Latest / We Don't Smoke the Same / #375 We Don't LIVE IN A VAN the Same with Guy Reuven

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#375 We Don't LIVE IN A VAN the Same with Guy Reuven · We Don't Smoke the Same

• 0:00
  What's up? What's up? What's up? Is Friday morning. It's been
• 0:04
  a while since we did a public service announcement. We don't smoke the same
• 0:07
  family, Sure boy Xtreme marks the spot and just letting y'all know that's right.
• 0:12
  Sold out October fourteen, sold out three hundred people. That's say craft
• 0:16
  Beer Kings. It's going down. You're missing now, you missed out.
• 0:19
  I think there's some VIP boxes left. Go over there. You can still
• 0:22
  pull up, but you just can't sign up. You're gonna have to do
• 0:24
  parking, street parking. But yeah, Tober fourteen is gonna be fucking fourteen
• 0:28
  days from now. Thirty vendors, twenty percent off, the whole store,
• 0:32
  smoking section, you name it. We're all gonna be there, all the
• 0:35
  patron subscribers, a lot of y'allfolk is gonna be there and it just want
• 0:39
  to do a quick public service announcement for y'all. We had a great week.
• 0:43
  We had Reverie, we have Josh, we had Guy Gary. It
• 0:47
  was dope, it was fun and yeah again for five bucks, you can
• 0:52
  watch these lives. No commercials do we do Collins giveaways. It's a good
• 0:56
  time. We got some dope guests lined up for you, and we participated
• 0:59
  a lot on the patron and then he's only got his blogs and shit,
• 1:03
  and trust me, for five bucks, it's worth it. We also got
• 1:06
  a thirty dollars tier. You get one limited We Don't Smoke the Same merch
• 1:11
  a month, one of month hats, bucket hats, t shirts, the
• 1:17
  hit kids, it's dope. You get some dope action over there for thirty
• 1:19
  bucks. And we got one hundred dollars boxes, but those are sold loud,
• 1:23
  so don't worry about that. Tune in. Tune in. Sometimes someone
• 1:26
  drops off one hundred dollar box and you better be ready to pull the trigger.
• 1:30
  But that's sold out outs of now. And we just want to say
• 1:32
  thank you all three hundred and twenty of y'all. We growing, we growing,
• 1:37
  and mad Love, Mad Love, enjoy this episode. This shit was
• 1:40
  funny. The homie lives in a fucking RV dog he want not out here
• 1:44
  in la. Enjoy this episode, Mad Love. Welcome back to another episode
• 1:49
  of that We Don't Smoke the Same podcast. Thank you so much for joining
• 1:53
  us here on the Waking Bake, and thank you so much for you know,
• 1:56
  I guess taking that break on Saturday, because you know what I'm saying,
• 2:00
  We're gonna make up for it on Thursday, though, I'll tell you
• 2:01
  that much. Tomorrow is a jam pack day. I'll be here all day,
• 2:05
  including We'll be here all day, including since the morning till the afternoon.
• 2:07
  So I mean, today's just like the appetizer to to like the main
• 2:12
  course that's going down tomorrow because it's gonna be a pack day. I mean,
• 2:15
  at least at least for me. So we're gonna set it off right
• 2:19
  joining me is my toxic ass co Holts. What's going on next? Geet
• 2:22
  up? What's up? Dog? Yeah? I'm excited for tomorrow, Double
• 2:24
  double Book. We got Reverie on. She's always cool and then she just
• 2:29
  did Sharp Tank, so I want to see I want to see what's up.
• 2:31
  I was watching the episode. I feel like we was in the show's
• 2:35
  Shark Tank. No, it was not Shark Tank. It's Sharp Tank,
• 2:37
  Sharp Tank. Sharp the pimp. You know who that is. He's an
• 2:40
  X pimp. I don't respect you. Damn. Is this your guests like
• 2:44
  tomorrow, Reverie? Are these your guests? Yeah? Yeah, yeah dude.
• 2:47
  Now I feel like a puny ass little guest, like, oh,
• 2:50
  this is our appetizer here, y'all see the skinny ass you are. The
• 2:53
  big ass knows he's just for practice. Well, I mean like I'm like
• 3:00
  the fat girl you fuck before the real day shows up, you know what
• 3:02
  I mean? Like you can last longer. Yeah? Yeah, this guy.
• 3:08
  Yeah. But with that being said, let's let's introduce our guests,
• 3:12
  the one and only guy Reuben or you got it? You got it?
• 3:15
  But look all right, hell yeah baby, what's going on? Man?
• 3:20
  Dude? It's lit damn gang you pull you pulled up in a band dog
• 3:23
  like a legit like Rambo type of bans. Why don't you get so many
• 3:28
  school buzzes here? Bro, I gotta drop off the kids, you know
• 3:30
  what I mean? Now? Are you? Are you originally from Cali?
• 3:36
  Yeah? I was all right. I was born in uh like in Israel,
• 3:40
  but like I grew up in like the North Bay, so like the
• 3:43
  South Bay of the Bay, you know the Bay area he said, Israel.
• 3:46
  Yeah, yeah, like there's a bay at Israel. No, no,
• 3:50
  like like like San Francisco, Like I was born in Israel. But
• 3:53
  I was like, okay, I was, I was like what bays b
• 3:57
  Yeah, Palestine by baby, That's what I was. Yeah, all right,
• 4:00
  so how how long? But you just you just bored over there automatically
• 4:04
  came over here with your parents automatically, bro. You know, so dude,
• 4:08
  they were just like, hey, we're moving. I was like bad,
• 4:10
  like and I was a kid, you know, I didn't really know
• 4:13
  what that was going on. I was just doing it. Have you gone
• 4:15
  back? Yeah? I go back every now and then, like a few
• 4:17
  years, so I actually started stand up there. So it was I heard
• 4:21
  it's I heard there's like a scene out there too in Israel. Yeah,
• 4:25
  yeah, because it's like you know, you have you have like a perception
• 4:28
  of it, but it's like there's a lot of like low key ship that
• 4:30
  people don't really take the accountability. Like weed's big over there. These motherfuckers
• 4:34
  are really big on like like actual weed research, like like like helping solf
• 4:40
  cancer type of shit, and you're like, what the fuck did Jews Like?
• 4:44
  Yeah, bro, they got like some crazy like they were the first
• 4:46
  ones to really be up on like the fucking tumor or treatment with oils and
• 4:47
  shit like do you know a lot of juice? No, I'm not that
• 4:50
  rich here, dog, I know one, and I know one and it's
• 4:54
  only and I met him because of it. But Archapear is the only Jew
• 4:58
  I know. Hey, now you know too, bro? Yeah so you
• 5:00
  Jewish Jewish like you did the whole Bro, look at my nose. I
• 5:03
  know, I know, I know, but did you do? That's what
• 5:06
  I wanted? Yeah? How later on those things? I was when I
• 5:11
  was younger, Bro, I was like, fuck, you're kee sing it.
• 5:13
  I was like, I wish I had a Jewish friend. Bro.
• 5:15
  Yeah, Bro, thirteen, dude, you just make all that money.
• 5:17
  Bro, everyone's throwing candy at you. You're like the star. Bro.
• 5:19
  How much was it? You don't mind knowing how much you racking that?
• 5:23
  Dude? I don't even remember a small business, but yeah it is.
• 5:27
  They're like, hey, learn all these words on a book nobody cares about.
• 5:30
  Read it, and we'll give you three thousand dollars. And that's that's
• 5:32
  a steal. As a kid, I wouldn't memorized the Bible, dude.
• 5:38
  I remember negotiating with my grandma bro, because like one of my grandma's gave
• 5:41
  me like two thousand and the other one gave me like four hundred bucks.
• 5:44
  And I was like, oh, yeah. I'm like, I'm like,
• 5:46
  well, uncle Rachel just gave me two geez, like what it? What's
• 5:48
  up? And my grandma was like like all right, I'll give you five
• 5:50
  hundred. I'm like, you broke, bitch, like my fucking money.
• 5:55
  That's how I knew I was Jewish. Bro, when I started like hustling
• 5:58
  my grandma's bro, I was like, oh, give me this money right
• 6:00
  now, you know, I guess I mean when you look at it,
• 6:03
  you're just like, like, Grandma's not not really doing much with it.
• 6:08
  Yeah, I guess, like you know, like a lot of like you
• 6:11
  know how like what's the what's what's the black guyed version of doing that?
• 6:13
  Co signed for this charge for Grandma, I swear, bro, that's like
• 6:16
  the black eyed version of that. Bro. They don't look look white people
• 6:19
  have sweet sixteens Mexicans, Jewish people have bart mitzuz, what do black people
• 6:26
  have Grandma co signing for that brand? They have Martin Luther King Junior day.
• 6:30
  Yeah, I was sucked up. They need some bro. They have
• 6:36
  like a day off, Bro, they got a whole month off, but
• 6:40
  that doesn't that's a day for them, is what I mean? Like,
• 6:43
  do they have they share a month like with the gays. No, dude,
• 6:46
  that's a whole different one. Dude, we're not on patron doc.
• 6:48
  I don't know. I'm not. I'm just saying they got like I'm not.
• 6:53
  I'm not saying it's made up. Brother, this happened. But they
• 6:55
  got a day, they got, they got two days, they got juneteen.
• 6:59
  But these are all for the race I'm talking to. They get a
• 7:00
  day for them like bart Mitts. Fuck, it's the day for you,
• 7:04
  the day you become a Jewish kea, it's become when something day you become
• 7:08
  a Jewish is a man, because yeah, hold, bro, you don't
• 7:13
  become a Jewish. Bro, you been you been well. First of all,
• 7:15
  you said it weird too, Bro, like you dilected, How do
• 7:19
  you say it? Will you become Jewish when they cut your dick? Bro,
• 7:23
  that's when you become Jewish. But you're you're Jewish. No, dude,
• 7:27
  bye, I've got your cut. I am not cut on Mexican Xavier?
• 7:34
  What made you? What made you that? I'm cut? You're born
• 7:38
  in America? What people born in America? They cut it? Let even
• 7:40
  ask. Yeah, but I'm also fucking Latino. I was like my parents.
• 7:43
  Yeah, it's like, what the fun you have ever speak on my
• 7:45
  dick? So we got the hood on, but like Trevin Martin, Yeah,
• 7:48
  your dick is about a mug someone brood on, it's about to rob
• 7:53
  you, like pull a pussy out your dicks, like give me on your
• 7:56
  fucking vagina. I don't know. When I was younger, I just thought
• 7:59
  my dick look like Alf. Give me your pushy here. Yeah, like
• 8:01
  you know, because like you know, when you're literally like what the fuck
• 8:03
  is this? What's Alf? That alien sitcom? He like he just he
• 8:07
  was like this put oh wait from American dad? He has one He's he
• 8:13
  didn't know Siper Hill. Bro, why does that look like me? Dog?
• 8:16
  What the fuck looks like? Bro? What the hell? Bro?
• 8:20
  Get this dude out of here. Brous my double ganger dode, I'll be
• 8:24
  realized funck right now, dude, Dude, you guys have been smoking for
• 8:28
  the past like five teen minutes. I think I'm higher than both of y'all.
• 8:31
  Bro, Dude, it's about to be Why do you think there's no
• 8:35
  smoking here? Bro? My nose is taking in all of it. Bro,
• 8:37
  you're not gonna be able to hotbox this play. Why don't you It's
• 8:41
  like a filter. Nose is a vacuum. Yeah. The reason you don't
• 8:45
  the one it's not even smoking, bro, the one drug you don't want
• 8:48
  to do with this guy's coke. The fucking sack is gone. Yeah,
• 8:52
  I'm gonna need like triple your dose to like get as get as fucking coked
• 8:56
  out with you. I wouldn't even get mad though, Like when we were
• 8:58
  doing like I've been like, well, dude's nose it's pretty big. I'd
• 9:00
  be like you just yeah, yeah, Like I'd be like, I don't
• 9:03
  even think he meant to snort that hard food. Just give him a big
• 9:05
  line, you know. Yeah. You know what's funny, after the end
• 9:09
  of the night, you can scrape his nose off and do a whole line
• 9:11
  like that to do that's left over because you always got some residue. You
• 9:16
  wake up in the morning, blow your eyes, you blow your nose.
• 9:18
  You're like, oh man, that would be the worst. I mean,
• 9:20
  if I'm almost about to be a year sober, no, I know,
• 9:24
  congrats, I know that's just been a long time. I had to stop,
• 9:28
  but I was going to kill myself at some point with what just like
• 9:31
  because I would rever done cocaine broight here. It's like you mix it with
• 9:35
  alcohol and you just if it has fent, you'll die. That's that's really
• 9:37
  what what kills a lot of people. It's like because you know it goes
• 9:41
  hand in hand. You're drinking and then you're like all right, I need
• 9:43
  to come up. But because some people decided to cut it with fent,
• 9:46
  like just a little bit with alcohol, just combination. If you were to
• 9:50
  just not drink and you were to just do a bag that has fent,
• 9:52
  you'd probably survived. That's fucking wild. But it's like the moment you were
• 9:56
  to be like such a big risk, yeah, because you don't I know,
• 10:00
  it's sitting there, bro, you know what I mean. I mean,
• 10:01
  but that's the reason. Like because we were doing socially, we just
• 10:03
  do it like that was times we just be doing like venders going to the
• 10:07
  comedy store and just kicking it, bro, like just hanging out, just
• 10:09
  doing all kinds of shit. And then at some point I'm just like,
• 10:13
  oh man, we just like it was wek Xavier. So I have a
• 10:18
  question for you then, So like uh, what what how did fen all
• 10:22
  even get in America? Like why why do you why do these people?
• 10:24
  Right? But like why do why do dealers even even lace their shit with
• 10:28
  fennol? Like what's like the main purpose? Is it like more about the
• 10:31
  money or what is it more about? To be honest, like it's cheapest
• 10:35
  to make, but it's just like it's it's not even it's not even the
• 10:39
  fact that you're mixing in the coke. It's like a lot of these drug
• 10:41
  factories are making a couple more drugs and and the whole time. So sometimes
• 10:46
  you can't keep shit containing you. You you have fent to for the for
• 10:48
  the for the opiates like you like you, fent is used to cut like
• 10:52
  the heroine, like all the shit that brings you down, the Viking pills
• 10:56
  and all this shit that brings you down because it's a downer. It's it's
• 10:58
  an opiate. So it's like what I my my understanding is, I'm like
• 11:03
  same factory. All you need is a little bit some of the ship comes
• 11:05
  out contaminated and you don't really know because I don't really see, like,
• 11:09
  you know, drug organizations just like, Hey, I'm gonna kill off my
• 11:11
  clientele and stop making billions of dollars. Yeah, you're just not you just
• 11:16
  I just don't see why you're gonna kill him. Damn, bro, So
• 11:20
  is there is there a replacement for like so fen all is cheap and it's
• 11:24
  made to like cut down for the like yeah, yeah, so is there
• 11:31
  is there a version of that for fen and all? Like oh, look
• 11:33
  it's it's cathedral, bro, this is gonna yeah for people that are trying
• 11:37
  to get off. Like my friend he's he used to be addicted to opiates
• 11:39
  and he's, uh, he's on what does Sammy takes a boxy? Yeah,
• 11:43
  it's something like that. It's and it and the government will give it
• 11:46
  to you or boxy and it's like a pail that it's supposed to weem you
• 11:50
  off fen and stuff like that. Damn, Like, yeah, what what
• 11:56
  drugs have you done? I mean I did a lot. I smoked a
• 11:58
  lot of weed when I was in like a high school and like uh,
• 12:03
  and then after a while there was a point where I was I was also
• 12:07
  drinking, and then my sister like committed suicide and I was like, all
• 12:11
  right, I'm gonna turn it around, bruh, And I just never did
• 12:15
  anything again. She partying AND's like when she's nah, dude. She was
• 12:18
  a nerd dude, like she was like uh, like she was more of
• 12:20
  like a school girl like had her like friend group and ship, but she
• 12:24
  was certainly with depression. So she was like all right, dude, fuck
• 12:26
  this and like this, damn, that's wild, man. I can see
• 12:31
  why, why for sure that something like that would stop. It's like I
• 12:33
  have a cousin who like is my uncle. He's always been drinking, but
• 12:37
  none of us really knew the ugly side of really drinking. But except like
• 12:41
  my cousin really being there. And then you're just like, oh shit,
• 12:43
  Like I could see why you don't want to drink ever again, because you're
• 12:46
  like, you know, when you get get older, you're like, oh
• 12:50
  shit, you get you can just get You're like you don't want to fuck
• 12:52
  around with it. Yeah, dude, I fuck dude. I I feel
• 12:58
  like I've I've gotten all this smoke of my nose. I don't even know
• 13:01
  what I'm like thinking anymore. Oh wait, you're probably gonna be thinking about
• 13:05
  food. I will bruh, You're gonna keep seeing me much on this ginger,
• 13:11
  So I gotta ask you. We just talked about food. We didn't
• 13:13
  know you lived in the van, which is fucking dope. How do you
• 13:16
  handle just the bad that's just like a Stebo van. Yeah, like fucking
• 13:22
  like Ryan fucking van right there. How did you get it? Was that
• 13:24
  your goal to live there? Parents? Bro's yeah, I know that's what
• 13:31
  I'm Jewish bro. Money's good. Yeah sound nah. I was. I
• 13:39
  was living with like my my I was living at home and then I flew
• 13:43
  to Israel like after this is like after my sister passed. I was all
• 13:46
  right, I want to like experience shit, and I went to Israel and
• 13:50
  I did like this like uh this program and I was living on in a
• 13:54
  penthouse im like in the Guiney Towers, which is like the biggest like tower
• 13:58
  that when you to go back for free na, that's called a birth right.
