Latest / Hurdle with Emily Abbate / 148. Trent Shelton, Motivational Speaker & Former NFL Player

Transcript

148. Trent Shelton, Motivational Speaker & Former NFL Player · Hurdle with Emily Abbate

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Your perspective is everything? Your perspective canned to be one
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: or two things? Your power, your prison?
• 0:18
  Speaker 2: What is going on? Everyone?
• 0:20
  Speaker 3: My name is Emily A Body and you are listening
• 0:23
  Speaker 3: to episode one of Hurdle, a wellness focused podcast where
• 0:27
  Speaker 3: I sit down with inspiring individuals to talk about big wins,
• 0:31
  Speaker 3: tough moments, and everything in between. On the show, you
• 0:35
  Speaker 3: can expect vulnerability, motivation, and candid discussions with everyone from
• 0:40
  Speaker 3: top athletes and CEOs to aspiring entrepreneurs and what it
• 0:44
  Speaker 3: really takes to follow your passions.
• 0:47
  Speaker 2: My mission is simple to.
• 0:49
  Speaker 3: Inspire you to be your best self, move with intention,
• 0:53
  Speaker 3: and have some fun along the way. Today I am
• 0:57
  Speaker 3: chatting with Trent Shelton's motivational speaker and former NFL player.
• 1:03
  Speaker 3: In today's episode, Trek fills me in on what it
• 1:06
  Speaker 3: was really like to chase after the dream he had
• 1:08
  Speaker 3: since he was young of playing football professional aid. After
• 1:12
  Speaker 3: his athletic career ended prematurely and he lost one of
• 1:15
  Speaker 3: his closest college friends to suicide, he knew he had
• 1:19
  Speaker 3: to make a pivot and take his faith into his
• 1:22
  Speaker 3: own hands. Trent talks to me about growing his business
• 1:25
  Speaker 3: from the ground up and the early days recording two
• 1:28
  Speaker 3: minute inspirational video segments daily posting them to social media
• 1:34
  Speaker 3: using the hashtag rehab time. The messages, which were hard
• 1:38
  Speaker 3: hitting but always uplifting, started resonating with millions of people
• 1:42
  Speaker 3: around the globe, and in the years that followed, his
• 1:45
  Speaker 3: social following exploded. Since then, he founded the Rehab Time Organization,
• 1:51
  Speaker 3: a nonprofit with a mission to serve a worldwide community
• 1:54
  Speaker 3: by empowering and demonstrating that change starts within. He's also
• 1:59
  Speaker 3: now a father of three, and today he talks to
• 2:03
  Speaker 3: me about the lessons that fatherhood has brought him. We
• 2:07
  Speaker 3: also talk about understanding the true beauty of our own worth,
• 2:12
  Speaker 3: how we can better protect our own piece and the
• 2:16
  Speaker 3: importance of vulnerability, and how to get more comfortable being
• 2:20
  Speaker 3: your authentic self both online and ir L. Before we
• 2:26
  Speaker 3: get into it today, I want to take a moment
• 2:28
  Speaker 3: to thank my sponsor at beam Bean is a Boston
• 2:32
  Speaker 3: based CBD company that is making waves in the wellness
• 2:35
  Speaker 3: industry by offering products that combine THCHC free CBD with.
• 2:41
  Speaker 2: Other high quality ingredients.
• 2:43
  Speaker 3: Whether you are sore or stressed, CBD can be key
• 2:47
  Speaker 3: for recovery and self care. You guys know me I
• 2:50
  Speaker 3: live an active lifestyle and to keep up with my
• 2:55
  Speaker 3: ever evolving training schedule, I have been leaning into their
• 2:59
  Speaker 3: Boost topical which helps to boost athletic recovery, ease inflammation,
• 3:04
  Speaker 3: and soothe sore muscles. You have got to get in
• 3:08
  Speaker 3: on the beam game today. Head on over to beam
• 3:10
  Speaker 3: tlc dot com that is b e a M t
• 3:13
  Speaker 3: lc dot com and use the promo code Hurdle for
• 3:17
  Speaker 3: fifteen percent off any product today. Again, that is beam
• 3:21
  Speaker 3: tlc dot com b e A m t lc dot com.
• 3:24
  Speaker 3: Use the code Hurdle at check out for fifteen percent
• 3:28
  Speaker 3: off today.
• 3:29
  Speaker 2: I'm really excited this week.
• 3:30
  Speaker 3: On Tuesday night, the twenty third, I am hosting the
• 3:33
  Speaker 3: Hurdle book Club at eight pm. We are going to
• 3:36
  Speaker 3: be reading Alexipoppus's book Bravy. Spoiler alert. I don't do
• 3:41
  Speaker 3: this often, but Alexi is coming to a Hurdle feed
• 3:45
  Speaker 3: near u a SAP, so stay tuned for her episode.
• 3:49
  Speaker 3: If you can make the book club and want to
• 3:50
  Speaker 3: join in for some good conversation, head on over to
• 3:53
  Speaker 3: the show notes. The link to register is in there. Also,
• 3:56
  Speaker 3: make sure you are staying in a loop with Hurdle
• 3:58
  Speaker 3: on social at her podcast and I'm over at Emily
• 4:02
  Speaker 3: a Body, and if you have yet to do so,
• 4:04
  Speaker 3: subscribe to the weekly Hurdle newsletter over there. I'm offering
• 4:09
  Speaker 3: up everything from content picks of the week, stuff that's
• 4:12
  Speaker 3: really resonating with me, to some of my go to
• 4:16
  Speaker 3: gear and favorites that are in my regular rotation at
• 4:19
  Speaker 3: the minute, and just really loving connecting.
• 4:22
  Speaker 2: With the hurdle community in a new way.
• 4:25
  Speaker 3: Link to sign up in the show notes. With that,
• 4:28
  Speaker 3: let's get to hurdling.
• 4:38
  Speaker 2: Today.
• 4:38
  Speaker 3: I'm sitting down with Trent Shelton. He's a former NFL
• 4:42
  Speaker 3: wide receiver turned influential speaker author.
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: How are you doing, Trent?
• 4:47
  Speaker 4: I'm doing good. How are you doing?
• 4:49
  Speaker 3: I'm doing quite well. So before we really get into this,
• 4:53
  Speaker 3: two things. The first thing, I do want to let
• 4:55
  Speaker 3: you know that my thoughts and prayers are with you
• 4:57
  Speaker 3: and your family. I know that you have been going
• 4:59
  Speaker 3: through some hard stuff with your mother right now.
• 5:02
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I really appreciate that.
• 5:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's pretty tough, but we definitely feel the prayers
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: from so many people and I'm grateful for that, so thank.
• 5:10
  Speaker 2: You, of course.
• 5:11
  Speaker 3: And the second thing is I'm just gonna bring this
• 5:14
  Speaker 3: into the mix. So the one time that you and
• 5:17
  Speaker 3: I have crossed paths. So we were having dinner at
• 5:19
  Speaker 3: the Meatball Shop, and when we were sitting there, a
• 5:21
  Speaker 3: conversation came up that you were thinking that maybe at
• 5:25
  Speaker 3: some point or another within the next few years you
• 5:28
  Speaker 3: could run a marathon.
• 5:32
  Speaker 2: Where are we on that? Where are we on that?
• 5:34
  Speaker 1: So quick? So yeah, so I definitely. So I put
• 5:38
  Speaker 1: it like this. So last year, I was gonna do
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: it half and I've done it half before, and I
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: was gonna do another half for work. And I got
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: really really sick in February, so I think it was
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: COVID without me knowing it at the time, really really sick.
• 5:48
  Speaker 1: So I couldn't do it. So I ran a ten
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: k and I was like, you know, I'm just gonna
• 5:51
  Speaker 1: crush the tin k. So I ran a fast time
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: for me and so like, I fell in love with
• 5:55
  Speaker 1: the ten k. So I'm like, I want to like
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: beat my time again. So if I do a marathon,
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: to be New York City and That's what I'm gonna do.
• 6:03
  Speaker 2: Fair.
• 6:03
  Speaker 3: Fair, you are known to your more than fifteen million
• 6:08
  Speaker 3: social followers as this influential speaker, But that didn't just
• 6:13
  Speaker 3: happen overnight. So I want to dial it back. I
• 6:16
  Speaker 3: know you were raised in Fort Worth. Talk to me
• 6:19
  Speaker 3: about what life was like growing up for you.
• 6:22
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: So, so I live most of my life in full Worth,
• 6:26
  Speaker 1: like seventh grade. Before then, I was in New Orleans
• 6:30
  Speaker 1: or Kenner area where really it was the same thing,
• 6:33
  Speaker 1: New Orleans, and I stayed there. I was there from
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: like one to like twelve, and so two older brothers,
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: mom and dad, both from the house and then so
• 6:41
  Speaker 1: I just had competitive brothers, so like I was the youngest.
• 6:44
  Speaker 1: So I always tell people like, I give them the
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: credit for me being just a good athlete because always
• 6:48
  Speaker 1: at the competing against them. My middle brother is four
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: years older, and then my oldest brother is seven years older.
• 6:53
  Speaker 1: So they always like they didn't give me no slack.
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: But we were a close family, still are. So it
• 6:57
  Speaker 1: was pretty cool.
• 6:58
  Speaker 4: Man.
• 6:58
  Speaker 1: We did a lot together and still do a lot.
• 7:01
  Speaker 1: So it was a great environment growing up in And
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: I always tell people this too. This is just a
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: side note, Like I lived across the street from a
• 7:09
  Speaker 1: Saints player at the time, and so and my uncle
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: he just hasn't retired. They actually got fired from the charges,
• 7:15
  Speaker 1: but he's been coaching for thirty years. In NFL, and
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: so I was blessed enough to be able to be
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: around that, and that really like helped me see that
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: what was possible, Like because growing up, you know, you
• 7:24
  Speaker 1: have all these dreams and you just like, Okay, that's
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: a great dream, but I don't really think it's achievable.
• 7:28
  Speaker 1: But then when I saw you know, his name is
• 7:30
  Speaker 1: Gene Atkins' son, Gino plays now. So I used to
• 7:33
  Speaker 1: babysit Gino. It's funny. But I saw like, oh, this
• 7:36
  Speaker 1: dude is actually human being, like he just he works out,
• 7:39
  Speaker 1: he runs. So it was a cool experience for me
• 7:41
  Speaker 1: because it showed me that it was very tangible to
• 7:43
  Speaker 1: make it to the NFL.
• 7:44
  Speaker 4: I just had that dream come true.
• 7:46
  Speaker 2: What's the percentage that makes it in the NFL.
• 7:49
  Speaker 1: It's like it's less than a percent It's like zero
• 7:52
  Speaker 1: zero zero, it's like point zero zeros are like And
• 7:56
  Speaker 1: I know the percentage because every teacher told me that percentage.
• 7:59
  Speaker 4: You know, I mean just people. You know, you hear
• 8:01
  Speaker 4: it a lot.
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: And I'm not saying that that's a bad thing, you know,
• 8:04
  Speaker 1: but you just hear it a lot.
• 8:06
  Speaker 4: And so I always said I was going to be
• 8:07
  Speaker 4: that less than one percent.
