Latest / ok storytime / My parents brought me RARE gluten free treats… so my partner ate them out of spite! -r/AmITheAsshole | Reddit Stories | EP3070

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My parents brought me RARE gluten free treats… so my partner ate them out of spite! -r/AmITheAsshole | Reddit Stories | EP3070 · ok storytime

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Hey, this is Keon.
• 0:01
  Speaker 2: And this is Dakota, your favorite OK Storytime host. And
• 0:04
  Speaker 2: we've got some great stories coming up. But before that,
• 0:07
  Speaker 2: we have a two-minute break from the sponsors that keep
• 0:09
  Speaker 2: the show going.
• 0:10
  Speaker 3: My parents brought me rare gluten-free treats, so my partner
• 0:14
  Speaker 3: ate them out of spite.
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: Maybe he's just testing them for poison.
• 0:18
  Speaker 3: I will try to word this as neutrally as possible,
• 0:21
  Speaker 3: but I obviously have biases and I'm also very emotional
• 0:24
  Speaker 3: right now. Keep that in mind. I, 22, have celiac
• 0:27
  Speaker 3: disease and live in a country where gluten-free products are
• 0:30
  Speaker 3: available in stores, but are also really crappy compared to
• 0:33
  Speaker 3: most other countries around. The available options are dry, crumbly,
• 0:37
  Speaker 3: obviously also very expensive, and generally just poor quality. If
• 0:41
  Speaker 3: I want good gluten-free treats, I have to order them
• 0:44
  Speaker 3: from other countries online or go there myself. I am
• 0:47
  Speaker 3: lucky enough that my parents travel a lot and will
• 0:49
  Speaker 3: usually bring some gluten-free goodies with them from their trip.
• 0:52
  Speaker 3: I also have a partner, 29, who is not celiac
• 0:56
  Speaker 3: or gluten-free, but will often choose to eat gluten-free products
• 0:59
  Speaker 3: to avoid getting me sick. This is something I very
• 1:01
  Speaker 3: much value. We've been dating for one and a half
• 1:04
  Speaker 3: years and live together. She lives by a one-to-one principle,
• 1:07
  Speaker 3: as in she gets something, I get something, specifically when
• 1:10
  Speaker 3: it comes to food. She has a very bad relationship
• 1:12
  Speaker 3: with food, including past food insecurity. and really is working
• 1:16
  Speaker 3: to better her eating habits. This all leads us to today.
• 1:20
  Speaker 3: By the way, this comes from The Orange Knights, and
• 1:22
  Speaker 3: if you want to submit your own stories, go to
• 1:24
  Speaker 3: the r slash ok story time subreddit.
• 1:25
  Speaker 2: I'm Sophia.
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: I'm Keon.
• 1:27
  Speaker 3: And we're here to give good advice goofily, but we
• 1:29
  Speaker 3: don't have all the answers. We only know what we'd do.
• 1:31
  Speaker 3: So let us know what you would do in the comments.
• 1:33
  Speaker 3: And Opie says... My parents were so kind as to
• 1:36
  Speaker 3: bring us an assortment of gluten-free baked goods from their
• 1:40
  Speaker 3: latest trip. And when we went over this afternoon, my
• 1:42
  Speaker 3: mom handed them over to us saying they're to share.
• 1:45
  Speaker 3: After getting home, I decided to try one of the treats,
• 1:48
  Speaker 3: a chocolate muffin, and got emotional about just how delicious
• 1:52
  Speaker 3: and moist it was. It was so good, I repeatedly
• 1:55
  Speaker 3: checked the packaging to make sure it was actually gluten-free.
• 1:59
  Speaker 3: I ate half, and there was a second muffin left
• 2:01
  Speaker 3: in the package. I go into her bedroom after, because
• 2:03
  Speaker 3: I know how she is when it comes to food,
• 2:06
  Speaker 3: and ask if it's okay if I buy her muffins tomorrow.
• 2:08
  Speaker 3: And in turn, she doesn't eat my gluten-free ones. She
• 2:11
  Speaker 3: does not understand, and repeatedly says she wants to try these.
• 2:15
  Speaker 3: and that my mother bought these to share. I have
• 2:18
  Speaker 3: little understanding because she can go to any store any
• 2:20
  Speaker 3: day and buy whatever muffin she wants. I literally cannot.
• 2:24
  Speaker 3: I am willing to share everything else I got, but
• 2:27
  Speaker 3: not these muffins. If I want these specific muffins, I
• 2:30
  Speaker 3: would have to fly to another country or see if
• 2:32
  Speaker 3: they're available online. And if they are, they will be
• 2:35
  Speaker 3: insanely expensive. This all evolves into a huge fight. That's ridiculous.
• 2:41
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 2:41
  Speaker 3: That's ridiculous.
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: Let's take a pause here.
• 2:43
  Speaker 4: Yes.
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: Do we think Opie's being greedy or she's in the right?
• 2:47
  Speaker 3: If I'm, you know, if I'm at a party and
• 2:50
  Speaker 3: there's really good, let's say there's really good salmon and
• 2:54
  Speaker 3: there's also, you know, steak or chicken wings or whatever.
• 2:58
  Speaker 3: And there's a certain amount of salmon that I can
• 3:01
  Speaker 3: eat or whatever. And my partner and I go over
• 3:04
  Speaker 3: and they're like, oh, everything's to share. But there's only,
• 3:07
  Speaker 3: let's say like one piece of my partner's not going
• 3:10
  Speaker 3: to be like, oh, I want half that piece. Like
• 3:12
  Speaker 3: you have to give me half that piece. They said
• 3:14
  Speaker 3: that it's all to share.
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: It's to share.
• 3:16
  Speaker 3: Yeah. Because I, yes, there's only one piece, but I
• 3:19
  Speaker 3: can only eat the salmon. He can eat the chicken.
• 3:21
  Speaker 3: So I think that's ridiculous that your partner is getting
• 3:24
  Speaker 3: upset about a chocolate muffin that she could probably find.
• 3:27
  Speaker 2: An even better one.
• 3:28
  Speaker 1: I was going to say, she could probably find an
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: even better one or like triple chocolate, non-gluten free, you know,
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: where you guys live.
• 3:36
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 3:37
  Speaker 1: I understand. I feel like I agree with you. I
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: feel like I'm on OP's side if, you know... So
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: if it's something I can't have.
• 3:43
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: And I get this, but my partner can have whatever.
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: Let's come on. Maybe like a bite like to try it.
• 3:50
  Speaker 3: If you want to try it, I'd be like, hey,
• 3:51
  Speaker 3: can I just try it?
• 3:52
  Speaker 1: Like half of like not even half, maybe like a quarter,
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: something like that. Just to try it because I get it.
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: My partner's also trying to eat what I eat.
• 3:59
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: And I that's something on the table that I like.
• 4:03
  Speaker 3: Which is that is even crazier to me because the
• 4:06
  Speaker 3: whole impetus of her eating what Opie eats is to
• 4:10
  Speaker 3: help Opie. And then for her to be like, no,
• 4:12
  Speaker 3: I want it.
• 4:13
  Speaker 2: I want it. She just loves gluten-free stuff. She's like,
• 4:16
  Speaker 2: it's better.
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: Yeah. I think Opie's partner is a bit of an
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: a-hole here. I agree. To try, understandable. Totally understandable. But
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: to like, hey, there's only two muffins.
• 4:26
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: And it tastes, it tastes so good. It tastes like childhood.
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: Like I can, I can actually eat this before I
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: had celiac or I can actually, it tastes so good.
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: This is not fair.
• 4:36
  Speaker 3: Yeah. And the partner's like, give it to me. Goleming
• 4:40
  Speaker 3: over the freaking muffin. This all evolves into a huge fight.
• 4:43
  Speaker 3: We have previously had fights about me not wanting to
• 4:46
  Speaker 3: share a special gluten-free food because I do not get
• 4:48
  Speaker 3: it often. That's so reasonable. I think we've discussed, I
• 4:52
  Speaker 3: think we know who the person in the wrong here is.
• 4:54
  Speaker 1: Truly. I mean, I think sharing is caring. I love
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: sharing my food. You've witnessed it. I love sharing my
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: food as long as my friends can have it.
• 5:01
  Speaker 3: Exactly.
• 5:03
  Speaker 1: But this is one time where this is something so
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: special to me that I can only eat. Come on,
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: let's be real here.
• 5:10
  Speaker 3: If I were Opie's partner, I would be figuring out
• 5:12
  Speaker 3: how to make these so that they could have them
• 5:16
  Speaker 3: all the time. At some point, I walk off because
• 5:19
  Speaker 3: I was crying and she accused me of being manipulative.
• 5:23
  Speaker 3: A few minutes pass and then she comes to me,
• 5:25
  Speaker 3: throws 20 bucks at me and says she's buying the muffin.
• 5:28
  Speaker 3: I tell her to keep her money. I just want
• 5:30
  Speaker 3: these two muffins. She then goes to the kitchen and
• 5:33
  Speaker 3: begins eating the muffin in front of me. If this
• 5:36
  Speaker 3: is a thing that happens a lot, I am reconsidering this.
• 5:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah. If my partner throws money at me, like, I
• 5:42
  Speaker 1: don't know, like a paper ball for a muffin let's
• 5:45
  Speaker 1: be honest she didn't throw the money like it was
• 5:47
  Speaker 1: like oh paper go it was just like it was
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: a crumpled.
• 5:51
  Speaker 3: Bill crumpled bill that she threw at you not looking
• 5:55
  Speaker 3: good i'm so mad at her that i can tell
• 5:58
  Speaker 3: her that she can look for a new partner and
• 6:00
  Speaker 3: eat their food because i'm done i'm currently writing this
• 6:03
  Speaker 3: from the couch where i will sleep tonight i do
• 6:05
  Speaker 3: not want to end my relationship over a muffin but
• 6:08
  Speaker 3: am i in the wrong for not wanting to share
• 6:10
  Speaker 3: one muffin No.
• 6:11
  Speaker 1: So you can pull up the comments on that one.
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: I want to see the comments. Sometimes I love these
• 6:15
  Speaker 1: stories that we don't get comments. I need to see comments.
• 6:17
  Speaker 3: I need to know. I need to know what the
• 6:19
  Speaker 3: people think. Yeah. We've got not the a-hole. Your girlfriend
• 6:23
  Speaker 3: is genuinely cruel for this.
• 6:24
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 6:26
  Speaker 3: Someone says not the a-hole. She lacks empathy and that's
• 6:28
  Speaker 3: something I wouldn't want in a partner. She is the a-hole.
• 6:31
  Speaker 3: I have several food intolerances and my partner thankfully understands
• 6:34
  Speaker 3: that and doesn't eat my food. Yeah. That is expensive
• 6:37
  Speaker 3: or complicated to cook.
• 6:38
  Speaker 1: Very easy. Okay, great. I was going to say, comments
• 6:41
  Speaker 1: should be agreeing with us. It's not about the muffin.
• 6:44
  Speaker 3: No, it's not.
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: It's not about the muffin.
• 6:47
  Speaker 2: Truly.
• 6:48
  Speaker 3: Yeah. And she's going to make you think that it is.
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: That you're breaking up over a muffin?
• 6:52
  Speaker 3: She's going to keep going, oh, you're breaking up over me?
• 6:54
  Speaker 3: Or you're breaking up with me over a muffin? And
• 6:57
  Speaker 3: that's not what's happening here.
• 6:58
  Speaker 1: It's the lack of respect, OP.
• 7:00
  Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah. It's genuinely so ridiculous.
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: And that's the end of this story. We're good to go.
• 7:07
  Speaker 1: On to the next one.
• 7:08
  Speaker 3: My boyfriend's sister claims my baby as ours and I
• 7:12
  Speaker 3: can't take it anymore.
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: That's not our baby.
• 7:15
  Speaker 3: Before I begin, I would like to point out that
• 7:17
  Speaker 3: my boyfriend has a very small nuclear family. His mom
• 7:20
  Speaker 3: passed away about a year ago, and his older sister
• 7:22
  Speaker 3: passed away when he was 15. Now, his family pretty
• 7:25
  Speaker 3: much only includes his sister and his dad, who more
• 7:28
  Speaker 3: recently has become present in his life after his mom's passing. I, 24,
• 7:32
  Speaker 3: have been with my boyfriend, 26 male, for about four years.
• 7:36
  Speaker 3: In the beginning of our relationship, I always found his sister,
• 7:39
  Speaker 3: 25 female... to be a little odd. However, most of
• 7:42
  Speaker 3: the strange things she would say or do were pretty tame,
• 7:45
  Speaker 3: and I ignored them for the most part. My boyfriend
• 7:47
  Speaker 3: and I ended up renting a small house with his
• 7:49
  Speaker 3: sister after their mom passed away. While living with her,
• 7:52
  Speaker 3: I honestly think that I got to know her too well,
• 7:55
  Speaker 3: and now I have very few positive things to say
• 7:58
  Speaker 3: about her.
• 7:59
  Speaker 1: Uh-oh.
• 8:00
  Speaker 3: I'd also like to point out that while losing their
• 8:02
  Speaker 3: mother was a devastating loss, these issues existed long, long
• 8:06
  Speaker 3: before that. By the way, this comes from Funny Monk,
• 8:09
  Speaker 3: and if you want to submit your own stories, go
• 8:11
  Speaker 3: to the r slash okay story time subreddit. I'm Sophia.
• 8:14
  Speaker 1: I'm Keon.
• 8:15
  Speaker 3: And we're here to give good advice goofily, but we
• 8:16
  Speaker 3: don't have all the answers. We only know what we do.
• 8:19
  Speaker 3: So let us know what you would do in the comments.
• 8:20
  Speaker 3: And Opie says, My problem with her began because of
• 8:23
  Speaker 3: the way that she treats her cat.
• 8:26
  Speaker 2: Oh.
• 8:27
  Speaker 3: She will not scoop her cat's litter box or refill
• 8:30
  Speaker 3: her water fountain until you ask multiple times, Do not
• 8:33
  Speaker 3: let this woman.
• 8:34
  Speaker 4: Have a cat.
• 8:35
  Speaker 1: Do not let this woman near any animals.
• 8:37
  Speaker 3: And even then, it's not guaranteed. My boyfriend and I
• 8:40
  Speaker 3: have two cats, so this was an issue that I
• 8:41
  Speaker 3: brought up frequently as I was caring for a cat
• 8:44
  Speaker 3: that wasn't mine. At that point, it's your cat.
• 8:46
  Speaker 1: At this point, you have three cats.
• 8:48
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 8:48
  Speaker 3: It was incredibly frustrating as she claims this cat is
• 8:51
  Speaker 3: her whole world. She'd be broken without this cat.
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: If that's your whole world, oh no.
• 8:56
  Speaker 3: I think her world is broken.
• 8:58
  Speaker 1: I heard, I think her world's crumbling. Is this Pluto?
• 9:01
  Speaker 3: I'd like to note that she's also a nurse, which
• 9:03
  Speaker 3: made this very frustrating. Nothing ever changed. She was an
• 9:06
  Speaker 3: incredibly disrespectful roommate. She would leave moldy Tupperware in the sink,
• 9:11
  Speaker 3: let her food rot in the fridge almost every single week.
• 9:14
  Speaker 3: Her room was always filthy, and when she'd clean it,
• 9:16
  Speaker 3: she would take her moldy cup collection and stack it
• 9:18
  Speaker 3: by the sink, never ever coming back to clean it.
• 9:22
  Speaker 3: I like to recycle, and I clean my recycling. And
• 9:24
  Speaker 3: she would leave dirty plastic food containers on counters or
• 9:27
  Speaker 3: in the sink for me to clean. I would move out.
• 9:30
  Speaker 1: I put it back in her room.
• 9:31
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm putting it back in her room and I'm
• 9:32
  Speaker 3: moving out of this place. Why are we living with
• 9:35
  Speaker 3: your boyfriend's sister who sucks?
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: Who's also really gross. Yeah.
• 9:39
  Speaker 3: I would try to keep communal areas clean and she
• 9:41
  Speaker 3: would cover the couch in her crap. Crafting supplies, blankets,
• 9:45
  Speaker 3: pillows from her room, food wrappers, literally anything. She ruined
• 9:49
  Speaker 3: our coffee table by leaving fast food soda cups on
• 9:51
  Speaker 3: there for so long.
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: Gross.
• 9:53
  Speaker 3: Her boyfriend is an auto body tech and would put
• 9:55
  Speaker 3: his work boots on the couch. Oh my god, I'm... livid.
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: Uh, not allowing that.
• 10:03
  Speaker 3: Mm-mm, mm-mm. Et cetera, et cetera. In terms of a
• 10:06
  Speaker 3: roommate's cleanliness, literally just picture the worst possible scenario. And
• 10:10
  Speaker 3: that's her. I would bring this issue up to my
• 10:12
  Speaker 3: boyfriend and he'd always tell me that she's always been
• 10:14
  Speaker 3: like that. And we can talk about it, but there's
• 10:16
  Speaker 3: no point as nothing will change.
• 10:18
  Speaker 1: Then I break up with my boyfriend.
