Latest / The Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast / Finding Balance with Natasha Parker

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Finding Balance with Natasha Parker · The Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: This is the Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: with iHeartRadio.
• 0:06
  Speaker 2: Hey, guys, welcome to another Napa episode of the Almost Podcast.
• 0:10
  Speaker 2: Except I'm not in Napa because I have a baby
• 0:13
  Speaker 2: strapped to my chest and another one sleeping in the
• 0:15
  Speaker 2: next room. I'll be on the next trip. But right now,
• 0:18
  Speaker 2: Natasha Parker is with me via zoom, and she is
• 0:22
  Speaker 2: in Napa with so many Bachelor alum I'm jealous. I'm
• 0:25
  Speaker 2: having fom But Natasha, Welcome to the Almost Famous Podcast.
• 0:29
  Speaker 2: I'm sure you're doing multiple days, aren't you. Yes, yes, yes, yeah, Okay,
• 0:34
  Speaker 2: Well this one's your solo your solo interview. Hello, all right, well,
• 0:40
  Speaker 2: I just like you know, I like to just go
• 0:42
  Speaker 2: in full throttle. So you have a podcast. It's been
• 0:47
  Speaker 2: around for a bit. Now I want to say closer
• 0:49
  Speaker 2: to you're no months? No? How long is it? Four months? Man?
• 0:55
  Speaker 2: I think time flies, and now I say that doesn't
• 0:57
  Speaker 2: make sense. All right, four months? How's it going?
• 1:00
  Speaker 3: It's going great. I love it so much. It's like
• 1:03
  Speaker 3: my little baby passion project because I feel like in
• 1:08
  Speaker 3: my life I've been stuck and had to pivot so
• 1:10
  Speaker 3: many times and continuing too. And I'm like some people
• 1:14
  Speaker 3: just really get this thing called life, or at least it
• 1:16
  Speaker 3: seems like it, and I want to talk about how
• 1:20
  Speaker 3: they get to where they go and kind of dissect
• 1:23
  Speaker 3: that with them and share it with people. So it's
• 1:25
  Speaker 3: been great.
• 1:26
  Speaker 2: I love it. It's called Hidden Gems with Natasha Parker.
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: And that wasn't my dramatic question. My dramatic question was
• 1:32
  Speaker 2: you recently had Rachel Lindsay on the podcast and she
• 1:38
  Speaker 2: hasn't done that many interviews besides, you know, her own
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: podcasts since the whole divorce has been well ongoing. Now,
• 1:46
  Speaker 2: I know you won't answer the question, which is what
• 1:49
  Speaker 2: did she tell you off Mike because Brian suck, That's
• 1:52
  Speaker 2: what I said, Yes, he does. Yeah, I was just
• 1:57
  Speaker 2: going to ask you, after interviewing her and talking to
• 2:00
  Speaker 2: her off Mike, what do you have to say about
• 2:03
  Speaker 2: the drama that's going on there because there's like a
• 2:05
  Speaker 2: new headline every week.
• 2:06
  Speaker 3: I know it's I mean, I I will say that
• 2:13
  Speaker 3: she is someone who is handling this so well, but
• 2:18
  Speaker 3: it's not easy and as her friend and as people
• 2:21
  Speaker 3: who know her to see these headlines and to see
• 2:24
  Speaker 3: some of the shenanigans that Brian's up to it's like,
• 2:27
  Speaker 3: are you okay, bro, Like, like what's happening here?
• 2:31
  Speaker 2: You know?
• 2:33
  Speaker 3: So she she is freakishly okay, you know, as okay
• 2:39
  Speaker 3: as someone can be. That it's going through a divorce
• 2:41
  Speaker 3: from a man who's trying to take all of their money.
• 2:44
  Speaker 3: You know, it's like kind of crazy, right, I'm like, what,
• 2:50
  Speaker 3: I'm sure she did not think she would ever be
• 2:51
  Speaker 3: in this position. So it's tough, but you know, it's ongoing.
• 2:55
  Speaker 3: And I'm saying this as her friend, and like, you know,
• 2:58
  Speaker 3: she has been, in my opinion, very gracious to him.
• 3:03
  Speaker 3: I don't know that I would have had as much
• 3:05
  Speaker 3: for Strath, you know what I mean, like restraint if
• 3:08
  Speaker 3: I were her. But I think she's handling it really well.