• 8:11
  Speaker 3: So growing up, you definitely had aspirations to play in
• 8:14
  Speaker 3: the NFL. Talk to me about playing in college at Baylor.
• 8:18
  Speaker 4: Yeah, so Baylor was everything.
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: You know, we struggled at the time, but I think
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: we were a big piece of turning Baylor around. You know,
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: Baylor is pretty I mean we had a bad season
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: last year, but change the coaches in COVID and all
• 8:30
  Speaker 1: that stuff, but it's really been a powerhouse in the
• 8:32
  Speaker 1: Big twelve. And you know, playing there it was tough
• 8:35
  Speaker 1: because we struggled a lot, but we were just on
• 8:37
  Speaker 1: the custom actually getting better. So it taught me a
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: lot about you know, determination. It taught me a lot
• 8:42
  Speaker 1: about you know, when things are on going right, still
• 8:43
  Speaker 1: find a way and focusing on winning and just the atmosphere,
• 8:46
  Speaker 1: I mean, the coaches, I mean lifelong friends, brotherhoods. Still
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: talk to those guys today and that really helped me,
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: you know, just for success, not on the field, but
• 8:55
  Speaker 1: also just in life because I feel like that adversity
• 8:57
  Speaker 1: was set up against us, and so it's taught me
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: how to face adversity, you know, more than anything.
• 9:02
  Speaker 3: Football in college was great, and you really felt like
• 9:05
  Speaker 3: you were like, all right, we're on this upper trajectory,
• 9:07
  Speaker 3: like this is the move. Everything's kind of going toward
• 9:10
  Speaker 3: that sub one percent situation and then what happens.
• 9:15
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so you know, I I was all big twelve
• 9:19
  Speaker 1: my senior year, and you know my uncle who I
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: saw about earlier, he was kind of my insight. You know,
• 9:24
  Speaker 1: he was at with the Falcons at the time. I
• 9:26
  Speaker 1: think he just went to the Vikings team just like, hey,
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: you know when I was with the Falcons, we had
• 9:29
  Speaker 1: you like fourth fifth round pick, you know, so you
• 9:31
  Speaker 1: know you probably get drafted, and so I was like
• 9:33
  Speaker 1: holding on to it that I was like, yes, like
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna get drafted.
• 9:35
  Speaker 4: I didn't get an invite to the combine and.
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: I was kind of hurt my lab and I was like,
• 9:39
  Speaker 1: you know what, I'm just gonna crush it out my
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: pro day, had a good pro day, and I just
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: thought I was gonna get drafted. That didn't happen, and
• 9:45
  Speaker 1: so my dreams were crushed. You know, you're like, it's
• 9:48
  Speaker 1: like it's funny now I can laugh about it, but
• 9:50
  Speaker 1: it wasn't funny then. Like I was like watching the
• 9:51
  Speaker 1: TV and like I'm having to pretend like I'm good.
• 9:54
  Speaker 1: Like my mom was like are you okay, Like it's
• 9:56
  Speaker 1: fifth round, sixth round, seventh round. I'm like, I'm good side.
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: Because it's crazy with sports, like we determine our worth
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: by performance. So for me, I was like, I'm not
• 10:09
  Speaker 1: feeling like I'm enough. I'm like, dang, I'm not enough.
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: All this work and I didn't get drafted. So end
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: up going to undrafted free agent hot priority, which means
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: like people wanted to draft you but they didn't. So
• 10:18
  Speaker 1: after the draft, my phone was running off the hook.
• 10:20
  Speaker 1: I got some counsel from my uncle. He was like, man,
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: go to Indianapolis. He's like, I know coach Dongee, and
• 10:25
  Speaker 1: he's gonna give you a fair shake. So I went
• 10:26
  Speaker 1: to Indy in two thousand and seven, the year that
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: they won the Super Bowl.
• 10:31
  Speaker 3: I mean, I can imagine making that decision, just going
• 10:33
  Speaker 3: to Indianapolis after things didn't go as you had hoped.
• 10:37
  Speaker 3: Did you feel like you were taking a big risk
• 10:41
  Speaker 3: or did you feel like in your gut this is
• 10:43
  Speaker 3: definitely it, this is going to pan out. Like where
• 10:45
  Speaker 3: were you in the optimism spectrum?
• 10:48
  Speaker 1: It was I was kind of in the middle, like
• 10:50
  Speaker 1: you know, just from the fact of like me getting
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: a fair shake, like my hair because so there was
• 10:55
  Speaker 1: other teams. I am not going to say that, Like
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: I wan like they were offering me more money, right,
• 10:59
  Speaker 1: and I was like, I want to go they like,
• 11:00
  Speaker 1: I want that signing bonus because they still give signing
• 11:02
  Speaker 1: bonus to free agents, and I want to go there.
• 11:04
  Speaker 4: My uncle's like telling you, don't do it.
• 11:06
  Speaker 1: He was like go here. He's like, they're going to
• 11:07
  Speaker 1: give you a fair shake. And so that kind of
• 11:10
  Speaker 1: gave me the confidence that the ball was in my court.
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: And that's all I wanted. I wanted to come to
• 11:14
  Speaker 1: a situation where the ball was in my court. Looking back,
• 11:16
  Speaker 1: it might not been the best idea. I don't like
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: to talk about this. I want to use that as
• 11:20
  Speaker 1: a blame mechanism. But we had two draft picks in
• 11:22
  Speaker 1: front of me. So we had a first rounder and
• 11:24
  Speaker 1: we had a fifth rounder. And you know, it's business.
• 11:27
  Speaker 1: You know, I can play the best football ever, but
• 11:30
  Speaker 1: you're gonna give those guys more of a shot because
• 11:32
  Speaker 1: you invested, you know, millions of dollars in these in
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: these guys by sewing, by signing bonuses. So you know,
• 11:38
  Speaker 1: but it went great. I mean, in my preseason, I
• 11:41
  Speaker 1: believe I left the NFL at least to the fourth
• 11:43
  Speaker 1: game with yards as a rookie, and so, I mean
• 11:46
  Speaker 1: it went great, and I thought that, you know, Indianapolis
• 11:49
  Speaker 1: was going to be the spot for me for sure.
• 11:51
  Speaker 3: And then you proceeded to bop around from one to
• 11:54
  Speaker 3: two to three cities. So in that bop, in going
• 11:58
  Speaker 3: from team to team, what did you start to learn
• 12:02
  Speaker 3: about your own resiliency? Because I can't imagine that that
• 12:05
  Speaker 3: was easy for you.
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: Yeah, looking back, you know, during the storm, I didn't
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: really realize anything, Like I was just depressed and hurt.
• 12:13
  Speaker 1: But looking back, you know, I always say this, you know,
• 12:15
  Speaker 1: strength strength isn't always shown, and being strong it shows
• 12:19
  Speaker 1: how you respond, you know, while being weak in those moments.
• 12:22
  Speaker 1: So now I look back, I'm like, man, I had
• 12:24
  Speaker 1: a lot of emotional resilience because you know, going from
• 12:27
  Speaker 1: city to city, not knowing practice squad, not knowing that
• 12:31
  Speaker 1: if like, I've had situations where I'll go to practice
• 12:34
  Speaker 1: and then after practice I will be cut, like they're like, hey,
• 12:37
  Speaker 1: you know, come in here as I'm walking off the field,
• 12:39
  Speaker 1: and so it's so much pressure to be like, dang,
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: if I dropped this ball, like I could be going
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: home and so it was very very hard. I mean,
• 12:46
  Speaker 1: different teammates, new city, new environments, not knowing if you're
• 12:50
  Speaker 1: going to be cut the next day or not, even
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: if everything goes right. And I had a guy that
• 12:54
  Speaker 1: I played with, Krafondo Thorpe, and he told me this,
• 12:57
  Speaker 1: and I'll never forget he said. Bro, He's like, I
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: just want to tell you this to let the pressure
• 13:01
  Speaker 1: off of you, because he was a high draft pick
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: with the Florida State. He's like, I've seen it, he said.
• 13:05
  Speaker 1: I've seen guys play perfect football, especially in your position,
• 13:09
  Speaker 1: play perfect football and still get cut. And I've seen
• 13:12
  Speaker 1: people play imperfect football and still make it. So that
• 13:15
  Speaker 1: took the pressure off of me because I knew, yes,
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: the ball is in my court for how I show up,
• 13:20
  Speaker 1: but ultimately, you know they're going to make decisions, you know,
• 13:23
  Speaker 1: based upon what I can't control anyway, So it was tough.
• 13:28
  Speaker 3: So when it finally gets to the point when you're
• 13:31
  Speaker 3: like I'm out, like, talk to me about what happens
• 13:35
  Speaker 3: in the days after this is finally done.
• 13:38
  Speaker 4: I made it.
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: That was a scene in my mind probably two thousand
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: and eight after I left the Seahawks off season, and
• 13:45
  Speaker 1: that's when I made the decision to start rehab time.
• 13:47
  Speaker 1: So I was still playing ball, but at that time,
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: I was like, man, you know what, it's rehab talk.
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: I remember sitting to my room at my parents' house,
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: like depressed, crying, and I was just complaining to guy
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: like man like, like this is it, you know, this
• 14:00
  Speaker 1: is my life is over.
• 14:01
  Speaker 4: It's done, Like this sucks.
• 14:03
  Speaker 1: And I just had a common spirit over me and
• 14:06
  Speaker 1: I just felt like this is just the beginning, you know,
• 14:09
  Speaker 1: And I just like, man like, So I focused on
• 14:11
  Speaker 1: what I can control, and that's why I'm going to
• 14:12
  Speaker 1: share people Like so many times we focus on the
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: things we can't control. But at that moment, I said,
• 14:17
  Speaker 1: what can I control? And so I said, I can
• 14:18
  Speaker 1: control my body and soul. I can control picking up
• 14:21
  Speaker 1: books because I wasn't a reader. I can control like
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: really taking care of my health to my body because
• 14:25
  Speaker 1: I really wasn't doing that to the level I should
• 14:27
  Speaker 1: have been doing it. Now I can control my soul.
• 14:29
  Speaker 1: I can control you know, yoga, prayer, meditation, all these things.
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: And so it's funny because I felt like the magnet
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: that was pulling me to that is I knew I
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: had one more year to prove myself.
• 14:40
  Speaker 4: NFL, you use that three years, right, not for long.
• 14:42
  Speaker 4: That's what it stands for.
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: So I knew I had one more workout, and I
• 14:47
  Speaker 1: knew if I ran a four to three, I knew
• 14:49
  Speaker 1: I would get signed. Like I just knew it, because
• 14:50
  Speaker 1: that's how a lot of this works. I was like,
• 14:52
  Speaker 1: if you fast, it opens up the door. So I
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: just prided myself from running a four three. I made
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: a long story short. I ran a four to three,
• 14:59
  Speaker 1: Go to wash it and I get cut again. Same thing.
• 15:01
  Speaker 1: But I was in a better place because I felt
• 15:03
  Speaker 1: like there was more to my life. It was two
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: thousand and eleven. I was now playing arena football, which
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: is terrible and I can say it because Rena's not
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: around no more. But I was playing. I was miserable.