• 10:20
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 10:21
  Speaker 1: Then I'd be like, you deal with that.
• 10:22
  Speaker 3: Yeah. No, I'd say unless we're moving out, I am
• 10:26
  Speaker 3: not living, you know, I'm not going to be in
• 10:28
  Speaker 3: this relationship.
• 10:29
  Speaker 1: Don't care. That's how she always is. Great. She can change.
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: People can change.
• 10:33
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, like genuinely, I don't even care if
• 10:35
  Speaker 3: she can change.
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: I'm out of there.
• 10:37
  Speaker 3: I'm out of there. Every time we'd bring it up,
• 10:39
  Speaker 3: she would ignore and avoid me for a few days
• 10:41
  Speaker 3: and then go back to her BS. I'd like to
• 10:44
  Speaker 3: note that during this time, I was also pregnant. I'm
• 10:47
  Speaker 3: out of there.
• 10:48
  Speaker 1: What's your boyfriend doing?
• 10:49
  Speaker 3: Oh my God, I'm out of there. I would never
• 10:51
  Speaker 3: have moved in. Oh my goodness. She constantly disrespected me
• 10:55
  Speaker 3: and made my life much, much more difficult. During the
• 10:58
  Speaker 3: course of our lease, there were several times that I
• 11:00
  Speaker 3: would cry because I was so incredibly frustrated. I wonder
• 11:04
  Speaker 3: how they got fleas. Yeah, probably from her. Just her.
• 11:21
  Speaker 3: She wouldn't keep her room clean. Her floor was covered
• 11:24
  Speaker 3: in clothes and she wouldn't comb her cat or give
• 11:26
  Speaker 3: her the pills that I bought. I was trying to
• 11:28
  Speaker 3: get rid of her cat's fleas. Anyway, all that aside,
• 11:31
  Speaker 3: she's also very strange. She's almost possessive of my boyfriend.
• 11:35
  Speaker 3: I'm just going to make a list of weird things
• 11:36
  Speaker 3: she's said or done concerning my boyfriend. When I got pregnant,
• 11:40
  Speaker 3: she kept using I, we, ours when talking about my baby.
• 11:44
  Speaker 1: What the actual F?
• 11:46
  Speaker 3: I'm out of there. I'm out of there. I'm out
• 11:47
  Speaker 3: of there. I'm Staying there.
• 11:49
  Speaker 1: If that's how you treat your cat, I want to
• 11:51
  Speaker 1: know how you're going to treat your future child.
• 11:53
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 11:54
  Speaker 1: Maybe this is mine. This is my child, but your
• 11:56
  Speaker 1: future child.
• 11:57
  Speaker 3: Not ours. Kept doing it so much, even her own
• 12:00
  Speaker 3: boyfriend called it out. She has never once decorated for
• 12:03
  Speaker 3: her brother's birthday. and I decorate for him every year.
• 12:06
  Speaker 3: When my boyfriend's birthday was approaching, kept saying, how should
• 12:09
  Speaker 3: I decorate for his birthday? And telling me her plans.
• 12:13
  Speaker 3: Told me that she can't wait to plan his 30th
• 12:15
  Speaker 3: birthday party. Said that after their mom passes away, she's
• 12:18
  Speaker 3: going to have to take care of my boyfriend.
• 12:20
  Speaker 1: What is going on?
• 12:21
  Speaker 2: What?
• 12:22
  Speaker 1: Go take care of your cat first.
• 12:23
  Speaker 3: Yeah, you can't even manage that.
• 12:25
  Speaker 1: And yourself.
• 12:27
  Speaker 3: Please, take care of your room. Tells me things about
• 12:29
  Speaker 3: his personality as if I don't know. Example is, when
• 12:33
  Speaker 3: he's sad, he turns it into anger. Wow.
• 12:36
  Speaker 1: That's also an issue. What?
• 12:39
  Speaker 3: Okay. We've been together for four years. Why feel the
• 12:42
  Speaker 3: need to tell me basic traits and characteristics? When their
• 12:45
  Speaker 3: mom passed away, my boyfriend and I were already living together.
• 12:49
  Speaker 3: When we were all looking for a place together, she said, well,
• 12:51
  Speaker 3: if we can't find anything, your boyfriend and I will
• 12:54
  Speaker 3: have to share a one bedroom and you'll have to
• 12:55
  Speaker 3: move back home. Sorry, his pregnant girlfriend?
• 12:59
  Speaker 4: Why?
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: I'm telling this to... Why are we not bringing this
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: up to my boyfriend?
• 13:04
  Speaker 3: Yeah, why is boyfriend, like, okay with living with this cretin?
• 13:08
  Speaker 3: Why would the solution be for her and her brother
• 13:10
  Speaker 3: to share a one bed and me to move back
• 13:13
  Speaker 3: home after living with my boyfriend for two years? We've
• 13:16
  Speaker 3: got a little bit left to this story. Any final thoughts?
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: You know what's the worst part? I mean, everything is
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: really bad here, but you know what the worst part
• 13:23
  Speaker 1: is about this? What? The cherry on top? She's a nurse. Yeah. What?
• 13:27
  Speaker 4: She's a nurse.
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: She's a nurse. She's somebody's nurse out there. Ah, you
• 13:33
  Speaker 1: are not my nurse.
• 13:34
  Speaker 3: Yeah, don't touch me.
• 13:35
  Speaker 1: Leave me alone. Talk to your boyfriend. See if you
• 13:38
  Speaker 1: can get her out of there. But the thing is,
• 13:40
  Speaker 1: what is he going to do?
• 13:41
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 13:42
  Speaker 1: He hasn't done anything.
• 13:43
  Speaker 3: I'm just saying I'm moving out. Come with me or not.
• 13:46
  Speaker 3: I'm moving out.
• 13:47
  Speaker 1: It stinks in here.
• 13:48
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I can't stay here.
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: It's not the cats. Maybe it's partially her cat. Maybe
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: it's a little bit the.
• 13:52
  Speaker 3: Cats, but also stinks in here. Anyway, I could honestly
• 13:56
  Speaker 3: keep going, but that is the gist of it. She's
• 13:58
  Speaker 3: overall just kind of wacky and super hypocritical. She yells
• 14:01
  Speaker 3: at her boyfriend for not being more mature when she's
• 14:04
  Speaker 3: a mess. She used to be medically obese and then
• 14:06
  Speaker 3: lost 10 pounds and started saying that nurses shouldn't be
• 14:09
  Speaker 3: allowed to be fat.
• 14:10
  Speaker 1: Dude, what is this? It's not even a human being.
• 14:13
  Speaker 1: What is this person? What is this thing?
• 14:14
  Speaker 3: She's an alien. I don't know. Talking to her makes
• 14:18
  Speaker 3: my head spin, and honestly, I really don't like her. However,
• 14:20
  Speaker 3: this is one of two of my boyfriend's family members,
• 14:23
  Speaker 3: and a small part of me feels bad for never
• 14:25
  Speaker 3: wanting to even see her again. I have spoken to
• 14:28
  Speaker 3: my boyfriend about this several times, and he remains almost
• 14:31
  Speaker 3: neutral about it, which hurts as I feel like he
• 14:34
  Speaker 3: doesn't stand up for me enough. Anyway, this has turned
• 14:36
  Speaker 3: into rambling, but should I just suck it up and
• 14:39
  Speaker 3: deal with her wackiness as this is his family?
• 14:42
  Speaker 2: No. No.
• 14:44
  Speaker 3: You gotta leave or she needs to leave. You probably
• 14:46
  Speaker 3: would be able to handle her better if she didn't
• 14:48
  Speaker 3: live with you.
• 14:50
  Speaker 1: Truly. And I know we don't really like ultimatums here.
• 14:53
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 14:54
  Speaker 1: But this is not an environment for a pregnant woman
• 14:56
  Speaker 1: to be in.
• 14:57
  Speaker 3: Yeah. I don't even think you have to say, like,
• 14:59
  Speaker 3: I'm breaking up with you. It can just be, I
• 15:01
  Speaker 3: need to move out. I would like you to come
• 15:03
  Speaker 3: with me. If you want to stay here and take
• 15:06
  Speaker 3: care of your sister, then so be it.
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: It's just, I know it's going to be really hard because...
• 15:11
  Speaker 1: He only has so many family members. Yeah. So I
• 15:13
  Speaker 1: feel like you could feel guilty.
• 15:14
  Speaker 3: But you could probably have a better freaking relationship with
• 15:17
  Speaker 3: her if you didn't live with her.
• 15:19
  Speaker 1: I don't think he cares.
• 15:20
  Speaker 3: Yeah, no, he doesn't. You got an edit, though. His
• 15:22
  Speaker 3: sister did move last week.
• 15:25
  Speaker 1: Oh. Thank the heavens.
• 15:27
  Speaker 2: Awesome.
• 15:27
  Speaker 3: That was an important part that I left out.
• 15:29
  Speaker 1: How did that happen? I don't know. What caused her
• 15:31
  Speaker 1: to move?
• 15:32
  Speaker 3: I'm happy that she's gone, but I still don't want
• 15:34
  Speaker 3: to see her or interact. And that is the end.
• 15:37
  Speaker 1: You don't give us a reasoning why? Yeah.
• 15:39
  Speaker 3: I mean, did your boyfriend say, hey, she's got to go?
• 15:42
  Speaker 3: Did she want to leave? What was the, what happened?
• 15:45
  Speaker 1: What was the root of that? No matter what. Great.
• 15:48
  Speaker 1: She's out. So much stress is gone. Yeah. Your boyfriend
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: needs to figure things out and he needs to figure
• 15:53
  Speaker 1: it out quick, especially for you.
• 15:56
  Speaker 3: And I guess the, you know, OP's question now is
• 15:59
  Speaker 3: now that she's gone, I still don't want to have
• 16:02
  Speaker 3: her in my life. Is that OK? And I think
• 16:04
  Speaker 3: you could limit your relationship. Doesn't mean that your boyfriend
• 16:07
  Speaker 3: has to.
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I think that's totally fine. Like, hey, no more
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: in her in my life, in your life. OK, our life.
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: That's no.
• 16:14
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: And that's the end of this story. We're going to
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: go on to the next one. I jokingly gave my
• 16:19
  Speaker 1: girlfriend a celebrity hall pass, so she actually used it.
• 16:23
  Speaker 3: Dang, she's got game.
• 16:26
  Speaker 1: I've, 29 male, been with my girlfriend, 28 female, for
• 16:29
  Speaker 1: three years. She's a huge fan of a popular sci-fi series,
• 16:32
  Speaker 1: and her friends are even more obsessed with it. Any guesses?
• 16:37
  Speaker 3: Sci-fi. Current sci-fi, I'm thinking, like, Doctor Who. Okay. I'm thinking...
• 16:45
  Speaker 3: Supernatural's not really sci-fi.
• 16:47
  Speaker 1: It's in the elements.
• 16:48
  Speaker 3: That's more fiction fantasy, I would say.
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: It's more fantasy, yeah.
• 16:52
  Speaker 3: What's another sci-fi?
• 16:54
  Speaker 1: Look at me. Star Trek. Star Wars.
• 16:57
  Speaker 3: Oh, there's the new Star Trek show.
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: Star Trek and Star Wars were the ones that came
• 17:01
  Speaker 1: to mind.
• 17:02
  Speaker 3: And there's a new spin-off Star Trek.
• 17:04
  Speaker 1: Yes, yes. Um.
• 17:07
  Speaker 1: Let's see if it's any of those.
• 17:09
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 17:09
  Speaker 1: Those are the big three.
• 17:09
  Speaker 3: I feel like they're not going to tell us.
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: The big three is always Doctor Who.
• 17:13
  Speaker 3: Yeah. I'm thinking of stuff that's still running.
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: Yeah, like modern day.
• 17:16
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 17:16
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah. Let's see. Put your guesses in the comments.
• 17:19
  Speaker 3: Oh, boy.
• 17:20
  Speaker 1: I've always supported her interest. I watched a few episodes
• 17:22
  Speaker 1: with her when she wanted me to. Even though half
• 17:24
  Speaker 1: the time I had no idea what was going on.
• 17:27
  Speaker 1: This is me with Carly when watching Glee. Honestly, I
• 17:31
  Speaker 1: just like seeing her happy and excited about it. About
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: two years ago, we had a group of friends over
• 17:35
  Speaker 1: for a game night one evening, and they all were
• 17:37
  Speaker 1: jokingly about which cast members they fancied.
• 17:39
  Speaker 3: Okay, British sci-fi.
• 17:41
  Speaker 2: Doctor Who.
• 17:43
  Speaker 1: But it's still getting Star Wars, Star Trek. Those are
• 17:45
  Speaker 1: like the two biggest ones.
• 17:46
  Speaker 3: It could be, it could be, yeah.
• 17:47
  Speaker 1: My girlfriend's top pick was one particular actor who plays
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: a very iconic character in the show.
• 17:53
  Speaker 3: Matt Smith.
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: I even knew who the character was, even though I'm
• 17:56
  Speaker 1: not really into the show. And I'll admit, the guy
• 17:59
  Speaker 1: is attractive. I have eyes, after all.
• 18:02
  Speaker 5: Okay.
• 18:03
  Speaker 1: Opie's funny.
• 18:04
  Speaker 3: Okay.
• 18:05
  Speaker 1: At some point, she jokingly asked if she could have
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: a hall pass for him.
• 18:08
  Speaker 3: Who is it?
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: I need to know!
• 18:10
  Speaker 3: Tell me!
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: We need to know! Since this was clearly a ridiculous
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: hypothetical that would never happen, I laughed and said, yes!
• 18:18
  Speaker 1: Then thought nothing more of it. By the way, this
• 18:21
  Speaker 1: comes from user IHateThatShow... F my life. And if you
• 18:25
  Speaker 1: want to submit your own stories, go to the r slash. Okay.
• 18:27
  Speaker 1: Storytime subreddit. I'm Keon.
• 18:28
  Speaker 3: I'm Sophia.
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: And we're here to give good advice. Goofily. That's all
• 18:32
  Speaker 1: we know. We only know goofy things.
• 18:34
  Speaker 3: There's also stranger things.
• 18:36
  Speaker 1: That's like fantasy sci-fi.
• 18:38
  Speaker 3: That's true. That's true. Fair.
• 18:40
  Speaker 1: Let us know what you do in the comments down
• 18:41
  Speaker 1: below and what you think.
• 18:42
  Speaker 3: Let us know what you think the show is.
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: Because we're really on that right now.
• 18:45
  Speaker 3: We're trying to figure it out.
• 18:46
  Speaker 1: As OP says, fast forward about four months, December 2024.
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: So it's a modern show.
• 18:52
  Speaker 3: Okay. We know it's a modern show because they said
• 18:54
  Speaker 3: that they've been watching. It's like probably a younger actor.
• 18:58
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah. Or their age. Yeah, of, yeah. My girlfriend
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: and her friends went to a convention overseas where this
• 19:04
  Speaker 1: actor and several others from the show were appearing.
• 19:07
  Speaker 3: Okay, big show, big show.
• 19:08
  Speaker 1: Big show. She invited me, but it was abroad. Who
• 19:11
  Speaker 1: was she? And I couldn't get the time off work.
• 19:13
  Speaker 1: That's what we're trying to figure out. All seemed to
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: go well for her, and I was genuinely happy. She
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: had such a fun experience. Then, uh-oh, a couple of
• 19:20
  Speaker 1: weeks ago, her friend group had a falling out. What?
• 19:24
  Speaker 1: One of her friends reached out to me and told
• 19:25
  Speaker 1: me my girlfriend had used her hall pass in Germany.
• 19:29
  Speaker 4: In Germany.
• 19:30
  Speaker 3: Okay, okay, okay. Germany Convention Center 2024.
• 19:34
  Speaker 1: The Mandalorian, Pedro Pascal.
• 19:37
  Speaker 3: Oh, that's a good one.
• 19:39
  Speaker 1: At first, I honestly thought it was a sick joke.
• 19:41
  Speaker 1: I didn't believe it. But when I confronted my girlfriend,
• 19:44
  Speaker 1: she admitted it without even trying to deny it. She
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: slept with said hall pass. Ooh.
• 19:50
  Speaker 3: And that's when I go, Curly Pop, a hall pass
• 19:53
  Speaker 3: is a joke.
• 19:55
  Speaker 1: To some people, it's not.
• 19:58
  Speaker 3: The correct way to approach a hall pass, if you
• 20:01
  Speaker 3: have that in your relationship, you call your partner and
• 20:04
  Speaker 3: you say, I have the opportunity to enact upon my
• 20:08
  Speaker 3: hall pass. Yes or no?
• 20:09
  Speaker 1: OP just said, yeah, if you ever encounter this and
• 20:12
  Speaker 1: you have the opportunity, You got the good.
• 20:15
  Speaker 3: But that's like a joke thing that people say.
• 20:17
  Speaker 1: Some people take that as not a joke.
• 20:19
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 20:20
  Speaker 3: I think that's stupid of the girlfriend if she just
• 20:22
  Speaker 3: was like, it's not a joke. You said. That's ridiculous.