• 14:03
  But no, I didn't do that. I did like an interest you
• 14:03
  to go back for free. Yeah, you can go back for free this.
• 14:07
  Yeah. That's how they try to lure you in, you know what
• 14:09
  I mean, because they want more people live in there, so they're like,
• 14:11
  yeah, they got money like that, like we just want to lure
• 14:15
  you in coming, yeah, bro, because then because then it's born in
• 14:18
  the wrong where glocks made from right there. Who buys glocks the whole world?
• 14:22
  Like, bro, No, but that's that's that's like they're willing to
• 14:24
  take that risk because if you stay there, you're gonna make the country a
• 14:26
  lot of money, you know what I mean? So so you go,
• 14:30
  so you go. So I just I just did an internship. I stayed
• 14:31
  there for like I was living on the thirty fourth floor and like you can
• 14:35
  see, like it was it felt like GTA because you can see like all
• 14:37
  the city. But man, it was so miserable, dude. And then
• 14:41
  I was I was like, dude, I want to live like for real.
• 14:43
  And then I bought my van and but it's like, dude, it's
• 14:48
  crazy, bro, while you were in Israel you bought it. Nah.
• 14:50
  I flew back to SF and then I and then I found the van in
• 14:54
  San Diego and I was like, dude, I'm gonna get this van.
• 14:56
  Get it for it looks uh. It was a pricing. Some of those
• 15:01
  are pricing. I've seen, like the super like fucking home. I'm asking
• 15:05
  like, like, what was the run? Though, I got a really
• 15:07
  good deal. It was he put it up for fourteen grand. That's now
• 15:13
  now something like that did you like, did you did you go did you
• 15:16
  do your research before You're like, yeah, bro, researched, dude,
• 15:22
  I researched it. Then I remodeled it, like rebuilt it a little bit.
• 15:24
  Yeah, some of them. That's a whole business now. Bro,
• 15:26
  there's companies out there. My phone be trying to pitch me shit like that,
• 15:30
  Like yeah, but I go to the parks a lot to go hiking.
• 15:31
  So like my phone every time I for this hiking. Check out this
• 15:35
  vand and band life. This is bad ass in the pep remodeling bro.
• 15:39
  Like it's the old ass van right, like you know, like the one
• 15:43
  Domass, the big one he pulls out. So somebody will fucking like cut
• 15:46
  that ship out and they'll put like a little sink. They'll put like a
• 15:48
  couch TV. It's fucking pamp dude. See the only issue with it,
• 15:52
  dude, is that like h Like I mean you you get like mugged or
• 15:58
  like like fucked with by a homeless like every week bro, like every other
• 16:03
  they do it to you. Bro. That's what dude. That's why I
• 16:04
  was late, bro, because dude, I parked in uh Like I was
• 16:08
  like, all right, I'm gonna park in downtown LA, so I can
• 16:11
  be in the area, bro. And I was just fucking kept falling upon
• 16:15
  these zombies dog and I was like, dude, fuck, I gotta find
• 16:18
  somewhere the park and I just I didn't find it, So I ended up
• 16:19
  parking and like the red zone where the hit me. My city is so
• 16:23
  so safe. You could have parked in his parking lot, yeah, Like
• 16:26
  I was like, I was like, if you were gonna be the guest,
• 16:27
  I would have told you. I was like, look, I opened
• 16:30
  the gates where the first was. Yeah, you could have. Like I
• 16:33
  would have just been like, look, just stay right here for the dyke
• 16:37
  na right, so you know, like where the metro bus pulls up and
• 16:40
  stops. I just parked there, dude. They were so pissed, like
• 16:42
  I just woke up to, like the bus keeps honking at me and shit,
• 16:45
  I was like, dude, fuck off, I'm trying to trying to
• 16:48
  get this sleep in. You got that's how you get around. I feel
• 16:52
  you, dude, Bro, that was the act. That's the problem.
• 16:55
  So my ac just broke. Dude, dude, it's wild and something good.
• 17:02
  Yeah, it's like living in an oven brook for real. At least
• 17:06
  you're not fat. I know, yeah, if you're fat. Like,
• 17:08
  like, if I like, if I lived in a van, dude,
• 17:11
  like a c would be my top priority. I'd be like, listen,
• 17:14
  yeah, tires kind of flat with AC's priming here. See that's the problem,
• 17:18
  bro, he dore's a lot of problems with your van. No,
• 17:19
  there is no, but that's the biggest one, is I Look, so
• 17:23
  I was in Sacramento for a show and I flew back like like yesterday,
• 17:27
  I think it was yesterday or no, two days ago. And when I
• 17:30
  landed, I I took it over to my van and I parked like in
• 17:33
  front of somebody's house, and I noticed that my tires were all flat.
• 17:38
  So like some somebody's angry homeowner got pissed that I parked like like in front
• 17:44
  of his house, on the side of his house and just fucking flat at
• 17:47
  all? My day? Why don't you pull up in a Walmart? You
• 17:48
  know Walmart too, though, No, dude, Like, the only issue
• 17:53
  with Walmart is like if I if I parked there, like, I mean,
• 17:57
  it was just one night, so I definitely could have. But the
• 18:00
  do you want part in front of these dude's houses that's where I usually park
• 18:02
  when I like fly burd Bank because it's like super clock. Every time you
• 18:06
  flat burt Bank, you can probably buy my path. They're super question the
• 18:08
  big as smart vs. It's right next to the car dealership, so they'll
• 18:11
  park the big ass like where they just tell them it's man, yeah wait
• 18:15
  nobody, Yeah, I'll hug you up broad yea if you're struggling like that,
• 18:18
  yeah, dude, because that's not what it was, dope, dude.
• 18:21
  The fucking guy pulled up like the triple A dude and he uh he
• 18:26
  like what's it called? Like, well, they didn't pop him, They
• 18:27
  just just apparently what he did was he opened the valve thing like I thought
• 18:32
  he slashed them all, but he opened the valve and then there was like
• 18:34
  there's like a little like you need a very special tool for this. But
• 18:37
  he like unscrewed the knob thing so all the air comes out. So he
• 18:41
  had to go to auto zone buy the tool. He probably hasn't fix it.
• 18:45
  He didn't even have it. He like he was such a special tool.
• 18:47
  He had to go drive buy it and come back and then he fixed
• 18:49
  it. So I got them tickets for my shell. I was like,
• 18:52
  yeah, you're lit fucking like nice. Do he hooked it up? Bro?
• 18:56
  Dude, that's fucking crazy. Like what do your parents think about you?
• 18:57
  Like me? They love me? Especially, Like are they like like
• 19:04
  successful Jewish? Yeah? Yeah, they're like computer Jews you know damn yeah.
• 19:10
  So they're like they're out there like you know, Silicon Valley, Yeah,
• 19:12
  yeah, that's where they Yeah, dude, I'm like this this whole
• 19:17
  thing, it must be like the social experiment. Do they think it's just
• 19:22
  like a fad? What's a fad? Like like it's something you're gonna get.
• 19:27
  I'm like seven, Oh dude, you know what, I don't even
• 19:32
  caring more bro like, like I I guess I don't even ask them that
• 19:34
  question because like I mean, there, you know what I think it is.
• 19:38
  I think it's not about it being a fad. I think it's more
• 19:40
  about trust and I think they trust me. And uh like despite the crazy
• 19:45
  shit that goes down, like I got yeah, like you, parking in
• 19:47
  downtown is very balsy bro. Like, if I was a homeless like or
• 19:49
  like something like that, like the first thing, and if I would be
• 19:52
  like I'm getting out of downtown get enough change to get into like a train
• 19:56
  and then going on like a nicer neighborhood like Sierrah Madre or like Pasadena,
• 20:00
  and just like being in the cut dude. Yeah, I mean I just
• 20:03
  wanted to be in your hears and I could just wake up and go there.
• 20:07
  How do you how do you handle taking a ship and taking a piss?
• 20:08
  I mean, and I got a toilet, bro? What yeah?
• 20:12
  And there? Yeah, I didn't know they have all that, dude,
• 20:15
  all this van, all these vans, they have a toilet, like they're
• 20:18
  made for like like outdoor shit, bro. So like you know you gotta
• 20:22
  take outdoor shit. It's not like an RV. Then what does it smell
• 20:26
  an RV? You just gotta dump it out like when you go, oh
• 20:29
  yeah you got you gotta go to like dumb stations. But like like I
• 20:32
  couldn't serve, you know, like to make sure I don't like waste too
• 20:36
  much. Ill like peeing water bottles and then I'll like scatter them around in
• 20:38
  La. So there's just like bottles on my path. There's just all around
• 20:45
  Hollywood. You know why just not pissing the street. Well, I'd rather
• 20:48
  I'd rather be more of like a scavenger hunt for the homeless, you know
• 20:52
  what I mean, Like like because you know they're opening those bottles, you
• 20:56
  know what I mean, They're like taking a sip, trying it out,
• 20:57
  like maybe it's like maybe it ain't that clear that they think it's water,
• 21:00
  maybe apple cider. You know they don't know, Bro, you know it's
• 21:03
  hoss. Bro. I've seen a homeless guy. I would throw my piss
• 21:08
  bottle in the trash. I've seen a homeless guy pick it up and like
• 21:11
  sip it out and then like just toss it on the floor angrily. And
• 21:15
  I was like, damn, I felt bad. I just went there.
• 21:18
  I was like, hey, do you want a water? Bro? Like
• 21:22
  another piss bottle? Now you're bad? Huh, Well, I mean do
• 21:26
  you have a fun do you like how often do you have to dump out?
• 21:30
  It's like every month, every month, twelve gallon tank under my foot,
• 21:36
  so it all goes down there. How's the bony situation? You got
• 21:40
  a bone? Bitches in that? I mean, I know you've boned in
• 21:41
  the last just a crazy thing. I really want to fucking there. I
• 21:47
  have not fucking them. I've had I've had women in there, but I've
• 21:51
  never I've never actually like never actually had sex, which kind of like is
• 21:55
  my fault? Which is my fault? I mean, they're already there.
• 21:59
  I'm pretty sure that you're Yeah. Yeah, like that're not capitalizing, bro,
• 22:04
  That's the fucking thing. Seventy five percent of the mission was done.
• 22:07
  Yeah, you you're just fucking didn't you got You got him in the scope.
• 22:11
  You just had it. No, not only in the scope. They
• 22:14
  walked up to the scope. You know what I mean, they walked into
• 22:17
  the scope. They put the barrel on their mouth. Very rare that a
• 22:19
  bird flies into the cage, right, Yeah, that's exactly what happened,
• 22:23
  dude. And it was just like, yo, bro, just hit shoot.
• 22:26
  It's all I had to do because because because you, because I'm being
• 22:27
  honest with you, any of the chicks I'm dating, if you the second
• 22:30
  you tell me you live in a van, they're like, they'll be like,
• 22:33
  fuck this full. That's why if they keep talking, you gotta understand
• 22:37
  they're in they're with the game. The second you tell him I'm in a
• 22:40
  van, and they keep talking to you and they want that second drink,
• 22:44
  they're they're ready. Yeah, that's why sales pitch Bro sales pitch. I'm
• 22:51
  like, bro, I'm like, yo, dude, I'm Jewish. I
• 22:52
  live in a van. Burla's goal. And here's the thing though, it's
• 22:56
  always the same experience with women. And then when I tell guys they say
• 22:59
  this anything like the way you just responded, it was the same. It
• 23:02
  was like, like, dude, you already did the job. Like they're
• 23:03
  in the van. That's it. It's like, dude, you want to
• 23:07
  fuck the kid, you want to give them candy? The kids inside,
• 23:10
  all right, what I mean, like you got him, bro, Now
• 23:12
  you just do the deed. Yeah. But the thing is I didn't do
• 23:15
  it, so like for like the bro fuck dude. That's as strong as
• 23:18
  fuck dude. So the girl, like like nine out of ten girls that
• 23:22
  i'd like see, they would they would want to go back to the van
• 23:23
  and they want to check it out and I'll see how you live in right,
• 23:26
  And then they come inside the van and they sit on the couch.
• 23:29
  I turn on the LEDs you know what I mean, put on the romance,
• 23:33
  you put on that ran some music, you know what I mean.
• 23:37
  And then they come inside and we sit there and this is the problem though,
• 23:41
  I'll get like nervous, you know what I mean, because like I'm
• 23:44
  using conscious you think you think that's a conscious place because you're but not about
• 23:48
  the van. It's just more it's just more like my own like thing that
• 23:51
  I have to like fucking you know, like do you like I don't know.
• 23:53
  I think I'm bluetooth. It's not even bro. I probably at least
• 23:57
  go to the sunset because i'd get the band like, yeah, you can
• 24:00
  pull up anywhere you can fuck bone Yeah, yeah, dude, that's that
• 24:03
  you got an advantage there. Can we talk about caring like romantic places and
• 24:07
  bone like places that you can't like if I take my girl like a sunset,
• 24:10
  like it's it's gonna be uncofortable to that you can't fuck outside, but
• 24:12
  you got a van, dude, dude, all right, you're right,
• 24:15
  bro, I gotta start sucking find lookouts. You gotta find lookouts. But
• 24:19
  the thing a little bit, you won't be the nicest lookout sit outside.
• 24:22
  The man. I guess my isshoe is like here's the thing with me,
• 24:26
  and like i I'm very like very specific, which is not kid like,
• 24:30
  I'm very like this is what I want, you know what I mean,
• 24:32
  And like like in a girl, so like if she's not like hitting that
• 24:36
  all, like so quickly leave, which isn't like what a cup work?
• 24:38
  What are your couple like she has? You know what I mean? I
• 24:41
  realized recently, hung I'm like, you should trying hooker. They do exactly
• 24:45
  what you like to get a hooker. Oh fuck no, I don't even
• 24:52
  like that, Like this is like a person, you know what I mean.
• 24:55
  But you know how dope that'd be for the for the for the hooker.
• 25:00
  This chicken fucked in his band because usually get fucked like in the backseat
• 25:04
  any hookers out there the van, the homie in the van, they're like,
• 25:11
  can I stay for a night? Like what's up? This is a
• 25:14
  so what are your couple of things that that you need from a female?
• 25:17
  They were talking about. I realized that I like a really like I like
• 25:21
  a really feminine girl, like a one that that's why we were like latinas
• 25:23
  bro, because they like really get ready, you know what I mean.
• 25:26
  Like they're like like they get the nice they got like the they got their
• 25:30
  cleavage out. You know, we like we love that. Yeah yeah yeah
• 25:34
  yeah we can see yeah yeah, you know they get they get ready.
• 25:38
  Brother, get their their makeup on for you, and like like they're just
• 25:41
  always like ready to fuck is what they look like. You know, they're
• 25:45
  always just like on it. There you go. Yeah, that's that's a
• 25:49
  lot. That's like the quick version of the fucking yeah. I know.
• 25:56
  Sometimes like you see white chick's dress, right, and then I'm just like,
• 25:59
  bitch, white you worrying old guy clothes. But it's like you know
• 26:02
  what I mean. I was like like I'm just like I'm just like this,
• 26:04
  like like what's going on? Like no, you know nothing, You're
• 26:07
  like what's going on in there? But you're just like, yo, man,
• 26:10
  is he just like spitting in God's face? Huh? Just like he
• 26:11
  gave you a nice body. And it's just like fuck this. I want
• 26:15
  to wear this old nineteen eighty guest shirt with some fucking high rise, fucking
• 26:19
  old levies and are rimp like, get the funk out of here. Bits
• 26:22
  That shit is sexy. You know what I can't stand And you know I
• 26:26
  love white girls. I can't stand an old pair of fucking ugs. I
• 26:30
  don't think anybody's wearing ugs and they yeah, who's wearing hugs? And they
• 26:32
  are? Bro, who are you fucking Bro, she's gotta be twelve or
• 26:34
  some white still up twelve year old girls were honest. And I go to
• 26:41
  the mall quite often, bro like, and I go to the nice mall
• 26:42
  where I was like yo, like, and and the mall that I go
• 26:47
  to just like you know, it's like farest. I go to Sierra Madre
• 26:48
  and I was like yo, bro, like, the youth still goes to
• 26:52
  this mall. I have not seen a pair of us, not even for
• 26:53
  sale, Bros. And a long last time Crocs are in because no,
• 26:57
  this is what happened. They transition from ugs to the birken Stocks. Bro.