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: I hated it. It was somewhat fun, but I just
• 15:16
  Speaker 1: hated it. So I was like, this is what I
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: want this. I don't want this for my life. And
• 15:20
  Speaker 1: what happened was I was supposed to go to New
• 15:24
  Speaker 1: Orleans to report to the New Orleans Vodoo on Friday.
• 15:28
  Speaker 1: One of my close friends and I could talk about
• 15:31
  Speaker 1: the story four hours, So I'll be short one of
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: my close friends. His dad's a pastor in Dallas, and
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: he was like, Hey, I want you to come speak
• 15:36
  Speaker 1: at our church. And I was like, it was crazy
• 15:39
  Speaker 1: to me because I'm not a speaker, mentioned right, like
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: why you want me to speak at your church? And
• 15:43
  Speaker 1: he was like, man, I've had conversations with you and
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: my brothers, my sisters, my dad like I know a
• 15:49
  Speaker 1: gift when I see it, So I come speak. And
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: so I called my coach. It was on that Friday.
• 15:53
  Speaker 1: I called my coach and he told me. I was like, hey,
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: can I come Saturday. He's like, yeah, you can come Saturday.
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: Blah bah blah. So I knew I didn't want to
• 16:00
  Speaker 1: go to New Orleans. I knew I didn't, but I
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: was like, what else is there to Trent Shelter without football?
• 16:06
  Speaker 1: So I speak on the stage and make a long
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: story short. That's when I made the decision to say
• 16:11
  Speaker 1: I'm done with sports. So it was that moment of
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: me walking into my biggest fear of public speaking, speaking
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: for five minutes, that's it, five minutes, and making that
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: decision right after that.
• 16:22
  Speaker 3: That's crazy, though, I mean, you had done no previous speaking.
• 16:26
  Speaker 3: You said you had started rehab time. So before we
• 16:28
  Speaker 3: keep going into this, why don't we establish what it
• 16:32
  Speaker 3: is that rehab time is.
• 16:34
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 16:35
  Speaker 1: So, so rehab is you know, the acronym is renewing
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: every hardened body. So all rehab is it's putting the
• 16:40
  Speaker 1: strength back into a weakness mind, body, and soul. So
• 16:42
  Speaker 1: that's a physical strength, that's a spiritual strength, that's a
• 16:45
  Speaker 1: mental strength, and that's all rehab time is. So it's
• 16:48
  Speaker 1: you know, the truth is, we're all in rehab. We're
• 16:50
  Speaker 1: all trying to better something. We're all you know, having
• 16:53
  Speaker 1: injuries in our life, whether it's a bad relationship or
• 16:55
  Speaker 1: maybe it's a failed dream and we're trying to recover
• 16:57
  Speaker 1: from it, or maybe it's addiction.
• 16:59
  Speaker 4: We're trying to cover become better.
• 17:00
  Speaker 1: So the message that I put out are holistically for
• 17:03
  Speaker 1: people to get better.
• 17:05
  Speaker 3: Okay, And when you had started that, what did that
• 17:09
  Speaker 3: look like aside from just like trying to put these
• 17:11
  Speaker 3: messages into the world.
• 17:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah, So the first thing it looked like was it
• 17:14
  Speaker 1: all started like so you hear me say it all
• 17:16
  Speaker 1: starts for you. So that was my phrase, it still
• 17:18
  Speaker 1: is my phrase. So it first looked like me working
• 17:21
  Speaker 1: on myself, and it was me going on back then.
• 17:24
  Speaker 1: I don't know if you remember. It was like you
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: stream was like the live streaming service. So I would
• 17:27
  Speaker 1: go and you stream and I would stream my workouts
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: and people would come in, you know, the little audience
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: I have from sports. They would come in and they
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: would ask me questions. And Twitter was a big avenue
• 17:36
  Speaker 1: for me at that time in two thousand and nine,
• 17:37
  Speaker 1: and so people would come and ask me questions.
• 17:39
  Speaker 4: And then I was just going to.
• 17:40
  Speaker 1: Show my workout, but people asked me questions about life,
• 17:43
  Speaker 1: and that turned into me you know, doing a you
• 17:46
  Speaker 1: know YouTube, you know, because I didn't have time to
• 17:49
  Speaker 1: always go live.
• 17:50
  Speaker 4: And then that turned into me creating shirts.
• 17:52
  Speaker 1: So as I as I started to realize like this
• 17:55
  Speaker 1: was an actual thing, you know, I started to I
• 17:57
  Speaker 1: created shirts my merch and the shirt WOU was seeming
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: heartening on my past. And I tell people today like
• 18:02
  Speaker 1: I was trapping the shirts out of my trunk, like
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: literally like going from a place to place. And I
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: started doing events and so I would call them live conversations.
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: And live conversations was me going to cities like New
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: York and you know, going to a small venue asking somebody, hey,
• 18:18
  Speaker 1: do you have an apartment complex like clubhouse. Do you
• 18:21
  Speaker 1: know a library I could use? You know, do you
• 18:24
  Speaker 1: have like anywhere I could speak in the city. I
• 18:27
  Speaker 1: would do it. And I would use the money from
• 18:28
  Speaker 1: T shirts to be able to cover my expenses and
• 18:31
  Speaker 1: like literally putting the groundwork of spreading rehab time for
• 18:34
  Speaker 1: about two to three years, that's what rehab time started
• 18:37
  Speaker 1: looking like. And I would have conference calls also when
• 18:40
  Speaker 1: it wasn't popular to do so. I don't know if
• 18:41
  Speaker 1: it's popular now, but I would literally bring speakers in
• 18:44
  Speaker 1: or even myself and have these conference calls. I remember
• 18:46
  Speaker 1: ten people will be on the car. I remember it
• 18:48
  Speaker 1: got to thirty. We're like, man, we got thirty people.
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: This is crazy. Then it got to one hundred. Then
• 18:52
  Speaker 1: it got to a place where free conference calling it
• 18:54
  Speaker 1: couldn't hold like the people no more.
• 18:56
  Speaker 4: It was like a thousand.
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: So that's what it looked like, like literally from the
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: mud rock bottom of like really grinding it out.
• 19:02
  Speaker 3: You said that you are an introvert, and then you
• 19:06
  Speaker 3: went up and you did this five minute public speaking
• 19:08
  Speaker 3: gig for someone who also identifies it as an introvert.
• 19:12
  Speaker 3: What would you tell them if they're like, how the
• 19:14
  Speaker 3: hell would you even do that? Like what suggestions would
• 19:17
  Speaker 3: you even give them to show up in that kind
• 19:19
  Speaker 3: of way.
• 19:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah, So think about being an introvert. It doesn't mean
• 19:23
  Speaker 1: that you're shy, right, I think sometimes people get that confused.
• 19:27
  Speaker 1: I think with me being an introvert, I just make
• 19:28
  Speaker 1: my words count. I'm a listener. I think one of
• 19:30
  Speaker 1: the greatest gifts is to listen. You can learn a
• 19:32
  Speaker 1: lot about people, you can learn a lot about the environment.
• 19:35
  Speaker 1: And my grandmother always told me, like, make sure your
• 19:37
  Speaker 1: words count when you speak. So that's the thing about
• 19:40
  Speaker 1: me being an introvert. But I tell people like to
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: be able to get through a fear of public speaking
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: or any type of fear when the mission is strong enough.
• 19:49
  Speaker 1: When the mission is great enough, the fear will never
• 19:51
  Speaker 1: be strong enough. So if you think about this in
• 19:53
  Speaker 1: your life, there's probably a lot of fearful moments that
• 19:56
  Speaker 1: you went through right, but you did it anyway because
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: there was something on the other side that was great
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: enough for you to pull through. And I use example
• 20:04
  Speaker 1: of like I could be outside right now and I
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: could see a live in a country. So it can
• 20:09
  Speaker 1: be like some coyotes or some run outside right and
• 20:13
  Speaker 1: I'm not. You know, I'm pretty I'm gonna say I'm
• 20:14
  Speaker 1: pretty scared of Kyloe. Everbody just gonna go out there
• 20:16
  Speaker 1: with some coyots and just chill with them. But if
• 20:19
  Speaker 1: my daughter is outside right playing, I don't care about
• 20:23
  Speaker 1: those coyotes. I'm gonna go out there and get my
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: daughter because what's on the other side is bigger than
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: the fear. And so that's what I tell people. You know,
• 20:32
  Speaker 1: when the mission is great enough, you'll walk through any
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: fear every single day.
• 20:42
  Speaker 3: Taking a break from today's episode to talk to you
• 20:44
  Speaker 3: about Blue Blocks. Like many of you, this past year,
• 20:49
  Speaker 3: I have been working what feels like harder than ever before.
• 20:54
  Speaker 3: Once the pandemic hit, I was staring at my computer
• 20:57
  Speaker 3: screen well into the night, and over time I started
• 21:01
  Speaker 3: to experience regular headaches and the effects of digital eyestrain. Now,
• 21:06
  Speaker 3: this can be extremely uncomfortable, and that is where blue
• 21:10
  Speaker 3: Blocks comes into the mix. Blue Box was created to
• 21:14
  Speaker 3: fix this problem and block out the blue light with
• 21:17
  Speaker 3: high quality lenses. Unlike other types of blue light glasses,
• 21:21
  Speaker 3: blue blocks are evidence backed and made under optimal laboratory conditions.
• 21:26
  Speaker 3: In Australia, blue Blox makes high quality lenses for daytime, nighttime,
• 21:32
  Speaker 3: and color therapy in line with the suggested pure reviewed
• 21:36
  Speaker 3: academic literature.
• 21:38
  Speaker 2: You guys know this.
• 21:39
  Speaker 3: I only bring you information on products that are in
• 21:42
  Speaker 3: my regular rotation. I am wearing Blue Blocks glasses every
• 21:47
  Speaker 3: single day. I've got at least three pairs in my apartment.
• 21:51
  Speaker 3: Whether you need prescription, non prescription, or readers, they.
• 21:55
  Speaker 2: Have got whatever you are after.
• 21:57
  Speaker 3: Head on over to blue Blocks dot com slash her
• 22:00
  Speaker 3: and get fifteen percent off using the code hurdle at checkout. Again,
• 22:03
  Speaker 3: that is blue Blocks dot com slash hurdle, b l
• 22:07
  Speaker 3: u blox dot com slash hurdle and get fifteen percent
• 22:12
  Speaker 3: off using the code hurdle at checkout. Also, want to
• 22:16
  Speaker 3: give some love to my friends at Athletic Greens. You
• 22:20
  Speaker 3: know when you reach for a green juice and it
• 22:22
  Speaker 3: tastes like you're drinking grass.
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah, Athletic Greens is not that at all.
• 22:30
  Speaker 3: With seventy five whole food source ingredients and the antioxidant
• 22:34
  Speaker 3: equivalent of twelve servings of fruits and vegetables, Athletic Greens
• 22:37
  Speaker 3: is a sweet sip that makes getting in your regular
• 22:42
  Speaker 3: greens absolutely delicious. It's also got prebiotics probiotics adaptagens and superfoods,
• 22:49
  Speaker 3: so much goodness to help me start every day off
• 22:53
  Speaker 3: in the right direction. They are offering a special deal
• 22:57
  Speaker 3: to hurdle listeners. It's a year's supply of Vitamin D
• 23:00
  Speaker 3: as well as five free travel packs with your first purchase.