• 20:26
  Speaker 1: According to her, she met the actor during an autograph
• 20:29
  Speaker 1: session at the convention. Later that evening, she and her
• 20:32
  Speaker 1: friends saw him at the hotel bar and approached him.
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: They all ended up hanging out, going to a few
• 20:36
  Speaker 1: bars together, and eventually my girlfriend and this actor were alone.
• 20:41
  Speaker 1: They kissed. Then, later that night, she left her hotel
• 20:45
  Speaker 1: room and went to his, where they slept together.
• 20:47
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that's, yeah, I'm breaking up. Sorry.
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: As I was listening to this, I felt like I
• 20:52
  Speaker 1: had been one-two'd in the stomach. The worst part is
• 20:56
  Speaker 1: that she genuinely seems to believe she didn't do anything wrong.
• 21:00
  Speaker 3: She's dumb.
• 21:00
  Speaker 1: Because I had technically given her a hall pass.
• 21:03
  Speaker 3: Yeah, and I'm breaking up now because she's stupid. Also,
• 21:08
  Speaker 3: I looked it up. Star Wars and Star Trek were
• 21:11
  Speaker 3: the most popular at this convention. So it's one of those.
• 21:16
  Speaker 1: Listen, you're fantasy. I'm more sci-fi.
• 21:18
  Speaker 3: No, I believed you.
• 21:19
  Speaker 1: Oh, I know. It's one of those news shows. She
• 21:24
  Speaker 1: admits she should have mentioned it sooner, but she's acting
• 21:27
  Speaker 1: like the only real mistake was not telling me immediately.
• 21:30
  Speaker 3: I mean, that's one of many.
• 21:32
  Speaker 1: She said she wants to be transparent now that it's out.
• 21:35
  Speaker 1: And she even showed me photos that back up the story.
• 21:38
  Speaker 1: What kind of photos?
• 21:39
  Speaker 3: She's like, here's me kissing him.
• 21:41
  Speaker 1: Here's me in his bed.
• 21:42
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 21:42
  Speaker 1: So it actually happened. No, she definitely did that because
• 21:45
  Speaker 1: she's like, this is my dream person.
• 21:49
  Speaker 3: She's obsessed with him.
• 21:51
  Speaker 1: Which, Opie says, I really didn't need to effing see.
• 21:54
  Speaker 3: Fair.
• 21:55
  Speaker 1: I feel sick. I hate that show now. I hate
• 21:58
  Speaker 1: that dumb B-list pretty boy actor. Oh, man.
• 22:01
  Speaker 3: Who is this?
• 22:02
  Speaker 2: Who is it?
• 22:03
  Speaker 3: Who is it?
• 22:04
  Speaker 1: But I still love my girlfriend and that makes me
• 22:06
  Speaker 1: feel like an idiot. Part of me wants to salvage this,
• 22:09
  Speaker 1: but she's literally planning on going to Vegas where he
• 22:12
  Speaker 1: and all the other actors are going to be next month.
• 22:15
  Speaker 3: Oh my goodness. Did he invite her?
• 22:16
  Speaker 1: 100%. I asked her to not go, but she spent
• 22:20
  Speaker 1: so much non-refundable money on this, she said I could
• 22:23
  Speaker 1: come along and she'd even pay for me. She offered
• 22:25
  Speaker 1: to introduce me to the guy to prove it's harmless,
• 22:28
  Speaker 1: or I can have a hall pass from the show myself.
• 22:31
  Speaker 1: Am I overreacting for still feeling like this was cheating?
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: Even though I jokingly agreed to the hall pass months before?
• 22:37
  Speaker 1: We have an update.
• 22:38
  Speaker 3: I'm so sorry, OP. She full cheated on you.
• 22:41
  Speaker 4: She, I mean.
• 22:41
  Speaker 3: She full cheated on you.
• 22:43
  Speaker 2: But.
• 22:44
  Speaker 3: Even in scenarios where we have relationships that are poly,
• 22:49
  Speaker 3: I would still consider this cheating because there was no communication. Yeah.
• 22:53
  Speaker 1: She should have definitely be like, hey. It's happening, but
• 22:57
  Speaker 1: before it actually happens, like... Checking in. Yeah. Do I
• 23:01
  Speaker 1: get the hall pass? OP, you should have never said
• 23:04
  Speaker 1: it in the first place.
• 23:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I mean, I don't know.
• 23:07
  Speaker 3: I think I've, like, I've probably made that joke with
• 23:09
  Speaker 3: my boyfriend.
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: But your boyfriend probably understands you.
• 23:12
  Speaker 3: Yeah, and vice versa. I feel like we've both been like, oh,
• 23:14
  Speaker 3: my God, yeah, that person.
• 23:16
  Speaker 1: But, like, I feel like OP's girlfriend is so infatuated
• 23:21
  Speaker 1: by that actor that, like, I don't think she needed the...
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: have them. Yeah, I don't think she needed the okay
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: go or like the green light. She's like, I'm taking
• 23:30
  Speaker 1: that opportunity no matter what.
• 23:31
  Speaker 3: I don't think she cared. The fact that she hid
• 23:34
  Speaker 3: it from you, I think shows that she knows at
• 23:37
  Speaker 3: some part of herself that it was wrong.
• 23:39
  Speaker 1: You probably went, sure, you can have a hall pass.
• 23:42
  Speaker 1: The fact that she didn't bring one up for you either.
• 23:45
  Speaker 1: She was like, good, great. That's all I needed. I
• 23:46
  Speaker 1: got the, I got the, he said yes.
• 23:49
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 23:49
  Speaker 1: We have an update. Who is it?
• 23:51
  Speaker 3: Who is it?
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: I've taken everything into account. I still feel sick to
• 23:55
  Speaker 1: my stomach, but I know I was being an idiot
• 23:57
  Speaker 1: and making excuses.
• 23:58
  Speaker 3: What?
• 23:59
  Speaker 1: Being in love with someone isn't easy. And I was
• 24:00
  Speaker 1: stupidly trying to hold onto anything. Even though I said
• 24:03
  Speaker 1: yes initially, looking back, I truly can't see how it
• 24:06
  Speaker 1: was anything other than a joke. And not only that
• 24:09
  Speaker 1: she should have clarified when it was actually going to happen.
• 24:12
  Speaker 2: Hmm.
• 24:13
  Speaker 1: Plus, since it's all come out, my feelings have clearly
• 24:16
  Speaker 1: been disregarded.
• 24:17
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 24:17
  Speaker 1: I know what I have to do, but that doesn't
• 24:19
  Speaker 1: make it any easier. I hope you continue saying, I've
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: had so many messages asking who the man is. Yes.
• 24:27
  Speaker 1: And we are on that same boat. He's from Star Trek,
• 24:30
  Speaker 1: so give me my flowers.
• 24:33
  Speaker 3: You said Star Wars.
• 24:35
  Speaker 1: No, I said Star Wars, Star Trek.
• 24:36
  Speaker 3: Yeah. Well, I think that he's from Starfleet Academy because
• 24:39
  Speaker 3: that whole cast is pretty attractive.
• 24:42
  Speaker 1: Let's be honest. OP's probably not going to put that
• 24:44
  Speaker 1: man's name out there just because to cover face.
• 24:46
  Speaker 3: No, they'd be like, hey, you're freaking blah, blah, blah.
• 24:50
  Speaker 1: But OP continues saying, I hate that show now and
• 24:53
  Speaker 1: I hope it gets canceled forever.
• 24:55
  Speaker 3: Mm-hmm.
• 24:55
  Speaker 1: I'm never dating anyone again who likes it.
• 24:57
  Speaker 2: LOL.
• 24:58
  Speaker 1: Nah, don't do that. Come on. I also didn't know
• 25:00
  Speaker 1: the man was dating someone. F him too. Oh. Unless
• 25:05
  Speaker 1: if they are like open.
• 25:07
  Speaker 3: Caleb mirror relationship.
• 25:10
  Speaker 1: Opie continues saying, a lot of people have commented I
• 25:13
  Speaker 1: should use my hall pass in a way to screw
• 25:15
  Speaker 1: her over. As funny as that would be, I don't
• 25:18
  Speaker 1: want to sink to those levels.
• 25:19
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 25:20
  Speaker 1: It's the eye for an eye thing and everyone becomes blind. Yeah. Yeah.
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: And Opie's distraught and upset. That is the end of
• 25:27
  Speaker 1: that story.
• 25:28
  Speaker 3: Oh, wow.
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: I'm sorry, Opie. I'm sorry that you found this out.
• 25:33
  Speaker 1: And this was found out through his ex's, or soon-to-be
• 25:37
  Speaker 1: ex's friend. Because they even knew that was messed up. Yeah.
• 25:40
  Speaker 3: Oh, your girlfriend stinks, but at least she has her
• 25:43
  Speaker 3: Star Trek lover now. I hope it was worth it.
• 25:47
  Speaker 1: All you say to your girlfriend or your ex-girlfriend is,
• 25:50
  Speaker 1: live long and prosper.
• 25:51
  Speaker 3: Live long and prosper.
• 25:53
  Speaker 1: And that's the end of this story. We're going to
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: go on to the next one. Hey, it's Keon, the
• 25:58
  Speaker 1: silliest goose. We're going to get back to the stories,
• 26:01
  Speaker 1: but here's three minutes of ads from our sponsors.
• 26:04
  Speaker 2: My girlfriend paid a stranger to flirt with me as
• 26:08
  Speaker 2: a loyalty test.
• 26:09
  Speaker 3: Stop.
• 26:11
  Speaker 2: And there is a trigger warning for mentions of previously
• 26:13
  Speaker 2: harmful exes. My girlfriend, 22, female, and I, 25, male,
• 26:17
  Speaker 2: have known each other for 10 years now. I met
• 26:19
  Speaker 2: her through her brother, who is still one of my
• 26:21
  Speaker 2: best friends, when I was 15 and she was 12.
• 26:25
  Speaker 2: Over the years, we became really close friends, but we
• 26:27
  Speaker 2: were never interested in each other dating-wise until last year
• 26:31
  Speaker 2: after we hooked up at a party and we decided
• 26:33
  Speaker 2: we would give it a try. Give it the old
• 26:35
  Speaker 2: college try. Things were going great. I really saw myself
• 26:38
  Speaker 2: building a future with her, but over the years, A
• 26:41
  Speaker 2: couple of things happened that started giving me doubts about us. Uh-oh.
• 26:44
  Speaker 2: By the way, this comes from Trust Issues Guy. And
• 26:48
  Speaker 2: if you want to submit your own stories, go to
• 26:50
  Speaker 2: the r slash OK Storytime subreddit.
• 26:51
  Speaker 4: I'm Dakota.
• 26:52
  Speaker 3: I'm Sophia.
• 26:53
  Speaker 2: And we're going to read this story and give our
• 26:55
  Speaker 2: thoughts and our little goofy advices, but just know we
• 26:57
  Speaker 2: don't know everything. But if you know things, put them
• 26:59
  Speaker 2: in the comments where we can read them.
• 27:01
  Speaker 4: Please.
• 27:03
  Speaker 2: And OP says, Incident 1. Seven months in, we go
• 27:07
  Speaker 2: out for a weekend holiday with a couple of our friends...
• 27:10
  Speaker 2: Two girls and a guy. There, she decides she doesn't
• 27:14
  Speaker 2: want to share a room with me, but wants to
• 27:16
  Speaker 2: share one with her girls, and I should room with
• 27:19
  Speaker 2: my friend.
• 27:20
  Speaker 3: That's immediately weird.
• 27:22
  Speaker 2: She's just, she's for the girls, dude.
• 27:24
  Speaker 3: She's like, it's girls time. If I'm on a trip
• 27:28
  Speaker 3: with my boyfriend plus friends, I'm not not going to
• 27:31
  Speaker 3: be in the same room with my boyfriend.
• 27:33
  Speaker 2: Well, it gets worse, Sophia.
• 27:35
  Speaker 3: Oh, no.
• 27:36
  Speaker 2: She then proceeds to tell everyone we met that we're
• 27:40
  Speaker 2: just F buddies. We're just bang buddies. And she's single.
• 27:44
  Speaker 2: This really pisses me off. But I didn't want to
• 27:46
  Speaker 2: ruin the mood. So I talked about it with her
• 27:48
  Speaker 2: later that night. I ask her why she was telling
• 27:51
  Speaker 2: those things to people when we had been dating for
• 27:53
  Speaker 2: seven months, and she tells me because that's what we are,
• 27:56
  Speaker 2: we're just having a bit of fun.
• 27:58
  Speaker 3: Oh, and I'm immediately cutting that off. I go, oh, okay, bye.
• 28:04
  Speaker 2: Conspiracy theory.
• 28:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 28:05
  Speaker 2: She's just doing this because you're her brother's best friend.
• 28:10
  Speaker 3: Doing what?
• 28:10
  Speaker 2: She's saying this because she doesn't want it to be
• 28:12
  Speaker 2: weird that she's dating her older brother's friend. That's my
• 28:16
  Speaker 2: conspiracy theory. That's why she's being, that's why she's moving weird.
• 28:20
  Speaker 3: I don't know.
• 28:20
  Speaker 2: This is because she thinks it's weird. We go back
• 28:23
  Speaker 2: and forth until I get mad and my buddy suggests
• 28:25
  Speaker 2: we go home. When we're packing our bags, I hear
• 28:28
  Speaker 2: my girlfriend crying upstairs to her friends. And when I'm
• 28:30
  Speaker 2: about to leave, she comes downstairs and asks if I
• 28:33
  Speaker 2: want to talk. She tells me about her ex-boyfriend and
• 28:37
  Speaker 2: how he was harmful and that because of him, she's
• 28:40
  Speaker 2: afraid to let someone get close to her. Looks like
• 28:43
  Speaker 2: I was not on the money with my take. This
• 28:46
  Speaker 2: hit me like a ton of bricks.
• 28:47
  Speaker 3: Why?
• 28:47
  Speaker 2: I understood why she would be careful letting someone get close.
• 28:51
  Speaker 2: We talked it out and I decided to stay for
• 28:53
  Speaker 2: the rest of the weekend and we had a really
• 28:55
  Speaker 2: good time. Incident two, 10 months in.
• 28:57
  Speaker 3: I don't know. I'm breaking up after the first incident.
• 29:00
  Speaker 3: The second that my partner goes around, starts telling people
• 29:03
  Speaker 3: in front of me, oh yeah, that's just my F buddy.
• 29:06
  Speaker 3: I'm single.
• 29:07
  Speaker 2: I think given the context and the fact that it
• 29:10
  Speaker 2: was in front of you and not behind your back.
• 29:13
  Speaker 2: That you know of. If it was behind my back,
• 29:16
  Speaker 2: different vibe. But also, yes, that I know of.
• 29:18
  Speaker 1: Mm-hmm.
• 29:19
  Speaker 2: But given the context, I would be like, okay, I
• 29:22
  Speaker 2: can forgive this.
• 29:23
  Speaker 3: You get one strike.
• 29:24
  Speaker 2: For that, yeah. We're driving, and she noticed my ex-girlfriend
• 29:29
  Speaker 2: from three years ago started following me on Twitter. I
• 29:31
  Speaker 2: tell her how my ex sent me a message asking
• 29:34
  Speaker 2: how I was doing, and we had a short, friendly conversation.
• 29:36
  Speaker 2: My girlfriend gets mad and asks me what I'm up to, and...
• 29:40
  Speaker 2: my ex.
• 29:40
  Speaker 3: Oh gosh.
• 29:41
  Speaker 2: I tell her it's nothing. I even tell her to
• 29:44
  Speaker 2: look at the messages. This isn't enough. And it gets
• 29:47
  Speaker 2: to the point where she tells me to pull over
• 29:49
  Speaker 2: and calls her friend to pick her up. And that's
• 29:52
  Speaker 2: the last time you deal with that.
• 29:55
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm done. I'm over. I'm like, okay, I cannot
• 29:58
  Speaker 3: handle your moods. I cannot handle your insecurities.
• 30:02
  Speaker 2: Yes, no matter how justified your mistrust of me or
• 30:05
  Speaker 2: your insecurities in this relationship are, they are not things
• 30:08
  Speaker 2: I would like to deal with.
• 30:10
  Speaker 5: Nope.
• 30:10
  Speaker 3: No, thank you.
• 30:11
  Speaker 2: I wait until her friend picks her up and then
• 30:14
  Speaker 2: drive home. When she comes home, she immediately apologizes about
• 30:17
  Speaker 2: how she acted, how I never gave her a reason
• 30:20
  Speaker 2: to not trust me, and how she's insecure because of
• 30:23
  Speaker 2: her ex.
• 30:24
  Speaker 3: Yeah, like at a certain point, you can't use that
• 30:26
  Speaker 3: excuse anymore. Mm-hmm.
• 30:27
  Speaker 1: It's true.
• 30:28
  Speaker 2: I tell her it's fine. Until a couple of nights later,
• 30:31
  Speaker 2: she has a little too much to drink and completely
• 30:33
  Speaker 2: breaks down. She talks about how she's such a terrible
• 30:36
  Speaker 2: girlfriend and how I deserve better and I should be
• 30:38
  Speaker 2: with my ex and how she'll never really trust anyone.
