Latest / These 2 Shouldn't Have A Podcast / Smuggling 116 Lizards on a Bus + Spiders, Cats, Wicked & Wild Mate Stories | EP002

Transcript

Smuggling 116 Lizards on a Bus + Spiders, Cats, Wicked & Wild Mate Stories | EP002 · These 2 Shouldn't Have A Podcast

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to These Two Shouldn't Have a Podcast.
• 0:02
  SPEAKER_00: Coming up today, we discover if you're gonna smuggle lizards across the border, why you should not use a bus.
• 0:10
  SPEAKER_00: Customs officers were in for shock when they searched, found a woman trying to cross the Russian border and discovered 116 lizards hidden in her jacket.
• 0:20
  SPEAKER_00: The passenger was on a bus that stopped at a checkpoint.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_00: There's just so many questions.
• 0:28
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe they've got little bombs inside them.
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_01: You can't say that.
• 0:34
  SPEAKER_01: I I just I I'd like to ask I'd like to meet this wood lady and ask her why.
• 0:39
  SPEAKER_01: Would you want to see a lizard?
• 0:41
  SPEAKER_01: Excuse me, I'm gonna see a lizard.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_00: I've been searching around and I've found some really interesting stories.
• 1:20
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, here we go.
• 1:21
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna get me through that way.
• 1:23
  SPEAKER_00: Right, this is on this is on I'm not gonna tell you who it's with.
• 1:26
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 1:28
  SPEAKER_00: But let's just say it's it's a site that has some unusual news stories.
• 1:33
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 1:33
  SPEAKER_00: Um Right, I'm gonna read out the title because it caught my eye, right?
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_00: And and then I'll read a little bit about the article because it's fucking nuts.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_00: Um so, woman caught trying to cross border with 116 reptiles stashed in her jacket so many questions.
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_00: I remember that and I thought 116 reptiles.
• 2:06
  SPEAKER_00: 116 and it's got like a photograph of the article.
• 2:10
  SPEAKER_00: Um but it's got a photograph of like a bearded dragon.
• 2:13
  SPEAKER_00: Where she put that?
• 2:15
  SPEAKER_00: Well, see this is why it got my intrigue, right?
• 2:18
  SPEAKER_00: So customs officers were in shock when they searched a woman.
• 2:27
  SPEAKER_00: When they searched a woman trying to cross the Russian border, and again, think of all the shit that's going on at the moment.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_00: It's like, what's important to you at the moment?
• 2:35
  SPEAKER_00: Surviving, being involved in like a little bit of a bit of a war.
• 2:38
  SPEAKER_00: So she calling a train to Russia or so yeah, um, trying to cross the Russian border.
• 2:43
  SPEAKER_00: So I think she yeah, I think escaping Russian.
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, Poland, Poland, Poland, she was coming from Poland.
• 2:49
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe they've got little bombs inside them.
• 2:52
  SPEAKER_00: You can't say that so anyway, customs officers were in for shock when they searched, found a woman trying to cross the Russian border and discovered 116 lizards hidden in her jacket.
• 3:06
  SPEAKER_00: The passenger was on a bus that stopped at a checkpoint.
• 3:14
  SPEAKER_00: Anyway, this is in August, August, uh August 25th.
• 3:17
  SPEAKER_00: So, inspector searching the clothing and found dozens of small little canvas bags concealed in the inside lining of her jacket.
• 3:26
  SPEAKER_00: Each pouch contained three to five reptiles about 10 to 15 centimetres long.
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_00: 10 to 15 centimetres long, 116 of them.
• 3:40
  SPEAKER_00: Let's just say, right, 116 pencils or 116 pens, you'd struggle to conceal that.
• 3:46
  SPEAKER_00: What there's just so many questions.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_00: Go on then.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, one why?
• 3:54
  SPEAKER_00: I'm I'm not aware that they're they're like a really you know expensive commodity, lizards, right?
• 4:00
  SPEAKER_00: Certainly not when they're little babies, right?
• 4:04
  SPEAKER_01: But why?
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_01: Do you know what I mean?
• 4:09
  SPEAKER_01: It's like so she's going from Poland to Russia, or is she going from Russia to Poland?
• 4:14
  SPEAKER_00: No, no, she's trying to cross the Russian border into Russia.
• 4:18
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, so she's she's in Poland, on a bus, right, 116 lizards in a jacket.
• 4:23
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 4:25
  SPEAKER_00: So each uh little canvas bags, three to five lizards per bag stashed in a jacket.
• 4:32
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe she only started off with like five and they multiplied in the bags.
• 4:38
  SPEAKER_01: Well no, no, well maybe, maybe.
• 4:41
  SPEAKER_01: I mean I don't know how long it takes to get from Poland to Russia, to be honest, but Well she doesn't.
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_00: She clearly didn't.
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_00: No, no.
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_00: Don't lizards need it to be warm?
• 4:51
  SPEAKER_00: Well, yeah, but it would be.
• 4:52
  SPEAKER_00: I mean it did clearly.
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_00: It's warm in Russia.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_00: Well no, it said canvas bags, and she's been kind enough to put them inside a jacket, so it might be.
• 5:00
  SPEAKER_00: It's cold in Russia.
• 5:02
  SPEAKER_00: Not always.
• 5:04
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, but it's colder than it is in the U.S.
• 5:06
  SPEAKER_00: I've been over to I've been over to Ukraine many years ago, as you know.
• 5:10
  SPEAKER_00: During the day, fing hot.
• 5:12
  SPEAKER_00: During the night, freezing cold.
• 5:15
  SPEAKER_00: I suppose they're gonna be in tanks, these lizards, unless she's gonna let them escape.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_00: I'd say I had visions of this there's a god, what's the film?
• 5:22
  SPEAKER_00: I can't remember the movie.
• 5:24
  SPEAKER_00: There's a movie where they basically strap like little bombs to rats and the I think it's the uh Wanted.
• 5:31
  SPEAKER_00: Is it not?
• 5:31
  SPEAKER_00: Not Wanted.
• 5:32
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my god, can't remember it.
• 5:34
  SPEAKER_00: I can't remember the film.
• 5:35
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, I know there's a war going on, anyway, but I think that's a bit extreme.
• 5:40
  SPEAKER_01: Lizard Warfare.
• 5:42
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, the way yeah, the way your mind's working there, is it I'm I'm guessing you were reading this article thinking What were you thinking?
