
• 29:59
  Or whoever has more need. Whoever loves bombs her the
• 30:03
  most. Hey, yeah, whoever's going
• 30:04
  through the roughest time at the exact time she's like, I better
• 30:07
  jump on the Dick. Yeah, and they honestly latch
• 30:10
  onto her like no tomorrow. And Trace is done.
• 30:14
  Yeah, Trace is done. He's gone.
• 30:16
  He knows that's the end. Yeah.
• 30:17
  He's like, they had a little chat and it's like, I'm not in
• 30:19
  love with you. Yep, That's all good.
• 30:21
  And it is what it is. It is what it is.
• 30:24
  And then the next one with the problem is Iron, because he's
• 30:26
  going to jail. Yeah.
• 30:28
  And then she realises he's going to jail like the next day or
• 30:31
  whatever it was. So it of course has to be her
• 30:33
  mission to sit on that Dick. It has to be, and honestly, he
• 30:38
  was. It has to be.
• 30:39
  And honestly, he was right in there too.
• 30:41
  He was like. He's like, I'm going to get
• 30:42
  locked. Up I'm going to get your car
• 30:44
  fixed and he's like I notice says was a lot of problems and
• 30:48
  I'm going to fix your car and then I'm going to harass you
• 30:50
  every day like no tomorrow. I don't even like what's
• 30:55
  definitive about iron. Like he gets in fights and
• 30:58
  that's he's got an assault charge.
• 31:01
  There's nothing, nothing, nothing.
• 31:03
  He's got nothing. There's nothing.
• 31:05
  Nothing special about. Him he that I honestly reckon
• 31:08
  that's why she put him in prison as a.
• 31:11
  Yeah, like. What's He goes to work every
• 31:13
  day. He gets angry because he's
• 31:14
  bored. He wants to be a pilot.
• 31:18
  And that's only revealed after he's already been in jail.
• 31:21
  Like he had no ambition before that.
• 31:23
  No. He's the one that reacts first,
• 31:26
  so he's the one who gets in trouble.
• 31:28
  And. He was neglected because he was
• 31:30
  the youngest one and everything was glossed over and he doesn't
• 31:33
  know. Is he the youngest?
• 31:34
  Was Tracey youngest? Oh well, he's like the second
• 31:37
  youngest. It doesn't matter, they're all
• 31:39
  like 2 years apart at some point.
• 31:41
  Honestly, it's terrible. If she shows up to a dress up
• 31:44
  party and immediately in this crowded room full of people,
• 31:49
  they're playing truth or death. That's always like how what is
• 31:54
  going? On they just went straight into
• 31:56
  it and she's like. Imagine not being ready and
• 32:00
  you're just wearing some granny panties or something.
• 32:02
  Can I just dug up to the room real quick?
• 32:05
  I'm like I'm. Not even sure she just.
• 32:06
  Didn't even get they're surrounded by people.
• 32:09
  Trace is like oh OK, I'll just go wait in the corner while you
• 32:12
  try to fuck my brother. She's like, do you eat girls
• 32:15
  out? And he's like, take off your
• 32:17
  clothes, bitch in front of everyone.
• 32:20
  Choosing who wins. I started off sexy.
• 32:23
  It was very much a are you going to eat me out?
• 32:26
  He's stripping her. It's not that sexy because
• 32:28
  they're in a room full of fucking 500 people.
• 32:30
  Like. But then she like, he's taking
• 32:33
  her panties off. I'm pretty sure this is where it
• 32:35
  happens. And she goes, do you regret
• 32:37
  doing everything? Are you going to regret leaving
• 32:39
  your family? And I'm like, go, what are you
• 32:42
  doing? She's like, let's get sad really
• 32:43
  quick. She's like, you don't have no
• 32:46
  job. No fucking shit.
• 32:48
  And he's just like, OK, Yikes, they're running around with red
• 32:52
  paint. No idea.
• 32:54
  No idea. No.
• 32:56
  OK, so the reason they start fucking is because after this
• 33:00
  he's like, we're going to play this game where we run around
• 33:03
  and when you get paint on you, you have to strip a clothing
• 33:05
  item off, right? Cool, cool, we've all played.
• 33:08
  That one. And he's like, you didn't know
• 33:11
  it. Not in my house.
• 33:12
  I'm. Running around and she's like,
• 33:14
  do you actually want me to strip in front of everyone?
• 33:16
  And then he's kind of pissed about it and he's yelling at her
• 33:19
  and then he's like, I just want you to stay for the night.
• 33:21
  And then of course, because he's sad, they fuck.
• 33:24
  Yeah, which was her ultimate mission anyway, because she knew
• 33:28
  he was being locked up. You know what gave me the most
• 33:30
  ultimate ick? He was in there for one day and
• 33:34
  she was spiralling out of control.
• 33:35
  Oh yes. I miss.
• 33:37
  Him. She's practically at the gates
• 33:38
  of the jail being like, Oh yeah, like, we all love you like.
• 33:43
  Fucking you kidding? For two fucking days he was in
• 33:45
  there. Second day, fucking forgot about
• 33:48
  him. Was moving on to the next
• 33:49
  brother already. Yeah, like.
• 33:51
  She. Didn't give a fuck and she never
• 33:53
  even. Called or wrote to him ever
• 33:54
  again. Ever.
• 33:55
  No. And you're telling me this is
• 33:57
  Miss Empathetic Miss obsessed with all of them?
• 34:00
  She didn't even care, she was too busy spiraling with her ego
• 34:04
  about everyone watching her fuck him in the backyard because
• 34:07
  she's fucking him on a pool chair in the rain and she's like
• 34:10
  someone in the window was watching me.
• 34:12
  Well, yeah, you're doing it out in the open, bitch.
• 34:15
  In someone else's house. And why was it always about
• 34:18
  other people watching in almost every sex scene?
• 34:22
  Yeah, every single one. Almost.
• 34:23
  Yeah, all of. Them except the last couple.
• 34:27
  But even that other one, Macon, was on the phone.
• 34:30
  Yes, this is the dangling of incest.
• 34:33
  It's just. So anyway, she kind of, because
• 34:36
  Ian's gone, she remembers that Trace is kind of still a thing,
• 34:40
  right? Because he exists.
• 34:41
  And then for some weird reason, he just dips into her life with
• 34:44
  her younger siblings and cosplays being an amazing
• 34:48
  boyfriend when he never even met them, probably when they were
• 34:51
  actually dating on and off for ages.
• 34:53
  And then he just comes in the scene and he's like, everyone,
• 34:56
  let's go get ice cream. I'm like the fun boyfriend I'm.
• 35:01
  Like because. Nothing's worse than that when
• 35:03
  the guy just comes in and wants to do all the fun things and
• 35:06
  then you're like, I have to put them to bed in an hour and now
• 35:08
  you're getting them all riled up on sugar.
• 35:10
  I don't understand that bit at all though because he had no
• 35:13
  interest in her and then he was like, I'm carrying her across
• 35:16
  the threshold like we just had a wedding.
• 35:18
  I know. And it was even worse because
• 35:20
  he's like, this is the first time I've been in this house and
• 35:22
  like, we could have a future. And and then he was telling her
• 35:26
  all about how he wants to have a pub and now how it was so out of
• 35:30
  his reach. Bitch, your family owns a bar.
• 35:33
  How is a pub so out of reach? And she's like, Oh yeah, and you
• 35:37
  can have like velvet and like fucking emerald seats and shit.
• 35:40
  Just bitch extend the pub my friend.
• 35:44
  Just fucking renovate the bar, like what?
• 35:47
  And run the pub. It has a home feeling.
• 35:49
  And now all of a sudden I want to be a homely guy and I want to
• 35:52
  be a family man. And I bitch when you're the
• 35:55
  youngest out of all of. Them had the chop.
• 35:58
  He's a snip. 21 years old. He's never having kids.
• 36:02
  He's banging a new chick every night and then he has to
• 36:06
  cosplay. They always do this to make the
• 36:08
  man look more attractive in books when they cosplay,
• 36:10
  interacting with children to make him look.
• 36:12
  But he's lifting her up in front of the kids and like hauling her
• 36:16
  out, which is like inappropriate in front of the kids.
• 36:18
  It's like what? Oh no.
• 36:20
  And she? Goes oh and then armies.
• 36:22
  Is the one that got away. No, but the worst thing is
• 36:24
  armies in the background. He's like, oh, she's such a good
• 36:26
  mother. She mothers her siblings on a
• 36:29
  day. Literally the guardian of her
• 36:31
  siblings because old mate was sick of not getting paid but
• 36:35
  also she's never there with the siblings.
• 36:37
  The siblings are. Or just such a prop?
• 36:39
  They're such a prop, and not only are they not with her, but
• 36:42
  they're always with them. Yeah, in some random way.
• 36:45
  Yep. OK, what I don't understand
• 36:47
  about her as well. While we're talking about the
• 36:49
  kids, you have this big ass mansion, clean electricity, nice
• 36:54
  beds, their bedroom, their food, their house, their bullshit,
• 36:59
  literally everything in this house.
• 37:01
  It's just you and them, right? Why are you taking them to this
• 37:04
  house that is full of random men?
• 37:07
  Drugs. Random chicks Doors always open
• 37:10
  doors. Gang members.
• 37:11
  There's people loudly fucking all the time.
• 37:13
  They're very open about it. And those are all huddled in
• 37:16
  your friend's room. Terrifying, weird, the.
• 37:20
  And then? You're just voice.
• 37:21
  Knockout to a party there once. Himself.
• 37:24
  Yeah, he snuck out to her highlighter party.
• 37:27
  But it's like these kids are not supervised.
• 37:30
  No. They are probably the most
• 37:32
  neglected kids in the. World like they were neglected
• 37:35
  that way but one scene she was picking him up when he was on
• 37:37
  drugs just for real. I know it's just but she acts
• 37:43
  like she's doing so much for them.