• 3:11
  Speaker 3: And yes, like you said, she has her own podcast,
• 3:13
  Speaker 3: so she I'm sure I'm just gonna have like a
• 3:15
  Speaker 3: episode about it when maybe all of the divorce things
• 3:19
  Speaker 3: are done. But she doesn't want this. She don't want
• 3:23
  Speaker 3: she didn't want this. I know she didn't want it
• 3:25
  Speaker 3: to be like this. It's messy, it's real messy.
• 3:29
  Speaker 2: How's the messiness made her just be like, Oh, I'm
• 3:31
  Speaker 2: really glad that I'm out of this? Has it made
• 3:33
  Speaker 2: her have less sadness around.
• 3:36
  Speaker 3: It, I think, I mean, I think, at least from
• 3:42
  Speaker 3: the podcast, she's like, some days we're happy, some days
• 3:45
  Speaker 3: were sad. I think she's like, really it's helped her
• 3:49
  Speaker 3: be more present because it's like every day it's something new,
• 3:52
  Speaker 3: you know, like she'll be like, Okay, like we're almost
• 3:54
  Speaker 3: done with this, this is almost over, but then something
• 3:56
  Speaker 3: else will happen, you know, So it seems like it's
• 3:59
  Speaker 3: like a crazy emotional rollercoaster. So I don't know that
• 4:06
  Speaker 3: she's like, I'm good being done with this. It's more
• 4:09
  Speaker 3: so I think probably that's the case sometimes, but sometimes
• 4:14
  Speaker 3: she's probably like how did I get here? How did
• 4:17
  Speaker 3: we get here? You know, that's I think the sentiment.
• 4:22
  Speaker 2: I don't want to pepper you with more. I don't
• 4:25
  Speaker 2: want to pepper you with questions about somebody else.
• 4:28
  Speaker 3: But but we love her, and I really hope that
• 4:30
  Speaker 3: she can get her you know, I hope that she
• 4:33
  Speaker 3: can get the clarity, and and I pray for her
• 4:35
  Speaker 3: every day, you know, I really do, because I'm like, girl,
• 4:38
  Speaker 3: it's it's tough and having people dissect your life every day.
• 4:41
  Speaker 3: So I'm trying to do it in a way that
• 4:43
  Speaker 3: like hopefully helps her, what I mean, helps her feel better?
• 4:47
  Speaker 2: Yeah for sure. All right, well, yeah, we both we do,
• 4:50
  Speaker 2: both do. But I do have to have one more questions.
• 4:55
  Speaker 2: Are they still living together in the same house.
• 4:58
  Speaker 3: I don't know.
• 4:59
  Speaker 2: I take it that was like, how are you doing that?
• 5:03
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't, dude.
• 5:05
  Speaker 2: Move in with your parents or something.
• 5:08
  Speaker 3: I mean, I don't think that was up to her.
• 5:14
  Speaker 3: I don't think that was up to her. But I
• 5:16
  Speaker 3: think I don't think that they're still in the same house.
• 5:19
  Speaker 3: But I'm not sure. I'm really not sure.
• 5:21
  Speaker 2: I'm really because I know that was a big complication
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: for a while, just based on headlines, you know, I have.
• 5:25
  Speaker 3: Yeah, not well, at the time of our podcast, he
• 5:28
  Speaker 3: was still living there. That I do know that.
• 5:31
  Speaker 2: I do know that.
• 5:32
  Speaker 3: Yeah, m hm.
• 5:33
  Speaker 2: And they are just ghosts ships in the night.
• 5:37
  Speaker 3: I mean, I guess I'm like, girl, you can come
• 5:40
  Speaker 3: to New York and hang with me. I'll see her
• 5:42
  Speaker 3: in New York soon.
• 5:44
  Speaker 2: How is your love life in New York? I felt
• 5:46
  Speaker 2: like you maybe have been seeing someone.
• 5:48
  Speaker 3: Oh, I mean my love life, my love life, you know,
• 5:52
  Speaker 3: my dating life. I'll say my dating life, because a girl,
• 5:55
  Speaker 3: a girl hasn't been in love.
• 5:57
  Speaker 2: That's a better way of saying it anyway. Yeah, love life,
• 6:00
  Speaker 2: that's an antiquated term.
• 6:02
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean I haven't been, actually, I think in
• 6:05
  Speaker 3: love in a while since probably my ex boyfriend and
• 6:09
  Speaker 3: that was three years ago that we dated. But my
• 6:12
  Speaker 3: dating life is great. I am always on a date.
• 6:15
  Speaker 3: There is always someone hitting me up to date me.