• 30:41
  Speaker 2: I try to cheer her up and eventually she starts
• 30:44
  Speaker 2: believing me and falls asleep.
• 30:45
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 30:46
  Speaker 2: Incident number three, 14 months in, which was yesterday. We
• 30:49
  Speaker 2: had plans with one of her friends, but I get
• 30:52
  Speaker 2: a call that she has to work late and that
• 30:54
  Speaker 2: I should meet her friend at the bar.
• 30:56
  Speaker 1: No.
• 30:57
  Speaker 3: Like immediately I'm like, no, let's reschedule.
• 30:59
  Speaker 2: I mean, if I'm friends with this friend, I'm like, okay, sure.
• 31:02
  Speaker 3: If I'm friends with them on my own, right? But
• 31:05
  Speaker 3: if I'm like friends through my partner, then I'm saying,
• 31:09
  Speaker 3: let's just reschedule. Yeah.
• 31:10
  Speaker 2: It's like, I'll wait. No big deal.
• 31:12
  Speaker 3: No rush.
• 31:13
  Speaker 2: When her friend goes to the bathroom, I get approached
• 31:16
  Speaker 2: by a woman asking me if the person I'm with
• 31:19
  Speaker 2: is my girlfriend. I tell her, no, she's just a friend.
• 31:22
  Speaker 2: She then asks if she could buy me a drink.
• 31:25
  Speaker 2: I tell her, no, thank you. I already have one.
• 31:28
  Speaker 2: She then asks if she could give me her number
• 31:30
  Speaker 2: so we could hang out later. I told her, no,
• 31:33
  Speaker 2: I have a girlfriend and I'm not interested. Out comes
• 31:36
  Speaker 2: my girlfriend with a huge smile on her face telling
• 31:38
  Speaker 2: me I passed the test.
• 31:40
  Speaker 3: Oh, that's so funny. I don't have a girlfriend anymore.
• 31:42
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 31:43
  Speaker 2: And now she can trust me. Well, you can trust
• 31:45
  Speaker 2: that I'm leaving.
• 31:46
  Speaker 3: Yeah. No, I literally, in that moment, I would turn
• 31:50
  Speaker 3: to the woman that performed the test and say, oh,
• 31:53
  Speaker 3: it's so funny. I actually am single now.
• 31:56
  Speaker 2: I just recently found out I'm single and I would
• 31:59
  Speaker 2: love to take you up on that drink.
• 32:01
  Speaker 3: And then you walk away from this girl.
• 32:02
  Speaker 2: She paid this woman $ 50 to flirt with me to
• 32:07
  Speaker 2: see what I would do.
• 32:08
  Speaker 3: Oh my God.
• 32:09
  Speaker 2: It turns out it was her friend's idea.
• 32:11
  Speaker 4: Yikes.
• 32:12
  Speaker 2: And she had done this to one of her ex-boyfriends.
• 32:14
  Speaker 3: Oh, and how did that go? Yeah.
• 32:16
  Speaker 2: Note that that says... ex-boyfriend i get upset that she
• 32:21
  Speaker 2: still doesn't trust me after 14 months mind you and
• 32:25
  Speaker 2: i'm done she starts crying telling me she's sorry but
• 32:28
  Speaker 2: i tell her i can't deal with it anymore yeah agreed.
• 32:31
  Speaker 3: Brother agreed oh yeah big time agree this.
• 32:34
  Speaker 2: Is like the ultimate like bro walk i'm walking away i.
• 32:38
  Speaker 3: Walked after the first time i walked when she called
• 32:42
  Speaker 3: me an f buddy after seven months of dating.
• 32:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah, wise, wise decision. I don't want to talk to
• 32:48
  Speaker 2: her until I've thought about our relationship and I suggest
• 32:51
  Speaker 2: she should do the same. That's where I'm at right now.
• 32:53
  Speaker 2: She called me once today and I didn't pick up.
• 32:55
  Speaker 2: She left a message about how sorry she was and
• 32:57
  Speaker 2: how she really loves me and that it was stupid
• 32:59
  Speaker 2: for her to try and test me. I really hope
• 33:01
  Speaker 2: you guys have some advice for me.
• 33:02
  Speaker 4: Yep.
• 33:03
  Speaker 2: Break up. It's time to walk a thousand miles to Africa.
• 33:07
  Speaker 2: You're done.
• 33:07
  Speaker 3: You're done. Your relationship is over. It's been over for months.
• 33:11
  Speaker 2: And you say, I hope that this teaches you how
• 33:14
  Speaker 2: to be. And that you can't be this way. I'm not.
• 33:17
  Speaker 2: I can't. I can't do this.
• 33:18
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 33:19
  Speaker 2: Because when's the next test?
• 33:20
  Speaker 3: You can't just keep blaming your ex.
• 33:23
  Speaker 2: Every single thing that happens to me forever now is
• 33:25
  Speaker 2: going to be, is this a test? Is this a test?
• 33:27
  Speaker 2: Am I being tested?
• 33:28
  Speaker 3: Because it's almost in the same vein to me as
• 33:32
  Speaker 3: if your partner is still in love with their ex.
• 33:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah. It's like the opposite side of the coin.
• 33:37
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 33:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 33:39
  Speaker 2: That's a good one.
• 33:39
  Speaker 4: Well, we do have an update.
• 33:41
  Speaker 3: Oh, boy.
• 33:41
  Speaker 4: I really.
• 33:43
  Speaker 2: I really just hope it ends in the best possible
• 33:46
  Speaker 2: situation for everybody here.
• 33:47
  Speaker 5: Please, please.
• 33:49
  Speaker 2: Today, I got a call from my girlfriend's brother.
• 33:51
  Speaker 3: Oh, yep.
• 33:53
  Speaker 2: Forgot he was a player. One of my best friends.
• 33:55
  Speaker 2: He asks if he can come over and have a
• 33:58
  Speaker 2: talk with me about what happened. Girlfriend told him what
• 34:01
  Speaker 2: happened at the bar, and I was glad he saw
• 34:03
  Speaker 2: why I was mad. He thought what his sister did
• 34:06
  Speaker 2: was not cool. Especially 14 months into a relationship. But
• 34:09
  Speaker 2: he asked me if it was worth throwing away what
• 34:12
  Speaker 2: I had with my girlfriend over a stupid mistake.
• 34:14
  Speaker 3: And then you get to tell him, oh, she told
• 34:17
  Speaker 3: you it was one mistake? There was a lot.
• 34:19
  Speaker 2: It's been a series. I told him it wasn't the
• 34:22
  Speaker 2: only thing that bothered me. And told him about the
• 34:25
  Speaker 2: other incidents, which he did not know about. He then
• 34:28
  Speaker 2: started telling me the same story girlfriend keeps telling me
• 34:31
  Speaker 2: when she lashes out at me. The harmful ex- Trouble
• 34:34
  Speaker 2: trusting people.
• 34:35
  Speaker 3: For 14 months?
• 34:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I mean, I get it. But at some point.
• 34:39
  Speaker 3: At some point, you have to realize that you're not
• 34:42
  Speaker 3: ready for a relationship. Yeah.
• 34:44
  Speaker 2: You know?
• 34:45
  Speaker 3: Yes.
• 34:46
  Speaker 2: I tell him I've heard it all before. And at
• 34:49
  Speaker 2: this point, I don't believe she's ready to date someone
• 34:51
  Speaker 2: long term. Yep. And she should get help.
• 34:54
  Speaker 3: Yep.
• 34:54
  Speaker 2: He tells me that he knows she really loves me
• 34:57
  Speaker 2: and should get help. But if I bail on her now,
• 35:00
  Speaker 2: she'll never get better at trusting people. He wants me
• 35:02
  Speaker 2: to help her get better. You cannot be responsible for that.
• 35:07
  Speaker 3: Oh, that is not your responsibility at all.
• 35:11
  Speaker 2: If you break up with her, you'll never be able
• 35:13
  Speaker 2: to fix her.
• 35:13
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 35:14
  Speaker 2: What? Nah.
• 35:15
  Speaker 3: No, I turn to him and say, oh, so you
• 35:17
  Speaker 3: think a man will fix all of her problems? You
• 35:20
  Speaker 3: think a relationship will fix all of her problems? It
• 35:23
  Speaker 3: hasn't worked in a year. We've been together for a
• 35:25
  Speaker 3: year and it has not worked.
• 35:27
  Speaker 2: He then straight up asks me if I want to
• 35:30
  Speaker 2: break up with her. And I tell him I don't know,
• 35:33
  Speaker 2: but it cannot go on this way. He tells me
• 35:35
  Speaker 2: he would like it if we tried to make it work,
• 35:37
  Speaker 2: but he can't make that choice for me.
• 35:39
  Speaker 3: Yeah, no, you can't. Leave me alone.
• 35:40
  Speaker 2: There's a second update.
• 35:42
  Speaker 3: Stop getting involved in my relationship. That's the problem, though,
• 35:44
  Speaker 3: when you date your bro's sisters.
• 35:47
  Speaker 2: He's looking out for his sister and he's trying to
• 35:49
  Speaker 2: look out for you.
• 35:50
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 35:51
  Speaker 2: Because to be honest. Three incidents in 14 months is
• 35:56
  Speaker 2: not a lot of incidents.
• 35:57
  Speaker 3: But they were pretty awful incidents.
• 35:59
  Speaker 2: They've all been about the same thing, though.
• 36:02
  Speaker 3: Yes, about a lack of trust.
• 36:04
  Speaker 2: Update two. I met up with my girlfriend to have
• 36:06
  Speaker 2: a talk about what happened at the bar. She wanted
• 36:09
  Speaker 2: to meet at my place, but I preferred somewhere more neutral.
• 36:13
  Speaker 2: Update two. I met up with my girlfriend to have
• 36:15
  Speaker 2: a talk about what happened at the bar. She wanted
• 36:17
  Speaker 2: to meet at my place, but I preferred somewhere more neutral.
• 36:21
  Speaker 2: She apologized for testing me. She told me she was
• 36:24
  Speaker 2: going to get help dealing with her trust issues and
• 36:26
  Speaker 2: really wants to get better. She still really loves me
• 36:29
  Speaker 2: and hopes I'll support her, preferably as her boyfriend. But
• 36:32
  Speaker 2: at this point, she'll take us being friends. I told
• 36:35
  Speaker 2: her I was happy she's getting help, but I can't
• 36:37
  Speaker 2: stay in this relationship just because of promises. I needed
• 36:41
  Speaker 2: actions from her. She basically told me it wasn't an
• 36:43
  Speaker 2: empty promise, that she realizes she needs to learn to
• 36:46
  Speaker 2: trust people because even if I walk, nothing gets fixed.
• 36:50
  Speaker 2: She asked me to please give her one last chance. No.
• 36:53
  Speaker 3: We're at three strikes. We're at, she did a test.
• 36:56
  Speaker 3: She tested you. She paid someone $ 50.
• 36:59
  Speaker 2: I don't think building something as fundamental as like the
• 37:03
  Speaker 2: ability to trust your partner is something you can do
• 37:07
  Speaker 2: while you're in a relationship with someone. I think you
• 37:10
  Speaker 2: need to be at zero and be with yourself.
• 37:12
  Speaker 3: Yeah, because she's working from like, This is like base level.
• 37:16
  Speaker 3: She's down here and she's trying like you want to
• 37:19
  Speaker 3: be maybe here with your partner. She's trying to get
• 37:21
  Speaker 3: from here to here. Just go get to here, girly pop.
• 37:25
  Speaker 2: Yeah, let's go.
• 37:26
  Speaker 3: Let's not go on hard mode.
• 37:27
  Speaker 2: I told her I'd give her one last chance. But
• 37:32
  Speaker 2: it would have to be terms because I can't keep
• 37:34
  Speaker 2: going based on hope. Yeah, you can't keep going with
• 37:37
  Speaker 2: a contract either, brother.
• 37:38
  Speaker 3: Yeah, this sucks, dude.
• 37:41
  Speaker 2: She said she would do whatever it takes.
• 37:43
  Speaker 3: No, she won't.
• 37:44
  Speaker 2: Well, what if it takes breaking up?
• 37:45
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 37:46
  Speaker 2: She needs to get professional help. I'll support her in
• 37:49
  Speaker 2: getting it, but I can't help with her issues. I
• 37:51
  Speaker 2: tried for seven months and it's clear I can't do
• 37:53
  Speaker 2: anything to help her get over it. No more tests
• 37:56
  Speaker 2: or unreasonable outbursts. If it happens again, I'll walk and
• 37:59
  Speaker 2: she'll also lose me as a friend. And see, this
• 38:01
  Speaker 2: is where the problem starts. Because now... Because you.
• 38:04
  Speaker 3: Said that every time.
• 38:05
  Speaker 2: She's going to be operating from a place of, okay,
• 38:07
  Speaker 2: even if I do feel these things, I can't express them.
• 38:10
  Speaker 2: So now it just turns into a game of hide
• 38:12
  Speaker 2: and seek with our feelings.
• 38:14
  Speaker 3: Yeah. Well, the problem is that she can have those feelings.
• 38:18
  Speaker 3: But the answer is to not is not to have
• 38:21
  Speaker 3: a test or tell friends that you're not in a
• 38:23
  Speaker 3: relationship with this person, etc. It's to talk to your
• 38:27
  Speaker 3: partner and say, hey, I'm having these feelings. Can you
• 38:31
  Speaker 3: reassure me verbally?
• 38:33
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Our relationships. She damaged it, and it will take
• 38:36
  Speaker 2: a while to fix. We had been talking about moving
• 38:39
  Speaker 2: in together before all of this, but I made it
• 38:41
  Speaker 2: clear that was off the table for a while. I
• 38:43
  Speaker 2: wanted the key to my apartment back that I gave her.
• 38:45
  Speaker 2: Her test made me a little paranoid, and now she's
• 38:48
  Speaker 2: going to have to earn my trust back. She agreed
• 38:50
  Speaker 2: with all of these terms. The only thing that kept
• 38:52
  Speaker 2: bothering me was why she thought the test was a
• 38:55
  Speaker 2: good idea. She told me her mom brought up a
• 38:58
  Speaker 2: couple that broke up because the husband cheated. and made
• 39:01
  Speaker 2: the comment about how he always looked like the perfect husband,
• 39:05
  Speaker 2: just like your boyfriend.
• 39:06
  Speaker 3: Oh my goodness. Her family and friends stink.
• 39:10
  Speaker 2: Classic move. This made my girlfriend panic, and she went
• 39:14
  Speaker 2: to talk to a friend who suggested she should test me.
• 39:17
  Speaker 2: But I was more interested in the comments her mom made.
• 39:20
  Speaker 2: It turns out her mom has been making these comments
• 39:22
  Speaker 2: for almost our entire relationship. Things like how I'd end
• 39:26
  Speaker 2: up leaving her and breaking her heart again. Thanks, mom.
• 39:30
  Speaker 2: How I looked a lot happier with my ex. And
• 39:33
  Speaker 2: that once I go abroad for work, I'll find a
• 39:36
  Speaker 2: mistress because they all do. Hey, your mom sounds like
• 39:39
  Speaker 2: a sad, bitter lady.
• 39:42
  Speaker 3: Yeah, let me guess. She's divorced.
• 39:44
  Speaker 2: By the way, my work doesn't even send people abroad anyway.
• 39:47
  Speaker 3: Yeah, wait, what? I thought that was based on something.
• 39:50
  Speaker 3: She just said, when you go abroad.
• 39:53
  Speaker 2: It's just based on vibes.
• 39:55
  Speaker 3: Okay.
• 39:55
  Speaker 2: Nobody knows this is going on. Not even her dad
• 39:58
  Speaker 2: and her brother. I feel they should be in the know,
• 40:01
  Speaker 2: and so does my girlfriend, but she's terrified she'll rip
• 40:04
  Speaker 2: her family apart. What the F do I do with this?
• 40:07
  Speaker 2: There's a third update. Man, it sounds like her family
• 40:09
  Speaker 2: is just like, at.
• 40:10
  Speaker 4: Least her mom.
• 40:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 40:11
  Speaker 2: Super toxic.
• 40:12
  Speaker 4: Oh, yeah.
• 40:13
  Speaker 3: Incredibly so. I would be, I mean, this is unraveling
• 40:17
  Speaker 3: an even bigger web of mistrust that she's learned from
• 40:22
  Speaker 3: her ex and learned from her mother and her friend.
• 40:28
  Speaker 3: She just surrounds herself with people that are terrible for her.
• 40:31
  Speaker 2: Just a big web of sticky nonsense coming from people
• 40:35
  Speaker 2: she trusts. Update three. After our talk, We came to
• 40:41
  Speaker 2: the conclusion that in order for her to get the
• 40:43
  Speaker 2: help she needs, two things need to happen. She needs
• 40:46
  Speaker 2: to move out of her parents' house and away from
• 40:49
  Speaker 2: her mom. And we need to tell her dad and
• 40:52
  Speaker 2: brother what's been going on. Girlfriend was hesitant. She didn't
• 40:55
  Speaker 2: want to break up her family, but I convinced her
• 40:57
  Speaker 2: about at least telling her brother. So if mom tries
• 41:00
  Speaker 2: to manipulate other family members, we at least have someone
• 41:04
  Speaker 2: on our side. We called her brother over and informed
• 41:06
  Speaker 2: him of our talk and our plans. He was happy
• 41:09
  Speaker 2: we were able to work things out and promised his support.