• 23:04
  Speaker 3: Just head on over to Athleticgreens dot com slash hurdle
• 23:08
  Speaker 3: to get yours today.
• 23:09
  Speaker 2: No code necessary.
• 23:11
  Speaker 3: Again, that is Athleticgreens dot com slash hurdle to get
• 23:15
  Speaker 3: yours today. Trust me, this all in one daily nutritional
• 23:19
  Speaker 3: supplement will change your life. So when you make the
• 23:32
  Speaker 3: decision not to go to New Orleans, what happens from
• 23:35
  Speaker 3: there for you?
• 23:37
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so I make some phone calls and you know,
• 23:42
  Speaker 1: I'm trying to get validation. It's so funny. We try
• 23:44
  Speaker 1: to get validation from proximity, meaning that usually when something
• 23:48
  Speaker 1: is like we have a dream or vision and hopefully
• 23:51
  Speaker 1: you can go to the people close to you, by
• 23:52
  Speaker 1: the way, like, I don't want to make that a
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: negative thing, but oftentimes we go to our proximity, like
• 23:56
  Speaker 1: the people closest when we bring this vision, and oftentimes
• 23:59
  Speaker 1: that's the wrong place to go. And so I call
• 24:02
  Speaker 1: my friends and they don't get it. They like, bro,
• 24:04
  Speaker 1: you tripping and there was a lot of value for
• 24:07
  Speaker 1: them and me still playing football because at that time
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: I had an entertainment company and all this stuff, so
• 24:12
  Speaker 1: we were going out, like the lifestyle was there, so
• 24:15
  Speaker 1: like if I stopped that, then a lot is cut
• 24:18
  Speaker 1: off and so that like you're tripping. And I called
• 24:21
  Speaker 1: my parents and I called my mom. Actually I was
• 24:23
  Speaker 1: holding my dad pick up the phone, but my mom did.
• 24:25
  Speaker 1: And I told my mom like that night, I was like, hey, Mom,
• 24:27
  Speaker 1: I'm through, like I don't want to I'm not playing
• 24:30
  Speaker 1: no more.
• 24:30
  Speaker 4: I'm sorry to disappoint you.
• 24:31
  Speaker 1: And it got quiet, like you're ever, like you're talking
• 24:33
  Speaker 1: to somebody, like look down, make sure the phone is
• 24:35
  Speaker 1: still like own, and so it got super quiet, and
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: you know, she just asked me like are you sure
• 24:42
  Speaker 1: you want to do that? And I just told her
• 24:44
  Speaker 1: like what I felt. I was like, Mom, I've never
• 24:46
  Speaker 1: felt so much confidence in the mister fear, like I
• 24:48
  Speaker 1: just I can't explain. I know, this is it, Like
• 24:50
  Speaker 1: I just know. And she's like, you know what, go
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: do it. And that's when I made the decision to
• 24:56
  Speaker 1: like like a real decision or a decision that that
• 24:59
  Speaker 1: cuts off the road bridge that you're not going back.
• 25:01
  Speaker 1: And I just made that decision, and you know, I
• 25:03
  Speaker 1: started making videos and I would say like probably a
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: year later, less than a year, videos started to go
• 25:09
  Speaker 1: viral and it changed my life forever.
• 25:11
  Speaker 3: I think something to touch on here that's really important
• 25:14
  Speaker 3: is you were so worried about just being Trent shell
• 25:18
  Speaker 3: In and not being Trent shell In the football player.
• 25:21
  Speaker 3: And I think that's us That's just something that a
• 25:24
  Speaker 3: lot of people can seriously relate to, especially like if
• 25:27
  Speaker 3: you're a runner and you get injured and you can't run, like, okay,
• 25:30
  Speaker 3: what am I doing here? If you're you know, so
• 25:32
  Speaker 3: many people in the pandemic like commuting to work and
• 25:34
  Speaker 3: identifying so like strongly with their occupation and what they
• 25:37
  Speaker 3: were doing, and that shifted and maybe they lost their job.
• 25:40
  Speaker 3: And I think that's just you know, a really difficult
• 25:43
  Speaker 3: thing for people to do, is disassociate who they are
• 25:46
  Speaker 3: and what their values are from the thing that they do.
• 25:49
  Speaker 2: Was that hard for you at first?
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: Absolutely? You know, especially with athletes, our worth is tied
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: to our performance. Our identity is tied to a sport.
• 25:58
  Speaker 1: And you know, some teach my son and teach the
• 26:01
  Speaker 1: kids now that I had to learn. You know, sports
• 26:03
  Speaker 1: is what you do, it is not who you are.
• 26:05
  Speaker 1: You know, your worth should never be tied to something external.
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: That's everybody like even now, I don't. It's hard, but
• 26:11
  Speaker 1: I don't tie my worth to social media. I don't
• 26:13
  Speaker 1: tie my worth to you know, rehab time like at all.
• 26:16
  Speaker 1: I tie my worth to who I was created to
• 26:18
  Speaker 1: be internally. And so I think it's tough, but you
• 26:21
  Speaker 1: have to do that because if you don't, when you
• 26:23
  Speaker 1: lose that, you will lose yourself. Like no, hands down,
• 26:26
  Speaker 1: you will lose yourself. So I wut to everybody listening
• 26:30
  Speaker 1: right now is just like who are you without it?
• 26:32
  Speaker 1: Like strip the way of everything? Who are you at
• 26:35
  Speaker 1: your core? And you know, pay attention to that and
• 26:37
  Speaker 1: really do that internal work.
• 26:41
  Speaker 3: Yeah, And I think that's hard because for some people
• 26:43
  Speaker 3: to like do that work, they hear that phrase, they're.
• 26:45
  Speaker 2: Like, Okay, I've got to do the work.
• 26:47
  Speaker 3: But then they like sit down, They're like, where the
• 26:49
  Speaker 3: hell am I supposed to start?
• 26:50
  Speaker 2: Like what work? Do I need? A notebook?
• 26:52
  Speaker 3: Do I need? Like should I watch a specific video
• 26:54
  Speaker 3: that's going to tell me how to.
• 26:55
  Speaker 2: Do the work?
• 26:56
  Speaker 3: Like I'm sure people are asking you all the time,
• 26:58
  Speaker 3: like what does that eat me?
• 27:03
  Speaker 4: Absolutely?
• 27:04
  Speaker 1: So I think it's asking yourself a set of questions, right,
• 27:08
  Speaker 1: And the first question that I feel like is.
• 27:12
  Speaker 4: Again, who am I? Like? Without nothing, like, without anything external?
• 27:18
  Speaker 4: Who are you?
• 27:18
  Speaker 1: And this is kind of weird, but I always picture
• 27:20
  Speaker 1: myself like if nobody existed in this world, like nobody,
• 27:25
  Speaker 1: like who would I be?
• 27:26
  Speaker 4: Right?
• 27:26
  Speaker 1: If nobody was there to validate me, nobody was there
• 27:28
  Speaker 1: to know likes on, so like who would I be?
• 27:31
  Speaker 1: And so you have to have that conversation with yourself.
• 27:33
  Speaker 1: And that's not a one day conversation, by the way.
• 27:35
  Speaker 1: I'm still having that conversation, by the way. I think
• 27:37
  Speaker 1: it's a journey. And then two is like like what
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: truly matters to you? You know, I don't know if
• 27:43
  Speaker 1: like we spend enough time as human beings like really
• 27:47
  Speaker 1: understanding like what truly matters and what's going to matter
• 27:51
  Speaker 1: at the end of the day. And you know, like
• 27:53
  Speaker 1: situations like my mom is going through and then you know,
• 27:55
  Speaker 1: my college roommate one of my best friends come in suicide,
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: Like it makes me think, are lose my grandparents?
• 28:01
  Speaker 4: Right?
• 28:01
  Speaker 1: It makes me think, like what life is truly about?
• 28:04
  Speaker 1: And I think you've got to have those conversations with
• 28:05
  Speaker 1: yourself and get clarity on you know, what is truly
• 28:09
  Speaker 1: going to matter, what truly matters to you. And I
• 28:12
  Speaker 1: think that's where success is because success to me is fulfillment.
• 28:15
  Speaker 1: It's it's not a status. It's not money, it's not
• 28:19
  Speaker 1: you know, followers, it's not it's cloud, it's not none
• 28:22
  Speaker 1: of that. It's literally for me, it's fulfillment, like what
• 28:24
  Speaker 1: truly fulfills me. And I think when you get clear
• 28:27
  Speaker 1: on that, I think life becomes a little bit easier
• 28:30
  Speaker 1: for sure.
• 28:31
  Speaker 4: For sure.
• 28:31
  Speaker 3: I mean you've touched on so many different hurdle moments already,
• 28:35
  Speaker 3: from leaving the NFL and picking yourself up and pivoting
• 28:38
  Speaker 3: careers to you just mentioned the loss of your good
• 28:41
  Speaker 3: friend in these really hard times. What is it that
• 28:45
  Speaker 3: you go to to pick yourself back up off the ground.
• 28:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, So it's for me. I mean, for one, it's
• 28:54
  Speaker 1: my faith. You know, my faith is everything to me.
• 28:58
  Speaker 1: You know, that's one thing, and I know a lot
• 28:59
  Speaker 1: of even can relate to that. But also it's it's
• 29:03
  Speaker 1: just the mission like even now, like you know, I'll
• 29:07
  Speaker 1: just be transparent, like I'm I'm probably it was like
• 29:11
  Speaker 1: probably December November January, like the hardest time of my life.
• 29:16
  Speaker 4: Like I was depressed, like and people.
• 29:18
  Speaker 1: And it's hard because you know, you have to be
• 29:20
  Speaker 1: something for the world right still while you're going through
• 29:23
  Speaker 1: it yourself. But for me, I'm not afraid to turn off, right,
• 29:26
  Speaker 1: I'm not afraid to disconnect and talk about it often
• 29:28
  Speaker 1: disconnect from the world. And so I had to do
• 29:30
  Speaker 1: that because you know, with my mom's situation, it's been tough.
