Latest / Rabbi Moshe Haber - Daily Mussar/Weekly Perasha / Rabbi Moshe Haber Perashat Vayishlah-The Perfection of Lebado: Humble Confidence 12.5.25

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Rabbi Moshe Haber Perashat Vayishlah-The Perfection of Lebado: Humble Confidence 12.5.25 · Rabbi Moshe Haber - Daily Mussar/Weekly Perasha

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  Sha like do this on Friday morning.
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  I want to pull out the theme, the mindset of Alcoa Vito as
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  follows. He's about to face off with ESA
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  and just build it up and your mind.
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  ESAF has been wanting to kill him for 20 years, so I was
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  waiting for this moment. Alcoa Vino pretty much took
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  everything from him and ESAF's eyes so this is a real face off
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  now he told us a line page 17 you'll be here.
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  He told us a lie and he told us a lie in the most perfect way
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  possible and I think it's actually be the exact frame
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  frame of mind that a Jew should always have.
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  What is it? He sends messengers to his
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  salvage. He tells these messengers angels
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  told his salves home when you tell about on the more he tells
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  the messengers to tell it sounds the following line and this line
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  includes this perfect fairline call Tom Luna Donila ESA.
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  So you should tell your master ESA.
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  I want you to tell my master, my master ESA Korma of the Hayakov.
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  These are the words of your servant Nako in Lavangharti by
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  Hirata. I've been living by Lavan and
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  I've waited until now and then he says and I have a heli.
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  I have with me shore the hamor, an oxen, a donkey, sheep and
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  servants maize, and I'm sending them to you.
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  I'm sending to you to find favor in your eyes.
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  That is a short message that the messengers, which are angels
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  should tell aside. Now, by the way, as an aside, an
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  important point to know regarding the entire is that
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  although they are called being whose process and tactics are
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  considered the finest tactics ever when it comes to an enemy,
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  he's considered the literally the rule book of how to go
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  textbook of how to deal and make peace with people around you.
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  At the same time, the Madash says certain things that I
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  called you did are questionable starters.
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  Opening up the dialogue with yourself.
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  Sending angels to yourself first was debatable.
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  Bowing down to yourself when he finally meets him also debatable
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  because maybe it's going too far.
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  First of all, sending Angels older brother so he has to deal
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  with the other brother thing. Guess what, that's just we had
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  to. I saw a friend of mine I caught
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  me talking to. OK, so we'll play that in a
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  second now. But first, the old role opening
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  up of trying trying to make peace, assuming that there's an
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  ongoing fight, even though I saw did hate him, but assuming
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  there's an unknown issue. Madar says they caught the Marie
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  Marie blower lawyers getting involved in a fight that didn't
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  really fully exist when I called me and I thought it did because
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  based in the past and he knew I saw it was upsetting to him
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  going down my dash. He shouldn't have been opened
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  up. But once he opened up his
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  tactics perfect and the perfect mindset.
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  I believe for a person to think we're dealing with other people.
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  Take that line that he says in Lavan Gharti.
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  I've lived by Lavan and I waited until now, but she says 2
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  points. Paul officer points in Lavan
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  Gharti means a saw. You need to know I've been a
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  Gare. I've been a wanderer by Levan
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  all these years, which means I didn't really strike a big don't
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  think in your mind yourself and I Aqua I'm a big deal.
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  They need to be jealous of. We need to hate.
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  I was by Levan all these years. I was delayed all these years.
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  I was waiting until now. But don't feel bad.
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  I never really became a major deal by Levan.
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  That's part number one. At the same time he says in
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  Lavan gharati Rashi writes that means tariyag mitzvah jomarti.
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  I followed Hashem, I followed Ghazwadi even while I was by
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  Lavan. 2 separate points. 1 is that I was by this man's house
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  all this time telling you it's up, but you should know, I know
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  that they can't a big deal. Two, I was there and I kept
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  Hashem's way the whole way through two separate messages.
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  How does this relate to Assaf? What is that quality of his
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  friend of mine? What's the goal of here?
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  This, I believe, is the key, how to toe the line, put in the
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  perfect way. On the one hand, he's displaying
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  your mood. He's telling Assaf nothing to
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  see here, nothing to be jealous of, nothing to hate, and not a
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  big deal. Nothing to worry about, as he's
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  telling Assaf all right. At the same time, he's telling
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  maybe Assaf or maybe even himself.
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  That doesn't mean I'm nothing. That doesn't mean I'm a zero.
