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What does grieving someone who's still here mean? · Wellbeing Solutions - Ask A Counsellor

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  SPEAKER_00: What does grieving someone who is still here mean?
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  SPEAKER_00: Grieving someone who is still here means experiencing a sense of loss for someone who is alive but no longer emotionally, physically or relationally available to you in the way they once were.
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  SPEAKER_00: It is sometimes called ambiguous grief or ambiguous loss.
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  SPEAKER_00: You may not have lost the person themselves, but you may have lost the relationship, closeness, connection, or version of them that you once knew.
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  SPEAKER_00: There are many reasons why this happens.
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  SPEAKER_00: One reason is because there is an emotional disconnection.
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  SPEAKER_00: Someone is physically present but emotionally unavailable or become distant and or the relationship or friendship has ended.
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  SPEAKER_00: Another reason is because someone has changed through life experiences, addiction, illness or other circumstances.
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  SPEAKER_00: You could also be grieving the parent, partner or friend you needed them to be, but never really had.
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  SPEAKER_00: If this is the case, you can work through this by acknowledging the loss.
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  SPEAKER_00: Give yourself permission to grieve.
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  SPEAKER_00: Just because someone is alive doesn't mean your loss isn't real.
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  SPEAKER_00: You can't make someone change, apologize, or show up emotionally.
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  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes healing means loving someone from a distance rather than putting yourself through emotional pain.
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  SPEAKER_00: Some important questions to explore.
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  SPEAKER_00: Am I grieving the relationship we had or the relationship I wished we had?
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  SPEAKER_00: Am I holding on to who this person is today or am I holding on to who I hoped they would become?
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  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes the deepest grief isn't about losing someone, it is about accepting that the relationship you desperately wanted may never exist.
• 2:15
  SPEAKER_00: If you are thinking of harming yourself or feel unsafe, please call your local emergency number or crisis line.