• 29:32
  Speaker 1: I gain probably twenty five thirty pounds. I stepped on
• 29:35
  Speaker 1: the scale the other day. I was like, dang, you know,
• 29:36
  Speaker 1: and I was like, man, and I don't judge myself
• 29:39
  Speaker 1: for that, but I know, okay, cool, it's time to
• 29:41
  Speaker 1: snap back into it. But what pulled me through, like
• 29:44
  Speaker 1: the tug boat that pulled me through, was mission. Was
• 29:48
  Speaker 1: the mission that I set out to do, and remembering
• 29:50
  Speaker 1: why I started remembering the the I don't like to
• 29:53
  Speaker 1: use the word promise because that's what words. But the
• 29:55
  Speaker 1: commitment that I made to my friend that killed itself,
• 29:58
  Speaker 1: the commitment that I made to my mother, the commitment
• 30:01
  Speaker 1: that I made to my community. You know what I'm saying,
• 30:03
  Speaker 1: And it's okay. To go through these moments, like I
• 30:05
  Speaker 1: want to be clear about that because you hear people
• 30:07
  Speaker 1: talk about, you know, be strong, and you think that
• 30:10
  Speaker 1: that means like, Okay, I can't go through moments or
• 30:12
  Speaker 1: I can't go through times where it hurts. No, it's
• 30:14
  Speaker 1: okay to not be okay, but it's not okay to
• 30:16
  Speaker 1: stay that way. And so I gave myself the permission
• 30:19
  Speaker 1: to go through what I was going through. And what
• 30:22
  Speaker 1: helped me Also, I know this is probably like I
• 30:25
  Speaker 1: added on to the question, but what helped me was
• 30:28
  Speaker 1: learn how to live live in appreciation and not regret,
• 30:31
  Speaker 1: because I think when you're in regret, it's like poison
• 30:35
  Speaker 1: to your soul and you're basically trying to do something
• 30:38
  Speaker 1: about something you can't do nothing about. And so I
• 30:40
  Speaker 1: switched it to appreciation to find appreciation in my struggle,
• 30:43
  Speaker 1: a gratitude in my struggle, and that helped me to
• 30:46
  Speaker 1: be able to focus on my mission and pull myself through.
• 30:48
  Speaker 3: We referenced the fifteen million social reach for you. Has
• 30:52
  Speaker 3: there been a time before We keep going into your
• 30:55
  Speaker 3: backstory where you have struggled with dealing with the approval
• 31:00
  Speaker 3: of others. I can't even imagine you know as that
• 31:03
  Speaker 3: ten becomes a hundred, becomes a thousand, becomes one hundred thousand,
• 31:06
  Speaker 3: becomes millions, It's like, does that ever become kind of
• 31:09
  Speaker 3: a dangerous cycle or has that for you?
• 31:12
  Speaker 1: It was at a point because again I'm introverted, like,
• 31:16
  Speaker 1: you know, the significance piece doesn't like for me. And
• 31:20
  Speaker 1: maybe it's because I went through sports like almost like
• 31:23
  Speaker 1: Biggie said, more money, more problems. I always say more followers,
• 31:25
  Speaker 1: more problems, right, And it's just like because it's a lot,
• 31:28
  Speaker 1: and I don't like a picture like I'm the guy
• 31:30
  Speaker 1: like super Bowl like we had nobody at the house,
• 31:32
  Speaker 1: you know, not because I'm anti social. I'm just like
• 31:35
  Speaker 1: I just like protecting my piece. And so yeah, that's
• 31:38
  Speaker 1: been tough for me because you know, I'm not an
• 31:40
  Speaker 1: A list celebrity, but you know, people know who I am,
• 31:43
  Speaker 1: and it's kind of like, you know, it's kind of hard.
• 31:46
  Speaker 1: But I say all that to say so I made
• 31:48
  Speaker 1: a spoken word. It's called pick me apart, and I
• 31:51
  Speaker 1: made it like in twenty fourteen fifteen, and that was
• 31:53
  Speaker 1: the time where I was kind of going through like
• 31:55
  Speaker 1: dang like approval like people like Trent, You're not Christian enough,
• 32:00
  Speaker 1: if you're too Christian, you talk about this, you talk
• 32:02
  Speaker 1: about like people are just picking me apart right with
• 32:04
  Speaker 1: my messages. And I just came to a point where
• 32:06
  Speaker 1: I was like, the first step to being unhappy is
• 32:08
  Speaker 1: trying to please everyone else. So I made a decision
• 32:11
  Speaker 1: to say, I'm not gonna I'm not gonna live my
• 32:13
  Speaker 1: life pleasing people. You know, I'm gonna live my life
• 32:16
  Speaker 1: doing what I feel is right in my heart to do.
• 32:18
  Speaker 1: And whether you approve it or not, where you agree
• 32:20
  Speaker 1: with it or not, that's not my concern. I know
• 32:23
  Speaker 1: that I'm not putting out anything negative or disrespectful, but
• 32:25
  Speaker 1: I refuse to lose myself to please a following because
• 32:31
  Speaker 1: at the end of the day, and I've told my
• 32:32
  Speaker 1: following this, like, at the end of the day, I
• 32:34
  Speaker 1: know that when I'm at my rock bottom, some of
• 32:37
  Speaker 1: y'all might be there, Like I understand that, but I'm
• 32:41
  Speaker 1: gonna be dealing with it, and so I don't want
• 32:43
  Speaker 1: to see her and lose myself for any type of
• 32:45
  Speaker 1: approval of the world. And so, and I'm gonna be
• 32:48
  Speaker 1: honest with you like that probably I could probably be
• 32:52
  Speaker 1: ten times more successful than what I am right now
• 32:54
  Speaker 1: in the world's eyes, right, but often think that, yeah,
• 32:57
  Speaker 1: I might be more successful in the world's eyes, but
• 32:58
  Speaker 1: I wouldn't have more peace in my life.
• 33:01
  Speaker 4: And so I'm willing to disconnect and say no a lot.
• 33:06
  Speaker 3: I think also like coming back to your foundation and
• 33:08
  Speaker 3: your values and again knowing what you said, which is
• 33:11
  Speaker 3: like you know that you have no ill intention and
• 33:14
  Speaker 3: to firmly understand and believe that is so important into
• 33:19
  Speaker 3: just like going on and continuing to do good. I remember,
• 33:23
  Speaker 3: like back in the pandemic, when you know so many
• 33:25
  Speaker 3: people are just like looking for help and they look
• 33:28
  Speaker 3: to you and they want you to be like their guru,
• 33:31
  Speaker 3: right like they want you to serve every bucket for them.
• 33:34
  Speaker 3: And I felt this way as well, with a like
• 33:36
  Speaker 3: minuscule like drop in the bucket of a following compared
• 33:39
  Speaker 3: to yours. But it was just like I had to say,
• 33:41
  Speaker 3: one day, listen, like you have a doctor, a physical therapist,
• 33:45
  Speaker 3: a therapist, like a massage person, like someone that comes
• 33:49
  Speaker 3: and cleans your house. If you have this whole group
• 33:51
  Speaker 3: of people that you work with regularly, I will never
• 33:54
  Speaker 3: be every single one of those people for you ever.
• 33:57
  Speaker 3: And once I like said that out loud and was like, wow,
• 34:01
  Speaker 3: like I need to take some of this pressure off
• 34:03
  Speaker 3: myself because it's we put this pressure here because we
• 34:06
  Speaker 3: want to help. You know, like you want to help people,
• 34:09
  Speaker 3: but you have to understand that, like you can't be
• 34:11
  Speaker 3: everything for someone. You can just do the best you
• 34:14
  Speaker 3: can with what you have to like, help in whatever
• 34:16
  Speaker 3: way feels right for you.
• 34:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it doesn't make you a bad person for doing
• 34:21
  Speaker 1: what's good for you. You know, it doesn't make you a
• 34:23
  Speaker 1: bad person to say no. And you're exactly right, Like,
• 34:27
  Speaker 1: I think taking that firm stance, it's what's needed a
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: lot and setting firm boundaries to say, Like, that'st thing
• 34:32
  Speaker 1: I tell people all the time when people say, turn
• 34:34
  Speaker 1: you change my life. I'm not a life changer, I'm not.
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: I don't want the credit. You know, I'm a seed
• 34:39
  Speaker 1: planner because I might not be there for you when
• 34:41
  Speaker 1: you need me. You know, you might hit my inbox
• 34:42
  Speaker 1: and I might not see it. And so you need
• 34:45
  Speaker 1: to be able to develop tools yourself. I'm trying to
• 34:48
  Speaker 1: teach you how to catch your fish, right. I'm not
• 34:50
  Speaker 1: going to keep showing you like I want to give you.
• 34:52
  Speaker 1: I don't want to enable you.
• 34:53
  Speaker 4: I want to.
• 34:53
  Speaker 1: I want you to be able to Like I had
• 34:55
  Speaker 1: a person tell me this and it was the biggest compliment,
• 34:57
  Speaker 1: and I think they thought they offended me and said, Trent, like,
• 35:00
  Speaker 1: I feel like I've outgrew your content, and I was like, awesome, great,
• 35:04
  Speaker 1: Like it means that you've actually like progressed through it.
• 35:08
  Speaker 1: Like I don't want you watching the same videos thirty times,
• 35:11
  Speaker 1: you know, I want you to be able to say, Okay,
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: I learned it, I applauded, I changed my situation. So
• 35:17
  Speaker 1: I'm in it for people to grow, not to just
• 35:19
  Speaker 1: you know, stay the same.
• 35:21
  Speaker 3: The question is, though, were they kind when they told
• 35:24
  Speaker 3: you that they agree your content? Were they looking for
• 35:26
  Speaker 3: more from you?
• 35:27
  Speaker 4: No, they were kind.
• 35:29
  Speaker 1: They actually didn't want to say it, but they still
• 35:31
  Speaker 1: digested the content.
• 35:32
  Speaker 4: And I was like, no, that's good.
• 35:33
  Speaker 1: So I don't know if they wanted I don't know,
• 35:35
  Speaker 1: maybe they did want a different response, but I was like,
• 35:37
  Speaker 1: that's great.
• 35:37
  Speaker 3: Like cool, you you established rehab time, you're getting into
• 35:42
  Speaker 3: this groove. You're like hosting these like conference calls with
• 35:45
  Speaker 3: thousands of people. When do you start to get a
• 35:48
  Speaker 3: really serious understanding of like kind of the trajectory that
• 35:52
  Speaker 3: you're on.
• 35:53
  Speaker 4: Yeah, so man, that's a tough question.
• 35:57
  Speaker 1: So I think there were different pockets where I realized like, okay,
• 36:01
  Speaker 1: this is this is like crazy. So one was like
• 36:05
  Speaker 1: people hitting me up that I know that was like, yeah,
• 36:08
  Speaker 1: my cousin just shared you. I'm like, that's trep like
• 36:10
  Speaker 1: I like and it was like my cousin just shared
• 36:12
  Speaker 1: you in Utah or something like that. So when I
• 36:14
  Speaker 1: started getting people like that they knew me was saying
• 36:16
  Speaker 1: like people that you know, they were close to or
• 36:18
  Speaker 1: they knew was sharing my content. So that was one
• 36:21
  Speaker 1: and then also the other two things was you know
• 36:23
  Speaker 1: me first going out the country was like real for
• 36:26
  Speaker 1: me because for one, it made me realize like how
• 36:29
  Speaker 1: small minded my vision was. And you know, we often
• 36:32
  Speaker 1: project like our goals based upon our current circumstances and
• 36:36
  Speaker 1: we limit ourselves and so that taught me that I
• 36:38
  Speaker 1: was like, man, there's a way bigger world.
• 36:40
  Speaker 4: Than my world that I'm currently living in.