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  I am striking 1000. I'm batting 1000 when it comes
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  to my life and the kind of life I want to live.
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  I am extremely humble, but I'm also extremely confident.
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  I am not interested in impressing or creating jealousy
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  in the eyes of an ace of but that does not mean I'm going to
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  peel away from my own self-confidence.
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  It does not mean I'm going to consider myself a weak person or
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  a person who's unsuccessful. No, no, I'm very successful.
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  She's not in the kind of success that is solved with jealous of
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  not the kind of success will get in yourself nervous.
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  So he tells yourself I listen. I was a wanderer by Levine.
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  In other words, I didn't strike it big in the ways that you care
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  about but in the ways that I care about.
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  You should know whether yourself cares or not I'm good.
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  I did great. I thank God I'm great, as is a
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  very important point for all of us.
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  We run our families, run our own mind.
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  We try to be humble. We try not to stick it to other
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  people or to stick out to other people or to get other people
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  nervous and jealous and hateful. But at the same time, you don't
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  want to be on Z case. At the same time, you want to
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  have a lot of things that make you very proud because you're on
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  a different track and those who can be jealous of you.
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  Your track is I'm successful in the areas that I care about that
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  I care for myself to care about, not for other people to worry
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  about and you can have two tracks at the same time toward
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  others. Nothing to see here told
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  yourself I'm doing great and that is a track alcohol, you
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  know as his minds like he does this a few times.
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  So the angels come back and they tell him, listen, a salve is
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  coming. He has 400 men.
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  Good luck. He's coming and he's built up an
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  army and this is very scary. He called me no praise and his
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  prayer he tells God I am made small by all the gifts that you
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  gave me. I recognize the fact that I'm
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  blessed doesn't ignore the fact that he's blessed.
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  He recognizes the fact that he says I started off with only I
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  crossed to Jordan the first time with a stick.
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  I had nothing. I came across when I left my
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  parents house with nothing and now I have two camps.
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  So he is accepting and recognizing that he blessed but
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  itself doesn't need to know itself does not need to care.
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  I am blessed God. I recognize with you that I'm
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  blessed. That's what he said Karen, and
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  he starts to send gifts to Asabi.
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  He's playing into an ASAB mine on the side He knows what does
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  he do? He sends gifts.
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  Basuk says these words like flattering.
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  He's playing into Asaf's eyes completely flatter.
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  What does he do? In fact, Yaakov keeps using the
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  language I am your serving you my minister to this up in the
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  message and Iman says that he was.
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  That's a challenge of too much, but the mindset he's trying to
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  play into his sub's brain. If his sub does notice my
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  success, it's hard time not to notice.
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  Aqua Arena was the wealthiest man around.
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  He was the most successful man around and he'd the best family
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  around. It's hard for his sub not to
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  notice. But he was living by law during
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  that time. I love and he accumulated all
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  that, yes. But at the end he committed it
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  all, so you know, hard to avoid his sub's eyes.
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  So he does. He tries to play into his sub
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  and this is a great trick and that is he starts to send gifts,
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  his language, which is you're my mess, I'm your servant is
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  whatever wealth that I have. Whenever you are there, notice
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  you own it because I'm your servant.
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  This is all playing in the South's brain because I'm your
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  servant. The more wealth that I do have
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  that gets you nervous. You shouldn't get you nervous
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  because it's a part of you. I am your servant.
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  That's completely a trick. But then he starts to play with
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  himself. Eyes.
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  How do you play with yourselves? Eyes, do you recognize that?
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  If I have to send them gifts, it's a Pisa.
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  He sends gifts. The gifts are sent with a little
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  bit of space for teenage gifts. He tells these messenger, you
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  travel. First group goes in a certain
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  amount of animals. The second group follows behind,
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  but they leave a little space. I leave a little space.
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  Why just come one at the other at the other?
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  Why have one shipment of goods and then a couple of minutes
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  later, further down the road, another shipment of animals,
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  another shipment. Why have they?
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  As she tells us, it was a classic play on the air.
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  SOB ice and we'll get back to you.
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  I call this friend of mine in a minute.
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  Is you Socket alive at this point?
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  His hawk is alive, yes, but he's considered like you're not.
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  I think so. He sends towards yourself this
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  gift and his steps because he knows and his SOB die, just want
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  to see more. So he gets a gift.
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  He looks down the road and he sees another one coming, exactly
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  the same thing. And he's thinking to himself and
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  his salve's brain is thinking. It's never ending as far as my
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  eye can see. There's more coming.