• 5:52
  SPEAKER_00: Even reading thinking bombs in their bellies, and then I thought, no, that's bad.
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe they're poisonous, and she's gonna, you know, let them let them go.
• 6:02
  SPEAKER_00: Because there's no love lost, is there, between you know, Poland and and and Russia.
• 6:06
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, Poland have helped an awful lot of Ukrainians sort of like, you know, helped house them and stuff.
• 6:12
  SPEAKER_00: So there's no love loss.
• 6:13
  SPEAKER_00: So I thought, you know, is this an attack?
• 6:15
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, there's the there's a lot of drone stuff going on at the moment.
• 6:19
  SPEAKER_00: It's like, are these just like a biological type of drone?
• 6:25
  SPEAKER_00: They could be poisonous, they could multiply, and then eat all of the they could alter the ecosystem because they're eating all of the bugs and shit like that.
• 6:33
  SPEAKER_00: 116 though.
• 6:35
  SPEAKER_00: But yeah, but but like the like the point you've made though.
• 6:37
  SPEAKER_00: I mean it might not have started off as 116, it might have been 20 and 20 little bags, and then they've I don't know why I'm doing that.
• 6:45
  SPEAKER_01: Is that our lizard to do it?
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_01: I um I think it's more I mean I I just I I'd like to ask, I'd like to meet this lady and ask her why.
• 6:58
  SPEAKER_01: Would you want to see a lizard?
• 6:59
  SPEAKER_01: Excuse me, I'm gonna see a lizard.
• 7:01
  SPEAKER_01: I I I just I just I mean, was she a big girl?
• 7:05
  SPEAKER_00: I d I don't know.
• 7:06
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
• 7:07
  SPEAKER_00: Hang on, hang on, I'll find out, I'll find out.
• 7:10
  SPEAKER_00: I I don't it's it's shown a picture of shown a picture of the lizards.
• 7:14
  SPEAKER_00: It's it's it's it's not shown a picture of her though, hang on.
• 7:18
  SPEAKER_00: I thought that was them, but that's that's a different story.
• 7:22
  SPEAKER_00: But no, I mean that look that that's that's that's the outcome.
• 7:25
  SPEAKER_00: I mean that's not 116, but but anyway.
• 7:29
  SPEAKER_00: So no, um apparently though it's I mean hang on, hang on though.
• 7:35
  SPEAKER_00: So these particular lizards are known for their dramatic defence display when threatened, flattening their bodies, opening their mouths to expose copious folds of skin at the sides.
• 7:46
  SPEAKER_00: I mean that but that's not a weapon though, is it?
• 7:48
  SPEAKER_00: Anyway, I don't know.
• 7:51
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know it's it's a weird fucking world, isn't it?
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_01: I just genuinely I just don't know where you're going with that one, to be honest.
• 8:02
  SPEAKER_00: I mean I was just amazed by it.
• 8:04
  SPEAKER_01: I understand people smuggle stuff, and maybe that's what she was doing.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_01: It'd be interesting to know whether she was actually a Russian lady anyway, smuggling them back in to sell them.
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_01: That's a good point.
• 8:15
  SPEAKER_01: We we we only ever sort of see the news, don't we?
• 8:19
  SPEAKER_01: They'll only always g give you pickings, you know.
• 8:23
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, yeah.
• 8:23
  SPEAKER_01: It could be, as you've made out a warfare.
• 8:28
  SPEAKER_01: I think you probably think something better.
• 8:31
  SPEAKER_01: Uh it's not very good for the animal rights, is it?
• 8:34
  SPEAKER_01: If they're gonna blow themselves up.
• 8:35
  SPEAKER_00: I I mean I'm I'm not I mean lizard bombs.
• 8:39
  SPEAKER_00: But whatever way you look at it, I mean, even if they are like suicide lizard bombs, even if that was the intention, or if it wasn't the intention, she's still not thinking of animal welfare or reptile welfare stuffing 116 into little bags and put them in a jacket anyway, right?
• 8:53
  SPEAKER_00: So the outcome of what happens to them, whether they explode or not, I don't think that's the the real thing.
• 8:59
  SPEAKER_00: So what should she have done?
• 9:01
  SPEAKER_00: If I wanted to transport 116 lizards across the border, I'll probably pay for someone else to do it to be honest.
• 9:10
  SPEAKER_01: That is mad.
• 9:11
  SPEAKER_01: I just don't.
• 9:13
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, that wasn't on Granada reports, was it?
• 9:16
  SPEAKER_01: Well no, it wasn't, but I did say that I'd I'd looked at a not a specialist site, but a but a a site, right?
• 9:23
  SPEAKER_01: I just don't understand people's logic.
• 9:27
  SPEAKER_00: There must have been some good money in it.
• 9:30
  SPEAKER_00: Looking at it, either that or she really has a fetish for lizards.
• 9:34
  SPEAKER_00: Like the feel of them wriggling in a jacket.
• 9:37
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, of all the places you had to put your hands, it was like Because that's where pockets are.
• 9:42
  SPEAKER_00: They're down there, but um but you have pockets there as well, don't you?
• 9:46
  SPEAKER_00: Inside pockets, you know, in inside pockets.
• 9:50
  SPEAKER_00: It it didn't say, it just said they were in the canvas bag.
• 9:54
  SPEAKER_00: No, in inside inside the oh yeah, it did actually, yeah, it did say in the lining of the gun.
• 9:58
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, okay.
• 9:59
  SPEAKER_00: Sorry, officer.
• 10:00
  SPEAKER_00: Fucking are you border control now?
• 10:02
  SPEAKER_00: Where have you had these lizards strong?
• 10:06
  SPEAKER_01: Do you know what I mean?
• 10:06
  SPEAKER_01: I wonder whether they had a tip off.
• 10:10
  SPEAKER_01: If he were but hang on a second, hang on.
• 10:16
  SPEAKER_01: She's picked the wrong dragons, though, hasn't she?
• 10:18
  SPEAKER_01: Ding.
• 10:18
  SPEAKER_01: So if she's gone for the like chameleons, they could have just like hidden the buttons.
• 10:24
  SPEAKER_01: The ones with the weird yeah, but they're bigger.
• 10:28
  SPEAKER_00: Not baby ones.
• 10:29
  SPEAKER_00: She could have just took hundreds instead of 160.
• 10:31
  SPEAKER_00: Well those those, I mean, yeah, 10 10 to 15 centimetres.