• 27:02
  That's like the new ugs. Yeah, burken Stocks. You don't have
• 27:04
  burgen Stocks. I already have already went through like three pairs. Bro.
• 27:07
  I got some fake ass Burgenstocks. I got a Morocco for like a dollar,
• 27:11
  Bro. Damn it just like brough Bro. These yeas these Bro.
• 27:15
  I got these in Vietnam. Bro twenty bucks. Oh my god, dude,
• 27:22
  I got the I got all the drip. Bro. Everything I wear
• 27:26
  is just like made by like a slave. Have you do you travel a
• 27:33
  lot? Though? Yeah? Yeah yeah yeah, so you got in,
• 27:36
  but you were talking in the back because he said, he like goes that
• 27:38
  for real? You what you went to Morocco and you went to like Vietnam.
• 27:41
  Yeah. Yeah, I'm gonna be in Guatemala. I'm trying to hit
• 27:44
  up all these like like this like Winner, I'm trying to hit up all
• 27:47
  these like poor countries so I can like steal their clothes. You know what
• 27:48
  I mean, I need another like shirt. I mean, you have the
• 27:53
  physician that fits a lot of the clothes they make there, so I feel
• 27:56
  like you can find a lot of clothes. Yeah, Like when you're fat,
• 27:59
  it's hard to find comfortably. Really. Yeah, you got dripped though,
• 28:03
  bro. I mean you know, I got my plugs. Not trying
• 28:04
  to call you fat. Yeah. No, It's like it's like I know,
• 28:11
  Ben, It's like I've been bigger, so it's like I know,
• 28:15
  but when my biggest I'm like fuck that. I was like that ship was
• 28:18
  so fucking like depressing, but like you can't find pants your size and you're
• 28:22
  just like you have every size here and then you're like then when you realize,
• 28:26
  you're like, oh, you're the problem. Like he's like yeah,
• 28:27
  you're like you need to do that ship. Look, I just want to
• 28:30
  address this just to make things clear. The only reason I said you're fat,
• 28:36
  Oh he says it all the time. It's because you're speaking from experience.
• 28:38
  Yeahs so you are fat. Yeah, I don't consider the fact he
• 28:44
  calls himself fat. So if he calls himself fat, I'm a call him
• 28:45
  fat. I think I think it's if you ask me. I think he
• 28:48
  just looks like a guy that you should have played football in high school or
• 28:52
  that did. Dude, you know what, you'd be a good lineback.
• 28:53
  Yeah, see's what I'm saying, because he's not like super roll beast,
• 28:56
  you know, like that's a fat like dude. He looks like he'll beat
• 28:59
  me up because I'll be both of us. Yeah, I ain't gonna lie.
• 29:03
  Yesterday, bro, like I felt like I went to the Homies mom's
• 29:06
  funeral just for the fact that because like all right, so r P to
• 29:07
  the Homies mom and then what is it? So like you know this like
• 29:11
  I won't know where this is going? So so like oh, like what
• 29:18
  is it? I didn't I never met the Homies mom, bro, but
• 29:21
  like this who has like some you know, this drama and the family where
• 29:23
  like his brother kind of was making it a very issue to kind of like
• 29:26
  make sure the homie didn't get a chance to sack good bye to his mom
• 29:29
  right and then he was like he was like, hey man, he's like
• 29:30
  he roll with me because I'm like, you know, if my homie gets
• 29:33
  in trouble and his brother decides to call the cops, they're gonna look at
• 29:37
  the homies record and then at his brother's record, they're gonna take my home
• 29:38
  in the job because he's already he's he's with the business. Yeah, you
• 29:42
  know, not anymore, but he was with the business before. So like
• 29:47
  I walked get his brother dogs him and then I walked like you know,
• 29:51
  like like like he walked up and he was like hey, whoop, Like
• 29:53
  I'm just here to say what's up. And you know I'm gonna bounce after
• 29:56
  this, and you can tell you wanted to say something, but he didn't
• 29:59
  see that was walk around behind him and I looked at his brother. I
• 30:00
  was like, bro, well fucking I will fucking beat the shit out of
• 30:03
  you right here, bro, like like I don't know, nobody else didn't
• 30:07
  know you were dogging. No, he didn't know. I was right there
• 30:10
  rolling with him because you know, I don't look like none of the people
• 30:12
  in his family, and he's like the little brothers. So I'm pretty sure
• 30:15
  like the two older brothers. You know, when you're the little when you're
• 30:18
  the smallest one, bro, like they give it to you. Like was
• 30:21
  George the smallest one? And you know how you know how George says his
• 30:25
  brothers will fuck him up and and do all kinds of shit like yeah,
• 30:29
  it was yeah, bro. So I'm like, you have to have that
• 30:32
  attitude where you're like you want to kind of like like I'll do that shit.
• 30:34
  So I was just like I just looked at this food. I was
• 30:37
  just like foo. I was like, I don't even start, bro.
• 30:38
  I was like, I'm going through my own shit. I just came here
• 30:41
  just because I probably love your brother more than you, dude. But even
• 30:44
  then he's on. Let's say he did say something. I wasn't gonna last
• 30:47
  thing you want to fight at a funeral, dog, I would know what's
• 30:49
  going on a world stop. I wasn't. I wasn't gonna fight or anything
• 30:52
  like that. Like if honestly, if he's strongly on my friend, I
• 30:53
  wasn't tell his wife like, hey, d Caesar out of here. I
• 30:56
  was like no, like, OK, yeah, like you know what I
• 30:59
  mean, Because I was like, I'm not I'm not trying to have the
• 31:00
  homie like he has as he's a definition of a person that's redemption, has
• 31:03
  experienced redemption, bro, Like you had a very fucked up life and then
• 31:07
  like you got your ship together, you got a beautiful family, your kids
• 31:11
  have kids. It's grown to be a really good friend of mine. So
• 31:14
  I'm just like, I'm not. I don't want my friend to mess something
• 31:15
  like that up over somebody, especially. I'm like, brother, this is
• 31:18
  your mother, bro, Even if my sister was a hooker and my brother
• 31:22
  was a mass murder and all this, if our mother died, it's not
• 31:25
  in my right to fucking tell you, hey, man, like you can't
• 31:29
  see it because you suck too many dicks, you know what I mean.
• 31:30
  They're like, you know what I mean or whatever it is. I don't
• 31:33
  give a fuck, bro, Like, hey, it's your right, you
• 31:33
  know, you come, come, sit, come fucking say whatever the fuck
• 31:37
  you gotta say to mom's you know. Yeah, But it was one of
• 31:40
  those situations, dog where I was just like, man, I was like
• 31:41
  sometimes I think, God, mysel this guy's way, bro, this guy.
• 31:45
  Yeah, I'm telling you you're you're a protecting guy. Bro. That's
• 31:48
  what's dude. I tried man like because he knows. I'm like, I
• 31:52
  don't know, Man, I'm one of those people. I'm I'm very empathetic
• 31:55
  bro Like, I'm very like dude, like, don't let don't let me
• 31:57
  see an injured animal, Like You'll be like, girl, this wooll fucking
• 32:00
  stopped the freeway for a cat. Yeah, Bro, dude, if I
• 32:05
  see an injured animal, Bro, I'm like, dude, I'm taking the
• 32:07
  pictures. Dude, I'm taking it home. Bro, like, we're gonna
• 32:10
  this is my new skunk. You know what I mean? Dude, I
• 32:14
  saw three skunks throwing it down the other day. Bro, like fighting and
• 32:16
  must you must see shit because you're always like on the Yeah, you're always.
• 32:22
  I don't know about dude. Where do you live? Where would you
• 32:23
  say you stay? I'm just mostly I'm I'm I always. I'm always have
• 32:30
  some more like to be usually the next day, so I usually just park
• 32:34
  wherever I know I need to be the next day. That's why I part
• 32:37
  here. That makes sense because I was like, all right, I'm not
• 32:38
  gonna be here in the morning. So I'm just gonna park up here,
• 32:42
  and then after this I have like another meeting like in like in Hollywood areas.
• 32:45
  I'm gonna drive there and just follower like the road takes me. But
• 32:51
  nah, dude, I'm just like I'm all over, dude, just wherever.
• 32:53
  I know, like shit, And he said, like, be done,
• 32:57
  I'm there. You know early even I was late. You know,
• 33:00
  I got distracted by all these school buses. I was like, oh shit,
• 33:04
  I want I want one of those. Probably pulled into that parking lot
• 33:07
  right now. I was just driving around. Bro. I was just like,
• 33:08
  I was kind of bro. Last night was horrible. Bro, Like
• 33:13
  just trying to find parking and then like some homeless guy starts like falling my
• 33:15
  van. I'm like, bro, fuck walking like falling, yeah, dude.
• 33:20
  And then every time I parky would like stop and I'm like, dude,
• 33:22
  I gotta get like a new parking lot. And then the other thing
• 33:24
  you gotta think of is like the levels of the road, because some roads
• 33:28
  are like like they have like this circular arch, so you can't park on
• 33:31
  like the side because they'll the car will be slanted. You can't sleep like
• 33:35
  that, so you gotta can't with them. I mean that's bro, you
• 33:37
  can't. I'm never dude, something about like this. When you sleep,
• 33:40
  you like to sleep flat, right, So when the road's like this and
• 33:45
  you and you park, then it's fucking curved, so you're sleeping like diagonally.
• 33:49
  It's not comfortable. So like, like the only other alternative is finding
• 33:52
  a straight road or parking at a parking lot. But the problem is I've
• 33:55
  been mugged at parking lots like too much. I think go inside your van.
• 34:00
  I mean, like a few weeks ago, this guy actually managed like
• 34:02
  bust my window open and like try to like like break in. You got
• 34:07
  a strap, right, Nah, that was a problem. I didn't have
• 34:09
  a weapon. Bro, you gotta get Oh you got a man do kit
• 34:13
  one? Yeah, that's one of the first things. I usually try to
• 34:15
  get out of it with words, you know what I mean, I don't
• 34:17
  not in home, mean not in downtown. I'll tell you that much.
• 34:22
  Yeah, I know, I canna tell I looked at these homeless on this
• 34:23
  is a new rank, bro, Huntington Beach. You can get away with
• 34:27
  some words. And Hollywood even bro, yea Hollywood's like rancid. That's where
• 34:31
  I'm at. Broh, dude, you get at some point you probably must
• 34:35
  be in like a nice part, but at some point you gotta get out
• 34:37
  of there too. Bro, you gotta get like you gotta Yeah, bro,
• 34:39
  just hit me. I'll be like, yo, at least to pull
• 34:44
  up because you can't worry about the cops pulling up or he's at. But
• 34:46
  if they pull up to you and be like, look, man, I'm
• 34:49
  going to school out here. Yeah, you don't look like yeah, that's
• 34:52
  what I'm saying. You don't look like the kind of homeless they would hate
• 34:53
  on because it's like where he's at, where he's where he's at, like
• 34:58
  like it's like it's a lot of a old money, like a lot of
• 35:01
  old old Armenian people, and like they don't like they don't like that fucking
• 35:06
  like messy ass kind of homeless. Like if you're one of the motherfuckers that
• 35:08
  you're just like, hey, bro, this guy he goes to his school
• 35:12
  here, it's like they're gonna be like leaving alone, you know, like
• 35:15
  it's it's dude, I do cops. Do cops fuck with him? Well,
• 35:19
  here's the thing I don't like every time, Like some shit happens.
• 35:22
  I usually like don't care to call the cops. Like it's not like,
• 35:25
  oh, you snitching or no snitch. I'm just like yeah, what like
• 35:29
  no, no, no, But do cops fuck with you? Like have
• 35:30
  you ever been pulled over? I mean everything, Bro, I'm like a
• 35:34
  words guy, like not like a weapons. So even when cops pull up
• 35:37
  on me, like like I had. There was one time where this cop
• 35:42
  like was pissed because I parked on like the side of the road, like
• 35:45
  facing the other direction, and I just I just like we just talked for
• 35:47
  a bit. I invited to my shows. He leaves, Bro, It's
• 35:51
  all good, you know what I mean? Then you should risk You should
• 35:53
  risk parking in residential areas. No I do. That's the thing. Yeah,
• 35:58
  I used to park only in pargain lots. But like the amount of
• 36:00
  times homeless people would like bang on my window and shit, like it happened
• 36:05
  so often that like three weeks ago, this guy was so unsuspecting. He
• 36:07
  was like a fucking cholo dude, like he'll like kill me, bro,
• 36:10
  and and he just starts. I wake up at like four in the morning.
• 36:14
  This guy's like punching my window trying to bust through and I just see
• 36:16
  him. I look through the window and I just go back to sleep,
• 36:20
  bro, because I'm so used to it. I'm like, he's gonna leave.
• 36:22
  But this guy was persistent. Bro. He went around, he went
• 36:25
  to the side of the window that I was on and just fucking punched through
• 36:29
  it. Bro. And I was like, ah, like, now I
• 36:31
  gotta deal with this guy. And the first thing I said was so dumb.
• 36:35
  Looking back, Now, I look at this guy. Dude, we're
• 36:37
  making an eye Tell hey, let me in the fucking van. And I'm
• 36:39
  like, dude, honestly, I'm like, hello, tired right night,
• 36:44
  you can come back later. And and I was like, I'm like that's
• 36:46
  gonna work. Bro, He's gonna he's gonna empathize to my to my fatigue,
• 36:51
  you know what I mean. And nah, Bro, dude, he
• 36:52
  just he's like, no, give me, let me get the fan all
• 36:55
  cute. Like I was, all right, then, what the fuck do
• 36:58
  you do? Then? Oh? I got I'm I'm a smart guy,
• 37:00
  Bron, That's what I would. I can't. I have my whole setup.
• 37:06
  So like, I like, you gotta h because you gotta pack everything
• 37:08
  up. Yeah. So I was like I just started like like playing like
• 37:13
  mind games with him and it worked. I was just I just like I
• 37:15
  was like, hey, this is how it ended. So it was like
• 37:17
  a good four minute conversation. Like we were there for a while, bro,
• 37:22
  and we're like talking. I'm trying to calm him down. He's like
• 37:24
  persistently trying to like break in and like threatened to kill me and shit,
• 37:29
  and I just go all right, man, like here's the thing, Like,
• 37:30
  can you you just like calm down a little, because my my baby
• 37:35
  daughter is sleeping here in the corner and if you keep screaming, you're gonna
• 37:37
  wake her up. And he's like and he goes show me your fucking daughter,
• 37:42
  I'll kill you both, And I was like all right, I'm like
• 37:45
  all right, dude, Like look like but here's a promise. Like she's
• 37:47
  like in this angle and you can't see her from that angle that you're in.
• 37:52
  So if you go around the van to like the sat passenger door,
• 37:54
  all open the door and then you can peek your head and then you'll see
• 37:58
  her, but you promise you'll leave. And he's like, all right,
• 38:00
  but if I go there and she's not sucking there, i'most stab you to
• 38:04
  death in your van. I was like, all right, So he goes
• 38:06
  around and as soon as he goes around, I like quickly disassembled like the
• 38:09
  ship that was up and I just fucking cranked the engine. Dude, he
• 38:14
  hears it. He like pulls out some like thing. I think it was
• 38:15
  like a rock because he was starting me with rocks earlier and tries to like
• 38:19
  bang open the window with the rock and I and I as soon as the
• 38:22
  car cranks took like eight seconds, Bro. I was like, Bro,
• 38:25
  now you want to take forever? Bro. And I put it in reverse
• 38:29
  and I fucking zoomed backwards. He like jumps on the ladder on the back
• 38:32
  of my van. I swerve, he swerve. He jumps off, Bro.
• 38:37
  And then and then as I'm driving off, the Bluetooth connects to my
• 38:42
  van and then just fucking dude, just yesterday by the Beatles just started playing
• 38:47
  BRU, and I was like, Osh, it wasn't even yesterday, brou.
• 38:51
  I said, let it beyond my last pot on my last one because
• 38:53
  it made sense, But it was actually in my life by the Beatles,
• 38:58
  which like people don't know, but like if you hear the beat Bro,
• 39:00
  like, dude, throw that on. Bro, you can't. Oh fuck,
• 39:04
  all right, Hey go it on? Bro? Oh that's me.
• 39:07
  What the fuck? No, So there's a it starts off and it just
• 39:10
  it just feels like the right song. They get mugged too. I mean
• 39:14
  like if you play that shit, it's like, dude, dude, d
• 39:16
  d dud dude. I'm just driving off and it's like there are places all
• 39:22
  right, that's fucking hell of it. Why would you have that? Pretty
• 39:27
  well, I just want to have an apartment. Nah, Bro, the
• 39:30
  fuck that sucks. It's so boring. Bro, it is boring. I
• 39:35
  think about it not boring because I love it, but I can see how
• 39:37
  if you're a person that wants it depends on somebody's situation. I mean,
• 39:39
  like for him, like a dude that's he sounds like he's having a blast.
