Latest / Cash Confident with Brie Sodano / 4 Financial Skills You Want to Have
Transcript
- 0:01Speaker 1: Welcome to the Cash Confident podcast.
- 0:03Speaker 1: I'm Brie Sedano, your fearless host, personal finance expert and the visionary behind the revolutionary Cash Confident community.
- 0:10Speaker 1: Get ready to embark on an electrifying journey where we redefine the rules of money and empower women to harness the immense power to craft a life they truly, truly desire.
- 0:22Speaker 1: This podcast is the ultimate resource, meticulously crafted, for women who are ready to unleash their financial prowess and embrace a life of abundant success.
- 0:32Speaker 1: We leave no stone unturned as we delve into the depths of money management, mindset mastery and the undeniable influence of emotions on your financial decisions.
- 0:43Speaker 1: Prepare to rise above the societal limitations and break free from the chains that have held you back, as we equip you with the tools and knowledge to make bold, confident choices with your cash.
- 0:55Speaker 1: We believe that true financial power begins with knowledge, and that is exactly what we deliver.
- 1:02Speaker 1: So buckle up, my fierce and ambitious friends, as we embark on this transformative journey to becoming Cash Confident together.
- 1:10Speaker 1: Oh, hello, hello everyone, brie Sedano coming to you today on the Cash Confident podcast, and today we are talking about four financial skills that you definitely want to have, and I'm going to break this down.
- 1:30Speaker 1: And these are really high level skills.
- 1:32Speaker 1: These are not like nitty gritty skills, but these are kind of the big picture ways that we use money, and so the first two financial skills that we're going to talk about are both included in the energy of exchange.
- 1:46Speaker 1: So in exchange, as a trade, it is a giving and receiving at the exact same time, and so giving and receiving are the two skills that we're going to talk about, and we're going to start with receiving, because that is the place where most people have the actual problems.
- 2:05Speaker 1: Most of us can give our work, we can give our money in exchange for something, but the receiving tends to be a little bit harder, and so receiving is a last, and last week's episode too, we talked about some of the masculine and feminine qualities that happen within our money, and so today we'll be just carrying on with that conversation.
- 2:25Speaker 1: So I'm going to just give you some of these things, and I'm going to frame them in terms of masculine and feminine, and I do mean that within our own selves.
- 2:35Speaker 1: I don't mean in relationship, and I certainly don't mean a man or a woman.
- 2:40Speaker 1: I'm talking about, like, our own internal feminine energy, our own internal masculine energy, and the balance between the two within ourselves.
- 2:50Speaker 1: So the receiving is a feminine quality.
- 2:57Speaker 1: And this is the place where we set our prices.
- 3:02Speaker 1: If we're working, this is the price where it's like I see what I'm delivering and this is what I expect in return.
- 3:11Speaker 1: And this is the place where sometimes I don't know we feel like we don't deserve it, or we feel like it's unrealistic, or we feel like this is a place where sometimes we let other people's financial situation dictate our prices and this works.
- 3:26Speaker 1: And listen, this happens in the W2 world too.
- 3:29Speaker 1: Like I'm not just talking about businesses here, I've had many, many clients work for nonprofits and say, oh well, they can't afford to pay me more, and that's like we're putting other people's money junk on us and our ceilings.
- 3:45Speaker 1: And so our capacity to receive really is the start point for our capacity to give.
- 3:52Speaker 1: You can't spend money that you don't have.
- 3:56Speaker 1: I mean, you can on credit, I guess, but if you don't have it to spend, you don't have it to spend, and so if you receive less, you can circulate less, and that's just the way that that goes.
- 4:05Speaker 1: So receiving money does take I guess we'll call it some practice.
- 4:10Speaker 1: It does, and some of these practices may be learning to see the value of the work that you do.
- 4:14Speaker 1: Some of these practices may just be holding a moment of silence.
- 4:20Speaker 1: When you say your price is learning to negotiate, like learning to ask for the things that you want, these are on the receiving end.
- 4:26Speaker 1: Then we have the more massive side, the giving side, and so this would be the side where, if you're working, this is the side where you're showing up and you're doing a job, you're giving your time, your attention, your talents, your skills toward the effort of essentially somebody else.
- 4:43Speaker 1: I give all of those things to my clients, and if I worked at McDonald's, I would be giving my time, attention and efforts in the exact same way.
