Latest / The Rochelle Christiane Podcast / 215. From Anger to Art: A Pathway to Healing with Manuela Welton

Transcript

215. From Anger to Art: A Pathway to Healing with Manuela Welton · The Rochelle Christiane Podcast

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: Welcome to the Emotional Mastery Podcast.
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: I am your host, Rochelle.
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: I'm a holistic human design health coach and this is a space for human design and spiritual journey.
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: It's not about being a master of your emotions, rather mastering the tools to self-regulate, to awakening yourself and remembering who you are.
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: Human design changed my life about five years ago and I've been learning and teaching the system ever since.
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: This podcast is human design meets spirituality, meets astrology.
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: You don't have to have a belief system to be here, just an open mind and curiosity.
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: This is a journey of meeting yourself and awakening to your infinite potential.
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: Now let the magic begin.
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: This week on the podcast, I am talking to Manuela Welton, who is a healer, an artist, a creative and intuitive.
• 0:49
  Speaker 1: I think she holds quite a few hats.
• 0:53
  Speaker 1: She also has a master's degree in human development from Harvard University.
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: She has been a keynote speaker at diversity conferences.
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: She has been a keynote speaker at diversity conferences.
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: I mean she's just a wealth of wisdom, information, energy.
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: I mean it's just so beautiful.
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: When I first came into, or rather when she first found me, we'll say that I think it was through the Almost 30 podcast and at the time I was part of their community space and she came in and held a session and I remember watching it, just amazed at the energy she brought, the way that she held space for the women within that session.
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: And shortly after I booked a session with her, a one-on-one session, a distance energy healing session, and it was just incredible what came up and I have followed her ever since and last year she launched this global circles community.
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: That wasn't even public, it was just.
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: She literally posted about it once and I saw it and I was like I'm in I don't know what it is, but I'm in and just within this community space she's creating such a different type of community where it's not necessarily guided or led by her.
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: I'll say it is a collective community and it's really beautiful what she's doing and retreats and breathwork sessions and dancing sessions and astrology and she really raises each member up to share what they do and their healing arts and their wisdom and their businesses and everything like that and it's really really such a beautiful space.
• 2:22
  Speaker 1: I believe it will be released soon to the public, if it's not already, but there is a link I put in the show notes where you can apply to be in there.
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: But yeah, this episode was so good.
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: We talked about so many different things that we shared such beautiful wisdom and energy in this episode, and we talked about things from the healing arts to technology, to nature, to philosophy, to slowing down in life, right, Getting to know your shadows, soul contracts, relationships, expressing anger through art Like it really really was so beautiful.
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm really excited for you to listen to this and I'm recording this episode on the full moon in Pisces, the eclipse.
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: So today I feel very energized, I feel very excited, I feel so hopeful and just really looking forward to everything.
• 3:12
  Speaker 1: And I know we have life has ebbs and flows, we go up and down and my daughter's been asking some really deep questions lately, which has really been getting me thinking and I feel this really interesting.
• 3:24
  Speaker 1: I feel more so over the past year this really softening, this really feminine energy flowing through me, which I feel like I was really disconnected to for a long time, because I think our culture values the masculine and a lot of time women operate more on the masculine and learning, not necessarily through outside sources, and that's something that we talked about in this podcast but I think we're, even when we begin to heal and in the spiritual journey, we sort of outsource still to things outside of us to tell us how we should be healing, how we should be moving through this, how we should be connecting, and I think there becomes a point where we kind of throw all that away.
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: And I still follow people, I still read books, I still listen to things, but at the end of the day I come back and tune into myself and recognize if that thing feels good for me or not.
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: I'm a 6'3 in human design, so I will always trial and error things.
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: But I think now understanding deeply in my body what feels good to me empowers me to be able to make better decisions for myself and my family, powers me to be able to make better decisions for myself and my family.
• 4:28
  Speaker 1: And I have created massive awareness, I think over the last six months and I say this and I have so much more work to do I don't think we're ever really done but I've created so much more awareness of when I'm falling into ego or when I'm falling into shadow.
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: And I think the most powerful thing is I released the need to force things to happen.
• 4:46
  Speaker 1: I think sometimes we want to heal so much that in the desire to, we are creating resistance and creating a lack, and so I sort of feel like I think I talked about it last week there was just some point where something shifted to me and I feel like I fully surrendered, in a way that I'm not forcing, I am just allowing, so when something bothers me, I can move through that instead of going to look for something to bother me, and it's just, yeah, it's just been this really beautifully soft feminine energy that's been moving through me and certainly feeling it now, with the Pisces energy coming up, and it's just a really interesting dynamic.
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: And I think understanding human design and my chart and just everything right, Like I was talking about the way that I air quote should be deepening my spirituality, and Manuela really caught me out.
• 5:39
  Speaker 1: She's like who said that you should do it that way?
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: And it's true, right, Like we, you have full permission to do things in the way that you want to.
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: I think there are things that help.
• 5:51
  Speaker 1: I think having a ritual routine, whether that is meditation and whatever that looks like for you.
• 5:59
  Speaker 1: I think meditation is just coming inside, right, and recognizing our thoughts and stilling our thoughts and stilling our body and whatever way that looks for you, whether it is sitting in strict meditation right, which is very masculine, or walking meditation, or I interviewed.
• 6:15
  Speaker 1: I have a podcast coming out in maybe a month and we were talking about you know this habit stacking and how maybe your meditation is a walking meditation on the treadmill, right, Like we're incorporating those things into our day and I think that, most importantly, understanding what feels good and what doesn't feel good in your system so for me I know I've definitely had I think now being very in tune with my body and how it feels helps me make better decisions.
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: So if I want to have a cookie now, I can sit for a moment before I eat that cookie and be like, okay, how is this actually going to feel in my body?
• 6:54
  Speaker 1: Do I actually want to do that?
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: And it takes no more than five seconds to have this little internal conversation, but I can feel in my body now that I don't actually want that.
• 7:03
  Speaker 1: What can I do instead?
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: Maybe I just actually need to chug water and go for a walk or something, Right, and it's really like following that and being in flow with that.
• 7:11
  Speaker 1: I think it's just been really empowering over the last little bit and it's just a really exciting journey and exciting space and I've definitely been feeling called more to my roots in this space, and so I've launched it's not a program Well, I guess it is a program but it's a one-on-one coaching, a three-month container and it's called the rewired self, where we're going in and deeply connecting to our body, understanding what our body is telling us.
• 7:37
  Speaker 1: So we're connecting intuitively, we're connecting physically, understanding you know how to read a label.
• 7:43
  Speaker 1: Sometimes the basics of health is something that we're not necessarily taught.
• 7:46
  Speaker 1: So we're starting where you're at and we're diving into that.
• 7:49
  Speaker 1: And it's a three-month container with weekly check-ins, all the tools and support astrology, human design and your physical health and learning how to stack habits and learning how to create habits, healthy habits, how to tap into our body and really deeply connect.
• 8:04
  Speaker 1: And I'm really excited to sort of fuse everything that I have learned along the way into this holistic health program.
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: And so, if you're interested in that, the link will be below.
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: It is called the Rewired Self.
• 8:18
  Speaker 1: You know, rewiring your mind, your body, so that your soul can be free and that you can remember the soul within.
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: And, without further ado, I will leave the episode.
• 8:30
  Speaker 1: I hope that you love it.
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: It was so, so nice to have this conversation with Manuela, and I'm so grateful that she came on the podcast and you can find her on Instagram, her website, Global Circles.
• 8:41
  Speaker 1: I've linked everything below and, yeah, the rewire itself is linked below.
• 8:46
  Speaker 1: And if you found this episode to resonate, share with a friend it really does help and rate, review, subscribe all the things.
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: Spotify five stars you just click it.
• 8:55
  Speaker 1: And, yeah, Substack I post more regularly now on Substack.
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: And yeah, those are all the ways that you can find me on Instagram at Rochelle Christianne, R-O-C-H-E-L-L-E, dot.
• 9:08
  Speaker 1: C-h-r-i-s-t-i-a-n-e.
• 9:10
  Speaker 1: I will catch you soon.
• 9:12
  Speaker 1: Welcome to the Emotional Mastery Podcast.
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: Today I have Manuela Welton, who is an intuitive jewelry maker.
• 9:20
  Speaker 1: I mean, I'm always so Whenever I'm in your energy, just from the very beginning.
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: I heard you on the almost 30 podcast first of all and I was like Whoa, so I followed you.
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: And then I think you were in their community, Like you did like a session, and I remember just like I was just amazed by your energy and so I sort of like followed you since then.
• 9:38
  Speaker 1: And then you did the global circles and I was like I have to be a part of this.
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: I don't even know what it is, I just want to be a part of it.
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: So I feel like I don't even know if like intuitive, like fully covers, like what you do, Cause I just feel like just energetically from you, I just feel so much like wisdom and just like I don't know.
• 9:54
  Speaker 1: It's this beautiful soft energy.
• 9:56
  Speaker 1: So I don't, I'm going to let you kind of like introduce yourself.
• 10:00
  Speaker 1: Um, and yeah, I guess like what you do, and I know we have so much to talk about and so we'll just take it from there thank you, rochelle.
• 10:12
  Speaker 2: Beautiful introduction.
• 10:13
  Speaker 2: I I, as you mentioned, I do many, many things.
• 10:16
  Speaker 2: I create.
• 10:17
  Speaker 2: I am a very strong creative and I I like to think of life as as a, as a canvas, and every day we get to choose a different thing, person, place, whatever we want to create.
• 10:28
  Speaker 2: So jewelry, dance, the healing arts was the path that chose me.
• 10:34
  Speaker 2: I never chose it.
• 10:34
  Speaker 2: I wanted to actually act when I was little, but then I realized very, very soon after that acting is in everything, in everything we do and because of life circumstances, healing chose me and I started very, very young and but then realized very soon after also that dance was.
