Latest / Get Real Rae... Real Business & Life Advice / Why it's Time to Declutter Your Home, Your Business, and Your Life

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Why it's Time to Declutter Your Home, Your Business, and Your Life · Get Real Rae... Real Business & Life Advice

• 0:00
  Speaker: Hello, this is Rae with Get Real Rae,
• 0:03
  Speaker: a place and space for life and business
• 0:05
  Speaker: tips to happily inspire you on your journey
• 0:09
  Speaker: or at the very least provide you with
• 0:12
  Speaker: some laughs.
• 0:15
  Speaker: So yeah, let's get real.
• 0:19
  Speaker: Craving real advice?
• 0:21
  Speaker: Tired of feeling like every other small business
• 0:23
  Speaker: owner or solopreneur is raking in the dough
• 0:26
  Speaker: while you just seem to be raking, secretly
• 0:29
  Speaker: looking for a reminder that starting your own
• 0:31
  Speaker: business is not as glamorous as others make
• 0:34
  Speaker: it look?
• 0:35
  Speaker: Whether you're looking to change the game in
• 0:37
  Speaker: your relationships at home or at the workplace,
• 0:40
  Speaker: you've come to the right place.
• 0:42
  Speaker: My name is Rae.
• 0:43
  Speaker: I went from corporate America to running my
• 0:45
  Speaker: own small business to becoming a solopreneur.
• 0:47
  Speaker: I'm a professional actor and dare we say
• 0:50
  Speaker: a professional busybody because this body is about
• 0:54
  Speaker: to be busy all up in your biz.
• 0:55
  Speaker: So let's get real.
• 1:00
  Speaker: Okay, so yes, I've spent a lot of
• 1:03
  Speaker: time working with children and I used to
• 1:06
  Speaker: work in preschools, going in, doing some yoga
• 1:09
  Speaker: with them or dance lessons with them.
• 1:11
  Speaker: I think I was just actually like an
• 1:13
  Speaker: assistant in a daycare center with some sort
• 1:18
  Speaker: of assistant role in some sort of daycare
• 1:20
  Speaker: center.
• 1:21
  Speaker: And yeah, the cleanup song, it's a fun
• 1:24
  Speaker: song.
• 1:24
  Speaker: It's a fun song.
• 1:26
  Speaker: Just sing it when you are cleaning your
• 1:30
  Speaker: home.
• 1:31
  Speaker: Do you clean your home?
• 1:32
  Speaker: Okay, let's roll this back.
• 1:34
  Speaker: Do you clean your home?
• 1:35
  Speaker: Like when you get out of bed, let's
• 1:39
  Speaker: roll it back even further.
• 1:41
  Speaker: Do y'all bed sheets smell like you?
• 1:46
  Speaker: Just saying.
• 1:47
  Speaker: When was the last time you washed your
• 1:49
  Speaker: sheets for your comfort?
• 1:51
  Speaker: When was the last time you washed for
• 1:52
  Speaker: bedding?
• 1:53
  Speaker: I saw this YouTube video where this woman
• 1:55
  Speaker: who's in Sweden was talking about how there's
• 2:01
  Speaker: some sort of duvet that you have touch
• 2:06
  Speaker: your body, but it's not the same duvet
• 2:08
  Speaker: as the top of bed.
• 2:11
  Speaker: Like you would never touch that.
• 2:13
  Speaker: That would just be gross.
• 2:14
  Speaker: And I thought that's weird.
• 2:17
  Speaker: So I mean, in the U.S. we
• 2:20
  Speaker: have the sheet and then you might have
• 2:23
  Speaker: another blanket and then you've got your duvet
• 2:26
  Speaker: or comforter right on top of that.
• 2:30
  Speaker: My body touches the top thing.
• 2:33
  Speaker: It does.
• 2:34
  Speaker: I know I'm supposed to stay under the
• 2:35
  Speaker: sheet.
• 2:35
  Speaker: Maybe I just sleep like a wild woman.
• 2:37
  Speaker: Okay, I just sleep like a wild woman.
• 2:39
  Speaker: And things do kind of get all messy.
• 2:41
  Speaker: But I don't know.
• 2:43
  Speaker: It just seemed like an extra layer that
• 2:45
  Speaker: I'd never known of and thought about.
• 2:46
  Speaker: And it just seemed crazy wackadoodle to me.
• 2:49
  Speaker: Well, not necessarily crazy, but I thought, oh,
• 2:50
  Speaker: maybe I should try that.
• 2:51
  Speaker: But as I'm thinking about it, I should
• 2:53
  Speaker: probably just stop sleeping like a wild woman.
• 2:56
  Speaker: And then I don't have to worry about
• 2:58
  Speaker: the top bedding getting not so fresh anymore.
• 3:03
  Speaker: And then having to wash it.
• 3:05
  Speaker: I really hate having to wash comforters, you
• 3:08
  Speaker: guys, and duvets.
• 3:09
  Speaker: Like I hate it because they're big and
• 3:13
  Speaker: you've got to fight to get in the
• 3:15
  Speaker: washer.
• 3:16
  Speaker: And I know what you're saying.
• 3:17
  Speaker: You're like, well, Rae, I actually do not
• 3:19
  Speaker: do my laundry.
• 3:20
  Speaker: I have someone pick it up for me.
• 3:22
  Speaker: Or Rae, I don't have to worry about
• 3:24
  Speaker: that.
• 3:24
  Speaker: My maid does it for me.
• 3:25
  Speaker: Or Rae, I got a bucket in the
• 3:27
  Speaker: back and I just take the hose and,
• 3:29
  Speaker: you know, I just go at it and
• 3:30
  Speaker: it's good.
• 3:32
  Speaker: And so I should try all those methods
• 3:35
  Speaker: and more.