• 6:19
  Speaker 3: But it that's the thing about New York, you know
• 6:22
  Speaker 3: what I mean. It's like, it's not hard to get
• 6:24
  Speaker 3: a date, but it is hard to maybe find yourself
• 6:31
  Speaker 3: wanting to go to the next level with someone. Yeah,
• 6:34
  Speaker 3: so it is, you know, like they say, like a
• 6:36
  Speaker 3: revolving door. I feel like it's my dating life.
• 6:40
  Speaker 2: You know. One of my best friends just became single
• 6:44
  Speaker 2: last weekend and she lives in New York. She's about
• 6:47
  Speaker 2: your age, mid thirties. So what is your best advice
• 6:52
  Speaker 2: for her? Because the ending of the relationship wasn't exactly like,
• 6:58
  Speaker 2: she's not really sad about this particular relationship ending, she's
• 7:02
  Speaker 2: sad that she has to go back into the dating
• 7:04
  Speaker 2: pool of New York.
• 7:05
  Speaker 3: Yes, my advice for her would be to listen to
• 7:10
  Speaker 3: my podcasts, every one about dating. There's a Femininity one
• 7:13
  Speaker 3: about dating.
• 7:16
  Speaker 2: Feminous energy versus masculine orgy.
• 7:18
  Speaker 3: Yes, yes, there's a femininity episode. I would tell her
• 7:21
  Speaker 3: to listen to that because I think that when before
• 7:26
  Speaker 3: you go out and date, you really have to feel
• 7:30
  Speaker 3: good about yourself, and then it changes the mindset of
• 7:33
  Speaker 3: going and dating because now I used to you know,
• 7:36
  Speaker 3: when you have that pick me energy, it's like, oh,
• 7:38
  Speaker 3: this person doesn't want to date me, this person or
• 7:40
  Speaker 3: whatever for whatever reason. Now I'm like, I'm so specific
• 7:44
  Speaker 3: in what I want. I feel great about dating. So
• 7:48
  Speaker 3: when I meet someone and they aren't giving me what
• 7:51
  Speaker 3: I want, and what I mean by what I want
• 7:52
  Speaker 3: is like you know, wanting someone who you know, if
• 7:55
  Speaker 3: you say you're gonna call.
• 7:57
  Speaker 2: Me, you do it?
• 7:58
  Speaker 3: Do you do what you mean? You mean what you say,
• 8:00
  Speaker 3: you know? And things like that, like a man of
• 8:03
  Speaker 3: their words, someone who regards you, thinks about you, cares
• 8:06
  Speaker 3: about you, wants to include you, and things. When I
• 8:08
  Speaker 3: meet these guys who are like, oh, like they're you know,
• 8:11
  Speaker 3: willy nilly fly by the night, it's like, you actually
• 8:13
  Speaker 3: don't want to date that, Like, let's be honest, you
• 8:15
  Speaker 3: don't want to date someone like that. Why are you
• 8:17
  Speaker 3: chasing after that?
• 8:18
  Speaker 2: You know? Right? So because why is it so tempting
• 8:20
  Speaker 2: to chase Yeah.
• 8:21
  Speaker 3: Well, not for me anymore. Not for me anymore. I
• 8:24
  Speaker 3: don't feel that way. And so that's why when I
• 8:26
  Speaker 3: meet someone and we have a great day or we
• 8:28
  Speaker 3: have a great anything, and they're not responsive, or they're
• 8:32
  Speaker 3: not texting back or they're not it's like, I will
• 8:34
  Speaker 3: say my heart, I will say my piece, I had
• 8:36
  Speaker 3: a great time. I'd love to see you again. And
• 8:38
  Speaker 3: if you don't reciprocate that onto the next because I
• 8:41
  Speaker 3: feel good about my husband's gonna call me, he's gonna
• 8:44
  Speaker 3: follow up, he's gonna say I want to take you
• 8:46
  Speaker 3: out again. He wants you know, he's gonna want to
• 8:48
  Speaker 3: do these things right. So I think that it's all
• 8:52
  Speaker 3: about your mindset. And for her, she has to shift
• 8:54
  Speaker 3: her mindset. If she thinks dating is gonna be hard,
• 8:56
  Speaker 3: it will be If she thinks it's gonna be fun
• 8:58
  Speaker 3: and it's cool to meet people. And you know, I
• 9:01
  Speaker 3: think people are fascinating. I go on, I've been on
• 9:04
  Speaker 3: some awful dates and now I have a great story
• 9:05
  Speaker 3: to tell. You know what I mean?