• 41:12
  Speaker 2: When we told him about what his mom had been doing,
• 41:15
  Speaker 2: he was furious. He had noticed she'd been making offhanded
• 41:18
  Speaker 2: comments to him, too. He supported telling her dad and
• 41:21
  Speaker 2: offered to let her stay at his place for as
• 41:23
  Speaker 2: long as she needed. We met their parents the next day.
• 41:26
  Speaker 2: Her brother and I agreed she needed to confront her mother.
• 41:29
  Speaker 2: She told her parents what had been going on and
• 41:32
  Speaker 2: how she was going to get therapy.
• 41:33
  Speaker 4: The moment.
• 41:34
  Speaker 2: She mentioned therapy her mom flat out refused, insisting she
• 41:39
  Speaker 2: didn't need it and that therapy was for crazy people.
• 41:43
  Speaker 3: And for you, girl.
• 41:44
  Speaker 2: Sounds like somebody who can't talk to a therapist because
• 41:47
  Speaker 2: they don't like what they say.
• 41:49
  Speaker 3: Sounds like someone who needs therapy.
• 41:51
  Speaker 2: Her dad tried to calm things down and said she
• 41:54
  Speaker 2: should be allowed to get it, but her mom only
• 41:56
  Speaker 2: got louder. Should be allowed is crazy because.
• 41:59
  Speaker 3: Yeah, she's an adult?
• 42:00
  Speaker 2: Because she is 22. She's an adult?
• 42:02
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 42:03
  Speaker 2: When I said that if her mom wasn't willing to
• 42:06
  Speaker 2: help her, I would, her mom turned on me completely.
• 42:09
  Speaker 2: accusing me of manipulating her daughter since day one, which
• 42:13
  Speaker 2: is funny because that's what mom did, and driving a
• 42:15
  Speaker 2: wedge between her and her children. Her brother shot back
• 42:19
  Speaker 2: that if anyone was making his sister paranoid, it was
• 42:21
  Speaker 2: their mom, which sent her into a screaming fit about
• 42:24
  Speaker 2: being disrespected in her own house and threatening to call
• 42:27
  Speaker 2: the cops. Well, we have zeroed in on the problem,
• 42:31
  Speaker 2: haven't we?
• 42:32
  Speaker 1: Yep.
• 42:32
  Speaker 3: And there it is. I am impressed that Opie stuck around.
• 42:36
  Speaker 3: And seemingly, yeah, we've discovered who the real culprit is.
• 42:41
  Speaker 3: You've unmasked the Scooby-Doo villain.
• 42:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it turns out your ex-boyfriend wasn't the only person
• 42:48
  Speaker 2: who was harming you in your life.
• 42:50
  Speaker 1: No.
• 42:51
  Speaker 2: It's also your mother.
• 42:53
  Speaker 1: What?
• 42:53
  Speaker 2: Shocker. Then came the part that really got to my girlfriend.
• 42:57
  Speaker 2: Her mom started pleading with her, saying I was just
• 43:00
  Speaker 2: like her harmful ex and would hurt her the same way,
• 43:04
  Speaker 2: reminding her that she was the one who was there
• 43:06
  Speaker 2: for her before. Oh. Savior complex.
• 43:11
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm the one who had helped you. I'm the
• 43:14
  Speaker 3: only one who loves you.
• 43:16
  Speaker 2: My girlfriend finally snapped back that I actually cared about her,
• 43:20
  Speaker 2: unlike her mom. And that all her mom had done
• 43:23
  Speaker 2: for years was throw her past mistakes in her face
• 43:25
  Speaker 2: and rain on her happiness. Her mom told her that
• 43:29
  Speaker 2: if she refused to learn, she could pack her bags
• 43:31
  Speaker 2: and get out. And my girlfriend simply told her that
• 43:33
  Speaker 2: was the plan all along.
• 43:36
  Speaker 3: She's like, don't worry, I'm going. And dad just sat there?
• 43:39
  Speaker 2: Dad's just been soaking it in, arms crossed. Sitting there thinking,
• 43:47
  Speaker 2: should I.
• 43:47
  Speaker 4: Be married to my wife?
• 43:49
  Speaker 3: Thinking, how much do lawyers cost? Oh, boy.
• 43:54
  Speaker 2: Her mom then left the room, and her dad went
• 43:57
  Speaker 2: after her. We started gathering my girlfriend's valuables and clothes,
• 44:01
  Speaker 2: and as we were trying to leave, the police arrived.
• 44:04
  Speaker 3: Come on.
• 44:05
  Speaker 2: Her mom called them, telling them I was kidnapping her daughter...
• 44:09
  Speaker 2: And had bad intent when she tried to stop me.
• 44:12
  Speaker 3: Yes, this man who is my daughter's boyfriend is kidnapping
• 44:16
  Speaker 3: my 22-year-old daughter who is leaving willingly.
• 44:20
  Speaker 2: Please, please, please, please, please tell me she gets charged
• 44:23
  Speaker 2: with false reports.
• 44:24
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that would be great. That would be awesome.
• 44:26
  Speaker 2: Please, please, please, please, please.
• 44:28
  Speaker 3: Send her to jail. Take her away, boys.
• 44:31
  Speaker 2: Such a serious thing to also falsely report as well.
• 44:33
  Speaker 2: Girlfriend explains to the cops what's going on. Meanwhile, mom's
• 44:38
  Speaker 2: yelling at them to arrest me.
• 44:40
  Speaker 3: Arrest that man. Arrest him.
• 44:43
  Speaker 2: The cops end up arresting her instead.
• 44:45
  Speaker 4: Yes.
• 44:47
  Speaker 3: Love to see that. The justice system prevails today.
• 44:52
  Speaker 1: Pow.
• 44:54
  Speaker 3: Big wins.
• 44:55
  Speaker 2: Girlfriend hugged her dad goodbye, telling him she'll call, but
• 44:59
  Speaker 2: it's not good for her to be at home right now.
• 45:01
  Speaker 2: They were both crying. We went to her brother's place,
• 45:04
  Speaker 2: unpacked everything, and that is the end of our night. Today, Saturday,
• 45:09
  Speaker 2: girlfriend gets a text from her dad. Mom came home
• 45:12
  Speaker 2: and smashed all the things we couldn't take and talks
• 45:15
  Speaker 2: about how she doesn't have a daughter anymore. Yeah, crazy.
• 45:19
  Speaker 2: What is that complex? Let us know in the comments
• 45:22
  Speaker 2: what complex this is because it's so clear that it's like,
• 45:26
  Speaker 2: Something messed up in her brain where she's like, no
• 45:29
  Speaker 2: one else can have my daughter. I'm the only one
• 45:32
  Speaker 2: who's allowed to show up for her.
• 45:33
  Speaker 3: Yeah. She belongs to me. Right.
• 45:36
  Speaker 2: And now that she's gone, it's like full blown nuclear meltdown.
• 45:40
  Speaker 3: It's the, it's the, you know, mother Gothel tangle.
• 45:44
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 45:45
  Speaker 1: Yes, exactly.
• 45:46
  Speaker 2: Girlfriend doesn't care. She's happy she's out, and she has
• 45:50
  Speaker 2: her first therapy session next Wednesday. I'll do my part,
• 45:53
  Speaker 2: and it seems girlfriend is willing to do hers. We
• 45:56
  Speaker 2: have a long way to go, but at least we've
• 45:58
  Speaker 2: set the first steps. And that is the end of
• 46:01
  Speaker 2: that story.
• 46:02
  Speaker 3: Wow, y'all really pulled it back. I did not have
• 46:05
  Speaker 3: any faith in your relationship, let me tell you that.
• 46:07
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it was really on the outs there for a second.
• 46:10
  Speaker 3: I wanted to be done in the first, you know,
• 46:13
  Speaker 3: first foul.
• 46:15
  Speaker 2: One strike, you're out.
• 46:15
  Speaker 3: Yeah, truly. I was done on the first strike. And
• 46:19
  Speaker 3: here we are, three strikes later, a whole move out
• 46:23
  Speaker 3: and a crazy mom.
• 46:25
  Speaker 2: All those strikes belonged to the mother.
• 46:27
  Speaker 3: Yeah, wow.
• 46:28
  Speaker 2: The mother!
• 46:29
  Speaker 3: Sometimes I guess you're... Joke's on me, I guess.
• 46:34
  Speaker 1: And that's the end of this story. We're gonna go
• 46:36
  Speaker 1: on to the next one.
• 46:38
  Speaker 4: My boyfriend's friend keeps flirting with him right in front
• 46:42
  Speaker 4: of me?
• 46:42
  Speaker 3: Excuse me, that's mine.
• 46:44
  Speaker 4: This is going to sound like a typical insecure girlfriend,
• 46:47
  Speaker 4: but I promise. It's not like that. My boyfriend and
• 46:50
  Speaker 4: I have been together for over six months and he's
• 46:53
  Speaker 4: really great. He has a friend that he's had for
• 46:55
  Speaker 4: years who is a girl. Normally, I'm not the type
• 46:58
  Speaker 4: to be all like, you're not allowed to hang out
• 47:01
  Speaker 4: with a single girl alone. But I'm considering telling my
• 47:04
  Speaker 4: boyfriend that he's not allowed to hang out with this
• 47:06
  Speaker 4: girl alone. This girl is obviously so into him. and
• 47:10
  Speaker 4: she def wants me to know she's coming for him.
• 47:14
  Speaker 4: She keeps saying stuff like, you don't know him like
• 47:17
  Speaker 4: I do yet. We used to all go to that
• 47:19
  Speaker 4: place together all the time before you guys started dating.
• 47:22
  Speaker 4: Oh my gosh, remember when we went on a hike,
• 47:26
  Speaker 4: just the two of us, Josh? That was the best day.
• 47:29
  Speaker 4: She also had cute pet names for him, but I
• 47:31
  Speaker 4: didn't like that, so as soon as I heard it,
• 47:34
  Speaker 4: I told my boyfriend I didn't like it and he
• 47:36
  Speaker 4: made her stop. I asked her straight up if she's
• 47:38
  Speaker 4: into him and her response pissed me off so much.
• 47:41
  Speaker 4: She was like, I know it's intimidating how close he
• 47:44
  Speaker 4: and I are, but don't worry. You're the girlfriend. I'm
• 47:48
  Speaker 4: just the friend.
• 47:48
  Speaker 1: Right?
• 47:49
  Speaker 4: With the smug smile on her face, I got so mad,
• 47:52
  Speaker 4: but I couldn't talk to my boyfriend about it yet.
• 47:54
  Speaker 4: By the way, this comes from throwawayjohn095553. And if you
• 47:58
  Speaker 4: want to see my own stories, you know where to go.
• 48:00
  Speaker 4: I'm Riley.
• 48:01
  Speaker 3: I'm Savannah.
• 48:01
  Speaker 4: We're going to read the story goofily. If you have
• 48:03
  Speaker 4: anything to add, please add it down below. I want
• 48:05
  Speaker 4: to tell him to cut her out of his life
• 48:07
  Speaker 4: so bad, I don't know if I can do that.
• 48:10
  Speaker 4: My boyfriend's dad passed away two years ago with a
• 48:13
  Speaker 4: heart condition. He told me that his dad... was his
• 48:16
  Speaker 4: best friend growing up, so it hit him really hard.
• 48:18
  Speaker 4: He was the only family my boyfriend had. Apparently, this
• 48:22
  Speaker 4: girl really helped him get through it. She apparently was
• 48:25
  Speaker 4: there for him throughout the whole thing. That's why he
• 48:28
  Speaker 4: says she's like a sister to him. That's why I
• 48:30
  Speaker 4: don't know what to do. I already asked him to
• 48:32
  Speaker 4: set some boundaries, like she can't text late at night
• 48:35
  Speaker 4: or come over to his place unannounced all the time,
• 48:39
  Speaker 4: And no interrupting our alone time together. My boyfriend doesn't
• 48:42
  Speaker 4: realize that she's into him. Kinda don't blame him on
• 48:45
  Speaker 4: that one because all of her flirts are subtle enough
• 48:48
  Speaker 4: that he doesn't realize. But enough to get me riled up.
• 48:52
  Speaker 4: I know my boyfriend isn't into her at all. And
• 48:55
  Speaker 4: he's completely friendzoned her. But it's still so frustrating. I
• 48:59
  Speaker 4: hate to admit it. She's so good at getting under
• 49:02
  Speaker 4: my skin. I don't know what to do. I really
• 49:05
  Speaker 4: need some advice. Thanks, Reddit. If you have a big
• 49:07
  Speaker 4: enough ice block and you tie it to a rope
• 49:10
  Speaker 4: and then you tie her ankle to the other side,
• 49:12
  Speaker 4: you guys are in the middle of an ocean. By
• 49:14
  Speaker 4: the time she sinks down, the ice block will dissipate
• 49:16
  Speaker 4: and there will be no evidence that you tied it
• 49:18
  Speaker 4: around her ankle.
• 49:18
  Speaker 3: What does that have to do with literally.
• 49:20
  Speaker 4: Anything i'm just saying this is how you can get
• 49:22
  Speaker 4: rid of her oh sure.
• 49:23
  Speaker 3: Well then bring it out to the boyfriend what are
• 49:25
  Speaker 3: you doing.
• 49:26
  Speaker 4: She's mentioned little things i don't like this nickname i
• 49:29
  Speaker 4: don't like this i don't like that But nothing to
• 49:31
  Speaker 4: the extent of I don't want her around. I don't
• 49:34
  Speaker 4: want her to intrude our alone time.
• 49:36
  Speaker 2: But they've only been together for six months.
• 49:38
  Speaker 4: Half a year.
• 49:39
  Speaker 3: That's a reasonable time.
• 49:40
  Speaker 4: Does she have the right to say this?
• 49:42
  Speaker 5: Yes, if she's infringing on the relationship, then yeah, she
• 49:45
  Speaker 5: does have a right. If she feels threatened by this
• 49:47
  Speaker 5: girl and this girl has been giving her weird side
• 49:50
  Speaker 5: comments and being like, I'm just the best friend, right?
• 49:53
  Speaker 3: Screw you. And guess what?
• 49:55
  Speaker 5: I'm going to tell my boyfriend and be like, yeah,
• 49:57
  Speaker 5: she's crazy, whatever, la la la. And he's going to
• 49:59
  Speaker 5: sign with me. And if he doesn't, then that's on them.
• 50:02
  Speaker 4: Thanks to everyone for the advice. I've decided that I
• 50:05
  Speaker 4: will tell my boyfriend everything she's done so far and
• 50:08
  Speaker 4: see how he handles it. To be honest, I was
• 50:12
  Speaker 4: hoping I'd avoid telling my boyfriend about it, but she
• 50:15
  Speaker 4: left me no choice. In the meantime, I don't know
• 50:18
  Speaker 4: how I'll bring it up to my boyfriend, but I'll
• 50:20
  Speaker 4: figure it out.
• 50:21
  Speaker 2: Update.
• 50:21
  Speaker 4: After reading the comments, I decided just to bring it
• 50:25
  Speaker 4: up with him without telling him what I want to do.
• 50:28
  Speaker 4: To avoid sounding controlling, I sat him down and told
• 50:31
  Speaker 4: him that some of the stuff she says really makes
• 50:34
  Speaker 4: me uncomfortable. I told him that I feel like she's
• 50:37
  Speaker 4: undermining our relationship. I gave him a few examples of
• 50:40
  Speaker 4: the stuff she said and done that I still don't appreciate.
• 50:44
  Speaker 4: He still doesn't think she's into him. He's convinced that
• 50:48
  Speaker 4: she's acting this way because she probably feels like they're
• 50:51
  Speaker 4: drifting apart as friends because he's in a serious relationship now,
• 50:55
  Speaker 4: which is frustrating me a little, to be honest, because
• 50:58
  Speaker 4: it's clear to me that she wants him, but being
• 51:01
  Speaker 4: subtle about it. She said that regardless of her intentions,
• 51:05
  Speaker 4: if her actions are making me uncomfortable, he'll have a
• 51:08
  Speaker 4: talk with her about it. I was happy. He said
• 51:11
  Speaker 4: that because I was really nervous and anxious to see
• 51:14
  Speaker 4: how he'll react. I was afraid he'll take her side.
• 51:17
  Speaker 4: He can be a dummy sometimes, so I was worried
• 51:20
  Speaker 4: that he'd bring it up with her in the wrong way.
