Latest / Darren “Whackhead” Simpson’s prank calls on Kfm Mornings / Senseless Survey: Testing the limits of random questions

Transcript

Senseless Survey: Testing the limits of random questions · Darren “Whackhead” Simpson’s prank calls on Kfm Mornings

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: You go and we go.
• 0:01
  Speaker 2: Here's another senseless survey from Darren Wackhead Simpson on KFM Mornings.
• 0:07
  Speaker 3: KFM Mornings. Okay, docks gather around the most important questions
• 0:12
  Speaker 3: being asked at the G twenty this weekend will be
• 0:20
  Speaker 3: tested here. Okay. This is where I ask a random
• 0:23
  Speaker 3: person a bunch of questions and when they eventually get frustrated,
• 0:27
  Speaker 3: they put the phone down. Your challenges to see how
• 0:29
  Speaker 3: many questions I get through? All right, children, how many
• 0:31
  Speaker 3: questions will I ask this morning?
• 0:34
  Speaker 2: Nine questions?
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  Speaker 3: Sis, eleven questions, eleven Ramis Khan twelve questions, twelve questions?
• 0:43
  Speaker 3: Yea producer? Bread fifteen? Who is that time? Got records
• 0:51
  Speaker 3: to break?
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: Oh?
• 0:54
  Speaker 3: I love it? You say it with like such little enthusiasm. Yeah,
• 0:59
  Speaker 3: that was all mine. You the guide work that rocks
• 1:02
  Speaker 3: up to go. I gotta do this today.
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: And there's no there's no reward at the end of it.
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: Give him all my guesses and he gives me that.
• 1:14
  Speaker 3: What time is lunch? Why won't my Facebook login? No?
• 1:24
  Speaker 3: Is the company banned Facebook again? That's where you lost.
• 1:30
  Speaker 3: They just plucked your Okay, one of the four of
• 1:36
  Speaker 3: you are correct, So well done. Okay, thank you. And again,
• 1:44
  Speaker 3: the price here is we get to spend the wheel
• 1:47
  Speaker 3: and you get what you get. It's a brilliant price
• 1:53
  Speaker 3: by a small business here in the Western k All right,
• 1:55
  Speaker 3: so here is this morning's senseless.
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: Survey except good morning, Good morning, ma'am.
• 2:03
  Speaker 3: I'm making three one nine six two. I'm calling you
• 2:05
  Speaker 3: from the Senseless Bureau. I just need to ask you
• 2:07
  Speaker 3: a couple questions for your country to learn. Take about
• 2:09
  Speaker 3: thirty seconds. Okay, go ahead, ma'am. Or sharks just dolphins
• 2:14
  Speaker 3: that went to the military? No?
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: Who film?
• 2:22
  Speaker 3: No, it's just summing. But anyways, listen, ma'am. Are you
• 2:25
  Speaker 3: so happy that you learned about hexagon's in school instead
• 2:28
  Speaker 3: of how to do your taxes? Because it comes in
• 2:31
  Speaker 3: so handy during hexagon season?
• 2:37
  Speaker 1: No?
• 2:38
  Speaker 3: Is anyone in your family really smart? I mean like
• 2:42
  Speaker 3: serial killer smart? No, not that I know of. And
• 2:47
  Speaker 3: what part of your smartphone is the smartest? I don't know.
• 2:53
  Speaker 3: Every Halloween do you like to contract fun sized diabetes? Who? No?
• 3:00
  Speaker 3: And this past Halloween did you go as a podcast?
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  Speaker 3: That's where you stand alone and talk for two hours
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  Speaker 3: while no one listens to you. Now, can you describe
• 3:13
  Speaker 3: the relief you feel when you take your teeth out
• 3:15
  Speaker 3: at night. I don't think, ma'am. Did you ever think
• 3:23
  Speaker 3: about this that if a giraffe sipped a cup of coffee,
• 3:27
  Speaker 3: by the time that coffee hit its stomach, it would
• 3:30
  Speaker 3: be cold. No, well, of course not. That's because you
• 3:35
  Speaker 3: only think of yourself personal. She was very confused there.