• 9:08
  Speaker 2: Well, welcome to my next question. What has been your
• 9:12
  Speaker 2: worst date? Oh boy, there's been a there's love horror
• 9:17
  Speaker 2: dating stories.
• 9:18
  Speaker 3: Yeah, there's been a few, you know, there was once.
• 9:25
  Speaker 3: There was one time that I mean, manners is I
• 9:28
  Speaker 3: think a really big thing. I think a lot of
• 9:29
  Speaker 3: people talk about manners, like if they're like nice to
• 9:31
  Speaker 3: waiters and stuff like that. Sure, and you know, if
• 9:34
  Speaker 3: you're on a first date, most people know how to
• 9:36
  Speaker 3: be nice to a waiter, right, But then there's just
• 9:38
  Speaker 3: normal regular manners, you know, like how I'm sitting here,
• 9:42
  Speaker 3: I'm not.
• 9:43
  Speaker 4: Like you know, like I'm not like I like, you know,
• 9:49
  Speaker 4: you're sitting up straight, You're I went on a date
• 9:52
  Speaker 4: with this guy took me to a really nice restaurant,
• 9:54
  Speaker 4: which was like, okay, that's cutie.
• 9:55
  Speaker 3: You know, and then he proceeded to like put his
• 10:00
  Speaker 3: feet up. We were in a booth. He put his
• 10:02
  Speaker 3: feet up on the table, and I'm.
• 10:04
  Speaker 2: Like, on, but I thought you were gonna stay on
• 10:06
  Speaker 2: the seat across the way, like your seat on the ball.
• 10:11
  Speaker 3: Wait, he's exhausted such a long so gross, I said,
• 10:18
  Speaker 3: do you want to reschedule? Becuz, like, what's happening here?
• 10:25
  Speaker 2: And that's horrific? Yeah, it's how did you go on?
• 10:29
  Speaker 2: And what did it get worse? Well?
• 10:30
  Speaker 3: I was like, Oh, we're gonna eat on this table?
• 10:32
  Speaker 3: Are you sure this is a place for your feet?
• 10:35
  Speaker 3: And he was like, oh, my bad, my bad, like
• 10:37
  Speaker 3: and then he like kind of straighten up. But I
• 10:39
  Speaker 3: was just like, I'm not I can't. No, It's just
• 10:41
  Speaker 3: it was giving too much and this is the first
• 10:43
  Speaker 3: time I'm meeting this person in the stardioacting like but
• 10:46
  Speaker 3: also it's just like, you know, the biggest thing I
• 10:49
  Speaker 3: feel like in New York because of that revolving door
• 10:51
  Speaker 3: and like you meet people so much. The worst thing
• 10:54
  Speaker 3: is when you like post a photo on the interweb,
• 10:59
  Speaker 3: maybe in a bikini, maybe you know, just living your
• 11:02
  Speaker 3: best life with your girlies, whatever you're doing, and someone
• 11:05
  Speaker 3: you haven't talked to in years, hits you up. This
• 11:08
  Speaker 3: just happened to me, by the way, hits you up.
• 11:11
  Speaker 3: This guy calls me seven times. He's up. He's like, Hey,
• 11:16
  Speaker 3: what's up? Like, what are you doing right now? Like,
• 11:19
  Speaker 3: drop everything, come hang out with me. Oh I go,
• 11:23
  Speaker 3: I go what. By the way, he lives in Brooklyn.
• 11:26
  Speaker 3: He lives in Brooklyn. I live in Manhattan. He's like,
• 11:29
  Speaker 3: come to Brooklyn right now. I haven't talked to you
• 11:33
  Speaker 3: in four years, and you want me to just d okay,
• 11:38
  Speaker 3: sure what I was like, like, this happens more times
• 11:43
  Speaker 3: than not where people will just randomly hit you look,
• 11:46
  Speaker 3: hit you up because I don't know, they saw something
• 11:48
  Speaker 3: on Instagram or whatever the case is, and they just
• 11:52
  Speaker 3: want to just disrup your life. And I'm like, sir, no,
• 11:55
  Speaker 3: I'm like, let's let's let's be whind this. You want
• 11:57
  Speaker 3: to hang out with me, you want to see me,
• 11:59
  Speaker 3: Let's hey, how are you, Natasha? I just saw a
• 12:02
  Speaker 3: photo may reminded me of the good times that we had.