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  And at Covas playing into that, she's Shylock.
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  He's feeding into It's OK. He's feeding into that brain of
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  an Assad, which is a different kind of mind.
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  A mind that wants a mind is the exact opposite of mind that
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  wants everything, that thinks everything is coming to him.
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  I think she deserves it all. I think she's the master.
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  Akova's playing into that as well at the same time.
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  So he's calling her my master. He's sending him gifts in his
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  steps, right? But on his own frame of mind,
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  he's very clear. I do not need other people to
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  see my wealth or to feel jealous of me.
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  So to them, I have what I had. I need on the all at the same
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  time myself to feel extremely confident and secure and happy
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  with what I had to to myself and my chalk.
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  I'm blessed and that is a frame every one of us needs to have
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  carry these two steps at the same time.
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  I don't need others to be busy with me, but I need myself to be
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  very busy with myself. I can be at the same time and
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  she me humble and she me self confident.
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  That's how call me his trick and he does it over and over again.
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  I'll give you another example. What a big example, perfect
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  example, and had a little like with social media age, right?
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  Exactly. This is all a challenge.
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  So is he marketing or is it real?
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  Which part? Yeah, I'll call him.
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  I'm saying is he like walking to Sr. like or?
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  Which part sending the gifts, balcony, that stuff in
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  marketing, all this is all like sending the gifts and calling
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  him my master was all marketing because as Salve believed as
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  Salve's friend of mine originally was older brother.
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  In the old days, the older brother meant the master
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  literally. It's not like that today.
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  In those days the older brother meant the master and I called
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  was playing into that brain obey a sub and saying you're my
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  behold, you're there for my master, I'm your servant all the
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  all that I have is yours is all that's all part of the sketch,
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  but his own friend of mine is very clear what?
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  Had this. I didn't change because one
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  generation back. It was like that.
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  I mean, now we're talking. Father in Israel he was.
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  He was the like. Like more than my grandfather of
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  the house. How did it change?
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  It might be Americanized. They change.
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  It might be because the older brothers play there with my my
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  family. I have an older.
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  Brother the youngest, always. Tell me the youngest right We
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  have a lot of examples with the seconds and the youngest I
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  always hold off like because of the 7th kids but but in my
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  family and you got very my family the oldest is great but
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  not like that and my kids my oldest is a daughter and my kids
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  aren't allowed to be that way either because I don't want to
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  think because it's just creates whatever but in those days two
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  years in Martinson I think it's but run the house but in that
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  dollar to grow yeah but in in in those days that oldest also
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  carry a lot more burden. Also I saw had to be probably
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  the reason why I saw that he would have earned his degree
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  might be partially from that responsibility.
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  They're responsible. They can family the light back
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  to see what, 20-30 years old and there's a lot of the next one
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  up. There's a lot of differences
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  from the years ago to today, not just this one.
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  Because. I know what you talk to me
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  about, I know what they say about that.
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  But definitely he's continuing his ISAB still hates him, that's
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  for sure. I definitely built.
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  So this is the play. So there are two plays happening
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  over there. Yaakov is playing exactly 2
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  plays a man. Yaakov is playing with his own
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  mind and is Yaakov is playing with his size mind.
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  Do we see those two points? His own mind.
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  He's having this perfect balance, which is as I does not
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  need to care about me and I'm too busy with me at all times.
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  But I am very confident myself. That's his own framework.
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  Totally. The Saab.
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  Oh, he's playing in on all the nonsense.
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  You're my master. You're my leader.
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  I mean, I'm I'm second to you. All that's going on.
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  OK, now he's giving. Kids.
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  But he doesn't believe it for a minute.
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  That none of that stuff. Does he ever believe that his
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  Saab is his master? Absolutely not.
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  Because that would mean that he subjugated his way of life and
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  that's definitely not the case ABS zero of that.
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  So these two things happen at the same time.
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  Now I come to a moment where the how cough splits his camp.
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  Then the bazook says this is a little battle that happens.
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  There's a battle Kutina Akova and ish.
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  But these words vyava tere akova levador, he was left alone,
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  Vyavec ish imor and a man struggled with him, wrestled
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  him. ADA lotta Shah until the morning
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  time as she tells us who is this man as she says it was an Angel.
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  There are a lot of points I bring out from this wrestle of
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  Yaquavi. That was human being.
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  It's a physical. It was a physical representation
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  of an Angel. It was a person representing an
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  Angel. Sometimes you have all the Allen
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  of these stories or you have as a person, right?
