Latest / Great Detectives of Old Time Radio Volume 2|Mystery Audio Dramas / That’s Rich: Income Tax (EP1556s)

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That’s Rich: Income Tax (EP1556s) · Great Detectives of Old Time Radio Volume 2|Mystery Audio Dramas

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Welcome to the Great Detectives of Old Time Radio from Boise, Idaho. This
0:34
is your host, Adam Graham. If you have a comment, email it
0:39
to me Box thirteen at Greatdetectives dot net, follow us on Twitter at Radio
0:44
Detectives, and become one of our friends on Facebook, Facebook, dot com
0:50
slash Radio Detectives. On April seventh, the great Stan Freeburg passed away at
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the age of eighty eight. Freeburg was a comedy and satire legend, as
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well as a radio Hall of Famer. Fans of old time radio of all
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genres all a bit of a debt to us Van Freeburg, who was the
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host of the ever popular When Radio Was program from nineteen ninety five to two
1:18
thousand and six. One thing that Freiberg did was his parody of Dragnets,
1:23
Saint George and the Dragonnet. For the years, I've had requests to play
1:29
that particular parody. However, that was made as a commercial recording and not
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something that was broadcast on radio, so I can't bring that to you like
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I do other old time radio programs. However, he did have a radio
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program that aired from January to September of nineteen fifty three. And in the
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course of that program he did a version of his famous dragnet parody. This
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is going to be a bit more comedy in a detective show. But in
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honor of mister Freiburg and his contributions to radio appreciation, we're making a bit
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of an exception to the rule. This program aired somehow most lastly in March
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of nineteen fifty four, and it's an episode of San Freiberg's radio sitcom That's
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Rich, and the title is income Tax. Well, this is income tax
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time. But if you owe the government more than you've got the real friendly
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about the whole thing, they let you pay as your goal. Of course,
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after you pay, where can you go? That's rip, Yes,
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that's Rich, Frank God's daring van Freeburg. Guys, Rich, we take
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you again to Hope Springs, California, that bustling little community just a stone's
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throw from the heart of Hollywood and the hall of Howard and Hazel Trump,
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where Hazel's fifty cousin, Richardy Will has living since his arrival in California.
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This is the dreaded Knight. When Howie does his income tax, he brings
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in his receipts for nineteen fifty three in an old shoe box, which he
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places on the dining room table. Hey, put your very in clear off
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this table. I've got my income tax to do tonight. Oh boy,
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let me out of here. I'm not happy You've got me help clean up.
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Let me warn you it how he turns into a monster when he's doing
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income tax. Ooh, sure, here's an enlightenment. The hope springs weekly.
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I thought to you might be innis. I'll read it. Federal income
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tax investigators have chosen this period to check are taxivators? Oh, that's just
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possibly with the hope of discouraging kizzling on the current return. That's standard.
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The town is said to be crawling with undercover federal tax investigators. That hair
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is just fine. They're crawling around when I'm making off my income tact.
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They're just after sizzlers. There. You are a chubler, are you da?
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Of course I'm not a chippler. Why are you, Willie? I'm
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not worry Look, I'm just trying to make out my chips, my income
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pact, that's all. Why are you taking off your glasses coming with I
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don't know. Suddenly my eyes kind of smart must be as smart. I'll
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be back to help you as soon as I get my cycle. Don't hurt.
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What are fike fapers? Let me taste papers for cleaning glasses only.
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Cousin rises use amount of glasses, he uses amount of his eyes? All
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happy? Oh, good night? Hey, look at this madsine here?
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How can I do my income packs in the middle of a bunch of bread
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crumbs. We'll clean up right away, Happy, carry out the doutions.
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Okay, okay, I'm gonna get the aspris. You can't enjoy income action
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without a don't worry here, we'll clean up the table right away. Oh,
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what's going on? Plenty? We're cleaning up boys? Oh well out
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help? Do you see my glasses anywhere? Oh? Use a taper,
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napps and to wipe the crumbs off the table. Oh, I'll do that,
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agel, hand me that shoe box, will you happy? Yeah?
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Okay? When you wipe the crumbs off the table, happy you could always
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wipe them into something, not just on the floor. Yeah, quick,
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are on the floor. I'll carry you off the shoe box with the crumbs.