• 3:36
  Speaker: But since I don't have a maid or
• 3:40
  Speaker: someone to come and pick up my laundry
• 3:41
  Speaker: for me, actually, I don't mind doing the
• 3:44
  Speaker: laundry.
• 3:44
  Speaker: I have no problem with it.
• 3:46
  Speaker: My ex would always be like, I just
• 3:50
  Speaker: want to drop it off.
• 3:51
  Speaker: I'm like, that's just kind of, for me,
• 3:53
  Speaker: I just feel like a waste of money.
• 3:55
  Speaker: Like, are you really doing something else with
• 3:56
  Speaker: your time?
• 3:57
  Speaker: Because honestly, if you just take the clothes
• 3:59
  Speaker: and stick it in the wash and hit
• 4:01
  Speaker: start, that took you, what, five minutes?
• 4:07
  Speaker: So I, this morning, I found myself, I
• 4:14
  Speaker: found a sock.
• 4:15
  Speaker: I was going to say I found myself
• 4:18
  Speaker: sniffing the sheets.
• 4:19
  Speaker: And then I realized, well, actually it all
• 4:20
  Speaker: started with a sock.
• 4:22
  Speaker: I, there's a piece of paper on the
• 4:24
  Speaker: floor.
• 4:24
  Speaker: So I picked up the piece of paper
• 4:25
  Speaker: that was on the floor.
• 4:26
  Speaker: So I was like, oh, why is this
• 4:27
  Speaker: piece of paper on the floor?
• 4:28
  Speaker: It must have slipped out of my book.
• 4:29
  Speaker: That's my bookmark.
• 4:29
  Speaker: I will just pick this up.
• 4:31
  Speaker: Oh, there's a sock under the bed.
• 4:33
  Speaker: How did that get there?
• 4:35
  Speaker: Oh, okay.
• 4:35
  Speaker: I guess, I guess I took my socks
• 4:38
  Speaker: off in here.
• 4:39
  Speaker: I'm going to take that sock and I'm
• 4:40
  Speaker: going to go ahead and put that in
• 4:42
  Speaker: the laundry basket.
• 4:43
  Speaker: And okay, I'll make up my bed today.
• 4:46
  Speaker: I've been a little slacking on that.
• 4:48
  Speaker: Let's make up the bed.
• 4:49
  Speaker: Oh, is there another sock in the bed?
• 4:53
  Speaker: How many socks are missing?
• 4:55
  Speaker: And so I pulled apart all the bedclothes
• 4:57
  Speaker: and I find another sock.
• 4:59
  Speaker: Okay.
• 4:59
  Speaker: Clearly I'm somebody who likes to sleep with
• 5:01
  Speaker: socks on.
• 5:02
  Speaker: I like my feet to be warm at
• 5:04
  Speaker: night.
• 5:05
  Speaker: I do.
• 5:06
  Speaker: It's just a me thing.
• 5:07
  Speaker: Do you sleep with socks on?
• 5:09
  Speaker: I'm going to know in the comments below.
• 5:12
  Speaker: And so then I was like, maybe since
• 5:14
  Speaker: I've ripped apart all these bedclothes, I should
• 5:16
  Speaker: just go ahead and wash the sheet.
• 5:18
  Speaker: And is it time to wash the comforters?
• 5:19
  Speaker: How long ago did I wash them?
• 5:21
  Speaker: It wasn't that long ago, but do they
• 5:23
  Speaker: smell like me?
• 5:24
  Speaker: Have I been sweating recently?
• 5:26
  Speaker: Let's give it the old sniff test.
• 5:28
  Speaker: And so then I was just like, oh
• 5:29
  Speaker: man, I gotta do laundry today.
• 5:32
  Speaker: After all that, I took a look around
• 5:35
  Speaker: the house.
• 5:36
  Speaker: Wait a minute.
• 5:37
  Speaker: I thought I was a minimalist.
• 5:40
  Speaker: Okay.
• 5:40
  Speaker: I claimed minimalism before it was like a
• 5:42
  Speaker: trendy thing.
• 5:44
  Speaker: Now, I also, I got a lot of
• 5:45
  Speaker: things I claimed in life before they were
• 5:47
  Speaker: trendy, but for me, it's kind of like,
• 5:52
  Speaker: don't have a lot of stuff because if
• 5:56
  Speaker: you're not using it, someone else could probably
• 5:59
  Speaker: use it.
• 5:59
  Speaker: And it's just more things to worry about.
• 6:01
  Speaker: It's more things you can't find.
• 6:04
  Speaker: And for years I would, I moved a
• 6:08
  Speaker: lot.
• 6:09
  Speaker: So I would take my belongings, pack them
• 6:12
  Speaker: up.
• 6:13
  Speaker: And then towards the end, when we're getting
• 6:15
  Speaker: closer to that move date or the day
• 6:17
  Speaker: of the move, I'm just like, there's just
• 6:18
  Speaker: this stuff that I just don't even know.
• 6:21
  Speaker: I don't have time to sort it, just
• 6:22
  Speaker: stick it in a box.
• 6:24
  Speaker: And so I would always have a box
• 6:26
  Speaker: of stuff or a drawer full of stuff.
• 6:28
  Speaker: There was always this kind of stuff section.
• 6:32
  Speaker: And finally, I reached a point where I
• 6:34
  Speaker: was like, I can't stand it anymore.
• 6:36
  Speaker: You know, that tired of always coming up
• 6:39
  Speaker: with a box of stuff.
• 6:41
  Speaker: And I managed to kind of get rid
• 6:43
  Speaker: of everything.
• 6:43
  Speaker: I learned the concept that everything should have
• 6:46
  Speaker: a home, everything should have a place.
• 6:48
  Speaker: It hadn't occurred to me before.
