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Andy Stanley - Love Dates Heartbreaks Part 6 Getting Over A Broken Heart · Andy Stanley Sermons

0:01
Speaker 1: Today, we're wrapping up the series.
0:03
Speaker 2: We've been in love, dates and heartbreaks, and if you
0:05
Speaker 2: have not been tracking along, you're going to feel like
0:07
Speaker 2: a little bit like you've come in at the end
0:09
Speaker 2: of the movie. So hopefully the end of the movie
0:11
Speaker 2: is intriguing enough for you to go back and watch
0:13
Speaker 2: the beginning of the movie, which is this entire series.
0:16
Speaker 2: So far in this series, we've talked about the two
0:19
Speaker 2: relationship myths that drives so much of our thinking about relationships.
0:22
Speaker 2: The right person myth that if I meet the right person,
0:24
Speaker 2: everything's going to turn on all right.
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Speaker 1: That's a myth.
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Speaker 2: The promise myth. A promise and a party is all
0:29
Speaker 2: I need. I just need to have to make a
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Speaker 2: promise that's the vow, and a party that's the reception,
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Speaker 2: and we're good to go.
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Speaker 1: That's a myth.
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Speaker 2: We talked about Jesus' New Command where he said, here
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Speaker 2: is the one thing you need to know about relationships.
0:40
Speaker 2: I'm calling all of my file followers to love as
0:44
Speaker 2: I have loved, Not to love as you've been loved.
0:46
Speaker 2: Not to love as you want to be loved. Not
0:48
Speaker 2: to love as love is communicated and talked about in culture.
0:51
Speaker 2: He said, it's a whole new kind of love, another
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Speaker 2: kind of love. I want you to love one another
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Speaker 2: the way I have loved you. And we've said throughout
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Speaker 2: this series that when a two people come together and
1:01
Speaker 2: decide they're going to love as God through Christ's love them,
1:03
Speaker 2: it changes everything. And then we looked at the fossil
1:07
Speaker 2: Paul's fine print, because he came along and kind of
1:09
Speaker 2: teased out what it looks like practically the loves Jesus
1:12
Speaker 2: loved us. And we said, this fine print isn't the
1:14
Speaker 2: fine print, that's a gotcha fine print. This fine print
1:18
Speaker 2: will make you what that's right. This fine print will
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Speaker 2: make you fine. Then I gave you my five rules
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Speaker 2: of dating, and they were completely mine and made them up.
1:26
Speaker 2: They weren't scientific, no research involved at all, just my
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Speaker 2: five rules of dating. Then last week we talked about
1:31
Speaker 2: groundhog date, how to make sure next time is better
1:35
Speaker 2: than last time, And if you want next time to
1:36
Speaker 2: be better than last time, you're going to have to
1:38
Speaker 2: do something different in the meantime.
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Speaker 1: So kind of caught you up. But if you want
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Speaker 1: to fill in any of the.
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Speaker 2: Blanks that came to mind as I went through that synopsis,
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Speaker 2: real quick, make sure you go back and watch different
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Speaker 2: parts of the series. So today, as we wrap up,
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Speaker 2: I do want to talk about this big word heartbreaks,
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Speaker 2: and I want to tell you upfront what my goal
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Speaker 2: is today because I want to be careful with this.
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Speaker 2: Preachers are notorious for standing off all the rough edges
2:02
Speaker 2: of the realists, you know, of life as it really is,
2:05
Speaker 2: and I don't want to do that, and I don't.
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Speaker 2: My goal is to avoid any kind of empty, you know,
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Speaker 2: patronizing patronizing promises. You're too important than that, you're too
2:14
Speaker 2: smart for that. And if you're in a series of
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Speaker 2: heart if you're in a season of heartbreak right now,
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Speaker 2: I mean you're like, I can't believe we're talking about this.
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Speaker 1: I am.
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Speaker 2: I'm on the front end of it started yesterday or
2:24
Speaker 2: a month too. My heart is just broken. And it
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Speaker 2: may not be broken over a romantic relationship. It may
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Speaker 2: be broken over because something one of your kids did,
2:31
Speaker 2: or or maybe something your parents have done, or or
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Speaker 2: our brother or sister.
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Speaker 1: But your heart is broken.
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Speaker 2: Here's the two things that I want you to leave
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Speaker 2: with today, and I hope I communicate this throughout our
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Speaker 2: time together. Number One, A broken heart doesn't mean that
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Speaker 2: you're broken. A broken heart doesn't mean you're broken. I
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Speaker 2: don't want your broken heart to break you, and I
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Speaker 2: don't want your broken heart to leave you broken. And
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Speaker 2: I don't want your broken heart to break your spirit.
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Speaker 1: And we've all.
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Speaker 2: Seen what happens when that happens to individuals. The second
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Speaker 2: thing I want you to know is simply this, that
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Speaker 2: there is purpose for you even when your dreams can't
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Speaker 2: come true. There are dreams that we hope come true
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Speaker 2: and wish will come true. And then there's certain seasons
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Speaker 2: of life when we realize, uh oh, that dream not
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Speaker 2: only is it not coming true, it can't come true.
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Speaker 2: And I don't want the dreams that can't come true
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Speaker 2: to squeeze the hope and to squeeze the life and
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Speaker 2: to squeeze the sense of purpose out of you. And
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Speaker 2: the thing that makes this whole conversation difficult, and the
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Speaker 2: thing that makes it so personal for us, is this
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Speaker 2: that all of us in our adulthood, right, all of
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Speaker 2: us in our adulthood, with a picture of what we
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Speaker 2: think life's gonna look like, a picture of what we
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Speaker 2: want it to look like. We all inner adulthood with
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Speaker 2: some sort of dreams that may be very specific or general.