• 37:45
  Be for real then. Be for real.
• 37:48
  Be for real. Then we go straight from the
• 37:51
  fucking weird shit to her wanting to look after make them
• 37:55
  again any chance she gets. She's like, I just she goes into
• 38:00
  his house. No fucking reason.
• 38:01
  This man's not eating. She he knows he's not eating,
• 38:04
  knows he's drinking all the time.
• 38:06
  All he does is work he's grumpy, he just wants to be left alone.
• 38:09
  He literally screams all day not giving him a reason but he
• 38:13
  screams all day that he's so sick of looking after other
• 38:16
  people. So she's.
• 38:17
  Had enough? She's had enough, so of course
• 38:19
  she's stripping in his fucking workshop with a hose and she's
• 38:25
  like, I just, she literally is going.
• 38:27
  You take care of everyone. I just want to take care of you.
• 38:30
  You're 18, girl. Isn't this after she saw him
• 38:34
  with the fucking torture rehab center as well?
• 38:38
  I feel like she did that right after because she went over
• 38:42
  there unannounced and then she witnessed him with the guy
• 38:46
  locked up. Yes, in this like shipping
• 38:48
  container or some. Shit.
• 38:50
  Yes, and then not only did she not call the cops and make an
• 38:54
  anonymous tip, she was making fully grown man we have knowing
• 38:57
  anything right? She just goes.
• 38:59
  Well, I know Macon's a good guy, so there must be a reason he's
• 39:02
  saving this guy money on rehab. Bitch what?
• 39:06
  This lie is. Strung out O's making money and
• 39:09
  it's cool that he's left in a shipping container.
• 39:12
  B. For real.
• 39:13
  This man is real. And if anything, it made her
• 39:16
  froth him she made him froth. So immediately she's on the
• 39:20
  sink. Oh.
• 39:21
  My. God on the workshop sink toes,
• 39:23
  toes toe curl, toe curl straightened, even pointed, toes
• 39:30
  pointed. Honestly though.
• 39:33
  Hose on her clit and he's just standing there.
• 39:36
  Power. Washer.
• 39:37
  Power washer. Gurney.
• 39:38
  Gurney, obviously. Get rid of that yeasty.
• 39:41
  He probably just was power blasting all that like dunk out
• 39:47
  and that's why he didn't want to stick it in just then.
• 39:50
  He was like, can this? Go up anywhere else.
• 39:55
  The intensity like he's. Just watching it, she's like,
• 39:58
  get doing some weird. I want to take care of you, cook
• 40:02
  you dinner every night. Where she goes, oh fuck no, that
• 40:06
  was without me. Don't.
• 40:07
  Don't, don't save that for later.
• 40:08
  Save that for later. She's doing this and then she
• 40:11
  turns off the tap and she's like, Oh no, like he's not into
• 40:16
  it. But then he's like turns the tap
• 40:18
  on the hose off, tap on, washes the fucking vacuum nozzle and
• 40:23
  then vacuums straight. Either this vacuum is the
• 40:28
  shittest vacuum in the world or have clip doesn't it's not
• 40:32
  attached anymore. That's.
• 40:33
  What I mean like, OK, that's what I wanted to do A.
• 40:36
  Workshop because it's an. Industrial size vacuum.
• 40:39
  An industrial vacuum. On the.
• 40:41
  Clinic What if he. Accidentally pressed the
• 40:43
  blowback situation like because. Honestly, I feel.
• 40:48
  Like I'd rather have and it's fucking wood chips straight.
• 40:50
  Literally rather have a leaf blower on my clit than a fucking
• 40:54
  industrial vacuum. I'm sorry, I don't want the
• 40:57
  internal organs getting. Sucked out from it, it's.
• 41:01
  Like, well, does this not fucking bruise the shit out of
• 41:03
  me? No, she hasn't got a clit
• 41:05
  anymore. It's gone, gone.
• 41:07
  It's orbiting like Katy Perry is.
• 41:09
  This left the chat. She's like the best orgasm in
• 41:15
  life. Bitch girl, go to hospital
• 41:17
  anymore. It's gone.
• 41:20
  It's come off you. Don't have that. 1.
• 41:26
  I'm sorry. Guys, seems no more.
• 41:28
  Because it's gone. Honestly though, what if the
• 41:32
  vacuum sucked the clitty so hard it turned into an Audi and then
• 41:37
  it turned into enlarged into a penis in the instant trench?
• 41:42
  Snotty. She's just got a micro Dick now.
• 41:49
  Oh my God. Honestly no, but like, I don't
• 41:53
  care. Even if you rinsed.
• 41:55
  It off that's not antibacterial. I'm just the workshop floor is
• 42:01
  now in direct contact with my clinic germs.
• 42:04
  Aside germs. Aside germs.
• 42:07
  Aside. Germs aside.
• 42:09
  Germs are important. The problem?
• 42:10
  Is this shit's probably for cleaning up fucking sheds?
• 42:15
  Yeah, so does. No, but the like garage ones all
• 42:19
  like like industrial ones that they probably got.
• 42:21
  Loud. It's fucking strong dude.
• 42:24
  You. Can't even hear her scream when
• 42:26
  Oakley is being ripped to the. Fuck off.
• 42:31
  Slips A20IN there and he's like I'm relaxed now what he.
• 42:36
  Could. No, he goes.
• 42:37
  That was. Relaxing.
• 42:39
  And then he leaves. OK.
• 42:46
  And then she's like, I felt bad about myself, Duh.
• 42:50
  She's like sitting at naked fucking.
• 42:53
  Her jeans were around her ankles still.
• 42:56
  Covered. In water pussy out.
• 42:59
  Honestly, when isn't her pussy out?
• 43:01
  When I haven't heard a time. Maybe that's why it's not
• 43:05
  affected by the vacuum from the overexposure.
• 43:07
  I feel like. Pussy chafing at this point, Oh
• 43:12
  my God. She is past friction rash
• 43:14
  because that shit's so toughened up.
• 43:17
  Honestly, Callus is on the pussy.
• 43:20
  I just I. Don't know what to do with that
• 43:23
  her. Recovery after it was like no
• 43:26
  tomorrow because I swear like pages away she's.
• 43:29
  Fucking Army again. I thought she hadn't fucked Army
• 43:33
  yet. No, she gets fingered at a
• 43:35
  party. No.
• 43:38
  OK, at this party where she's getting fingered right?
• 43:42
  If which one? It's a highlighter.
• 43:44
  Party. There's so many parties and so
• 43:47
  many fingerings. And he's just like we are
• 43:49
  fucking. No, but why were they dry
• 43:52
  humping on the side of some shed somewhere?
• 43:54
  Like in the backyard next to a potted plant.
• 43:56
  No, they were inside next to a like a fucking clock, a whole
• 43:59
  one of the grands of the plot. Time.
• 44:02
  No, they were next to all. Grand but there was a time
• 44:05
  outside in the yard and. Who knows?
• 44:09
  Who knows at this point. She's getting fingered at a
• 44:12
  highlighter party and I'm like, what a surprise.
• 44:15
  He's like, she's like, oh, we're not fucking.
• 44:18
  He's like we are fucking. This is me fingering you as
• 44:21
  fucking. Just say you have a micro penis.
• 44:24
  No the problem no where I'm going with this.
• 44:27
  Is. The book with Clayton and Olivia
• 44:30
  where they were scissoring 24/7 and they're like, oh, we've
• 44:33
  never fucked. I'm like go, how did we go from
• 44:36
  never fucking in this one to fingering is fucking in this
• 44:39
  one? That's a leap and a jump.
• 44:41
  It is a picker picker. You're telling me they grew up
• 44:44
  in the whole same house and believed two different things?
• 44:46
  Oh my God, probably. You know what was this the party
• 44:50
  that she masterminded this whole Instagram story?
• 44:54
  Yeah, to get army to come there because they were having a shot
• 44:58
  with me and tray and live and that was her huge master plan.
• 45:02
  Yes. What?
• 45:04
  To stop, to stop all the people going over to the tracks and
• 45:07
  like destroying the cemetery. Who?
• 45:10
  Cares who? Cares.
• 45:12
  Yes, I'm doing at this point. Every two seconds, this girl is
• 45:15
  like not another Jaeger in prison, but she's want to go.
• 45:18
  Jealous because she was like these girls in their skimpy
• 45:22
  outfits are trying to get with one and all all of my men yes
• 45:27
  and she goes don't cross the. Tracks.
• 45:29
  Wasn't that traced Ellison like Army?
• 45:31
  Yeah. Yeah, she was a little, I think
• 45:34
  she not offended by Dallas. She was a little offended by a
• 45:37
  trace. She's like, oh, he's just
• 45:38
  getting all this attention. I promised the girls they would
• 45:42
  be here. I didn't think you were going to
• 45:43
  be here. That's.
• 45:45
  Right. Yeah, like you.
• 45:46
  Can't pick and choose who you want all the time?
• 45:49
  Anyway, continuing, she looks Milo in a pantry, right?
• 45:54
  Yeah. And then what even happened with
• 45:55
  that? OK so they finger outside then I
• 45:59
  think she leaves or something or goes outside or her brother says
• 46:03
  some random shit. She's left Army alone.
• 46:05
  Army goes and lets him out of the cupboard.
• 46:07
  Thank God though because she locked him in a fucking pantry.
• 46:10
  And army goes. He's coming out like sweaty and
• 46:13
  like he can't breathe. This guy almost committed a
• 46:15
  murder because she just locked him in there with no vents, and
• 46:19
  then she was like, oh, another Jaeger doesn't go to prison
• 46:22
  because you almost went to prison.
• 46:25
  Honestly, I feel like she'd dig into the family vault and get
• 46:28
  lawyers to pay and say that anyone could have locked him in
• 46:30
  there because like, who's going to know?