• 6:50
  Speaker: And especially when you're someone who, if you've
• 6:52
  Speaker: grown up like sharing a room with a
• 6:53
  Speaker: sibling or living in a household where maybe
• 6:59
  Speaker: there's limited space, there's more stuff and people
• 7:03
  Speaker: than there is space, then this idea that
• 7:05
  Speaker: everything should have a home is going to
• 7:07
  Speaker: be really foreign, right?
• 7:08
  Speaker: It's like, how can everything have a home?
• 7:10
  Speaker: That sounds expensive.
• 7:11
  Speaker: But when one chooses to have less stuff,
• 7:15
  Speaker: then it becomes easier to make sure that
• 7:16
  Speaker: everything has a home.
• 7:18
  Speaker: And so by just taking the emotion out
• 7:21
  Speaker: of being like, you know what?
• 7:22
  Speaker: I haven't even thought about this item in
• 7:25
  Speaker: a year.
• 7:27
  Speaker: I've lived here a year.
• 7:28
  Speaker: I haven't thought about it.
• 7:29
  Speaker: I was keeping it just in case.
• 7:31
  Speaker: But honestly, just in case it hasn't arrived
• 7:34
  Speaker: a year, it's probably never going to arrive.
• 7:35
  Speaker: Just get rid of it.
• 7:36
  Speaker: Let someone else enjoy it.
• 7:38
  Speaker: Let someone else bring life to it or
• 7:39
  Speaker: get rid of it.
• 7:40
  Speaker: Just make it garbage, right?
• 7:43
  Speaker: And so I have really prided myself on
• 7:50
  Speaker: not having a lot of stuff and on
• 7:52
  Speaker: being a clean person.
• 7:54
  Speaker: Now, love my mom dearly.
• 7:58
  Speaker: She is a stuffed person.
• 8:00
  Speaker: She's also moved a lot, but she has
• 8:02
  Speaker: a lot of stuff.
• 8:04
  Speaker: And if it's a holiday and wants to
• 8:08
  Speaker: feel festive, she's got the stuff for that
• 8:11
  Speaker: holiday.
• 8:11
  Speaker: I just think that's so great.
• 8:13
  Speaker: A part of me is always like, oh,
• 8:14
  Speaker: I wish I was that person.
• 8:15
  Speaker: And when I worked in schools, I would
• 8:17
  Speaker: like to bring things to decorate the classroom.
• 8:20
  Speaker: It's going to be Valentine's Day this week.
• 8:22
  Speaker: Let's decorate the classroom with hearts and Halloween.
• 8:24
  Speaker: I've got a creepy spider.
• 8:26
  Speaker: And so I started to accumulate stuff again
• 8:29
  Speaker: for my work.
• 8:30
  Speaker: Oh, you know what?
• 8:31
  Speaker: We're going to have to shoot this.
• 8:33
  Speaker: And so it would really be helpful if
• 8:35
  Speaker: I had a portable light and a cage
• 8:39
  Speaker: and a mic so that when we're shooting
• 8:41
  Speaker: outdoors, I can go ahead and do these
• 8:43
  Speaker: things.
• 8:44
  Speaker: And I'm not like fighting with the phone
• 8:46
  Speaker: falling over or fighting with trying to figure
• 8:49
  Speaker: out lighting or fighting with microphones because I've
• 8:52
  Speaker: got this thing.
• 8:54
  Speaker: And so the stuff just starts to build.
• 8:58
  Speaker: So I got rid of a whole bunch
• 8:59
  Speaker: of stuff.
• 9:00
  Speaker: And then over time, things just start to
• 9:01
  Speaker: build.
• 9:02
  Speaker: And so I'm looking around my home.
• 9:05
  Speaker: I'm going, why does this look like a
• 9:08
  Speaker: tornado just came here?
• 9:10
  Speaker: Like, if someone stopped by right now, would
• 9:12
  Speaker: I be proud of my space?
• 9:15
  Speaker: Or would I be like, oh, my goodness,
• 9:17
  Speaker: this looks disastrous.
• 9:19
  Speaker: Please excuse the stuff.
• 9:21
  Speaker: Please ignore the stuff.
• 9:23
  Speaker: I didn't expect anybody to come over.
• 9:25
  Speaker: And so I was like, okay, girl, put
• 9:27
  Speaker: away the laundry.
• 9:28
  Speaker: You have put it away, put it away.
• 9:30
  Speaker: It normally doesn't take you this long to
• 9:31
  Speaker: put away the laundry.
• 9:32
  Speaker: And go ahead, finish washing the dishes, put
• 9:35
  Speaker: away the dishes.
• 9:36
  Speaker: Go ahead.
• 9:37
  Speaker: What's with these receipts over here?
• 9:38
  Speaker: You were going to take a phone, get
• 9:39
  Speaker: this done.
• 9:40
  Speaker: Let's start decluttering.
• 9:43
  Speaker: And there wasn't a whole lot to declutter.
• 9:46
  Speaker: Because like I said, I got rid of
• 9:48
  Speaker: a bunch of stuff.
• 9:49
  Speaker: So it was just this other trip getting
• 9:50
  Speaker: rid of stuff.
• 9:51
  Speaker: But that was the surface level.
• 9:53
  Speaker: Then I start to go, what's in this
• 9:57
  Speaker: drawer?
• 9:58
  Speaker: I'm looking for X.
• 9:59
  Speaker: But what else is in this drawer?
• 10:00
  Speaker: And I look in the drawer and I
• 10:01
  Speaker: go, I remember really, really feeling like I
• 10:06
  Speaker: needed a karaoke microphone.
• 10:08
  Speaker: It will be fun for my business.
• 10:10
  Speaker: It will be fun for doing karaoke with
• 10:12
  Speaker: my spouse.
• 10:13
  Speaker: I want this.
• 10:15
  Speaker: And I was so excited when I got
• 10:16
  Speaker: it.
• 10:17
  Speaker: And I just refound this karaoke microphone that
• 10:20
  Speaker: I delicately put into a little box.