• 39:43
  Like literally the way you're talking about it, you're like, dude,
• 39:45
  You're like, I can see him if I put him an apartment, He's
• 39:46
  like, Bro, I gotta leave, Like this place. Did you get
• 39:50
  from the outdoors? Yeah, baby, yeah, even outdoor cat motherfucker yeah
• 39:54
  yeah yeah. Bro. You can't hold this for on for too long.
• 39:58
  Maybe during the winter when it's taking but you get Yeah, you were like
• 40:00
  two hour podcast. I was like two hour podcast, bro, I gotta
• 40:05
  move around, Doug with the fuck? Is there a one mile intermission?
• 40:08
  Can we like do a quick mile? That's fucking wow, man, I
• 40:13
  mean, I mean, you're a water by the way, I'm getting caught
• 40:15
  mouth, bro. Like God, people's not even smoking, but you're you're
• 40:21
  it's going up my nose into my throat. Bro. I'm like, shit,
• 40:23
  it's like a good ten years ten years younger than us. Oh yeah,
• 40:28
  yeah, he's like you see twenty four, right, twenty three yea
• 40:30
  seven seven, and yeah he's ten years younger than because they're in your thirties,
• 40:34
  yeah and all old. Bro. I don't know, bro, your
• 40:39
  generation is gonna get sicker than us. Yeah. I was like it's a
• 40:44
  lost cause. Bro. So it's like we started eating plastic like at like
• 40:47
  ten years old, So you know what I mean. Yeah, like not
• 40:50
  even that, bro, Just like the Internet's fucking him, bro, Like
• 40:54
  we were like that's the crazy thing about it, like like our generation was
• 40:58
  the first one exposed to you, Like you don't really know the actual backlash
• 41:01
  to being exposed to the Internet. That's why I feel like a lot of
• 41:05
  the not for nothing. But I feel like a lot of the motherfuckers that
• 41:07
  are out there committing the craziest acts like a motherfuckers show classroom and goes berserk
• 41:14
  has a lot to do with the amount of time you spend on the Internet.
• 41:16
  Yeah, a lot of these motherfuckers were deep into the Internet, like
• 41:21
  heavy, and I'm just like, yo, man, computers kind of fucked
• 41:23
  it up, man, because I don't think. I don't think motherfuckers we're
• 41:25
  thinking about doing shit like that. Before you know, you had so much
• 41:30
  liberty access to all this crazy shit like you ever been on the dark Web?
• 41:34
  Nah, Bro? I mean actually I did. That's where I got
• 41:36
  my my ID allegedly, allegedly, alleged, allegedly allegedly not straight up,
• 41:42
  bro, come find me all the fucking all the cops I've lied to.
• 41:49
  And do you know rass Dude? Huh? You know whos dude is?
• 41:52
  Rass Dude? Who's ras due? You don't I feel like you would know
• 41:55
  a guy? You would? You're like, I feel like you would know
• 41:59
  a guy named rad Dude. You live on the streets, bro. It's
• 42:02
  another it's another he didn't like he didn't live on the streets, but like
• 42:07
  he might as well, he might as well want it because I'm like,
• 42:09
  bro, like you're never in your apartment? What are you doing? And
• 42:12
  like he was just like posting up, but like this alley looks nice.
• 42:15
  I'm just gonna kick it here for a while, sleeping in sernast that's the
• 42:19
  almost a Jobby's apartment. Yeah, dude, I'm not no reason that.
• 42:22
  Dude. I think that's the whole part of being a Jew. Bro.
• 42:24
  I feel like real Jews aren't real Jews, because like I'm always trying to
• 42:28
  find the best deal. You know. That's why I live in a van.
• 42:30
  Dude. It's a two for one special. Bro. It's a house
• 42:34
  and a car. Bro, That is a deal. Dude. If you're
• 42:36
  Jewish and you don't live in a van, you're not a real Jew,
• 42:37
  bro. Because like I'm like when I was in Sacramento, I was trying
• 42:40
  to find like, all right, where's the nicest day but the cheapest one?
• 42:45
  You know what I mean? Like where's the How can I get more
• 42:46
  food for less? You know what I mean? Like how and I did?
• 42:50
  Bro, there's a bunch of free food out here too. Man.
• 42:52
  Let me tell you the fucking secret. All right, this is dude,
• 42:57
  do this and you will have free food for life. All right, run
• 43:00
  it? What is it? Kill Palestinians? What? Yeah? Eat them?
• 43:06
  Nah? Nah? What's it called? So this is what you do,
• 43:09
  bro, so and I fucked up. So you're going to three star
• 43:14
  hotels, three four star hotels and I'll tell you why not five? And
• 43:17
  then you go and you and then you you just walk in, go to
• 43:21
  the buffet, you eat, and you dip and they usually have good shit
• 43:24
  you have like bacon, and looking at the breakfast, you're looking for the
• 43:28
  continent. I don't ask for you know what, bro Like, I've thought
• 43:30
  like I've done that a few times in Vegas, like where I was just
• 43:32
  like, I'll just I'll see the I'll see the fucking hotel. And I'm
• 43:36
  just like, fudd, we didn't wake up for our ship. This is
• 43:38
  going to this one dude. Yeah, but dude, just do it for
• 43:43
  life, free food for life. Dude. I might, I might,
• 43:46
  I might blog this, I might vlog your hack. I might just rap
• 43:50
  pick a random ass holiday in I have so bro Okay, but let me
• 43:52
  tell you what not to do because I did this in secondmento, I got
• 43:54
  fucked. Do you get in trouble? Not really yes, oh shit,
• 44:00
  but like but like worst trouble in you thing like this is my I was
• 44:02
  gonna say, like, what did they kick your out? Nah? Bro?
• 44:05
  Running it running? What happened were washing dishes? I'm gonna pay for
• 44:10
  all this shit I stole, Bro, Like I coudn't even go to my
• 44:13
  show. I was too busy fucking doing clock work, all right, do
• 44:15
  So I was dude, oh my god, So like I said, go
• 44:20
  to three star hotels, my dumbass bro, I land there, uber me.
• 44:25
  I get a uber to a five star hotel, the Hyatt Regency by
• 44:30
  the fucking capital of Sacramento. And I go in, bro and they have
• 44:35
  a giant buffet and I mean massive, like they had like a ton of
• 44:39
  food. I was like, okay, sick, Bro, I grab a
• 44:43
  play Bro. I fucking throw everything on there. Bro. I'm sitting down.
• 44:45
  I just landed from my fly. I'm eating this giant breakfast. This
• 44:50
  woman keeps coming to me like this like cat like the waitress, and she's
• 44:52
  like, can I get you a coffee? Can I get you? Are
• 44:54
  all inclusive? Just fucking yeah, give me one coffee. Bro, it's
• 44:58
  free, fucking dude, Like the fourth or fifth times, like the time
• 45:01
  that she came up to me. She comes to me with a check and
• 45:04
  she's like, whenever you're ready. I'm like, hold up, whenever I'm
• 45:10
  ready. What isn't this a hotel to go to sleep in my room?
• 45:15
  I was like, I was like, put on room twenty five minutes?
• 45:16
  What the fuck? Like? So I opened the check, dude, this
• 45:21
  buffet was forty dollars. Bro. So I see that ship and I'm like,
• 45:27
  oh, hell no, and I'm I gotta pay now. I'm not
• 45:30
  gonna like leave, you know what I mean. So you got kint,
• 45:35
  you got kind of fucked up ship. But I'm still gonna And you know
• 45:37
  what, I think they caught me because I posted on my story when I
• 45:42
  got there, like hey, shout out the Hyatt Regency for all this free
• 45:45
  food, and then I tagged them bruh. I feel like they're like social
• 45:49
  media guy, just like saw there was like, hey, we have a
• 45:52
  mole inside of the buffet right now eating food. Find him like he's a
• 45:57
  jew with a big nose. Go forty what is it forty bucks? Though?
• 46:01
  Like when it's supposed to be free though, That's what I'm saying,
• 46:06
  like it's supposed to be free. No, but I'm sure no no no
• 46:08
  no no no no no no no. You guys are right, but I'm
• 46:10
  sure you can pay to eat there when it's not free. I've been to
• 46:14
  restaurants where they have an open bar, open restaurant. It's a restaurant with
• 46:17
  the hotel with the restaurant. So this is this is how, this is
• 46:21
  what I did. So I go like this, and this is where I
• 46:25
  still got a finesse, you know what I mean. I can't just let
• 46:28
  myself get played like that. So I was like, all right, I'm
• 46:32
  gonna get more food then, you know. So I go up. I
• 46:36
  get three plates of food and I stack them all bro like to the fucking
• 46:42
  top, like you can't even see the play anymore. I bring them all
• 46:45
  on my table. I go to the waitress and I'm like all right,
• 46:47
  I'm like, hey, they can get a box, and she's like,
• 46:52
  no, sorry, we we can't do that. This is a buffet.
• 46:55
  And I was like, so you're gonna tell me you're gonna waste all that
• 46:58
  food and she looks at it and she's like I'm sorry, we have to.
• 47:01
  And I was like, I was like, I'm like, don't you
• 47:04
  care about the environment, Like I'm trying to get her, and she's like
• 47:07
  like, I'm like there's a homeless outside. They can be eating that,
• 47:09
  you know me, you know what I mean? Like, I fucking I'm
• 47:16
  like all right, I'm like fine, and I go back and I'm like,
• 47:19
  no way, I'm not gonna bring this food. That's what I did.
• 47:22
  I fucking I started looking around and I'm paying let me. Let me
• 47:30
  tell you why. Let me tell you why, because you know, you
• 47:35
  know those cloth napkins they put the forks in this ship, we know.
• 47:39
  I fucking took all of them. Bro, I go all the tables around
• 47:43
  me. I took them one by one, put one on my lap,
• 47:45
  Drag all the food folded, put it in my luggage, all of it,
• 47:49
  bro, just fucking wrap it, put in the luggage, like,
• 47:52
  just keep going. My fucking luggage had more food than clothes. Bro.
• 47:57
  I had to take clothes out and put them on just I can make more
• 48:00
  room for the food. And then the woman comes and sees that there's no
• 48:05
  food left, which is ridiculous, right, And she just looks at the
• 48:10
  food and she's like like, but she doesn't want to judge me because like
• 48:14
  a five star. He's like, oh, well, I'm glad you made
• 48:17
  it work, like like I was like, and I just look at her
• 48:21
  like this, like ah, and then she goes like this, She's like,
• 48:23
  well, I feel bad for not like, you know, would you
• 48:25
  like a coffee like to go on the house. And I go, I
• 48:30
  guess you know, fucking left, bro, I got a coffee. I
• 48:32
  gave her twenty two percent TI, bro, I fucking leave. I had
• 48:37
  food for all like the whole stay of Sacramento. Bro, I didn't.
• 48:39
  I didn't buy anything anywhere else. You're still for forty bucks he's eight all
• 48:45
  day. Yeah, that's a pretty good that's de for me. Forty bucks
• 48:47
  all day, all day and the day after two. Bro. Yeah,
• 48:54
  I'm skinny too, Bro. I could I could laugh. That's that s
• 48:57
  could last me a week. Bro, I just shared it. I was
• 48:59
  like, right, I'm I'm gonna help some people out, you know?
• 49:02
  Is that? I mean, how long have you been living in the van?
• 49:07
  About a year? A year? And what what's gonna happen when the
• 49:09
  van breaks down? Oh, it already did, and like we're at I
• 49:15
  mean, like I just I just fix it. I'll just get it fixed.
• 49:19
  Ye, this is gonna take it a mechanic. Yeah, Like it's
• 49:22
  had issues in the past. It had like a really like it was like
• 49:24
  a twelve hundred dollars issue recently, which was like some issues. It was
• 49:30
  it was a problem with the intake manifold gasket and I had to get the
• 49:35
  whole thing replaced, so I had to get like a new therma set all
• 49:37
  that shit. And what do you what do you do when your stuff's getting
• 49:40
  repaired? Like do you just or do you stay o? God, stay
• 49:45
  inside? Like do you tell the person, Hey, this is where I
• 49:49
  live, dude, this is a hell of money. I'll be like,
• 49:52
  hey, can I sleep in the van like overnight in your life? And
• 49:54
  he's like no, I don't like fuck, so it's gonna make an agreement.
• 50:00
  He's like, if he like closes it down and then and then drives
• 50:02
  it out of a lot, I sleep in it, drive it back.
• 50:06
  But if it's like an issue with the engine where they can't close it down,
• 50:07
  then I'll probably just like at a hotel or like hit up a friend
• 50:10
  and kind of like spending out, I gotta deal with this ship and they'll
• 50:14
  be like yeah, I got you, brou and I'm like yeah baby.
• 50:16
  And sometimes I'll being people's apartments and be like, bro, like this it
• 50:20
  is worse than our situation. BRO, Like I'm I'm random people's apartments.
• 50:25
  No, these are like like friends, like okay, next or something,
• 50:28
  and I'll like sleep at their houses. I'm like, dude, Bro,
• 50:30
  this is a disaster. Bro. I'd be in there like trying to rearrange.
• 50:34
  Like, Bro, you need to organize this shit, like damn,
• 50:36
  Like I live in a van, broad much rather live in I'd rather bring
• 50:38
  women here in my van than into this place. I'll be sleeping. What
• 50:44
  is all this fucking cat for? Bro? Like you gotta so you've been
• 50:47
  at Craig's house. His mom's like guys bedtimes to remember no masturbating after seven
• 50:57
  okay, Like fuck Craig's mom. What are you doing? Bro? Let
• 51:00
  me just let me just I thought you're gonna see I thought we're gonna say
• 51:05
  frank because I was like, Craig has four cats, but like, yeah,
• 51:12
  no, Craig had me guy, google Craig Craig has Like Craig has
• 51:15
  four cats Frank has Steel's got like four cats too. He got four cats.
• 51:19
  I thought he too. Yeah, I don't keeping, but Craig,
• 51:22
  like, I remember you about Craig the one who hosts The Fourth Wall,
• 51:25
  Right, No, Craig Client, you know I'm too, the comedian stoner
• 51:30
  from Huntington Beach. Fuck, I probably do. But he just he just
• 51:32
  looks like a stoner. Now he doesn't mean he's not anti weed. Now
• 51:37
  he's like, I saw your comment. He's not. If you need to
• 51:39
  stop smoking weed because you're standing in the way of being productive, then do
• 51:45
  it. He still smokes these guys cats and then he's like he's like he's
• 51:52
  like, he's like I had stopped smoking weed for a year to get musht
• 51:54
  together. You should try it to some people do. He's on. Some
• 51:58
  people don't want to take our RHO or rs. Oh every fucking day dude
• 52:04
  called sho and number and number one. That's not because I'm trying to quit.
• 52:07
  That's because I'm trying to be high, I know. But some people
• 52:10
  just I agree. I'm not I smoked. I'm just saying, there's level
• 52:14
  all your problems. Ginger. This episode is sponsored by Ginger, the Alternative
• 52:21
  to weed. I don't know, unless you medicated. Maybe, yeah,
• 52:25
  dude, this is medication. It is medication. You ever tried any of
• 52:31
  those like those like those those real like uh, holistic approaches to it,
• 52:37
  like real problems, and then you're like, oh, this shit actually works,
• 52:39
  Like what that's not that's not holistic? Like I'll talk about like like
• 52:47
  for example, like you know how they say if you drink like a certain
• 52:51
  amount of juice or certain kind of juice, it is like good for your
• 52:52
  eyes or shit like that, or like I don't know, like certain like
• 52:55
  you know how they like it has certain proposes. Yeah, like yeah,
• 53:00
  like carrots at the vision thing, vision thing, that's a lie. During
• 53:05
  World wark in the war World War two, someone just said that because I
• 53:07
  don't know if it was carrots. Uh no, no, no, no,
• 53:10
  no, no no no. This is for this for during World War
• 53:14
  two, we had better technology than Germany or something, and they wanted to
• 53:19
  know why we were better. So we told him that we gave people carrots
• 53:22
  so they had better vision. And that's where that came from. If we
• 53:25
  bullshit, it was just we just had better technology and we just didn't want
• 53:30
  to They were really clever about it. They would have told him that we
• 53:32
  had something that they didn't have and they had to buy it off of us.
• 53:36
  Like oh, yeah, we've been eating ginger broa, but taking make
• 53:39
  ginger here. That did. Yeah, that shit worked for the Chinese,
• 53:43
  bro. Remember everybody wanted fucking magic ginger shots and all this shit magic ginger
• 53:46
  shots. Yeah, bro, Like, yo, have you ever been in
• 53:49
  like a Chinese market or a Japanese market? Bro, they got some shit
• 53:52
  out there that you're just like, what the fuck? Who? I always
• 53:55
  threw this ship in the trash, like, who the fuck is eating this?