• 46:32
  But the whole purpose of that was to prevent them going out
• 46:36
  before the stupid lockdown for the storm.
• 46:38
  Yeah, you're telling me this is a hardened teenage 20 year old
• 46:42
  gang and they're not allowed to go out side if it starts
• 46:46
  raining? What?
• 46:47
  B. For real B.
• 46:48
  For fucking real. There's alligators in the front
• 46:51
  yard and you're telling me that? Oh no, if the POPO say that we
• 46:56
  have to stay home, we're on lockdown.
• 46:58
  Just hold on a point, put a fence.
• 47:00
  OK hear me out. They were catching alligators in
• 47:03
  the 1st chapter, right? Put a fence around your
• 47:05
  cemetery, add a fucking pond and just put a whole heap of
• 47:09
  alligators on there. Whole motored in there.
• 47:12
  Yeah, No one's going into your cemetery for treasure.
• 47:15
  But if you care. So much, just put some CCTV and
• 47:18
  then a notification on your phone.
• 47:20
  Ridiculous. But it never really amounted to
• 47:22
  anything important at the end. Well, Milo just leaves.
• 47:26
  And they don't get I'm like, cool.
• 47:28
  And they just throw down like a car, the spikes.
• 47:31
  Mm Hmm. But then 2 seconds after Milo
• 47:35
  goes over the spikes, so is a fucking Christian.
• 47:37
  Because she's an idiot and she loves having slap tires but.
• 47:42
  Dallas was like leave them there and they were like no you gotta
• 47:45
  put there was 3 fucking people there.
• 47:47
  Pull. You could have pulled them off
• 47:49
  the road. And wasn't her siblings in the
• 47:52
  car or? Something.
• 47:52
  Yeah, yeah. And.
• 47:54
  Then Megan was like, bring her back or some shit and like, Oh
• 47:57
  my God. No, I think, I think army bring
• 48:00
  her back and they were like, we gotta fix it before make him
• 48:02
  nose because he's paying for her tyres.
• 48:04
  Well then you guys shouldn't keep fucking with her tyres.
• 48:08
  I forgot all about, you know how Penelope Douglas always does all
• 48:11
  the song references. I just ignore me.
• 48:14
  I do as well, but I just. How are you out here picking
• 48:17
  random songs? Also your taste is like 100
• 48:20
  years old at this point. People.
• 48:22
  Her taste. Is like not listening to this
• 48:24
  music. Her taste is like the 1980s or
• 48:26
  some shit. I get it, the 80s were great,
• 48:29
  but also you've got 18. 18 year olds.
• 48:31
  Reading. No, they're reading.
• 48:34
  Your audience for your book is fucking 16 to 20 year olds be
• 48:38
  for real? Probably.
• 48:39
  Probably younger. No one knows what you're saying.
• 48:43
  No one knows these songs. No one knows.
• 48:45
  These songs also how you can tell Penelope is older than all
• 48:49
  of us. We're going straight into
• 48:51
  Thanksgiving. What in The Twilight Saga is
• 48:54
  this outfit? Because she's going into
• 48:55
  Thanksgiving and it goes. I pull on a pair of tight Jean
• 48:59
  shorts and roll them up just above my knee.
• 49:03
  EW. And then I borrow a cropped
• 49:06
  white blouse from Liv, buttoning it up to my neck.
• 49:09
  And then I brush out my hair. What is she?
• 49:11
  Wearing. She's wearing Bermuda shorts and
• 49:15
  a button up to her neck. Yes.
• 49:18
  OK. But also tight Jean shorts.
• 49:22
  I roll them to above my knee. Why are you rolling them?
• 49:27
  You know, were they not 3/4 beforehand?
• 49:30
  Yeah, what are you wearing? Why are you dressed like a 40
• 49:35
  year old woman? Belly's out because it's
• 49:37
  cropped. Yes.
• 49:39
  But it's buttoned up at no sleeves.
• 49:41
  It literally just says cropped white blouse.
• 49:44
  Blouse. It's giving long denim skirt not
• 49:52
  even long denim skirt cargo. Skirt.
• 49:54
  Not only that, these are the sort of things that people say
• 49:57
  to her. Fuck you slut.
• 49:58
  The. Fucking family.
• 50:01
  Here, knees away. She's dressed like that.
• 50:05
  Fuck you slut, fuck you miss just put.
• 50:09
  Your fucking. Titties away.
• 50:11
  Put your knees away. Oh my God, no.
• 50:14
  But. She just goes downstairs.
• 50:16
  Thank God I glossed over that. Who?
• 50:18
  Yeah, I'm surprised you did. Who's wearing that?
• 50:21
  Honestly, no wonder why all the boys want to peel those jeans
• 50:24
  down. I'm not.
• 50:26
  OK, I know. I remember nothing other than
• 50:28
  her like out there Thanksgiving lighting their house with
• 50:32
  candles and she's like, it's a tradition.
• 50:34
  Go home. Then they're like.
• 50:36
  Why is she trying to start a tradition in someone else's
• 50:38
  family home? Fuck off, fuck off.
• 50:41
  Not only with that every time she every time she does some
• 50:44
  random you weird little bitch. Every time she does this random
• 50:55
  like tradition or she'll be like, I'm just opening the
• 50:57
  window to let some air in. She's like your computer.
• 51:05
  She does shit like this all the. Time and they're like I dare not
• 51:08
  think they like side eye her and because she did it and they shit
• 51:11
  they're. Like fuck, just leave it.
• 51:15
  She's. Singing loudly along to the
• 51:17
  music and they. Turn it off.
• 51:19
  They're honestly like, oh, the things we had to put up for.
• 51:23
  Free pussy in this. House but not only that they
• 51:26
  turn off the music and then Megan's like turn it back on
• 51:29
  today it's. Like help?
• 51:31
  Help. He's like, make this girl.
• 51:33
  Happy she can't carry this song on her own.
• 51:38
  He's like. She'll leave if you don't let
• 51:40
  her sing. Happy wife, happy.
• 51:45
  Life. He's like my.
• 51:46
  Children's coming up. What do you think they would
• 51:48
  sing? Together.
• 51:50
  Oh fucking what is that song in the book where he had a repeat
• 51:54
  all the time and it was the one where he was paying her money to
• 51:57
  sleep with him but he was buried?
• 51:59
  Do you know which book I'm talking about?
• 52:02
  Oh. Oh, a different book.
• 52:03
  Yes. Oh fucking hell, it was that guy
• 52:06
  that I fucking hate. And then his girlfriend was the
• 52:11
  older one. Yes, all the leaves are.
• 52:14
  Old, yeah. Leaves are brown and this guy is
• 52:17
  great and this guy is great. Honestly, what the fuck?
• 52:26
  Because if you read that. Book someone who's like an
• 52:28
  oxygenarian like sorry from the 70s.
• 52:33
  Honestly these authors need to be called out more.
• 52:36
  They could just go into chachi PT spit out popular sort
• 52:40
  current. Sort they don't even need to do
• 52:42
  that. Spotify and then just hit
• 52:44
  hottest hit playlist #1. Something in this century.
• 52:48
  Please fuck this shit. It's not even that hot.
• 52:52
  Go on TikTok. Randomly iron.
• 52:56
  Calls. And speaks to Army on the phone,
• 52:59
  Yeah. And then like, Christian's just
• 53:01
  there, I guess. And then Macon's refusing to
• 53:04
  chat on the phone, pretending like he can't hear that there's
• 53:06
  a phone call going on. And then Army hangs up the
• 53:09
  phone. He pull, rushes nation.
• 53:11
  He's like and he just runs. Oh.
• 53:14
  Yeah, and he tackles him in the ground and he's like.
• 53:16
  Fuck. You for not admitting you love.
• 53:18
  Hanging on the phone. OK, wait, wait before you
• 53:21
  continue. Before.
• 53:22
  Before this. It's worse.
• 53:23
  Isn't this exactly when Army got Christian pinned to the fridge?
• 53:28
  She's. Close by, Yeah.
• 53:31
  Doesn't the phone call happen? She's pinned to the fridge.
• 53:35
  He's trying to fuck Christian on the fridge and then make him
• 53:37
  like you need to get out of here and then all of this is
• 53:40
  spiraling at the same time. And not only that, he's like,
• 53:43
  bro, what the fuck's wrong with you?
• 53:45
  We need to fix you. So me, you and Christian are
• 53:49
  just going to go out on the boat and fucking mine.
• 53:52
  Like where did this plot come from?
• 53:54
  So we're just going to haul her into the fucking, I don't know,
• 53:58
  the Tenny. What do they?
• 53:59
  What boat do they have? Fucking boat in the swamp with
• 54:02
  all the alligators. That's what I don't understand,
• 54:03
  like where did this plot come from?
• 54:05
  Army? You didn't come up with this
• 54:06
  just now. Honestly, why did she fuck this
• 54:08
  man? Because no.
• 54:10
  No. Which one?
• 54:11
  Army, because Bacon's the only one.
• 54:14
  She's like, she's literally like, no, no, I don't wanna do
• 54:17
  that. And Bacon's like, you need to
• 54:19
  leave. Like he's being fucking insane.
• 54:21
  Yeah. And Army's still going.
• 54:23
  He's like, we just need to fuck her.
• 54:24
  We need to. Fuck her all night and then
• 54:26
  never think about it again. But she's like, no.
• 54:28
  I don't actually want to and he's like, he's just not.
• 54:31
  Hearing it and I think that's when he pins her to the fridge
• 54:34
  and she's trying to push him up like a way and he's like you.
• 54:37
  Just need that barely legal pussy.
• 54:39
  Oh. My God, love your brother.
• 54:41
  Again, make him like make him get the fuck out of here.
• 54:47
  I mean, he doesn't get better, but at least in this moment he's
• 54:50
  the only one making sense. But then like Christian was like
• 54:55
  Oh my God, I think I'm falling for army.