- 4:53Speaker 1: When we are both giving fully and receiving fully, we're going to be in a state of expansion.
- 5:01Speaker 1: So if I am fully seeing all of the value that I bring to the table and I'm showing up in my work whatever work that is full out, like all in doing my best, serving at the highest level that I can serve, and then I'm receiving the fullness, I'm receiving the price, the fullness that's going to put me on a trajectory of an upward spiral, because I'm going to be giving fully, I'm going to be receiving fully.
- 5:34Speaker 1: That's going to give me time, space, energy to potentially hire the help that I need in the house or in the business.
- 5:42Speaker 1: It just moves me in an upward spiral.
- 5:45Speaker 1: If those things are imbalanced, that spiral gets real wonky.
- 5:50Speaker 1: So let's say I'm really giving a lot but I'm not letting myself fully receive.
- 5:55Speaker 1: What ends up happening?
- 5:56Speaker 1: Over time I get more and more depleted.
- 5:58Speaker 1: This is where people get like a little busy, broken, exhausted, right, like so some of my prior episodes.
- 6:02Speaker 1: We talk about that cycle of busy, broken, exhausted.
- 6:05Speaker 1: So if I'm not willing to let myself receive fully and I still give fully, I will get.
- 6:11Speaker 1: I will take out of my own energy stores for a period of time until I cannot do that.
- 6:17Speaker 1: And that's generally when people get sick, you know like there's a whole, you know adrenal fatigue, right, burnout, like these places where we're so taxed, we're so exhausted from giving that, that then our capacity to give diminishes, right.
- 6:33Speaker 1: So we can see that if we're out of balance we can take from ourselves for a minute and then once, once those energy stores are gone, then our capacity to give also gets smaller.
- 6:45Speaker 1: And is our capacity to give get smaller, then our capacity to receive will get smaller in like in response to that.
- 6:51Speaker 1: And if we're receiving out of balance with our giving.
- 6:57Speaker 1: You know we're probably not going to have our customers come back or we're probably not.
- 7:00Speaker 1: You know, like, if we're, if we're taking a salary that's much bigger than the value that we're giving, like that drop's not going to last long.
- 7:06Speaker 1: If we're, you know, receiving payments from our clients and then not giving to the fullness of what they'd expected, you know, or what we were capable of, again we're probably not going to.
- 7:18Speaker 1: You know, that will also be a place of diminishing, diminishing returns, like it might work out for a minute but then it's not going to work.
- 7:27Speaker 1: So that exchange has to feel good.
- 7:29Speaker 1: And I generally look for an exchange where both people feel like they got the better side of the deal, right.
- 7:35Speaker 1: Like that's how you know you have a great exchange.
- 7:37Speaker 1: And so like, look, if I go to the store and I'm taking my dollars and I'm trading them for oranges, right, because I was hungry and I wanted an orange, the orange, I would have rather have the orange than the money, that's what I'm saying Like I'm, I'm trading that you know, paper currency or my coins in for some snacks, little oranges, and then I feel like I got the better side of the deal, but the store already had a bazillion oranges and they were there just to, you know, sell food.
- 8:06Speaker 1: So they feel like they got the better end of the deal and it not works out.
- 8:10Speaker 1: So, giving and receiving this this concept happens while you're working and it also happens while you're at the store, right?
- 8:16Speaker 1: So, like, when you're at the store, you're picking out your goods, you are going to be giving your money to receive, you know, the goods or services that you provide, right, or that somebody else provides.
- 8:27Speaker 1: So that's, that's the energy of exchange, and these are the things that, like, is my, is my energy of giving and receiving.
- 8:38Speaker 1: Is that balanced?
- 8:40Speaker 1: Is that growing?
- 8:41Speaker 1: Is that shrinking?
- 8:42Speaker 1: Those are questions you want to be thinking about for yourself, especially if you're wanting a bigger and bigger life, right, like, and you don't always need to be having a bigger and bigger life.
- 8:52Speaker 1: Sometimes it's.
- 8:53Speaker 1: Sometimes that's not, that's not what our life is calling for.
- 8:56Speaker 1: Sometimes that's not, that's not the thing, and that's cool, that's cool.
- 9:04Speaker 1: But we do want to do that with intentionality, right, there's like a level of intention that we want to be doing that.