• 10:23
  Speaker: I have not touched this thing in a
• 10:25
  Speaker: year.
• 10:26
  Speaker: And I found myself going, do I need
• 10:28
  Speaker: this?
• 10:29
  Speaker: Or is this just stuff?
• 10:33
  Speaker: Is it something that I've held on to
• 10:36
  Speaker: thinking that I would use it now?
• 10:38
  Speaker: Do I really need it?
• 10:40
  Speaker: The other day, I was listening to this
• 10:41
  Speaker: podcast episode, where the question came up, do
• 10:45
  Speaker: you reach a point where you're too old
• 10:47
  Speaker: to use a skateboard as like a reasonable
• 10:49
  Speaker: form of transportation?
• 10:53
  Speaker: And in my mind, I'm going, yeah.
• 10:55
  Speaker: If you're freaking 50, like, yeah, I'm just
• 10:58
  Speaker: going to go ahead and skateboard to work.
• 11:02
  Speaker: Why?
• 11:04
  Speaker: If anything, at the most, ride a bike.
• 11:07
  Speaker: You and your briefcase on a skateboard.
• 11:09
  Speaker: You don't look cool.
• 11:10
  Speaker: You just look ridiculous.
• 11:11
  Speaker: Or maybe you don't have a briefcase.
• 11:14
  Speaker: Just you and your flannel shirt heading to
• 11:17
  Speaker: the bar to go work.
• 11:18
  Speaker: You look ridiculous.
• 11:19
  Speaker: I don't know what your job is, but
• 11:22
  Speaker: you on a skateboard, holding a surfboard, trying
• 11:25
  Speaker: to get to the beach because you're a
• 11:26
  Speaker: professional surfer.
• 11:27
  Speaker: You look ridiculous.
• 11:29
  Speaker: I don't know.
• 11:29
  Speaker: You should not be a grown adult on
• 11:32
  Speaker: a skateboard unless you are a professional skateboarder.
• 11:36
  Speaker: And even pro skateboarders retire at some point.
• 11:41
  Speaker: So, don't be a 60-year-old man
• 11:43
  Speaker: like, I'm going to skateboard.
• 11:44
  Speaker: Do you need a helmet?
• 11:46
  Speaker: Should I get you a helmet?
• 11:48
  Speaker: I'm just saying, there are some things.
• 11:50
  Speaker: There are some things.
• 11:52
  Speaker: And so, I think I'm going to have
• 11:57
  Speaker: to separate with this karaoke microphone.
• 11:59
  Speaker: It's super cute.
• 12:01
  Speaker: It's white and gold.
• 12:03
  Speaker: And I have to think about it because,
• 12:06
  Speaker: honestly, I haven't touched it in a year.
• 12:07
  Speaker: My life hasn't changed.
• 12:08
  Speaker: Now, I love karaoke, but I've only done
• 12:11
  Speaker: karaoke maybe twice over the past year.
• 12:16
  Speaker: Part of it is just my emotional baggage.
• 12:18
  Speaker: I used to do karaoke with my former
• 12:21
  Speaker: spouse, and it was one of the few
• 12:24
  Speaker: things we could do that we both enjoyed
• 12:27
  Speaker: that we could do together.
• 12:30
  Speaker: Not necessarily that we enjoyed doing it together,
• 12:32
  Speaker: but it was something we both enjoyed that
• 12:34
  Speaker: we could do together.
• 12:39
  Speaker: And I always loved the songs he picked.
• 12:41
  Speaker: I'm sure he didn't love the songs I
• 12:43
  Speaker: picked, but I did want to support him
• 12:45
  Speaker: in that area because I knew that singing
• 12:47
  Speaker: was something he enjoyed, and I knew he
• 12:49
  Speaker: didn't feel the most confident about it.
• 12:51
  Speaker: And I knew that singing was something that
• 12:52
  Speaker: I enjoyed, and I didn't always feel confident
• 12:54
  Speaker: about it.
• 12:54
  Speaker: And so, this karaoke was an opportunity to
• 12:58
  Speaker: feel confident.
• 13:00
  Speaker: And in my new home, on my own,
• 13:05
  Speaker: I started to feel very self-conscious about
• 13:08
  Speaker: the karaoke.
• 13:09
  Speaker: I don't know why.
• 13:10
  Speaker: I mean, okay, yes, people can hear me
• 13:14
  Speaker: sing.
• 13:14
  Speaker: Mind you, there is distance between the walls
• 13:17
  Speaker: of these homes, but sometimes I do hear
• 13:18
  Speaker: the neighbors, but I think it's because that
• 13:21
  Speaker: kid's window's open.
• 13:22
  Speaker: I don't know.
• 13:22
  Speaker: Anyway, I had a big voice.
• 13:25
  Speaker: I had a loud voice, and I liked
• 13:26
  Speaker: singing loud.
• 13:27
  Speaker: I like loud songs.
• 13:28
  Speaker: I love it.
• 13:29
  Speaker: I love it a lot.
• 13:30
  Speaker: And so, I do get a little self
• 13:32
  Speaker: -conscious, and I start to feel very alone
• 13:37
  Speaker: in this karaoke process, which is silly.
• 13:44
  Speaker: And I could go out to like a
• 13:46
  Speaker: bar, do karaoke, and I'm trying to get
• 13:50
  Speaker: myself to go do that.
• 13:52
  Speaker: I used to like to do that on
• 13:53
  Speaker: my own.
• 13:56
  Speaker: There was a lot of nerves.
• 13:58
  Speaker: I'd go to like piano bars.
• 14:00
  Speaker: A lot of nerves, right?
• 14:02
  Speaker: When I went with friends, I liked that,
• 14:04
  Speaker: but there was also this kind of, hmm,
• 14:09
  Speaker: no.