• 10:34
  SPEAKER_00: They were they were baby ones.
• 10:35
  SPEAKER_00: But but yeah, I see your point, like the whole camouflage thing.
• 10:38
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
• 10:39
  SPEAKER_00: I wonder if the go, if she was wearing like a camouflage jacket, they'd actually pick up the whole, you know, like the but imagine, right?
• 10:46
  SPEAKER_00: You said about a tip-off, right?
• 10:48
  SPEAKER_00: Imagine being the border control taking that phone call.
• 10:53
  SPEAKER_00: It's like yes, is that is is that you know the Russian border control?
• 10:57
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, yes, it is, it is.
• 11:00
  SPEAKER_00: Beware, there's a bus coming with a woman on 116 lizards in it.
• 11:06
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I mean Would you even say that seriously?
• 11:09
  SPEAKER_01: Even if he hadn't got the tip off.
• 11:12
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, I'm not being funny, like I don't do stuff like that, lizards and stuff.
• 11:17
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, I'd be screaming down the bus, mate.
• 11:19
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, yeah, yeah.
• 11:20
  SPEAKER_01: I'd get my gun out me, give us a weather.
• 11:23
  SPEAKER_01: I probably would.
• 11:24
  SPEAKER_00: And you were talking about like lizards, right?
• 11:27
  SPEAKER_00: Before.
• 11:27
  SPEAKER_00: And now you're talking about shooting.
• 11:29
  SPEAKER_01: Everyone on the bus will probably get shot by me.
• 11:32
  SPEAKER_01: Because I'll be just like I'll be just in a state of hysterics.
• 11:36
  SPEAKER_01: And this this is why you're not border control.
• 11:39
  SPEAKER_01: Well, this is it, yeah.
• 11:40
  SPEAKER_01: And the same with spiders, don't do spiders and stuff like that, you see.
• 11:44
  SPEAKER_01: Oh no.
• 11:45
  SPEAKER_01: I can do them with the hair.
• 11:47
  SPEAKER_01: He's on special sights and he can only do them with the hairy.
• 11:50
  SPEAKER_01: Fuck you now.
• 11:51
  SPEAKER_00: Um spiders.
• 11:55
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 11:55
  SPEAKER_00: Spiders.
• 11:56
  SPEAKER_00: If if they're like as big as your hand and hairy, like tarantulas are, right, they look like little animals with lots of legs.
• 12:04
  SPEAKER_00: That is a whole different world than ones that have no hair and just look reptilian like little fucking alien things.
• 12:12
  SPEAKER_00: I'm more scared of smaller spiders with no hair than big spiders with lots of hair.
• 12:20
  SPEAKER_00: Right?
• 12:21
  SPEAKER_00: Aren't you?
• 12:22
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, let me ask you a question.
• 12:23
  SPEAKER_00: Would you be more scared of me naked?
• 12:26
  SPEAKER_00: Right?
• 12:27
  SPEAKER_00: Or fully clothes?
• 12:31
  SPEAKER_01: Well one It's a good question, right?
• 12:34
  SPEAKER_01: Well, it's not really, is it, when we're talking about spiders.
• 12:37
  SPEAKER_01: But the fact that you're putting putting yourself as a naked spider now?
• 12:41
  SPEAKER_01: Is that what you're saying?
• 12:42
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I was just using it as as an example.
• 12:44
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, you'd be more scared if I if I'm I'm watching the hole you're digging here, and I love it.
• 12:53
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, um let's move away from me naked.
• 12:55
  SPEAKER_00: No, no, you brought it up.
• 12:57
  SPEAKER_00: No, so spiders, yeah, again, go back to spongy don't you think that furiness makes things cute?
• 13:03
  SPEAKER_00: Look at our cat, our Sphinx cat.
• 13:05
  SPEAKER_00: You looked at it and thought, well, what the fuck is that?
• 13:08
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it is.
• 13:09
  SPEAKER_00: It's like a grown in that's eaten after 12 at midnight.
• 13:12
  SPEAKER_00: Have you seen some of the photos of like bears without skin?
• 13:15
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 13:16
  SPEAKER_00: And dogs without without not without skin.
• 13:19
  SPEAKER_00: Without fur.
• 13:20
  SPEAKER_00: Without skin it just being messed, right?
• 13:23
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 13:24
  SPEAKER_00: Anyway, spiders.
• 13:25
  SPEAKER_00: Hairy.
• 13:26
  SPEAKER_00: But you're just as scared of big hairy spiders.
• 13:29
  SPEAKER_01: It's still a spider.
• 13:31
  SPEAKER_01: Whether it's got hers, whether it's whether it's walking around with sunglasses on, it's still a spider.
• 13:35
  SPEAKER_01: But what's the bit what's the bit that scares you?
• 13:38
  SPEAKER_00: Because a lot of people aren't scared of a spider, they're scared of the speed.
• 13:42
  SPEAKER_00: Have you seen Spider-Man?
• 13:45
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 13:45
  SPEAKER_01: He got bit by a spider.
• 13:47
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, but if you go to Australia and get bit by one, you're dead in it.
• 13:51
  SPEAKER_01: How do you know they're not poisonous?
• 13:55
  SPEAKER_00: But, okay, I get you.
• 13:57
  SPEAKER_00: But ranchulas, fairy ones, big ones.
• 14:00
  SPEAKER_00: They can kill you.
• 14:01
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 14:01
  SPEAKER_00: But they're slow as fuck.
• 14:02
  SPEAKER_00: Have you seen them?
• 14:03
  SPEAKER_00: It doesn't matter.
• 14:04
  SPEAKER_00: You look at them in the vivariums, they're the tanks that and the like.
• 14:07
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 14:08
  SPEAKER_00: Oh you're here, are you?
• 14:09
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna bite you.
• 14:10
  SPEAKER_00: Gonna bite you in a minute.
• 14:11
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, but yeah, okay.
• 14:12
  SPEAKER_01: But you just said if it's not hairy, yeah, you're scared of them.
• 14:17
  SPEAKER_01: So if it's on the wall and it's not hairy, you're still scared of them, whether it's moving or not.
• 14:22
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, we we had one in the back is the fucking biggest thing.
• 14:25
  SPEAKER_01: Exactly.
• 14:26
  SPEAKER_00: So it's not moving, so it's not the speed.