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Keep your eye open for my glasses here coming down again. Okay,
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now this is gonna look more like we're in business here now, happy,
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I don't bunk you in my hair? Then me neither? All right,
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now, all right, nothing, nobody interrupt me. Don't even speak to
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them? Okay, gass? Who wants to Where am I receipt? Where
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am I receipt? Are you supposed to answers? They don't believe me?
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If I haven't, I'll go back a gosh, Dad, Willy, I
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haven't seen them at all yet. Well where are they? Are you talking
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about my glasses? No? No, no, my repeats they're gone.
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My glasses are also gone. Did you see me my glasses? No,
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my receipts? Have you seen them? No? Have you seen my glasses?
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No? Me neither. Maybe we can crust them. Maybe ask around
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here? My goodness, happy, how do you know about clept me yet?
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You'd be surprised when they teach you in the sixth glade? Now I
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know stuff. I wouldn't even want you to know, So good night.
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Without those receipts, I may go to prison. Well you're fortunate, cousin,
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Hollie. See, without my glasses, I can't tell where I'm going.
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Well, so many paper look around, see if you can find them?
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Will you The best I can do is steal around, because say,
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aren't you Hollie? All right, all right, who cares? If I
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do go to Alcatraz? Actually six six percent, six percent of seven dollars
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twenty six tent time forty actually of seven twenty six you see, six seven
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twenty six time, you wouldn't go to Alcatraz. I wouldn't know you'd go
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to Lovenwood. Maybe my glasses got schepped under this pile of papers. Don't
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see very well without the glasses, do you, Rich? Oh? No,
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In fact, that's why I wear him. If I find yours,
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can I get a reward? Come with okay? Oh boy, I find
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anything for a pop. If you come across something you don't understand, because
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howie, maybe I could help you. I made out my own income tact
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during a coffee break this afternoon. Oh, cousin, Rich, you must
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be good, No, just lucky. I haven't much income. Rich doesn't
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know the first thing about it. Actually I do know the first thing about
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it. The first thing about it is you're supposed to print your name on
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the top. Because so much, I'll print my name on it when I
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feel like printing my name on it. Maybe we could make kind of a
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game of it that would be cut with me. I'll listen. Alcatraz is
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fourth characters who think income. Well, I guess I may as well go
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to bed. See about. The only thing I can do without my glasses
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is sleep. Yeah, I wonder what Freckles will look like tomorrow if I
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don't find my glasses. You look just the same, if you will look
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different, Oh, don't mention it. We'll see you in the morning.
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Maybe, don't forget to punch your name doesn't how I n freak? So
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you're an Alcatraz Good morning, Freckles, Happy income back day? Good morning?
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What is something good point about? Oh? Sure? Oh excuse me,
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my lord contolibated, Good morning, mister. I'm sorry I can't vote,
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mister, because mister Easton did by Richard, you're not wearing glasses,
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you guess it. See. I took them off last night and put them
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down for a minute, and I haven't been able to see well enough sense
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to find them. Oh. I had to wash my face this morning without
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glasses. Richard. You don't wash your face with your glasses on me.
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Oh no, but see, I always to take a long last look at
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my face, just before I watch it. As a matter of fact,
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I can't even see your freckles. Well, how do you know it's me
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you're talking to because you always smellll just like lou Moan Hay Richard. It's
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friendship guid in Cologne. You may not your income facts yet, freckles.
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Oh No, I'm never worry about me because it's define up to find.
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Grandmother has a very close friend who has a nephew who works with the federal
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government, whose name is mister Dumpstereper. Oh, mister Dumpster is terrific an
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income texts. He doesn't mind because I'm related to my grandmother. Well,
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I got to get the work, that is, if I can find my
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dad. Good morning, miss Sigafood. I suppose good morning, mister ball
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right mentioned. Good morning, mister McCobb. I presume, uh huh,
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what's my erectr eyes wild? Hugh mcue Yet Hugh must finding up looking like
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myself without having luck like somebody else too. Oh sure, uh may not
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your income tact yet? You income back. I don't have much kids for
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it. If I don't want to pay income back fact his own business.
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I could pay income past myself if I wanted to. I'm just thinking my
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amusing way of spending money. Got you don't think get after you? Well,
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I like to keep finding them blanks and I want sid to camps there
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for a while to make one eye. But I took it up at all
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out figuring, and I said, huh huh, nobody wants to do it.