• 14:11
  Speaker: I like for karaoke to be fun and
• 14:14
  Speaker: to not be too serious.
• 14:15
  Speaker: And so, I do kind of have mixed
• 14:18
  Speaker: feelings when people take it very seriously, I
• 14:23
  Speaker: guess.
• 14:24
  Speaker: I know.
• 14:25
  Speaker: I really shouldn't.
• 14:26
  Speaker: I mean, I want to celebrate everybody who's
• 14:29
  Speaker: there to perform.
• 14:30
  Speaker: There are some songs where I'm just like,
• 14:32
  Speaker: oh, I don't really want to hear your
• 14:33
  Speaker: song.
• 14:35
  Speaker: Oh, that song, that's a little, oh, that's
• 14:37
  Speaker: a little boring, right?
• 14:38
  Speaker: I don't want to hear this.
• 14:39
  Speaker: I guess I don't love karaoke where it's
• 14:41
  Speaker: like, let's just sing ballads.
• 14:42
  Speaker: Like, no.
• 14:44
  Speaker: Let's go sing rock songs.
• 14:47
  Speaker: That old song that you used to jam
• 14:49
  Speaker: to when you were riding the bus.
• 14:51
  Speaker: That old hip-hop song.
• 14:52
  Speaker: Yeah, let's do that.
• 14:54
  Speaker: And then realize that it's actually really hard
• 14:56
  Speaker: to sing that hip-hop song.
• 14:58
  Speaker: And when you were rocking on the bus,
• 14:59
  Speaker: you weren't any good at it, so why
• 15:01
  Speaker: would you think you would be suddenly good
• 15:02
  Speaker: at it in karaoke?
• 15:04
  Speaker: And it's so cool to just be like,
• 15:05
  Speaker: oh my gosh, I didn't even know that's
• 15:07
  Speaker: what the singer actually said in this song.
• 15:08
  Speaker: Oops, I guess I got the lyrics wrong
• 15:10
  Speaker: all these years.
• 15:11
  Speaker: I love karaoke.
• 15:14
  Speaker: And yet, I am so in my head
• 15:17
  Speaker: about doing it on my own in my
• 15:18
  Speaker: home.
• 15:19
  Speaker: It's the one place I should be able
• 15:21
  Speaker: to soar.
• 15:23
  Speaker: And having this microphone was supposed to give
• 15:26
  Speaker: me an opportunity to feel confident and to
• 15:28
  Speaker: have fun and to do more.
• 15:30
  Speaker: That's why I got the stupid microphone.
• 15:32
  Speaker: So that me and my partner could feel
• 15:35
  Speaker: great like rock stars doing the karaoke thing.
• 15:39
  Speaker: And I'm looking at this device going, that
• 15:41
  Speaker: was a kid's mic.
• 15:43
  Speaker: Shouldn't I just give it away to some
• 15:47
  Speaker: kid who could use a little moment of
• 15:50
  Speaker: joy?
• 15:52
  Speaker: Shouldn't I focus on singing without a prop
• 15:57
  Speaker: in my hand, without using this external device
• 16:00
  Speaker: as motivation and to allow myself to build
• 16:08
  Speaker: the confidence in singing?
• 16:09
  Speaker: And at some point, get a professional mic
• 16:11
  Speaker: and start recording things like a professional, like
• 16:16
  Speaker: a professional.
• 16:19
  Speaker: So as I say all this, I'm like,
• 16:20
  Speaker: yeah, you need to get rid of that
• 16:21
  Speaker: mic, girl.
• 16:22
  Speaker: I usually just, I just talked about this
• 16:24
  Speaker: stuff off at the Goodwill the other day.
• 16:26
  Speaker: I usually just take stuff to a donation
• 16:28
  Speaker: center.
• 16:28
  Speaker: Sometimes I'll message neighbors, be like, hey, do
• 16:32
  Speaker: you have a need for this?
• 16:33
  Speaker: Can you use this?
• 16:35
  Speaker: This mic is in excellent working condition.
• 16:38
  Speaker: And I do feel like I want to
• 16:39
  Speaker: find it a home with someone who, with
• 16:44
  Speaker: a child who will really appreciate the opportunity
• 16:48
  Speaker: to to sing and soar and to have
• 16:51
  Speaker: that prop and to build that self-confidence.
• 16:54
  Speaker: I don't know.
• 16:56
  Speaker: I don't know where to find this child.
• 16:58
  Speaker: I was in the process of becoming a
• 17:02
  Speaker: Big Sister and I just put the application
• 17:07
  Speaker: on hold because I did not like how
• 17:10
  Speaker: I felt it was really disorganized in terms
• 17:15
  Speaker: of the onboarding process.
• 17:17
  Speaker: This is not a reflection on the Big
• 17:20
  Speaker: Brother Big Sister organization.
• 17:21
  Speaker: They were clearly very organized.
• 17:23
  Speaker: Just the chapter I was dealing with wasn't
• 17:26
  Speaker: quite doing things the way that I felt
• 17:29
  Speaker: they could be done.
• 17:31
  Speaker: And I was just you know what?
• 17:32
  Speaker: I'm turned off.
• 17:33
  Speaker: I'm turned off by this interaction.
• 17:35
  Speaker: I'm turned off, right?
• 17:39
  Speaker: And so I didn't follow through with finishing
• 17:42
  Speaker: up that process.
• 17:44
  Speaker: And there's a lot of things that I
• 17:45
  Speaker: start, I don't finish.
• 17:46
  Speaker: And that's a problem.
• 17:47
  Speaker: And I need to finish things.
• 17:49
  Speaker: I, that is, that's definitely another video.
• 17:51
  Speaker: And I may have made a video of
• 17:53
  Speaker: that.
• 17:53
  Speaker: I'll probably have to check to see.
• 17:55
  Speaker: I made a video of that.