• 53:59
  Yeah? Carrots are rich in the compound, better carol teen. But
• 54:05
  your body uses to make a form of vitamin A that helps your eyes adjust
• 54:08
  in the dark. What does your produce come? Look it up, that's
• 54:13
  what it does, Exavier, you want healthy loads, eat carrots. I'm
• 54:16
  just playing, damn. You know what does though? Heard a lot of
• 54:22
  porn stars et pistachio you get healthier loads? What you buy healthier bigger loads
• 54:29
  or like bigger loads and healthier loads. I guess that gets known for a
• 54:31
  lot of like male porn stars. Yeah, my sperm's working out. Yeah,
• 54:36
  bro, I heard hey on the on that topic, ginger is a
• 54:38
  natural viagra? Really yeah, I mean, obviously it's not working. Bro.
• 54:46
  I was like, obviously it's not working, but you got to eat
• 54:49
  a lot of ginger before you fucking when the girl comes in. I'm doing
• 54:52
  a podcast. Yeah, stop stop him from eating ginger. But we don't
• 54:55
  want him having a heart on him already, do Bro. I was like,
• 55:00
  you gotta have like when as soon as your girl over next time,
• 55:04
  you gotta just fucking get rag injured. Just take a bite, Just take
• 55:07
  a bite of rogupposed to be getting hard heart over LAFC dog what's exactly it's
• 55:15
  a LA football club. Yeah. And one of the homies posted something about
• 55:21
  him being hard about the game today and I was like, yo, it
• 55:24
  was dog Mons or something, but like I'm hard for the game. I'm
• 55:29
  like, bro, it's a lot of men playing soccer. Don't get too
• 55:30
  did you did you did you play sports growing up? Or are you like
• 55:35
  Jewish Jewish? Yeah? I did. I I played, I was,
• 55:38
  I was on the football team freshman year and I quit and I did wrestle.
• 55:42
  That's what I I did. Oh, so you can probably wrestle some
• 55:45
  homeless trying to break in Yeah. I mean I try to avoid like anything
• 55:50
  has to do with like physical conflict first, like I'll try to like keep
• 55:53
  it verbal to like first get them out and then if they're if they're persistent
• 55:58
  like that guy, then like I at that time, I did it.
• 56:02
  In the back of mind, I was stinging, like fuck, I wish
• 56:05
  I had a weapon right now, Like, dude, that's That's the one
• 56:07
  thing. If I was living in the bed exavier, it would be like
• 56:12
  three incidents before like the news comes out we now have a homeless what is
• 56:16
  it? A homeless serial killer on the loose, because it's gonna probably think
• 56:20
  it's like yo, this somebody just keeps dumping I think you're right. I
• 56:25
  think you're kind of right because you're putting yourself in positions where if you have
• 56:29
  a gun, you might need to use it and you might go to jail.
• 56:30
  Right, you had a gun, you shoot this guy, You're gonna
• 56:32
  go to Joel. I'm sorry. Not only homeless could get away with it,
• 56:36
  though, dog, Like, honestly, if you're a homeless, dog,
• 56:37
  I think I think there's homeless out there get away with murders, covers
• 56:40
  and whatever. Parking every homeless encabment fucking interview that I've seen. There's people
• 56:45
  that they're like people get killed every day and skid Row Bro, that's all
• 56:50
  I was saying. We're like five minutes from skid Row. Bro. I
• 56:52
  was like, dude, all Park, they're fucking like with my homies.
• 56:55
  No. I was like, dude, they're like killing each They were like
• 57:00
  nothing or like or they're all dying of fat and all like day by day
• 57:04
  and shit. Like it's just like like it's if you're a bum, dude,
• 57:07
  it's so easy for you to kill another bumb like straight up, like
• 57:10
  if you're out there in the streets like you if there's no investigation. I
• 57:15
  don't want to put money into that. They don't care. All you literally
• 57:17
  could do, Bro, It is like you can probably hit somebody in the
• 57:20
  head with a bowling ball or some shit, knock them out, and then
• 57:22
  stick a needle in them, bro, and leave him on the floor.
• 57:23
  They're gonna be like fett and all death. Pick them up, throw them,
• 57:25
  throw them in the furnest. You know who is getting away with murder
• 57:30
  people on Twitch? Yeah, you don't want It's about time we leave Twitch
• 57:34
  way over time. Yeah, bumbs die every day be yep, yeah,
• 57:38
  yeah, but I don't know dog being home. Homeless fools are tough though,
• 57:44
  Yeah, have you met a homeless? Have you kicked it with the
• 57:45
  homeless? Because you're not homeless, you just choose to like yeah, it's
• 57:47
  just like yeah, yeah, this is like no, because I mean if
• 57:52
  you were, like there's fools that have like homeless like RVs or and and
• 57:54
  mobile homeless, but like you could tell they're homeless because like shit's beat up,
• 57:59
  bro, Like you know, you're attack were like they have a twelve
• 58:01
  one in dollar problem that that van ain't moving from where you park it,
• 58:06
  you know what I mean? But like you you know, like I said,
• 58:07
  I was, like, your hair looks clean. You're like yeah you
• 58:13
  doing shows? Maybe? Yeah? How long have you been doing comedy professionally
• 58:19
  where it's like regular and doing shows? About two years now? Two years
• 58:23
  actually I think today. Bro. Yeah, congratulating molest and what is it
• 58:30
  prior to that? Like how were you doing it before? Were you just
• 58:34
  doing it in uh Sacramento or like how I never lived in Sacramento? Was
• 58:40
  my first time there? Did like the show there, But where were you
• 58:45
  living at before the van? Like in the Van always La, always La.
• 58:49
  And before I was I was living in in like the Bay Are like
• 58:52
  Sunnyville with like my my parents and ship. But like you were doing comedy
• 58:55
  or you were there. Yeah okay, but dude, like second when I
• 59:00
  was my first time, I was just there first show. I've never been
• 59:01
  there, But dude, I started in Israel and then I moved from Israel
• 59:07
  started doing an SF and it was and always my mindset was how can I
• 59:10
  do more mikes? How can I do more shows? And in Israel it
• 59:14
  was like one show a week, which was like not enough. And then
• 59:17
  in SF, like I barely it was just like there was only like two
• 59:21
  mics a night, which wasn't that Like it was not a comedy scene.
• 59:23
  They got cops. Yeah, they're comedy scenes. Okay, I get it's
• 59:27
  not good because the people, well it's not like La, Bro, It's
• 59:30
  not it's not it's it's just not as big as La, you know what
• 59:34
  I mean. There's there's so it's such a vibe here, bro, like
• 59:37
  too many people, too many, too many people, like funny ass people.
• 59:43
  And then you moved out here bad. I moved here about a year,
• 59:45
  like like last May, about a year and a few months ago.
• 59:50
  Is there anything that you don't like about it? Because like a boy living
• 59:52
  in avanon La. Yeah, sometimes you wake up and it's like way too
• 59:55
  high. You're like waking up and sweat you know what I mean? Is
• 59:59
  there going to be a point where like that something's gonna be a breaking point
• 1:00:01
  where you're just gonna be like, man, fuck this, I'm leaving the
• 1:00:05
  van life. I'm selling this shit. I'm getting an apartment. Like,
• 1:00:07
  I don't know, bro, I thought that once I make like enough money,
• 1:00:10
  it would be the breaking point, But I still don't want to leave,
• 1:00:14
  you know what. I'm just gonna get like an extra van. Yeah.
• 1:00:15
  Yeah, I love look in the time being like it is a vibe
• 1:00:22
  like I am like, I am trying to be more like out there and
• 1:00:24
  the like in the actual like because I've just been so focused on comedy that
• 1:00:30
  I'm not even like going out there like meeting women and stuff. So I
• 1:00:34
  think I'm gonna take a lot of time to you know, No, it's
• 1:00:37
  gonna slow you down keep going. Yeah, it's gonna slowly the fuck down,
• 1:00:40
  And you're gonna need an apartment because she's gonna be like, what we're
• 1:00:44
  always just gonna suck in the vans. You get a chick. Yeah,
• 1:00:45
  so unless you get a chick that's down with the band life, bro,
• 1:00:49
  A lot of them. Bro, I'm not gonna lie. That's the thing.
• 1:00:51
  I this is the problem with me. I don't. Yeah, I'm
• 1:00:54
  gonna we're gonna get matching vans. Dude, twitch shit, I don't want
• 1:01:00
  to like, bro. You know what I was. I was tripping about
• 1:01:02
  the whole being specific thing. There's one thing I really don't like, just
• 1:01:05
  like girls on like a yes man. I don't like a yes girl,
• 1:01:08
  you know what I mean? Like a girl who always just says like okay,
• 1:01:13
  like I want to I want and this is genuine as fuck. I
• 1:01:15
  want a girl who has like opinions and expresses them, you know what I
• 1:01:17
  mean? Like, wait, would you say? Nah? Bitch, shut
• 1:01:23
  up beside me. I'm making the decisions. Yeah, we're living in a
• 1:01:27
  band bit shut up. We're not getting no condo. We're not getting no
• 1:01:30
  fucking town home. She needs to accept and appreciate my van and respect it.
• 1:01:37
  Hell yeah, she making a sandwich in the man? Nah, I
• 1:01:43
  make the sandwiches all right, can take turns? Yeah? You know what,
• 1:01:47
  I don't even think they want what I make? Bro, Like they
• 1:01:51
  see what I'm making, Like, yo, is that ketchup and goldfish in
• 1:01:53
  a sandwich? You know you eat that shit like you enjoy you know,
• 1:01:58
  Like they don't even want to be involved. I'm gonna sit here in the
• 1:02:00
  corner once you make up your mind. Fuck me. But it finished,
• 1:02:04
  the finished, this goldfish sandwich. That's usually I feel like. I feel
• 1:02:08
  like in this day and age year, you can find the chick that's really
• 1:02:12
  more down with the van life, you know what I mean, Because it's
• 1:02:14
  more it's such a new time, like I guess to live in where it's
• 1:02:17
  just people are just like learning to live off the grid. People are learning
• 1:02:22
  to look at other alternatives, especially with housing being so expensive in California.
• 1:02:28
  Dude, Yeah, do you think like you're paying rent? Right? Yeah?
• 1:02:30
  How much as your rent? Damn? Bro, Damn it's it's expensive.
• 1:02:37
  Get a van, Bro, get a vans a month? BROA But
• 1:02:42
  then where do I watch TV? Where do I like masturbate? Yeah?
• 1:02:46
  Passenger seat Bro, passenger puts on the fucking you know the sunvisors, the
• 1:02:55
  sun visors. Yeah, you just put on the sunvisors. Nobody's season.
• 1:02:59
  Oh yeah, exactly. You got Wi Fi? No, that's what I
• 1:03:01
  do. Actually got Wi Fi? Nah, Bro's that's the only issues.
• 1:03:06
  You gotta go to like coffee shops a lot. So are you park in
• 1:03:07
  front of one? Because now I got a jerk off, I gotta jerk
• 1:03:10
  off in front of a front of start. I was just parking Starbucks like
• 1:03:14
  after hours to do some work. That's the thing, dude, that's what
• 1:03:19
  I want to do. But they turn off their wifis what? Yeah?
• 1:03:22
  They because it's smart. Yeah, I don't blame them. I'm not gonna
• 1:03:24
  lie. Like when they close, they take it off the plug, Bro,
• 1:03:28
  and then you're just fucking Because there's a spot that has killer Wi Fi
• 1:03:31
  Bro, Silver Lake. This place is called Dinosaur Cafe. Are I've been
• 1:03:36
  there? Yeah, yeah, Yeah, I've been there. It's good.
• 1:03:37
  Yeah, it's it's a solid spot and they and they got really fast Wi
• 1:03:40
  Fi. You've been there, yeah, Dinosaur Cafe. That's what does this?
• 1:03:44
  What does a show called hungry? So? He actually I just went
• 1:03:45
  there because they have dinosaur in front of it, and dinosaur so I was
• 1:03:49
  just like, you's got a little autistic there for a secon, He said,
• 1:03:53
  dinosaur. I like dinosaurs. I want to play with it, that's
• 1:03:58
  what That's what I went there and it was they said no dinosaurs on the
• 1:04:02
  coffee. I was like, what the fuck? There was not no dinosaurs?
• 1:04:06
  Yeah, I know, not even one. It was so disappointing.
• 1:04:09
  I was like, why the did you naming this? There wasn't even a
• 1:04:12
  picture of it. Dinosaur na bro. I thought it was super dinosaurs.
• 1:04:15
  I thought I was just I was leaving fucking like it. Just the drawing
• 1:04:19
  autistic people, they get it every every moment, an autistic kid's gonna end
• 1:04:26
  up there. I mean I thought he was gonna play with his friends.
• 1:04:30
  I would start, and that would start a business. Just to like do
• 1:04:32
  people like that? I was fucking coff. Just all you gotta, dude,
• 1:04:38
  is worry about the exterior of the business and then just drop people and
• 1:04:40
  you go in there be like what do you want? Yeah, that's what
• 1:04:43
  it is. They really you in with the bullsh that's what you know.
• 1:04:45
  How I found you? I mean what made be like, oh yeah,
• 1:04:48
  how'd you even find me? It was the fucking clip where the gout parked
• 1:04:50
  in front of his house. Yeah, it was like, it's fucking true,
• 1:04:56
  and I was like, god damn it. And I was like who
• 1:04:57
  and I had already U guy telling you the way to get laid stop watching
• 1:05:02
  fucking porn. Oh okay, I really do believe that if you want to
• 1:05:04
  get stop watching porn, your day's gonna go find yourself some pussy. It's
• 1:05:10
  gonna yeah dude. If not, you're gonna be nutting at night all night.
• 1:05:13
  But those are your two options. Yeah, dude, I go to
• 1:05:15
  night. But yeah, if you don't, if you don't take care of
• 1:05:18
  it's gonna take care of themselves. But I watched that video and I was
• 1:05:20
  like, damn, that fool's right. Yeah, I think it is right.
• 1:05:25
  It wasn't no, So why so why did you ask me? By
• 1:05:27
  Andrew? So? Why did you ask me on the podcast? Him brou
• 1:05:30
  Because then because you're a comic. And then I went down your list,
• 1:05:32
  I was like, oh, this was cool, And I mean you've been
• 1:05:34
  on the Fourth Wall. I saw I've seen you do have seen the Fourth
• 1:05:36
  Wall. So I was like, I'll hit this one up. And I
• 1:05:39
  was like, and I did not know you lived in a van And I
• 1:05:41
  was like, this ship went on a whole different, fucking different tanks.
• 1:05:43
  So what were you gonna ask? What? Were comics? Just fucking comics?
• 1:05:45
  He what's up? And he's a comic too, So it's but like
• 1:05:49
  I said, fucking Jewish and fucking down the fucking RV rabbit hole. I
• 1:05:54
  know, Man, you live such a like I mean, you're you live
• 1:05:59
  like in your own your own name, bro, like that ass as you're
• 1:06:01
  out here doing it in your own terms. That's that's kind of cool,
• 1:06:04
  dude. Bro, We're all entrepreneurs here, you know what I mean.
• 1:06:09
  So, like the best thing about that is you control your time, You
• 1:06:14
  control your shit. You decide how much money you want to make today,
• 1:06:16
  You decide how many girls you want to fuck to, Like like time is
• 1:06:21
  your is in your hands now, you know what I mean. Like nobody's
• 1:06:25
  controlling you. There's no like, oh you have to clock in now,
• 1:06:27
  you know. So it's like do what the fuck you want? Bro,
• 1:06:30
  Like fuck the whole like idea lot like the prestige lifestyle we're all chasing,
• 1:06:35
  you know what I mean, dude, Like, dude, go down,
• 1:06:38
  Bro, look how much cooler it is down there? Stop trying to climb
• 1:06:41
  up to Like, oh well, once I get this, like fucking chrome
• 1:06:44
  down Lamborghini and then like I'll be happy Like nah, Bro, once you
• 1:06:47
  get this fucking van that breaks down every one hundred miles, then you'll be
• 1:06:51
  happy, bro, because you're gonna look around you and be like, fuck,
• 1:06:54
  I didn't know how much shit I had, bro, Like up until
• 1:06:57
  now, we're like, damn, there's people really fucking starving out here.
• 1:07:00
  Don't have shit like like, dude, it's it's it's a like every days
• 1:07:04
  in a fucking adventure. It's lip bro. I mean, you seem pretty
• 1:07:08
  happy. You don't seem like you get angry. Yeah, I get angry.
• 1:07:12
  Bro. It's like you don't seem like a very angry person. You
• 1:07:15
  seem like a very uh you ever seen The Big Lebowski's a movie familiar?
• 1:07:19
  See you have very uh dudism. You know what does he have? Like?