• 51:22
  Speaker 4: Like saying, my girlfriend doesn't want us talking anymore and
• 51:26
  Speaker 4: stuff like that. But he nailed it. He told her
• 51:28
  Speaker 4: in a text, dude, I know some of the stuff
• 51:30
  Speaker 4: you've been saying in front of my girlfriend lately, and
• 51:33
  Speaker 4: I've been wanting to talk to you about it. It's
• 51:35
  Speaker 4: mad disrespectful and uncomfortable. We're cool, but just stop that crap. Naturally,
• 51:40
  Speaker 4: she acted all innocent and confused. She was like, what?
• 51:43
  Speaker 4: You know, I'd never do anything that would upset you.
• 51:45
  Speaker 4: I think you're misunderstanding and stuff like that. He doubled
• 51:48
  Speaker 4: down on it anyways. I could tell he felt somewhat
• 51:51
  Speaker 4: guilty after telling her off like that. And I don't
• 51:55
  Speaker 4: know if he's convinced that she's trying to undermine a
• 51:58
  Speaker 4: relationship or not.
• 51:59
  Speaker 2: But.
• 51:59
  Speaker 4: I'm so glad that he had my back on this.
• 52:02
  Speaker 4: You passed the.
• 52:03
  Speaker 2: Test, man.
• 52:04
  Speaker 3: You did. Truly is.
• 52:05
  Speaker 5: If you choose, if your partner is feeling uncomfortable, you
• 52:09
  Speaker 5: have to, I mean, you don't have to choose them
• 52:11
  Speaker 5: but in this particular situation yes you should choose your
• 52:14
  Speaker 5: partner your partner should come first before anyone else obviously
• 52:18
  Speaker 5: but you know there are some things situations where that's
• 52:22
  Speaker 5: not possible.
• 52:22
  Speaker 4: But this one i think you handled very well agreed
• 52:25
  Speaker 4: agreed good job i'm honestly kind of glad this whole
• 52:27
  Speaker 4: thing happened it gave me a better idea of what
• 52:30
  Speaker 4: kind of man he really is he even said he'll
• 52:32
  Speaker 4: stop hanging out with her alone If that makes me
• 52:35
  Speaker 4: feel uncomfortable. He was also low-key mad at me for
• 52:37
  Speaker 4: waiting this long to tell him I was uncomfortable around her.
• 52:40
  Speaker 4: It's a new relationship. It takes a little bit. She
• 52:42
  Speaker 4: doesn't really know her place.
• 52:43
  Speaker 5: Yeah, and you didn't want to cause any riff in
• 52:46
  Speaker 5: anyone's relationships or, you know, anything.
• 52:49
  Speaker 4: Save to say that the best possible outcome happened. He
• 52:52
  Speaker 4: really put her in her place. And not gonna lie...
• 52:55
  Speaker 4: It made me feel really good about it. All I
• 52:57
  Speaker 4: could think of was, I won, LMAO. Thanks to everyone
• 53:00
  Speaker 4: for encouraging me to tell him because even though I
• 53:02
  Speaker 4: knew that's what I should have done, I was still
• 53:05
  Speaker 4: scared to do it for some reason. I even thought
• 53:07
  Speaker 4: about potentially just avoiding her for good, which sounds ridiculous
• 53:11
  Speaker 4: now that I think about it because I shouldn't have
• 53:13
  Speaker 4: to hide from her. I guess I'm just not good
• 53:16
  Speaker 4: at confrontations. Thanks for the helpful advice, everyone. Okay, story
• 53:19
  Speaker 4: time here. I knew a girl back in Tennessee. We
• 53:22
  Speaker 4: were part of like the same church group. She was
• 53:24
  Speaker 4: my friend since 16. But one of the things she
• 53:26
  Speaker 4: would do whenever guys would be in relationships with like
• 53:29
  Speaker 4: her girlfriends would have guy friends or like boyfriends or whatever.
• 53:32
  Speaker 4: She would say, oh my gosh, remember guy friend whenever
• 53:35
  Speaker 4: we would used to do this. I know you for
• 53:36
  Speaker 4: so long. Well, like comparing like that, like doing that thing.
• 53:40
  Speaker 4: And these guys would start getting interested in her. She's pretty.
• 53:43
  Speaker 4: And they would break up with their girlfriends and kind
• 53:44
  Speaker 4: of pursue her. And then she would kind of block
• 53:47
  Speaker 4: it or just kind of like wait for them to
• 53:48
  Speaker 4: crawl to her and would not have that type of
• 53:50
  Speaker 4: relationship with them anymore. It would only happen in the
• 53:53
  Speaker 4: context of the boyfriend being in a relationship with a boy.
• 53:56
  Speaker 4: It was weird. It was really weird. She wouldn't agree
• 53:58
  Speaker 4: to it. A lot of her friends realized it and
• 54:00
  Speaker 4: it was kind of weird. Like I thought she was
• 54:02
  Speaker 4: a good friend of mine and I asked her to
• 54:04
  Speaker 4: go to coffee because I had something in my life
• 54:05
  Speaker 4: happen where it was like, I'm moving to LA. You've
• 54:07
  Speaker 4: always wanted to move to LA. How have you explained
• 54:09
  Speaker 4: that to like people? And she's like, I don't hang
• 54:11
  Speaker 4: out with guys one-on-one. She said that before, but I'm like,
• 54:13
  Speaker 4: it's coffee. It's in a public place. It's not going
• 54:15
  Speaker 4: to feel like one-on-one because all of our friends are
• 54:17
  Speaker 4: going to be around because everyone goes to that coffee shop.
• 54:19
  Speaker 4: But it's kind of weird. She got married recently.
• 54:21
  Speaker 3: Well, she found her man.
• 54:22
  Speaker 4: Good for her. Good for her. I don't know why
• 54:25
  Speaker 4: girls do that whenever guys are in relationships.
• 54:28
  Speaker 3: I don't do that.
• 54:29
  Speaker 4: Have you seen those memes where it's like a girl,
• 54:31
  Speaker 4: whenever you're in a relationship, she puts on makeup. Oh
• 54:33
  Speaker 4: my God. It's been so long since I've seen you.
• 54:36
  Speaker 3: I've just never done that.
• 54:38
  Speaker 4: Good for you guys. We got another story coming right up.
• 54:40
  Speaker 5: My girlfriend hasn't worked in three years and won't even
• 54:44
  Speaker 5: look for a job.
• 54:45
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 54:45
  Speaker 3: You got to do it now.
• 54:46
  Speaker 5: I have been dating a girl some years younger than me.
• 54:49
  Speaker 5: She still lives at home and is an only child.
• 54:52
  Speaker 5: Her parents pay for most things as she doesn't currently
• 54:54
  Speaker 5: have a job. When we met, she admitted she wasn't
• 54:57
  Speaker 5: working and couldn't really afford to date and suggested low-cost activities.
• 55:01
  Speaker 5: As such, I've been covering dating expenses while we've been dating.
• 55:05
  Speaker 5: but told her I would only do this on a
• 55:07
  Speaker 5: temporary basis, at max about three months. We're about a
• 55:10
  Speaker 5: month in now and she recently revealed she.
• 55:13
  Speaker 3: Hasn't worked in nearly three years.
• 55:15
  Speaker 5: She also revealed she hadn't been looking for work at all.
• 55:18
  Speaker 5: She doesn't even have an up-to-date resume. We have had
• 55:21
  Speaker 5: several serious talks about the situation as she hasn't been
• 55:24
  Speaker 5: looking for work and it really concerns me. I've been
• 55:27
  Speaker 5: really clear that I can't see us lasting past the
• 55:29
  Speaker 5: three-month mark unless she finds work because I'm not willing
• 55:32
  Speaker 5: to support a partner long term. Her refusing to even
• 55:35
  Speaker 5: look after being told, that makes me think she doesn't
• 55:38
  Speaker 5: take me very seriously or doesn't take my feelings on
• 55:41
  Speaker 5: the situation very seriously. I'm gutted each day when she
• 55:44
  Speaker 5: tells me she spent it doing something other than job searching,
• 55:47
  Speaker 5: which I've yet to hear about her doing. By the way,
• 55:50
  Speaker 5: this comes from Advanced Dance. And if you want to
• 55:52
  Speaker 5: submit your own stories, go to the r slash OK
• 55:54
  Speaker 5: Storytime subreddit.
• 55:55
  Speaker 3: I'm Savannah. I'm Sophia.
• 55:57
  Speaker 5: And we are here to give some good advice in
• 55:59
  Speaker 5: a little goofy way, but we don't have all your answers.
• 56:01
  Speaker 5: Let me tell you what we would do, but let
• 56:02
  Speaker 5: us know what you would do down in the comments.
• 56:04
  Speaker 5: She is very loving and respectful when she visits my place.
• 56:08
  Speaker 5: She does chores without being asked. She cooks most of
• 56:11
  Speaker 5: the meals when she is here. She frequently cleans up
• 56:13
  Speaker 5: before I'm finished eating because she's a faster eater. She
• 56:16
  Speaker 5: really does try to contribute to the household in domestic ways.
• 56:19
  Speaker 5: We are also very compatible in the bedroom. I'm realizing
• 56:22
  Speaker 5: this probably isn't going to last, and I don't know
• 56:24
  Speaker 5: how to gracefully deal with the situation. I'm 100% on
• 56:27
  Speaker 5: board to keep seeing her if she'll genuinely begin... looking
• 56:30
  Speaker 5: for work, but I'm more and more feeling like this
• 56:33
  Speaker 5: is going to turn into a situation where she'll run
• 56:35
  Speaker 5: out of money and look to me to fix it,
• 56:37
  Speaker 5: which I'm unwilling to do. I'm willing to cover the
• 56:40
  Speaker 5: dating expenses for up to three months as I've told her.
• 56:43
  Speaker 5: but I'm not willing to lend slash give her any money.
• 56:45
  Speaker 5: I feel like if she can't afford to see me
• 56:47
  Speaker 5: as a consequence of her not working and not even
• 56:51
  Speaker 5: trying to, that's her basically having broken up with me
• 56:54
  Speaker 5: due to disinterest. Is this a twisted way to see it?
• 56:57
  Speaker 5: I'd feel differently if she was actively looking for work.
• 56:59
  Speaker 5: Am I wasting my time hoping she will get motivated
• 57:02
  Speaker 5: and begin applying? I am reluctant to throw away such
• 57:04
  Speaker 5: an otherwise fantastic relationship Similar hobbies, life goals, interests, long-term plans,
• 57:09
  Speaker 5: spicy hobby. In what is a very small dating pool,
• 57:12
  Speaker 5: sapphic community. However, a partner's independence is critical to me,
• 57:17
  Speaker 5: and if she can't demonstrate her ability to achieve it,
• 57:19
  Speaker 5: This is going nowhere fast.
• 57:21
  Speaker 3: Okay. So this is interesting because we didn't have genders.
• 57:24
  Speaker 3: I did not know. I just assumed my straight brain. Yeah.
• 57:28
  Speaker 4: Oops.
• 57:28
  Speaker 3: Dang it. I mean, it is interesting because this is
• 57:31
  Speaker 3: a sapphic relationship, but has very traditional, you know, looking
• 57:36
  Speaker 3: set up here.
• 57:37
  Speaker 5: A traditional microscope.
• 57:40
  Speaker 3: A traditional way of looking at it sure yeah i
• 57:43
  Speaker 3: mean they've just like approached it a very traditional way
• 57:47
  Speaker 3: and i'm interested in i don't know in why like
• 57:52
  Speaker 3: what made this girl operate this way you know has
• 57:55
  Speaker 3: she tried other relationships tried to do this in our
• 57:58
  Speaker 3: other relationships and not succeeded.
• 58:00
  Speaker 5: Or maybe in her other relationships they made her stop
• 58:03
  Speaker 5: working You know, or yeah, or.
• 58:05
  Speaker 3: She was like she could be bi and she could
• 58:07
  Speaker 3: have dated men who were more traditional and then is
• 58:09
  Speaker 3: applying that to a queer relationship. We don't know.
• 58:12
  Speaker 5: Please help me with setting good boundaries here. I broke
• 58:15
  Speaker 5: things off shortly after I posted and read your comments
• 58:17
  Speaker 5: to do so. It matched what my friends and Ed
• 58:20
  Speaker 5: were saying. We remain friends with benefits and see each
• 58:23
  Speaker 5: other about once a week or a clearly defined period
• 58:25
  Speaker 5: of time. She knows I'm continuing to date. I've been
• 58:28
  Speaker 5: very upfront about it. But has told me she probably
• 58:31
  Speaker 5: won't be dating until she solves her job situation. Not
• 58:34
  Speaker 5: like she could afford to unless her date always paid
• 58:36
  Speaker 5: for her anyways.
• 58:37
  Speaker 3: She admitted a week.
• 58:39
  Speaker 5: Or so into the friends with benefits thing that she
• 58:41
  Speaker 5: wasn't going to act on the job situation until it
• 58:43
  Speaker 5: became an emergency with immediate consequences. And said she could
• 58:47
  Speaker 5: see her current situation continuing until her parents downsized their
• 58:51
  Speaker 5: home and punt her out.
• 58:52
  Speaker 3: Which is years off.
• 58:53
  Speaker 5: She said her last girlfriend ended things with her for
• 58:56
  Speaker 5: the same reason. Clearly, I made the right call. I
• 58:58
  Speaker 5: was really upfront with her that I'd be willing to
• 59:00
  Speaker 5: consider a relationship in the future if she was independent,
• 59:03
  Speaker 5: but her lack of progress in that area was a
• 59:05
  Speaker 5: deal breaker for me.
• 59:06
  Speaker 3: I think you made the right decision, OP. Yeah, she's
• 59:09
  Speaker 3: not gonna change. and no.
• 59:10
  Speaker 5: That's not part of your, you know, you want someone
• 59:13
  Speaker 5: who has ambition, who has drive, who has motivation, and
• 59:16
  Speaker 5: she clearly does not.
• 59:17
  Speaker 3: Some people don't. And sometimes people make it work. I
• 59:20
  Speaker 3: really think within like the first maybe year, six months,
• 59:25
  Speaker 3: I don't know what the timeline is, but especially not
• 59:27
  Speaker 3: in the first month, you shouldn't be wanting to change
• 59:29
  Speaker 3: your partner. Really?
• 59:31
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 59:32
  Speaker 3: Really? Like at all? Maybe not at all.
• 59:34
  Speaker 4: Like, I don't know.
• 59:35
  Speaker 3: I don't know what the level of change is allowed
• 59:37
  Speaker 3: that you can want, but I think to this level,
• 59:40
  Speaker 3: you shouldn't want to change your partner that much. It's
• 59:42
  Speaker 3: just incompatibility.
• 59:43
  Speaker 5: She says she understands and knows her not working as
• 59:46
  Speaker 5: a deal breaker for most people. She just hoped that
• 59:48
  Speaker 5: I could look past it and see what a great
• 59:50
  Speaker 5: person she was. I said I could clearly see she
• 59:53
  Speaker 5: was a wonderful person, but that financially supporting someone, barring
• 59:56
  Speaker 5: medical issues with a long-term partner, is a hard no
• 59:59
  Speaker 5: from me and from almost anyone with good boundaries, especially
• 1:00:03
  Speaker 5: at the beginning of a relationship.
• 1:00:04
  Speaker 3: Independence is spicy.
• 1:00:08
  Speaker 5: She pouted a bit and then offered a friends with
• 1:00:10
  Speaker 5: benefit arrangement, which I accepted because, well, that side of things.
• 1:00:14
  Speaker 3: It's great.
• 1:00:14
  Speaker 5: She is back on her medication at my urging and
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 5: is starting therapy soon, so maybe that will help to
• 1:00:19
  Speaker 5: motivate her. But if not, I have a date with
• 1:00:22
  Speaker 5: a woman who works in my industry on Tuesday and
• 1:00:25
  Speaker 5: have been here.
• 1:00:26
  Speaker 3: Apps again.
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 5: It's not hopeless out there, and I get to have
• 1:00:29
  Speaker 5: good spicy sleep in the meantime.
• 1:00:30
  Speaker 3: Win-win.
• 1:00:31
  Speaker 5: Thanks all for your advice.
• 1:00:34
  Speaker 3: Oh, please. You can't put her down. You can't punch
• 1:00:37
  Speaker 3: her down. You can't bring this girl down. You push
• 1:00:39
  Speaker 3: her down, she's coming right back up. She pops right
• 1:00:41
  Speaker 3: back up. She says, don't worry, I got a friends
• 1:00:43
  Speaker 3: with benefits situation. She said, don't worry, my life's freaking great.
• 1:00:46
  Speaker 3: I'm getting it on both ends. I'm single and ready
• 1:00:49
  Speaker 3: to mingle. Hey, I got on the maps. But that's
• 1:00:52
  Speaker 3: the end of that story. And we got another one
• 1:00:54
  Speaker 3: coming right up. I let my boyfriend crash for a week.
• 1:00:58
  Speaker 3: Now he won't move out. Oh, buddy, it's move out o'clock.