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Speaker 2: But we have dreams, we have plans. In fact, most
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Speaker 2: of us, if we're honest, we stepped into adulthood with
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Speaker 2: a schedule right that we're gonna graduate by a certain time,
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Speaker 2: marry by you know, basically between you know, eighteen and
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Speaker 2: twenty five or twenty five.
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Speaker 1: I have a thirty five.
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Speaker 2: You know, you kind of had to range, you know,
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Speaker 2: not too early, not too late, just right, not too hot,
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Speaker 2: not too cold.
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Speaker 1: Remember that three bears anyway?
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Speaker 2: Okay, married by uh, maybe your thing, you know, I
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Speaker 2: want them to start my own business or work for
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Speaker 2: myself by we want to have children by I want
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Speaker 2: to retire by. And this is particularly true in terms
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Speaker 2: of sort of imagining the future when it comes to
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Speaker 2: our relationships, because no one, no one envisions their future alone.
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Speaker 2: Nobody envisions their future alone. You there's somebody else in
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Speaker 2: your picture of the future.
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Speaker 1: That's absolutely natural. It's normal.
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Speaker 2: And as time goes by, some of our dreams do
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Speaker 2: come true, right, and then some of our dreams come
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Speaker 2: true for a while, and then again at some point
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Speaker 2: some of us realize, In fact, I think it to
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Speaker 2: some degree, most of us realize that there are dreams
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Speaker 2: we've always had, our wishes, we've always always.
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Speaker 1: Had that can't come true.
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Speaker 2: And sometimes reasons our dreams can't come true, it's our fault.
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Speaker 2: Sometimes the reasons our dreams can't come true when with
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Speaker 2: a broken heart is because we're partially to blame. But
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Speaker 2: maybe you're the exception, and you might very well be
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Speaker 2: the exception. Maybe you did everything right, maybe you follow
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Speaker 2: the rules, you played by the rules, you lived your
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Speaker 2: life by the book, but romantically speaking, a relationship never materialized.
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Speaker 2: Or maybe things look promising for a while, things promising
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Speaker 2: for a moment or during a different season or during
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Speaker 2: a season, and then just as you thought things were
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Speaker 2: really gonna work out, you got that phone call, or
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Speaker 2: you intercepted that text, or you've found that note, and
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Speaker 2: turns out you were by the book, but he wasn't.
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Speaker 2: You were by the book, but she wasn't, And out
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Speaker 2: of nowhere, out of nowhere, suddenly he wants to be friends,
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Speaker 2: and you're thinking to yourself, well, you are certainly more
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Speaker 2: than a friend last weekend, weren't you. Or she discovers
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Speaker 2: or she decides that she's going to live her life
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Speaker 2: by a different narrative. She's discovered a different narrative that
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Speaker 2: doesn't include you in spite of the vowels. Maybe your
6:01
Speaker 2: second marriage is starting to feel a lot like the
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Speaker 2: first marriage. And maybe when you hear me say that,
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Speaker 2: you think second marriage, are you kidding?
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Speaker 1: I would like to try a first one.
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Speaker 2: In fact, one of the things that drives you crazy
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Speaker 2: is your friends that are getting married a second time
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Speaker 2: and they want you to be happy about it, and
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Speaker 2: you're like, hey, look, you screwed up a first one.
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Speaker 2: I'd like to have an opportunity to screw up a
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Speaker 2: first one before you have an opportunity to screw up
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Speaker 2: a second one.
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Speaker 1: Right, I mean, give me a chance.
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Speaker 2: And you want to be happy, right, But it just
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Speaker 2: hasn't been in the cards for you. And maybe there
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Speaker 2: was the scenes in your life when you thought for
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Speaker 2: sure you were moving that way, and then to make
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Speaker 2: matters worse, at times, it appears that everybody else, everybody
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Speaker 2: else's dreams are coming true. I mean people far less deserving,
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Speaker 2: people who didn't do it right, people who didn't wait
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Speaker 2: and now and this is the insult to injury, right,
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Speaker 2: and now they're living your dream. All of your dreams
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Speaker 2: have come true for them. Here's the thing, and I
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Speaker 2: don't know how to say this any other way. If
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Speaker 2: you're in that season right now, If you're in that
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Speaker 2: season right now, I just want you to hear from me.
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Speaker 2: I am so sorry. And I'm not sorry because I'm
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Speaker 2: up here and you're down there. That's not why i'm sorry.
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Speaker 2: And I'm not sorry because I feel sorry for you.
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Speaker 1: You don't need that.
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Speaker 2: I'm so sorry because it is gut wrenching and it
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Speaker 2: is heartbreaking, and there is no easy way out, and
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Speaker 2: you already know this. There are no emotionally satisfying answers.
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Speaker 2: There's not one single thing I can say that's gonna
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Speaker 2: suddenly take away all the pain of a heartbreak. Because
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Speaker 2: a heartbreak is heartbreaking, and when dreams don't come true,
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Speaker 2: it is natural and it is normal for your heart
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Speaker 2: to be broken.
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Speaker 1: And I just want you to know I'm sorry.
