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How can I parent while also caring for others? · Wellbeing Solutions - Ask A Counsellor

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: Parenting while also caring for others, whether that's aging parents, a partner or another family member, is one of the most stretching positions to be in because you're pulled in multiple directions at once, and it's common to feel like you've never fully present for any one person, including yourself, and this is a sign of how much you're holding at once.
• 0:22
  SPEAKER_00: Now a helpful shift here is letting go of the idea that good parenting or good caregiving means being available to everyone at all times.
• 0:32
  SPEAKER_00: That standard isn't realistic nor is it sustainable, so instead try thinking in terms of what your children and the person you're caring for actually need rather than what you imagine a perfect version of you would give.
• 0:44
  SPEAKER_00: Often what kids need most is a parent who is calm and consistent, not one who is constantly stretched in trying to do everything.
• 0:52
  SPEAKER_00: And the same goes for the person you're caring for.
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_00: Presence in smaller amounts done consistently tends to matter more than trying to be everywhere at once.
• 1:02
  SPEAKER_00: Now, practical ways to support yourself with this is by starting by mapping out where your time and energy actually go in a typical week, as this helps you see where there's room to simplify or delegate or even ask for help rather than guessing at it in your own head.
• 1:18
  SPEAKER_00: If you have a partner, other family members or friends who've offer support, then take them up on it, as accepting help isn't a sign of failure, but it's part of managing everything well.
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_00: Where possible, build in small, non-negotiable pieces of time for yourself, even if it is just 10 minutes, since running empty affects your patience with your kids and your capacity to care for others as well.
• 1:42
  SPEAKER_00: It also helps to keep routines simple and predictable for your children where you can, since consistency gives them a sense of stability even when things around them are stretched.
• 1:53
  SPEAKER_00: And also tell someone what's going on, such as a partner, a friend, or even your GP, because saying it out loud often makes the load feel more manageable and helps open the door to practical support you might not have actually considered.
• 2:05
  SPEAKER_00: And if you're noticing ongoing exhaustion, low mood, irritability, or you're just struggling to function day to day, that's worth raising with your GP or a therapist.
• 2:16
  SPEAKER_00: Also, many parents in this position also benefit from care or support services, which can help with both practical and emotional aspects of caregiving.
• 2:26
  SPEAKER_00: Now you can head back into the app anytime for more on parenting while caring for others, and if you are thinking about harming yourself and feeling safe, then please seek urgent help by contacting your local emergency number or a crisis helpline.