• 36:42
  Speaker 1: So when I went to Sweden, this was my first
• 36:44
  Speaker 1: time out to coming, it was sweeten At all places,
• 36:46
  Speaker 1: I was like, I'm in Sweden. This is crazy, like
• 36:48
  Speaker 1: speaking on stages and I remember me being in my
• 36:50
  Speaker 1: room and another thing would probably be people putting me
• 36:54
  Speaker 1: in the same phrases of people I looked up to,
• 36:56
  Speaker 1: Like I like the first one was probably like it
• 36:58
  Speaker 1: was a list and it was like top fifty. It
• 37:02
  Speaker 1: was something like we can probably google it or so
• 37:04
  Speaker 1: I forgot the title. It was like Oprah on there.
• 37:08
  Speaker 1: It was like all these people and my name was
• 37:10
  Speaker 1: I'm like, what, this is crazy? You know, It's like
• 37:13
  Speaker 1: so those were the moments where I start to realize, like, Okay,
• 37:15
  Speaker 1: this is really making the impact.
• 37:18
  Speaker 2: I love that. I love that.
• 37:19
  Speaker 3: Okay, So you also, before we're talking about like protecting
• 37:22
  Speaker 3: your piece and also probably a byproduct of that, protecting
• 37:26
  Speaker 3: your worth, talk to me about where you sit on
• 37:30
  Speaker 3: the importance of protecting your worth and do you have
• 37:33
  Speaker 3: any suggestions or tips that you can offer to someone
• 37:36
  Speaker 3: who is just feeling like I just don't know what
• 37:39
  Speaker 3: I have to offer and having trouble standing on their
• 37:42
  Speaker 3: own two feet.
• 37:43
  Speaker 1: Absolutely, So, man, I can break this down for an hour. So, like,
• 37:47
  Speaker 1: I love talking about word. It's actually gonna be my
• 37:48
  Speaker 1: next one. And this is the first time I've said it,
• 37:50
  Speaker 1: So it's coming. I don't know when it's coming, but
• 37:52
  Speaker 1: my next book will be over worth. I don't know
• 37:54
  Speaker 1: what I'm gonna call it, but it's gonna be overworth.
• 37:56
  Speaker 1: And I break down worth in two things.
• 37:58
  Speaker 4: Right.
• 37:58
  Speaker 1: Worth is the accept of self and it's the confidence
• 38:01
  Speaker 1: of self. So if you had like two pillars, it
• 38:03
  Speaker 1: would be those two things. I betted a lot of
• 38:06
  Speaker 1: people and it came down to those two things, like
• 38:07
  Speaker 1: they didn't accept themselves, whether their past or their flaws,
• 38:10
  Speaker 1: or they weren't confident in who they are. And so
• 38:12
  Speaker 1: I spent a whole bunch of time breaking that down.
• 38:14
  Speaker 1: But I wanted to share that because the more confident
• 38:16
  Speaker 1: you are in yourself, and confidence comes from proving yourself right, right,
• 38:20
  Speaker 1: doing certain things, going out and you know, having a
• 38:22
  Speaker 1: vision of a podcast and actually doing it, and you
• 38:24
  Speaker 1: keep proving yourself right or proven yourself wrong wherever mindset
• 38:28
  Speaker 1: you're in. That builds confidence and acceptances you saying, you
• 38:31
  Speaker 1: know what, this is who I am. I'm not going
• 38:33
  Speaker 1: to allow opinions in the world to change who I am, right,
• 38:36
  Speaker 1: And that's when you really start to know your worth
• 38:38
  Speaker 1: and you know yourself. A practical thing that I do
• 38:42
  Speaker 1: is and I've said this before and people kind of
• 38:45
  Speaker 1: look at me weird when I say it, but understanding
• 38:48
  Speaker 1: from one's setting boundaries and your principles right, the things
• 38:52
  Speaker 1: that you stand on no matter what. Like that's very
• 38:56
  Speaker 1: important because like you said, you can have people into
• 38:59
  Speaker 1: your life. And this is what And I'm not trying
• 39:01
  Speaker 1: to tell people to build a wall because you know,
• 39:04
  Speaker 1: if you keep people out, you'll also keep people from
• 39:06
  Speaker 1: getting in. But it's like, always think about this, man,
• 39:09
  Speaker 1: you can allow one person in your life and they
• 39:11
  Speaker 1: can ruin your life, because I've seen it plenty of
• 39:13
  Speaker 1: times from just different people's stories, Like, man, you let
• 39:15
  Speaker 1: this person in. So I was like, you got to
• 39:17
  Speaker 1: have principles that you stand on that your feelings don't
• 39:21
  Speaker 1: make you switch on your principles. I always say facts
• 39:23
  Speaker 1: or feelings. Feelings are real, but feelings aren't always right.
• 39:25
  Speaker 1: And so the quote that I say that people kind
• 39:28
  Speaker 1: of looking at me funny. I said, I'm not loyal
• 39:29
  Speaker 1: to people. I'm loyal to my principles because the people
• 39:32
  Speaker 1: that deserve my loyalty will respect my principles. And so
• 39:34
  Speaker 1: my principles make my decisions. So whatever principle you have,
• 39:38
  Speaker 1: that's for love, whatever whatever you have, that's what you
• 39:41
  Speaker 1: stand on. So if nobody if a person's not giving
• 39:44
  Speaker 1: you that, then you got to say principles say nah,
• 39:46
  Speaker 1: this ain't for my life. Or if it's for your
• 39:48
  Speaker 1: business and you know your work, right, the principal say
• 39:50
  Speaker 1: you know what, I deserve this. You stand on that,
• 39:52
  Speaker 1: and you say you know what, they make the decisions.
• 39:54
  Speaker 1: So I always say, it's easy for me to make decisions,
• 39:57
  Speaker 1: easy for me to cut people out my life, if
• 40:00
  Speaker 1: that's a proper word to say, when my principles make
• 40:03
  Speaker 1: those decisions for me. So I think people should just
• 40:06
  Speaker 1: get very clear on the principles and values that they
• 40:09
  Speaker 1: have in their life and just realize, like, don't allow
• 40:11
  Speaker 1: feelings to make you sway from those values and principles.
• 40:14
  Speaker 3: I also think, like something to touch on here that
• 40:17
  Speaker 3: feels kind of right is this idea of making choices
• 40:21
  Speaker 3: or doing things just to make other people happy, because
• 40:25
  Speaker 3: you're like, well, if my people are happy, then I'm
• 40:27
  Speaker 3: going to be happy.
• 40:28
  Speaker 1: Other people's happiness should not equal with your misery, like
• 40:31
  Speaker 1: straight up, like, if you're living life to please people,
• 40:34
  Speaker 1: then you will be empty at some point, you know.
• 40:37
  Speaker 1: I always say, like, and it's not selfish, like the
• 40:40
  Speaker 1: world will make you think that, like manipular people will
• 40:43
  Speaker 1: make you think that it's selfish for you taking care
• 40:45
  Speaker 1: of you. I tell people all the time, like, I
• 40:47
  Speaker 1: take care of me because I want to be the
• 40:49
  Speaker 1: best me for those that need me to be. So
• 40:51
  Speaker 1: if me taking care of me says I don't want
• 40:54
  Speaker 1: to be around this environment anymore, I don't care how
• 40:56
  Speaker 1: you feel about it, because I know who I need
• 40:59
  Speaker 1: to be for my environ but in my world, and
• 41:01
  Speaker 1: so I would rather be viewed as cold hearted than
• 41:05
  Speaker 1: live broken hearted. So people say, trick, you're cold hearted.
• 41:08
  Speaker 1: And I know I'm not cold hearted person, like I
• 41:09
  Speaker 1: get people multiple chances and things. But I'll rather be
• 41:12
  Speaker 1: viewed as that because that's what people go to when
• 41:14
  Speaker 1: you say no. Right when you say no, they'll talk
• 41:18
  Speaker 1: about you. They'll make you feel like you're the bad person.
• 41:20
  Speaker 1: They'll tell the people about you and say, oh, you know,
• 41:22
  Speaker 1: trench changed, or he's done this or he's done that. Well,
• 41:26
  Speaker 1: all I've done was what they would do if they
• 41:28
  Speaker 1: were in my shoes. And so I tell people I
• 41:29
  Speaker 1: would rather be viewed as cold hearted then live broken hearted.
• 41:32
  Speaker 1: I refuse to get to the end of my life
• 41:34
  Speaker 1: and realize that I've settled for less. My whole entire
• 41:37
  Speaker 1: life to make other people happy that could care less
• 41:39
  Speaker 1: about me anywhere.
• 41:47
  Speaker 3: Popping into today's episode to give some love to my
• 41:50
  Speaker 3: friends at Gooder. Gooder makes no balance, no scratch, polarized
• 41:55
  Speaker 3: sunglasses that start at just twenty five dollars. They make
• 42:00
  Speaker 3: a ton of really adorable styles. I am big on
• 42:03
  Speaker 3: their blackout monk G's, which are perfect for both picking
• 42:07
  Speaker 3: up the pace of the track or just wearing to brunch.
• 42:10
  Speaker 2: But they have shapes and styles for every taste.
• 42:13
  Speaker 3: They come with a one year warranty, thirty day free
• 42:16
  Speaker 3: it returns, and are one hundred percent carbon neutral.
• 42:20
  Speaker 2: You have got to get in on the Gooder game today.
• 42:24
  Speaker 3: Head on over to Gooder dot com slash hurdle and
• 42:27
  Speaker 3: use the code Hurdle at checkout for ten dollars off
• 42:30
  Speaker 3: your purchase today. I already told you starting at just
• 42:32
  Speaker 3: twenty five dollars, this is a no brainer.
• 42:35
  Speaker 2: Again.
• 42:36
  Speaker 3: That is Gooder dot com, goodr dot com slash hurdle.
• 42:41
  Speaker 3: Use Hurdle at checkout for ten dollars off your purchase today.
• 42:53
  Speaker 3: And I think that's really hard because sometimes it feels
• 42:55
  Speaker 3: like you're kind of stuck in a certain situation where
• 42:58
  Speaker 3: either it's like maybe a little bit emotionally abusive, whether
• 43:02
  Speaker 3: it's a friend or a partnership, but you feel like
• 43:04
  Speaker 3: you're stuck in this situation because it could be all
• 43:08
  Speaker 3: you know or it's familiar, and getting out of that
• 43:11
  Speaker 3: and like doing the things that make you happy and
• 43:14
  Speaker 3: give back to your soul can literally feel completely impossible
• 43:18
  Speaker 3: because you don't know what to do.
• 43:20
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, we're so afraid of the unknown, you know.
• 43:25
  Speaker 1: We would rather stand in familiar pain than move to
• 43:27
  Speaker 1: an unknown peace.
• 43:29
  Speaker 4: You know.