• 1:07:24
  Uh, it's like a character called the dude there who's just lives very
• 1:07:28
  like he kind of has that same mentality you having a sense man, I
• 1:07:31
  got laid on the rent. Yeah, Like he's just like someone breaking into
• 1:07:36
  your band and you're telling him can you come back later? I'm tired?
• 1:07:41
  Yeah, you gotta, you gotta That's that's actually like a very iconic film.
• 1:07:44
  It's like a cult classic. What's it called The Big Lebowski Like you
• 1:07:46
  saw it? Yeah? Because because I didn't know. I didn't know they
• 1:07:49
  bowling it, so I saw it. I love I told him, He's
• 1:07:54
  all, you're gonna watch it, You're gonna like it? Like, No,
• 1:07:56
  it doesn't look funny, I mean great, like the bowling part.
• 1:08:00
  He's like me, like the day I watched Count Carner. You watch counter,
• 1:08:04
  you watch movies just for like titty scenes. I bet I have before.
• 1:08:08
  I like, I do watch a jay Have you watch the Jailo film?
• 1:08:11
  Just because Jaylo's in there? I watched some Why am I watching this
• 1:08:14
  Made in Manhattan? No? But I watched that car with Tiffany Hattish just
• 1:08:17
  came out. I don't watch any Tiffany Haytes films, So I don't know.
• 1:08:20
  But Mark was Mark was Shaisky was Steppl's name. He made it,
• 1:08:24
  So I think you might like him. I think you like him. You
• 1:08:26
  don't know him, don't talk? Actually, no, Tippy had I'm lost.
• 1:08:30
  Don Kye don't like either. Yeah, dude, are you gonna go
• 1:08:33
  to Puffcorn? No? If I'm gonna be at skink Fest. Do you
• 1:08:38
  not see how he never listensk Fest bro what you want to call dude,
• 1:08:41
  But that's a comic. You should drive out there. Skank Fest it's the
• 1:08:44
  first. It's the biggest comedy festival and uh Vegas called skink Fest. This
• 1:08:48
  this is this is the comedy. Yes, this is right before Xavier says,
• 1:08:54
  let me go with you. No, I'm already got right, but
• 1:08:57
  you can talk as long he's got nuit skank Fest Fest Afar is gonna be
• 1:09:00
  there, Sam TRIPLEI, fucking all the people from the East coast you ever
• 1:09:04
  heard of? Like, it's like all right, So it's like it's like
• 1:09:09
  a festival. It goes down like just pure comedy and it's it's like,
• 1:09:13
  can you explain it better? It's like a high time. It's just it's
• 1:09:16
  hard to explain because it makes no sense. It's basically like do you want
• 1:09:19
  to explain it? It's basically like a music festival for comedy. So this
• 1:09:25
  guy named Luis J. Gomez, he runs a gas digital out there in
• 1:09:29
  New York and he runs the skink Fest podcast. He get he made a
• 1:09:31
  festival where he just books like a hundred comedians for sure, But yeah,
• 1:09:36
  like Kim CON's gonna be there, Rifer last time, Louis J. Gomanz.
• 1:09:41
  I mean, lu Louis c K showed up, Bill Burr will show
• 1:09:45
  up. It's dope and it's already sold out, but I'm pretty sure you
• 1:09:49
  can get in, and you seem like a way that you'll figures figure it
• 1:09:53
  out. But it's in Vegas. It's a three day festival and everyone's just
• 1:09:55
  going up live podcast live festivals. It'll be three stages of people going on
• 1:09:59
  at the same time, and you can decide where you stand up, stand
• 1:10:01
  up. It's like a music festival from a stand up Yeah, just like
• 1:10:04
  out and Ship, but it's like rolling out yeah, and it's sold out.
• 1:10:08
  It's all everyone, Like if everyone's gonna be Yeah, it's pretty tight.
• 1:10:12
  That's what I was going for, like a rolling loud. I was
• 1:10:14
  like, I'm like, what's the festival like his age demographic? Yeah,
• 1:10:19
  you gotta speak in a whole new lingo with me. Bro, You're like,
• 1:10:21
  dude funk he's wearing overalls and ship with paw Patrol. Yeah, like
• 1:10:26
  you know shit baby shark baby Yeah wait wait bro go bro, dude,
• 1:10:34
  how do you how you fuck that song? Up so bad. I don't
• 1:10:38
  know it. Baby shark dude, dude, there you baby shark. Do
• 1:10:43
  do do do do baby shark dude, dude, do do baby shark?
• 1:10:47
  Person made so much money, shark shark Bay feels like he's at home,
• 1:10:58
  daddy shark dude, dude, Dad, I don't like what's what's what was
• 1:11:08
  his? Like? Child? What are your child? The cartoon? Can
• 1:11:11
  you play that? Brow? I'm kind of like in the mood for that
• 1:11:14
  right now. I don't even think I car I don't even think I.
• 1:11:15
  Carly was in his demographic. Wait you watch Carly? I did b Yeah,
• 1:11:20
  yeah, Bro, I fucking hated that ship. Well you didn't think
• 1:11:25
  him and get his bro, I was waiting for Friday to fuck car Yea,
• 1:11:30
  we are waiting for dude. Oh god, dude, it never happened
• 1:11:33
  yet, Like even when they were adult, dudeent and I fucking gos like,
• 1:11:36
  oh this episode I heard he they got in the same bed. Nope,
• 1:11:40
  still fucking was a pussy. Dude, Dude, sounds like you and
• 1:11:44
  your van. Bro. Yeah he does. He's already yeah, he's already
• 1:11:47
  got him on the bed and then he just fucking lets it go. Bro.
• 1:11:50
  That's kind of why I hated it, because I really connected with his
• 1:11:54
  character. I was like, bro, why are you not fucking either?
• 1:11:56
  Bro? What the hell one of us has to do it? Take one
• 1:12:00
  for the tea. Their new season just come out. I fuck, I
• 1:12:04
  don't know. You got to watch it? You know what? I always
• 1:12:05
  thought low key thought Freddie was going to produce their first porn though. Got
• 1:12:13
  the cameras, got the fucking streaming, got the WiFi, got the green
• 1:12:16
  screen. I Carly, I don't know that was that was. That wasn't
• 1:12:23
  on my mind. I thought, so you know, you got the camera.
• 1:12:25
  I mean I wanted a camera. The first time I started sucking.
• 1:12:28
  I was like, how do I record? Right? Like the camera?
• 1:12:30
  Bro? Yeah? I was like, you've been thinking about the sex,
• 1:12:33
  Bro, you're just all right? So I got an update, said Harper's
• 1:12:36
  what is it? They got a comment said, it implies that they have
• 1:12:40
  not had sex yet. But I but I believe that the show will make
• 1:12:44
  it clear when they do. Wait, what, that's pretty hard that who
• 1:12:49
  has not has sex? Like? Yeah, well, I think as a
• 1:12:54
  whole I talk people watch it because they're really waiting for that moment and then
• 1:12:57
  once it happens. No one's watching anymore, you know, like we're on
• 1:13:00
  the reddit for him. You know, Dan Schnyder was all over. That
• 1:13:02
  is Dan Schneider. Fucking Spencer. Do you know who Dan Schnyder is.
• 1:13:06
  No Or Snyder is the director of Like or the No, he's not the
• 1:13:11
  director. He created the shows. No, No, No, producer,
• 1:13:15
  producer. Yeah. So he's like the main producer of Nickelodeon, and he's
• 1:13:18
  like pedophile and he's like, was like doing some preppywron. Come on,
• 1:13:25
  it's pretty, it's pretty. It's just right on. If you're on,
• 1:13:29
  if you're on, if you're in a jacuzzi with underage girls, dude,
• 1:13:33
  you're kind of already should be in jail. Bro. Why do you think
• 1:13:35
  he started Nickelodeon? Bro? That kind of all goes to it. He
• 1:13:40
  has his business. Bro, He's like, how can I get more kids
• 1:13:44
  around me without a being you know what I mean? And that's how he
• 1:13:47
  did it. I mean people like he was nutting on him. It's just
• 1:13:50
  like that's probably how Carly got on. Bro. He's like, before you
• 1:13:54
  get on that videotape, get on this one, bro. Just fucking actually
• 1:13:57
  really think Dan Schneider invents in Nickelodeon. Oh no, he didn't invent Nickelodeon,
• 1:14:00
  but he did. He did. He did direct it in the way
• 1:14:05
  if he wanted to, dude, he had. He had a Freddy's Good
• 1:14:11
  Freddy's gonna bone her. Dude, Yeah, he's gonna bone her in this
• 1:14:14
  new season. I'm a watch or Sam someone. Why No, nobody wants
• 1:14:17
  to boone Sam? Sam? Willa give you like VD or something? Oh
• 1:14:19
  yeah, Sam, Sam's lesbian though, right, I don't know about real
• 1:14:24
  man. You see a record? Nah, she boned Mike will wait it.
• 1:14:28
  Yeah, I don't know if Bro Sam would like. She was just
• 1:14:30
  always like a tomboy. Like I just never vibed with her. I was
• 1:14:34
  like, I was like, dude, you gotta be feminine. Yeah,
• 1:14:36
  Bro, some makeup. I don't want it. I don't want an aggressive
• 1:14:42
  hand job, you know. Yeah. Yeah, she looks like she'll give
• 1:14:44
  you a rash after yea, you know what I mean. She'll take off
• 1:14:49
  the hood like, pull it way too back, dude, Yeah, pulled
• 1:14:54
  it so bad it just fucking comes off. She'll circumcise you just like that.
• 1:15:00
  Bro's like, you're Jewish, Yeah, just like that. She's out
• 1:15:03
  here making jews, Brod. Did you ever watch Get Rid of Sam?
• 1:15:06
  Did you ever watch Shameless? Huh? Did you ever watch Shameless? You
• 1:15:10
  know there was a there was a time period of my I was dating like
• 1:15:14
  a white white girl. Bro She liked that show and she liked that show,
• 1:15:15
  and I would just pretend to like it, all right. So the
• 1:15:18
  reason I brought it up, there's a character in that show that all his
• 1:15:21
  brothers, he's a character in the show, and his brothers are all circumcised
• 1:15:25
  and he isn't. But he's too old to get circumcised, but he wants
• 1:15:27
  to do it anyway. So he goes to the doctor and he gets some
• 1:15:30
  circumcised, and he gets stitches, and then he gets hards on and the
• 1:15:33
  fucking stitches ripped. Dude, I don't think you can get circumcised later,
• 1:15:36
  Like, can you get circumcised? Now? Why would I want to do?
• 1:15:40
  But can you? Is that a possibility? I think you can,
• 1:15:43
  But it's but imagine being that old, like watching you can have him?
• 1:15:47
  Oh my god, That's what I'm saying. Yeah, it would be ripped
• 1:15:50
  the stitches go ahead, what no, fuck the stitches? Your mind,
• 1:15:53
  bro? This whole your whole life. You've been growing up with this like
• 1:15:57
  ugly uncircumcised day full, you know. And then and then how old are
• 1:16:01
  you? Bro? Thirty thirty thirty one forward? You have a whole new
• 1:16:05
  dick. It's like you look down and you see it completely different. Penis
• 1:16:10
  pretty now, huh pretty now. It's like I don't even know you anymore.
• 1:16:13
  I know you. It doesn't even want to talk to you anymore.
• 1:16:15
  You're like, come on, bro, we had to do it. Bros
• 1:16:18
  so many, You're gonna look lose. It's gonna suck because I'm gonna lose
• 1:16:21
  some of my girth ness because it's an extra layer, the extra layer.
• 1:16:26
  Really, yeah, I got girth. You fucking up got extra girth weight
• 1:16:30
  of the whole thing. Yeah, this is girth. It's a layers.
• 1:16:35
  Show up. Baber is not a fucking eyelid, bro, Like you know,
• 1:16:43
  yeah, he's making She's like it's like a violid over it. Okay,
• 1:16:46
  now's the turtle neck, bro, Yeah, lock dude, gotta get
• 1:16:51
  Yeah, I lost my turtle neck, bro, a whole v neck right
• 1:16:55
  now. What happens when you get like like when the rabbi doesn't like what
• 1:16:58
  happens to the skin is the rabbi. Oh no, not the rabbi.
• 1:17:01
  Technically the rabbi keeps it. Bro's He's like, yo, free, dude,
• 1:17:05
  he gives it. He sells us to the priest. Bro because the
• 1:17:09
  rabbi is Jewish, He's like, how can I make extra money off all
• 1:17:12
  this extra skin? And the priests like, yo, I'll fucking I'll buy
• 1:17:16
  that shit off you. And then the Jews happy makes money, the priests
• 1:17:19
  happy fucks his kid. Seem that sounded like like like a premeditated dad joke
• 1:17:25
  a little bit, you know what I mean, Like the priest told the
• 1:17:28
  rabbi and then how you ruin Thanksgiving? Yeah? Exactly, Yeah, that's
• 1:17:30
  what that sounds like. Let ruin Thanksgiving dinner story? But I actually just
• 1:17:34
  made it up because I'm a genius. Yeah, dude, I feel like
• 1:17:39
  you had those those those moments you know, do you go to your family
• 1:17:44
  like get together and shits, you've been living in the man. I'll go
• 1:17:47
  up there like once some months, yeah, and it's just like do they
• 1:17:51
  check that. They just like waiting for you to be like, oh,
• 1:17:54
  the day's day's gonna sells? Man? Uh nah nah. Maybe like passively,
• 1:18:00
  but I don't feel that energy. Bro, Like, I just do
• 1:18:03
  what I do, bro and like and and and even if they have a
• 1:18:06
  problem with anything I do, they know that I won't listen to them,
• 1:18:10
  so they don't even bother, you know what I mean, Like they'll try
• 1:18:13
  to give me advice and shit, do you have siblings? Yeah? Yeah,
• 1:18:15
  some of my I have. I have a younger one else I used
• 1:18:17
  to have too, and I have just a little sister. Yeah. Are
• 1:18:21
  your parents like super like? I feel like, I imagine because after losing
• 1:18:27
  like a loved one like that, you know what I mean? And then
• 1:18:29
  like are you and your parents tight? Yeah? And then we all got
• 1:18:32
  tighter? Yeah, imagine we all got more like like we we had to
• 1:18:36
  like build each other after that, you know what I mean, because like
• 1:18:40
  it was like how do we move? How do we continue? You know
• 1:18:42
  what I mean? And this guy got Papa John's calling them Actually they're calling
• 1:18:46
  the podcast. Yeah, hell yeah they can call the podcast. Yea,
• 1:18:53
  thank you for calling them. We don't smoke. The same podcast was this
• 1:18:58
  mom Boy George Paris right here at George presunds like a whole advertisement by Oh
• 1:19:08
  Brons j D Stories and sons and installations. You know, if your lawn
• 1:19:15
  is looking like the one from training days, Oh my god, up j
• 1:19:20
  D's and sons. I I was it was good, was good. I
• 1:19:28
  was waiting for Tommy to interrupt or side dicks say I'm ready to suck today's
• 1:19:31
  dick. It was good. Dog? Are you coming out mallow up today?
• 1:19:38
  Man? So what's going on with your do you know? I was
• 1:19:41
  like, coming, This is ex bodyguard from the bay. That was like
• 1:19:46
  earthquake, baby, let's go. Oh that's Chris food. What's up?
• 1:19:50
  Dog? You owe me ll hey, you owe me way more money.
• 1:19:55
  Dog, you owe me a jersey? This foe hits me up asking me
• 1:19:58
  y'all. I I fucked up and I crashed the car, or as I
• 1:20:01
  get down till he crashed the car, and then you asked me, can
• 1:20:03
  you photo shop that I didn't crash the car. I was like, bro,
• 1:20:08
  I don't do this. She's like, come on, they don't admit
• 1:20:10
  to insurance. Allegedly it's on the patron. I don't think. I don't
• 1:20:14
  think his insurance comfery watches the patroon. It's better pay five books, better
• 1:20:17
  pay five bucks. And now you kind of want them too, bro.
• 1:20:20
  And then and then he was like, I was like, I got you
• 1:20:24
  since he's a patron subscriber. I told him I dud it for like twenty
• 1:20:26
  bucks. But I was like, if I get you a new car,
• 1:20:29
  dog, you gotta come through. Hey, you ain't get They accepted the
• 1:20:33
  photos and there from there we just got the ball rolling that that fucking hand
• 1:20:38
  I had it was sucking total. So they cashed it out and then you
• 1:20:42
  know I was able to give me my new whip and I got twenty bucks.
• 1:20:44
  Do you do you think that's a fair tracker. That's a good way.
• 1:20:46
  That's a good reason for y'all to join the Patriots. Yes, see
• 1:20:48
  what I do with the patron subscribers. If it went through, I'll go
• 1:20:56
  get you a jersey boy. And I say that you didn't say that you
• 1:21:00
  need to commit cell phone fraud? Bro? Right, Yeah, I was
• 1:21:01
  thinking. But if anybody needs some photoshop work, maybe change your bank cout
• 1:21:08
  statements. I did that for some hire a Filipino and the Philippines. Bro.