• 54:58
  What? This man who thinks you're going
• 55:00
  to fix his brother's depression. By spit roasting you on the open
• 55:07
  ocean. Not even.
• 55:09
  It wouldn't even. Be the ocean, it'd be fucking
• 55:11
  the mangroves and the swamp is. In.
• 55:14
  One inch of swamp water just. Straight up straight, actually
• 55:18
  know what they do have a boat. Because remember, they go out to
• 55:20
  some random pier and it's this big ass fucking yacht.
• 55:24
  Yeah. So they've got all this money,
• 55:25
  but they've got to make her working for next and I don't
• 55:28
  even like what they're. Putting that go to work, she's
• 55:31
  got no time. She's either at work or working
• 55:33
  in their house. Honestly though, the things that
• 55:36
  he was saying he wanted to do with her, I don't think she was
• 55:38
  going to come back alive. Anyway, back to bull rushing.
• 55:42
  Oh no, that's literally where it went.
• 55:44
  That's all great, their entire house, the police are dragging
• 55:47
  army out. They're locking him up for the
• 55:49
  night. Christians fucking having a
• 55:51
  meltdown. Let the man get taken.
• 55:53
  He just, he was literally coercing you into shit you do
• 55:57
  not want to do. Like let's be for real.
• 55:59
  And the mansion's like taking it her too.
• 56:01
  OK, the the next bit is just like.
• 56:03
  It's what the. Fuck, because not only are they
• 56:06
  taken in the cop car, she's handcuffed too and the police
• 56:10
  are like yeah yeah this looks consensual when they like open
• 56:14
  the door or whatever. Later when he's full about to
• 56:16
  thrust into her, Oh my, they don't even check.
• 56:19
  Well, no. Not only that.
• 56:21
  Like they're driving. Her hands are behind her,
• 56:24
  cuffed. He's fingering her in the car.
• 56:28
  And then she's like, not saying anything, but he's like, you
• 56:31
  better hurry up and get out and turn off the tape.
• 56:33
  They don't turn off the fucking tape.
• 56:35
  They're like automatic. I don't think you can just flick
• 56:38
  them on and off. And then she acts all surprised
• 56:41
  later. Why are they like, oh cool,
• 56:43
  yeah, use our police cruiser as a fucking mobile bang, boss.
• 56:49
  And we'll just, we'll come tap on the door when you're
• 56:52
  finished. Honestly takes 2 seconds.
• 56:54
  Just fucking open the door. Take her out literally.
• 56:57
  But they didn't. Even check if she was cool with
• 56:59
  what was going on. They were like, Oh my good Sir,
• 57:02
  have you done pounding the hoe? Yeah, but even in that scene
• 57:07
  they were no even they they were both like hurry up and get out
• 57:11
  of the car or control yourself. Why I said no, just chill out
• 57:21
  you can't be that horny all the time.
• 57:23
  Not blaming her, but why are you fucking this man after he tried
• 57:27
  to push you into a threesome on a boat that you did not?
• 57:30
  5 minutes ago. Like be.
• 57:31
  For real, I. Fucking had a knee.
• 57:34
  For real. Honestly though, this part of
• 57:36
  the book got me confused, got me shook up because why are we now
• 57:41
  supposed to think Army's in the lead?
• 57:44
  She was like, oh, I'm just seeing such a future with.
• 57:46
  Army Army's 20. 8 he's 28 but you know what he had the most
• 57:52
  willies about her being younger than anyone, even Macon who's
• 57:59
  older This man calling her baby in .5 in a second and yeah I'm.
• 58:03
  Pretty sure also they were fighting because Megan was like
• 58:06
  she's not going to replace your fucking kids mum and then he
• 58:10
  tried to like essentially wipe her up on the spot.
• 58:12
  But she does because she's a St. and they're all the same.
• 58:16
  Duh. Because anytime they mention any
• 58:19
  previous woman that was one of the Saints, they're
• 58:22
  interchangeable, you know what I mean?
• 58:24
  They're like, Oh well, that St. chick fucking pissed me off and
• 58:28
  therefore I'm going to punch Christian in the face next time
• 58:30
  I see her. That's how the system works.
• 58:33
  Horrible. I thought Dallas was the
• 58:36
  ultimate problem until Army's section came up and I was like.
• 58:41
  This man was clingy and she didn't even like him one time
• 58:45
  feels Oh no they fuck multiple times because doesn't she stay
• 58:48
  in his room like all night after that too?
• 58:51
  Like they go home from the cop car and it just continues.
• 58:53
  Fucking she catches the feels for whatever reason.
• 58:56
  She honestly she is the most 18 year old girl she could ever be.
• 59:01
  But even she admits to Clay and therefore live at some points
• 59:05
  that this is what's going on and no one says anything.
• 59:10
  No, like even if you live, even if you're trying to be sex
• 59:14
  positive or whatever the fuck are non judgmental.
• 59:17
  What the fuck? Well, like, that's still your
• 59:20
  brothers. To be fair to live, she's grown
• 59:22
  up in this house and she's used to them all sleeping with the
• 59:25
  same girl because Aracelli slept with two of them.
• 59:29
  All three of them. What's?
• 59:30
  Even more fucked up is Araceli didn't get picked by the whole
• 59:33
  group and she was salty about it.
• 59:35
  Yeah, it's even worse. Yeah, honestly, that's even more
• 59:38
  embarrassing. After all of this is when they
• 59:41
  go on the little buggy thing and she gets bashed.
• 59:44
  I don't even remember what that's.
• 59:46
  Like it was like a random side plot.
• 59:48
  I think it was to introduce Callum.
• 59:51
  I can't even remember honestly. I'm like, OK, so the trope is
• 59:55
  that gay men hate women. Like, are we leaning into that?
• 1:00:00
  Yes, by men hate women. Because I feel because he was
• 1:00:03
  bisexual, yes, Yeah. But it's like, it's OK that he's
• 1:00:07
  so outwardly vicious and horrible emotional abuse to her
• 1:00:12
  because he doesn't want to stick it in her because that tracks.
• 1:00:14
  Because he's bisexual. Also, why are we talking about
• 1:00:17
  Callum Mandela's further in the book?
• 1:00:19
  At the end it says that Callums dad has another kid right?
• 1:00:25
  He's also slept with their mum. The first thing I thought was,
• 1:00:29
  is Dallas the other kid and he's just been fucking his brother.
• 1:00:32
  Like half brother. Yes the entire time, but make
• 1:00:36
  him the only one with brown eyes.
• 1:00:37
  So I'm assuming it's probably just make them no, but I
• 1:00:40
  spiraled for the entire this. Is why I'm glad I don't look
• 1:00:44
  into things too much talking about the law.
• 1:00:47
  Can we just mention how Chris, Jen, like sometimes just
• 1:00:50
  wandering through the house just starts bawling thinking about
• 1:00:53
  Trista? Stop.
• 1:00:55
  Stop. It.
• 1:00:56
  You have a whole. Ass mother who you fucking hate
• 1:00:59
  and you're crying for this random lady who killed herself.
• 1:01:03
  Not even with the killing herself.
• 1:01:04
  She was a trash mother. But she's like turned her into a
• 1:01:08
  weird St. Yeah.
• 1:01:10
  Of this household, No. She.
• 1:01:12
  Ohh she had some weird thing with their house through 'cause
• 1:01:15
  remember the reason army fell in love with her was because she's
• 1:01:18
  like the little fucking divot in the step the like shutters with
• 1:01:23
  the. Character.
• 1:01:25
  It did. The couch smells like shitty.
• 1:01:27
  The heck house looks like kids that run up and down the stairs.
• 1:01:32
  She's like it has character. Just, and both of them were
• 1:01:35
  like, well we've never thought about your house.
• 1:01:37
  Is mould ridden beefing real? Falling apart and they're like,
• 1:01:43
  oh, she really cares about us. She's really slumming it up in
• 1:01:47
  here. It's like.
• 1:01:51
  Guys. She's responsible for half the
• 1:01:53
  moulds. She.
• 1:01:54
  Said honestly, you. Supposed to move into her house.
• 1:01:57
  No one said who. Cares.
• 1:01:59
  She's living in this big ass house.
• 1:02:01
  Someone's paying the bills. Can we talk about how she's the
• 1:02:05
  only one who notices that Macon's more cranky looks
• 1:02:08
  unhealthy? He's not eating I.
• 1:02:10
  Thought the man was dying of cancer and then we're out here,
• 1:02:14
  he's got depression. What I thought, oh, the twist is
• 1:02:18
  going to be he's got cancer and that's why he's writing a new
• 1:02:21
  will and everything. Yeah, the man.
• 1:02:22
  Just needs to go to therapy. Yeah, but does he go?
• 1:02:25
  No, Why would he go? Why would he go?
• 1:02:29
  And he's got an 18 year old woman in that house.
• 1:02:31
  Nothing cures depression more on a 31 year old man than an 18
• 1:02:35
  year old pussy. I just oh.
• 1:02:41
  No, only that after all of this, of trying to help this man, she
• 1:02:47
  goes, I see you when my eyes are closed.
• 1:02:50
  I see you. You take care of them.
• 1:02:52
  I'm going to take care of you. He's 30, bitch.
• 1:02:55
  He's got, what, five other siblings?
• 1:02:57
  Yeah. Tell one of them.
• 1:02:59
  Literally. Tell all of them, sit down in a
• 1:03:01
  circle. We're doing an intervention.
• 1:03:03
  He's depressed. But like why is everyone else
• 1:03:05
  allowed to live their life but her who isn't even in the
• 1:03:07
  family? Well, she tells Dallas, and
• 1:03:09
  Dallas is like, oh, I don't see it.
• 1:03:11
  And then he goes, oh, he is. Oh.