- 9:10Speaker 1: So, when our giving and receiving are balanced and going well, we should be in an upward spiral.
- 9:21Speaker 1: When they get imbalanced, when we're either over giving or over receiving, or under receiving or under giving.
- 9:27Speaker 1: I guess they're kind of the same.
- 9:29Speaker 1: When you think about it hard enough, those are the places where we're going to see less results in time.
- 9:35Speaker 1: We may see a short term boost, but we're going to see less results in time.
- 9:40Speaker 1: So those are two of the energies that I want to talk about.
- 9:45Speaker 1: So your capacity to give and your capacity to receive.
- 9:48Speaker 1: Now I will just share this little story with you.
- 9:50Speaker 1: The other day, because I was in a meditation, I was thinking about it and I was really pondering on my capacity to give and I found some old stories where what I had given wasn't received.
- 10:06Speaker 1: Well, because sometimes I would tell you, like gifts are, gifts are not my love language and honestly, sometimes they like give me a little anxiety, like when I'm trying to really show somebody I love them with, like with a material item, like with a gift, that there are people in this world who would nail it with gifts and I can be one of them, but I am not always one of them.
- 10:29Speaker 1: Sometimes I just can't figure it.
- 10:30Speaker 1: I'm like I don't know, man.
- 10:32Speaker 1: So that is.
- 10:35Speaker 1: That is the truth about Brace Sedano, right when I was.
- 10:40Speaker 1: So listen, I'll tell you a quick little story.
- 10:42Speaker 1: So a friend of mine got a Reiki like a certificate wild back and I knew she didn't have a table.
- 10:49Speaker 1: And so one of my friends was selling a beautiful table that could be used for Reiki, like from her garage, and I knew it would be clean and perfect and so I bought it for her.
- 11:00Speaker 1: I bought it for my first friend and I remember having such anxiety about giving her this gift, like to the level that doesn't even make sense, and I was worried that she was going to be thinking that I was like pushing my agenda on her for some reason, like this was like kind of what was in my mind and I ended up giving.
- 11:18Speaker 1: I mean, I bought the table, I gave her the table and she loved it and she appreciated it and she uses it all the time, but I remember like not wanting to give it to her for fear that it wouldn't be well received.
- 11:29Speaker 1: Really, like that's the truth.
- 11:31Speaker 1: And so the other day, when I was in my meditation, I was kind of thinking about it and I was like, oh, I remember, you know, sometimes when I was a kid and you know, my gifts or my efforts like weren't super well received.
- 11:44Speaker 1: Like, and when I was a kid I must have been terrible at gift giving.
- 11:48Speaker 1: Because I remember like somebody being like you gave me this gift, but like you wanted it, like you gave me the thing that you wanted and that was, I'm sure was true at the time, like I'm not denying I am not denying this fact but also like it makes me second guess my gift given Right and so this is, and I would.
- 12:05Speaker 1: It's not like big wounding, it's not like you know, these aren't like traumas, these are just like little places where I had some crunch, like a little crunchiness around my capacity to really, really give.
- 12:18Speaker 1: And I was like, really looking at that, and I was seeing some places that shows up in my personal life, seeing some places that shows up in my business, and I was like, ooh, ooh, I hold back from giving fully and completely, which means I must be holding back from receiving fully and completely, because that's, that's just it.
- 12:38Speaker 1: And I sat with some of these, these feelings I had and I let myself just experience like, ooh, the sting of your gift not being received, the thing that you were giving to somebody not being received and and it does hurt and that's.
- 12:52Speaker 1: I think that is a thing that really gets in the way on the giving side, like I feel it, and I feel like it's happened to everybody, where, where we have love to give and somebody does doesn't receive it Right, and we have money to give and somebody doesn't want it or doesn't want to receive it.
- 13:08Speaker 1: We have a gift and or give a compliment even, and somebody doesn't receive it and it almost makes you want to not do it.
- 13:17Speaker 1: Like.
- 13:17Speaker 1: Sometimes I will hesitate for just a second when I'm, when I wanted to give somebody a compliment, because, because I've given people compliments and have gotten responses like this whole thing I got at Macy's 45 years ago for $4.
- 13:32Speaker 1: You're clearly an idiot for thinking I'm beautiful, right, like where, or sometimes people don't receive the compliment and they just throw it right back at you.