• 12:05
  Speaker 3: I'd love to come see you when you're available.
• 12:06
  Speaker 2: Wow.
• 12:07
  Speaker 3: What a gentleman. Now I'm gonna think about it. Wow
• 12:11
  Speaker 3: was that so hard? Was that hard?
• 12:15
  Speaker 2: Wow? I can't believe. I mean, I can believe I've
• 12:18
  Speaker 2: experienced it back in the day, but it's just back
• 12:22
  Speaker 2: in the day. But that is still that is particularly
• 12:25
  Speaker 2: wild to hear. Well, you're probably not the only person
• 12:38
  Speaker 2: who meditated before rose ceremonies, but I just want to
• 12:41
  Speaker 2: talk about how that's something that like you did to
• 12:43
  Speaker 2: calm your nurse. Was I to this day, I feel
• 12:47
  Speaker 2: like rose ceremonies were the most nerve wracking moment of
• 12:50
  Speaker 2: my entire life. Like I've given you know, I've given birth,
• 12:55
  Speaker 2: and I was even that nervous when I had like
• 12:58
  Speaker 2: a first contraction. And there's something about rose ceremonies because
• 13:04
  Speaker 2: it's just like I guess it's just the you're just
• 13:08
  Speaker 2: opening up yourself to absolute public rejection. Rejection, Yeah, thank you, Yes,
• 13:14
  Speaker 2: So how did you calm yourself and how do you
• 13:17
  Speaker 2: apply that skill to like everyday life too?
• 13:22
  Speaker 3: Well? Meditation Literally, I always say it saved my life
• 13:27
  Speaker 3: because I think that everything is mindset, like how we
• 13:31
  Speaker 3: think about anything as mindset. So it was really important
• 13:36
  Speaker 3: for me to balance my energy out during the both
• 13:39
  Speaker 3: shows actually, but definitely Bachelor because I felt I didn't
• 13:44
  Speaker 3: know what to expect at all, so I needed to
• 13:47
  Speaker 3: meditate every day. Also, there's so much going on, there's
• 13:50
  Speaker 3: so many energies, there's so many people to talk to,
• 13:52
  Speaker 3: there's so many conversations. It's just like sensory overload for yourself.
• 13:56
  Speaker 3: So I'm like, before these rose ceremonies, I would like
• 13:59
  Speaker 3: to actually meet in the morning, but normally we would
• 14:01
  Speaker 3: wake up and there's like you know, hair makeup, you know,
• 14:03
  Speaker 3: we got to like do something, something's happening.
• 14:05
  Speaker 2: So they want you fully glammed up twelve hours before
• 14:09
  Speaker 2: the cocktail.
• 14:09
  Speaker 3: Yeah, exactly, exactly, and.
• 14:12
  Speaker 2: That would annoy me to no end. Yeah, I would
• 14:15
  Speaker 2: know because I'm like, you guys aren't even gonna interview
• 14:17
  Speaker 2: me for five hours. I know you too, I know
• 14:19
  Speaker 2: all of you. Yeah, I've known this for years now.
• 14:22
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it's like and wait, hurry up and wait. Yeah,
• 14:25
  Speaker 3: no totally. But so I would do it before because
• 14:29
  Speaker 3: I'm like, Okay, I need to be able to like
• 14:32
  Speaker 3: hone in myself, right. But I tried not to do
• 14:37
  Speaker 3: them right before the rose ceremony. But the one time
• 14:40
  Speaker 3: that I did, and I think I just told the
• 14:41
  Speaker 3: story on my podcast how I did it right before
• 14:46
  Speaker 3: the rose ceremony and like sometimes you can when I meditate,
• 14:51
  Speaker 3: I'm still like in a meditative state, like right after,
• 14:54
  Speaker 3: like I'm here, but I'm still just very like like
• 14:57
  Speaker 3: Xen and Peter called my name and I didn't move,
• 15:02
  Speaker 3: and like Sidney just like Josh, I'm like oh oh,
• 15:07
  Speaker 3: and he was like do you want this rose?
• 15:09
  Speaker 2: Do you not?
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: Like?
• 15:11
  Speaker 3: What's? And I was like, oh my god, I'm so sorry.