• 17:56
  Speaker: But with that being said, oh my goodness,
• 17:59
  Speaker: this microphone was not the only thing.
• 18:02
  Speaker: There were other things that I found.
• 18:03
  Speaker: I'm like, what?
• 18:06
  Speaker: Do I use this?
• 18:07
  Speaker: Can we get rid of this?
• 18:08
  Speaker: Let's just get rid of this.
• 18:09
  Speaker: And so I've been in this kind of
• 18:10
  Speaker: decluttering thing with my home.
• 18:12
  Speaker: And part of me feels like maybe decluttering
• 18:15
  Speaker: my home is my way of avoiding decluttering
• 18:21
  Speaker: my business.
• 18:25
  Speaker: I know.
• 18:26
  Speaker: I know.
• 18:26
  Speaker: Okay.
• 18:27
  Speaker: So yes, the home was like super gross.
• 18:28
  Speaker: And I have some papers that I do
• 18:31
  Speaker: need to sort.
• 18:32
  Speaker: But there are also a lot of things
• 18:33
  Speaker: with my business that need to be decluttered
• 18:35
  Speaker: and I do need to sort.
• 18:36
  Speaker: And you know, sometimes when you can't deal
• 18:39
  Speaker: with it, my feeling is if you're not
• 18:41
  Speaker: sure in the moment and you're just back
• 18:43
  Speaker: and forth and it's just causing you a
• 18:45
  Speaker: lot of stress, anxiety or whatever, back away.
• 18:48
  Speaker: I tell this to my writing students all
• 18:49
  Speaker: the time.
• 18:50
  Speaker: Like if you reach a point where you're
• 18:51
  Speaker: just like, oh, I don't know what you're
• 18:52
  Speaker: staring at for a while.
• 18:53
  Speaker: Like, back away.
• 18:56
  Speaker: Just, just come back to that part of
• 18:58
  Speaker: the essay.
• 18:59
  Speaker: Right.
• 19:02
  Speaker: And the students who get it, who can
• 19:05
  Speaker: just accept that perfection ain't going to come
• 19:08
  Speaker: at that moment.
• 19:11
  Speaker: Their essays get so much better so fast.
• 19:15
  Speaker: And then their whole writing process improves so
• 19:18
  Speaker: fast.
• 19:19
  Speaker: And they're just, they're rocking it.
• 19:22
  Speaker: They're rocking it.
• 19:24
  Speaker: And I love to see that.
• 19:25
  Speaker: Um, you can tell I like to like
• 19:27
  Speaker: help people out, right?
• 19:29
  Speaker: I hope you can tell that from these
• 19:31
  Speaker: videos and from my mention of the kind
• 19:33
  Speaker: of big brother, big sister program.
• 19:35
  Speaker: Um, and it is on my plan to
• 19:38
  Speaker: someday adopt.
• 19:41
  Speaker: Uh, I thought of being a foster mom,
• 19:43
  Speaker: but you know, financially right now, I don't
• 19:46
  Speaker: feel like that would be smart.
• 19:48
  Speaker: I don't want to add more stress to
• 19:50
  Speaker: someone else's life.
• 19:52
  Speaker: Um, and you know, parenting does take time.
• 19:56
  Speaker: And if you're a parent, then you know,
• 19:58
  Speaker: um, apparently it does take time.
• 20:00
  Speaker: And so I want to make sure that
• 20:01
  Speaker: I can give somebody that time and energy
• 20:04
  Speaker: without, without feeling like I'm not giving them
• 20:12
  Speaker: enough without feeling like, um, I'm not being
• 20:17
  Speaker: fair.
• 20:19
  Speaker: And cause I would be a single mom,
• 20:21
  Speaker: right?
• 20:22
  Speaker: You know, when you can at least split
• 20:23
  Speaker: it with someone else, that's definitely helpful.
• 20:25
  Speaker: But, um, with that being said, um, now
• 20:30
  Speaker: is not the right time for me to,
• 20:31
  Speaker: to take that journey.
• 20:33
  Speaker: Why do I bring this up?
• 20:35
  Speaker: Because I like the idea of some of
• 20:37
  Speaker: these things that I'm just like, you gotta
• 20:39
  Speaker: let go.
• 20:40
  Speaker: Just get rid of it.
• 20:41
  Speaker: I like the idea of giving some of
• 20:43
  Speaker: these things to, um, that is it adoptee?
• 20:49
  Speaker: The person being adopted.
• 20:51
  Speaker: Um, I like the idea of being like,
• 20:53
  Speaker: Hey, I think you'd like this.
• 20:57
  Speaker: This brought me joy.
• 20:58
  Speaker: I think, I think it might bring you
• 20:59
  Speaker: joy too.
• 21:00
  Speaker: I have a number of books that I
• 21:01
  Speaker: just pulled out and I'm going to part
• 21:04
  Speaker: with.
• 21:06
  Speaker: And part of it's like, Oh, this is,
• 21:09
  Speaker: Oh, this is a classic.
• 21:10
  Speaker: I really want to make sure that a
• 21:12
  Speaker: kid gets this.
• 21:12
  Speaker: Who's going to understand the importance of this
• 21:15
  Speaker: book, but that's control.
• 21:20
  Speaker: And when we have clutter, we lose control.
• 21:26
  Speaker: You use the, lose the ability to find
• 21:29
  Speaker: things when you need them.
• 21:31
  Speaker: You always kind of have this to do
• 21:34
  Speaker: on the to-do list.
• 21:35
  Speaker: So I gotta let them go.
• 21:38
  Speaker: I did this event the other day and
• 21:41
  Speaker: I was flipping out because I designed these
• 21:46
  Speaker: postcards for the event.
• 21:48
  Speaker: And part of the agreement was I would
• 21:50
  Speaker: do this event for free and then I
• 21:51
  Speaker: would be able to market my business at
• 21:52
  Speaker: this event.