• 1:01:01
  Speaker 3: My boyfriend, 30 male, and I, 23 female, have been
• 1:01:05
  Speaker 3: dating around two months. In that time, he has quit
• 1:01:08
  Speaker 3: his job for another job that didn't materialize and had
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 3: to move out of his apartment because the lease was
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 3: up and he was jobless. And at the time, he
• 1:01:15
  Speaker 3: was planning to move to another place after starting the
• 1:01:17
  Speaker 3: new job. He's been staying with me since then. about
• 1:01:20
  Speaker 3: a month and it seems like he's not really trying
• 1:01:22
  Speaker 3: terribly hard to find employment. He's put out resumes but
• 1:01:26
  Speaker 3: not gotten any interviews and I doubt it's because of
• 1:01:28
  Speaker 3: lack of experience or something. We live in a service
• 1:01:30
  Speaker 3: industry oriented town. It's generally not that hard to find
• 1:01:34
  Speaker 3: something to do in that industry. So for the past
• 1:01:36
  Speaker 3: month I've been paying for everything. Food, drinks, when we
• 1:01:40
  Speaker 3: go out, haven't charged him for anything. He does help
• 1:01:43
  Speaker 3: around the house, which I appreciate, but I didn't sign
• 1:01:45
  Speaker 3: up for living together after a month of dating. I
• 1:01:47
  Speaker 3: agreed to let him crash with me because he was
• 1:01:49
  Speaker 3: supposed to be starting the new job like a week later,
• 1:01:52
  Speaker 3: and presumably once he got paid, he would have moved on.
• 1:01:55
  Speaker 3: This has stressed me out a lot. I really wasn't
• 1:01:57
  Speaker 3: ready to live together, and I thought that was clear.
• 1:02:00
  Speaker 3: And just seeing that nothing was changing for the past
• 1:02:02
  Speaker 3: month was making me extremely uncomfortable. So I started pulling
• 1:02:05
  Speaker 3: back a bit. I'm a person that needs a good
• 1:02:07
  Speaker 3: bit of alone time, and I literally never get it now.
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 3: He's always there. I brought this up last night because
• 1:02:13
  Speaker 3: he asked me if something was wrong, and I calmly
• 1:02:15
  Speaker 3: explained that while I wasn't going to punt him to
• 1:02:17
  Speaker 3: the curb, I needed him to find his own place
• 1:02:20
  Speaker 3: as soon as possible, and I needed him to be
• 1:02:22
  Speaker 3: out of the house a few nights a week so
• 1:02:24
  Speaker 3: I could recharge. This did not go over well. By
• 1:02:27
  Speaker 3: the way, this comes from Deleted, and if you want
• 1:02:29
  Speaker 3: to submit your own stories, go to the r slash
• 1:02:30
  Speaker 3: showcase story time subreddit.
• 1:02:32
  Speaker 4: I'm Sophia.
• 1:02:32
  Speaker 3: And I'm Savannah. And we're here to give good advice goofily,
• 1:02:35
  Speaker 3: but we don't have all the answers. We only know
• 1:02:36
  Speaker 3: what we'd do. So let us know what you would do.
• 1:02:38
  Speaker 3: In the comments. He went crazy. He said I lied
• 1:02:41
  Speaker 3: to him for the past three weeks because I didn't
• 1:02:43
  Speaker 3: tell him I wasn't happy with him staying there. I
• 1:02:46
  Speaker 3: was just hoping that he'd find a job so I
• 1:02:48
  Speaker 3: wouldn't have to make it seem like I was punting
• 1:02:50
  Speaker 3: him out with no options. He can't understand how I
• 1:02:52
  Speaker 3: don't have enough space even though we are together literally
• 1:02:55
  Speaker 3: the entire time I'm not at work. He was going
• 1:02:57
  Speaker 3: on and on about how much he cares about me.
• 1:03:01
  Speaker 3: And how he's tried so hard to make me happy, etc.
• 1:03:04
  Speaker 3: And I just feel like he didn't hear me at all. Yeah,
• 1:03:07
  Speaker 3: it sounds a lot like him, him, him. Like, oh
• 1:03:09
  Speaker 3: my gosh, what am I going to do? And how
• 1:03:13
  Speaker 3: could you do this to me?
• 1:03:15
  Speaker 2: I don't know, dude.
• 1:03:16
  Speaker 3: Get a job. That's what you're going to do? This
• 1:03:18
  Speaker 3: has happened in the past where I try to calmly
• 1:03:20
  Speaker 3: bring up an issue when I'm not even mad just
• 1:03:22
  Speaker 3: to communicate with him. And he turns it around into
• 1:03:25
  Speaker 3: a woe is me type thing. Is it so crazy
• 1:03:27
  Speaker 3: that I don't want to live with someone I've only
• 1:03:29
  Speaker 3: been dating for two months? Especially when they aren't even
• 1:03:31
  Speaker 3: supporting themselves right now? I don't know what to do.
• 1:03:34
  Speaker 3: I don't have anyone to talk about this. Most of
• 1:03:36
  Speaker 3: our friends are mutual and I feel like I'm going
• 1:03:38
  Speaker 3: to end up without friends if I don't handle this well.
• 1:03:41
  Speaker 3: I wasn't even trying to break up when I told
• 1:03:43
  Speaker 3: them I needed space and to live separately. But his
• 1:03:45
  Speaker 3: reaction made me question that and think maybe we should.
• 1:03:49
  Speaker 3: There is an update. What do you think? Yeah, I
• 1:03:51
  Speaker 3: think that this isn't going to work out.
• 1:03:53
  Speaker 5: You're already like, you know, having this huge like blowout
• 1:03:56
  Speaker 5: after dating for two months and him not getting, not
• 1:03:59
  Speaker 5: looking for a job, not getting a job.
• 1:04:01
  Speaker 3: And then also being like, I'm just going to stay here.
• 1:04:03
  Speaker 3: And it's like, actually, dude, I'm not your mom. So no,
• 1:04:06
  Speaker 3: I don't have to pay for you. And I don't
• 1:04:07
  Speaker 3: have to house you. Absolutely. There is no responsibility to
• 1:04:11
  Speaker 3: this 30 year old man. Update. I got home yesterday.
• 1:04:14
  Speaker 3: I posted this while at work, and he immediately called
• 1:04:16
  Speaker 3: me asking if he could come over to get some clothes.
• 1:04:19
  Speaker 3: It was raining. I said fine. Predictably, he came over
• 1:04:22
  Speaker 3: and started being manipulative, telling me he's been out in
• 1:04:25
  Speaker 3: the rain all day and has nowhere to go. Even
• 1:04:28
  Speaker 3: though at this point I had not yet even punted
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 3: him out of my apartment. Eventually, I got him to leave.
• 1:04:33
  Speaker 3: He succeeded in making me feel crappy. And honestly, I
• 1:04:37
  Speaker 3: wasn't nearly assertive enough. Bear with me. I left my
• 1:04:39
  Speaker 3: apartment for a while to get my mind off everything.
• 1:04:42
  Speaker 3: Just went to a local bar and had one drink,
• 1:04:44
  Speaker 3: then came home. Was gone a maximum of 40 minutes.
• 1:04:47
  Speaker 3: Come home, open the door, and he's on my couch.
• 1:04:50
  Speaker 3: He was passed out, wasted. I just got in the
• 1:04:52
  Speaker 3: shower and hoped he would sleep it off and we
• 1:04:54
  Speaker 3: could have a real conversation in the morning. I get
• 1:04:57
  Speaker 3: out of the shower again and he starts going nuts,
• 1:04:59
  Speaker 3: twisting my words, even though I said nothing negative at all,
• 1:05:02
  Speaker 3: just saying horrible things and refusing to listen to me.
• 1:05:05
  Speaker 3: I asked for my key back and he said F
• 1:05:07
  Speaker 3: no and locked the door behind him and started accusing
• 1:05:10
  Speaker 3: me of trying to steal his stuff. He has some
• 1:05:12
  Speaker 3: expensive equipment in my storage room. I told him, no,
• 1:05:15
  Speaker 3: I don't care about your equipment at all, but I'm
• 1:05:17
  Speaker 3: not dealing with this and I need you to leave
• 1:05:19
  Speaker 3: and you can call me tomorrow about your stuff. I
• 1:05:21
  Speaker 3: am now scared and now we call the police. Yeah, no,
• 1:05:24
  Speaker 3: because he is.
• 1:05:26
  Speaker 5: Under the influence and is now trying to manipulate you,
• 1:05:29
  Speaker 5: feel bad, and is kind of getting a little aggressive.
• 1:05:31
  Speaker 3: He wouldn't leave, so I did because I couldn't take it.
• 1:05:34
  Speaker 5: There is a reason this guy is single when he's
• 1:05:38
  Speaker 5: 30 and also doesn't have a home and doesn't have
• 1:05:41
  Speaker 5: a job.
• 1:05:41
  Speaker 1: He.
• 1:05:42
  Speaker 5: definitely is a moocher, takes advantage of people and then
• 1:05:44
  Speaker 5: flips it around on them and makes them feel bad.
• 1:05:46
  Speaker 5: He's taking advantage of you.
• 1:05:47
  Speaker 3: He is trying to make.
• 1:05:48
  Speaker 5: You feel bad for what? What should you feel bad for?
• 1:05:52
  Speaker 5: For not letting this man who doesn't have a house,
• 1:05:55
  Speaker 5: doesn't have a job, has no ambition to work, has,
• 1:05:58
  Speaker 5: you know, nothing really to his name. Not, Taking care
• 1:06:00
  Speaker 5: of him?
• 1:06:01
  Speaker 3: Not your job. It's not your job at all. You
• 1:06:03
  Speaker 3: basically don't know this man. It's been two months. This
• 1:06:06
  Speaker 3: is a weird, weird man. And now you're finding out
• 1:06:08
  Speaker 3: way too much about him.
• 1:06:09
  Speaker 1: Yes.
• 1:06:10
  Speaker 3: I called my friend and went to her place because
• 1:06:12
  Speaker 3: I didn't know where else to go. She's close with
• 1:06:14
  Speaker 3: him as well, and I talked to him earlier about
• 1:06:16
  Speaker 3: everything before he was wasted. Even then, he had told
• 1:06:18
  Speaker 3: her a story that didn't even make sense regarding what
• 1:06:21
  Speaker 3: I had said the night before about needing space and
• 1:06:23
  Speaker 3: wanting to live separately. It was so helpful to know
• 1:06:25
  Speaker 3: that someone else we both know realizes I'm not crazy
• 1:06:28
  Speaker 3: and was there for me. When I left, she told
• 1:06:30
  Speaker 3: me to call if I got home and he was
• 1:06:32
  Speaker 3: still crazy. I went home and he was passed out again.
• 1:06:35
  Speaker 3: You got to call the police and pump this guy out.
• 1:06:37
  Speaker 5: Yeah, you can't just sit there and be like, well,
• 1:06:40
  Speaker 5: you know, I'm going to wait till he's awake.
• 1:06:41
  Speaker 3: No, no, because every time he's awake, he yells at you. Yeah,
• 1:06:44
  Speaker 3: this is very like toxic.
• 1:06:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:06:47
  Speaker 3: So I went in my room and locked myself in.
• 1:06:49
  Speaker 3: In the morning, he was gone. It was a terrible
• 1:06:51
  Speaker 3: night and I felt incredibly unsafe. But in a way,
• 1:06:54
  Speaker 3: I'm glad it happened because now there is not a
• 1:06:56
  Speaker 3: single doubt in my mind that this has to end
• 1:06:58
  Speaker 3: right now. Change your locks. Change your locks. I let
• 1:07:03
  Speaker 3: my landlady know and she is changing the locks.
• 1:07:05
  Speaker 2: Change your locks.
• 1:07:07
  Speaker 3: Oh, change your locks. She lives upstairs so I can
• 1:07:11
  Speaker 3: get the key when I get home. I'm also going
• 1:07:12
  Speaker 3: to have her with me when he comes to get
• 1:07:14
  Speaker 3: the rest of his crap. I can't just throw it
• 1:07:16
  Speaker 3: outside because he has musical stuff and it rains a
• 1:07:19
  Speaker 3: lot here. And also someone would inevitably steal stuff left
• 1:07:22
  Speaker 3: outside for more than a little while. And that's the
• 1:07:24
  Speaker 3: end of that story. I don't care if all of
• 1:07:26
  Speaker 3: his stuff gets stolen. He stinks. He's a stinky man, baby.
• 1:07:30
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:07:31
  Speaker 5: And also to make you feel bad about housing someone
• 1:07:34
  Speaker 5: and paying for them.
• 1:07:35
  Speaker 3: How dare you?
• 1:07:37
  Speaker 4: Bye.
• 1:07:39
  Speaker 3: I'm glad that your mutual friend was on your side.
• 1:07:41
  Speaker 3: I was a little worried that he would have poisoned
• 1:07:43
  Speaker 3: everyone against you.
• 1:07:44
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 1:07:45
  Speaker 3: But it seems like he's a little too crazy. And
• 1:07:48
  Speaker 3: people are like, that doesn't sound real. Exactly. So good riddance.
• 1:07:52
  Speaker 3: But that's the end of that story. And we got
• 1:07:53
  Speaker 3: another one coming right up. My boyfriend lied about being
• 1:07:57
  Speaker 3: married for months. Then his wife got pregnant. Ooh, bad timing.
• 1:08:01
  Speaker 5: I met this guy in a bar about a year
• 1:08:03
  Speaker 5: ago and we hooked up. We started regularly having spicy
• 1:08:07
  Speaker 5: sleep and things progressed from friends with benefits to a relationship. However,
• 1:08:10
  Speaker 5: a couple months into our relationship, he revealed to me
• 1:08:13
  Speaker 5: he was married.
• 1:08:15
  Speaker 3: Oh, come on, dude. And that's when I go, well,
• 1:08:20
  Speaker 3: what's your wife's name and phone number? No reason. How
• 1:08:23
  Speaker 3: do you do that? Yeah, I don't know. That's crazy.
• 1:08:26
  Speaker 5: He convinced me that their marriage was unhappy. He planned
• 1:08:29
  Speaker 5: on leaving her soon and how much he loved me.
• 1:08:32
  Speaker 5: Instead of doing the sensible thing and walking away, I
• 1:08:34
  Speaker 5: stayed with him. I had fallen for him really hard,
• 1:08:37
  Speaker 5: though I stayed as the other woman. A few months
• 1:08:40
  Speaker 5: further on, he told me he had left her, but
• 1:08:43
  Speaker 5: for now they were staying living together for convenience. I
• 1:08:46
  Speaker 5: know I was stupid to believe this, but I did.
• 1:08:49
  Speaker 5: There were other little red flags that I just blocked out,
• 1:08:51
  Speaker 5: such as only ever meeting one of his friends, but
• 1:08:54
  Speaker 5: he would tell me constantly how much he loved me
• 1:08:57
  Speaker 5: and we would be together properly when his divorce was
• 1:09:00
  Speaker 5: finalized I did truly love him and believed everything would
• 1:09:03
  Speaker 5: be okay and kind of understood why he didn't want
• 1:09:06
  Speaker 5: people to know until the divorce was final I met
• 1:09:08
  Speaker 5: with him at the weekend and he delivered some crushing news.
• 1:09:12
  Speaker 5: His wife was pregnant, and he was ending it with
• 1:09:14
  Speaker 5: me because he has to focus on her and his child. This,
• 1:09:17
  Speaker 5: of course, revealed that he had never left his wife
• 1:09:20
  Speaker 5: and probably never had any.
• 1:09:22
  Speaker 3: Intention of doing so.
• 1:09:23
  Speaker 5: The whole divorce thing was a lie, and he had
• 1:09:25
  Speaker 5: been stringing me along for months. I know I should
• 1:09:28
  Speaker 5: never have gotten involved with a married man, but it's
• 1:09:30
  Speaker 5: too late now, and I will regret it for a
• 1:09:32
  Speaker 5: long time.
• 1:09:33
  Speaker 3: By the way, this comes from Trueway.
• 1:09:36
  Speaker 5: 19 and if you want to spend your own stories
• 1:09:39
  Speaker 5: go to the r slash okay story time subreddit i'm
• 1:09:41
  Speaker 5: savannah i'm sophia and we're here to tell you some
• 1:09:43
  Speaker 5: stuff gets you some advice but we don't have all
• 1:09:46
  Speaker 5: your answers you only tell you what we would do
• 1:09:48
  Speaker 5: but let us know what you would do down in
• 1:09:49
  Speaker 5: the comments my question is do i tell his wife
• 1:09:52
  Speaker 5: i suppose he has done the right thing now by
• 1:09:54
  Speaker 5: getting rid of me but i still feel awful about
• 1:09:57
  Speaker 5: the whole thing i do kind of want to tell
• 1:09:59
  Speaker 5: her but i don't know if that's just because i
• 1:10:01
  Speaker 5: want to spend But she obviously doesn't deserve this and
• 1:10:04
  Speaker 5: I don't know whether telling a pregnant woman what her
• 1:10:07
  Speaker 5: husband has done is the right thing to do.
• 1:10:09
  Speaker 3: You should tell. You should tell her. Tell her. Don't
• 1:10:12
  Speaker 3: be the a-hole. I mean, you already are the a-hole. Yeah,
• 1:10:14
  Speaker 3: but don't be more of an a-hole. Don't be more.