• 1:03:16
  But yeah, she's like, I take care of you.
• 1:03:18
  End of story. And then?
• 1:03:20
  You're still a child. So not only does she take full
• 1:03:26
  responsibility for this grown man.
• 1:03:28
  And his depression. In the background while she's
• 1:03:31
  thinking, ha ha, I'm infiltrating my way to the top
• 1:03:34
  and they're going to worship me. They're all like, hey, it'd be a
• 1:03:37
  really good idea if we all fucked her and you emotionally
• 1:03:42
  manipulated her into getting her family to like buy the land.
• 1:03:46
  Exactly so. This was what they.
• 1:03:48
  Wanted. Her to do so not only are they.
• 1:03:50
  Using her for the pussy that she not only is.
• 1:03:53
  This on camera Dallas is like they're like and then she
• 1:03:57
  doesn't really agree and they just go to do it.
• 1:04:00
  Army, who are you? Even.
• 1:04:02
  Surprised when they bring it up to.
• 1:04:04
  Her face. But the only one that is shocked
• 1:04:06
  is Trace. He's the only one that's like,
• 1:04:08
  maybe you shouldn't Maybe. We don't do.
• 1:04:10
  That, but Army's like, yeah, I'll have the camera.
• 1:04:13
  Yeah, they're like, duh, she's about to go down on her and
• 1:04:16
  Army's like, yeah, I've got it. How do we bring this up?
• 1:04:19
  Anyway, make him of course, apparently he has no time and
• 1:04:22
  all the time to watch her on cameras because he has some guy
• 1:04:26
  that was following her. He's like she's going home,
• 1:04:29
  bring her home. I've had enough.
• 1:04:30
  He's sitting there and he's like, if I wanted to sell you, I
• 1:04:33
  fucking could because we have the footage of you fucking him
• 1:04:36
  in the back of the car. She's like they all look up at
• 1:04:39
  the camera right before this happens and she goes obviously
• 1:04:43
  make him doesn't want it to happen, so we're not going to do
• 1:04:45
  it. You shouldn't want it to happen
• 1:04:47
  such. A leap?
• 1:04:49
  She takes the. Biggest leaps for this man.
• 1:04:51
  For what reason? Oh.
• 1:04:52
  My God also. He's like, we've got the footage
• 1:04:55
  ready, we don't need it at. This point she already knows
• 1:04:58
  that there is a possibility that make him had to literally get
• 1:05:03
  paid to have sex with everyone. Why would he want you to do
• 1:05:06
  that? This man is depressed, you know
• 1:05:08
  he's. Depressed, it's not OK for him
• 1:05:10
  to manhore himself when realistically he could have got
• 1:05:14
  a DoorDash job. OK, he could have.
• 1:05:17
  The times he. Could have done a fucking horn
• 1:05:20
  hand job. Uber Eats side hustle.
• 1:05:23
  Yeah, worked at the McDonald's. He doesn't wanna do that.
• 1:05:27
  Well, he was already lawn caring, that's why.
• 1:05:29
  Exactly, ramp it up a bit bro, become a handy man.
• 1:05:33
  No one told you to go whore your man meat out and we're supposed
• 1:05:37
  to feel sorry for him? No, but OK, say we're not
• 1:05:41
  supposed to feel sorry for him, but she is supposed to feel
• 1:05:43
  sorry for him and she's just like I'm gonna whore out my body
• 1:05:46
  too. He.
• 1:05:47
  He was a great man at the point it's.
• 1:05:50
  Just land I. Know.
• 1:05:52
  At the end of the day, move house, move town.
• 1:05:54
  No one cares that much. Macon at some point is having a
• 1:05:59
  full sob story breaking down about how he had to whore out
• 1:06:04
  his man meat for old ladies. Right?
• 1:06:09
  And we're like but that we had to feel so bad for him but he's
• 1:06:13
  practically pushing 40 and he's just like he thinks it's okay to
• 1:06:17
  have non consensual sex with barely legals.
• 1:06:20
  Yeah. So that's morally fine.
• 1:06:23
  But Oh no, the old rich ladies dazzled me.
• 1:06:26
  Like threw diamonds on me. I'm like fucking hunch them.
• 1:06:30
  To be. Fair.
• 1:06:31
  To be fair, they were wild ladies because I think I
• 1:06:33
  remember in there he said one wanted to pretend I was her son.
• 1:06:37
  One would hit him and then I forgot what the other one did.
• 1:06:40
  He. Even says it himself.
• 1:06:42
  People do sex work and it's like, so you.
• 1:06:45
  Did sex work? So don't do it again.
• 1:06:48
  Don't like that is your choice my guy.
• 1:06:50
  Like why are you acting like the biggest victim in the world?
• 1:06:54
  Also her blaming army for it. She's like you walked off and
• 1:06:57
  left him in that house. Oh.
• 1:06:58
  No. Oh no.
• 1:07:00
  It's not like he was a 20 plus something year old man that
• 1:07:03
  could leave. And like, he's the one who
• 1:07:06
  collected the money. You got paid for it.
• 1:07:09
  You didn't get ripped. Off.
• 1:07:11
  She's doing this shit for free and you expect her to do it for
• 1:07:14
  free? That's what's even worse.
• 1:07:17
  If you want her to be doing sex work in your family home, at
• 1:07:20
  least pay the bitch. He's expecting her to do it for
• 1:07:25
  free. He is paying her for her other
• 1:07:28
  job. Barely.
• 1:07:31
  Oh my God, this. This means somehow offended
• 1:07:34
  she's sleeping with anyone, but then uses it against her at any
• 1:07:38
  time. He gets 100%.
• 1:07:40
  I don't know if they're actually fucking at this point, but
• 1:07:42
  they're doing foreplay. His phone's ringing wild.
• 1:07:46
  His phone's ringing. He'd only.
• 1:07:48
  Stuck the Dick in and did a couple thrust.
• 1:07:50
  He did a tip and she was thrashing on the bed.
• 1:07:53
  She's like, I need to be pounded immediately.
• 1:07:56
  She's like, don't pick up the phone, don't kill Trace for
• 1:07:59
  ringing you anyway, Megan screaming like God damn this
• 1:08:03
  kid, like Trace isn't older than the girl he's fucking.
• 1:08:06
  Anyway, he's on the phone. He finally answers.
• 1:08:09
  She's decided to dangle her head off the edge of the bed and he's
• 1:08:12
  fucking her face. And of course, Penelope Douglas
• 1:08:15
  loves nothing more than to dangle incest in our face.
• 1:08:19
  She's like, we're going to get close enough, but not too close.
• 1:08:24
  So this man is moaning in his brother's ear.
• 1:08:27
  And it wasn't even a conversation that needed to
• 1:08:29
  happen. No, he's like, the treasure's
• 1:08:31
  not even in the graveyard. Then hang up bitch.
• 1:08:33
  Hang up bitch and Trace is like fuck you.
• 1:08:36
  Slice No I. Just need to put it in non
• 1:08:42
  contact situations. Trace.
• 1:08:45
  Is like on the he's moaning. He's like, fuck yes.
• 1:08:47
  Trace is on the phone like, OK, like you're busy, we'll deal
• 1:08:53
  with, it's fine. It's you're busy.
• 1:08:55
  They're still going and going. And then they're like something
• 1:08:58
  blows up in the background because you know, they finally
• 1:09:02
  can't have sex. You finally can't know it's him.
• 1:09:05
  I'm like at this point. And like, I don't know, they
• 1:09:08
  chase up whatever the fuck. They chase up whatever the fuck
• 1:09:10
  this is where they have like their weird little break up
• 1:09:14
  because she throws herself into danger with RSLE because no one
• 1:09:18
  listened to her. It's fine.
• 1:09:20
  I also he's not going to let anyone fuck her up.
• 1:09:23
  Like let's be for real. That girl has saved her multiple
• 1:09:25
  times. She leaves, she goes home, she's
• 1:09:28
  crying. She's like, yeah, I need.
• 1:09:30
  Make them to be softer. With me, he's too mean.
• 1:09:33
  Trace is like, you need to be more kind to her.
• 1:09:35
  She's like fucking feeding us, cleaning our house.
• 1:09:39
  I think she's cleaned their house at this point because
• 1:09:40
  remember there was a big scrub down at the house scene.
• 1:09:43
  She's cleaning out the expired food in the fridge and stuff
• 1:09:46
  like. Are they covered?
• 1:09:47
  She lifted all the furniture and took their rug outside.
• 1:09:50
  Why are you? Even in this House right now.
• 1:09:52
  Go to your home. Fuck me anyway so.
• 1:09:55
  Embarrassing. That she goes to her home.
• 1:09:58
  He puts on a suit. A crusty, dusty suit.
• 1:10:01
  He goes to her house and he's like, let me in, Christian, let
• 1:10:05
  me in. So he just kicks down the door.
• 1:10:07
  And then then just having this weird heart to heart.
• 1:10:11
  He's pretty much saying he wants to go riding Harley's in Hawaii
• 1:10:14
  with her until the end of time. I'm like, that is so gay.
• 1:10:18
  Like the way the way. That he was talking about his
• 1:10:21
  future with her. I'm like, are you OK?
• 1:10:23
  Like, is this the plot of some weird musical?
• 1:10:27
  It's like, stop, you did not come up with this theatrical
• 1:10:31
  future. Stop it.
• 1:10:32
  Not only is he doing this, he tells her he's like, I felt a
• 1:10:36
  don't hit my heart and I know you felt it too.
• 1:10:39
  Stop. Maybe that was the cocaine.
• 1:10:43
  My God, I don't know, Like what's?
• 1:10:45
  Called that cocaine pussy. Like, Oh no.
• 1:10:49
  Anyway. Suddenly pretending like he's
• 1:10:51
  got the feels. What?
• 1:10:53
  And then this is this is finally where she finds out it was him.