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It's all right with me. I wouldn't say a word against it.
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And no, sir, you saying my idea. Have a good time you,
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I mean, don't you get in trouble with the tax department? Trouble?
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Oh? No, rest so lessen. Some fellow down there to the
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income tax office keeps inviting me down to Sam. I've been real nice about
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it so far. I have him gone, but he keeps on inviting me.
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You know, some fellows might get their heads all fall out of that
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invitation. I'd just figure there's nothing much to it. Let's you just get
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your name and one of them struck or left the man you never get it
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all against income taxes, I just don't happen to care for on. Oh
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you you're making all this up. I know it really nice, bro,
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wasn't it. Oh? I have a coffee? You rich o't make it
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sabin. Oh, rich this is cotin Hazel. Oh, cousin Hazel,
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this is cousin rich You don't happen to remember seeing how it is income tactics
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in an old shoe box in the dining room, in the shoe box.
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Did you see it? Well? I didn't exactly see it. I just
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threw it in the trash bar collection this morning. Oh god, what do
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they do with the track? They just dumped it, big track. Oh
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I don't know. Ohohow is in trouble? Can't you see? I could
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if I had my glasses. Good Bye, goodbye? Oh god? Oh
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what can I do? Excuse me you? I've got to speak to the
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office manager. I'll get my back for god? What you do that?
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Richard? What's the matther Lex? Richard? I thought it was mister Beasley.
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There's something worth wrong in your grasses, Richard. Well, see,
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I've got to track a trash truck down. Uh, track a trash truck.
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But Richard, there's nothing able to see very well affect anything else.
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No, No, I've just got to track a trash truck down. Trash
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truck do you have to track down? Is? Well? I don't know
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which one actually the one with my cousin Ali's income back papers and in preferably
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they're in an old shoe box and I put them in the trash and the
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trash man have put them in the truck. That's the trash truck I have
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to track down. Oh, I'm so relieved. It makes sense. You'll
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never found it, rich Without your glasses, you wouldn't able to see the
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papers in the trash if you found the tash truck. Without my glasses,
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I wouldn't be able to see the trash track. Oh, poor Richard,
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I can this noon during lunch, will take my car and I'll have to
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track down trash trucks. You will, Oh, Freckles, What makes you
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so nice to me? Oh, I'll be your se trash truck tracker.
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Yeah, that's great, And I feel better already just thinking about you and
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me and the trash truck. We'll return to that, rich in the roma.
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We have our own text theory as what the Governor of North Carolina said
17:12
to the Governor of South Carolina. He probably said, in all friendliness,
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keep a sharp ear off of the Jack Benny program Sunday nights and CBS Radio.
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Well, it's fairy possible. He didn't say that, But with Jack
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Marry Don Bob Dennis in Rochester and their finest settling years, isn't a good
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idea anyway, This Sunday night at the Star's address that Jack Bennichell is America's
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main highway to hilarity. And now back to That's rich starring San Freeburg As
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rich Well, Buckles and Richards have been on a wild crass truck chase all
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through their lunch hollers. Eleven times they have been told by the drivers that
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the trucks don't have Cousin Howick's income tax receipts. There are only a few
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minutes left for the lunch hour. Now if Freckle's car goes up before the
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officers of Consolidated Paper Body Dominator, it's too bad, Richard. But I
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think it's just helpless. Yeah, poor cousin Howid. He was crazy with
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those income tax receipts. Now you'll be even crazier without him. You can
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see, Richard, the woods are just full of trash tecks which are full
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of bottles and ten hands, but not income tax. The seat, guys,
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I don't know what to do, used to be right here I'll be
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back in a minute. I haven't I here. Okay, okay, woods
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are full of trash trucks. I got to track down those papers. Merely
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a job for a detective. Detective always plays a hunts. If only I
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had a hunt, I wish I would get sixty like the lot pole maybe
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or very lad or sorry, A little girl riding letter through. All of
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the color has been changed to present an investigation. This is the word I
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didn't watch Tuesday. I work out a treasury Monday, March the fifteenth,
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twelve or one that night, I called him into the ten forty, and
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I got my way up the ten forty twenty two point two. Come in,
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as I'm way to twenty two point two six eighteen come in. I
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added up at ten point twenty two point two in the sixty eighteen and got
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three percent of line one, whichever is greater blanks to the chief. He
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knew I was loading. He gave me one hundred percent, patted me on
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the pocketbook, told me I was a good cop. Eleven forty five.