• 10:52
  Speaker 2: It was a passion because I grew up with it, and then jewelry making and clothing and all of that is like a way that I express myself.
• 10:59
  Speaker 2: But every day and every, every moment, I try to find new ways.
• 11:04
  Speaker 2: I don't understand how people get bored in life because there's so much to explore and free.
• 11:10
  Speaker 2: Also, you don't have to pay much to to explore your different, your different ways of being this life.
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: I love that.
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I will like sit here if I ever like get bored, like I'm air quoting it.
• 11:22
  Speaker 1: I mean I just for me.
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: It's like I love to read so I'm like there's so much I can learn.
• 11:26
  Speaker 1: There's so like I can't stop ordering books Cause I'm like I literally want to know everything, like there's no end to it.
• 11:32
  Speaker 2: But there really isn't.
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: And then, but you spend a lot of times.
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you really could and I think that, like you do, I, you know, I'm jumping around but like systems, like human design, where people, you know they're skeptics and everything and they're, you know, talk about, you know, the man who downloaded it, and but the knowledge that he downloaded would take lifetimes to accumulate, you know.
• 11:53
  Speaker 1: And so it's like, whether he was just smart enough to put it together or it was downloaded or whatever, there's just like lifetimes of like wisdom and knowledge within that system that is so beautiful.
• 12:03
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and thinking back on, like ancient times, philosophers, right when I think of times where we didn't have as much distraction and, and you know, we could spend time outside.
• 12:12
  Speaker 2: I was actually just this past weekend in Yellowstone and a close door to the car, middle of the night, with the stars.
• 12:20
  Speaker 2: Can you imagine those times where we didn't have like technology or ways to like quickly look for things?
• 12:26
  Speaker 2: What like philosophers of that time were exploring just by looking at the stars, like how are they down or downloading or coming up with all this information is just beyond me.
• 12:37
  Speaker 2: It's like, wow, and here we are with these technologies, tools, human design, astrology, gene keys, name it.
• 12:46
  Speaker 2: It's there, it's beautiful.
• 12:47
  Speaker 2: We get to learn and create and innovate new ways of being.
• 12:51
  Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely.
• 12:51
  Speaker 1: I think.
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: Sometimes, though, too, like the amount of technology we have sort of disconnects us from being able to connect through ourselves.
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: You know, like I don't know, I'm in Texas.
• 13:01
  Speaker 1: We get some pretty bad storms, and I always think about that.
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: I'm like, oh my gosh, like imagine the times where we didn't have houses, like what did they do?
• 13:08
  Speaker 1: I mean, I'm sure storms, maybe they weren't that bad back then, I don't know.
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: But you know, just like little things like that, where it's you were.
• 13:29
  Speaker 1: I mean some of the storms that you get.
• 13:29
  Speaker 2: You look at the sky to really predict, or like the new satelis, and we just would watch, like these ominous clouds like rolling in and just the beliefs that I don't know, it's just it blows my mind the myth, the myth that came from that right, like you know, whatever persification of the cloud that was created in that storm, I think it's so beautiful and so much art came from that.
• 13:40
  Speaker 2: Also, you know the ancient hieroglyphs that were created in caves and, yeah, the hunting and gathering and, ah, it's so fascinating.
• 13:48
  Speaker 2: As I said, I'm coming with this energy of yellowstone and or, as the first nations would call, yellow rock, and it's just, it's beautiful to me to go back to those times.
• 13:59
  Speaker 2: And here we are with technology and here, you know, and yes, it does create distraction and I think it's a balance of the relationship that you want to have with everything.
• 14:07
  Speaker 2: I myself have to create weeks for myself where I don't have computer or phone and I just unplug myself for a full week and I come back not only recharged, but I come back with a higher awareness of intuition.
• 14:24
  Speaker 2: It's like your senses are a lot more open to what's in front of you.
• 14:29
  Speaker 2: It's beautiful, yeah.
• 14:31
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I've done a couple of trips where I've been really disconnected from technology and I say I like the way that I come back.
• 14:38
  Speaker 1: It's just completely different.
• 14:40
  Speaker 1: And I think sometimes, being a mom, I like hesitate to like disconnect in that way, cause I'm like what if my kids?
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: But then I'm also like why can't I just take them with me and disconnect from everyone else?
• 14:48
  Speaker 2: You're reading my mind today.
• 14:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly, and teach them, because I think they're growing up in a time where there's only technology.
• 14:57
  Speaker 2: They don't know what we know, which was a time without technology, and it's so beautiful that we get to merge both technology and no technology.
• 15:05
  Speaker 2: But I think this, this new generation that's coming in, doesn't know a life without it.
• 15:10
  Speaker 2: So it's beautiful you can see your kids with and say, hey, look at what's ahead, like it's look at this you know, yeah, yeah, we went to Colorado.
• 15:20
  Speaker 1: When my parents have a.
• 15:22
  Speaker 1: They rent a home in Colorado in the summer and so I went there for a week.
• 15:24
  Speaker 1: My kids were there all summer.
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: But just being able to like be in nature and have those moments where, like we're going to go on a hike, you know leave the phones, or I mean they're on us but you know nobody's like on them, and it's just amazing the difference in attitude, you know, of my kids, or just being able to get outside and just be in it, because I think, yeah, like so often, like my daughter, often she's just in her room on her phone and I'm like don't you want to come out and do something like?
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: yeah, the new family is like texting literally she'll text me from her room and I'm like, come talk to me.
• 15:57
  Speaker 2: But that's what I'm saying.
• 15:58
  Speaker 2: They don't know life without it, like that's the norm for them, right?
• 16:02
  Speaker 2: So taking on some, I, I, I really feel and I catch myself when I'm in places of nature taking photos and it's like why are you taking the photos?
• 16:10
  Speaker 2: Is that for sharing?
• 16:11
  Speaker 2: And often I, I never share it barely in social media and I catch myself like taking so many photos instead of just being present with nature and we forget that that presence with nature also heals.
• 16:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah, like we have to do a healing session, we don't have to do it.
• 16:27
  Speaker 2: Like just being one with that time, with the trees, which are our elders, can share so much healing, yeah, yeah.
• 16:39
  Speaker 1: I think you are.
• 16:40
  Speaker 1: You do photography.
• 16:42
  Speaker 2: I do I.
• 16:42
  Speaker 2: That was a past life in this lifetime for me.
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: Me too I have my bachelor's in photography and I did it professionally for just a little while.
• 16:49
  Speaker 1: But I realized when I did it professionally I lost my passion for it.
• 16:52
  Speaker 1: So I was like I'd rather have this as my creative outlet.
• 16:57
  Speaker 1: But when you talk about Because I do that too I'm always taking pictures of the things that I'm doing no-transcript.
• 17:13
  Speaker 2: Well, I start to.
• 17:13
  Speaker 2: I actually started realizing that in my travels there was something in between me and experiencing that moment, and that was the camera, and it was like a big gap between my heart and the experience.
• 17:25
  Speaker 2: So I talk about presence.
• 17:26
  Speaker 2: Right, you're freezing in time, which is so beautiful because you get to share it with the world, but then your experience of it is mainly composing the image to share it with the world versus being in the experience of presence and to the people.
• 17:40
  Speaker 2: I actually let it go, which is so sad because I really loved it, but it was.
• 17:44
  Speaker 2: You know, it was too much to to have that between me and the space.
• 17:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that makes so much sense.
• 17:52
  Speaker 1: I used to like carry a camera in my in my car and I had one in my bag, and now with the phone, it's you know what I mean Like they keep upgrading them and I'm like.
• 17:59
  Speaker 1: You know, I don't even need to bring a camera anymore.
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: That's right, take a picture of my phone.
• 18:02
  Speaker 2: I think everybody now is a photographer, right?
• 18:05
  Speaker 2: So what's?
• 18:05
  Speaker 2: You know like before the photographer was like a big person.
• 18:08
  Speaker 1: You know, now everybody's a photographer, so everybody's a photographer, until it comes time to take a picture of the moon.
• 18:12
  Speaker 1: You need a camera for that yeah, it's true.
• 18:16
  Speaker 2: And the stars, although the new phone is taking camera or taking great photos of stars yeah, I bet.
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: I mean I just like sometimes when I see the moon and I'm driving, I take a picture and I know that that's not going to.
• 18:26
  Speaker 1: I need to like stop and set up the thing.
• 18:28
  Speaker 1: Even with the camera or the phone, I'm sure it would take a nice picture, but I'm always like I would love to see your moon photography.
• 18:36
  Speaker 1: Oh my gosh.
• 18:36
  Speaker 1: No, I like I feel like I need to get my camera out for that, just because, like I think for me it creates.
• 18:42
  Speaker 1: Like when I have my camera in my hand, it just creates an intention and a space that, like I don't get on my phone Right, like I have to like set the exposure and I have to get the tripod or whatever it is Like it helps me like create more of a vision than just this, like snap, snap, snap of the iPhone just puts me in a different space.
• 18:58
  Speaker 1: So I need to get out.
• 19:00
  Speaker 2: Isn't that a whole philosophy of life, right?
• 19:04
  Speaker 2: Isn't that a whole philosophy of life, right?
• 19:07
  Speaker 2: Taking that's one thing I've been sitting with lately, which is like taking your time and setting it up, and I'm always like snap, snap, snap, snap.
• 19:12
  Speaker 2: Yeah, as we started with the introduction, I'm always in the next thing and it's like actually what would it?
• 19:17
  Speaker 2: Be like to set yourself some space and time set set it up.
• 19:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah, well, you're a projector in human design, right, I am okay.
• 19:25
  Speaker 1: Yeah so I'm a man yeah sorry, mental projector, yeah, yeah I'm uh, I'm an mg manifesting generator, so I'm like everything is constantly so fast for me.