• 1:10:56
  He's like having a little giggle about her not knowing because he
• 1:10:59
  just assumed she knew the whole time.
• 1:11:01
  And he's like, I'm the only one who does it Raw, babe.
• 1:11:04
  He's like she's unknown. She's sitting there like, yeah,
• 1:11:07
  I stealthed you. She's.
• 1:11:09
  Full of confidence, like it's she's like it's Trace's kid and
• 1:11:13
  he's like, God, he's had the. Snip.
• 1:11:15
  She she said, full throated that it was Trace's child who at 18,
• 1:11:22
  gets a vasectomy. Let's be for fucking real.
• 1:11:25
  A man that knows what he wants and.
• 1:11:26
  Honestly like they can go get like a numbing needle and
• 1:11:30
  everything but women don't get it for an IUD or anything.
• 1:11:33
  No, they're just shoving shit up the cruder.
• 1:11:36
  But they. Can.
• 1:11:36
  Go surprise to a day procedure and go get a vasectomy.
• 1:11:40
  Avasectomy. I'm sure it's free as well, but
• 1:11:43
  anyway. Anyway, they're.
• 1:11:45
  So he's teasing that there might be a bun in the oven.
• 1:11:47
  She's like, Oh my God, I didn't consider that I was fucking all
• 1:11:50
  the uncles at the exact time that I could be.
• 1:11:52
  Pregnant. And then he's like, are you
• 1:11:55
  pregnant? She's like no, no, I'm not
• 1:11:56
  pregnant. And he's like, it could only be
• 1:11:58
  me, girl. I'm the only one.
• 1:12:00
  Girl, it is I. It is I and she's like, you
• 1:12:02
  didn't even finish in me. I'm he's like, I'm the only one
• 1:12:06
  that drinks bourbon in the house.
• 1:12:09
  The alligator was witness. Honestly, it could have been the
• 1:12:12
  mailman. Fuck.
• 1:12:14
  Me it. Could have been anyone.
• 1:12:16
  It could have been Araceli at this point, at this.
• 1:12:18
  Point. It could have been the security
• 1:12:20
  guard, I don't know. Like it could have been anyone.
• 1:12:23
  Anyone. Anyway, so instead of being
• 1:12:26
  normal human beings and dealing with the security, they decide
• 1:12:29
  to go fuck under the stairs. Well, the security of searching
• 1:12:33
  their house and. Come on.
• 1:12:34
  Let's do a better job security. Like I know you guys get called
• 1:12:37
  out to the big jobs all the time.
• 1:12:39
  Come on now. Let's be for real, this girl has
• 1:12:41
  a thing for voyeurism. All the time.
• 1:12:43
  All the time she's in. Security guards of cops.
• 1:12:46
  And someone was watching her with iron, Trace was watching
• 1:12:49
  her with iron, and so was Macomb.
• 1:12:52
  We're finally thinking, oh great, now we've at least got an
• 1:12:55
  end game. The book surely is wrapping up
• 1:12:57
  they're. Fucking all night.
• 1:12:59
  They've been fucking in her childhood bedroom all night.
• 1:13:02
  He's horrified about the plushies on her bed.
• 1:13:05
  He's like, these are not coming back to my house.
• 1:13:08
  Imagine having sex with someone all night and just being like,
• 1:13:11
  look, you got to move in. Like she hasn't already.
• 1:13:14
  I know what the. Fuck.
• 1:13:17
  I don't know if you remember, she brushed her teeth and just
• 1:13:19
  put her toothbrush in their bathroom.
• 1:13:21
  She's moved in babe, she just keeps jumping to different rooms
• 1:13:25
  every night. You just haven't noticed.
• 1:13:28
  OK, Can we go to the part where, yay, they're now like in some
• 1:13:31
  weird established kind of, oh, we're going to make something
• 1:13:34
  out of this, right? We already went through the
• 1:13:37
  breakup. Yeah, but they're sort of like
• 1:13:39
  they're reunited. Yeah.
• 1:13:41
  Yeah. But then the next plot twist is
• 1:13:45
  her finding out that one of the older women that he was pushed
• 1:13:50
  into whoring himself out for was in fact her biological mother.
• 1:13:55
  Yes. I think her name is Carly some
• 1:13:57
  shit. Imagine what the.
• 1:13:59
  Fuck. Imagine being offended that this
• 1:14:03
  man has slept with multiple family members.
• 1:14:06
  Well, you. Exactly bitch.
• 1:14:10
  Pot meat, kettle babies. Not only does the mum bust in
• 1:14:14
  and she's like, oh you don't get to fuck her, you.
• 1:14:17
  Can't take her away from us. She's moved out.
• 1:14:20
  Girl. He's.
• 1:14:21
  Just like. He's like buttoning up his
• 1:14:25
  buttons and he's like, look, you need to shut the fuck up.
• 1:14:28
  And not only does he just fuck off, like acting like the most
• 1:14:32
  guilty party ever. He's so offended.
• 1:14:35
  And then she makes up excuses for him immediately, and it's
• 1:14:38
  like it couldn't have been for avenge, but it must have been.
• 1:14:42
  He didn't tell me. He could have told me that it
• 1:14:44
  was. My girl that.
• 1:14:45
  I would have understood. But they're the worst people
• 1:14:48
  because she's spiraling. He doesn't say anything.
• 1:14:50
  And he's like, go fuck. He literally leaves and he's
• 1:14:53
  like, Dallas is up, then fuck you, slut.
• 1:14:55
  Fuck you, slut. Dallas is up.
• 1:14:57
  Yeah. He's like, she's horrified that
• 1:15:01
  this has happened. She's crying on the floor,
• 1:15:04
  cuddling her Taco plushy, literally.
• 1:15:06
  And he's like fuck you. Her world is just upside down.
• 1:15:09
  There's not going to be Harley's in Hawaii, babe.
• 1:15:12
  He's like, this has been a trick.
• 1:15:15
  Poof and I'm gone. But just.
• 1:15:18
  When? He left.
• 1:15:19
  Angrily. And he was going to tag in the
• 1:15:22
  most vicious one, Dallas, Dallas.
• 1:15:26
  Dallas nuked her whole family. Batman.
• 1:15:28
  On a sociopath, On some sort of level.
• 1:15:31
  Yeah. His chapters were.
• 1:15:33
  Weird, he was the one. You know how this is just like
• 1:15:35
  Den of Vipers? Yeah, he's the fucked up one
• 1:15:38
  from Den of Vipers. Forget his name.
• 1:15:42
  Knife in the asshole. No, that one wasn't even the
• 1:15:48
  fucked up 1. That was the fucked up one.
• 1:15:50
  OK, yeah, he was fucking her with the knife handle in her
• 1:15:54
  ass. I thought the one that was the
• 1:15:55
  worst was the one that like, strangled her.
• 1:15:57
  That was the same one. Oh well, there you go, that's
• 1:15:59
  why I'm confusing them. Won't catch me reading that one
• 1:16:03
  for 1/3 time. So anyway he doesn't even
• 1:16:05
  explain himself. He's like anyway, poos mic drop,
• 1:16:09
  leave, peace bitch. I'm out.
• 1:16:11
  And then like totally kind of unrelated because it wasn't even
• 1:16:15
  for that reason he's suddenly spiralling and being fully
• 1:16:18
  suicidal bitch. And it wasn't even about
• 1:16:21
  Christian or how he treated her. It was literally like.
• 1:16:25
  I got too many things I've. Yeah, like, Oh my God, my whole
• 1:16:28
  life. And then Iron called him at the
• 1:16:30
  exact moment he was feeling suicidal, which is kind of
• 1:16:33
  hilarious. Iron's.
• 1:16:34
  Because that never happens in real life.
• 1:16:36
  No, it's so stupid. And this is when Irons decided
• 1:16:39
  that he wants to be your pilot. He's he's going to make it his
• 1:16:42
  dream. And then Macon's like, well if
• 1:16:45
  this dumb shit, I can do anything for himself, I'm just
• 1:16:49
  magically going to turn my whole life around.
• 1:16:52
  I'm going to make Aracelli my personal assistant, I'm going to
• 1:16:55
  load all the mental labour in the world onto Aracelli and I'm
• 1:16:58
  going to be pissed off if she doesn't get a block party
• 1:17:01
  starting in 5 minutes. He's like continuing the
• 1:17:03
  renovations. He's like add a couple of extra
• 1:17:05
  rooms. We're going to have more people
• 1:17:07
  here eventually. But like, where did this come
• 1:17:09
  from? He was about to shoot himself in
• 1:17:11
  the fucking. Head. 2 seconds ago.
• 1:17:14
  But then he goes, I'm going to do it for Trista.
• 1:17:16
  She was able to survive one more day and I'm like so are you
• 1:17:20
  going to kill yourself tomorrow? Because that's what I thought I
• 1:17:24
  was like. Wait, no, because they did line
• 1:17:28
  it up. She did line it up that way.
• 1:17:29
  She, I know Penelope, was like, not Penelope.
• 1:17:33
  Marcella or whatever. Yes, that bitch, she was like, I
• 1:17:37
  remember the day your mum died. She was so happy for the week
• 1:17:40
  before and then she just. I know like so Macon's going to
• 1:17:43
  kill himself the next day and it has nothing to do with Christian
• 1:17:47
  and how bad he just betrayed. Her.
• 1:17:49
  I was like, great, he's happy and getting his shit sorted.
• 1:17:52
  I was like what a time. He didn't feel bad a single
• 1:17:56
  second about what he just did to Christian.
• 1:17:57
  And I'm like. At that point, literally all
• 1:18:00
  they had to do was Flood being like, we'll talk about it later.
• 1:18:02
  I was like, I'm going to go anyway.
• 1:18:04
  She kicks her mum out of the house.
• 1:18:06
  She's like get the fuck out of here. 5 seconds ago she goes my
• 1:18:09
  mom is not that bad she makes a mean Margarita and she's like.