• 14:28
  SPEAKER_00: It's the fact that I know in a minute, when it sees me, when it sees me, or when it thinks, ah, that fucker's gonna kill me, because I uh yeah, I'm a spider killer, not a spider capture and release, right?
• 14:39
  SPEAKER_00: Um when it sees me, I know it's gonna run.
• 14:43
  SPEAKER_00: No, you shouldn't drop it.
• 14:44
  SPEAKER_00: No, no, no, you can't no, because you know what these this I don't know if this is an old life's tail or not.
• 14:49
  SPEAKER_00: But because apparently they detect the water quite quickly, and then they close up like that to make to make themselves not waterproof but protect their innards, and then they go down the down the plug hole, yeah.
• 15:01
  SPEAKER_00: And then when you're sleeping, fucking crawl back up again because they're not they're not drowned, they're not dead.
• 15:06
  SPEAKER_00: Now, if you saw a spider with its legs out like that, like on a sun lounge or something, then you know it's fucking dead, but you know ones that do that, it's not dead.
• 15:13
  SPEAKER_00: See the spider murderer, yeah.
• 15:16
  SPEAKER_01: I'd make a fucking good villain, I would I just don't yeah, don't don't do spiders.
• 15:25
  SPEAKER_01: Don't do cats.
• 15:28
  SPEAKER_01: I've got I've got I've got a thing about cats.
• 15:32
  SPEAKER_01: What what's your thing about cats?
• 15:34
  SPEAKER_01: Cats are for witches.
• 15:38
  SPEAKER_01: Every witch you know has a cat.
• 15:40
  SPEAKER_01: So you're calling Lona a witch?
• 15:42
  SPEAKER_01: No, no, no, no.
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_01: That's not what I said.
• 15:45
  SPEAKER_01: I'm saying cats are for witches.
• 15:48
  SPEAKER_01: Not everyone who's got a cat's a witch.
• 15:51
  SPEAKER_01: I see it that all witches who are evil and stuff are like cats.
• 15:56
  SPEAKER_01: So I see cats as evil.
• 15:58
  SPEAKER_00: Not people who own the cats, there's a difference.
• 16:00
  SPEAKER_00: So the cats are evil not so okay, well that let's run with that logic though, that makes no sense.
• 16:06
  SPEAKER_00: It makes plenty of sense.
• 16:07
  SPEAKER_00: A witch decides to get a cat, yes, a cat doesn't pick a witch owner.
• 16:11
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, it might do though.
• 16:12
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, you reckon?
• 16:13
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, because what if it's a straight cat and it just tags along?
• 16:16
  SPEAKER_01: The witch starts feeding it and then it's picked its owner, hasn't it?
• 16:20
  SPEAKER_01: Suppose.
• 16:21
  SPEAKER_01: See, there's logic in my madness all the time.
• 16:24
  SPEAKER_01: If you're a cat, would you really pick someone who's like green?
• 16:26
  SPEAKER_01: Why does a witch have to be green?
• 16:28
  SPEAKER_01: You watch Witch of the West.
• 16:32
  SPEAKER_01: You watch too much wicked.
• 16:35
  SPEAKER_01: Hang on, hang on.
• 16:36
  SPEAKER_01: Have you seen you've seen the film Wicked then obviously?
• 16:39
  SPEAKER_01: Well, it's more of a musical, but in fact yeah.
• 16:42
  SPEAKER_01: But it's still a film come out as a film with Aniana Grande or whatever she's called.
• 16:46
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 16:47
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, but is she not a witch?
• 16:48
  SPEAKER_01: No.
• 16:49
  SPEAKER_00: She's just a fairy godmother.
• 16:51
  SPEAKER_00: No, she's not.
• 16:54
  SPEAKER_00: No, she's not fairy godmother.
• 16:58
  SPEAKER_00: You seriously think that she's a witch?
• 17:00
  SPEAKER_00: She's a witch.
• 17:01
  SPEAKER_00: Fuck off.
• 17:04
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 17:05
  SPEAKER_01: She's the good witch.
• 17:06
  SPEAKER_01: Go back to Because she's not the good witch in the film, without giving too much away.
• 17:10
  SPEAKER_01: Because the good witch is the green witch.
• 17:12
  SPEAKER_00: But anyway, if you go back to the um the original, the lion was fucking nuts in that.
• 17:19
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, you're on about the wizard of oz now.
• 17:21
  SPEAKER_00: But it's based on the same story.
• 17:22
  SPEAKER_00: No, it's before the wizard of Oz.
• 17:27
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I know.
• 17:28
  SPEAKER_01: But bear with me.
• 17:29
  SPEAKER_01: So Ariana Grande is not the f er the fairy.
• 17:32
  SPEAKER_01: The fairy godmother.
• 17:34
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, I assume she was.
• 17:35
  SPEAKER_01: No, she was her friend in witch school.
• 17:38
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, but she ended up being the the fairy godmother, didn't she?
• 17:43
  SPEAKER_00: Still a witch.
• 17:44
  SPEAKER_00: That just sounds wrong when I say it now, is that right?
• 17:48
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna Google it.
• 17:49
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna Google it because I d I mean you've actually now got me wondering if there was a fairy godmother in the original.
• 17:56
  SPEAKER_00: I nearly said Lying the Witch of the Wardrobe then, but that's something completely different.
• 18:02
  SPEAKER_00: Is there a fairy godmother?
• 18:05
  SPEAKER_00: In wicked.
• 18:08
  SPEAKER_00: Are you using AI or are you googling?
• 18:10
  SPEAKER_01: I'm Googling.
• 18:11
  SPEAKER_01: Why are you Googling in this day and age?
• 18:13
  SPEAKER_01: Because I can't.
• 18:13
  SPEAKER_01: I've got obviously no uh no internet in your house, have I, so you know what I mean?
• 18:20
  SPEAKER_01: So it's it's going slow.
• 18:22
  unknown: Oh, for fuck's sake.
• 18:24
  SPEAKER_01: Right, hang on.
• 18:24
  SPEAKER_01: That's AI then.
• 18:25
  SPEAKER_01: That's AI, but I'm I'm convinced she's not a fairy godmother.
• 18:29
  SPEAKER_01: Why would she be a fairy godmother?
• 18:30
  SPEAKER_01: She's about twelve.
• 18:33
  SPEAKER_00: Ariana Grande's twelve.
• 18:35
  SPEAKER_01: In the film.