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: I've always done things so fast, and so it's really been this practice of like, kind of like that, where it's like we have time, you know, like we don't have to rush through everything and and speeding like we don't have to rush through everything and and speeding through things isn't going to make things come faster, right, and I think there is that beauty in the stillness, in the pause, where you're actually manifesting more than if you're doing, doing, doing right.
• 19:56
  Speaker 2: But you know what I've been sitting with with that?
• 19:58
  Speaker 2: Because I'm like why is that for me?
• 20:00
  Speaker 2: What is that energy for me that I need to be going, going, doing, doing, doing, doing.
• 20:04
  Speaker 2: And I actually got taken back to my birth and it was a c-section and like it almost feels like not having that natural canal of like slowing, slowly coming into life, slow, ripped away from my mom, created this necessity that I don't have enough time.
• 20:20
  Speaker 2: Just recently, like this last weekend, I got asked what is your greatest fear?
• 20:23
  Speaker 2: And like it was like so loud death.
• 20:26
  Speaker 2: And I was like why, like I've been with death so much, I'm actually not afraid of death.
• 20:30
  Speaker 2: What I'm afraid of is not having enough time before I die.
• 20:36
  Speaker 2: And then I connected that to like, oh, like I need to go, go, go because, like you know, there's not enough time.
• 20:42
  Speaker 2: And then I connected that back to my birth of like not having enough time with my, with in my mom's womb yeah.
• 20:48
  Speaker 2: Wow, and so really having that awareness can create like a different relationship to, to that Cause I think there's so many of us that are running, running, running running running going how many C-sections are in the world?
• 21:00
  Speaker 2: Oh my gosh.
• 21:01
  Speaker 1: A ton Was in the world.
• 21:05
  Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, a ton.
• 21:06
  Speaker 1: Was it a?
• 21:06
  Speaker 1: Do you know if it was a planned C-section or emergency C-section, emergency.
• 21:08
  Speaker 1: Okay, I feel like, yeah, I feel like the energy behind an emergency C-section is very different than planned.
• 21:12
  Speaker 1: I do think that I've had two planned C-sections my daughter was breech and then my son, because I already had one.
• 21:17
  Speaker 1: They were like it's just not many doctors will take the risk of doing vaginal birth after C-section.
• 21:23
  Speaker 1: So I was like, okay, we'll just go for the C-section the second time.
• 21:26
  Speaker 1: But I do believe that there is that, yeah, you're taking this child out.
• 21:31
  Speaker 1: That's not quite ready, although with my son, it's interesting I had my C-section scheduled, so I knew it was happening and I was supposed to go in at like 8 AM and the night before I don't know I don't know if it was a full moon or something, I don't know but like all of these women went into labor and so they didn't have space for me in the hospital and so I was like sitting in my car waiting for them to call me and I started going into labor because I remember I was like something's not right, like this doesn't feel right, cause I had never experienced labor, cause I was like I don't feel good, like can I come in.
• 22:03
  Speaker 1: And so they were like, yeah, we can hook you up.
• 22:04
  Speaker 1: And then I was in active labor so it's interesting he was like he was coming whether I was having a C-section or not.
• 22:09
  Speaker 1: But I do believe that the energy of like I know I'm going to have a C-section, I can prepare for it, versus oh my gosh.
• 22:16
  Speaker 1: This is completely throwing my plan of what I just feel like women who have had emergency C-sections tend to have a little bit harder of a recovery and it's a little bit mentally and emotionally more challenging.
• 22:30
  Speaker 2: And of course the child is taking that on, well, energetically, absolutely, we take that on.
• 22:38
  Speaker 2: Absolutely, we take that on.
• 22:38
  Speaker 2: That's, that's the awareness of like it's all interconnected and it all lives in our body.
• 22:41
  Speaker 2: It like really does so it's it's.
• 22:43
  Speaker 2: I loved we were just having a conversation on you know, getting to know your shadows, getting to know yourself, getting to know those little pieces that you know, and then the more you know those, the more you can not only like step in but help others as well.
• 23:00
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and it's incredible what we've taken on from times that we don't even really remember.
• 23:07
  Speaker 1: It's like I don't know.
• 23:09
  Speaker 1: Sometimes when I think about that, it's like how do you heal from something you don't even remember?
• 23:13
  Speaker 1: And I mean it is the slowing down and the creating awareness and, even if it doesn't make sense, just listening to your body, because I've had some memories that have come up afterwards and I'm like, cause I've had some memories that have come up afterwards and I'm like Whoa, like I don't even remember, I don't, I don't consciously remember that Like how could that be impacting me so greatly, like as an adult?
• 23:32
  Speaker 2: but, and not only the memories that you don't remember, but the memories that you're carrying, that are not even yours.
• 23:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's such a big work, the journey, the journey is endless.
• 23:45
  Speaker 2: At some point you need to be like put it aside.
• 23:47
  Speaker 2: Go enjoy your life, because it really is.
• 23:49
  Speaker 2: We could spend our entire life looking for things, yeah.
• 23:54
  Speaker 1: And I feel like I bounce between that where it's like I heal so hard for a period of time, and then I'm like it shouldn't always be like this, like I have to have joy, I have to have, and I think like that's also the beautiful thing of like just relationships, be it friendships or, you know, partners, romance, like they bring this different energy.
• 24:11
  Speaker 1: I think if we're doing it not that there's a wrong or right way to do it, but I think if we're calling in the right people, I guess like I'm air quoting it that they're going to bring that contrast of like hey, let's just like, let's play, or you know, whatever it is that we need.
• 24:30
  Speaker 2: I think sometimes we do need somebody from outside of us to remind us of that.
• 24:32
  Speaker 1: Yes, and and as I, yeah, and you were mentioning it's usually somebody very different, right?
• 24:35
  Speaker 2: So how is that person teaching you?
• 24:36
  Speaker 2: I mean, I know that one big time, you know I'm go go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, you know, and and I have, like you know, the slow down in front of me.
• 24:45
  Speaker 2: So it's beautiful, it's that?
• 24:50
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's certainly alchemy, and if there's a lot of resistance to the alchemy, oh yeah, that's what I was thinking too.
• 24:57
  Speaker 1: It's like we we call people in that hold the opposite energy, and, as beautiful as that is and as healing as that is, there's always a friction, there's always a trigger in there too.
• 25:05
  Speaker 1: Like I feel that.
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: So, like I said on the live, like I'm dating a reflector and just like it's.
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: He's so slow to do anything and I'm just like can you make a decision?
• 25:16
  Speaker 1: Can we do something?
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: I don't care, cause I'm just so fast.
• 25:20
  Speaker 1: But then it's that reminder of like yes, it's frustrating, but what is the rush, you know?
• 25:26
  Speaker 1: And so I can watch that and be like I don't, and that's what I'll tell them too.
• 25:29
  Speaker 2: I'm like I don't, I'm not trying to pressure you or like have you make a decision right now, but like also, Can we talk about that for a moment, because I feel like a lot of people navigate this and it's like most people exit, most like I can't do this, like it's too much, like it's such hard, you know, because I I do believe that opposites do attract and most people are looking for somebody similar right yeah, and so I like what, how?
• 25:55
  Speaker 2: and I like how do you navigate that like that, like a very different energy?
• 25:59
  Speaker 1: and then you're faced with that and it's like yeah you know what I honestly think, because there have been multiple points in our relationship that I've wanted to exit and I have like there's been one point where I was like we're done.
• 26:13
  Speaker 1: Now there's been a couple where I've just, you know, we've had deep conversations and I think that I think understanding this information, like astrology and human design, has been really helpful to be like okay, he's a reflector Right, and so I understand that something that might take me like two days to decide like takes him a moon cycle, you know, or he's just very and he's a cancer son, so he's really, really ruled by the moon, so and he's a Pisces rising.
• 26:43
  Speaker 2: I love it.
• 26:44
  Speaker 2: I try not to box people, but he's just like.
• 26:48
  Speaker 1: He can be very flaky, like he over commits to things, but he really doesn't have the energy to do it, and so I used to get so mad or I would be like just tell me no, just say no, I'm like it's fine.
• 26:58
  Speaker 1: But I think you know, and I think about previous relationships and the amount that I've actually healed within this because I've been so triggered and because I've had to face myself in such a deep way and because I also think a huge part of it is like, in whatever capacity of whatever relationship, somebody that's opposite you or anything, but like somebody, that what I've come to really appreciate about our like dynamic is that he will always hold the space to allow me to say what I need to say, feel what I need to feel.
• 27:26
  Speaker 1: He does not gaslight me.
• 27:27
  Speaker 1: He's always like let's talk about it, like.
• 27:29
  Speaker 1: We always like move through those, and so for me, I've never really had that space of like, and he's like my biggest like fan too, where if I get down on myself, he's like I'm not going to let you talk about yourself like that, Like you know what I mean.
• 27:41
  Speaker 1: So I think that in itself is beautiful, um, but there are still points where, yeah, it's just, I think, any like healing relationship, whether it's a lifetime relationship or not, it's going to pick at those scabs you know, and I think any relationship is going to pick it.
• 27:57
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah.
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: Parental children, friends, like, yeah, I think that's exactly like.
• 28:06
  Speaker 1: Whether it's like, I don't know, I guess a soul contract of somebody that comes in.
• 28:08
  Speaker 1: I can't remember what book it was, I think it.
• 28:09
  Speaker 1: I was reading one recently and in it he was talking about, um, you know, soul contracts and people who come to like help you heal.
• 28:15
  Speaker 1: And he's like even the worst relationships you've been in, even the most painful ones, he's like if you can think of it from the perspective of that soul actually loved you so much that they were willing to come here to hurt you and live a life without you in order to evolve your soul.
• 28:31
  Speaker 1: And it's such a hard I think, 3d human concept to wrap your brain around, because I've been in a pretty awful relationship where I don't even want to talk to that person.
• 28:40
  Speaker 1: Now it's still like, and if you look at it from that lens, you know it's hard because my ego is like no, I mean given the satisfaction of saying he's got a good soul, but at the end of the day, you know we're all connected and I do believe.