• 1:18:12
  Get out bitch, you fucking shit. So do we like her or do we not?
• 1:18:17
  Like what do you want from her? You wanted to watch the kids and
• 1:18:19
  also out of the house. It was just giving more the
• 1:18:25
  like, how's everyone else allowed to spiral but your
• 1:18:28
  mother, but also let us spiral the mum's fault and you don't
• 1:18:32
  ask dad for a single thing. See, here's the thing, we
• 1:18:34
  usually have dead mothers. So I'm like this is the next
• 1:18:38
  one. But it's either dead mum or
• 1:18:41
  totally horrible female mum, yes, so.
• 1:18:44
  Yep. And Dad doesn't get any Flack.
• 1:18:48
  Dad makes no fucking sense because we immediately spiral
• 1:18:51
  into the next bit where she's selling herself off to Jerome in
• 1:18:54
  front of her dad. This man's so stupid.
• 1:18:57
  She's like, I'm taking the kids with me, I'm moving into your
• 1:19:00
  house and her dad's like, where's your mother?
• 1:19:03
  Shouldn't you know that? He knows nothing.
• 1:19:05
  He knows nothing. You care nothing.
• 1:19:07
  It's like. He's acting brand new like he
• 1:19:10
  has no idea he's like 10. Chapters.
• 1:19:13
  Behind her. Dad just leaves her in there.
• 1:19:17
  So all of the all of them are in there.
• 1:19:19
  They're doing some weird negotiating.
• 1:19:22
  Then she comes in and like she's literally selling herself to
• 1:19:26
  these two random guys and Dad's just like, oh, I'll let you
• 1:19:30
  deal, I'm out of here. Yeah.
• 1:19:31
  How can't you stay for your 18 year old daughter you fuck fuck.
• 1:19:34
  Me. And also she wouldn't have to do
• 1:19:37
  that if you paid her. But you're not even getting
• 1:19:40
  anything on paper. You're just telling them to
• 1:19:42
  pretty much verbally agree that you're gonna leave the Bay for
• 1:19:45
  five years, you know, leave it alone.
• 1:19:49
  And then when Macon finds out about it, he's like, this slut
• 1:19:52
  isn't gonna do any favours for me 'cause my male ego can't
• 1:19:55
  handle it. And then wasn't Aracelli going?
• 1:19:58
  She's doing something good for. Us just like let her do.
• 1:20:01
  It it was Clayton, it was Clayton.
• 1:20:02
  Clayton was like dude, she's literally selling herself.
• 1:20:06
  Sacrificing herself for you for you bitch.
• 1:20:10
  And he he literally says and this is iconic.
• 1:20:13
  Your body is not yours. Just selling.
• 1:20:16
  Honestly, you're. A body mind choice bitch.
• 1:20:19
  OK, honestly. Honestly, we're not reading that
• 1:20:22
  one. He can't.
• 1:20:23
  Eat with that. This man, so you know how it's
• 1:20:26
  like it slaps with the daddy. I'm Yeah, he's playing daddy
• 1:20:32
  with my kid. Yeah.
• 1:20:33
  When she's like, he's hugging her on the tree, right?
• 1:20:35
  And she's like saying goodbye. He goes, I would father all of
• 1:20:39
  your children summon me anytime you want. 1 And I was like, OK,
• 1:20:43
  Daddy, summon him every time she wants.
• 1:20:47
  Yeah, he's like, you can have only children with me, but I'm
• 1:20:49
  going to let you do you. I'm like where?
• 1:20:52
  Is. This man, where was that man?
• 1:20:55
  This entire book? Because I would have.
• 1:20:57
  For some unknown reason I was gobbling them bits up, but they
• 1:21:00
  were very limited. It was like 5 times.
• 1:21:03
  And that's not even his personality because he's
• 1:21:05
  smothering as fuck. He's not.
• 1:21:07
  Going to let you just summon him every five years or so.
• 1:21:11
  What? Is this Pirates of the Caribbean
• 1:21:13
  when fucking Will Turner was turned into Daley Jones and he
• 1:21:15
  can only get on to land forever? Exactly what?
• 1:21:19
  But yeah, not your body to sell after she's.
• 1:21:21
  Already solder He really doubled down on hashtag your body my
• 1:21:25
  shoes. I just honestly slapped slapped
• 1:21:30
  in the worst way I could feel the feminism just leave my every
• 1:21:34
  cell of my body because honestly those words just hard reset.
• 1:21:40
  In a bad way or in a bad way here I'm like.
• 1:21:44
  Damn, it's almost like someone turned off gravity and I don't
• 1:21:47
  know what's going. On like you were offended.
• 1:21:49
  No, like it's just nothing even mattered at the.
• 1:21:51
  Point. The amount of gobbledygook in
• 1:21:53
  this book. I was like.
• 1:21:56
  And this was a bits was that was like saving it for me.
• 1:21:59
  What? Yeah.
• 1:22:00
  No, I was orbiting. I love.
• 1:22:03
  See, my favorite type of books are like possessive fantasy
• 1:22:05
  books. So I'm like this.
• 1:22:07
  But even after that, she's like, how much did you buy me for?
• 1:22:10
  And he's like enough to knock you up.
• 1:22:12
  I want a kid and I want it to be yours.
• 1:22:14
  Meanwhile, instead of being like a normal person, she starts
• 1:22:17
  stripping in front of all of them and he's like, get the fuck
• 1:22:20
  out everyone. They're like, they're shocked.
• 1:22:23
  But like why was he shocked? This man?
• 1:22:25
  He didn't even fix up the mom situation yet.
• 1:22:34
  I'm like. It must have been the I feel
• 1:22:37
  like she had better sex with Army and Iron than she did with
• 1:22:40
  anyone else. Facts, but yeah.
• 1:22:44
  Honestly, Megan strapped her up to an industrial vacuum.
• 1:22:47
  Like what? How can you compete with that?
• 1:22:54
  But OK, I don't understand. It always has to come to like
• 1:22:57
  man business, right? Because it was him versus Jerome
• 1:23:01
  Bing Bing. And they were like perfectly
• 1:23:07
  lined up. How it was like, I'm not going
• 1:23:10
  to let him piss all over my wall.
• 1:23:14
  You can't tell. Me.
• 1:23:16
  You cannot tell me Macon wanted her back.
• 1:23:19
  She's probably on the verge of turning 19.
• 1:23:22
  Yeah, you can't tell me that he actually wanted her for real.
• 1:23:25
  For real. He just wanted to take her from
• 1:23:27
  Jerome Geronimo over here. I don't know.
• 1:23:30
  So then it's like. Oh my God.
• 1:23:32
  The epilogue after this. Never follow up with the group
• 1:23:35
  yard. Situation.
• 1:23:37
  No. Who?
• 1:23:37
  I don't even know what the treasure is.
• 1:23:39
  What is the treasure? Who cares?
• 1:23:40
  Who cares? Why is there always random
• 1:23:42
  treasure in these books? Ohh but also conveniently
• 1:23:46
  towards the end, Chris, Jen is just able to pay her way out of
• 1:23:50
  it because she found out Daddy was corrupt.
• 1:23:52
  Yeah, and it's like, so she could have done all this anyway.
• 1:23:55
  She could have started her own Hooters.
• 1:23:56
  She could have maintained the mansion for herself and the
• 1:23:59
  singles. But not only that, Macon's like,
• 1:24:02
  oh, even if you don't want me back, oh, I've got custody of
• 1:24:06
  your fucking younger siblings somehow.
• 1:24:08
  I yeah, I forgot about that. Cleared it on the phone.
• 1:24:11
  He. Paid his mom.
• 1:24:13
  OK, she's a terrible woman. Because you're just gonna let
• 1:24:16
  your kids go live in the swamp in this mouldy.
• 1:24:19
  Like no one knows he has money. That's the whole point of that
• 1:24:22
  family. Exactly.
• 1:24:23
  No one knows they have money. They think they're struggling to
• 1:24:25
  get by. Their house is fucking
• 1:24:27
  dilapidated. It's a random 31 year old single
• 1:24:29
  man. To your knowledge, yes.
• 1:24:31
  Potentially fucking your daughter, yes.
• 1:24:33
  And you're gonna think instead of giving custody to your
• 1:24:36
  daughter, who at least you know has the basics of caring about
• 1:24:41
  them going to school, you're gonna sell the kids to him who
• 1:24:45
  could be running some underground paedophile ring.
• 1:24:47
  And you know what else? You know what?
• 1:24:48
  This woman is just lucky enough he does put their interest
• 1:24:51
  first. But he's only doing it to
• 1:24:53
  emotionally manipulate, oh, just being with him.
• 1:24:56
  He's like, oh guess what, your siblings are already moving in
• 1:24:59
  so you may as well date me. Yeah, he's like, I already got a
• 1:25:02
  room lined up for. It's fine.
• 1:25:03
  Mm hmm. So even if she.
• 1:25:05
  Was pissed about the mum thing. She has no room to actually care
• 1:25:08
  because she's kind of gotta move in.
• 1:25:09
  Yeah. Coercion.
• 1:25:11
  Yeah. She moves in, she just decides,
• 1:25:14
  that's all it. So the epilogue is 4 years
• 1:25:16
  later. Yes, so she's 22, he's what, 35?
• 1:25:21
  He's off in the middle of nowhere.
• 1:25:22
  She's stressing. She's like, I haven't heard from
• 1:25:24
  him for days. Why in four years have they
• 1:25:28
  decided to start doing ship eyes to get black market lumber and
• 1:25:31
  nails? Because they're pirates.
• 1:25:34
  Treasure Davy Jones concept. She's always summoned me when
• 1:25:38
  you need sperm like it's all adding up and.