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Speaker 2: Now, if you're a Christian, what I'm about to say next,
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Speaker 2: I'm not saying so that you'll feel better and you'll think, oh,
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Speaker 2: I'm just all happy now. I'm so happy that you
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Speaker 2: said this. But if you're a Christian, there is something
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Speaker 2: you should know, and this essentially frames your heartbreak and
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Speaker 2: frames the dreams that have come true, and the dreams
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Speaker 2: that can't come true, and the dreams that you don't
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Speaker 2: feel like are coming true. If you're a Christian, you
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Speaker 2: should know that the men and the women who brought
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Speaker 2: us the life and teaching of Jesus, the men and
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Speaker 2: the women who delivered to this world the life and
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Speaker 2: the teaching of Jesus. Let me put it and frame
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Speaker 2: it in the broader context. The men and women who
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Speaker 2: literally shaped Western civilization because the teaching of Jesus. No
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Speaker 2: one denies this shaped Western civilization. These men and women
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Speaker 2: were no strangers to broken hearts and dreams that would
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Speaker 2: not could not come true. And as it turns out,
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Speaker 2: they were not cursed, they were actually blessed. As it
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Speaker 2: turns out, they weren't broken, They were actually chosen. They
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Speaker 2: did not choose the hand they were dealt, but they
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Speaker 2: chose to trust the hand that dealt it. And they
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Speaker 2: had the same questions you have, and the same questions
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Speaker 2: I have. And they had the same struggles you have,
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Speaker 2: and the same struggles I have. And the struggle was this, God,
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Speaker 2: you could have done this differently. God, you could have
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Speaker 2: done for me what you did for her. God, you
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Speaker 2: could have done for me what you did for him,
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Speaker 2: but you chose not to. And these fabulous, extraordinary men
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Speaker 2: and women accepted the hand they were dealt, and they
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Speaker 2: accepted the hand that dealt it, and they were part
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Speaker 2: of changing and shaping Western civilization. This is why I
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Speaker 2: say that, regardless of which of your dreams can't come true,
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Speaker 2: come true, and regardless of how broken your heart is,
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Speaker 2: there is always a purpose for your life if you
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Speaker 2: have the courage to keep your hands and your heart
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Speaker 2: and your mind open to your heavenly father, who chooses
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Speaker 2: to accomplish his will through broken hearted people and people
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Speaker 2: whose personal dream can't come true. The most, maybe the
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Speaker 2: second or third most famous person of all who experienced
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Speaker 2: this is someone we've all heard of, Mary, the mother
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Speaker 2: of Jesus. When Mary found out that her world would
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Speaker 2: not be the way she had anticipated, when she realized
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Speaker 2: her life was not going to play out the way
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Speaker 2: she thought it would play out, when she realized that
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Speaker 2: her whole life was going to be turned upside down,
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Speaker 2: that her reputation in that very small community was shot.
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Speaker 2: When she heard a prophet came to her after Jesus
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Speaker 2: was born, when Jesus was very very very very very
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Speaker 2: young and a prophet came to her and said, Mary,
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Speaker 2: I have a word from God for you. And here
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Speaker 2: is God's word to you. Mary, A sword will pierce
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Speaker 2: your soul. A sword will pier I bet she thought,
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Speaker 2: wait a minute, that that's not the little sticky note
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Speaker 2: I have on my mirror at home. The sticky note
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Speaker 2: I have on my mirror at home is that the
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Speaker 2: Lord says, I have plans for you, not to hurt you,
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Speaker 2: but to bless you. And that's the sticky note I
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Speaker 2: have on my little mirror at home. And the prophet
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Speaker 2: says to Mary, No, here's God's word to you. A
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Speaker 2: sword will pierce your soul. But you've not been abandoned,
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Speaker 2: You're not cursed. You are blessed among women. And Mary's
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Speaker 2: response to the realization that her life would be nothing
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Speaker 2: like she planned was this, I am.
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Speaker 1: The Lord's servant.
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Speaker 2: John the Baptist who introduced Jesus to planet Earth. John
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Speaker 2: the Baptist who set the stage, who got everything ready
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Speaker 2: so that when Jesus showed up, he would be recognized.
11:40
Speaker 2: John the Baptist, when he realized his fifteen minutes of
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Speaker 2: fame was coming to an end, and not just any end.
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Speaker 2: A poorly planned end, an abrupt end, a violent end.
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Speaker 2: He responded to those who brought this to his attention.
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Speaker 2: He said, Hey, a person can only receive what is
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Speaker 2: given them from heaven. A person can only know. This
12:00
Speaker 2: isn't my plan. This isn't how I thought it would
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Speaker 2: play out. I certainly thought I would live a long,
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Speaker 2: fruitful life. I thought I would see the King return.
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Speaker 2: I thought I would see the Messiah come. I thought
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Speaker 2: I would see the nation restored. But if this is
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Speaker 2: the plan God has for me, a person can only
12:13
Speaker 2: receive what is given to him from Heaven or Jesus
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Speaker 2: on the night of his arrest.
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Speaker 1: We all know this story. Who prayed and he said.
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Speaker 2: God, if I wrote the script, the script wouldn't look
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Speaker 2: like this. And God, if I got to choose the
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Speaker 2: plans or for my future, it wouldn't look like this.
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Speaker 2: But if you would just could we just change the plan?
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Speaker 2: Could you take this cup from me? But just so
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Speaker 2: you know, Heavenly Father, not my will, but yours be done.
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Speaker 2: And see, I've seen what you've seen. I've seen people resist,
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Speaker 2: and I've seen people push back, and I've seen people
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Speaker 2: panic when they realize their heart's broken, their dreams aren't
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Speaker 2: coming true, that they've been abandoned. I've seen people like
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Speaker 2: you have, and perhaps this, maybe this is part of
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Speaker 2: your story. I've seen people allow.
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Speaker 1: Fear to inform their decisions. I've talked to people like
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Speaker 1: you have.