• 21:54
  Speaker: And I couldn't pick up the postcards.
• 21:59
  Speaker: They weren't going to be in time.
• 22:04
  Speaker: And the other set of postcards I had
• 22:06
  Speaker: those, I left in the car when I
• 22:13
  Speaker: was going inside and I didn't have time
• 22:15
  Speaker: to go back outside to go get them.
• 22:17
  Speaker: And so here I am at this event
• 22:19
  Speaker: and I have people who are interested in
• 22:21
  Speaker: connecting and staying in touch and finding out
• 22:22
  Speaker: more, and I've got nothing to give them.
• 22:25
  Speaker: And on the postcards, there's a QR code
• 22:27
  Speaker: that takes them to this landing page so
• 22:29
  Speaker: they can sign up to be part of
• 22:31
  Speaker: the next activity.
• 22:32
  Speaker: But I didn't have that.
• 22:33
  Speaker: So I could say was, Oh, you can
• 22:35
  Speaker: look for me online.
• 22:36
  Speaker: Just Google me and you'll find my website.
• 22:40
  Speaker: And when I got home, I went to
• 22:43
  Speaker: the website.
• 22:43
  Speaker: I said, I gotta quickly put up a
• 22:45
  Speaker: link so that people can sign up because
• 22:47
  Speaker: the website is not the same as the
• 22:50
  Speaker: landing page.
• 22:51
  Speaker: They might be confused.
• 22:53
  Speaker: And I look at the website and my
• 22:55
  Speaker: heart's breaking because I'm like, Oh my gosh,
• 22:57
  Speaker: this website is so nice.
• 22:58
  Speaker: I love it so much.
• 23:01
  Speaker: And this is probably the third version of
• 23:04
  Speaker: this website within the past year.
• 23:09
  Speaker: And zero, zero registrations from new students.
• 23:16
  Speaker: Calls for people who are interested in a
• 23:17
  Speaker: service that I don't really offer much anymore.
• 23:23
  Speaker: And so I decided, let me restructure that
• 23:25
  Speaker: service since that's what I'm getting calls for.
• 23:29
  Speaker: But no bookings, nothing.
• 23:34
  Speaker: The money that I make for that business
• 23:37
  Speaker: comes through a third party.
• 23:42
  Speaker: And I don't want to delete my brand.
• 23:45
  Speaker: I worked hard for that brand.
• 23:47
  Speaker: And honestly, if that third party kicked me,
• 23:49
  Speaker: got rid of me tomorrow, today and said,
• 23:51
  Speaker: we don't want to work with you anymore,
• 23:52
  Speaker: I would be SOL.
• 23:54
  Speaker: I'd have to rebuild the website and everything.
• 23:56
  Speaker: So it doesn't make sense to keep the
• 23:57
  Speaker: website just as the backup plan for that.
• 24:02
  Speaker: But I do want to turn this website
• 24:06
  Speaker: around and get bookings again and all those
• 24:10
  Speaker: things.
• 24:10
  Speaker: So anyway, this video is not about that.
• 24:12
  Speaker: This video is not about that.
• 24:14
  Speaker: It's going to be about cleaning.
• 24:16
  Speaker: But as I'm trying to quickly edit this
• 24:19
  Speaker: webpage and then I'm going, okay, well this
• 24:22
  Speaker: is done, but now I need to create
• 24:23
  Speaker: this link and actually don't really want to
• 24:25
  Speaker: just link to that landing page because really
• 24:29
  Speaker: the information should be coming directly to this
• 24:32
  Speaker: other section.
• 24:33
  Speaker: And so I'm starting to redo more pages
• 24:35
  Speaker: and reconnect things.
• 24:37
  Speaker: And then I said, well, this, I thought
• 24:41
  Speaker: this was decluttered, but I did declutter with
• 24:44
  Speaker: the intention of doing one thing.
• 24:46
  Speaker: And now things have changed.
• 24:47
  Speaker: I got to declutter again.
• 24:49
  Speaker: And I got to sit down again and
• 24:51
  Speaker: look at my plan again and figure out
• 24:52
  Speaker: what is this business selling?
• 24:56
  Speaker: What is the way that I could present
• 24:59
  Speaker: what this business is offering and not confuse
• 25:04
  Speaker: people, not overwhelm people, not make it a
• 25:09
  Speaker: turnoff, not make it a turnoff and make
• 25:13
  Speaker: it seem like I know what I'm doing
• 25:14
  Speaker: because I do know what I'm doing.
• 25:15
  Speaker: And it's kind of this weird thing where
• 25:17
  Speaker: it's like vegetables, this business has become vegetables.
• 25:25
  Speaker: So, you know, vegetables are good for you,
• 25:28
  Speaker: but if you have too many vegetables to
• 25:31
  Speaker: choose from, then you're like, oh man, I
• 25:35
  Speaker: don't know.
• 25:36
  Speaker: I can't be bothered.
• 25:37
  Speaker: I can't pick which vegetable right now.
• 25:38
  Speaker: I don't even bother.
• 25:39
  Speaker: Just going to eat that frozen pizza.
• 25:41
  Speaker: Right.
• 25:41
  Speaker: And so by just limiting the choice, even
• 25:48
  Speaker: though all the vegetables are good.
• 25:50
  Speaker: And if you try any of the vegetables,
• 25:52
  Speaker: you're like, oh my gosh, this is amazing.
• 25:53
  Speaker: Why did I know about this before?
• 25:54
  Speaker: I got to tell my friends, right?
• 25:55
  Speaker: These are great vegetables, but clearly it's not
• 26:00
  Speaker: being presented in a way that is allowing
• 26:05
  Speaker: one to make choice.
• 26:07
  Speaker: So got to declutter.