• 1:25:40
  Somehow all she does is write illegal shit that teenagers are
• 1:25:44
  doing it somehow. But she doesn't tell you how
• 1:25:46
  they got to that point. No, but yeah.
• 1:25:48
  And then? But he had to whore himself out
• 1:25:50
  instead of thinking about doing something like this.
• 1:25:53
  What? He was building up, you know,
• 1:25:55
  building up his game and then he's built up the house.
• 1:25:59
  He's rich, he's built up the entire house.
• 1:26:01
  It's huge. He built a whole extra 5 rooms,
• 1:26:04
  right? But somehow her younger brother
• 1:26:08
  went in the attic and then her sister went into another bedroom
• 1:26:11
  with a balcony. So they've just built up this
• 1:26:14
  massive house into a mansion. Not only that, they've taken all
• 1:26:18
  the neighborhood kids for breakfast to make sure they're
• 1:26:21
  eating every day. And then she's like, I finally
• 1:26:24
  want a baby. And what is with men in books?
• 1:26:27
  And they'll be like, I want a baby.
• 1:26:29
  And they're like really horny about it.
• 1:26:31
  No. They always really horny about
• 1:26:34
  it. I hate it.
• 1:26:38
  Wait till you hear about fucking favour and recent.
• 1:26:41
  But anyway, Christian is just a trap wife when you surprise.
• 1:26:46
  This whole thing is just so. Honestly.
• 1:26:49
  Being a trap wife and wanting to mother five men.
• 1:26:52
  Honestly the fact that Penelope dedicated this to her mum,
• 1:26:56
  grandma and stepmom is very telling and I feel for every
• 1:26:59
  single woman in that family tree.
• 1:27:01
  Like I'm so I don't know. Someone needs help there?
• 1:27:06
  You know what? It wasn't written great, but it
• 1:27:08
  was somewhat crack like. It was very chaotic.
• 1:27:13
  Roxy from Dena Vipers walked so that Chris Jen could run because
• 1:27:17
  Oh my God, I've never seen a bigger pick me.
• 1:27:20
  Bigger pick me, but somehow arguably better to read is this
• 1:27:24
  one. Yeah.
• 1:27:24
  Dena Vipers is horrible. Yeah, it's fatigue.
• 1:27:27
  Anything sickening the female characters in this book All
• 1:27:30
  terrible only. When I really that was really
• 1:27:32
  good was Rs Ellie. Yeah, but she's a flop because
• 1:27:35
  she couldn't even get them all to fuck her.
• 1:27:37
  That's even more embarrassing. Shame.
• 1:27:39
  Like at that point you're just unhot.
• 1:27:43
  Imagine these losers not fucking you.
• 1:27:45
  They're all. Losers, All of them.
• 1:27:47
  All of. Them.
• 1:27:49
  No, but like all of them are losers.
• 1:27:50
  She just wants Army and she's oh, the worst thing is her
• 1:27:53
  telling her Christian she's been in love with Army since she was
• 1:27:57
  15. If you can't even pull army.
• 1:27:59
  How old is fucking Aracelli? That's what I mean when.
• 1:28:03
  Was that? 15 when he was already a grown
• 1:28:05
  man and she was pining after him.
• 1:28:06
  Yeah, but why would anyone want to fuck these guys?
• 1:28:10
  Just honest to God I don't. They must be hot.
• 1:28:13
  Well, at least describe them better then.
• 1:28:15
  They got no description. Also don't look up the fan art
• 1:28:19
  on TikTok because I literally kicked 1 and it was like AI art
• 1:28:22
  and they all look like toddlers. They did like the first two and
• 1:28:26
  they look like little babies and I was like these are 20 year old
• 1:28:30
  men. That's.
• 1:28:31
  Weird. Yeah.
• 1:28:32
  I don't want to see these people.
• 1:28:34
  I feel like they smell like BR I.
• 1:28:36
  Think I couldn't even picture them, eh?
• 1:28:39
  Honestly, I wanna. Slime.
• 1:28:40
  Macon really just terrible character.
• 1:28:44
  He was the ultimate bad guy. Army comes a close second.
• 1:28:49
  Milo didn't fucking matter, he practically died in like pantry.
• 1:28:53
  I don't know, they beat the shit out of him, Yeah.
• 1:28:56
  That's what I mean. Like he doesn't.
• 1:28:58
  Who's even the bad guy in this? There wasn't a clear, but like
• 1:29:04
  there wasn't a clear bad guy and you need a good bad guy.
• 1:29:07
  Jealous wasn't even a bad guy, he just.
• 1:29:10
  No. He was just something different.
• 1:29:13
  He just wasn't fully heterosexual.
• 1:29:15
  Yeah, he also was jealous. He was pushing her to see her
• 1:29:18
  reaction and she never reacted to anything but the.
• 1:29:21
  Certain characters I didn't need to be in there.
• 1:29:23
  The treasure plot was useless. Yeah, I honestly think she's
• 1:29:28
  setting up a Callum and Dallas book because there's an extra
• 1:29:32
  Dallas chapter in the back about Callum, them having a wank on
• 1:29:37
  the phone and then him fucking a girl.
• 1:29:39
  And then Callum's like, I'm going to come back and ruin your
• 1:29:42
  life. And he's like.
• 1:29:43
  And then I reckon they're going to do Aracelian Army.
• 1:29:47
  Yeah. Who wants to continue in this
• 1:29:49
  world though? Because there's not even proper
• 1:29:51
  rivalry between the Saints and the venom.
• 1:29:56
  Like it's just. I just think I read her shit
• 1:29:58
  because it's so ridiculous. It is, but what?
• 1:30:01
  Like how do you move on from this?
• 1:30:03
  You don't. You don't.
• 1:30:05
  It's just it. Is what it is.
• 1:30:07
  Christians an idiot. Yeah.
• 1:30:09
  Overall, this is going to be a book that's either going to be a
• 1:30:12
  one star or a five star for people.
• 1:30:14
  There is no in between. I.
• 1:30:15
  Wonder if it's the type of reader you are as well, if you
• 1:30:17
  take things so seriously or if you don't as well because.
• 1:30:20
  You can't take this. Serious.
• 1:30:22
  No. Some people do take books
• 1:30:23
  seriously and they're it will be a one star.
• 1:30:26
  Me, I mean you, me as fuck. What should we rate this out of?
• 1:30:32
  Fuck you sluts. Yes.
• 1:30:34
  How many fuck you sluts out of five?
• 1:30:37
  I'm going to go 3 and low key got me out of a reading slump.
• 1:30:40
  I know it's trash but I was entertained.
• 1:30:44
  OK, I'm just for the principal. I just have to give it a one
• 1:30:49
  because I'm not. Surprised, I just.
• 1:30:52
  Things didn't make sense. I don't even care.
• 1:30:55
  Yeah, no. You just got to go along for the
• 1:30:58
  ride. It just didn't stand out from
• 1:31:01
  other books kind of exactly like this.
• 1:31:03
  So I was kind of like, well. They never do.
• 1:31:05
  But at least give me a better reason to fuck each of them.
• 1:31:08
  Yeah, because there wasn't. No, there was not.
• 1:31:10
  It was just. Opportunity and that's mean it.
• 1:31:13
  But if she actually leaned into it and said I'm being a pussy
• 1:31:15
  detective, I would have been actually rooting for her.
• 1:31:18
  If she just said I have to figure out who it is so I'm
• 1:31:22
  going to fuck all of them, then I would have actually been like,
• 1:31:25
  hell yeah, you are, girl. Yeah, but it was like this sad
• 1:31:29
  her getting almost sexually abused every single time kind of
• 1:31:32
  situation. I was like.
• 1:31:33
  There was a point where I thought she wasn't even gonna
• 1:31:35
  pick and she was just gonna marry all 5 'cause I was like.
• 1:31:41
  Honestly though, it sounds. Like she's kind of bleeding the
• 1:31:43
  free bag made for eternity and get nothing out of it.
• 1:31:46
  Mm hmm. So is that it?
• 1:31:48
  That is? All.
• 1:31:50
  I want nothing like you've just closed the iPad.
• 1:31:53
  And you're like. Done.
• 1:31:54
  I'm out of here. I am out of here.
• 1:31:56
  Mouth fucking. Also what was the bit where they
• 1:32:01
  were all squeezing themselves into a clown car for what?
• 1:32:04
  And it was like a timeless. Little buggy terminant thing.
• 1:32:08
  Yeah. Who?
• 1:32:08
  Made-up this game just so that she could dry hump Macon in the
• 1:32:11
  car. I don't.
• 1:32:13
  Penelope Douglas made-up this game.
• 1:32:14
  What was? How did that even?
• 1:32:16
  Stop. How did we get there?
• 1:32:18
  That's what I. Mean the crack is cracking a
• 1:32:21
  book cause no section made sense.
• 1:32:24
  I was like why are all these this?
• 1:32:26
  Wasn't. I think that was the moment
• 1:32:27
  Macon decided that he was not going to let her fuck any other
• 1:32:30
  man. But realistically he was the one
• 1:32:32
  who fucked in the 1st place so he could have made that decision
• 1:32:35
  then if she was so like. Man was too depressed.
• 1:32:38
  As he should be. He was literally drinking
• 1:32:41
  smoothies out of a mug so people wouldn't know he was drinking
• 1:32:43
  smoothies. I.
• 1:32:44
  Don't understand was he going to kill himself or not Literally.
• 1:32:48
  I. Honestly don't know.
• 1:32:51
  I don't. Know.
• 1:32:52
  I don't know, girl. OK, let's write.
• 1:32:55
  Who knows? We're done.
• 1:32:58
  Thanks for joining us on Lose the Plot with Carla and Emily.
• 1:33:01
  Don't forget to rate US five stars and subscribe if you
• 1:33:04
  enjoyed slide into our DMS on TikTok or Instagram Lose the
• 1:33:08
  Plot podcast.