• 28:52
  Speaker 1: I do believe that that is true gaslight, bypass anybody's experience.
• 29:13
  Speaker 2: But it is a beautiful awareness to actually see life in that way, you know, and particularly breakups and things like that, um, they come to highlight versions of ourselves or things that we have like without it, we wouldn't learn without it, we wouldn't see without it.
• 29:25
  Speaker 2: How do we know that that's actually still in us?
• 29:27
  Speaker 2: So much of my own healing has come from personal relationship, romantic relationship.
• 29:32
  Speaker 2: Thank god, because without them I wouldn't have, like, realized any patterns in my parents or in my life that, like you know, because I always have this thing and I don't know where it comes from, I don't know whose it is, but it's like we're always right when we're alone, right and versus when we're in relationship.
• 29:50
  Speaker 2: We're always constantly learning about ourselves, like what triggers us, what makes us angry, but it's like what are all these things that are still living in us?
• 29:58
  Speaker 2: I have a very much easier time being alone than in relationship.
• 30:00
  Speaker 2: My biggest, biggest teacher is relationship and it's romantic relationship.
• 30:05
  Speaker 2: 100, that's a big one yeah, yeah, so is mine.
• 30:09
  Speaker 1: Like I'm so emotionally neutral.
• 30:11
  Speaker 1: If I'm by myself, I'm good, I'm like I'll be happy for you know, whatever.
• 30:17
  Speaker 1: And then as soon as, like the, I enter into something romantically, like I'm just find myself and that's just like emotional chaos.
• 30:23
  Speaker 1: We're like, oh my gosh, and.
• 30:25
  Speaker 1: And I remember like I after so, uh, I was an abusive marriage and so once that ended, I spent like two I think it was like two and a half years.
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: I didn't date anybody and at the end of the day I was terrified to enter into something again.
• 30:36
  Speaker 1: I was terrified to like repeat the patterns.
• 30:39
  Speaker 1: But I was in therapy once and she was like Rochelle, you know, it's great to be doing this work, but if you don't enter into the place that caused you so much pain, you're never going to heal.
• 30:48
  Speaker 1: And I was like, oh my gosh, I am so mad that she's right.
• 30:52
  Speaker 1: And then I started dating and it's just like every person since then, it's like they've shown me a piece of myself and, as challenging as some of those have been, I think that I've done enough work that I can see the red flags now, and I think the most important part is, I've done enough work to value myself and so that makes it so much easier when somebody maybe has a red flag or has signs of abuse or whatever.
• 31:13
  Speaker 1: And I hate to say it too, but I always look at their chart where I'm like, hmm, you have Mars opposite Saturn.
• 31:21
  Speaker 2: What does that mean For men?
• 31:23
  Speaker 1: I always look at their Mars, what's going on there, and I try to let people tell me their chart, just by being themselves right.
• 31:31
  Speaker 1: But sometimes there's little things in the back of my mind where I'll be like what's your relationship with anger?
• 31:34
  Speaker 1: Just out of curiosity, you know.
• 31:35
  Speaker 2: I feel like that's a question, regardless who you are like does it?
• 31:39
  Speaker 2: You know that's a solid as for friend for anybody.
• 31:42
  Speaker 2: Yeah, what is your relationship to anger?
• 31:44
  Speaker 2: I think that's an important point yeah, and a lot of them.
• 31:48
  Speaker 1: I don't know.
• 31:49
  Speaker 1: It's like sometimes it's there, I don't know, everybody says that they're, they're fine, or I'm just trying to think of like the different responses, but it's usually like along the lines of like oh, I don't really like express my anger like that, like I mean, we all do at some point right.
• 32:02
  Speaker 2: I want to know what happened.
• 32:03
  Speaker 2: Anger is a healthy anger is just as healthy as laughter.
• 32:11
  Speaker 2: Like, we need to be expressing that and so much of our society is is.
• 32:16
  Speaker 2: Like you know, I was told not to show anger and of course that's been big part of my journey of learning to and then supporting other people and expressing it.
• 32:25
  Speaker 2: That doesn't mean go, break a window, it means just get in touch with that fire and that that anger, that fire within you, is so much of your creativity.
• 32:33
  Speaker 2: Actually, if you're suppressing that, what areas of creativity are you suppressing?
• 32:37
  Speaker 2: Right, because the anger is what fuels everything.
• 32:41
  Speaker 2: It's actually at the, at the, at the.
• 32:43
  Speaker 2: It doesn't mean, like you know, go, it's having a healthy relationship with it.
• 32:47
  Speaker 2: You know, I often often I'll share this, but often in my work I help people like, express it through the pillow or like ah, so I see it collectively that it lives in the jaw and so it's a lot of fear around expressing yourself or expressing yourself authentically or truthfully, you know.
• 33:04
  Speaker 2: So it's like, if you're hearing this, like any, if you feel any, any anger come up, because I actually even just talking about it will bring anger up for people.
• 33:10
  Speaker 2: If you're feeling it, just grab your pillow and let it like all out and watch what happens and the jaw might feel a little bit tense and the heart might feel a little compressed, but you know it's like it's.
• 33:20
  Speaker 2: It's part of getting in touch with the range of emotion of humans which is so profound and important.
• 33:27
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I mean sort of like what we're talking about on the live.
• 33:30
  Speaker 1: I just feel like emotionally, whatever that motion is, we're so disconnected.
• 33:35
  Speaker 1: We're not taught that they're all normal, that they're all okay.
• 33:38
  Speaker 1: You know, like my son is a Scorpio rising right, so he does deal with a lot of anger and when I was pregnant with him, I had an experience it was like just really bad fight with his father and and my it was like alien in my stomach.
• 33:50
  Speaker 1: My son was just like, and he didn't really move that much, but this one he was just like trying to get out, he was, and so he is simultaneously like afraid of people's anger.
• 33:58
  Speaker 1: Now he will literally cover his ears if people start fighting, or he's just like, really, you know, I can, I can see that, but he also is dealing with his own internal anger and so I just try and be like it's okay to feel the way that you feel.
• 34:12
  Speaker 1: You know, like, how, like it's more, like, how are we dealing with it?
• 34:14
  Speaker 1: Let's not spit on people, let's not hit a wall, it's not, you know, throw your iPad across the room because you're angry, like, let's find a healthy way to express it, let's paint it.
• 34:24
  Speaker 2: Let's dance yeah.
• 34:31
  Speaker 1: Move it.
• 34:32
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, finding some sort of outlet, because I think you know it's just yeah, we don't know necessarily how to get it out.
• 34:34
  Speaker 1: You know, and I think anger for me, has been one of the big ones where I I have always felt like I can't express myself in whatever capacity, like my opinions were wrong, my thoughts were wrong, my creativity was wrong, like all those things.
• 34:45
  Speaker 1: And you talked about that.
• 34:46
  Speaker 1: Like I had, or I have probably that TMmj and I had like heart palpitations for a long time, and so I think, just one time I was like a few years ago, I was so mad at something and I came home and I was like I had a bat in my room, I like I was hitting my bed and I like punched the wall.
• 35:00
  Speaker 1: I never do stuff like that like my hand was bruised the next day, but like the release I felt after that, I was like whoa yeah, I felt so much lighter.
• 35:08
  Speaker 2: We feel you're holding it.
• 35:09
  Speaker 2: I mean, I can feel it right now.
• 35:11
  Speaker 2: Actually, as we're speaking of it, I know that we can activate it and people.
• 35:14
  Speaker 2: Just with this conversation I can feel like I could go for a release.
• 35:17
  Speaker 2: I feel like also people feel that like it's just one time and then you're done.
• 35:21
  Speaker 2: No, it's constantly like what is coming up for you as we're speaking about this, oh my father, oh, whatever, and I can start feeling it creep up.
• 35:30
  Speaker 2: Oh great, let's go for a release.
• 35:31
  Speaker 2: Just like anything, right, like it's a.
• 35:33
  Speaker 1: It's a way of releasing energy in your body so that you can walk like more, more free, free, like freer of these energies yeah, when I love you said that you can express it through like painting, and you know I think creative arts like we don't necessarily I mean like I know I guess for me I always relate that to like when I'm in a low and that to me isn't always anger, it's more like sadness or grief, like those kind of places.
• 36:00
  Speaker 1: Where is where I find my creativity activates the most.
• 36:02
  Speaker 1: So it's interesting to hear just like to express anger through that way too, because I think anger, I think movement, you know, like moving my body and getting the energy out which I guess any intense emotion can be moved through movement.
• 36:15
  Speaker 2: You know energy is emotion is energy and motion.
• 36:18
  Speaker 2: Right, shaking like I work a lot with shaking, moving, there is an actual shaking therapy, just moving it right.
• 36:27
  Speaker 2: So just releasing, releasing, releasing.
• 36:28
  Speaker 2: And I think, yeah, it doesn't even have to be, because I think mainly people like, oh, painting, I mean I'm not an artist it's like go grab a paintbrush and just like it doesn't matter what it's like, you know, color outside the lines, yeah, you and I mean we talk about my jewelry.
• 36:44
  Speaker 2: That's for me, that's a creative outlet.
• 36:46
  Speaker 2: I work with it's working with the elements, working with fire, working with metal, like just the alchemy that happens in those elements.
• 36:54
  Speaker 2: I put a lot of energy into it.
• 36:56
  Speaker 2: It could be a little anger, like it doesn't matter.
• 36:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah, anger is healthy, you know, anger is healthy yeah, if you're creating a piece and you're feeling anger, how does that translate into the piece?
• 37:06
  Speaker 2: well, it's because it doesn't mean that it's like, oh, I'm mad at somebody.
• 37:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean again going back to the angry as creativity.
• 37:14
  Speaker 2: It's like the fire that's fueling the energy of creation, right, and I think it's a lot about perception.