• 1:21:12
  The hell, bro, stop stepping on my loop. Nobody speaks out?
• 1:21:19
  What did they speak? Top? Top? What's up? Dog?
• 1:21:26
  Thank you? Thank you? And you know we're taking that w today,
• 1:21:28
  so you better be mad out there for some Jose earthquakes. Couldn't be out
• 1:21:30
  there. It's not not playing, I know, but it could have been
• 1:21:32
  there. We're we're in the eighth place right now. We can't suck up
• 1:21:38
  these last two games and we're fucking so. I mean, it's kind of
• 1:21:42
  do or die for us. We gotta win. We gotta win up these
• 1:21:44
  games. Guess we won't see you in the playoffs, but let y'all go.
• 1:21:53
  I'm on my luge, but inside can ask us fool? I appreciate
• 1:21:57
  it, every boy, stay up, Thank you, good luck against Minnesota.
• 1:22:05
  Lates And I was at the George Presidentation give it to him? Was
• 1:22:10
  that, Yeah, that fool was here the show a lot, bro,
• 1:22:15
  I was. I thought I thought there was genuine like a whole advertisement calling
• 1:22:18
  us like I thought, police, Yeah, Bro, do you want your
• 1:22:23
  lawnmode today? I was like, oh shit, I kind of do.
• 1:22:26
  Bro. Wait a minute, you ain't even got a lot of I was
• 1:22:28
  like, even got a lot and you were buying. I was like,
• 1:22:30
  you're a great sales pitch. Alright, I'll make al on for you.
• 1:22:32
  Bro. Let mean, let me fucking let me do this, yeah,
• 1:22:38
  man, for sure. You know, I was thinking. I was like,
• 1:22:42
  how he said, Ila home, let's be rolling up, I'd be
• 1:22:44
  running over so many foods. I accidentally ran over a homeless guy's foot.
• 1:22:47
  Bro. No, yeah, you're his hero. Wasn't little hero? Was
• 1:22:54
  he just trying to break in? Or what was he doing? H Bro?
• 1:22:56
  It was it was it was like such a like h like spontaneous thing.
• 1:23:00
  Dude. I was in my van and apparently there was like a homeless
• 1:23:04
  guy like sleeping on the sidewalk right in front of my van, and his
• 1:23:08
  feet were in the fucking road. Damn and fu yeah, bro, and
• 1:23:14
  I fucking I was leaving the area and I crank my internet drive and I
• 1:23:17
  bumped over something and I was like what the fuck? And I was kind
• 1:23:20
  of confused. But it was like a one way street. So as soon
• 1:23:23
  as I drove off, I realized I see like a homeless guy like screaming.
• 1:23:26
  I was like, fuck, dude, Like, so I had to
• 1:23:29
  go. I had to go back around to get him. But dude,
• 1:23:32
  it was like it was downtown LA, so it was only like one sway
• 1:23:35
  road. So by the time I came back, it was like a good
• 1:23:38
  seven minutes. It's I I actually get back to him because there's so much
• 1:23:42
  traffic too, and I was just like waiting all this guy's just fucking screaming
• 1:23:45
  on the side over this foot. I'm just like sitting there in traffic like
• 1:23:47
  bumping like M and M and shit like that's why they call me slim shadey,
• 1:23:51
  that's right. And then I go, yeah, baby, and I
• 1:23:55
  go and I go around and he's there. He's still there, brou.
• 1:23:58
  I had to call the cop on myself, dude, And I was scared,
• 1:24:02
  nah, bro, because I'm not like that, dude, you know
• 1:24:05
  what I mean, Like I'm d just called a bit like I saw some
• 1:24:08
  other dude in the van run this guy's feet over. Well, this is
• 1:24:11
  my This is what was going on in my head. Obviously, like you
• 1:24:13
  think about everything, like should I go? But like I was like,
• 1:24:15
  bro, the consequence would be so much worse if I like ran over this
• 1:24:18
  guy and just dipped you know what I mean, you killed and they found
• 1:24:21
  out. No, Bro, you won't believe how the police handled it.
• 1:24:24
  That was what disappointed me. They showed up and beat him up, You
• 1:24:30
  idiot, wi your feet on the fucking road. We told you, Nah,
• 1:24:35
  so what happened? You call the cops like yourself? What you talking?
• 1:24:38
  I ran someone over? What I'm saying, I gave him cragpiess for
• 1:24:43
  free, dude. Yeah, they gave me souvenirs for running them over.
• 1:24:45
  Thank you for helping the Los Angeles community. Please don't stop. That was
• 1:24:50
  the vibe they gave me though, because this is what happened. So I'm
• 1:24:54
  I talked to the guy before. I don't want to call the cops yet
• 1:24:57
  because I'm I'm I'm kind of scared. What's this guy doing. He's just
• 1:25:00
  swirling on the ground like, oh, ran over my black Mexican black black
• 1:25:08
  Okay. He's like, you ran over my foot? Did you have Jordan's
• 1:25:11
  time? Nah? Bro, get some like new balance. Bro. I
• 1:25:15
  was like, I'm like, yeah, they were white and now they were
• 1:25:18
  black a little. I was like, hey, bro, now, man,
• 1:25:23
  you pull up. This is just a wake up call. You got
• 1:25:25
  to get a new dribb nah soop. So I pull up and and he's
• 1:25:30
  like, bro, you ran over my foot. And I'm like, what
• 1:25:31
  can I do? Man? Like I was really trying to knock up.
• 1:25:35
  That's actually what happened, Bro, like like I was like, I was
• 1:25:39
  like, so I go, I'm gonna call the ambulance can Amy and she's
• 1:25:44
  like, He's like, I'll call the whole thing. He's like. I'm
• 1:25:45
  like, I'm like, I'm like I kind of don't know. I'm like,
• 1:25:46
  can you try to walk on it first before like general conclusions. I'm
• 1:25:49
  not trying to help. And I'm like, I like, touch his foot,
• 1:25:51
  I'm like touching homeless. Yeah, bro, I'm trying to avoid calling
• 1:25:55
  the cops right now. Yeah, I know. I literally just watch his
• 1:26:00
  ankle. I literally felt the AIDS. Yeah, aids, dude. So
• 1:26:02
  I'm like he's like, it seems like he's not really in painful. He
• 1:26:05
  goes like this, He's like all right, I'll call it off. He's
• 1:26:11
  like, just give me, give me some like some like some like ADVIC
• 1:26:15
  like some like pain relievers and I'm like I don't have any. And he's
• 1:26:18
  like, then, go to go to CVS and buy me hennessy And I
• 1:26:24
  was like what He's like, yeah, like buy me, buy me,
• 1:26:28
  buy me alcohol. I'll call the whole thing off. What I was like,
• 1:26:31
  and in my hand, I was still called the cops. I would
• 1:26:33
  have bought him tul bottles of handy. I would have bought the block handy
• 1:26:36
  I was, dude. I was like, I was like, okay,
• 1:26:39
  it's like forty bucks. I was like, shit, I think I'd rather
• 1:26:42
  call the cops. You know what I mean. I'm like a dog,
• 1:26:47
  whow you just earned your fucking du It's plack, dude, now I word
• 1:26:54
  for this. Bro. Come on now, dude, I call the cops.
• 1:26:58
  Bro. I'm like, yeah, I just turned over a homeless guy's
• 1:27:00
  foot, like somebody come out here. Two minutes. Bro, it came
• 1:27:03
  fucking quick, like like two am, two ambulances, like a fire truck,
• 1:27:10
  like two cop cars. Get scared. You're like, nah, that's
• 1:27:13
  it was the same thing when my sister died. Like it was the same
• 1:27:15
  pull up scene, like just pull up from every fucking corner around like cornered
• 1:27:18
  in and uh I just I just kind of felt it again. I was
• 1:27:21
  like, damn, like reliving this ship. But nah, bro, they
• 1:27:24
  circled me and my van, so my van was trapped in there too.
• 1:27:27
  And as soon as they get there, I started explaining the story like to
• 1:27:30
  the firefighter without him asking me to, and he notices it's a homeless guy.
• 1:27:34
  So he just looks at me and he goes like it's okay, it's
• 1:27:36
  okay. And I'm like, I'm like, don't you want to hear what
• 1:27:41
  happened. He's like, no, it's fine, it's fine. And I
• 1:27:44
  was like, I was like what and he's like, yeah, you can
• 1:27:45
  leave if you want. And I was like what. I was like what
• 1:27:47
  the fucks? I get in my van to go. I'm like, god,
• 1:27:49
  dude, they're letting me go. Like that's cool, brod feel bad,
• 1:27:53
  Like you feel bad, you know. He's like, I didn't spend
• 1:27:55
  forty bucks. Yeahly, bro, I don't have to spend forty bucks.
• 1:27:59
  Guys let him? Yeah, fuck it, bro. And I didn't ask
• 1:28:01
  for my idea or anything like. So I get in the van, but
• 1:28:03
  I'm trapped. So I try to get out, but they're like just wait
• 1:28:08
  and then the cops show up. And now the cops did want to talk
• 1:28:11
  to me, so that they were like the cop went around my work,
• 1:28:14
  they would have blocked you off. You would have been my lady at home.
• 1:28:17
  Yeah, So, I mean I still felt bad. I wanted to
• 1:28:19
  like go buy some food and like come back or something. But here's the
• 1:28:24
  reason, Like here's how yeah exactly, you know, get him, get
• 1:28:27
  him some food, yeah with yeah that So he fucking so the cop start
• 1:28:33
  talking to him and they're like kind of smiling, like giggling, and then
• 1:28:36
  the cop like one of the cops, like the cop like the woman's there's
• 1:28:40
  a woman or a man. He's like kind of like chuckling nerves of going
• 1:28:43
  around my van to my window, tells signals me to roll down the window.
• 1:28:45
  And then she looks at me like this, did you run over his
• 1:28:51
  foot? And I go, I go, yeah, like very seriously she
• 1:28:57
  goes and I go what he's going on right now? I'm like, I'm
• 1:29:02
  like what, like, like, aren't you going to do you think She's
• 1:29:04
  like happens all the time. I was like, what the fucking who's running
• 1:29:11
  these homes people's foots over? Why is this a regular ass? Then this
• 1:29:15
  is the new punching brad dude, dude, So I asked him, so
• 1:29:17
  what are you gonna do? Like are you what are you? Are you
• 1:29:19
  gonna help him? We're gonna try to see if like he wants an ambulance,
• 1:29:24
  even though the ambulance is already there, and if he doesn't, then
• 1:29:28
  like then like it's it's all good, Like you can go once we leave,
• 1:29:32
  and I'm like, I'm like, he's fun, Like his foot just
• 1:29:36
  got run over by a giant man. You're not gonna do anything. And
• 1:29:40
  then she goes hold one second and then goes around my vad back to the
• 1:29:44
  homeless guy. She's like looking at him, talk at him, starts chuckling
• 1:29:46
  again. He's in a cigarette. I asked him. I rolled on the
• 1:29:51
  window and he's like, he's like, I want a bag of chips and
• 1:29:58
  a blanket. And then and then she like chuckles her way back to my
• 1:30:00
  van and she's like, he doesn't need an ambulance, it's fine. He
• 1:30:04
  just wants a bag of chips in a blanket. Bro, they didn't even
• 1:30:08
  gave him the fucking bag of chips. They just gave him a blanket.
• 1:30:12
  And I was like, I was like, bro, you didn't even do
• 1:30:14
  He didn't even do what he said, you know what I mean, Like
• 1:30:15
  these people suck. Well, that's what he gets for being a piece of
• 1:30:17
  shit and asking for a bottle hendy when all he needed was a blanket and
• 1:30:20
  some chips. He probably did it on purpose, dude, at the price
• 1:30:24
  of his foot do you think he okay? What you think that's the get
• 1:30:26
  down and let me sta what if they don't even? What if they like
• 1:30:30
  have a piece of wood, Yeah, piece of wood. They just slapped
• 1:30:34
  the wood right under it. You feel you ran something over. They throw
• 1:30:39
  the wood back, and they're like, get me a bottle, Hendy,
• 1:30:41
  because like you mean, he don't want to be like who anything else in
• 1:30:44
  your chaser? Yeah, they make you feel bad. Yeah, it's a
• 1:30:46
  guilt or like if strategy. That's why mean, that's why they were laughing
• 1:30:49
  too. They're like this food foot ain't broken, like because I'm not gonna
• 1:30:53
  lie like I wouldn't. I wouldn't. I wouldn't. What I'm trying to
• 1:30:56
  say to he trying to finance you? He was financing bro Hey, but
• 1:31:00
  who ended up winning? Dog? How you win? I called the cops.
• 1:31:03
  I gotta spend a story. I got material, You got material and
• 1:31:08
  I didn't spend. No, I'm gonna start fucking head like I started driving
• 1:31:12
  around downtown La more. Now I know for sure next time, if I
• 1:31:15
  remember a homeless guys foot, I'm just leaving. Yeah, no, Hendy,
• 1:31:19
  dude. So that's the thing. Man, I left in shock bro,
• 1:31:23
  because I was kind of like, that's how they treat the fucking homeless
• 1:31:25
  here, brou and and I drove off and if you're lucky, yeah,
• 1:31:30
  I don't know. It seemed like I actually ran his foot over, you
• 1:31:33
  know what I mean. But like I I was just probably it was like
• 1:31:36
  that, like it was like did you see it? Like you saw like
• 1:31:40
  I mean, I just I just saw. I saw him immediately, like
• 1:31:43
  once I look at the window, just like roll back crap. That's not
• 1:31:46
  that hard, dog, it's not fuck dude, Oh my god, I
• 1:31:50
  got good, bro, got by homeless. I got got by my own
• 1:31:55
  strategies. Dog, dude, fucks some type of shit. I wouldn't been
• 1:31:58
  would I would have grabbed them every told would have been like this little pig,
• 1:32:00
  hurt this little pig. That's what I did. Though. I was
• 1:32:02
  like touching his ankle and shit, and I'm like, how does it feel?
• 1:32:05
  How does this feel like it? Dude? Fuck, I don't know.
• 1:32:09
  I didn't see like a slab of wood or nothing like. I was
• 1:32:12
  like, I don't know, bro, man, I got fucked. Bro.
• 1:32:15
  No, But because think about it, bro, something fucking ran over
• 1:32:17
  your foot, you'd be hysterical. Bro, there's no such thing. You
• 1:32:20
  on bagage chips in a blanket. He was probably like, I like the
• 1:32:25
  hendy. I believe the handy. At that point, I was like,
• 1:32:26
  dude, I need some handy. Yeah, but like hit him be crawling
• 1:32:29
  on the floor. You got got nine. I think we got out the
• 1:32:33
  conclusion that this book got you. Oh my god, well he tried to
• 1:32:38
  I got away without spending a dime, bro, he said no, But
• 1:32:42
  like that's the thing, bro, you know what, That's why I go
• 1:32:45
  for the verbal because I try to avoid like dropping the bands. When the
• 1:32:47
  guy was mugging me, the reason why we were talking for so long was
• 1:32:50
  because I was refusing to give him any money. Bro. I was like,
• 1:32:56
  I was, I was the guy that you don't want to be with
• 1:32:58
  when you get mugged, because I'm the guy. He was like, nah,
• 1:33:00
  Bro, like I'm keeping all this money, you know what I mean?
• 1:33:03
  So like if like when when you like you, have you ever been
• 1:33:06
  mugged? No? Not like a gun point you got robbed before? No?
• 1:33:12
  I said no, I never, not, never a gun point anything
• 1:33:14
  like that. So I've been like scammed that that kind of robbed, but
• 1:33:17
  never like with a gun point. Thank thankfully, I always had mine on
• 1:33:19
  me. Oh okay, oh shit, all right. Yeah. I was
• 1:33:23
  like, but if I've been robbed, it's been like I've been duped,
• 1:33:27
  like you know what I mean, Like I got got through a scam.
• 1:33:29
  Somebody sold me some fake shit or something like that. Yeah, thankfully knock.
• 1:33:31
  When nobody's ever come up to me and just been like, yo,
• 1:33:34
  what up? Give me your ship? Like I've never been mugged either,
• 1:33:36
  Like he says, I've been scammed for like you're getting scam king over here,
• 1:33:42
  but scam. He gets scammed for everything, tickets. I'll buy tickets
• 1:33:45
  on offer up or shit like that for sold out events that weren't sold I
• 1:33:48
  just like, you know, he had three months ahead of time to buy
• 1:33:50
  tickets. I guess scam like like I got scammed like that a couple of
• 1:33:54
  times. Or you don't go on the actual ticket site like oh it's sold
• 1:33:58
  out. I go to sold ot events where sold out? And so what
• 1:34:00
  does he do? He goes on Twitter and finds an account with a hot
• 1:34:03
  Tricks picture on it. It's like she's trustable and gets fucked. Chick wasn't
• 1:34:08
  even hot, but yeah, you pay them money I mean I sell them
• 1:34:12
  money for the ticket. He buys it from a scalper. That's a scammer.