• 1:10:17
  Speaker 3: Tell her before she gives birth to this child. Yeah,
• 1:10:19
  Speaker 3: be a little less a-holey. Yeah. And also, when she
• 1:10:23
  Speaker 3: inevitably leaves him. Don't you go for it. That's what
• 1:10:26
  Speaker 3: I was going to say. I'm like, yes, tell her
• 1:10:28
  Speaker 3: regardless of, you know, what the consequences are. But also
• 1:10:32
  Speaker 3: don't do that with the mindset of, oh, if she
• 1:10:36
  Speaker 3: leaves him, then he's free for me. Like, don't do that.
• 1:10:40
  Speaker 3: That's going to be way worse. Yeah. Edit.
• 1:10:42
  Speaker 5: So the consensus seems to be I should tell her.
• 1:10:46
  Speaker 5: How do I go about this? Is there any way
• 1:10:48
  Speaker 5: to this gentleman?
• 1:10:50
  Speaker 3: I mean, honestly, if you want just anonymous. Yeah, you
• 1:10:53
  Speaker 3: can send, you know, like a letter, email. I don't
• 1:10:56
  Speaker 3: know what information you have. Yeah.
• 1:10:58
  Speaker 5: But, you know, if he has socials, go through his socials.
• 1:11:01
  Speaker 5: I'm sure he's friends with his wife on it. I'm
• 1:11:03
  Speaker 5: sure he probably posts with his wife.
• 1:11:04
  Speaker 3: You'll find her. Yeah.
• 1:11:05
  Speaker 5: The majority of replies stated that it was best for
• 1:11:08
  Speaker 5: me to tell her regardless of my motivation for doing it.
• 1:11:11
  Speaker 5: And I found the replies from some of you really helpful.
• 1:11:13
  Speaker 3: So thank you.
• 1:11:14
  Speaker 5: I did have some responses saying I should just walk
• 1:11:16
  Speaker 5: away and leave it. These were valid points, but I
• 1:11:18
  Speaker 5: still thought I would want to know if I was her.
• 1:11:20
  Speaker 5: Though I decided to wait a little. I was still
• 1:11:22
  Speaker 5: intending to tell her, but I thought it was best
• 1:11:25
  Speaker 5: for me to cool down a little. work out how
• 1:11:27
  Speaker 5: I was going to tell her and gather evidence. I
• 1:11:29
  Speaker 5: didn't want to come across as some crazy scorned mistress.
• 1:11:32
  Speaker 5: I was pretty sure I found her on Facebook and LinkedIn,
• 1:11:35
  Speaker 5: which gave me her email address. I decided it was
• 1:11:37
  Speaker 5: best to do it via email. I don't know how
• 1:11:39
  Speaker 5: many times I wrote something out, but I just didn't
• 1:11:41
  Speaker 5: know how to word it. Anyway, a couple days after
• 1:11:44
  Speaker 5: my original post, I still hadn't told her when I
• 1:11:46
  Speaker 5: got a text from him. I hope you're doing okay.
• 1:11:48
  Speaker 5: I know this isn't easy for you, but it isn't
• 1:11:50
  Speaker 5: easy for me either. I do miss you, but I
• 1:11:52
  Speaker 5: hope you understand why I have done this. This probably
• 1:11:55
  Speaker 5: doesn't help, but my feelings for you were real and
• 1:11:57
  Speaker 5: I'm sorry. In some ways, I appreciated an apology, but
• 1:12:00
  Speaker 5: it also left me in more of a mess. All
• 1:12:03
  Speaker 5: I wanted to do was reply, but I stopped myself.
• 1:12:05
  Speaker 5: Maybe this is a little weird, but I went for
• 1:12:07
  Speaker 5: a run as it gave me a chance to leave
• 1:12:09
  Speaker 5: my house. leave my phone and think without any distractions.
• 1:12:12
  Speaker 5: It made me realize he obviously isn't really that committed
• 1:12:15
  Speaker 5: to her if he is texting me again within days
• 1:12:18
  Speaker 5: and he is a manipulative liar.
• 1:12:20
  Speaker 3: Yeah, he's not committed to her. He's been cheating with
• 1:12:23
  Speaker 3: you for months.
• 1:12:24
  Speaker 5: Girl, if a run makes you think clearly, run for
• 1:12:27
  Speaker 5: as long as you can.
• 1:12:28
  Speaker 3: Run longer.
• 1:12:29
  Speaker 5: It gave me the push I needed to actually tell her.
• 1:12:32
  Speaker 5: My initial email just asked her if she was married
• 1:12:35
  Speaker 5: to him because I wasn't 100% sure I had the
• 1:12:38
  Speaker 5: right person and that I really needed to talk to her.
• 1:12:40
  Speaker 5: She replied only, are you the sloot who effed my husband?
• 1:12:45
  Speaker 5: Why the eff are you contacting me now? So she
• 1:12:47
  Speaker 5: already knew about me. I had no idea what to reply,
• 1:12:51
  Speaker 5: but I apologized and told my side of the story.
• 1:12:53
  Speaker 5: It then became clear that she had found out months
• 1:12:55
  Speaker 5: ago and he had told her he had ended it
• 1:12:58
  Speaker 5: with me.
• 1:13:00
  Speaker 3: Wow, so he's playing both sides.
• 1:13:03
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:13:03
  Speaker 3: What a weird situation we got here. We're so shocked. Oh,
• 1:13:08
  Speaker 3: my goodness. He's just a silly, silly guy.
• 1:13:10
  Speaker 1: Yeah, wow.
• 1:13:11
  Speaker 3: He doesn't know any better. He's just a little guy. Oh,
• 1:13:14
  Speaker 3: he's a little nifty little liar. He goes, did I
• 1:13:16
  Speaker 3: do that?
• 1:13:17
  Speaker 1: Oh.
• 1:13:18
  Speaker 3: I think this was around the time he told me he.
• 1:13:20
  Speaker 5: Had left her because things did get a little weird
• 1:13:23
  Speaker 5: with us then. I just put this down to the
• 1:13:25
  Speaker 5: fact he had left his wife. Never once did he
• 1:13:28
  Speaker 5: try to break up with me. Initially, she was quite
• 1:13:31
  Speaker 5: aggressive towards me, understandably, but I could quite easily prove
• 1:13:34
  Speaker 5: that he had convinced me they had broken up. It
• 1:13:36
  Speaker 5: is obvious that his line was way effing worse than
• 1:13:39
  Speaker 5: I thought.
• 1:13:39
  Speaker 3: Final thoughts? I mean... I think everyone here sucks. Yeah,
• 1:13:43
  Speaker 3: everyone sucks here except for the wife. Sorry about that,
• 1:13:46
  Speaker 3: girly pop. I hope you and your baby are good. Yeah.
• 1:13:50
  Speaker 3: Take this guy for all he's worth.
• 1:13:51
  Speaker 5: Yeah take all his money yeah that evening he turned
• 1:13:54
  Speaker 5: up at my place she had punted him out and
• 1:13:57
  Speaker 5: he wanted to stay with me there was no way
• 1:14:00
  Speaker 5: i was letting him in so we had an embarrassing
• 1:14:03
  Speaker 5: argument outside anyway he left eventually and i haven't heard
• 1:14:06
  Speaker 5: anything from either of them since maybe she'll take him
• 1:14:08
  Speaker 5: back because she obviously had before but i don't know
• 1:14:12
  Speaker 5: i know some people think i was only doing this
• 1:14:14
  Speaker 5: to clear my conscience and spite him which may be
• 1:14:17
  Speaker 5: partially true, but I don't feel any better. I feel
• 1:14:20
  Speaker 5: awful knowing I have contributed to all this and effing
• 1:14:23
  Speaker 5: up all these lives, though I know I probably only
• 1:14:25
  Speaker 5: feel a fraction of what she is feeling. I regret
• 1:14:28
  Speaker 5: a lot of what I've done, but I don't regret
• 1:14:31
  Speaker 5: telling her. It was tempting to just walk away from
• 1:14:33
  Speaker 5: it all, but I know if I was her, I
• 1:14:35
  Speaker 5: would want to know.
• 1:14:36
  Speaker 3: Well, you did the right thing in the end, even
• 1:14:38
  Speaker 3: though you did the wrong thing in the beginning. Yeah,
• 1:14:39
  Speaker 3: it took you a while to get there. You got
• 1:14:41
  Speaker 3: off track, but.
• 1:14:43
  Speaker 5: You know, we started on the trail, got farther and farther,
• 1:14:46
  Speaker 5: and now we're back on.
• 1:14:48
  Speaker 3: Now we're back on. Everything's fine and dandy-ish.
• 1:14:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:14:51
  Speaker 3: Just stay away from him. Stay away from her. Don't
• 1:14:54
  Speaker 3: get involved with other married men.
• 1:14:55
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:14:56
  Speaker 3: But that's the end of that story, and we got
• 1:14:57
  Speaker 3: one more coming up for y'all.
• 1:14:59
  Speaker 2: Hey, it's Dakota, your favorite goofball host here. And we're
• 1:15:03
  Speaker 2: going to get back to the stories, but here's three
• 1:15:05
  Speaker 2: minutes of ads from our sponsors.
• 1:15:07
  Speaker 3: My partner left me outside for hours, then called me dramatic. Uh,
• 1:15:12
  Speaker 3: excuse me? My partner dropped me off at my mom's
• 1:15:15
  Speaker 3: at 1 p.m. He was going to go see his
• 1:15:17
  Speaker 3: friend to have lunch and then come back to my
• 1:15:19
  Speaker 3: mom so we could all spend a little time together.
• 1:15:21
  Speaker 3: It's 9 and he still hasn't left. My mom sleeps early.
• 1:15:24
  Speaker 3: It's 10 now and he still hasn't left. But I
• 1:15:27
  Speaker 3: have to leave, so I explain to him, look, I
• 1:15:29
  Speaker 3: gotta leave because my mom needs to lock her door.
• 1:15:31
  Speaker 3: Bear in mind, he lost a set of our keys,
• 1:15:34
  Speaker 3: so he has the only keys. He says he left
• 1:15:36
  Speaker 3: and then 10 minutes later messages me that he's only
• 1:15:39
  Speaker 3: 44 minutes away. So I get a cab home. I
• 1:15:42
  Speaker 3: finally get home and call him and he still hasn't left.
• 1:15:45
  Speaker 3: I live in extremely, extremely rough area. He thinks it's
• 1:15:48
  Speaker 3: funny and is laughing on the phone. I lose my crap.
• 1:15:52
  Speaker 3: out and now it's 12 and he still hasn't left
• 1:15:55
  Speaker 3: i'm still waiting outside so i broke up with him
• 1:15:57
  Speaker 3: he's forcing me to send him proof i'm actually outside
• 1:16:00
  Speaker 3: which i am and i just found that even weirder
• 1:16:03
  Speaker 3: my phone's passing away i don't live locally to anyone
• 1:16:05
  Speaker 3: i know it's 12 40 so i knock on the
• 1:16:08
  Speaker 3: neighbor's door and ask if i can climb the garden
• 1:16:10
  Speaker 3: fence as i knew i had left the garden door
• 1:16:12
  Speaker 3: unlocked they let me thankfully i pack all my partner's
• 1:16:15
  Speaker 3: stuff in bin bags by the way this comes from
• 1:16:17
  Speaker 3: secret key 2124 And if you want to submit your
• 1:16:20
  Speaker 3: own stories, go to the r slash okay story time subreddit.
• 1:16:22
  Speaker 3: I'm Sophia. And I'm Savannah. And we're here to give
• 1:16:25
  Speaker 3: good advice goofily, but we don't have all the answers.
• 1:16:27
  Speaker 3: We only know what we do. So let us know
• 1:16:28
  Speaker 3: what you would do in the comments. He has the
• 1:16:30
  Speaker 3: nerve to come home at 2 a.m. and call me
• 1:16:32
  Speaker 3: childish and then say, it's not like I was cheating.
• 1:16:34
  Speaker 3: I was just with my friends. My problem isn't that
• 1:16:37
  Speaker 3: he was with his friends. My problem is that he
• 1:16:39
  Speaker 3: left me outside alone, knowing I was alone in a bad,
• 1:16:42
  Speaker 3: bad area for three hours. And if I had knocked
• 1:16:45
  Speaker 3: on the neighbor's door, I would have been outside until two.
• 1:16:47
  Speaker 4: Are you for real?
• 1:16:48
  Speaker 3: And he also got upset I involved the neighbors. Dude,
• 1:16:51
  Speaker 3: what am I supposed to do?
• 1:16:51
  Speaker 1: I can't get in the house.
• 1:16:53
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I, for real, I would have Ubered back somewhere.
• 1:16:56
  Speaker 3: Or I would have called like a locksmith or something.
• 1:16:58
  Speaker 3: I don't know.
• 1:16:59
  Speaker 2: OP.
• 1:17:00
  Speaker 3: Good job with the breakup. That's good. Yeah, I support that.
• 1:17:03
  Speaker 3: I do think that maybe self-preservation skills need to go up.
• 1:17:07
  Speaker 3: I would not have waited three hours there, especially if
• 1:17:09
  Speaker 3: my phone was dead. I would have called someone else.
• 1:17:12
  Speaker 3: Am I being dramatic or is it not really a
• 1:17:14
  Speaker 3: bad thing to do to someone you claim to love
• 1:17:16
  Speaker 3: and care for? Because I would never do that. And
• 1:17:18
  Speaker 3: we do have an edit. What do you think? Definitely
• 1:17:20
  Speaker 3: break up.
• 1:17:20
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:17:21
  Speaker 1: Gone.
• 1:17:21
  Speaker 2: Bye.
• 1:17:21
  Speaker 3: This guy has clearly no cause of concern for you.
• 1:17:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:17:25
  Speaker 3: Just like absolutely no sense of urgency to make sure
• 1:17:29
  Speaker 3: you're in the house. Ridiculous.
• 1:17:31
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:17:31
  Speaker 5: A real man would be like, oh, here, take my
• 1:17:35
  Speaker 5: key because, you know, you're going to be home before
• 1:17:37
  Speaker 5: me and all this stuff. Or a real man would
• 1:17:41
  Speaker 5: have actually freaking communicated what time he was coming Yes,
• 1:17:44
  Speaker 5: so you didn't leave your mom's house.
• 1:17:45
  Speaker 3: I don't know. I just want to thank you all
• 1:17:47
  Speaker 3: so much for your responses and for taking your own
• 1:17:49
  Speaker 3: time out of your day to respond to me and
• 1:17:51
  Speaker 3: make my feelings feel validated. As sometimes I can genuinely
• 1:17:54
  Speaker 3: be a fool and in the past have been very
• 1:17:56
  Speaker 3: quick to forgive. I will not go back. And thank
• 1:17:58
  Speaker 3: you for ensuring I wasn't dramatic. As I was starting
• 1:18:01
  Speaker 3: to feel that maybe I did overreact, but it's clear
• 1:18:03
  Speaker 3: as day I didn't. And my two year relationship genuinely
• 1:18:06
  Speaker 3: meant nothing. He finally woke up and started to apologize.
• 1:18:10
  Speaker 3: I told him he didn't even know why he was apologizing.
• 1:18:12
  Speaker 3: And he went on to say I'm just possessive, controlling
• 1:18:15
  Speaker 3: and dramatic. That I shouldn't have messaged him that many
• 1:18:17
  Speaker 3: times or called that many times. It's not because you
• 1:18:19
  Speaker 3: were cheating. She didn't think that. Yeah. She needed to
• 1:18:22
  Speaker 3: get in the house. That's the only reason she's pestering you.
• 1:18:25
  Speaker 3: I mean, come on. It's like if you had, I
• 1:18:27
  Speaker 3: feel like if you broke your arm or injured yourself
• 1:18:30
  Speaker 3: or something, you'd be like, oh my God, hello, hello, hello.
• 1:18:32
  Speaker 3: Can you help me? I'm in danger and he'd be like,
• 1:18:34
  Speaker 3: stop texting me.
• 1:18:36
  Speaker 2: I'm not cheating.
• 1:18:37
  Speaker 3: God. So needy. I just said whatever. I can't be
• 1:18:41
  Speaker 3: asked to argue. I'm dramatic.
• 1:18:43
  Speaker 4: I'm dramatic.
• 1:18:43
  Speaker 3: This is why your apologies mean nothing. Because you apologize
• 1:18:46
  Speaker 3: and then blame me regardless. But we're finished. So you
• 1:18:49
  Speaker 3: don't have to worry about being. controlling or possessive anymore
• 1:18:51
  Speaker 3: you go your way and i'll go mine mic drop
• 1:18:54
  Speaker 3: that was nice i love to see it yeah screw
• 1:18:58
  Speaker 3: that guy whatever he doesn't care for you no and
• 1:19:00
  Speaker 3: you don't have to care for him Yeah. End of story.
• 1:19:03
  Speaker 4: It's over.
• 1:19:03
  Speaker 3: You can go find another friend to hang out with.
• 1:19:06
  Speaker 3: And I bet he was cheating, honestly. But that's the
• 1:19:08
  Speaker 3: end of that story and the end of the episode.