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It happened I saw a little girl on the blue hood carrying a shoe box.
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I stopped the questioner, pardon me, ma'am. Could I talk to
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for just a minute, ma'am? What about nothing much, ma'am. I
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just want to ask you for your questions. Ma'am. What's your name?
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What's you did? That's you? I'll put it down his blue riding hood.
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Where are you going, ma'am? My grandma's house. He's got a
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friend that's got a nephew. Yes, ma'am. What do you got in
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a shoe box? What are you trying to say? I got something in
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the shoe box top? No, ma'am, I didn't say that. Oh
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why asked me all these questions for just routine? Man, We just want
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to get the fact. Man looking at a shoebox, ma'am, he's not.
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Yes, little giant forges kissed. How to fit receipt arcata start off
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shotguns? Well? Loving suspicious here all right? I mean they want to
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talk to you later, so don't leave the woods to get them down the
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path. Because you didn't know I'd sing in my bare eyes and feel in
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the basket when I suspected all along by vocals. My job get the grandma's
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before she did. I think A short cut along a rabbit's path through the
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brush A sort of a short brush haircut. I walked up to the cottage,
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rang the bell. Okay, grandma, it's a raid, a raid
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time loving old hazels. You've got the wrong grandma. Yes, ma'am,
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Treasury department. We just want to get the fact, but you get the
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reduction on your form. I'm on a high probing diet on a ten porty
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and turned over to the internal trash collector putting the trash truck. Bet.
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I put on my grandma's and got into bed. Come in, ma'am,
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Hello, Grandma, I got your fish. What are you doing in bed?
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I'm seeing Poorlyandma, what did you have the better to get the facts?
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I just want to get the facts, ma'am. The grandma, what
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a big suspinia you have in your pockets? All about to serve you with
22:38
you under arrest doing your grandma operating your tax chiselers rings. That's fad.
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I shouldn't know knowing what, ma'am. You have nothing like my grandma.
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You forgot about the mustache, but I don't have a mustache. I know
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the grandma. Dad. Well, I see about the texts. I you
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gotta lead on them. One. I just played the hunch, the hunch
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with just a hunch, I played my luck. Somebimes, the hunch s
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pays off. Sometimes it doesn't. I was just lucky. I just play
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the hunt. I time I played washes. You did fight a hunt,
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A lucky guess. Sometimes the hunch plays off, sometimes it doesn't. You
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just fight the hunt. Does that gun tell me? Yeah, I just
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played a hunch, Richard, Richard, if you excuse me for saying so,
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Richard, you look as if you was sleeping with your eyes often without
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the glasses on. Oh gosh, I guess I was day dreaming. I
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have use for you. You know. My grandma just sends my view that
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works for the government. I've got it all six, Richard. He's just
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like to help your cousin Hollie. Oh, I'll call cousin Hazel right away,
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and freckles. Freckles, you're a lot better than a seeing idel.
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I don't worry about picking out to taxes because he licks telephone. He's been
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terribly worried all day, but it's all over. He's bringing a tactic for
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to ask you a government man, a government man. Hey's now listen to
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me. I don't want anybody poking his nose into my income taxes. What
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are you so nervous about it? He no, Look, I tell you
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he's a padre looking for income tax evaders. But how you're not an income
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taxic Well, of course I'm not. You wouldn't cheat this cheat on income
25:00
ridiculous. Well, that's something nobody could take a chance on. Of course,
25:06
the person can make a mistake candy once in a while and then without
25:12
meaning to look all right, of course, every time it came out to
25:18
a half fan. Well I got the half fan, that's all. It's
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not because now he does Hazel come in, mister gum Stepper. This is
25:52
mister gum Stepper. He's in the government, that's right. This is my
25:57
cousin, Hazel removed and my cousin how he points removed or something. Mister
26:07
Dumpstepper is the nephew of my grandmother's just friend, and he just loves income
26:11
tactic, don't you, mister Dumpstepper. That's right. Well, I think
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it's very nice of you, mister Dumpsteppers, to be willing to send income
26:22
tax english. That's right. Mister Gumpstepper doesn't like to talk very much,
26:33
but he likes this to add that's right. Truthfully, mister Dunstepper's head is
26:41
just plastically like an ad with hair. Try him, because now he's getting
26:47
coming to his head. He'll show you that's necessary. Going ahead, go
26:51
ahead, give him coming to his head, give him something to add in
26:56
his head. If you'll excuse me, Hey, could I speak to you
27:03
for a minute? And if you excuse me, howie is the man cut
27:10
that door? Has? Didn't I tell you? He's ad on the cover?