- 13:41Speaker 1: You know like, or they don't.
- 13:43Speaker 1: You know they diminish the thing that you've got and sometimes people will flat out reject it Like.
- 13:48Speaker 1: And when you, when you give, when you're like a little vulnerable and you're like oh, I see you, I think you're, I think you're beautiful, I think you're wonderful and somebody's like, I think you're basically an idiot for thinking I'm wonderful and you're like, oh sorry, like I've definitely given compliments that I almost felt sorry for when, when somebody received it so poorly, right?
- 14:11Speaker 1: Anyways, here's where I'm going with this.
- 14:13Speaker 1: Is that giving and receiving?
- 14:15Speaker 1: And so we're the.
- 14:18Speaker 1: In my meditation I realized that I was kind of not giving as fully as I wanted to, and I had to to sit with those feelings and kind of clean that up.
- 14:27Speaker 1: And then the other side.
- 14:28Speaker 1: I know for sure that there are times when I don't necessarily want to receive things.
- 14:34Speaker 1: Right.
- 14:35Speaker 1: I sometimes I get in my own way around that.
- 14:40Speaker 1: Not so much anymore.
- 14:42Speaker 1: I'm actually pretty conscious of it at this point, but there were times where I didn't think what I was bringing to the table was worth it.
- 14:54Speaker 1: I didn't ask for raises, I didn't ask for the things, and sometimes I didn't even want to receive the things that were offered not even asked for but just offered.
- 15:06Speaker 1: So giving and receiving, those are some places to put a little attention and you can look at it in the realm of money.
- 15:12Speaker 1: But giving and receiving and exchange is an energy that is really throughout your whole life.
- 15:18Speaker 1: It's not just a financial energy.
- 15:20Speaker 1: Although you'll see it in your energy.
- 15:23Speaker 1: It will also show up Two places are really loud is in your money and in your sex life.
- 15:27Speaker 1: Those are places where the giving and receiving and that energy of exchange becomes really, really clear.
- 15:33Speaker 1: So if you're feeling a little sticky in one of the other, I would look at both of them to see any places where you hold back from giving or you don't let yourself receive, where you kind of get in the way of your own receiving in either of those ways, all right.
- 15:49Speaker 1: So the other two skills that we want to have are really around having or accumulating and growing.
- 15:57Speaker 1: So when it comes to money, let me say this one so giving and receiving is about flow.
- 16:02Speaker 1: So flowing money is money coming in, money going out, money coming in, money going out.
- 16:08Speaker 1: Having money is about your capacity to one, let that money chill out in your bank account and two, build the things that start to make their own money and listen, all money gets spent.
- 16:24Speaker 1: All money gets spent.
- 16:25Speaker 1: All of this is an exchange.
- 16:27Speaker 1: But so look, if I take my money to the stock market and I buy myself some shares of ExxonMobil, for example, I'm gonna trade in my money, my cash, and I'm gonna buy a bit of that company.
- 16:43Speaker 1: I'm gonna buy myself a share of that company Now.
- 16:49Speaker 1: I'm hoping, when I buy that, that I'm going to get paid back in dividends, which is my share of the profit from my one share of the company, and I'm hoping for capital appreciation.
- 16:58Speaker 1: I'm hoping that I'm gonna buy that share at whatever price it is today and that in a couple of years it will be worth more than that.
- 17:06Speaker 1: So it is an exchange.
- 17:09Speaker 1: I want you to remember that it is an exchange, but the purpose of it is different.
- 17:15Speaker 1: Having money and letting money be in your life, letting money serve a buffer like a moat Like a moat is kind of it puts a little distance between you and just like life level nonsense, right Like if you have six months of money in the bank and you lose your job, like you have a minute you can sort out.
- 17:39Speaker 1: You're not desperate, you have six months to figure out what you're gonna do.
- 17:42Speaker 1: Not that it wouldn't feel bad, it would, but you have a little time and so that's around like that's that having this piece and it's what it really having is about having needs that are smaller than your haves.
- 18:02Speaker 1: So that's kind of where the skill comes in.
- 18:04Speaker 1: It's saying I have more than I need, and that difference is what we can save and what we can eventually grow right, and so that's like a really nurturing quality to our money.
- 18:16Speaker 1: It's like people who have really great portfolios tend to them like the same way that you would tend to your garden or tend to your kids.
- 18:24Speaker 1: There's an investment of time and energy and effort, and that growing piece, that nurturing that tending, is a very feminine quality, where that accumulation and waiting and protecting and buffering is a very masculine quality.
- 18:37Speaker 1: And so they're both masculine and feminine energies, ones that exchange, and that's more of an immediate, more of a I'm gonna work for you, I'm gonna get a paycheck.
- 18:48Speaker 1: I'm gonna go to the store, I'm gonna buy my oranges, I'm gonna get my oranges.
- 18:52Speaker 1: There's a quickness of fluidity where having is something that's a little bit slower, not a little bit slower, it's slower.
- 19:01Speaker 1: Like saving six months of income is no small financial goal.
- 19:05Speaker 1: That is not a quick financial goal that takes years to do.
- 19:09Speaker 1: Six months of income takes years to save that much money, and growing your investments is also something that takes a lifetime.
- 19:16Speaker 1: And so it's just the same kind of thing, but they're a little bit different, especially in the way that we see them and operate them.
- 19:23Speaker 1: So some ways that we can expand on these things is just paying attention, and I will tell you that having money can be deeply and profoundly uncomfortable.
- 19:34Speaker 1: So that is a thing that sometimes we have to stretch our capacity into.
- 19:39Speaker 1: The first time that I had more than $10,000 in my checking account or, yeah, like in my regular, like checking account man, I had a tough time with that.
- 19:52Speaker 1: I had to.
- 19:53Speaker 1: My brain started giving me a zillion things to do with that money.
- 19:58Speaker 1: Now that money was all gonna be used.
- 19:59Speaker 1: It was all money that was going places.
- 20:01Speaker 1: It was all money that, like, eventually I will use in my household and I like having money in my bank accounts.
- 20:06Speaker 1: I feel better when I have money in my bank accounts.
- 20:09Speaker 1: So for me, having $10,000 in my checking account is like a comfort.
- 20:12Speaker 1: It feels good and I like it.
- 20:16Speaker 1: But when that threshold happened and I broke my comfort zone around having, my brain was blank.
- 20:22Speaker 1: You could pay off this, you could do this, you could buy a new couch, you could buy new windows, that's it.
- 20:27Speaker 1: Like it was coming up with a thousand different reasons to spend that money and I had to really practice having it because I was really good at that exchange piece, but it took it took me some practice to be better at having, and so that's the thing that that I just want to acknowledge is Something that we grow into and it's something that we will often have money and then have to use it and then we have to do it again, and there's nothing wrong with that.
- 20:53Speaker 1: That's part of the process.
- 20:54Speaker 1: But that having money piece Is something that that we want to grow our capacity to do.
- 21:00Speaker 1: We want to, we want to get good at saving money and we.
- 21:03Speaker 1: What that really shows us is where, how we prioritize ourselves, how we prioritize our future, because that's the money that you're keeping, that's the money that you're taking to buy an investment that's gonna pay you, that will eventually set your time free, you know that's so how highly we prioritize that having and that investing, it is a really good indication of where we value ourselves and how well we keep our needs smaller than what we have, because wealth isn't really about income.
- 21:36Speaker 1: It's really not like and it can be about income, and sometimes I will suggest things like making more money.
- 21:42Speaker 1: Sometimes I see somebody's math and I'm like, well, we could either really cut back your lifestyle or you could make more money, and a lot of times I'll suggest making more money.
- 21:50Speaker 1: So it's not that it's never to have a bigger exchange, but sometimes it's really just about learning how to have, learning how to sit with your money, learning how to have that potential power in your bank account at your disposal but not be so ready to exchange it.
- 22:08Speaker 1: It says like there's a slowness, there's an ownership of time with that.
- 22:13Speaker 1: It's like, ooh, when the time is right, I'm gonna take this action.
- 22:15Speaker 1: So there's like a quality of, you know, biting Wednesday, like like waiting, you know, like not rushing right, like so there's.
- 22:25Speaker 1: It's an ownership of money and also an ownership of time.
- 22:29Speaker 1: And having an Accumulating and growing money slowly and the same thing for that tending that growing piece, you know, trying to make your investments grow faster than make sense is like one of the surest ways to but for your, for your investments to not be successful I forget there's like a pretty famous quote somewhere.
- 22:47Speaker 1: It's like when you ask money to do things, that it's like it's impossible or impractical for money to do them.
- 22:53Speaker 1: The money will disappear.
- 22:55Speaker 1: And so it's like if you're gonna take your money and trade it in for penny stocks and stock options and create, you know, really risky things To try to get a very fast return, like it doesn't.
- 23:05Speaker 1: It doesn't work very well and so that growth in tending to your investments, to your portfolio, that's a that's also a skill that we want to learn and we want to have and that's that's very much a practical skill.
- 23:18Speaker 1: Like you have to.
- 23:19Speaker 1: You know you have to kind of learn some things Understand, you know, learn the lingo, you know, understand dividends, learn how to read financial reports.
- 23:27Speaker 1: There's, there's some work to do in the tending, no matter what your investment is, whether or not it's your business, real estate I mean, I was talking about stock market portfolios but this giving and receiving, and having and growing, these are four skills that you want to have and I'll tell you a quick story before we wrap up.
- 23:45Speaker 1: So I have a client in my limitless wealth mastermind who actually graduated pretty recently and In our work together she increased her flow quite a bit.
- 23:54Speaker 1: So her business grew, her revenue grew, her take home income went from like four thousand dollars a month to fifteen thousand dollars a month In the year that we were together.
- 24:03Speaker 1: But when at the end of the year we were looking at her money and there was still very low having.
- 24:10Speaker 1: You know, I was looking, I was like, hey, you know what's going on with your savings account.
- 24:15Speaker 1: She's like, oh, you know, I'm I'm flowing this money, like I'm in the flow with it, and I was like cool, you know, and she did a beautiful job and she had plenty of money to flow.
- 24:24Speaker 1: And I was like the next skill that you really need to learn is how to have money, because that's that next level, like masculine protection with your money.
- 24:35Speaker 1: It's like when your money is giving a buffer to your life.
- 24:38Speaker 1: It's like you know if your business has a bump, you know you're cushioned by that money.
- 24:44Speaker 1: Like, and so when we're talking about having money, you know in my invisible system and you know, you know the things that I teach.
- 24:52Speaker 1: I often talk about paying yourself first and I'm not I mean that this is not my idea like paying yourself first.
- 24:57Speaker 1: I mean I think the richest man about Babylon was talking about that and I'm sure it wasn't that person's idea either.
- 25:05Speaker 1: Forget who wrote that book Pay yourself first.
- 25:08Speaker 1: But that says that you're having this, you prioritize yourself first and in doing that, it actually increases the size of your flow.
- 25:17Speaker 1: Intending to your money carefully, you know, makes money feel safe to show up with you.
- 25:21Speaker 1: So these are that, some of the four skills that you know.
- 25:25Speaker 1: These are really big picture things that Increase your financial well-being in time.
- 25:30Speaker 1: So I hope you go and you get fully and you receive fully and you have and you accumulate and you attend to your money gardens and you know you have grow the richest, most abundant life ever.
- 25:43Speaker 1: I love you, I appreciate you and please feel free to share my podcast with your friends and relatives and anybody else.
- 25:51Speaker 1: It was my pleasure and joy to talk with you today.
- 25:58Speaker 1: Thank you for listening.
- 25:59Speaker 1: If you found value in our conversation, I kindly ask you to share the show with a friend who deserves to unleash her financial power.
- 26:06Speaker 1: Your feedback is so, so valuable to me, so please take a moment to leave a review.
- 26:11Speaker 1: Together we can amplify the message and bring more money into the hands of good women for ongoing guidance and Unwavering support on your financial journey.
- 26:20Speaker 1: I invite you to join the cash confident community.
- 26:22Speaker 1: Visit wwwcashconfidentcom.
- 26:26Speaker 1: Slash.
- 26:27Speaker 1: Join to become part of our powerful Community of women, where we uplift and inspire one another to reach new heights of financial success.
- 26:36Speaker 1: Remember, you possess the power to shape your financial destiny and with the cash confident podcast and the support of our remarkable community, you are unstoppable.
- 26:45Speaker 1: Embrace your financial power, create the life you desire and let's ignite a movement of cash confident women who are transforming the world.
- 26:54Speaker 1: One dollar, one decision at a time.