• 37:20
  Speaker 2: It's like what does anger mean to you?
• 37:22
  Speaker 2: What have you been taught about angry?
• 37:23
  Speaker 2: What you spoke about your son?
• 37:25
  Speaker 2: He experienced anger.
• 37:26
  Speaker 2: In that way, can anger also be a way of releasing?
• 37:31
  Speaker 2: You know, I don't know, I I would have to sit with it.
• 37:33
  Speaker 2: But it is an interesting inquiry of what does it mean for you to sit with anger?
• 37:38
  Speaker 2: Like, what have you been taught?
• 37:39
  Speaker 2: What have you collectively been taught?
• 37:42
  Speaker 2: Can we reframe it as a way of creating or creation?
• 37:46
  Speaker 2: Was the earth created from a place of anger?
• 37:48
  Speaker 2: Is the core of the earth?
• 37:50
  Speaker 2: Angry?
• 37:51
  Speaker 2: Is a volcano.
• 37:53
  Speaker 2: Angry, like what is what?
• 37:55
  Speaker 2: Is it right?
• 37:55
  Speaker 2: It's all about perception and creation yeah, that's so interesting.
• 38:00
  Speaker 1: Yeah, because I mean nature's.
• 38:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know fire, and nature doesn't necessarily mean anger in the way we perceive it.
• 38:06
  Speaker 1: Right, I mean, I think that fire, you know fires and forests and stuff sometimes we have to build anew, we have to have that destruction in order to create, you know, for new things to flourish, and you know if things are like overgrown or I don't know, yeah, that's exactly.
• 38:20
  Speaker 2: Well, and I just so back to my time at the yellowstone, two things animals like just witnessing what happens.
• 38:26
  Speaker 2: When you witness an animal in anger, right Like in survival mode, they're like protecting themselves right, so it's like nature has all of the answers also.
• 38:42
  Speaker 2: And then the pines.
• 38:42
  Speaker 2: What I learned was also that fire opens up the seedlings for the pines to grow like fire.
• 38:44
  Speaker 2: Fire is connected to anger right, so it's like.
• 38:45
  Speaker 2: I love this conversation because you can have many avenues of one thing and we think that, like, we always connect one thing to one definition, but there's many, many, many definitions of how this can look and what this can feel, and how you can explore.
• 39:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah, because my thought was like, do animals experience anger?
• 39:05
  Speaker 1: But then I had to be like, well, but my definition of anger is different.
• 39:08
  Speaker 1: But then I had to be like, well, but my definition of anger is different, because I feel like it would just be like I guess I think of like an animal running from something, but like I guess, like even, like you know, animals fighting for territory, that I guess is anger, territorial for sure I saw a roadrunner holding its territory and it was angry, it was mad, but what was it?
• 39:26
  Speaker 2: It was protecting itself.
• 39:28
  Speaker 2: Right, itself, right, this is my place, my food to go find your own.
• 39:31
  Speaker 2: There's many, many areas.
• 39:33
  Speaker 2: It was angry, but it wasn't like you know.
• 39:35
  Speaker 2: And then it was attacking, but it was also a way of protecting itself.
• 39:39
  Speaker 2: So can anger be also a way to protect ourselves?
• 39:42
  Speaker 2: So is that definition then um expanded into?
• 39:46
  Speaker 2: You know, positive, because you know it's a conversation there, conflict resolution, I mean we can go, but I think, isn't that what anger is, though?
• 39:56
  Speaker 1: right, it's showing us where there's an injustice somewhere, and so we are protecting ourselves in a sense.
• 40:01
  Speaker 1: But it's like, how can we actually express it in a healthy way?
• 40:06
  Speaker 2: yeah, yeah, I mean talking about what's happening in the world collectively right now and there's a lot of anger, and by good, by any good reason, and somewhat because of it's protecting ourselves.
• 40:17
  Speaker 2: It's it's honoring human life.
• 40:19
  Speaker 2: It's bringing life at the forefront of, like you know, human and animal and all life.
• 40:23
  Speaker 2: Actually, it's not just human life, honoring life as a form.
• 40:28
  Speaker 2: So it's an interesting concept here that we're getting to very.
• 40:32
  Speaker 2: We call them the philosophers.
• 40:34
  Speaker 2: We're moving philosophy.
• 40:38
  Speaker 2: I love it.
• 40:39
  Speaker 2: I mean we could spend, yeah, that within itself, just exploring that word, what it means, what it where it can take us really, yeah.
• 40:48
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and it's just yeah, like questioning how we perceive that and how we've taken on for ourselves and getting in touch with it.
• 40:58
  Speaker 2: Yeah, getting in touch with it Really important, because if we have a world suppressing its anger, we are.
• 41:05
  Speaker 2: You know, just imagine the volcano and then explosion and you're like woof, like, and then it just explodes and so it's like don't let it explode, explore it, access it, move it, and we have help, we have healthy, healthy relationship yeah, and I love that.
• 41:24
  Speaker 1: The shaking I don't do it as often as I should.
• 41:26
  Speaker 1: I should, but I don't do it as often as I would like you.
• 41:30
  Speaker 1: I don't do it as often as I would like, you know, because I do think that it really does is a powerful way to move things.
• 41:34
  Speaker 1: And you talk about animals and I've always, you know, heard that example of like an animal.
• 41:36
  Speaker 1: After like that fight or flight moment, they shake and then they let it go.
• 41:40
  Speaker 1: You know, like rabbits and I see we have so many rabbits in our neighborhood, right, and I see them like running around and like stuff like that.
• 41:46
  Speaker 1: But I always think about that.
• 41:47
  Speaker 1: You know, they just like shake and then let it go.
• 41:48
  Speaker 1: They don't hold on to it, right, and we're just over here holding on to that like chronically holding on to that is right yeah that's my work, I mean when I work with bodies, like human bodies, just feeling their body like where are you holding it?
• 42:03
  Speaker 2: mainly most people upper back, upper back head, I mean the head, holy moly, it's like everything that lives there.
• 42:11
  Speaker 2: It's like you're holding, I mean including myself, I hold that.
• 42:14
  Speaker 2: The heart holds everything.
• 42:15
  Speaker 2: So the body is just like absorbing, absorbing, absorbing.
• 42:18
  Speaker 2: And that's where this ease comes in, to the point that you're holding so much that you're not releasing it.
• 42:24
  Speaker 2: Right and grief, anger, know, even joy can be held and captive versus like freedom and expanding in it.
• 42:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 42:35
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 42:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I feel like I can.
• 42:37
  Speaker 1: I don't know that, just the range being such an emotional being, you know like I can get to a point sometimes where I'm so high that I have like just like a natural high, not like any induced, but just like energetically, like I'm so excited.
• 42:49
  Speaker 1: Or I'm so high that I have like just like a natural high, not like any induced, but just like energetically, like I'm so excited, or I'm so happy, or like whatever, and for like a prolonged state, I feel like the effects on my body can be the equivalent of like a low, because I just have so much and I don't know what to do with it and I'm like and I almost like get anxious right Cause I'm just like I need to like move this, I need to get out of it, or I'll be at work and I'm walking around and I just feel like really buzzy, you know, and whether I'm picking that up from somebody else or just from my own being, but it's like.
• 43:20
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I think both of them in either contrasting side is and let's talk about anxiety like that.
• 43:23
  Speaker 2: I've never had anxiety and just recently I had some.
• 43:28
  Speaker 2: Really, or not recently, like maybe a year ago I experienced one would call anxiety.
• 43:34
  Speaker 2: That's crippling, that is like how do you deal with that?
• 43:37
  Speaker 2: And to me that's like energy, just kind of boiling up, boiling up, boiling up, and you don't have a place to actually place it.
• 43:44
  Speaker 2: Right so it's like like it just again pent up energy that doesn't have anywhere to go, and then at that point you're just like releasing it in a in a different way, Right?
• 43:54
  Speaker 2: So it's big energy and some that again collectively we need to kind of address in some, because it's crippling and there's so much of it.
• 44:05
  Speaker 2: There's so much yeah.
• 44:07
  Speaker 1: I dealt with anxiety for a long time like I finally feel like I'm on the other side of it now, where I can be a little bit more present and gentle, and I think it's.
• 44:14
  Speaker 1: But I mean it would, I wouldn't I, I wouldn't do anything, like I wouldn't go anywhere, I wouldn't put myself in situations because all I could think was like it was almost like my body was abandoning me, my heart would race, I would sweat, I would shake, I like I couldn't.
• 44:29
  Speaker 1: And then, of course, I'm like, oh my gosh, everybody can see me, everybody can see my physical reaction.
• 44:33
  Speaker 1: And then they're going to think this and that and it's like I'm not even, and so it just becomes this thing that you can't even control beyond whatever.
• 44:41
  Speaker 1: And so, yeah, I have a lot of compassion for people who chronically deal with that, because it's hard.
• 44:48
  Speaker 2: You've just said it.
• 44:48
  Speaker 2: You've just said it Things I cannot control.
• 44:52
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, and I think that's what kind of like brought me down Right.
• 44:55
  Speaker 1: I mean, other than learning tools to self-regulate, that's been like life-changing, where it's just like breathe, account, something you know, like go to the bathroom.
• 45:03
  Speaker 1: I don't have to like keep myself in the situation, you know, if it's not a, if it's not an actual life threatening situation, like nobody's going to be furious with me if I walk to the bathroom and if they are just calm down.
• 45:17
  Speaker 2: That's the real thing.
• 45:19
  Speaker 2: Why are you dealing with that?
• 45:20
  Speaker 2: Figure out, you don't need to be dealing with that.
• 45:24
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah.
• 45:25
  Speaker 1: But um, yeah, I had a point and I completely lost it.
• 45:28
  Speaker 1: It was what you said.
• 45:29
  Speaker 1: Yeah, things I cannot control.
• 45:32
  Speaker 1: Yes, yes, yes, yes.