• 18:40
  SPEAKER_00: In Wicked is Ariana Grande's character what becomes the fairy godmother in the original Wizard of Oz film.
• 18:52
  SPEAKER_00: No, that was RC.
• 18:53
  SPEAKER_00: No, you've just changed your answer.
• 18:55
  SPEAKER_00: Right, no, no, no, no.
• 18:56
  SPEAKER_00: So sort of very close.
• 18:57
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, but there's an important distinction.
• 18:59
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, Paul doesn't need to know that.
• 19:00
  SPEAKER_00: No, of course.
• 19:01
  SPEAKER_00: Mariana Grande plays Glinda in Wicked.
• 19:05
  SPEAKER_00: She's essentially the younger version origin story of Glinda the Good Witch.
• 19:10
  unknown: Uh oh.
• 19:11
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 19:12
  SPEAKER_00: So it was actually a good witch, so it wasn't So she's technically not called the Fairy Godmother, although she absolutely fills that fairy godmother type role.
• 19:21
  SPEAKER_00: Well, yeah.
• 19:22
  SPEAKER_00: So I'll take that as a win.
• 19:26
  SPEAKER_01: How?
• 19:27
  SPEAKER_01: How are you gonna take the fact that she's not a fairy godmother and she's a good witch, like I said five minutes ago.
• 19:36
  SPEAKER_00: Well, because according to AI, it says basically, yeah, no we have.
• 19:39
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, because AI tells the truth a hundred percent.
• 19:42
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, it does.
• 19:43
  SPEAKER_00: Just admit it.
• 19:44
  SPEAKER_00: For once, Paul's right.
• 19:46
  SPEAKER_00: It's not often this happens, guys.
• 19:48
  SPEAKER_00: I'd say we're in the middle somewhere, you know.
• 19:50
  SPEAKER_00: As in, your right is here, my right's there, and we're around about yeah, in the middle.
• 19:54
  SPEAKER_00: There.
• 19:56
  SPEAKER_01: Um no, you're not having this one.
• 19:58
  SPEAKER_01: Alright, move on, move on.
• 19:59
  SPEAKER_01: No, we don't need to move on.
• 20:00
  SPEAKER_01: She's not a fairy godmother.
• 20:02
  SPEAKER_01: She's not a fairy godmother.
• 20:03
  SPEAKER_01: She's a witch.
• 20:04
  SPEAKER_01: She's a witch, a good witch, but she doesn't have a cat.
• 20:09
  SPEAKER_00: Is that because a cat didn't pick her?
• 20:11
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 20:12
  SPEAKER_01: Alright.
• 20:13
  SPEAKER_01: So that's how I mean obviously that's how we got on to Wicked.
• 20:16
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 20:16
  SPEAKER_01: Because I think cats are for witches, but that's just me.
• 20:19
  SPEAKER_01: What about dogs?
• 20:20
  SPEAKER_01: A dog's for wizards.
• 20:24
  SPEAKER_01: Dogs are for people who want dogs, aren't they?
• 20:26
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, right.
• 20:27
  SPEAKER_00: Well, what's the different rules for dogs?
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_01: Because I just genuinely think that's what cats are for.
• 20:34
  SPEAKER_01: Dogs are dogs are for dog people.
• 20:36
  SPEAKER_00: What about a cat that thinks it's a dog?
• 20:41
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I don't know.
• 20:42
  SPEAKER_01: Because now we're going down the old uh he, she, it's maybe on all that.
• 20:48
  SPEAKER_01: I identify as a cat.
• 20:50
  SPEAKER_01: Do you?
• 20:50
  SPEAKER_01: No.
• 20:52
  SPEAKER_01: Do you know what I mean?
• 20:53
  SPEAKER_01: But that's that's that's what that is.
• 20:54
  SPEAKER_01: That's that's what that's what that is, isn't it?
• 20:57
  SPEAKER_01: You know what I mean?
• 20:58
  SPEAKER_01: It's like wait, till I speak to your wife.
• 21:00
  SPEAKER_01: That's all right.
• 21:01
  SPEAKER_01: You've have you picked a witch.
• 21:02
  SPEAKER_01: Right?
• 21:03
  SPEAKER_01: No, she doesn't like cats.
• 21:05
  SPEAKER_01: My wife doesn't like cats.
• 21:06
  SPEAKER_01: So she doesn't like you.
• 21:08
  SPEAKER_01: She said you identi you're you No, I never said I was a cat.
• 21:11
  SPEAKER_01: Oh I'm just saying it's that road you're going down there as a cat being like a dog.
• 21:16
  SPEAKER_01: Yellow break.
• 21:17
  SPEAKER_01: Yes.
• 21:18
  SPEAKER_01: You know what I mean?
• 21:19
  SPEAKER_01: I am like the scarecrow.
• 21:23
  SPEAKER_01: Actually, that's a question.
• 21:25
  SPEAKER_01: If you were a character in a movie, who would you want to be?
• 21:30
  SPEAKER_00: Any movie.
• 21:31
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and why?
• 21:34
  SPEAKER_00: Any movie.
• 21:36
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 21:38
  SPEAKER_00: I haven't I haven't thought about this recently, but the fact you've thought about it as well.
• 21:45
  SPEAKER_00: Oh come on, as kids you've thought, oh god, yeah, he's great, he's great.
• 21:49
  SPEAKER_00: There was a martial artist called Michael Dudakoff, yes, who was in the American Ninja films, and I was well into martial arts and all that.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_00: Sort of stuff.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_00: I could even do that.
• 22:02
  SPEAKER_00: Get out of gone.
• 22:06
  SPEAKER_00: He did that sort of thing when he was sort of like sitting across the side.
• 22:09
  SPEAKER_00: So yeah, his character.
• 22:11
  SPEAKER_00: Go on.
• 22:12
  SPEAKER_00: Please tell me that yours isn't Chuck Norris.
• 22:14
  SPEAKER_00: No.
• 22:15
  SPEAKER_00: No.
• 22:15
  SPEAKER_00: Go on.
• 22:19
  SPEAKER_01: Oh no.
• 22:20
  SPEAKER_01: Stephen Seagal.
• 22:22
  SPEAKER_01: Why?
• 22:23
  SPEAKER_01: Why are you saying oh no?
• 22:25
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not saying he's a good actor.
• 22:28
  SPEAKER_00: Well no, I'd say he is, because I don't think he knows Marshall Watts very well.