• 15:13
  Speaker 3: Like I was just completely spaced out, like I didn't
• 15:15
  Speaker 3: even hear my name and what's funny is it's you know,
• 15:19
  Speaker 3: I don't know if this happened on your season or not,
• 15:20
  Speaker 3: but like he always seemed like it seemed like, for
• 15:24
  Speaker 3: like four rose ceremonies he called my name fourth. So
• 15:29
  Speaker 3: when he didn't this time, like he didn't call my
• 15:32
  Speaker 3: name fourth, he called it well, like he called it
• 15:34
  Speaker 3: like third. And but also he had already given out
• 15:39
  Speaker 3: so many roses for like dates and stuff, so I
• 15:42
  Speaker 3: thought that I was just maybe waiting like it was
• 15:44
  Speaker 3: someone else's name or something like that, because it was like, oh,
• 15:46
  Speaker 3: he's called my name four, like like the last three ceremonies,
• 15:49
  Speaker 3: so it's going before again. And I was just like
• 15:51
  Speaker 3: sitting there and standing there. So yeah, so I definitely
• 15:55
  Speaker 3: zoned out. And I definitely think that if you are
• 15:57
  Speaker 3: going to meditate for your nerves, you need to do
• 15:58
  Speaker 3: it before you do something like like well before you
• 16:01
  Speaker 3: have to do something or be present for something, you know.
• 16:04
  Speaker 3: But I think the most important thing about meditation is
• 16:07
  Speaker 3: just like that balance, right because you wake up from
• 16:11
  Speaker 3: being sleep and you're the most balanced when that moment,
• 16:14
  Speaker 3: like right when you wake up from like when you're
• 16:16
  Speaker 3: switching from subconscious to consciousness, you're the most balance in
• 16:19
  Speaker 3: that moment, and then you pick up your phone, you
• 16:21
  Speaker 3: go on Instagram and answer and email, you go to TikTok,
• 16:25
  Speaker 3: and it's just like info info, info info. So the
• 16:28
  Speaker 3: meditation is kind of like that balance that you get right,
• 16:32
  Speaker 3: and then that way I think it gives, at least
• 16:36
  Speaker 3: for me, it helps me give information to other people
• 16:41
  Speaker 3: in the most balanced way that I can, instead of
• 16:44
  Speaker 3: like coming from a place of like anxiousness, or coming
• 16:47
  Speaker 3: from a place of like eagerness or ego or you know,
• 16:50
  Speaker 3: things like that. So that's why I need my meditation.
• 16:55
  Speaker 2: How the heck do you get into a menisinis savor?
• 16:57
  Speaker 2: I just don't understand. I can't.
• 16:58
  Speaker 3: I don't have you ever meditated?
• 17:00
  Speaker 2: I sort have tried. I have certainly tried a number
• 17:02
  Speaker 2: of times.
• 17:03
  Speaker 1: M M.
• 17:03
  Speaker 2: But I can't turn off the brain.
• 17:07
  Speaker 3: So it's not turning off the brain. And that is
• 17:10
  Speaker 3: a big misconception about meditation. It's not about turning off
• 17:14
  Speaker 3: the brain. It's more so about guiding the brain to
• 17:19
  Speaker 3: certain things. So like we meditate, and that's why, like
• 17:24
  Speaker 3: they say, count your breath, right, because when you're counting
• 17:26
  Speaker 3: your breath, you're presently counting your breath. You are telling yourself,
• 17:30
  Speaker 3: I am counting my breath. So you have to tell yourself,
• 17:34
  Speaker 3: like if you think about your brain and then your
• 17:38
  Speaker 3: consciousness and then you're subconscious, right, we unconsciously when you
• 17:43
  Speaker 3: wake up in the morning, you take a shower, right,
• 17:45
  Speaker 3: you wash the same side of yourself just like without
• 17:49
  Speaker 3: even thinking. You don't like switch it up.
• 17:51
  Speaker 2: Right, Like this is just I'm now gonna wash my
• 17:54
  Speaker 2: left arm.
• 17:54
  Speaker 3: Yeah, try, but it's like it throws you off. You're like, wait,
• 17:58
  Speaker 3: something is off because our brains are so smart that
• 18:02
  Speaker 3: it puts everything in patterns for us, but even to
• 18:05
  Speaker 3: the point of our depression, our sadness. So like there's
• 18:08
  Speaker 3: a reason why when someone says something mean to you
• 18:11
  Speaker 3: you feel a certain type way. That's a pattern. It's
• 18:13
  Speaker 3: not necessarily like, uh, that person's making you feel that way.