• 3:48
  Speaker 3: Do you know what the average length of a giraffe's
• 3:51
  Speaker 3: neck is? This is why my algorithm is totally messed up.
• 3:57
  Speaker 3: Oh yeah, two meters? No, I mean no, half meters. Wait,
• 4:04
  Speaker 3: hold on, I say three meters. Do you know I
• 4:07
  Speaker 3: think a giraffe would be like a fantastic watchdog in
• 4:12
  Speaker 3: your yard. The giraffe looks straight over the wall see someone.
• 4:18
  Speaker 3: I don't think they bark, obviously, what do they do?
• 4:21
  Speaker 3: They don't make I don't think they make any noise.
• 4:24
  Speaker 3: Giraffe is like a silent creature, but not the most
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  Speaker 3: the most visible creature as well. So half of five
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  Speaker 3: basically true. Yes, two point four meters. Yeah, that's a
• 4:43
  Speaker 3: that's a giraffe's neck lance a thing.
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: It's must be so tough.
• 4:51
  Speaker 3: Imagine getting getting laryngiatis. It probably takes it will probably
• 4:56
  Speaker 3: take ten years to cure that giraffees laryngitis. They call
• 5:01
  Speaker 3: it in stages. Basically, you've got a neck the size
• 5:05
  Speaker 3: of Yeah, is he too?
• 5:10
  Speaker 2: Thanks for that visual bread.
• 5:14
  Speaker 3: Have you seen them sleep or like take a snooze?
• 5:17
  Speaker 3: Don lock their legs. They kind of like curl down
• 5:21
  Speaker 3: and like their necks are they just called but they
• 5:24
  Speaker 3: don't lie down. They almost like sit like is it? Yeah?
• 5:28
  Speaker 3: I wonder how long it takes it you're off to vomit.
• 5:33
  Speaker 3: It's cured by the time it's out. You know what
• 5:35
  Speaker 3: I'm saying. There's a lot of things. Yeah, it's not easy,
• 5:39
  Speaker 3: you know. You know that. A horse? Oh wow again,
• 5:42
  Speaker 3: this is why I'm algroom because I start there and
• 5:44
  Speaker 3: then I end up. How does a horse sleep? You know,
• 5:47
  Speaker 3: horse sleep standing up? A horse? A horse doesn't sleep
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  Speaker 3: lying down. A horse locks its legs together and it
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  Speaker 3: literally dorses standing.
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  Speaker 2: That doesn't sound very comfortable.
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: I'm a horse then, because I can sleep in any
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  Speaker 1: position anywhere. Yeah, anywhere. Challenge accepted.
• 6:07
  Speaker 3: Okay, some of us are just built differently. Fun facts.
• 6:11
  Speaker 3: Fun facts. I here someone tapping, who's fact checking me? There,
• 6:14
  Speaker 3: who's googling?
• 6:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and you are correct, Yes, horses can sleep standing
• 6:19
  Speaker 2: up due to a unique anatomical feature called the stay apparatus,
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  Speaker 2: which allows them to lock their legs and their joints
• 6:30
  Speaker 2: to rest while remaining alert to danger.
• 6:33
  Speaker 3: Oppressive sold And when are you gonna learn not to
• 6:39
  Speaker 3: fact check me out because you always you are right, Derek.
• 6:44
  Speaker 2: No, but I don't mind that. See, that's the difference
• 6:47
  Speaker 2: between you and I. I love learning new.
• 6:49
  Speaker 3: Things, so it's not about you, it's about us. But
• 6:52
  Speaker 3: sometimes they can call is it's not too good? No?
• 6:58
  Speaker 1: Sometimes, you know, you get things mixed up, some that
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: you think got dodgy, that all turned out the most
• 7:07
  Speaker 1: dodgy ones turn out.
• 7:08
  Speaker 3: To be true.
• 7:09
  Speaker 2: You know, so we can confirm the horses they sleep standing, correct.
• 7:15
  Speaker 3: Okay, please throw that in a conversation today