• 22:32
  SPEAKER_00: Oh yeah, he does.
• 22:36
  SPEAKER_00: He's a big guy.
• 22:37
  SPEAKER_00: But have you seen him recently?
• 22:39
  SPEAKER_01: He's a big guy.
• 22:40
  SPEAKER_01: I mean he doesn't live round the corner from me, you know what I mean?
• 22:44
  SPEAKER_00: I I used yeah, I used to think that that stuff was really good and and using using the momentum against them and all that sort of stuff.
• 22:51
  SPEAKER_00: I used to think that was pretty cool.
• 22:52
  SPEAKER_00: And and and in his day, Under Siege and a few of the others, I think that's the only one I can remember.
• 22:57
  SPEAKER_00: Is that the one on the train?
• 22:58
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, so that's Under Siege 2 on the train?
• 23:01
  SPEAKER_00: Under Siege is the chef.
• 23:03
  SPEAKER_00: On the boat?
• 23:03
  SPEAKER_00: On the boat.
• 23:04
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and the cake episode.
• 23:06
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, the cake with um with the one that was in Baylor.
• 23:09
  SPEAKER_01: Baywatch.
• 23:11
  unknown: Weird.
• 23:12
  SPEAKER_00: We can both fucking remember that.
• 23:13
  SPEAKER_01: Well, you know, I'm I'm about what 15 when that comes out, so you've got to be looking that up.
• 23:18
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 23:18
  SPEAKER_01: You know what I mean?
• 23:19
  SPEAKER_01: So um But yeah, Steven Seagal.
• 23:21
  SPEAKER_01: In in his day, in his day.
• 23:23
  SPEAKER_01: But I mean, as an actor, Steven Seagal, I I I quite like him.
• 23:29
  SPEAKER_01: As a character, which is the original question.
• 23:33
  SPEAKER_01: What character would you want to be?
• 23:35
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, okay, okay.
• 23:37
  SPEAKER_00: Well, I I would want to be the American American ninja.
• 23:41
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 23:41
  SPEAKER_00: Who could almost teach ninjas to how to get the house?
• 23:45
  SPEAKER_01: Everybody and all the characters in the world.
• 23:49
  SPEAKER_01: You just want to be the American ninja.
• 23:50
  SPEAKER_00: Well yeah, because that because that's a skill and it's and it's cool, and it's not like it's not like stupid make-believe Oh, I'd be thawed, you know.
• 24:01
  SPEAKER_00: Fucking hammer, because that's fucking sensible, isn't it?
• 24:06
  SPEAKER_00: So you'd be Stephen Segalo.
• 24:07
  SPEAKER_00: So hang on a minute, you said you'd be Steven Segallo, did you?
• 24:09
  SPEAKER_01: No, not as a character.
• 24:10
  SPEAKER_01: I I like Steven Segallo's.
• 24:12
  SPEAKER_01: I thought we were just going down the martial art route.
• 24:14
  SPEAKER_01: You know what I mean?
• 24:15
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, right, okay.
• 24:16
  SPEAKER_01: And I like I I like the fact that he uses the momentum against them.
• 24:19
  SPEAKER_01: You know what I mean?
• 24:20
  SPEAKER_01: Very spiritual.
• 24:21
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm a spiritual guy.
• 24:23
  SPEAKER_01: Not a religious guy, I'm a spiritual guy.
• 24:25
  SPEAKER_01: And he he comes across as a spiritual guy.
• 24:28
  SPEAKER_00: So so so turning the question on you that who who would be who would be your character?
• 24:33
  SPEAKER_00: I think Murdoch.
• 24:37
  SPEAKER_00: Mad Murdoch out of the original A team.
• 24:40
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 24:40
  SPEAKER_00: Not the new one.
• 24:41
  SPEAKER_01: No.
• 24:42
  SPEAKER_00: Not the South African.
• 24:43
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, because we're both stupid to be fair.
• 24:46
  SPEAKER_01: But clever in our own way.
• 24:48
  SPEAKER_01: But yeah, he was a little bit eccentric and I would say that was that was that was me.
• 24:54
  SPEAKER_01: Mad Murdoch.
• 24:55
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 24:55
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 24:56
  SPEAKER_01: But I wouldn't call him Mad Murdoch.
• 24:57
  SPEAKER_01: They called him Mad Murdoch.
• 24:58
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, Murdoch always saved the day though.
• 25:00
  SPEAKER_01: In his own way.
• 25:03
  SPEAKER_01: He was like the hidden, hidden piece.
• 25:05
  SPEAKER_00: Were you gonna say hidden gem then?
• 25:07
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 25:07
  SPEAKER_00: Did you like him?
• 25:07
  SPEAKER_00: Did you have a little bit of a boy crush on him?
• 25:09
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't, no.
• 25:10
  SPEAKER_01: No.
• 25:11
  SPEAKER_01: Um but he was in Star Trek as well, in Star Trek.
• 25:15
  SPEAKER_01: Next generation.
• 25:16
  SPEAKER_01: He he he was.
• 25:18
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not a big Treky fan, to be fair.
• 25:20
  SPEAKER_01: Uh after the first Star Wars.
• 25:22
  SPEAKER_01: No, it's not the same.
• 25:23
  SPEAKER_00: I like Star Wars.
• 25:24
  SPEAKER_00: But I did get into Star Trek when I um I I when I had my first job, it was it was this crappy little place.
• 25:33
  SPEAKER_00: It was like this this guy had converted, he was like a developer, I was a programmer and programmer sitting back offices and shit.
• 25:39
  SPEAKER_00: He'd quite a rich guy, but he'd he'd converted like these stables into like little offices.
• 25:45
  SPEAKER_00: Um and uh he was obsessed with Star Trek.
• 25:49
  SPEAKER_00: And that bear in mind, this is well before we had things like Really Decent Sky and stuff.
• 25:54
  SPEAKER_00: He had this huge fucking dish in his garden that he used to position and this massive projector box, yeah, massive projector box in a little cinema room.
• 26:04
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
• 26:05
  SPEAKER_00: Every five o'clock.
• 26:06
  SPEAKER_00: In fact, I think it was about 4:45.
• 26:09
  SPEAKER_00: Work would stop, and that's it.
• 26:10
  SPEAKER_00: We'd the the three, four of us would actually go into the cinema room and watch an episode of Star Trek Next Generation.