• 26:10
  Speaker: And, you know, I've had a business, a
• 26:13
  Speaker: web design and a business design really, where
• 26:16
  Speaker: I said, well, look, if the third party
• 26:18
  Speaker: marketplace can have all of these different offerings
• 26:21
  Speaker: and people can search and it works for
• 26:23
  Speaker: the third party marketplace, why can't it work
• 26:25
  Speaker: for me individually?
• 26:27
  Speaker: And I had different, you know, mentors who
• 26:32
  Speaker: would say, just so much there.
• 26:34
  Speaker: It's kind of like overwhelming.
• 26:35
  Speaker: You really should just have like one or
• 26:36
  Speaker: two things for people to choose from.
• 26:38
  Speaker: This is too much.
• 26:39
  Speaker: I'm like, I don't understand because it works
• 26:42
  Speaker: for the marketplace.
• 26:43
  Speaker: Why can't it work for me?
• 26:44
  Speaker: Why can't I use that same business model?
• 26:46
  Speaker: Only it's just my brand that is offering
• 26:49
  Speaker: all of these things.
• 26:53
  Speaker: I'm just kind of creating my own competition.
• 26:59
  Speaker: And finally I just said, well, I'm not
• 27:02
  Speaker: getting the bookings that I want.
• 27:04
  Speaker: I'm not getting enough demand in any one
• 27:06
  Speaker: area.
• 27:06
  Speaker: So I'm going to try it their way.
• 27:07
  Speaker: I'm going to slim things down and see
• 27:10
  Speaker: if I get more.
• 27:12
  Speaker: Actually, I haven't, I really haven't.
• 27:17
  Speaker: But that's also partly, that's largely because I
• 27:20
  Speaker: haven't been focused on driving traffic just to
• 27:23
  Speaker: my site because I've been lost in this
• 27:25
  Speaker: whole process of, well, once the traffic gets
• 27:28
  Speaker: there, what do I want them to do?
• 27:30
  Speaker: What's the best course of action?
• 27:32
  Speaker: If I want them to know that they
• 27:35
  Speaker: do have options, do I want them to
• 27:39
  Speaker: sign up for the newsletter?
• 27:40
  Speaker: Do I want them to take a quiz?
• 27:41
  Speaker: Do I want them just to make a
• 27:42
  Speaker: direct purchase?
• 27:43
  Speaker: Do I want them to call me?
• 27:44
  Speaker: I've tried all of these things.
• 27:45
  Speaker: Mind you, I've tried to call me.
• 27:47
  Speaker: I tried the, uh, the problem with the
• 27:49
  Speaker: call me is that people don't want to
• 27:51
  Speaker: talk on the phone or they do call
• 27:54
  Speaker: you, but they're calling you at a time
• 27:56
  Speaker: when you're busy, right?
• 27:59
  Speaker: Or schedule a call.
• 28:02
  Speaker: People schedule calls and then they don't show
• 28:04
  Speaker: up for the scheduled call.
• 28:05
  Speaker: Schedule a meeting on Zoom.
• 28:09
  Speaker: People schedule, they don't show up.
• 28:11
  Speaker: Or people schedule, but it's not even for
• 28:15
  Speaker: something you are.
• 28:16
  Speaker: It's like, what, wait, you're interviewing for a
• 28:20
  Speaker: job and you just went to the website
• 28:22
  Speaker: and click schedule a call?
• 28:23
  Speaker: That's not how this works.
• 28:24
  Speaker: I've seen your resume.
• 28:25
  Speaker: I don't want to interview you.
• 28:27
  Speaker: I did not call you for a reason.
• 28:29
  Speaker: So I just it wasn't quite happening the
• 28:31
  Speaker: way I wanted, right?
• 28:33
  Speaker: Um, in terms of the, just make a
• 28:37
  Speaker: purchase, which we went on that model for
• 28:39
  Speaker: a very long time.
• 28:40
  Speaker: The problem with that is that people would
• 28:42
  Speaker: make a purchase and often the purchase would
• 28:47
  Speaker: be for a group class, but there weren't
• 28:48
  Speaker: enough students for the group class.
• 28:49
  Speaker: And so then you have this awkward period
• 28:51
  Speaker: of, well, I really want my kids to
• 28:53
  Speaker: be with other kids.
• 28:55
  Speaker: I'm like, well, I can't control that.
• 28:57
  Speaker: You know, we're trying.
• 28:58
  Speaker: We're not sitting over here going, yes, we
• 28:59
  Speaker: got one student.
• 29:00
  Speaker: We only want one.
• 29:01
  Speaker: Like that's not paying our bills.
• 29:03
  Speaker: Oh my goodness.
• 29:04
  Speaker: And that just became a horrible feeling.
• 29:07
  Speaker: So then we say, okay, well, we're just
• 29:08
  Speaker: going to focus on private lessons and let
• 29:10
  Speaker: people just pay for their private lessons.
• 29:13
  Speaker: Um, and just not driving enough traffic for
• 29:18
  Speaker: private lessons.
• 29:19
  Speaker: And I don't really love the idea of
• 29:21
  Speaker: only being available for people who want private
• 29:24
  Speaker: lessons, but I've also had to reframe that
• 29:27
  Speaker: thought because I think that the things my
• 29:31
  Speaker: business offers should be accessible to anybody who's
• 29:33
  Speaker: interested.
• 29:34
  Speaker: But by reframing the thought, I said to
• 29:36
  Speaker: myself, okay, maybe we focus on private lessons
• 29:39
  Speaker: through the website, but maybe I can give
• 29:43
  Speaker: for free on like YouTube or in-person
• 29:46
  Speaker: workshops and just find that balance that way.
• 29:51
  Speaker: And there's all this other third party thing
• 29:52
  Speaker: where they have a bigger marketing budget and
• 29:54
  Speaker: we have a larger opportunity to have more
• 29:58
  Speaker: group classes.