Latest / The Talent Brief / I Don't Know What This Is Yet
Transcript
- Jeff Ganter: Today's one of those days. It's overcast, rainy, quiet, and I'm struggling. Not in some dramatic everything is falling apart kind of way. I'm just having a really hard time getting myself going. And normally, this is probably where I'd wait to record something until I figured out what was going on. Until I had the lesson. Until I could put into some kind of box and say, ⁓ that's what this was. But I don't have that today. So I'm recording this while I'm still in it. I know movement helps me. Running helps. Tennis helps. Getting outside helps. There are things I can do that give my brain that little spark it's looking for. And yet today, knowing all of that isn't making it any easier to actually do any of it. That's the part I'm sitting with. Because almost immediately I can hear myself trying to solve it. Come on, Jeff. Go for a run. Get outside. You'll feel better. Stop procrastinating. Just start. And maybe I will. But I've been thinking a lot lately about what happens in that space between knowing what might help and actually being able to begin. Because I don't think I'm lazy. I don't think I don't care. And I don't think another productivity hack is what I'm looking for today. I just can't seem to find the gear. And my instinct is to figure out why. Is it ADHD? Is it procrastination? Am I bored? Do I need a dopamine head? Is it the weather? Am I tired? Am I avoiding something? What the hell is going on? And then I caught myself doing something interesting. I was trying to put the feeling into a box. Name it. Explain it solve it because apparently just experiencing something without understanding it makes me uncomfortable too. And maybe that's what I'm noticing today. I don't know what it what this is yet. Am I trying to let it be okay? That's harder than it sounds. Because I'm someone who likes to understand things. I look for patterns. It's part of how I've spent much of my career, and frankly, it's part of how I understand myself. I'm a processor by nature. Something happens and I want to know why. Then I want to know what I'm supposed to do about it. But what if there isn't always something to do? What if sometimes the first thing to do is just notice? Right now, I notice that I'm restless. I notice that I want something to change how I'm feeling. I notice that I know several things I could do. And I notice that I don't participate. Particularly want to do any of them. That's where I am. No breakthrough. No five step solution. No inspirational ending where I tell you I put on my running shoes, went outside in the rain, and suddenly everything made sense. Hell, I might finish recording this and sit right back down. I don't know. And weirdly, that's why I wanted to record this today instead of waiting. Because I think we spend a lot of time telling our stories after we've figured them out, after we've connected the dots, after we've made sense of them. But life doesn't happen that way. Sometimes you're just sitting in the middle of something thinking, what is this? And maybe we don't always need to carry that qu answer that question immediately. Maybe we n maybe we can get curious before we get corrective. Maybe I don't need to turn today into a problem. Maybe I don't need to make myself productive enough to feel better about it. Maybe I can simply notice that something feels different today. And give myself enough room to find out what it is. Or maybe tomorrow I'll wake up and think, ⁓ I was just having a shitty day. And that's possible too. I don't know. And that's where I'm gonna leave this one. I don't know if I'm gonna run today. I don't know if I'm gonna play tennis. I don't know if I'm gonna to figure any of this out. But I am going to try something that for me might actually be harder. I'm going to resist the urge to immediately fix it. And I'm gonna pay attention to what happens next. Thanks for listening. See ya soon. Bye.