• 45:34
  Speaker 1: So that's what I always try and remind myself.
• 45:35
  Speaker 1: Now I'm like in this moment, right now, what can I do about this?
• 45:39
  Speaker 1: And if I can do nothing, then we just need to move on.
• 45:41
  Speaker 1: And also, I think most of the time I don't remember where I read it or heard it or something, but it's always stuck with me where it's just like right now, in this moment.
• 45:51
  Speaker 1: Release the future, release the past.
• 45:53
  Speaker 1: Right now, in this moment, like everything is good, like you know, my belly's full, I'm having a roof over my head, like, and even if I'm not like, like internally, as long as I have that connection with myself, like I'm good.
• 46:05
  Speaker 2: Right, well, and also, you know, depression's the past, anxiety always Right.
• 46:12
  Speaker 2: So if you're living in the future, it's like I don't have this or I don't know.
• 46:16
  Speaker 2: That's future, future, future.
• 46:18
  Speaker 2: What's going on right now?
• 46:18
  Speaker 2: Mainly when I'm dealing with people with anxiety, I bring them back to the present moment.
• 46:23
  Speaker 2: What's like what you're saying, right, where's your breath, where's your heart?
• 46:28
  Speaker 2: Where are the top of your fingers?
• 46:29
  Speaker 2: And it's mainly just a compression of the breath, because they're like so often in the future and they can't control it.
• 46:36
  Speaker 2: And so where do you go?
• 46:37
  Speaker 2: It's this again, this energy that is going so fast that it has nowhere to go.
• 46:43
  Speaker 2: What happens?
• 46:44
  Speaker 2: Anxiety attack right.
• 46:46
  Speaker 2: So releasing that and then becoming really aware of what's happening in your surroundings.
• 46:51
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 46:52
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and I think sometimes it's even just as little as like how is this person going to react to me?
• 46:56
  Speaker 1: It's a very close future, but it's still future, right Cause you're anticipating the way somebody responds, or or you know and you're trying to overthink or like control the situation.
• 47:06
  Speaker 1: You know, and I think, even like people pleasing I used to be, I still struggle with it, but I'm, I'm feel like I'm, I'm trying to get better.
• 47:12
  Speaker 1: But even people pleasing, you know that's like a manipulation of other people's emotions, where it's like I feel like I have to control your emotional response so much to protect myself that I will just do whatever to try and like keep the peace, and it's like, yeah, I think that that knowledge of like I can't control anybody else and that's okay.
• 47:31
  Speaker 1: That's true, yeah, and that kind of goes back to what we were talking about before.
• 47:34
  Speaker 1: It's true, yeah, and it kind of goes back to what we were talking about before.
• 47:36
  Speaker 1: Right, like other people In our experience that can help us heal and show and be safe spaces for us to do that work.
• 47:41
  Speaker 1: Where it's like, okay, I can show up and I can say what I want, I can be my authentic self, I can show up in this space and you're not going to judge me, you're not going to get angry, you're not gonna whatever, or like even having the self-awareness of like if, if that person does get angry, to be able to come back and repair that relationship.
• 47:55
  Speaker 1: You know and I think that's huge in parenting, right, we're going to have anger, we're going to be explosive sometimes, but be able to be like, hey, this is why I reacted that way.
• 48:03
  Speaker 1: You know, like you didn't do anything wrong.
• 48:05
  Speaker 2: Maybe your action was, you know, whatever, but it's unconditional love, everybody's wounds and where wounds are showing up for people right Like I just have a situation currently where it's out of my control and that person is working from a place of fear, you know, and whatever fear showed up to them like, here we are.
• 48:29
  Speaker 2: So it's like I have compassion for you.
• 48:31
  Speaker 2: I'm sorry that this is coming up, I'm sorry this is being triggered and that's all you can do.
• 48:36
  Speaker 2: If people cut you off out of their life, it's mainly wounds showing up.
• 48:43
  Speaker 2: Thank God for people that are holding the space for us to be, for safety, and that, to me, is safe attachment.
• 48:50
  Speaker 2: It's like thank God you can be mad and then they'll still be there.
• 48:55
  Speaker 2: I have that right now in my life as well, and it's such a gift it's.
• 49:01
  Speaker 2: It's it's a safe place, space to explore your shadows.
• 49:04
  Speaker 2: It's a safe space to explore the shadow it really is.
• 49:09
  Speaker 1: And I think it's also this test and ability to be vulnerable, because I think if you can't be vulnerable in that space, you can't possibly show up either.
• 49:18
  Speaker 1: So it's this like multi-challenge of being triggered and then also showing up in the same space, being vulnerable and open.
• 49:27
  Speaker 1: And then, because I mean the first time that you're that you experience it, you don't know how the person's going to respond.
• 49:32
  Speaker 1: I mean, energetically, you can sense somebody, but like you don't know how the person is going to respond.
• 49:36
  Speaker 1: I mean energetically you can sense somebody but like you don't always know in that first conflict how they're going to respond.
• 49:39
  Speaker 1: So I think it's like, especially if you're coming from, you know where you're not not traditionally felt safe, right.
• 49:44
  Speaker 1: So for all the single people listening to this, now you know you're not looking for a person similar to you, you're looking for a person completely opposite to you.
• 49:59
  Speaker 1: Be surprised by the universe, right?
• 50:00
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and I always say, like, even with astrology and human design, when I do readings or people ask about like compatibility, it's like we can make anything work.
• 50:03
  Speaker 1: You know, I think it's just because I don't know, because someone's an aries and someone's a pisces or whatever, I mean, it's, it's all.
• 50:12
  Speaker 1: That's why I think it's like such beautiful information to have, because it's like I can see.
• 50:17
  Speaker 1: Not only can I see how that person is affecting you personally, like psychologically in your life, right, but then it gives you the language and the ability to be like okay, like this is just them, you know also not boxing yourself into it.
• 50:30
  Speaker 2: Cause I know that for myself, like as a projector, like you know that, waiting for the invitation, yes, like I could be here forever waiting for that invitation.
• 50:39
  Speaker 2: But I know that a lot of how I work is like actually setting up the seeds so that that invitation flows smoother, because it's realizing that everybody's different Right, so you have these beautiful maps to help you access those places, but then also remembering that every single person is different.
• 50:56
  Speaker 2: Not all the projectors are the same, not all the.
• 50:58
  Speaker 2: You know like how many manifesting generators I know, they're so different than you right Like that plays into life, experience, ancestral energies.
• 51:07
  Speaker 2: like all of it, we're all very, very, very different, but these maps can help us access that information even quicker which is so beautiful.
• 51:15
  Speaker 1: Yeah Well, I think the projector invitation is deeply energetic as well.
• 51:19
  Speaker 1: It's not necessarily verbal and I think when you're playing in the world of energetics and you can understand when you're actually getting that invitation or not, you know like I think we feel it.
• 51:28
  Speaker 1: I mean, obviously I'm not a projector, so I can't speak to like the feeling of being a projector, but I would think that it is.
• 51:34
  Speaker 1: It is felt on some level, you know, and so I think it's that.
• 51:37
  Speaker 1: Either way, I think it's doing your own work of of being familiar with yourself and getting to know yourself deeply, and I think that's where it's really helpful.
• 51:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, that's beautiful, yeah, so you had said earlier that healing, like the healing path, chose you.
• 51:56
  Speaker 1: So how, how did that come about?
• 52:00
  Speaker 2: Um, yeah, I, I started very early, like when I was 13.
• 52:04
  Speaker 2: Right, so by that time I don't know anyone that was really fully open, like it was not something that was being talked to my friends groups.
• 52:14
  Speaker 2: It wasn't like out.
• 52:15
  Speaker 2: You know, we didn't have Instagram, we didn't have any of those platforms, so I don't know how many people were doing it.
• 52:19
  Speaker 2: Now it's like huge.
• 52:22
  Speaker 2: But you know, as I said, like life circumstances, when I was really young, I would have, I would have, like I would see my grandparents, they would talk to me, things like that, and you know they were, they were dead.
• 52:35
  Speaker 2: So I would come to my mom say things and she was like how do you know?
• 52:38
  Speaker 2: And it's like, oh, yeah, you know I could, I could hear these things.
• 52:41
  Speaker 2: Um, I would feel intensely like that.
• 52:45
  Speaker 2: That was like my, my, my gift and my curse at the same time, when I was younger, because I didn't have the language for it and my parents died at a like really young age and I think them coming back to me in spirit and saying, hey, we're here, we feel you.
• 53:02
  Speaker 2: That started at that age 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18.
• 53:06
  Speaker 2: Mentors started showing up.
• 53:08
  Speaker 2: They started like you have a gift.
• 53:11
  Speaker 2: You have to hone it.
• 53:12
  Speaker 2: And then I started realizing we're all gifted, we all have this Right.
• 53:16
  Speaker 2: But at that age I started honing that, that gift, really strongly, and then accessing that and learning from different first nations and and learning from you know, with and um different mentors as well.
• 53:29
  Speaker 2: I've been really, really, really lucky and I'm very grateful that I have had the mentors that I've had shown up in my life and I really, really believe that that's like they come to you when you're ready and my soul, I think, really came to this experience to activate, learn clear family patterns, clear collective patterns, quickly, like that's, that's kind of what I'm here to do, and and so I think that's why I started.
• 53:54
  Speaker 2: No, I don to do and, and so I think that's why I started.
• 53:56
  Speaker 2: No, I don't think I.
• 53:56
  Speaker 2: I know pretty much.
• 53:57
  Speaker 2: That's why I started very early and, as I said, as I mentioned, I wanted to act and I wanted to be an actress and I wanted to be in movies and and then I quickly, I quickly realized like that, you know, that was my, my ego, self, which is beautiful, and I love my ego and the egos of healthy and and at the same time, my heart comes here for service and humanity.