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Speaker 2: Maybe this is your story who in the midst of
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Speaker 2: a heartbreak, in the midst of the realizing their dreams
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Speaker 2: aren't coming true and God isn't answering their prayers, they
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Speaker 2: just lose faith and they give up, and they say
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Speaker 2: yes to anyone, and they say yes to anything, and
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Speaker 2: they say yes to the next opportunity, even when they
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Speaker 2: know it's not the best opportunity, even when they know
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Speaker 2: it's not the wise thing to do in that season
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Speaker 2: of life. I've seen what happens when people try to
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Speaker 2: make something happen, and you know the outcome of that.
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Speaker 1: Again, maybe it's part of your story.
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Speaker 2: Their desperation leads to greater despair. But I've seen the
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Speaker 2: flip side of that, just like you have. And maybe
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Speaker 2: this is your story.
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Speaker 1: Some of the most remarkable people I've ever met.
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Speaker 2: In fact, I guess I could say the most remarkable
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Speaker 2: people I've ever met are people whose dreams didn't come true,
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Speaker 2: whose people whose lives didn't play out.
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Speaker 1: The way they thought it would.
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Speaker 2: But the people that somehow, some way, and this is
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Speaker 2: our challenge, remained open and available to the possibilities of
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Speaker 2: what God had for them in spite of the fact
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Speaker 2: that it did not line up with their plans for
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Speaker 2: their lives. You've met these people. They're remarkable. They refuse
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Speaker 2: to become cynics. They refuse cynicism, they refuse bitterness, and.
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Speaker 1: They refuse labels.
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Speaker 2: These are the people who've learned something and identified something
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Speaker 2: in them and have resisted this thing in them that
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Speaker 2: I think all of us have in us a little bit,
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Speaker 2: because I think part of our problem is there is
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Speaker 2: a little prosperity gospel in all of us. And you
14:38
Speaker 2: know what the prosperity gospel is. The prosperity gospel is
14:40
Speaker 2: give God one, He'll give you ten. If you do this,
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Speaker 2: God will do that. If you keep your side of
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Speaker 2: the bargain, God will keep his side of the bargain.
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Speaker 2: The prosperity gospel is there's a little bit of it
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Speaker 2: in all of us. It kind of goes like this,
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Speaker 2: since I did well, then God must because isn't this
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Speaker 2: a bargaining chip isn't this an equation? Isn't it isn't
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Speaker 2: isn't it the way that life works? And if I
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Speaker 2: do the right things, the right things happen for me.
15:03
Speaker 2: And if you were raised with a version of religion,
15:06
Speaker 2: or if you were raised with a version of Christianity
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Speaker 2: that came in this rapper, you've already discovered that this
15:12
Speaker 2: version is very, very easy to walk away from. It
15:15
Speaker 2: is very difficult to remain faithful when God doesn't uphold
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Speaker 2: his end of the bargain. But what you should know
15:22
Speaker 2: is that is not the original version. That's the version
15:27
Speaker 2: that's easy to leave. The God who doesn't allow bad
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Speaker 2: things to happen to good people, the God who doesn't
15:33
Speaker 2: allow bad things to happen to good people. That God
15:36
Speaker 2: does not exist. But that has never been our God,
15:40
Speaker 2: and that is not God, the Father that Jesus introduced
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Speaker 2: the world to. In fact, in the center of Christianity,
15:46
Speaker 2: I've told you this before, the center of Christianity stands
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Speaker 2: the best possible person, and the worst possible thing happened
15:54
Speaker 2: to the best possible person. Because Jesus did not come
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Speaker 2: offering us an equation. He offered us an invitation, and
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Speaker 2: his invitation as much as we want to push this away,
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Speaker 2: makes more sense the older you get and the longer
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Speaker 2: you live, and the more people you meet. His invitation
16:12
Speaker 2: was to lose our lives so that we could actually
16:16
Speaker 2: find life. And then he modeled it by laying down
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Speaker 2: his life and taking it up again. And then he
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Speaker 2: extended his invitation, and his invitation is this, follow me.
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Speaker 2: Follow me not because of what he would do. Jesus said,
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Speaker 2: I want you to follow me because of who I
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Speaker 2: am and what I've already done. And this is what
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Speaker 2: some of the most remarkable people you will ever meet
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Speaker 2: in your life. Understand that the invitation of Christianity is
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Speaker 2: not to an equation. It's not to it. If you
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Speaker 2: do God will automatically. It's way better than that. It's
16:54
Speaker 2: an invitation to follow your savior because of what he
16:58
Speaker 2: has all ready done. And this has been the standing
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Speaker 2: invitation since the very beginning of Christianity.
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Speaker 1: This is the.
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Speaker 2: Invitation that has been accepted by so many broken hearted people,
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Speaker 2: people whose dreams would not come true. And here's what
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Speaker 2: they discovered. This is where peace is found, this is
17:20
Speaker 2: where striving ends. This is how you live your life
17:26
Speaker 2: with your hands wide open, even when your dreams won't
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Speaker 2: come true, and your heart is broken. This invitation is
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Speaker 2: how you live with the standpoint and with the posture.
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Speaker 1: Of thy will, not my will, be done.
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Speaker 2: These are the people that have changed the world, and
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Speaker 2: these are the people that get the attention of other people.
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Speaker 2: And these are the people who have that inner sense
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Speaker 2: of peace that surpasses, as the Apostle paulicies, the peace
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Speaker 2: that surpasses all comprehension, which means it just doesn't make
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Speaker 2: any sense.
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Speaker 1: David as in David and Goliath. David is in King.
18:09
Speaker 1: David is in David the King of Israel.
18:12
Speaker 2: David learned this the hard way, and towards the very
18:16
Speaker 2: end of his life, when he was in his sixties.
18:18
Speaker 1: When he was in his sixties, he.