• 26:16
  SPEAKER_00: At that time, I mean, bear in mind that was 1994.
• 26:19
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 26:20
  SPEAKER_01: So anyway, one of my reasons one of my best mates growing up was a proper Trekkie.
• 26:29
  SPEAKER_01: He had them all on VHS.
• 26:31
  SPEAKER_01: That's how far we're going back.
• 26:33
  SPEAKER_01: And you go around to his house and you could guarantee pretty much Star Trek was on.
• 26:37
  SPEAKER_01: And he he he collected he just collect them, maybe in the video shops, video spin, or blockbusters pop by in the mall canal, you know.
• 26:45
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, and he just had shelves and shelves.
• 26:47
  SPEAKER_01: And I always wondered what happened to his trekkie uh collection.
• 26:51
  SPEAKER_01: You know what I mean?
• 26:52
  SPEAKER_01: He's not with us anymore, unfortunately.
• 26:54
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, but uh, you know, that's that's life, innit?
• 26:57
  SPEAKER_01: That's a shame.
• 26:58
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, it's been beamed up.
• 27:00
  SPEAKER_01: Pretty much, yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 27:02
  SPEAKER_01: I I think that's probably no, it's fine, mate.
• 27:04
  SPEAKER_01: It's fine, you know.
• 27:05
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I think he has.
• 27:06
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and he'd love that.
• 27:08
  SPEAKER_01: But there is a little story to tell you about him.
• 27:11
  SPEAKER_01: Go on.
• 27:13
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe I shouldn't, actually.
• 27:14
  SPEAKER_00: Oh no, maybe you should.
• 27:16
  SPEAKER_00: If you think it's a story you shouldn't tell, you absolutely fucking should.
• 27:18
  SPEAKER_00: I know, but you're not using any names, you're not you're not outing him for anything.
• 27:24
  SPEAKER_00: No, but he's not watching.
• 27:26
  SPEAKER_00: No no, no, but the story.
• 27:29
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, so he used to phone me up quite often in the middle of the night, right?
• 27:36
  SPEAKER_01: Because we had what you wearing.
• 27:39
  SPEAKER_01: No, but it wasn't like that.
• 27:41
  SPEAKER_01: So he he'd have his like girlfriend round and stuff like that, but he still lived at home.
• 27:49
  SPEAKER_01: So in the middle of the night.
• 27:50
  SPEAKER_01: This was when we were about 17.
• 27:52
  SPEAKER_00: Living with his parents.
• 27:54
  SPEAKER_00: Girlfriend round.
• 27:55
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 27:56
  SPEAKER_00: Middle of the night.
• 27:57
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 27:58
  SPEAKER_00: A phoney mate Paul.
• 27:59
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 28:02
  unknown: Yeah.
• 28:03
  SPEAKER_01: It's not working.
• 28:04
  SPEAKER_01: He had this how stuff.
• 28:05
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, no, well, it was more I've finished.
• 28:13
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, just had a great session, that sort of thing.
• 28:16
  SPEAKER_01: Prag in rights, really, you know what I mean.
• 28:18
  SPEAKER_01: But anyway.
• 28:20
  SPEAKER_01: He was telling me this one time, like, that he's been with his girlfriend or that girlfriend at the time.
• 28:29
  SPEAKER_01: Been with her.
• 28:30
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, on the old sofa and stuff, you know what I mean.
• 28:32
  SPEAKER_01: Mum and dad are upstairs, and he's uh doing the deal on the on the thing without going into too many details.
• 28:42
  SPEAKER_01: But then lady problems have happened.
• 28:46
  SPEAKER_01: Oh.
• 28:47
  SPEAKER_01: So we thought, what am I gonna do here?
• 28:49
  SPEAKER_01: So he's had to leg it upstairs because he only had a bathroom upstairs.
• 28:52
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 28:55
  SPEAKER_01: So he's legged it upstairs, Bollico, to go and get some tidy up material because he's on the sofa.
• 29:03
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 29:03
  SPEAKER_01: Is is this is it wipable sofa or no, it's a cloth sofa.
• 29:09
  SPEAKER_01: That could be.
• 29:10
  SPEAKER_01: And I all I'm thinking at this time is I've sat on that sofa.
• 29:14
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, since?
• 29:15
  SPEAKER_01: No.
• 29:16
  SPEAKER_01: Previous, but what's happened beforehand.
• 29:18
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, okay.
• 29:18
  SPEAKER_01: Do you know what I'm saying?
• 29:19
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, never never look for coins down the edge.
• 29:22
  SPEAKER_01: No.
• 29:23
  SPEAKER_01: But he's shot upstairs.
• 29:26
  SPEAKER_01: His mum's at the top of the stairs.
• 29:29
  SPEAKER_01: And he's naked.
• 29:31
  SPEAKER_01: Um semi-naked, as in the bottom half's off.
• 29:36
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, not the top.
• 29:37
  SPEAKER_01: So the old Linford lunch box is side to side as he's running up the stairs, and his mum's quite a religious lady.
• 29:45
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 29:47
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, so needless to say, she was quite shocked.
• 29:51
  SPEAKER_01: But didn't realise, because it was dark, she didn't realise it was him.
• 30:00
  SPEAKER_01: No, no, hang on.
• 30:02
  SPEAKER_01: She thought it was a burglar.
• 30:04
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, right.
• 30:05
  SPEAKER_01: Running up the stairs.
• 30:06
  SPEAKER_01: You're gonna say she thought it was her husband, and so.
• 30:09
  SPEAKER_01: No, no, no, no, no.
• 30:10
  SPEAKER_01: She's shouting her husband all over the place.
• 30:13
  SPEAKER_01: His sister's still living at home.
• 30:16
  SPEAKER_01: So everybody's come flying out of bedrooms, and he's in the middle of the stairs, lunchbox langing.
• 30:23
  SPEAKER_01: The light goes on.
• 30:26
  SPEAKER_01: His girlfriend, who was only his girlfriend for that particular evening, she's give it toes, she's gone.
• 30:33
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, she's gone.
• 30:34
  SPEAKER_01: Oh yeah, yeah.
• 30:35
  SPEAKER_01: She's felt ashamed anyway because the the issues.
• 30:38
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, she's legged it out the door.
• 30:40
  SPEAKER_01: She's gone.
• 30:42
  SPEAKER_01: So he's just basically stood there, kept nowhere to be seen, t-shirt on, everything's off, and he's like.