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  Akova Vinu was a person representing an Angel.
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  I'm sorry, Akova was facing a person that was represent that
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  was an Angel. And this Angel is the Angel of
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  Aesop right there Got that is Angel of Aesop, and they're in
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  this wrestling match. Good.
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  So the bumps and it's like it's conscience.
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  Somebody that exact would say in this wrestling match I got
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  called, but you know beats him. What how does the wrestle
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  happen? There's a lot to this.
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  This is but if I tell you I called him about door I started
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  because he was left alone. Let's play this out left alone
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  seems like I called I had to go back for a moment to get more
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  stuff and he left his family while they're traveling toward
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  yourself. He left alone for a minute,
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  right? And because he's left alone,
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  that's when they battle each other now.
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  What's that? When you by itself, you get that
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  very good. So now left alone seems like
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  left alone seems like he was at a vulnerable state.
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  So you had to fight the Angel. That's what it reads good.
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  The reality is the deeper point is the left alone really meant
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  going to Medasha, going to the Gemara, etcetera.
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  Akavina was at his highest point in life when he was alone.
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  At this point, he had hit a spiritual point that's better
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  than anyone else can ever reach the point of livador.
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  What is this mental state of livador and why is this a state
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  that he can struggle with? The Angel of his out livador
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  means that he doesn't believe that he needs anyone else to
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  make him feel good. He doesn't believe he needs
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  everyone else's respect to make him do a big deal.
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  He doesn't need to come out to anybody.
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  It's an extremely, I believe, the most perfect for your mind,
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  which is confident but humble, which means right here
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  everything exists in my mind, but at the same time I'm alone.
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  I don't need others to give me accolades.
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  I don't need others to bring your parents by me.
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  That is the level of livaldo. That's the perfect stage.
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  And at that stage that only one you need with you is God, a Jew.
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  In fact, the Madash says Livaldo is like Hashem, well, not 100%
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  like Hashem, because Hashem is alone and he has this obviously
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  confidence, if you call it that, obviously doesn't need anyone in
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  a sense if you call it that, but he doesn't need anyone else.
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  We all live our door with Hashem and I will live our door and our
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  friend of mine and our head and our family's head.
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  I believe she'll always be at this point.
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  Are we in our home? Very, excuse me, very confident,
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  Very much. Do we feel we're living life the
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  right way? Sure do we need to stick it to
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  other people not at all. We need to do our thing with the
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  feel content and not put it in their face.
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  Now Carlia was doing exactly that by the process of Levador.
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  So to an Assad a no big deal or nothing.
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  Even when he faces he finally meets Assad after this wrestling
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  match, he finally meets Assad himself.
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  And Assad says who gave me all this?
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  What he goes alcohol says God blessed your servant myself with
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  all this. He makes it very small.
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  That's where it really came from.
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  And his son says, let's go together now and says little
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  Charlie, of course my kids, they're weak.
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  They're small, they're little. They can't walk.
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  I'll walk a little behind you. And he walks behind him and he's
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  still he's still trailing is up right?
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  Still going out on that is suck, huh?
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  Until this very day. But this is the frame of mind.
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  The frame of mind starts shopping in Lavangarthi, which
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  means I my mind. I was very successful by Lavand.
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  I kept her. I kept Mitts fault.
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  I kept my family Great. But in your standards, I'm no
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  big deal. I know I might have some wealth.
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  It's not anything you want. I know I might have some
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  prominence, I was still a wanderer.
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  But he didn't want a self to care about that blessing at all.
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  So he told the line in the perfect way, the way of Levador.
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  Levador is the way every you should live in.
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  My own home should be rolling. My kids should feel like our
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  house is the best. But that does not mean that
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  everyone else needs to know, hear, and feel that way as well.
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  I'll give you the process exactly.
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  Levador literally meets her alone.
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  Does this make sense to us? A friend of mine, right?
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  This is the vanguard. I think we all tried the frame
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  of mind. Let me give you this.
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  This. There's no one in the same idea.
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  There's no one but God. God is alone.
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  That wasn't this at the end of the Tavila.
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  And obviously do it. They bring prayers.
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  I think you might not aided, right?
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  So they ask the prayer is I ask Hashem.
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  Shalotallah cannot akrem a lie. Nobody should be jealous of me.