• 54:18
  Speaker 2: Um, I'm a number nine also, so we're talking about maps, numerals, it's a beautiful one, and it's all about the humanitarian.
• 54:24
  Speaker 2: So it's all what I'm here to do, and I felt that from very, very young, like I've I've seen that I'm going to work with when I am already working.
• 54:32
  Speaker 2: You know, I'm currently working in a project with Ukraine, with women and big groups of people, and I think that it's bringing that energy into a lot of places that don't have access to it.
• 54:43
  Speaker 2: So that's been the vision for a very, very long time, and it's not something that I said.
• 54:48
  Speaker 2: This is what I want to do and this is what I'm going to do.
• 54:50
  Speaker 2: It's like, slowly, the path has opened itself up to be there.
• 54:56
  Speaker 1: Have they been like very obvious, like signs or anything, or you were just like very intentional, or you were just open to like people coming into your life or things coming into your life and not overlooking them?
• 55:10
  Speaker 2: Yes, I've been really grateful also in my soul's acknowledgement flow.
• 55:14
  Speaker 2: I don't really control anything Like I just allow things to show up.
• 55:20
  Speaker 2: So I'm I hear I am very finely attuned to things and so I'm.
• 55:24
  Speaker 2: You know, one of my favorite examples is like you have to be at this coffee shop right now.
• 55:29
  Speaker 2: And it's like, okay, like you have to be at this coffee shop right now, and like I go to the coffee shop, I sit at the bar place and I'm coloring with my pens and comes this, here we are.
• 55:40
  Speaker 2: Ha, it was too much energy.
• 55:41
  Speaker 2: It was too much energy for everybody.
• 55:44
  Speaker 2: Did I just freeze you?
• 55:47
  Speaker 1: did freeze, I know.
• 55:49
  Speaker 2: I'm actually like I'm very hot right now, so that's it's probably a lot of energy.
• 55:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah, no, you were saying about sitting at the coffee shop and then you were like painting it started freezing.
• 56:01
  Speaker 1: I was trying to like get it to un-freeze.
• 56:03
  Speaker 2: Wow See that's what I'm going to do there.
• 56:06
  Speaker 2: Wow, so then, coming in, my mentor coming in and and and you know, case in point, right now, like this energy that's showing up right now is call.
• 56:15
  Speaker 2: That's a big energy.
• 56:16
  Speaker 2: I'm super like there's, I have a lot of heat in my body's energy here and that's where we're headed into this, like what I was finally tuning, that listening where you're not controlling where you need to be, where you need to go, but like really listening to your heart.
• 56:32
  Speaker 2: And that heart is like that connection to source God, whatever you want to call that earth nature, the birds, there's signs everywhere and it's it's.
• 56:42
  Speaker 2: You know, so that coloring, I was coloring and then my mentor showed up.
• 56:46
  Speaker 2: That that's one of my mentor experiences and it's it's being in a state of flow and and it doesn't take much actually, it's just letting the mind quiet so you can listen with your heart.
• 57:00
  Speaker 2: And that heart will just have the access to everything.
• 57:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah, does it come in like a quiet moment when you're intentionally checking in or you're just like going through your day and busy and it just like plops in like go to this coffee shop.
• 57:12
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like a feeling, it's a knowing, like go to this coffee shop.
• 57:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's.
• 57:17
  Speaker 2: It's like a feeling, it's annoying.
• 57:17
  Speaker 2: It's like a.
• 57:18
  Speaker 2: It's like not something that you just it's.
• 57:19
  Speaker 2: It's.
• 57:19
  Speaker 2: It's like somebody's ringing an alarm in my head and me like don't forget this, and beeping in my ears and again, hot heat.
• 57:26
  Speaker 2: It's annoying.
• 57:28
  Speaker 2: It's annoying and it's not so much that I create the space to meditate.
• 57:31
  Speaker 2: Imagine if I meditated every day.
• 57:33
  Speaker 2: I don't fully do that, unfortunately, because I'm moving around so much, but I try to, but it's.
• 57:38
  Speaker 2: It's not like me needing to quiet my mind.
• 57:40
  Speaker 2: It's like suddenly just get a flash of I need to go get pizza here or whatever it is, and then suddenly you just follow that call.
• 57:47
  Speaker 2: A lot of what happens is that people are resisting the call.
• 57:50
  Speaker 2: You know it's.
• 57:52
  Speaker 2: It's like yeah, playing with the field of flow is really, really beautiful.
• 57:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 57:59
  Speaker 2: And we go back to distraction being a big piece of not listening.
• 58:03
  Speaker 2: We're constantly looking here or we're doing that or this, but it can happen at any moment.
• 58:10
  Speaker 2: At any time you could be working at your office and then have this like feeling of like I need to go get lunch right now.
• 58:17
  Speaker 2: Where do I need to go?
• 58:18
  Speaker 2: Right, oh, here we go, you know, and that's, that's a moment of synchronicity and serendipity and magic.
• 58:24
  Speaker 1: It's, it's beautiful yeah, I love that.
• 58:27
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I think it's so easy to like convince ourselves out of it sometimes, like I know I can do that so easily.
• 58:31
  Speaker 1: But like I, what are you gonna say no, go, no?
• 58:35
  Speaker 1: go ahead, go ahead.
• 58:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I was going to say I feel like I've discovered that my abilities come through feeling and it's really confusing because then I'm like what?
• 58:45
  Speaker 1: Like having to decipher what the feeling is or what the message is.
• 58:50
  Speaker 1: Through feeling, it just it's.
• 58:53
  Speaker 1: And I know that.
• 58:55
  Speaker 1: Sitting in meditation, you meditation, activating my chakras every day, I know these practices that work and that help me gain clarity.
• 59:01
  Speaker 1: But if there's some sort of resistance there, I'm like I don't want to sit for 15 minutes or I don't want to sit for 10 minutes.
• 59:06
  Speaker 1: Who's telling you to do that?
• 59:07
  Speaker 1: Why?
• 59:08
  Speaker 2: are you activating your chakras?
• 59:09
  Speaker 2: Your chakras are already activating.
• 59:11
  Speaker 2: I think it's just the stillness of coming into my body, right that, like part of the thing I was going to share is, like you know, we've been told these are the ways.
• 59:21
  Speaker 2: Are they the ways for you?
• 59:23
  Speaker 2: Yeah, are they like, get to know yourself.
• 59:26
  Speaker 2: Well, you were saying that beautifully get to know yourself and get to know what works for you and the feeling is your, your, you know, your at your entry point to that, what happens when there's truth, like, do you get chills?
• 59:41
  Speaker 2: You get, you know.
• 59:41
  Speaker 2: Do you feel hot?
• 59:42
  Speaker 2: Do you feel cold?
• 59:43
  Speaker 2: Like what?
• 59:45
  Speaker 2: What is that language for you, right?
• 59:47
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and there are people that get visions.
• 59:50
  Speaker 2: What is that language?
• 59:51
  Speaker 2: That's the entry point into your intuition and then explore that.
• 59:55
  Speaker 2: You know, because that's for you.
• 59:57
  Speaker 2: It doesn't mean activate my chakras, sitting down and meditating, like what, what does that even mean?
• 1:00:05
  Speaker 2: Let me tell you, rochelle, your chakras are already active.
• 1:00:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah there is something like, but it's quieting the mind a little bit, yeah, and I think that's where yeah, and I think it's quieting the mind a little bit yeah, and I think that's where, yeah, and I think it's that practice of like coming into myself and knowing what I feel, like Right.
• 1:00:22
  Speaker 1: So I think for me, maybe the practice of like grounding or the chakra thing, or running energy through it, is just like the act of like stilling myself.
• 1:00:31
  Speaker 1: I don't know.
• 1:00:33
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and giving yourself permission to change.
• 1:00:36
  Speaker 1: It doesn't fixate it.
• 1:00:38
  Speaker 2: That's another thing that we don't get taught.
• 1:00:40
  Speaker 2: It's like this is the way every day, Some of my practice.
• 1:00:45
  Speaker 2: Everybody's like really You're doing that.
• 1:00:47
  Speaker 2: It's so funny to me when I go do immersions with clients one-on-one, everybody's like ready to give me vegetarian food.
• 1:00:54
  Speaker 2: And you know, I don't drink coffee anymore, but I used to be an avid coffee drinker to tone down a little bit of my feeling.
• 1:01:00
  Speaker 2: But like, imagine I already have this energy.
• 1:01:02
  Speaker 2: Imagine with coffee what I'm.
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 2: But like everybody's prepared to like vegetarian peace, like, and here comes this firecracker.
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 2: I'm like I eat, like I have to eat me, otherwise I, otherwise I'm floating.
• 1:01:14
  Speaker 2: You know, it's like, so it's, it's really realizing what works for you, give it, and then tomorrow I can be vegetarian and I'm going to give myself that option.
• 1:01:23
  Speaker 2: So it's like, if that works for you right now, beautiful, because who you are right now is not going to be who you are tomorrow, and so giving yourself that opportunity to change every single day, that's a way to quiet the mind opportunity to change every single day.
• 1:01:37
  Speaker 1: That's a way to quiet the mind.
• 1:01:38
  Speaker 1: I love that.
• 1:01:39
  Speaker 1: I love that, I think for me, okay, I used to drink a lot and I know that that was me turning the dial down, because if I was having a drink then I wasn't feeling everything, and so it took me a lot to realize that that that was kind of why.
• 1:01:53
  Speaker 1: And so I think, you know, even like this is kind of off topic, I guess, but like we have these things that are perceived as like really bad at society, like don't drink, don't do this, and especially in the spiritual world, you know where we're trying to like be a certain way, like we have all these messages and yeah, like sit and meditate and activate your chakras, like whatever Right, but like don't drink, don't do this.
• 1:02:17
  Speaker 1: Sorry about making fun of anybody.
• 1:02:18
  Speaker 1: I don't mean to no, but I think, like we, when we come into this we don't know what to do right.