• 43:29
  Speaker 1: I had somebody tell me years ago that they would
• 43:30
  Speaker 1: rather accept a little than nothing at all. And so
• 43:34
  Speaker 1: for me, I would rather have nothing at all than
• 43:36
  Speaker 1: a little. If you only gonn give me a little
• 43:37
  Speaker 1: bit of loyalty, a little bit or whatever, I rather
• 43:39
  Speaker 1: have none of it at all because I just refuse
• 43:41
  Speaker 1: to settle. Like that's one of my principles, never settles,
• 43:43
  Speaker 1: one of my messages. I just refuse to settle because
• 43:46
  Speaker 1: I know that settling leads to suffering. It's going to
• 43:48
  Speaker 1: happen at some point in your life, in all aspects
• 43:50
  Speaker 1: of your life. You have to be able to willing
• 43:52
  Speaker 1: to take that journey. And this is the thing, you know,
• 43:54
  Speaker 1: when people be able to say trend it is hard.
• 43:56
  Speaker 1: I was like, it is hard, but choose your heart,
• 44:00
  Speaker 1: standing in the pain, whatever that pain is for you
• 44:02
  Speaker 1: for the rest of your life. That's hard. That's a heart.
• 44:06
  Speaker 1: It doesn't change. So I would rather remove myself move
• 44:10
  Speaker 1: on from a situation that's gonna be tough. It's not
• 44:12
  Speaker 1: gonna be easy because you're leaving something that's familiar or
• 44:14
  Speaker 1: you know, even if it's letting go of a sport.
• 44:16
  Speaker 1: You know, letting go of football was tough. So I'm
• 44:18
  Speaker 1: trying to find myself in the journey. But I knew
• 44:21
  Speaker 1: that at least at least the unknown, Like I know
• 44:25
  Speaker 1: what it is to be over here and stay with
• 44:26
  Speaker 1: this and hold on to this. So why not go
• 44:29
  Speaker 1: on this journey. The worst that can happen is, you know,
• 44:33
  Speaker 1: what I think is gonna happen doesn't happen. And I
• 44:35
  Speaker 1: would rather take that chance to stand into something that
• 44:37
  Speaker 1: I know for sure it's gonna hurt my life. And
• 44:39
  Speaker 1: so I would rather always move into the unknown and
• 44:41
  Speaker 1: standing known pain.
• 44:43
  Speaker 3: We're talking about journeys here. Talk to me about your
• 44:46
  Speaker 3: journey as a dad.
• 44:50
  Speaker 1: It started twelve years ago and it was a surprise
• 44:54
  Speaker 1: when it started twelve years ago. You know, it wasn't
• 44:55
  Speaker 1: it wasn't playing. And you know Tristan, that's my twelve
• 44:58
  Speaker 1: year old son. You know, he changed my life, like
• 45:01
  Speaker 1: I tell people all the time, you know, he he
• 45:03
  Speaker 1: changed my life as a man, Like he made me
• 45:05
  Speaker 1: want to be a better human being, knowing that I
• 45:07
  Speaker 1: have somebody that's going to follow my footsteps, Like knowing
• 45:10
  Speaker 1: that I'm a leader now and people out there that
• 45:12
  Speaker 1: don't have kids, you're a leader regardless. You know, somebody
• 45:14
  Speaker 1: somewhere sometimes watching what you do, your influence to someone.
• 45:17
  Speaker 1: And so I was now a conscious leader. So he
• 45:19
  Speaker 1: made me want to like get right, you know, just
• 45:22
  Speaker 1: with the values that I lived in the rold that
• 45:26
  Speaker 1: I knew I was going to leave for him legacy.
• 45:28
  Speaker 1: And then you know, fast forward to twenty sixteen. You know,
• 45:32
  Speaker 1: I have a daughter, Maya, and now I have Marley
• 45:35
  Speaker 1: that was born in twenty nineteen.
• 45:36
  Speaker 4: And my girls.
• 45:37
  Speaker 1: You know, they changed my life too. You know, they
• 45:39
  Speaker 1: made me more you know, I grew up around all boys,
• 45:41
  Speaker 1: you know, so they made me a lot more sensitive,
• 45:44
  Speaker 1: a lot more just loving and cared and it's just
• 45:46
  Speaker 1: a different vibe. And you know, I always say for me.
• 45:51
  Speaker 1: Success is this house. You know, I don't want to
• 45:55
  Speaker 1: be the guy that's praise to the world, but I
• 45:57
  Speaker 1: walk in here, my kids can't stand me. Are I
• 46:00
  Speaker 1: don't want to be the guy that you know, it's
• 46:02
  Speaker 1: pleasing the world, but not spending time with my world.
• 46:05
  Speaker 1: And so I make a lot of sacrifice because their
• 46:09
  Speaker 1: opinion matters to me, you know, not the world, not
• 46:12
  Speaker 1: the followers. Their opinion matters to me first, you know,
• 46:15
  Speaker 1: my household. And I think, you know, we got to
• 46:18
  Speaker 1: get back to that foundation to be able to you know,
• 46:21
  Speaker 1: culptivate better family, so we can have better communities, so
• 46:24
  Speaker 1: we can you know, have better world.
• 46:25
  Speaker 4: So I think it starts in the house.
• 46:27
  Speaker 3: I think also, like over the past year, with so
• 46:29
  Speaker 3: many more people being able to spend a little bit
• 46:32
  Speaker 3: more time at home and look at how I spun
• 46:34
  Speaker 3: that as a positive instead of a negative, they have
• 46:37
  Speaker 3: had the chance to kind of go back to those foundations.
• 46:40
  Speaker 3: What has been a big lesson for you over the
• 46:43
  Speaker 3: past year, because I'm sure, without a doubt, you're traveling
• 46:47
  Speaker 3: much much less than you used to.
• 46:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, oh man, you know, outside of like being home
• 46:59
  Speaker 1: or like the piece, you know, I can't even talk
• 47:01
  Speaker 1: about that, Like, I just appreciate them. I said, I
• 47:04
  Speaker 1: don't want to travel because some people see this like truth,
• 47:05
  Speaker 1: it's not traveling, But it just feels good to be
• 47:09
  Speaker 1: able to do this connect right and then be able
• 47:12
  Speaker 1: to like be with my family right after this. And
• 47:15
  Speaker 1: so it just made me realize just the importance of time.
• 47:19
  Speaker 1: Like we've heard this supported a million times. You know,
• 47:21
  Speaker 1: kids spell love time, and it's so true to be
• 47:24
  Speaker 1: able to to be able to sit there and listen
• 47:27
  Speaker 1: because as parents, we always think that we're teaching the kid.
• 47:29
  Speaker 1: But if you sit there and listen, the kids will
• 47:31
  Speaker 1: teach you. You know, they will teach you how to
• 47:33
  Speaker 1: be a better mom, a better father, a better human
• 47:35
  Speaker 1: being just by watching them interact. Like when my daughter's
• 47:38
  Speaker 1: friend comes over here, it's so it's so cute and
• 47:41
  Speaker 1: funny because they'll be angry at each other, like because
• 47:44
  Speaker 1: they you know, somebody wants to play with this and
• 47:46
  Speaker 1: somebody wants to play with that. Then literally two minutes later,
• 47:49
  Speaker 1: they'll be friends again, and it's like they forgave each
• 47:52
  Speaker 1: other just like that, they moved on to a bigger purpose.
• 47:54
  Speaker 1: And so I just learned so much by just watching them,
• 47:57
  Speaker 1: you know, Marley, even her, you know, she's like sixteen
• 48:01
  Speaker 1: months and you know, just seeing her, you know, try
• 48:04
  Speaker 1: something and fail at it. Then she gets back up
• 48:06
  Speaker 1: and tries it again, and gets back up and tries
• 48:08
  Speaker 1: it again. She's determined. You know, you can learn a
• 48:11
  Speaker 1: lot from just kids and just a determination how they
• 48:15
  Speaker 1: love and how they show up. So that's one of
• 48:17
  Speaker 1: the bigger things that I've learned, is like being able
• 48:19
  Speaker 1: to be super present. Because with Tristan, you know, I
• 48:21
  Speaker 1: was still playing football, so I wasn't there for him
• 48:24
  Speaker 1: like as an infant like I would have liked to be.
• 48:26
  Speaker 1: And then Maya, you know, I was traveling a lot.
• 48:28
  Speaker 1: You know, I was there, but not as much as
• 48:30
  Speaker 1: I would like to be. And now with Marley, you know,
• 48:32
  Speaker 1: I'm here, you know, all the time. So it's just
• 48:34
  Speaker 1: a beautiful experience.
• 48:35
  Speaker 3: You mentioned the word forgiveness, and I think that's something
• 48:38
  Speaker 3: that we should rap about for just a second here,
• 48:41
  Speaker 3: because I think that's also a huge thing that people
• 48:45
  Speaker 3: struggle with, whether someone may have wronged them.
• 48:48
  Speaker 2: Intentionally or unintentionally.
• 48:51
  Speaker 3: Sometimes it's just hard to accept the facts and move
• 48:54
  Speaker 3: forward and actually forgive. So for someone that's struggling with that,
• 48:58
  Speaker 3: what kind of advice do you have for them?
• 49:00
  Speaker 1: Absolutely, So there's three things like when it comes to forgiveness,
• 49:03
  Speaker 1: at least two major ones, Like so one you have
• 49:06
  Speaker 1: to understand, I know people have heard this before, but
• 49:08
  Speaker 1: it's true. Forgiveness is for you, not for other persons.
• 49:10
  Speaker 1: And the thing that helps me forgive is like this
• 49:13
  Speaker 1: simple statement. Especially when somebody that's really hurt you and
• 49:18
  Speaker 1: did something wrong to you, I'm like, I want to
• 49:20
  Speaker 1: forgive because I refuse to give them the power to
• 49:23
  Speaker 1: control the rest of my life. Like if they hurt
• 49:25
  Speaker 1: my past so bad, I refuse to give them the
• 49:29
  Speaker 1: power to control my future. And if you don't forgive,
• 49:32
  Speaker 1: that's what they're doing. You know how many of us
• 49:35
  Speaker 1: and I've been here before where I became the pain
• 49:38
  Speaker 1: that someone else gave me because I didn't forgive them.
• 49:40
  Speaker 1: You know a perfect example, you know, I had a
• 49:42
  Speaker 1: situation I'm not gonna get into any days, had a
• 49:44
  Speaker 1: situation where, you know, a business situation that didn't go right,
• 49:48
  Speaker 1: you know, just to be honest, and it wasn't good.
• 49:50
  Speaker 1: And you know, some money like business stuff like wasn't
• 49:54
  Speaker 1: the money that was old to me wasn't given to me,
• 49:56
  Speaker 1: and it made me very very like sour because I'm
• 49:58
  Speaker 1: already protective and I'm like, man, like, I can't believe
• 50:01
  Speaker 1: I trusted this person to be able to do this.
• 50:03
  Speaker 4: I'm just trying to be a good person.
• 50:04
  Speaker 1: And so what it did was like it made me
• 50:07
  Speaker 1: like block off everybody, like I'm not working with nobody,
• 50:09
  Speaker 1: no opportunities come in, I'm shutting it down.
• 50:11
  Speaker 4: Nope, I don't work with nobody.