• 18:19
  Speaker 3: The pattern is making you feel that way. Someone could
• 18:21
  Speaker 3: say you suck, and then you can be like, oh
• 18:24
  Speaker 3: I suck, or you can be like no, I don't, no,
• 18:26
  Speaker 3: I don't, right, and like you're telling yourself to reject
• 18:30
  Speaker 3: that thought. And so that's what meditation does. It basically
• 18:33
  Speaker 3: helps you say to you like your subconscious is coming
• 18:37
  Speaker 3: in and saying, hey, you don't have to feel sad
• 18:40
  Speaker 3: right now. You don't have to do this, you don't
• 18:41
  Speaker 3: have to do that. But it's like that mental workout
• 18:46
  Speaker 3: that we're doing. And it's okay that you feel like
• 18:48
  Speaker 3: you can't get into a meditative state now, because it's
• 18:50
  Speaker 3: like if I was like, hey, Ashulely, go lift five
• 18:52
  Speaker 3: hundred pounds, you're gonna be like, I can't do that.
• 18:54
  Speaker 3: But if you worked out every single day, you would
• 18:57
  Speaker 3: lift more and more and more. And that's the same
• 18:59
  Speaker 3: thing with meditation, right. So it's just starting off counting
• 19:04
  Speaker 3: your breaths, being present, and we can't turn our brains off.
• 19:07
  Speaker 3: And also when you get that thought of like oh
• 19:09
  Speaker 3: I didn't do laundry, Oh I have to do this,
• 19:11
  Speaker 3: you say hi to that thought and you say bye
• 19:13
  Speaker 3: to that thought. It's okay. It's okay to think about
• 19:16
  Speaker 3: other things while you're trying to like count your breath
• 19:19
  Speaker 3: or be present and things like that, right, because.
• 19:21
  Speaker 2: So you didn't fail the meditative state if you you're
• 19:23
  Speaker 2: thinking about.
• 19:23
  Speaker 3: Me, no no, no, no no no. And the only
• 19:26
  Speaker 3: thing about getting in a meditator to say that is
• 19:27
  Speaker 3: just like complete total relaxation. It's when your brain waves
• 19:30
  Speaker 3: go into theta, Like there's all these different brain waves
• 19:33
  Speaker 3: that we go through, and then we do it in
• 19:35
  Speaker 3: sleep automatically, right when you fall asleep. It's like you
• 19:38
  Speaker 3: fall asleep, then you get into your deep sleep, then
• 19:40
  Speaker 3: you get into your rem and all these different things
• 19:42
  Speaker 3: naturally when you go to sleep. But all of that
• 19:45
  Speaker 3: takes time, right, So it's the same thing with meditation.
• 19:49
  Speaker 3: It's literally the same thing. And it's just that muscle.
• 19:51
  Speaker 3: It's a mental muscle that you're working out every day.
• 19:53
  Speaker 3: So if you just sat there, even if it was
• 19:55
  Speaker 3: for five minutes, even during the shower. I have like
• 19:57
  Speaker 3: shower meditations that I tell people that they should do
• 20:00
  Speaker 3: because it's like it's all about consciously being present. So
• 20:04
  Speaker 3: if you just like sit in the shower and you're like,
• 20:06
  Speaker 3: this is the only time I have for myself because
• 20:07
  Speaker 3: I have to kids, and you know, I have all
• 20:09
  Speaker 3: this stuff going on, It's like imagine the water being
• 20:13
  Speaker 3: your issues, your problems in there. It's like hitting your
• 20:15
  Speaker 3: body and washing away down that drain, you know, and
• 20:18
  Speaker 3: like taking your breath with that as well. Like those
• 20:21
  Speaker 3: are like mindful meditations that you can do. There's like
• 20:23
  Speaker 3: brushing your teeth, there's even eating mindful eating like no phones,
• 20:28
  Speaker 3: no talking, and like really being present with your food.
• 20:31
  Speaker 3: Like there's so many different things that you can do
• 20:33
  Speaker 3: that help promote calmness, you know. So yeah, it's it's
• 20:39
  Speaker 3: it's a it's a it's a crazy, crazy world in
• 20:42
  Speaker 3: the sense of like what we are capable of in
• 20:46
  Speaker 3: our mind, we are capable of being like this is
• 20:48
  Speaker 3: the best day in the world, or this is the
• 20:50
  Speaker 3: worst day in the world, and the same exact thing happens. Right,
• 20:55
  Speaker 3: So did.
• 20:55
  Speaker 2: You do this, did you get did you meditate when
• 20:58
  Speaker 2: you got hurt at Nick's wedding? Can you tell this story?