• 1:02:23
  Speaker 1: We know that there's something deeper, we feel it, we felt that, we've had senses of it.
• 1:02:25
  Speaker 1: We know that we have this like power and innate ability, but we don't know how to access it Right, cause, like the messaging is so, I mean, like when I was younger, I had I'm also human as I'm, I'm a six three is my profile which is 100% chaos in the twenties, like there's no rhyme or reason.
• 1:02:39
  Speaker 1: It's just like failure and this and that, and I think just the drinking was part of that process and it was a part to to make myself feel like I could fit in with people, cause otherwise I just want I I've always been.
• 1:02:49
  Speaker 1: I wasn't like I never saw anything when I was younger.
• 1:02:53
  Speaker 1: I never necessarily, I'm sure I did Like I had feelings and things like that that I didn't understand, but, like I've always, I grew up internationally, I grew up in the middle East, and so I've always been fascinated by spirituality and by different cultures and people, and so that's always been like, uh, something in me that's always been active.
• 1:03:11
  Speaker 1: I've always known.
• 1:03:12
  Speaker 1: There was something deeper, but I had no idea what it was, cause I engaged with so many different people.
• 1:03:16
  Speaker 1: But, like I don't know, coming to like figure that out and and having to like sift through all the rights and wrongs of things Like the perceived rights.
• 1:03:23
  Speaker 2: That's that six Right.
• 1:03:24
  Speaker 1: Cause I have that.
• 1:03:25
  Speaker 2: I have that six.
• 1:03:26
  Speaker 1: What's your six to?
• 1:03:27
  Speaker 1: four, six four, that I love.
• 1:03:37
  Speaker 1: That are you about the world?
• 1:03:37
  Speaker 1: I believe what the six is all about the world, well, it's a role model, right.
• 1:03:39
  Speaker 1: So it's always like like observing, like now I've noticed so much, like I before I engage in six, three, I mean, it's just like a weird profile too, because we're just sort of like I don't know, but I watch people.
• 1:03:47
  Speaker 1: Before I engage with people, like I'll watch them for a while because it's like I know how I show up energetically and I guess I want to, like I want to get a taste of your energy too before I decide that we're going to, you know, exchange it.
• 1:04:02
  Speaker 1: So like I'm very much like the observer and it's interesting as the four, six right, cause that four is like so sociable, it's all about your network and your opportunities.
• 1:04:12
  Speaker 1: And then you have this six line.
• 1:04:12
  Speaker 1: That's like okay.
• 1:04:13
  Speaker 1: So I think like after 30, then you just become more, maybe, particular about who you're engaging with and who you're interacting with.
• 1:04:19
  Speaker 2: For sure, I love that about maturing and aging.
• 1:04:22
  Speaker 2: It's like the most beautiful thing.
• 1:04:23
  Speaker 2: I don't know why people are afraid of it.
• 1:04:25
  Speaker 2: It's.
• 1:04:25
  Speaker 2: I cannot wait to be 80.
• 1:04:27
  Speaker 2: I'm like, and bring on the wrinkles please.
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 2: Yes, I grew, I like I, I, you know I, I was born with wrinkles.
• 1:04:35
  Speaker 2: I feel ancient, so it's like.
• 1:04:37
  Speaker 2: Sometimes I look at myself, I'm like something's not matching here, but I I think it's being particular also about, yeah, who, who you're, who you're sharing energy with, but that's huge.
• 1:04:49
  Speaker 1: that's huge yeah, yeah, I just I turned 38 this year and something about that number like was really challenging.
• 1:04:57
  Speaker 1: But then, like after, after, after I like got over it.
• 1:04:59
  Speaker 1: Now I'm like I don't, I just I don't even feel it.
• 1:05:01
  Speaker 2: So you know, it's like day over 34, 33, 34.
• 1:05:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and 38 is a really beautiful number it's 11.
• 1:05:10
  Speaker 1: So it's mastery mastery and you know it's, it's also, um, what do you call it?
• 1:05:17
  Speaker 1: Notal return.
• 1:05:17
  Speaker 1: So this year has just been like really challenging in so many ways, Cause it's like I'm an Aries North node, so I'm being asked to then be called this like self-leadership space and I'm like it's so scary, but like also it's I can't like avoid it anymore.
• 1:05:28
  Speaker 1: You know it's just like continues to come around, but yeah, what is your?
• 1:05:33
  Speaker 1: Do you have aquarius prominent in your, in your chart?
• 1:05:36
  Speaker 2: moon okay, do you have taurus?
• 1:05:39
  Speaker 2: I was a taurus in a past life, okay, I believe.
• 1:05:43
  Speaker 2: I've been told many times by different astrologers, so I come in with the earthy.
• 1:05:47
  Speaker 1: I attract taurus like crazy yeah me as a taurus that I'm a taurus son's why I asked like you.
• 1:05:54
  Speaker 1: I just feel very like Taurus energy from you which makes sense.
• 1:05:57
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I know you from the back of my the palm of my hand.
• 1:06:01
  Speaker 2: Like my sister, my all of my best friends were Tauruses, taurus, taurus, taurus, taurus, everywhere.
• 1:06:07
  Speaker 1: Wow.
• 1:06:07
  Speaker 2: Science Taurus is all of them, yeah.
• 1:06:10
  Speaker 1: What's your sun in rising, if you don't mind?
• 1:06:17
  Speaker 2: Scorpio and Gemini.
• 1:06:18
  Speaker 2: Okay, so scorpio, uh, sun gemini, rising gemini, rising interesting interesting energy.
• 1:06:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I love it, though polar opposites like my six, my four, six.
• 1:06:24
  Speaker 2: It's like I'm learning.
• 1:06:25
  Speaker 2: I come here, that richard rudd says that I come here to learn polarity and it's very like you know, not to bring politics in, but but I'm like I'm not, I'm take out the politics out of this, but I swing from left to right Like I try to understand both sides.
• 1:06:41
  Speaker 2: Why not?
• 1:06:42
  Speaker 2: Like I put myself in very tricky situations I learned so much from I think that is the answer to flow.
• 1:06:50
  Speaker 2: It's like I put myself in situations that I'd be very uncomfortable by, and then I learn, I learn, and then it's like, oh, wow, breakthrough, right, yeah.
• 1:07:00
  Speaker 1: But that's the Aquarius too, right, like embedding themselves into something to understand it, in order to shift or change, or realize what's working, what's not working, or where they really want to pivot and go right, and it's for everyone, so that you can then support other people and and sort of like you said, like the people who are on like the outskirts of it or who don't quite fit in.
• 1:07:20
  Speaker 1: It's like you have a home for them.
• 1:07:21
  Speaker 1: It's beautiful.
• 1:07:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah, all religions, all people's, all backgrounds.
• 1:07:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah, there's, I love it very little.
• 1:07:28
  Speaker 2: I mean, I have been working with judgment, but judgment towards itself that's usually the judgment I have, but when it comes to somebody else I usually don't.
• 1:07:36
  Speaker 2: Like I've been releasing a lot of the judgment.
• 1:07:38
  Speaker 2: It's like I started off with a lot because I created a parent that was very judgmental, um, and so I learned that.
• 1:07:46
  Speaker 2: And then now it's my whole path has been about releasing judgment and it's like that's what it is yeah.
• 1:07:51
  Speaker 1: Well, I think we're judging others.
• 1:07:53
  Speaker 1: We're really judging ourselves Always.
• 1:07:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 1:07:58
  Speaker 1: Well, thank you so much.
• 1:08:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah, we went from nature to judge.
• 1:08:03
  Speaker 1: I know we went all over the place.
• 1:08:05
  Speaker 1: I love it though.
• 1:08:06
  Speaker 2: Whether you can access in an hour is incredible.
• 1:08:09
  Speaker 2: I know, right it really is when, what?
• 1:08:13
  Speaker 1: where can people find you?
• 1:08:14
  Speaker 1: How can they work with you?
• 1:08:15
  Speaker 1: And I know you said that you're opening the community publicly soon, right?
• 1:08:19
  Speaker 1: So if you want to talk a little bit about that, yes, thank you.
• 1:08:22
  Speaker 2: Well, my website is my name and last name and there's offerings there, one-on-ones, but I'm really moving, as we're moving planetarily and collectively into this community kind of mindset.
• 1:08:31
  Speaker 2: So I've been, I'm going to be, running more workshops and retreats and more collective community work.
• 1:08:36
  Speaker 2: I mean, I always love one-on-ones and I've been doing it for almost 15 years.
• 1:08:41
  Speaker 2: So that's like where my like, where I come from, and I'm moving into more spaces of community and activating and highlighting.
• 1:08:50
  Speaker 2: So I started a year ago a community called global circles and we're soft launching now and due out in the world here in october, I think, exactly a year from when it started, um, and it's called global circles and it's on instagram and also on my website as well.
• 1:09:10
  Speaker 1: so, yeah, that's me, and it's this beautiful aquarian community right yeah, yeah, very much about supporting each other.
• 1:09:17
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's amazing yeah.
• 1:09:20
  Speaker 2: I feel like sometimes, with communities like this, there's like a leader at the center and I really believe that we're all the leaders and how can we work together and amplify each other's message?
• 1:09:29
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:09:30
  Speaker 2: We have one breath workout a month and then one circle a month where we come in with questions and we'll have dance and then we'll have constantly.
• 1:09:37
  Speaker 2: Well, the idea as we launch is that we bring in speakers and people to come teach as well.
• 1:09:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah, oh yeah, it's this beautiful supportive community and energy all heart-centered.
• 1:09:51
  Speaker 2: Lots of heart, yes, lots of.
• 1:09:54
  Speaker 1: It's amazing well, thank you so much again for being here yeah, thank you.
• 1:10:01
  Speaker 2: What a what a treat.
• 1:10:02
  Speaker 2: It's been really really beautiful, thank you.