• 30:50
  SPEAKER_01: So he phoned me up.
• 30:52
  SPEAKER_00: So he phoned what stood there with everybody's gonna be.
• 30:55
  SPEAKER_01: No, obviously, after everyone had calmed down screaming and stuff like that, thinking we're being burgled and stuff.
• 31:02
  SPEAKER_01: He's phoned me up in like, I think I've got to move out.
• 31:06
  SPEAKER_01: Cause everybody's seen me junk, like.
• 31:09
  SPEAKER_01: Do you know what I mean?
• 31:10
  SPEAKER_01: Even my mum seen it and stuff like that.
• 31:13
  SPEAKER_01: Anyway, so I've gone round the next day, thought, well, I'll have to have a bit of a laugh with this, you know, what you do.
• 31:19
  SPEAKER_01: And uh straight away said seeing his mum.
• 31:22
  SPEAKER_01: Anything happened last night?
• 31:23
  SPEAKER_01: She was like, no, no, no, just oblivious to it.
• 31:27
  SPEAKER_01: Walked into the front room.
• 31:28
  SPEAKER_01: I said, I'm not sitting on that couch, I'll sit on the chair.
• 31:31
  SPEAKER_01: His dad's there.
• 31:33
  SPEAKER_01: He'd got a Star Trek on, as usual.
• 31:35
  SPEAKER_01: So I sat there watching the Star Trek, and his dad's there, and he went, Oh, I'm so proud of him, you know.
• 31:42
  SPEAKER_01: He's like, Oh, I've developed him well.
• 31:46
  SPEAKER_01: Sat there like, what the fuck?
• 31:48
  SPEAKER_00: So that's the standard you've got to aspire to that.
• 31:51
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, you've got to be the Linford lunch box halfway up the stairs, like in a burglar.
• 31:56
  SPEAKER_00: You you need to have pick better friends.
• 32:00
  SPEAKER_01: No, he was a good mate.
• 32:02
  SPEAKER_01: You know what I mean?
• 32:02
  SPEAKER_01: Um, you never did that in your house.
• 32:04
  SPEAKER_01: Not that I know of.
• 32:07
  SPEAKER_01: You know what I mean?
• 32:08
  SPEAKER_01: But I suppose if you're gonna get caught.
• 32:12
  SPEAKER_01: You may as well get you may as well go all out, but you may as well go balls out if you if you're gonna get caught.
• 32:17
  SPEAKER_01: So, yeah, so that was uh that was um it became a constant joke then.
• 32:22
  SPEAKER_01: Get the lymphoodout.
• 32:23
  SPEAKER_01: Every time you watched Star Trek.
• 32:24
  SPEAKER_01: Well, just in general that just wasn't an excuse.
• 32:27
  SPEAKER_01: Just just in gener just in general, and I don't know how I've got onto that story from Star Trek, to be honest, but that's actually quite scary, to be fair.
• 32:34
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 32:35
  SPEAKER_01: But another little story of him as well was he had a mini.
• 32:40
  SPEAKER_01: Now he's the same size as us.
• 32:41
  SPEAKER_01: He's a big he was a big guy.
• 32:43
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 32:43
  SPEAKER_01: But he had a mini.
• 32:45
  SPEAKER_01: So we bought this mini, and he bought it, you know, back in the day you get your first car and stuff like that, and you've got a little mini and you're cruising around, you're thinking you're all right, you get the the crappy radio in there.
• 32:55
  SPEAKER_01: So you so you so you upgrade the radio.
• 33:00
  SPEAKER_00: No, no, no.
• 33:01
  SPEAKER_01: If I had replaced it.
• 33:02
  SPEAKER_01: No, no, because you get one of them pull-out ones, don't you?
• 33:04
  SPEAKER_01: Remember that you remember them?
• 33:05
  SPEAKER_01: Oh yeah.
• 33:06
  SPEAKER_01: Used to pull them out.
• 33:08
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 33:08
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 33:09
  SPEAKER_01: So this this particular day, he didn't pull his radio out.
• 33:13
  SPEAKER_01: He just bought it, left it there, his car was parked outside at the back of his house, and he'd left his radio in.
• 33:20
  SPEAKER_01: He'd only nipped in for a well, who knows for what?
• 33:23
  SPEAKER_01: You know what I mean?
• 33:24
  SPEAKER_01: But anyway, he nipped in.
• 33:26
  SPEAKER_01: When he came out, his radio'd be robbed.
• 33:29
  SPEAKER_01: You know what I mean?
• 33:29
  SPEAKER_01: He'd only been in there for about an hour.
• 33:31
  SPEAKER_01: Not not the car, not just the radio better than the car.
• 33:35
  SPEAKER_01: I'm gone.
• 33:36
  SPEAKER_01: I've got another uh it gets better because he he was fuming, you know what I mean.
• 33:42
  SPEAKER_01: And we had cordless phones, if you remember the aerial Joey Boswell's phone.
• 33:46
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, yeah, yeah, no, yeah.
• 33:47
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
• 33:48
  SPEAKER_01: So we have one of them, so he phones me up.
• 33:49
  SPEAKER_01: Fucking radio's been robbed and all.
• 33:51
  SPEAKER_01: I said, Oh, never mind, put your old one back in.
• 33:53
  SPEAKER_01: At least you've got some tunes.
• 33:54
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah, I'll do that.
• 33:56
  SPEAKER_00: At least you've got some shoes.
• 34:00
  SPEAKER_01: I've got some tunes.
• 34:01
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, because we're you know, we're going out, so he's picking me up.
• 34:05
  SPEAKER_01: Just put your old one in, take five minutes.
• 34:07
  SPEAKER_01: So he puts his old radio back in.
• 34:09
  SPEAKER_01: That night, his car gets robbed, and they've took the radio out and left the radio on his drive.
• 34:18
  SPEAKER_00: Because it's the same people, yeah.
• 34:20
  SPEAKER_00: They probably nick the radio and then thought, actually, we'll have a car to go with it.
• 34:24
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, look, most car criminals will probably nick a car, and but they've come back to you.
• 34:28
  SPEAKER_01: Imagine that though, you've woke up the next morning, you've gone out to your car, and all this about radio, the the you know, the eight track or whatever it was, just there on the path.
• 34:39
  SPEAKER_01: That's just brilliant, brilliant, honestly.
• 34:42
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, there's plenty of stories about him to be fair.