• 21:01
  Speaker 2: Oh boy, oh boy, because you probably had to get
• 21:04
  Speaker 2: in a in a mindset I'm gonna be yourself calm
• 21:08
  Speaker 2: when you thought you might go blind.
• 21:09
  Speaker 3: I'm going to be honest though, I think that my
• 21:11
  Speaker 3: meditation is what helps me stay calm in situations like that,
• 21:14
  Speaker 3: because yeah, you know, maybe three four years ago, I
• 21:18
  Speaker 3: would have freaked the fuck out, Like I would have
• 21:20
  Speaker 3: really freaked out, and everyone's like, Natasha, this is weird,
• 21:23
  Speaker 3: like you can't see but like you're fine, but like
• 21:25
  Speaker 3: you're not okay, but what Yeah, I would have probably
• 21:28
  Speaker 3: freaked out, And so it is a little scary when
• 21:30
  Speaker 3: bad things happened to me and I'm not like freaking out.
• 21:33
  Speaker 3: People around me are like, are you okay, and I'm like,
• 21:35
  Speaker 3: I'm actually okay, I'm not dead, I'm okay.
• 21:40
  Speaker 2: We're very much like that. So yeah, So what happened
• 21:42
  Speaker 2: was we're at next wedding. You're on the dance floor,
• 21:46
  Speaker 2: and then all of a sudden, one of the confetti blowers, Yes,
• 21:49
  Speaker 2: was way too close to your face. Yes, so there
• 21:51
  Speaker 2: were no CONTI your eye.
• 21:53
  Speaker 3: Yes, there were no rules or instructions on how to
• 21:58
  Speaker 3: do this, and someone pulled the string and she was
• 22:04
  Speaker 3: that close to me and it popped in my eye
• 22:09
  Speaker 3: literally like it's right on impact, and it popped right
• 22:12
  Speaker 3: into my eyeball and it hurt so bad, and I
• 22:15
  Speaker 3: was fine at first. My eye was watery and I
• 22:18
  Speaker 3: was fine at first, and then it just fully went
• 22:21
  Speaker 3: black and then I like fell. I didn't faint, but
• 22:23
  Speaker 3: like I fell because I couldn't see. And it was
• 22:27
  Speaker 3: just a little dramatic. It was a little drama, you know,
• 22:29
  Speaker 3: but what's what's not drama at a at a bachelor wedding.
• 22:34
  Speaker 3: It was a lot of drama at that wedding. Right
• 22:37
  Speaker 3: of course, yeah, And so then I ended up going
• 22:40
  Speaker 3: to the bathroom and was so nicely assisted and we
• 22:47
  Speaker 3: I just kept having to like move my eye until
• 22:50
  Speaker 3: it like refocused. It wouldn't like focus, and then it
• 22:53
  Speaker 3: finally refocused, and then I talked to this I dude
• 22:55
  Speaker 3: when I got home, and he was like, yeah, like
• 22:58
  Speaker 3: it's fine, like you know, we don't see any bad
• 23:01
  Speaker 3: trauma to it. It took like two weeks for me
• 23:03
  Speaker 3: to go and it stopped hurting.
• 23:06
  Speaker 2: But did it hurt for two weeks?
• 23:08
  Speaker 3: No, it hurt for maybe five days. It was I
• 23:12
  Speaker 3: was super sensitive to light and it kept getting watery,
• 23:17
  Speaker 3: just like randomly getting watery, which was also very annoying.
• 23:20
  Speaker 3: So yeah, it was.
• 23:21
  Speaker 2: It was.
• 23:21
  Speaker 3: It was hard. It was it would it hurt, definitely hurt,
• 23:25
  Speaker 3: and we were having so much fun we were having that.
• 23:28
  Speaker 2: I'm so glad that you're okay. Yeah you're scared.
• 23:31
  Speaker 3: Yeah, No, that was really it was really wild. That
• 23:34
  Speaker 3: was crazy.
• 23:35
  Speaker 2: All right, Well, Natasha, thank you so much for joining me.
• 23:39
  Speaker 2: Wish I was there with you. I know, I'll see
• 23:41
  Speaker 2: you next time.
• 23:42
  Speaker 3: I know, I'll see you next time. Kisses to the babes,
• 23:45
  Speaker 3: Bye bye.
• 23:47
  Speaker 1: Followed the Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous podcasts on
• 23:50
  Speaker 1: iHeartRadio or subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts.