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Helium Balloons and the Art of Rejection · Ryan's Journal

• 0:15
  So I was looking through this directory the other day, right?
• 0:17
  Just a full on, old school phone book, Yellow Pages, white pages,
• 0:21
  the whole damn artifact.
• 0:23
  Wait, those still exist?
• 0:24
  I thought those were just used as doorstops in rural hardware stores.
• 0:29
  They exist if you look hard enough!
• 0:30
  But look, it got me thinking about Ryan.
• 0:33
  Ryan has this whole philosophy now, okay?
• 0:36
  He made a podcast.
• 0:37
  He knows he did a good job.
• 0:39
  He literally said, I got a spectacular, well thought, structured podcast full of
• 0:44
  great ideas.
• 0:45
  I love that confidence!
• 0:46
  Honestly, good for him.
• 0:47
  Own it!
• 0:48
  Yeah, but here is where it goes wild.
• 0:50
  He realizes he is stuck in what he calls the safe loop.
• 0:53
  He is showing his work to his therapist, his case manager, maybe a little bit to his
• 0:58
  brother here and there.
• 0:59
  And he goes, fuck that.
• 1:00
  That is not enough people.
• 1:02
  That is a clinical feedback box.
• 1:04
  It really is, though.
• 1:05
  Because when you only show your art or your story to your therapist or your family,
• 1:11
  they are paid or emotionally obligated to hold your hand.
• 1:15
  It is safe.
• 1:16
  It is controlled.
• 1:18
  So Ryan's solution?
• 1:19
  The helium balloon strategy.
• 1:21
  Literally.
• 1:22
  He says buy a package of helium balloons, stuff your audio tapes inside,
• 1:26
  or get out the Yellow Pages, pick random entries, and mail your work out to total
• 1:30
  fucking strangers.
• 1:31
  Mail it to Chevron!
• 1:32
  That was my favorite part!
• 1:34
  Yes!
• 1:35
  He imagines sending his podcast to a random manager at Chevron,
• 1:38
  or a guy out in the fields doing bean riding, farm work, or just dumping it on
• 1:42
  someone at a basketball arena auditorium.
• 1:44
  Imagine being that Chevron manager, though.
• 1:47
  You open your mail expecting fuel delivery logistics, and it is a CD of a guy
• 1:53
  talking about his soul.
• 1:54
  You scream, hey Ryan, this ain't an energy assistance business,
• 1:59
  this is a gas station!
• 2:00
  Right!
• 2:01
  But Ryan's point is, so fucking what if they say that?
• 2:05
  You are afraid of their laughter, but why?
• 2:07
  Why give a gas station manager that kind of power over your life?
• 2:11
  It is terror, pure and simple.
• 2:13
  Random selection means you lose all control over who judges you.
• 2:18
  When you curate, you choose people who will be gentle.
• 2:22
  When you toss it over the fence to random strangers, you are staring raw rejection
• 2:27
  right in the face.
• 2:29
  And that fear of random rejection is what keeps everybody's best work locked up in a
• 2:33
  journal under their bed.
• 2:35
  Ryan broke this down with a driving metaphor that honestly blew my mind.
• 2:40
  He talks about being out on the interstate.
• 2:42
  Oh, the high speed traffic comparison.
• 2:44
  Tell me about that.
• 2:45
  Okay, so you are driving down the interstate going 70 miles per hour,
• 2:49
  right?
• 2:50
  You do not get to fucking choose what cars you pass.
• 2:54
  You do not get to say, okay, I only want to drive next to quiet mufflers today,
• 2:59
  keep the loud mufflers away from me.
• 3:01
  You just drive!
• 3:02
  You pass the loud muffler, you pass the rust bucket, you pass the semi truck.
• 3:06
  You do not get a say in traffic.
• 3:08
  Exactly.
• 3:10
  And Ryan says life and creative work are the exact same way.
• 3:14
  This myth of the perfectly curated audience is bullshit.
• 3:19
  Creators paralyze themselves trying to find the precise, warm,
• 3:24
  accepting listener before they ever put a word out there.
• 3:27
  That perfectionism is a total trap.
• 3:31
  You sit there refining your little target demographic, and meanwhile,
• 3:35
  you never actually release anything because you are terrified someone outside your
• 3:40
  bubble might hear it.
• 3:41
  He even quoted Foreigner!
• 3:43
  He brings up Double Vision!
• 3:45
  Double vision gets the best of me!
• 3:47
  And he says, you cannot let rejection get the best of you.
• 3:51
  You cannot let double rejection or triple rejection stop you from putting yourself
• 3:55
  out there.
• 3:56
  So Chuckles, what do you think?
• 3:57
  Is picking a name out of the Yellow Pages and sending your deepest thoughts to a
• 4:01
  stranger bravado, or is it pure emotional liberation?
• 4:06
  It is fucking chaotic neutral, man!
• 4:08
  But it is liberating.
• 4:09
  Because once you accept that the highway has loud mufflers and people who will laugh
• 4:13
  at you, the fear loses its teeth.
• 4:16
  When you treat public sharing like uncurated traffic, you stop taking the noise
• 4:20
  personally.
• 4:22
  Where does Ryan get this level of unshakeable confidence, though?
• 4:25
  It is not just empty ego.
• 4:28
  It comes from something deep and terrifying.
• 4:31
  Right, we have to talk about his history.
• 4:34
  He survived a horrific woodshop lathe accident, and then a brutal car crash.
• 4:39
  He has lived with a lazy eye for 48 years that he did not choose.
• 4:44
  When you have literally walked away from catastrophic trauma,
• 4:48
  when you know you are lucky to be alive, your whole scale of fear shifts.
• 4:53
  Ryan said it plainly: I am a miracle, so why should I be ashamed to speak?
• 4:58
  Fuck yes.
• 4:59
  That is the ultimate shift.
• 5:01
  Moving from victim to miracle.
• 5:03
  Once you realize your existence is a statistical anomaly, worrying whether some
• 5:08
  middle manager at Chevron likes your podcast feels completely fucking ridiculous.
• 5:13
  Society usually demands the opposite from trauma survivors,
• 5:16
  doesn't it?
• 5:17
  Society expects you to be quiet, humble, modest, to sit in your safe little support
• 5:23
  group and keep your testimony contained.
• 5:25
  They want you manageable.
• 5:27
  They want your recovery neat and clean.
• 5:29
  But claiming I am a miracle and I deserve to broadcast my voice to the entire public
• 5:34
  breaks that institutional conditioning completely.
• 5:37
  Victoria, you have faced major moments where everything felt on the line.
• 5:42
  Does that resonate with you?
• 5:44
  100 percent.
• 5:46
  When you cross a threshold of survival, whether it is illness,
• 5:50
  an accident, or losing everything you built, public judgment stops having power over
• 5:55
  you.
• 5:56
  You realize life is too short to play small just to keep quiet people comfortable.
• 6:01
  Okay, my absolute favorite idea from Ryan's whole manifest is what I am calling
• 6:06
  Reverse Jury Duty.
• 6:08
  Explain Reverse Jury Duty.
• 6:10
  Think about how real jury duty works.
• 6:12
  The government pulls your name out of a hat, sends you a letter,
• 6:15
  and says, fuck you, you are on the list, come sit in a courtroom for three days
• 6:19
  whether you like it or not.
• 6:20
  Right, zero consent, pure institutional obligation.
• 6:23
  So Ryan says, flip the script!
• 6:25
  Fight back!
• 6:26
  Draft random strangers into listening to your story.
• 6:29
  Put Jesse Ventura on the list.
• 6:31
  Send a tape to Donald Trump.
• 6:33
  Send a package to members of Congress!
• 6:36
  You tell them, congratulations, you were nominated to hear my story today,
• 6:41
  whether good or bad, you put up with it!
• 6:44
  Exactly!
• 6:44
  Because that is what media algorithms do to us every single second of the day!
• 6:49
  Feeds push unwanted bullshit into our brains constantly without asking.
• 6:54
  Launching helium balloon broadcasts is just taking the algorithm and weaponizing it
• 6:58
  right back.
• 6:59
  Is it hilarious madness?
• 7:01
  Yes.
• 7:01
  But it is also a brilliant act of defiance against a world that constantly forces
• 7:06
  content onto you while telling you to keep your own mouth shut.
• 7:09
  It forces engagement.
• 7:10
  It insists that your voice matters just as much as whatever promoted ad or political
• 7:17
  debate is filling the airwaves.
• 7:19
  So how do you actually execute this in real life?
• 7:23
  What does it mean to get out the plow and plow through the fear?
• 7:28
  It means using that heavy machinery mindset.
• 7:30
  You drive the tractor right over your fear of rejection.
• 7:34
  Rejection has power, sure, but your momentum has to be stronger.
• 7:38
  It comes back to the balloon metaphor.
• 7:40
  You blow up the helium balloon, you tie your work to it, and you let that fucker
• 7:44
  land wherever it lands.
• 7:46
  North, south, east, west, on a mansion roof or in a ditch.
• 7:50
  The victory is not landing a million followers or getting a huge record deal.
• 7:55
  The ultimate victory is releasing all control over the outcome and shattering the
• 8:00
  fear of being laughed at.
• 8:02
  If a good coach tells you that you are worth more than gold,
• 8:05
  then keeping your story locked in a drawer is a crime against yourself.
• 8:09
  So we have to leave everyone listening with a real question today.
• 8:13
  What private piece of work, what story, what creative idea are you hiding away right
• 8:19
  now because you are scared of what people will say?
• 8:22
  What happens if you stop caring about the safe feedback loop,
• 8:27
  pull out the plow, inflate the balloon, and just let it fly today?
• 8:31
  Let it land at Chevron.
• 8:33
  Fuck it.