27:17
Wow? Let me think? Well? Ont of things? Make the
27:18
thing come? The way he talks without saying anything. I'm I'm not going
27:26
to get caught in a thing like this. Wow, Well, anything's better?
27:33
Then lets the guy there it goes, It goes one hundred and fifty
27:38
dollars. Yes, I'll give that to happy and tell him to run to
27:44
the mailbox with it. That's what your cousin has cost me, one hundred
27:48
and fifty dollars. Now here you you stand happy out with this? I'll
27:52
tell him to run like crazy. Here, got your paper? Because howie
27:57
we're waiting to go to work. Well, that's that's too bad. The
28:06
he the pack is my income taxic bot has already been mailed. Oh god,
28:11
mister gump Stepper, you came out here for nothing. I find my
28:19
glasses. Oh, my glasses? Thanks? Happy? Where'd you find them?
28:25
Reward? Oh that's deductible. Not's wrong? Well where did you find
28:30
them? Happy? Well? See, I looked everywhere. Just minutes ago
28:34
I went out through the alley to mail a letter for jas and I looked
28:37
in the crash Birol, then close to the ten Towns on the cold of
28:41
a lot of papers. See the an't take any trash if it's got a
28:44
lot of stuff, little brun in it. Oh, your glasses were right
28:48
on top. Look that wonderful. Now you looks so nice again? Oh,
28:56
don't mention it. Let me see. God, you still got him
29:03
freckles, freckles? What were the papers I brought him in? You gotta
29:10
brhm? Okay, give me give me those collo gun Stepper, I can
29:15
prove everything. Have your boss the guns Steppers in the Bureau of Affair.
29:25
That's the quickly amity and incomes. That's right, good night, My return
29:36
is in the mail. It's gone. Did you remember to pinch your name
29:40
on it? Cousin Holly, my name my name? Sure? Guy?
29:45
Didn't you don't never know whose return that is cousin rich. Thank you don't
29:53
mention it at the moment. We'll return to that rip the Sunday Night Gale
30:08
Farm and Charles Ferrell's Ladies for another swap six session of My Little Margie.
30:14
One lay follows another on My Little Margie Sunday nights on most of these same
30:18
stations. Now back to that's rip. Will that takes care of my income
30:27
tact form unless you can think of any changes. Oh no, see,
30:33
I think your form is filled out fine already, Frechel. I wouldn't want
30:38
to gain a line of it. Ladies and gentlemen, that rip. This
31:00
has been that grip. Friends, I've done Sam Putberg. That's ritched than
31:04
your Paddy. Chappin also has a huge Peter back of the CHRISTI dont lapping
31:08
Tony kay is Hollida He's going to Happy Drump with Dogs Butler's You Met You
31:12
music by Gardfield, Roy Rowland speaking that rip granted and written by Frank and
31:18
do Away with Begnel material by Sam Freeburg and Dog Butler is but it isn't
31:22
directed by Homer paddon Field Art and Dodge and I was a babu. Welcome
31:38
back, Well a very funny program and just some great voices in that,
31:45
and nice to hear DAWs Butler a few years before he became forever associated with
31:51
the voice of Huckleberry Han. The voice in particular is created for a droopy
31:59
short and was later used at MGM in a couple of other shorts, but
32:04
here we get to hear it on the radio. So I hope you enjoyed
32:07
this, And again we conclude with a great honor to Stan Freeburg, and
32:12
we will be back tomorrow continuing our regular lineup. Join us for the Saint
32:16
in the meanwhile, send your comments to Box thirteen at Great Detectives dot net,
32:21
follow us on Twitter at Radio Detectives, and become one of our friends
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on Facebook, Facebook, dot com. Slash Radio Detectives from Boise, Idaho.
32:29
This is your host, Adam Grahams On and Off