• 1:34:15
  Oh yeah, every fucking time. That's a lie. I've been scammed
• 1:34:19
  like a couple of times. But it did suck because they've been pricing.
• 1:34:23
  One of the woman's like, you're getting scammed by my people, Bro,
• 1:34:26
  it doesn't matter. I'm just going. I end up going anymore. He
• 1:34:28
  just pisses me off because I'm like, fuck now, I definitely got to
• 1:34:30
  go on because there's no I mean, you better have a good time if
• 1:34:32
  you're paying double bitch. The same with the buffet, bro, you better
• 1:34:35
  get that food if you're fucking Next time I go to buffet dog, I'm
• 1:34:40
  gonna bring it upward. Bro, bring everything you can and then put bring
• 1:34:45
  a backpack, bring that shit in. But that's only a five star hotels
• 1:34:47
  three stars, you're solid, yeah, oh yeah, three stars. You
• 1:34:50
  could just fucking you could take the whole tray out as soon as they put
• 1:34:54
  it. I wanted a lot of your row. It's probably the same class
• 1:34:58
  of food, Like it's the same level. It's just like they have fancier
• 1:35:00
  plates and ship but it's all just fucking the same weird looking eggs that hotels
• 1:35:05
  have. Like it's all it's all the same. It's very rare that you
• 1:35:09
  see, Like you look at some buff eggs, You're like, damn,
• 1:35:11
  those are some good eggs. It's always the first batch that looks the best,
• 1:35:13
  though, because like I would always get up. I'd be like,
• 1:35:15
  especially when I was in Vegas, and like the coke would be wearing off,
• 1:35:18
  i would still be waking up like earliest fuck, so I'd be there
• 1:35:21
  like fucking this in the morning. What am I gonna do? Let's go
• 1:35:24
  eat. So I'd go fucking down there soon, go down there and eat,
• 1:35:27
  and I'm like, oh, I always noticed the first bats looks the
• 1:35:29
  best. And after that it's just like fucking give it to the cows.
• 1:35:31
  Give yea yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. But but I'm not
• 1:35:34
  gonna lie. I'm gonna try that next time. Next the next time we
• 1:35:36
  go to Vegas, let's get an airbnb Vegas. Do it tomorrow morning,
• 1:35:40
  bro, gets yourself some free fucking bag walking. Just walk into the there's
• 1:35:45
  a whole there's there's a nice hotel about my path. Make sure it's not
• 1:35:47
  five stars five and and I've already hey, let's blog it. Let's go
• 1:35:53
  to that hotel. Hey, but let's I got you gotta want to shout
• 1:35:56
  out my strategy though, you gotta you gotta do it and shout it out.
• 1:35:59
  I think we gotta do it at the hotel. We should. You
• 1:36:00
  should join us as a guest on one of them. We should, And
• 1:36:02
  then we should just be like, we should look like tourists. We can
• 1:36:05
  get we can do it at a hotel like near Disneyland. We just show
• 1:36:09
  up with a bunch of disney years, so they think we for sure stay
• 1:36:11
  there and we just walk in and eat. Dude, Oh my god,
• 1:36:14
  just put a Yeah, dude, what you need Bro's It's the simplest manipulation
• 1:36:18
  is you could just walk in there with this. They're like, oh,
• 1:36:21
  dude, that would be a great place for you to do it. There's
• 1:36:24
  so many hotels there. If you just walk if you got like a shirt,
• 1:36:28
  or if you got like a little Mickey hat and just put it on
• 1:36:30
  and go to a different hotel every time, and you're like, oh,
• 1:36:32
  I'm just gonna fuel up before I go to a day of Disneyland, and
• 1:36:35
  just fucking you could do it at the hotels and nots and a universal,
• 1:36:41
  dude, universal, the one that's right here on. Yes, dude,
• 1:36:45
  you could go to those hotels and just just buy like some go to it
• 1:36:48
  like they have some fat hotels. Broa people paid for that. Oh you
• 1:36:54
  has to do is just go to like good women buy a hat. This
• 1:36:56
  associated to any ip there, so that I wouldn't be surprised if those places
• 1:36:59
  aren't making money off food, like you know what I mean, because like,
• 1:37:01
  like dudey, there's so many tourists there who come to these places to
• 1:37:05
  spend money. They probably look for like a wristband or something that says like
• 1:37:10
  oh, I fucking I have the all inclusive version or something. But but
• 1:37:14
  there's there is that loophole there. There is that loophole. I'm I'm I'm
• 1:37:16
  by universe loophole. He didn't think it was a good loophole. As a
• 1:37:20
  guy's a Jewish guy, I'm running through it. You don't do this at
• 1:37:25
  fucking calls, Junior. You don't do this jack in the box. You
• 1:37:27
  do this at in and out five guys. You go up there and tell
• 1:37:30
  me you want to double cheeseburger. Oh, here we go. When you
• 1:37:32
  get a cheeseburger. You met when you get a double cheese but you mean
• 1:37:35
  you're like, no, I went, I mean I want two cheeseburgers,
• 1:37:39
  and they'll let you keep that one, and they'll give you two cheeseburgers.
• 1:37:42
  Now you got three. You know what, dude, that will work.
• 1:37:45
  That will work because then you cuse, we're right in and out. It's
• 1:37:47
  so busy. We're like like just like okay, but it's also like it's
• 1:37:53
  it's it's a loophole. That's not like but it's like, you know what.
• 1:37:57
  Here's the thing. There's two types of mistakes. You should ask.
• 1:38:00
  She should tell you do you mean a double cheeseburger or cheeseburger? What if
• 1:38:02
  they verify it? And then no, I meant two double cheeseburgers, like
• 1:38:08
  two double cheeseburgers, like four cheeseburgers. Like see what I mean. It's
• 1:38:15
  confusing, like no one's gonna argue with you because it's just gonna be like,
• 1:38:17
  all right, I guess I'm miss You're just high as fuck, bro,
• 1:38:19
  Like, dude, I feel like someone that to me and I was
• 1:38:24
  wearing it's just the fuck up McDonald's McDonald's. And now you want a real
• 1:38:29
  little that you can do, and we'll work one hundred percent of the time.
• 1:38:32
  All right, this is what you do. Bro, go to Chipotle
• 1:38:36
  and I heard this from all this body Asia, shard and shout out Asia.
• 1:38:42
  So you go to you go to fucking up Chipotle and instead of getting
• 1:38:45
  on burrito, you get a bowl and you ask for two tortillas on the
• 1:38:50
  side, so they give you one anyway, so you just ask for another
• 1:38:55
  one, and then once they fill up that bowl, you can make two
• 1:38:59
  Burris goes out of that bowl for the same price as a burrito. You
• 1:39:02
  get two burritos, same fucking servant size. I like that. That's a
• 1:39:08
  good hack right there. Here's another one that I do. You guys go
• 1:39:12
  to seven eleven. Yep, I love seven to eleven. You're gonna love
• 1:39:15
  this love at seven to eleven, so I have the worst I see that's
• 1:39:20
  the word you are for gas to leave. Anyways, I'm gonna hug this
• 1:39:24
  guy up then, Bro, this one's for you, man. So it's
• 1:39:27
  what you do seven and Bro, you have people watching, so you can
• 1:39:30
  have them do it right now. Bro, if I were you, as
• 1:39:32
  soon as I say this, you drop the link in that chat and we
• 1:39:35
  don't gonna want to do this. We don't smoke the same if you do
• 1:39:39
  this, okay, so or not, it won't work like that. I'll
• 1:39:42
  show you how it works. So they have a app, right, the
• 1:39:45
  rewards app. You have that ship yeah, so every time you yeah,
• 1:39:50
  I use it all the time, every every it is bro. But here's
• 1:39:56
  the thing. Every time you make a purchase, you get more points,
• 1:39:58
  but it takes a while. So they have so you get every like a
• 1:40:00
  thousand points. You get like some six shit, but it's like a lot.
• 1:40:03
  You get to buy a lot of shit. So they have this rewards
• 1:40:06
  thing where if you refer a friend, they give you a thousand points for
• 1:40:12
  free. So what I did was was you to refer friend. They just
• 1:40:15
  needed to sign in with their own phone number. So I just went on
• 1:40:17
  fucking Google number and made just a shit son of Google phone numbers and just
• 1:40:23
  started referring myself. I was getting so much free ship dude. Then they
• 1:40:27
  patched it, bro, So you can't do that, but now you could
• 1:40:30
  just like like you could be like to your podcast, like, hey,
• 1:40:33
  use this link. I just dropped it into the chat below. Everybody go
• 1:40:36
  make a seven eleven account under my referral code right now, and then you
• 1:40:41
  get like thirty thousand points, Bro, you get like unlimited shit. Bro,
• 1:40:44
  You'll get like fucking freehold pizza's wings like toktoes if you like them,
• 1:40:48
  like whatever the fuck you want. This is just like poor people hacks,
• 1:40:51
  bro nahn, not that I just didn't me that just cancer. All here
• 1:40:57
  is cancer cancer. But I will say the Buffalo Chicken roller hits different,
• 1:41:01
  especially if you're high. You'll love that ship. Bro. I'm abusing that.
• 1:41:05
  I'm for sure abusing that. Hey man, I honestly I had a
• 1:41:11
  lot of fun this morning. Dog. This is you're you're very funny individual.
• 1:41:15
  Dog. I definitely want to check out one of your shows. But
• 1:41:18
  let's give it up for Guy Reuben. That chin. Where can they check
• 1:41:24
  you out? On your social media? So on Instagram, I'm a guy
• 1:41:30
  Googley, guy gu l y. That's on every platform, so TikTok,
• 1:41:33
  YouTube, Facebook, just look me up, Guy Reuben. I say,
• 1:41:38
  Facebook is surprisingly My Facebook page is pretty big. Yeah, it's like bigger
• 1:41:42
  than like Instagram. You have to do with the Israel what like what I
• 1:41:47
  did there? Yeah? Is there? Al? Nah? Nah? It's
• 1:41:49
  just like like stand up comedy fans. I think I have like twenty six
• 1:41:53
  thousand or twenty seven on Facebook. It's see we sleep on that ship,
• 1:41:57
  all right, don't sleep on Facebook. I don't even got one that's sleeping
• 1:42:00
  on that. But here's the thing. One of my videos just blow up
• 1:42:01
  on Instagram too, So now starting to like climb. But yeah, I
• 1:42:04
  did like a gay joke, and now my fucking dms are just flooded with
• 1:42:09
  gay guys. But I know, I think I saw you talking about sucking
• 1:42:12
  dick or something like that. Nah, Like I was like I made a
• 1:42:14
  joke like hey you want like this guy like look nervous, have to made
• 1:42:16
  a gay jokes. I started fucking with him like hey, meet me in
• 1:42:18
  the bathroom, bro, and he just started getting like really nervous and shit,
• 1:42:21
  and uh it was like really funny, like an experience, like it's
• 1:42:26
  a situation and dude, I swear to you. Bro. My fucking dms
• 1:42:30
  just like guys just like you're hot, I want to fuck you, like
• 1:42:33
  put that nose in my ass like shit like that. Yeah, dude,
• 1:42:38
  like they don't hold nothing back, the whole nothing backdogs even comments. Somebody
• 1:42:43
  get a compilation of Xavier's sus things and let's make a video and get him
• 1:42:46
  some gay dms. No, oh yeah you will, Bro, this guy
• 1:42:50
  do this. If you look at the comments I would have would dude,
• 1:42:54
  my dude, I think i'd get thirty thous I think I hit thirty thousand
• 1:42:58
  followers if you Yeah, if I did some some shit like I would probably
• 1:43:00
  get the gay guys like being hit. You know what I mean? Oh
• 1:43:02
  yeah, you're a bear. No, you'll get you hit like the he'll
• 1:43:08
  get Like the Famine game guys was big. They know what he wanted,
• 1:43:12
  they know what they want. Oh my god, all the same bro,
• 1:43:15
  even the comments, same ship. Bro, just like put that. I
• 1:43:18
  wonder what that nose does. Put it in my holes? Like I was
• 1:43:25
  like, Bro, what the this nose smells? My guy? Like they're
• 1:43:29
  like this, Bro, our fans are. Our fans are in that game.
• 1:43:34
  I didn't know mine either, dude. Fuck dude, look uh not
• 1:43:40
  very careful at your shows. Yeah, I get roofy with that nose.
• 1:43:43
  Bro. I've been I've been attempted roofy before. Dog, It's crazy you've
• 1:43:46
  been what I've been roofed before, mistakenly like it's fucking crazy. Bro,
• 1:43:50
  like you don't remember shit make you snort a roofy Damn bro, what the
• 1:43:56
  hell that don't wish from that kind of shit? He man like I said,
• 1:44:00
  thank you for thank you for coming out. Thank y'all, b Ray
• 1:44:03
  shout outs. Shout out to guy ruined for coming through. Man. Yeah,
• 1:44:08
  baby, anytime come through. Follow me in Morning Shot Films, I
• 1:44:11
  gen YouTube. Check out my website Morning Shot Films Dot CEO. Tomorrow on
• 1:44:15
  the Morning Real podcast, I will be putting out I Love You Man,
• 1:44:19
  featuring Xavier Guerrero, and on Friday, I'll be putting out Boys in the
• 1:44:25
  Hood like that movie, one of my favorite LaHood movies of all time.
• 1:44:30
  Who's the dad? What's his name? Uh? Fucking I want to say
• 1:44:34
  Forrest Whittaker, but I know it's not Forest with its fucking neo. Yeah,
• 1:44:39
  Neil, it's not. No, it's Morpheus R Morpheus. Yeah,
• 1:44:42
  that's the Papa thought that you would want Xavier hit that light bun subscribe.
• 1:44:46
  We'll see you guys tomorrow Double Decker. It's gonna be lit. And uh,
• 1:44:50
  I don't know if he's don't brought those up, but you guys better
• 1:44:53
  not miss out on those candles. Got litt over there. Yeah, there's
• 1:44:55
  there's what we don't smoke, the same one coming out and the hats too,
• 1:44:59
  that Mexican bre Come on, We're gonna say the last thing. Just
• 1:45:04
  wow, there you go. Thanks, Thank everybody for tuning in. Thank
• 1:45:13
  everybody who's been joining the Patreon. We are almost a three hundred registered people
• 1:45:16
  for the event October fourteen, So go to the High and Hungry Experience dot
• 1:45:20
  event bright dot com. Uh, there's VP bags left. Don't miss out
• 1:45:25
  at least a two hundred dollars a VP bag that will feature sponsors like pro
• 1:45:29
  pen Cali, Blaze Puff Sauce, California Magic Farms, and amongst other Doctor
• 1:45:34
  green Thumb a couple of things from Doctor Greenham as well, including a funk
• 1:45:38
  because I'm gonna get a box for you guys, so it's probably gonna be
• 1:45:41
  the best VP bag that you guys have ever got. Like I said,
• 1:45:45
  don't miss out October fourteenth. That is in the city of Huntington Beach and
• 1:45:48
  tickets are free. Also for everybody who's been wanting to what is It?
• 1:45:54
  Go to one of the dispensary events for minute. What is It? Baitpen
• 1:45:58
  line. Make sure you guys save the date October thirteenth. October thirteenth,
• 1:46:02
  that is it. Uh is the dispensary on Centro. If I'm not mistaken,
• 1:46:08
  let me get you guys the actual information for it here. It is
• 1:46:13
  God damn it. Sorry about that, but yeah, so I will be
• 1:46:15
  posting the information on my Instagram so you guys can actually follow it and actually
• 1:46:20
  check it out. But it is in South La. October thirteenth is gonna
• 1:46:25
  be a big party going down and the dispensary, So if you guys want
• 1:46:28
  to come by Barts Bart because its gonna be cooking up some food. We're
• 1:46:30
  gonna have special deals on the propan also go check them out at Green Angel
• 1:46:33
  eight one eight. They have a deal once a month where you can what
• 1:46:38
  is it, buy one and get one. So it's pretty dope for everybody
• 1:46:41
  out there. And we did set out last time, so I appreciate everybody
• 1:46:43
  who went by. And yeah, flavors Bodies on dot com the new High
• 1:46:46
  and Hungry Hayes can only it was thirty of these These are from last year,
• 1:46:49
  but with a new scent and the High and Hungry, which is potion
• 1:46:51
  one I'm sorry. We don't smoke the same which potion comes out sometime next
• 1:46:56
  week. I'm getting the stickers, so look forward to it. Thank you
• 1:46:59
  to all the vendors that rest out. There's still a few a few booths
• 1:47:01
  left if you guys want to come and join us, But it is gonna
• 1:47:03
  be a pac day. See you guys are craft of your kings, and
• 1:47:05
  we'll see you guys tomorrow for a pack day, all right, Peace out. D