18:20
Speaker 2: Makes an extraordinary, extraordinary statement that I think that I
18:24
Speaker 2: think summarizes this whole idea, maybe better than anything else
18:27
Speaker 2: in the Old or the New Testament. But the statement
18:30
Speaker 2: that he leaves us with only makes sense if you
18:32
Speaker 2: know his story, and perhaps you know part of his story.
18:35
Speaker 2: If you were raised going to synagogue or to church,
18:37
Speaker 2: you know something about the life of David. He shows
18:39
Speaker 2: up in the pages of history as a shepherd boy
18:42
Speaker 2: and one day the prophet Samuel comes to his house
18:44
Speaker 2: and he says, David. He says, it's in front of
18:46
Speaker 2: his whole family. David, God, David's like a kid. God
18:49
Speaker 2: has chosen you to be the next king of Israel.
18:52
Speaker 2: But of course Israel already had a king, so that
18:54
Speaker 2: posed a problem. And then David went back to keeping sheep.
18:58
Speaker 2: And then one afternoon David goes to check on his
19:00
Speaker 2: brothers because his father sends him to check on his brothers,
19:02
Speaker 2: who are all soldiers in the army of King Saul.
19:05
Speaker 2: And there was that extraordinary event that most of us
19:07
Speaker 2: know about, where Goliath kept coming down into the Valley
19:09
Speaker 2: of Elah and taunting the nation and taunting the people
19:13
Speaker 2: of Israel, and taunting the armies of Israel. And David,
19:16
Speaker 2: who's maybe fifteen or sixteen at the time, sees this
19:19
Speaker 2: in a completely different way, and he realizes he's not
19:22
Speaker 2: taunting our armies. He's taunting our God. And our God
19:24
Speaker 2: is bigger than the Philistine God. And he marches down
19:26
Speaker 2: into the valley and he slays a giant, and overnight
19:29
Speaker 2: he becomes almost a living legend, a folk hero. Eventually
19:34
Speaker 2: he's accepted into Saul's family, and Saul offers one of
19:36
Speaker 2: his the king. Saul offers one of his daughters to David.
19:38
Speaker 2: So he imagined he marries the king's daughter. He's already
19:42
Speaker 2: been anointed the next king. Now he's married the current
19:44
Speaker 2: king's daughter. I mean, he is set for life. But
19:49
Speaker 2: then Saul realizes he's made a terrible mistake bringing this
19:52
Speaker 2: legend into his family. Because people love David more than
19:55
Speaker 2: they love Saul, and they love David more than they
19:57
Speaker 2: love Saul. They're gonna love David more than they love
20:00
Speaker 2: all son. And Saul wants his son Jonathan to be
20:03
Speaker 2: the next king, and so Saul kind of loses his mind.
20:05
Speaker 2: He becomes very angry and he tries to kill David.
20:09
Speaker 2: And David flees this capital city, leaves everybody he knows,
20:14
Speaker 2: everything he knows. He can't go home because he would
20:16
Speaker 2: put his own family's life in danger. And suddenly he
20:19
Speaker 2: runs for his life. He's a fugitive and his future
20:22
Speaker 2: goes dark, and he's alone, and he's abandoned, and his
20:28
Speaker 2: heart is broken and he doesn't know what to do,
20:31
Speaker 2: and he panics.
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Speaker 1: He goes to a little.
20:34
Speaker 2: Village called nob nob was populated primarily by priest. And
20:39
Speaker 2: he has a friend there, a priest named a Himelech,
20:41
Speaker 2: and he comes to him, a Hemelek, and he lies.
20:43
Speaker 2: He says, a Himelech, I'm here on the king's business,
20:46
Speaker 2: and of course a Hemelex saying, well, where's your men?
20:48
Speaker 1: Well there's somewhere else.
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Speaker 2: Well, David, you're all by yourself. I know it's unusual
20:52
Speaker 2: for me to be by myself. And by the way,
20:54
Speaker 2: I was in such a hurry to do the king's business.
20:56
Speaker 2: I didn't bring any food. Do you have any food?
20:58
Speaker 2: I was in such a hurry to do the king's business.
21:00
Speaker 2: I didn't bring any weapons. Do you have any weapons?
21:03
Speaker 2: Here's exactly what the text says. Do you have a spear?
21:07
Speaker 1: You know? Do you have like a spare spear or
21:09
Speaker 1: a sword? Laying around here?
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Speaker 2: And Ahimelex looking at David, going, something is wrong with
21:12
Speaker 2: this picture. I mean you're David. I mean you're David
21:15
Speaker 2: and Goliath. David, you're the king's son in law. Means
21:18
Speaker 2: something's wrong. I haven't brought my sword. You haven't brought
21:21
Speaker 2: your sword or any other weapon, because, oh, the king's
21:24
Speaker 2: mission was so urgent. He just lies because he panics
21:27
Speaker 2: and he lies, and isn't that what we do when
21:29
Speaker 2: our hearts are broken? Isn't that what we do when
21:32
Speaker 2: suddenly things are slipping out of control? We panic, and
21:35
Speaker 2: we'll say whatever we need to say to have our way.
21:38
Speaker 2: And then something very dramatic happens. If this is so dramatic,
21:40
Speaker 2: I can't even create the energy or the emotion around
21:43
Speaker 2: this moment. The priest, the Himelex says, well, there's like
21:48
Speaker 2: just one weapon here.
21:49
Speaker 1: It's a sword. It's a sword you're familiar with, David.
21:52
Speaker 2: The only weapon we have here is the sword of Goliath,
21:58
Speaker 2: the Philistine who, by the way, you're David, you.
22:00
Speaker 1: Were there, whom you killed in the Valley of a Law.
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Speaker 1: It's here.
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Speaker 2: And suddenly a himalet brings out a visual aid, a
22:08
Speaker 2: reminder of God's faithfulness to David in the past, a
22:13
Speaker 2: reminder that God had made David a promise, a reminder
22:17
Speaker 2: that God had invited David to trust him even when
22:20
Speaker 2: life doesn't make sense, because that's this point in his life,
22:23
Speaker 2: it just didn't make any sense. Their visual reminder of
22:26
Speaker 2: God's protection his promised to David. But here's where David
22:31
Speaker 2: is in the moment here's where maybe you are in
22:33
Speaker 2: the moment. David isn't looking back. David's looking forward, and
22:37
Speaker 2: it's dark, and it's hopeless, and he's helpless, and he
22:43
Speaker 2: decides to take matters literally into his own hands.
22:49
Speaker 1: And David said to the priest, there is none like it.
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Speaker 1: Give it to me.
22:56
Speaker 2: But instead of Goliath's sword protect David's life, it sealed
23:02
Speaker 2: a Heimelech's fate because it was reported back to King
23:06
Speaker 2: Saul that Ahimelek had aided the king's enemy. And Saul
23:11
Speaker 2: shows up with an arm with a small army, and
23:14
Speaker 2: he accuses a Hemelech of aiding and abetting his enemy.
23:17
Speaker 2: And Ahimelech's like, wait a minute, he's your son in law,
23:19
Speaker 2: and he's David. He's David and Goliath David, I mean,
23:22
Speaker 2: of course I aided him. Why wouldn't I? And King
23:24
Speaker 2: Saul was so angry. He had a Hemelect cut down
23:27
Speaker 2: by the sword. Every single priest and nob cut down
23:30
Speaker 2: by the sword, their wives, their children, and the text
23:33
Speaker 2: says even the infants. He killed everything in the village.
23:36
Speaker 2: He was so angry because he was so jealous. And
23:39
Speaker 2: when David gets news of what happened, he was devastated,
23:44
Speaker 2: and suddenly his life and suddenly everything about his life
23:48
Speaker 2: just became exponentially more complicated because everyone knew he lied
23:54
Speaker 2: and he was to blame for what happened.
23:57
Speaker 1: And nob.
24:00
Speaker 2: Time goes by, David becomes king. An incredible story. David
24:05
Speaker 2: has ups and downs. David is a terrible father. He
24:09
Speaker 2: lost his moral authority because of his affair with Bathsheba.
24:13
Speaker 2: And now we find David in his sixties. We find
24:16
Speaker 2: David in his sixties, and he finds himself in an
24:19
Speaker 2: eerily similar situation. His favorite child, his favorite son, Absalom, Absalom,
24:26
Speaker 2: who would probably be the king after David died. Absalom,
24:30
Speaker 2: who David just loved Wafar and above all of his
24:33
Speaker 2: other children. Absalom is so angry with his father because
24:37
Speaker 2: his father didn't respond to the rape of his sister
24:40
Speaker 2: that Absalom decides to go out and undermine David's authority.
24:44
Speaker 2: And it's a long, interesting story you should read on
24:46
Speaker 2: your own how he does this. But for four years,
24:48
Speaker 2: Absalom plots against his father and he keeps it a secret,
24:52
Speaker 2: and he raises his own army, and he steals the
24:55
Speaker 2: loyalty of the people and then on a given day,
24:58
Speaker 2: he announces himself king, and he marches on the capital
25:02
Speaker 2: city to take the throne away from his father, and
25:08
Speaker 2: to spare the citizens, and to spare the city, and
25:12
Speaker 2: to spare the ark of the Covenant and everything that
25:14
Speaker 2: Jerusalem represented. David in a hurry, packs up his family,
25:18
Speaker 2: packs up those who are closest to him, and he
25:21
Speaker 2: leaves and abandons the city. And once again the future
25:27
Speaker 2: is dark, and once again he's a fugitive. But now
25:31
Speaker 2: he's in the sixties. He's at war with his son.
25:34
Speaker 2: He's already lost two sons, it looks like he's about
25:37
Speaker 2: to lose a third, his favorite. And the text says
25:41
Speaker 2: that when David and his entourage of families left the
25:44
Speaker 2: city of Jerusalem, that the entire countryside came out to
25:48
Speaker 2: see this. The whole countryside wept aloud as all the
25:51
Speaker 2: people with David passed by, because he was their king,
25:55
Speaker 2: and here he was leaving the city, here he was
25:59
Speaker 2: giving up his throne all of a sudden. There was
26:01
Speaker 2: all kinds of insecurity. There were so many questions. People
26:04
Speaker 2: didn't have answers for all they knew was that their king,
26:07
Speaker 2: who was at this time considered a very old man
26:10
Speaker 2: was abandoning the throne.
26:12
Speaker 1: What would happen the king?
26:13
Speaker 2: Also, King David also crossed the Kidron Valley and all
26:17
Speaker 2: the people moved on toward the wilderness, the wilderness, the
26:22
Speaker 2: very same wilderness he had fled to when he was
26:25
Speaker 2: a much younger man.
26:28
Speaker 1: Have you ever felt like that was your life?
26:31
Speaker 2: This suddenly nothing's like it was all the security gone,
26:34
Speaker 2: everyone you know, gone, everyone you leaned on before gone,
26:37
Speaker 2: and you're headed into the wilderness. Have you ever felt
26:39
Speaker 2: like you're headed back into the same wilderness again? This
26:42
Speaker 2: is the story a famous King David. And then here's
26:46
Speaker 2: the twist.
26:48
Speaker 1: This sets us up for what David would say, that's
26:50
Speaker 1: so powerful. Here's what happened. Zadok was there too.
26:55
Speaker 2: He was a priest, and all the Levites, all the
26:58
Speaker 2: people had attended to this ceremony surrounding Jewish and Hebrew worship,
27:02
Speaker 2: they were with him as well, and they were carrying
27:04
Speaker 2: the Ark of the Covenant of God. So on their
27:08
Speaker 2: way out of the city, Zadok's like, hey, guys, get the.
27:10
Speaker 1: Ark of the Covenant.
27:11
Speaker 2: Now, as you may know, the Ark of the Covenant
27:13
Speaker 2: was where the original Ten Commandments was housed. And some
27:15
Speaker 2: of these very religious and very important artifacts of early
27:20
Speaker 2: Hebrew religion. But the most important thing about the Ark
27:23
Speaker 2: of the Covenant is that it represented the presence of God.
27:26
Speaker 2: That whoever had the ark had the God. Whoever had
27:30
Speaker 2: the ark had the blessing in the presence of God.
27:32
Speaker 2: So Zadok, thinking he's doing a good thing, saying, hey,
27:35
Speaker 2: if the king's leaving the city, God needs to go
27:37
Speaker 2: with him. If the king is leaving the city, we
27:40
Speaker 2: need to take the ark out of the tabernacle, and
27:43
Speaker 2: the ark needs to accompany the king. This was their
27:47
Speaker 2: way of saying, as a big visual it was their
27:49
Speaker 2: way of saying that God is with us. God is
27:53
Speaker 2: on our side. God is not with the rebel Absalom.
27:56
Speaker 2: God is with David, God is with the King. It
27:59
Speaker 2: was the way to to subtly manipulate outcomes. But David
28:05
Speaker 2: had learned his lesson and he was through trying to control.
28:10
Speaker 1: Or manipulate outcomes.
28:12
Speaker 2: He'd already tried twice, once as a young man fleeing
28:16
Speaker 2: for his life and once in the aftermath of his
28:21
Speaker 2: affair with Bathsheba, and in both instances, his panic and
28:26
Speaker 2: his desire to control outcomes resulted in bloodshed, an extraordinary
28:31
Speaker 2: public humiliation, and he was done with that.
28:37
Speaker 1: Here's what he said.
28:38
Speaker 2: When the king saw that the Ark of the Covenant
28:40
Speaker 2: was part of the entourage leaving the city, he said
28:43
Speaker 2: to Zadok, take the Ark of God back into the city.
28:48
Speaker 2: No more manipulation, no more negotiation, no more trying to
28:53
Speaker 2: get God to do my bidding. Take the ark, take
28:56
Speaker 2: the presence of God back.
28:58
Speaker 1: To the city of Jerusalem.
29:00
Speaker 2: But what he said next is for you, and what
29:05
Speaker 2: he said next is certainly for me.
29:09
Speaker 1: Here's what David said.
29:12
Speaker 2: If I find favor in the eyes, in the Lord's eyes,
29:16
Speaker 2: he will bring me back and he will let me
29:20
Speaker 2: see it in his dwelling place again. I have stopped
29:26
Speaker 2: all negotiation with the God of all creation. I've tried
29:31
Speaker 2: to manipulate. I've tried to have my way. I've tried
29:34
Speaker 2: to force my way. I've tried to make things happen.
29:37
Speaker 2: I've tried to keep things from happening. I'm done with that.
29:40
Speaker 2: I've stopped all my negotiating with God. God's will be done.
29:45
Speaker 2: This took me by surprise. This was not in my
29:48
Speaker 2: future in terms of my plans. I'm an old man.
29:51
Speaker 2: I had settled things. I thought, I knew how the
29:53
Speaker 2: rest of my story would play out. This took me
29:56
Speaker 2: by surprise. It did not take God by surprise. But
29:59
Speaker 2: if he said, speaking of God, but if he says,
30:02
Speaker 2: I'm not pleased with you, David, then I'm ready. If
30:06
Speaker 2: I've done something to bring this on myself, I will
30:09
Speaker 2: acknowledge that. Let him do to me, echoing the words
30:14
Speaker 2: in the future of Mary and so many others that
30:17
Speaker 2: would follow, let him do to me whatever seems good
30:21
Speaker 2: to him.
30:24
Speaker 1: I will rest as we sing, I will rest in.
30:29
Speaker 2: The Father's hands. I will leave the outcome. I will
30:33
Speaker 2: leave the rest in my father's capable hands. This is
30:39
Speaker 2: an interruption to my dreams and my plans. It is
30:43
Speaker 2: not an interruption to God's His will be done.
30:49
Speaker 1: Zadok can't believe it.
30:51
Speaker 2: It's like, leave the ark with your son, leave the
30:56
Speaker 2: ark and the city, leave the presence of God. Are
31:00
Speaker 2: not only leaving the city, now, you're leaving the presence
31:02
Speaker 2: of God. And you think somehow this is going to
31:04
Speaker 2: turn out. And the king said to Zadak, he looked
31:07
Speaker 2: at Zadok the priest, He said, do you understand, because
31:10
Speaker 2: apparently Zadok's just staring at him, like, what, go back
31:14
Speaker 2: to the city with my blessing. You're not abandoning me.
31:17
Speaker 2: No one will accuse you of abandoning the king. I'm
31:19
Speaker 2: giving you my blessing. Go back into the city. And
31:23
Speaker 2: so Zadok and Abythar took the Ark of God back
31:27
Speaker 2: to Jerusalem and stayed there, but David continued the journey.
31:32
Speaker 2: But David continued up the Mount of Olives, weeping as
31:36
Speaker 2: he went. His head was covered and he was barefoot,
31:42
Speaker 2: mourning with a broken heart. Now he's lost three sons.
31:47
Speaker 2: His future is dark. None of his future dreams will
31:51
Speaker 2: come true. None of this will play out the way
31:54
Speaker 2: he thought it would. He's lost his dignity, he's lost
31:58
Speaker 2: his kingdom, he's lost his dream. But somehow, some way,
32:06
Speaker 2: and you know, people like this, he had not lost
32:09
Speaker 2: his confidence in God. He didn't abandon God, even when
32:15
Speaker 2: it seemed, when it was so clear that God had
32:17
Speaker 2: clearly abandoned him. He had seen where fear and panic
32:22
Speaker 2: and manipulation and control leads. This time he chose not
32:27
Speaker 2: to reach for Goliath's sword. This time, he chose not
32:32
Speaker 2: to take matters into his own hands. This time, he
32:34
Speaker 2: chose not to try to make something happen. This time,
32:39
Speaker 2: he did not anchor his faith to the fulfillment of
32:44
Speaker 2: his dreams. Because when you anchor your faith in God
32:48
Speaker 2: to the fulfillment of your dreams, you set yourself up
32:51
Speaker 2: to lose your confidence in faith in God. So here's
32:57
Speaker 2: the invitation to all of us. In fact, this isn't
32:59
Speaker 2: a one time invitation. I think this is a daily invitation.
33:03
Speaker 2: The invitation is, would you and would I like David,
33:07
Speaker 2: and like Mary, and honestly, like many of the people
33:10
Speaker 2: around you, people who've lost marriages, people who've lost kids,
33:16
Speaker 2: people who've lost the opportunity to have a relationship with
33:18
Speaker 2: their grandkids because of the decisions people made, people who've
33:21
Speaker 2: lost fortunes, people who've lost inheritances, people who've lost partnerships,
33:25
Speaker 2: people who've lost just about anything you can imagine. Would
33:29
Speaker 2: you be willing, like David and like Mary, to open
33:32
Speaker 2: your hand and declare, with David, here are my dreams,
33:35
Speaker 2: and here are my plans. But they're my dreams, and
33:38
Speaker 2: they're my plans. You do with them as you wish,
33:42
Speaker 2: and do to me whatever seems good to you. No bargaining,
33:48
Speaker 2: no equations, no negotiating, You know my desires, you know
33:53
Speaker 2: my hopes and my dreams. In fact, the New Testament
33:56
Speaker 2: teaches us and tells us that we can bring our
33:58
Speaker 2: hopes in our dreams. We can cast all of our
34:00
Speaker 2: cares on God, knowing that he cares for us, and
34:02
Speaker 2: knowing that He cares what's important to us. You know
34:05
Speaker 2: my desires, but I acknowledge your right to rule. Because
34:11
Speaker 2: the truth is this, even if your heart is broken,
34:14
Speaker 2: it doesn't mean you're broken. Even when your dreams can't
34:17
Speaker 2: come true, it doesn't mean that God doesn't have a
34:20
Speaker 2: significant purpose for you. The men and women again, the
34:26
Speaker 2: men and women who brought us the story of Jesus.
34:28
Speaker 2: The men and women who brought us the story of
34:30
Speaker 2: Jesus did not remain faithful of what they hoped would happen.
34:35
Speaker 2: And because of that what they hoped would happen happened,
34:38
Speaker 2: they remained faithful because of what had already happened. God
34:44
Speaker 2: had become flesh and dwelt among them to demonstrate that
34:48
Speaker 2: He was for them, and to demonstrate that He is
34:52
Speaker 2: for you.
34:55
Speaker 1: At the center of our story as Christians.
34:59
Speaker 2: Stands the story of the best possible man who deserved
35:02
Speaker 2: the best possible life and chose the worst possible end
35:07
Speaker 2: for us. It was his way of saying that, even
35:10
Speaker 2: when your dreams can't come true, I still love you,
35:14
Speaker 2: and I still have a plan for you, and I
35:17
Speaker 2: know what's best for you. So when your heart is broken,
35:22
Speaker 2: when your dreams can't come true, when my heart is broken,
35:26
Speaker 2: when my dreams can't come true, that's our cue. Not
35:30
Speaker 2: to run, not to manipulate, not to take matters into
35:33
Speaker 2: our own hands, not to reach for Goliath's sword, but
35:36
Speaker 2: instead to lean in, to look up and to reach out.
35:42
Speaker 1: The very opposite of what we feel like doing in
35:44
Speaker 1: those moments.
35:45
Speaker 2: Right, to lean in, to look up, and to reach
35:49
Speaker 2: out to the God who has your whole world in
35:58
Speaker 2: his hands. That's the time to pray, along with David
36:05
Speaker 2: and millions since them, Heavenly Father, I offer you my
36:10
Speaker 2: dreams and plans. Do to me whatever seems good to you.
36:16
Speaker 2: I not acknowledge your right to rule your will be
36:19
Speaker 2: done and me. I offer you my dreams and my
36:25
Speaker 2: plans because you care. Do to me whatever seems good
36:30
Speaker 2: to you. I acknowledge your right to rule your will
36:36
Speaker 2: be done and me. This is what we have all
36:41
Speaker 2: been invited to every single day of our lives, regardless.
36:45
Speaker 1: Of our circumstances, but in particular.
36:47
Speaker 2: This is what we've all been invited to when it
36:51
Speaker 2: dawns on us that are dreams aren't coming true, that
36:54
Speaker 2: they can't come true, that God still very much cares about.
37:02
Speaker 1: Yeah,