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  You're asking a shame for that. And I, you shouldn't be jealous
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  of them. Naturally if nobody's jealous of
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  me, you know I usually means I got 2 left feet when it comes to
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  anything. Now if I'm a basketball player,
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  no one does to me. He's like can't he came high
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  school, right? If I'm in business and no one
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  does to me and he's like, I don't know how to work yet.
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  But how do I get to a point that nobody's jealous of me and I, I
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  don't know why I'm not jealous of them.
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  That's very difficult. That's because I told the
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  perfect line and it's a line that we all do try to tell.
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  It's a line that's difficult to tell.
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  Sometimes people like to, as they call it, flex or they want
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  to call it. But we all have realized over
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  time we're better off this way because we're content with our
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  families, a hobby, with our own stage in life, and we do it this
• 20:07
  way. This is the exact idea.
• 20:09
  I shouldn't get angry. No one should get angry at me.
• 20:11
  It's all this. And then the next thing you lie
• 20:13
  is God should bless me. I am a long life, life of peace.
• 20:18
  Life of goodness, life of blessing, life of Panasatova,
• 20:21
  life of everything. So how am I going to get that
• 20:23
  and have no one else to me? Answer is I adopt A Livador fair
• 20:28
  of mine. The Livador fair of mine is I am
• 20:31
  very, very unshare. I don't stick it to other
• 20:34
  people, in fact. Humility and confidence.
• 20:37
  Is the one thing humility and Co person can be both.
• 20:40
  And I've said this a many times, every great person that we've
• 20:43
  had has been batting 1000 when it comes to humility and batting
• 20:48
  1000 when it comes to confidence.
• 20:51
  Classic example after example of the greats.
• 20:54
  They all did this perfectly. So this came to my mind this
• 20:56
  morning when I'm thinking about Alpha Shah and I called, you
• 20:59
  know, toeing the line in front of yourself and somehow avoiding
• 21:03
  jealousy and avoiding hate and avoiding fights.
• 21:05
  It's because it's my and how we we have to do this and we try,
• 21:08
  we continue to try it. In Lavangardi, I was a stranger.
• 21:12
  You do the best you can. You can't control, no, they are
• 21:16
  the people, but you can do the best you can to to keep it in
• 21:20
  you a. 100% this is all something I know.
• 21:22
  This doesn't mean, this doesn't mean, to be very clear, this
• 21:24
  doesn't mean a guy can have a shop car.
• 21:26
  It doesn't mean a guy can have a nice house.
• 21:27
  And it doesn't mean all those basic things does not mean that
• 21:30
  all that's all not the point. That's not the, but not the low.
• 21:35
  So that the lower level of. What we're talking about.
• 21:38
  Because the guy who's really livador, he doesn't need the
• 21:40
  car. Agreed, but it's very all that.
• 21:43
  Stuff is super. With you, Yeah, but he likes it.
• 21:45
  It's very hard to reach out. There, it's not.
• 21:48
  Bad. It's not bad.
• 21:50
  But he's just not there. The kind, The kind.
• 21:52
  And it's a real thing. You know, they say, oh, you put
• 21:54
  on a nice, you feel like $1,000,000, this is all stuff to
• 21:58
  get you to the next place. So you just have to recognize
• 22:02
  what these things are that exist in the world.
• 22:05
  Yeah, I'm not saying it's easy item, but you know, once you
• 22:08
  could say, all right, you know what?
• 22:10
  Yeah, there's a it was a very wealthy guy in the community for
• 22:13
  years. But my father in law's friend
• 22:15
  owns half of a night and and they went this hell driving an
• 22:18
  old Honda Freyos and he's laughing at the work and the and
• 22:23
  he could see I don't need anything.
• 22:25
  And that always resonates in my Masha because everyone knows
• 22:30
  that that guy could buy Honda, the company.
• 22:32
  You know, we all, honey, a lot of times those people are cooler
• 22:35
  than everyone else when they have and everyone knows really
• 22:38
  they have and they pull that streak.
• 22:39
  They do it on purpose and they, they, they throw a simple way,
• 22:42
  right? Or that's only somebody because
• 22:44
  they can. Some people are just cheap too,
• 22:46
  you know, invest, there's invest, they'll invest a billion
• 22:49
  dollars in business, but they, oh, I'm not buying.
• 22:51
  I'm not buying this all. Right, I will say so that being.
• 22:55
  Cheap on the looking ahead punch after the sticks now what
• 23:00
  setting don't make. The real island is who's
• 23:04
  looking. This is our point of like.
• 23:07
  The things you buy, it's. It's really Somebody want to
• 23:15
  this Sonic?