• 50:13
  Speaker 1: And what I was doing, which we do so often
• 50:15
  Speaker 1: when we don't forgive, is I was making people pay
• 50:20
  Speaker 1: for mistakes they didn't make right, and we do that
• 50:24
  Speaker 1: so much, like they don't deserve that. And I started
• 50:28
  Speaker 1: to realize, like dang, like I'm allowing this person to
• 50:31
  Speaker 1: control my life. Even though they're not a part of
• 50:33
  Speaker 1: my life, it's still controlling so much of it. So
• 50:35
  Speaker 1: I had to forgive that person. So kind of to
• 50:38
  Speaker 1: wrap this up, one is to understand, forgiveness is for you.
• 50:42
  Speaker 1: Two is understanding will help you forgive. What I mean
• 50:45
  Speaker 1: by that is putting yourself in their shoes for a moment.
• 50:48
  Speaker 1: You know, maybe they didn't have the structure that you
• 50:51
  Speaker 1: had growing up. Maybe they were in a tough situation,
• 50:53
  Speaker 1: and it doesn't make their behavior, right, it helps you understand.
• 50:56
  Speaker 1: When you understand more, it helps you be able to
• 50:59
  Speaker 1: give the forgiveness that you A last but not least
• 51:02
  Speaker 1: is just realizing that if you don't forgive, that situation
• 51:06
  Speaker 1: is going to control you the rest of your life
• 51:08
  Speaker 1: and so to turn you into a person that you
• 51:10
  Speaker 1: don't need to be cooked and so forgive. Man, you
• 51:13
  Speaker 1: don't want to be in a prison without being behind bars.
• 51:15
  Speaker 2: So true.
• 51:16
  Speaker 3: I also think like on that note of like you
• 51:18
  Speaker 3: start to realize that you're treating people a way that
• 51:21
  Speaker 3: like they don't deserve and they had nothing to do
• 51:23
  Speaker 3: with the thing that was causing you pain. It really
• 51:25
  Speaker 3: just makes me think about sitting at my desk like
• 51:27
  Speaker 3: every single day and that people are like popping into
• 51:29
  Speaker 3: my inbox taking out their problems on me when I
• 51:31
  Speaker 3: did not cause them no talk to me.
• 51:35
  Speaker 2: Then, I mean, now you are.
• 51:38
  Speaker 3: Well into your career doing public speaking, writing, and so
• 51:42
  Speaker 3: much more. When you reflect on give or take, you know,
• 51:46
  Speaker 3: the last eight ten years, what would you say has
• 51:49
  Speaker 3: been one of the best pieces of advice you have
• 51:52
  Speaker 3: been offered? Because I know you yourself are so used
• 51:56
  Speaker 3: to being the one giving it.
• 51:59
  Speaker 1: Man, that first popping into my heart. So I have
• 52:02
  Speaker 1: a friend the same, Zing Graziosi. He's well known in
• 52:06
  Speaker 1: the marketing world, and we became close. Like he's he's
• 52:09
  Speaker 1: older than me and think things like fifty fifty two
• 52:11
  Speaker 1: and uh, just has a lot of knowledge in different things.
• 52:14
  Speaker 1: And I remember telling me something that really stuck with me.
• 52:17
  Speaker 1: He was like, you want to stay in your unique ability?
• 52:22
  Speaker 1: And I was like, what do you mean by that?
• 52:23
  Speaker 1: He was like, man, you're doing so many things. Like
• 52:25
  Speaker 1: He's like, I know you want to do it all
• 52:26
  Speaker 1: by yourself, but you're doing so many things. Like just
• 52:29
  Speaker 1: imagine if you were able to really like build your
• 52:32
  Speaker 1: brand to where you know, you don't have to do
• 52:34
  Speaker 1: everything and you can actually focus on the thing that
• 52:37
  Speaker 1: you love to do. And so I made that my
• 52:39
  Speaker 1: mission to like really be able to build a brand
• 52:42
  Speaker 1: where I can stay in my unique ability so I
• 52:43
  Speaker 1: can be able to give, you know, my gift to
• 52:46
  Speaker 1: the world without being drained. And so I know that
• 52:49
  Speaker 1: might not be for everybody, but I think if people
• 52:51
  Speaker 1: can understand that, like when you can stay inside your
• 52:53
  Speaker 1: gift and not worry about everything else. And I know
• 52:55
  Speaker 1: it's a process, you know, you can't just do that
• 52:57
  Speaker 1: out the gate. That's always been my goal to be like,
• 52:59
  Speaker 1: what can I take away and delegate so I can
• 53:01
  Speaker 1: stay into serving mode and just give it mode.
• 53:03
  Speaker 3: What excites you right now, aside from the fact that
• 53:07
  Speaker 3: you're home a little bit more often with your family.
• 53:10
  Speaker 1: Well, what I'm currently building and so I'm building it's
• 53:13
  Speaker 1: called Rabried Academy, and uh, it's so much like it's
• 53:17
  Speaker 1: a whole academy, so much more than just online content.
• 53:20
  Speaker 1: We've actually started Raybree Youth Academy where it's actually sports performance.
• 53:24
  Speaker 1: So like I'm geeked out about that because I never
• 53:26
  Speaker 1: have got the chance to really put my hands on athletes.
• 53:29
  Speaker 1: I mean I've done it here and there, but never
• 53:31
  Speaker 1: really focused on it. So like, I'm super excited about
• 53:34
  Speaker 1: being able to like give kids, when I say kids,
• 53:37
  Speaker 1: you know, twelve, thirteen, fourteen, fifty year old or even
• 53:39
  Speaker 1: eight year old the actual tools not to just thrive
• 53:43
  Speaker 1: in sports, but actually to thrive in life. And so
• 53:45
  Speaker 1: I'm excited about that right now.
• 53:47
  Speaker 3: When someone goes to your personal Instagram page, they see
• 53:51
  Speaker 3: a guy with a hell of a lot of followers
• 53:54
  Speaker 3: talking to the camera a lot inspiring so many when
• 53:57
  Speaker 3: you look in the mirror.
• 53:59
  Speaker 2: What is it that you see looking back at you.
• 54:03
  Speaker 1: Man, Just a guy that wants to help lives as
• 54:08
  Speaker 1: he helps himself, A guy that doesn't have it all
• 54:10
  Speaker 1: figured out, a guy that has so many questions about life.
• 54:14
  Speaker 1: A guide that's on the journey to find the greatest
• 54:16
  Speaker 1: version of himself. And that's what I live life doing
• 54:19
  Speaker 1: and hopefully leave a legacy that other people can benefit
• 54:23
  Speaker 1: from and learn from, you know, from the perfections, the imperfections,
• 54:26
  Speaker 1: the rise, the falls, all of that. So I just
• 54:28
  Speaker 1: see a God that's transparent and wants to make the
• 54:30
  Speaker 1: world respect his greatness.
• 54:32
  Speaker 3: If I was just to give you the floor for
• 54:35
  Speaker 3: like thirty to sixty seconds here to share something that
• 54:38
  Speaker 3: you haven't shared just yet with the hurdlers as I
• 54:41
  Speaker 3: love to call them, What is it that you think
• 54:44
  Speaker 3: is important to leave them with as we close this
• 54:48
  Speaker 3: out here?
• 54:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so I would tell him that, you know, your
• 54:53
  Speaker 1: perspective is everything. Your perspective can need to be one
• 54:55
  Speaker 1: or two things, your power, your prison, and perspective is
• 54:58
  Speaker 1: everything in life. You know, how you see life. The
• 55:00
  Speaker 1: perspective is the window of how you see the world.
• 55:02
  Speaker 1: And I like to think of perspective as two sets
• 55:04
  Speaker 1: of glasses, and every time an experience happens, you have
• 55:07
  Speaker 1: the choice to pick up whatever set you want to
• 55:09
  Speaker 1: pick up. You know, something bad happens, you have a choice.
• 55:11
  Speaker 1: Something great happens, you have a choice. But oftentimes when
• 55:14
  Speaker 1: something bad happens, we pick up the prison perspective lenses
• 55:16
  Speaker 1: and we start to see everything is working against us,
• 55:18
  Speaker 1: everything is being a unfair when we can easily pick
• 55:21
  Speaker 1: up those power perspective and say, you know what, this
• 55:23
  Speaker 1: didn't go the way I wanted to go, but maybe
• 55:25
  Speaker 1: it's going the way that it's supposed to go.
• 55:26
  Speaker 4: For my life.
• 55:27
  Speaker 1: Now everything is happening for me, Everything is building me,
• 55:30
  Speaker 1: everything is power. So I want to tell you that
• 55:32
  Speaker 1: every single experience that you go through, there's two levels
• 55:34
  Speaker 1: of life. There's an experience that we all want experience,
• 55:37
  Speaker 1: but the deeper level. People know this that there's the
• 55:40
  Speaker 1: deeper level of experience, which means the meaning we give
• 55:42
  Speaker 1: to the experience. And if you want to live a
• 55:44
  Speaker 1: more meaningful life, develop more better meanings in life, and
• 55:47
  Speaker 1: you're always in control of that. So why not develop
• 55:51
  Speaker 1: a meaning that's going to help you instead of hurt you.
• 55:53
  Speaker 1: And honestly, that's been my secret sauce of how I've
• 55:56
  Speaker 1: been able to push through and grow through turbulent times,
• 55:59
  Speaker 1: through bad times, and just be consistent over this last decade.
• 56:03
  Speaker 3: Right now, you have an opportunity to offer the Trent
• 56:07
  Speaker 3: who is fresh out of the NFL a piece of advice.
• 56:12
  Speaker 3: Looking back at that hurdle moment right now, what do
• 56:16
  Speaker 3: you tell him?
• 56:17
  Speaker 1: I would tell myself to stop, to stop tripping, that
• 56:21
  Speaker 1: everything's going to be all right, and just know that
• 56:25
  Speaker 1: there's a greater plan than your playing for your life.
• 56:28
  Speaker 1: And just know that, you know, as long as you
• 56:31
  Speaker 1: stay committed, discipline, have consistency, faith and heart, your life
• 56:35
  Speaker 1: will arrive at the destination it's supposed to arrive at.
• 56:38
  Speaker 1: Everything has purpose, So stop trying to figure it out
• 56:41
  Speaker 1: and just control what you can control and just accept
• 56:45
  Speaker 1: you know what's coming for your life.
• 56:46
  Speaker 2: I appreciate you. Thank you so much for your time.
• 56:50
  Speaker 3: I'm sure a lot of your followers are already listening
• 56:53
  Speaker 3: to us right now, but for those that want to
• 56:55
  Speaker 3: keep up with you, give me all of your details.
• 56:58
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so just at Trent Shelton on all social media sites.
• 57:01
  Speaker 1: You know, I'm on Clubhouse now, you know. I know
• 57:03
  Speaker 1: that's like the fresh thing so and then trench shall
• 57:06
  Speaker 1: dot com is my website and that's about it. Actually, yeah,
• 57:09
  Speaker 1: you can text me so. I'm very big on my
• 57:12
  Speaker 1: text community. Like I said, out inspiration every day. It's
• 57:15
  Speaker 1: just eight one seven, two four two twenty seven nineteen
• 57:18
  Speaker 1: if you just want inspiration daily.
• 57:21
  Speaker 3: I am over at Emily a Bodi and at Hurdle
• 57:23
  Speaker 3: Podcast Another Hurdle Conquered. Catch you guys next time