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The 5 Money Decisions Smart Women Regret- Money Manifestation Chapter 11 · Rock My Finances

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Speaker 3: Welcome to the Rock My Finances Show on k for
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Speaker 3: HD Radio and Talk for TV, where we put the
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Speaker 3: fund in finance joint powerhouse Jeffer Jos CDFA CMC and
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Speaker 3: Private Wealth Advisor as she collaborates with you to create clarity,
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Speaker 3: control and confidence with your money, your way. It's not
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Speaker 3: about the zeros. So what is it all about? Let's
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Speaker 3: find out now. Here's your host and weekly friend, Jennifer Jose.
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Speaker 2: Welcome back to Rock My Finances. This is our Money
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Speaker 2: Manifestation series. This is chapter ten. Why you sabotage money
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Speaker 2: even when things start going well? Good question, right, okay,
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Speaker 2: so why does everything seem to fall apart right when
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Speaker 2: your finances start improving and everything's really good. Have you
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Speaker 2: ever noticed that maybe you're saving more, you're earning more,
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Speaker 2: you're feeling in more control, and then all of a
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Speaker 2: sudden something happens. You overspend, maybe you start avoiding something,
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Speaker 2: you stop looking at your bills, you stop keeping control
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Speaker 2: of your money, or you just make a decision that
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Speaker 2: you know you should not be making, like dang it,
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Speaker 2: I wish I would have done that, should have what
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Speaker 2: it could is right, Then suddenly you're right back where
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Speaker 2: you started again. Well, I'll have to tell you this
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Speaker 2: is not bad luck. This is not just chance, This
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Speaker 2: is not what the stark market does. This is not
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Speaker 2: out of anybody else's control. This is a pattern. I
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Speaker 2: see this all the time. A woman will start gaining momentum,
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Speaker 2: she's finally tracking her money, she's looking at her she's
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Speaker 2: loving it, enjoying it, even spending it. She's feeling really confident,
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Speaker 2: things are in the flow, she's feeling really really good,
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Speaker 2: and then out of nowhere. She says, I don't know
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Speaker 2: what happened. I just fell off. But here's the truth.
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Speaker 2: She didn't just fall off. Basically, she just returned to
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Speaker 2: what feels familiar. So the truth here is your nervous
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Speaker 2: system will always choose what's familiar over what is better
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Speaker 2: for you. Or in another way, it's familiar what anything
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Speaker 2: that feels familiar versus trying something new. So when something
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Speaker 2: feels predictable, known, safe, it feels familiar. Right, even when
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Speaker 2: it's stressful or chaotic, or you feel like there's drama
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Speaker 2: there or it's inconsistency or you're just getting by, If
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Speaker 2: that's familiar, that's what your brain is going to try
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Speaker 2: to find. Your subconscious is going to try to find that.
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Speaker 2: Have you ever said that? You know, you've dated a
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Speaker 2: lot of same people. They look different on the outside,
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Speaker 2: but basically you end up feeling the same way in
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Speaker 2: the in the relationship. And it's because we were Our body,
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Speaker 2: our brain, our chemistry, our nervous system, everything wants to
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Speaker 2: just feel familiar because that's what they're It's what our
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Speaker 2: whole body and system is used to. So our system
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Speaker 2: doesn't care if it's good for us. Our system doesn't
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Speaker 2: care if it's drama producing or lymphatic system charging or anything, right.
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Speaker 2: It just wants to know if it's familiar. So we
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Speaker 2: all have an internal that point, we have a level
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Speaker 2: of success that we're used to, a level of money
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Speaker 2: that we're used to. I call that energy, right. We're
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Speaker 2: used to a certain amount of energy or money in
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Speaker 2: our bank accounts. We're used to a certain amount of
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Speaker 2: ease in our life. Might be totally chaotic, but we're
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Speaker 2: used to it. So our system is used to that.
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Speaker 2: And when we change that, something says, wait, hang on,
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Speaker 2: this isn't normal. So what happens We create a problem,
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Speaker 2: or we make a reactive decision about something, or we
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Speaker 2: pull ourselves back down into the Have you ever felt
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Speaker 2: like a judging judy to start judging everyone else, which
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Speaker 2: means you're truly judging yourself. We start to get angry,
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Speaker 2: we start to get snappy, like we whatever it might be.
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Speaker 2: When we start to feel out of consistency things, we
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Speaker 2: start attracting things that might not be so good for us,
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Speaker 2: so we don't rise to our goals. We actually fall
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Speaker 2: back to our comfort zone. That's what our body is
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Speaker 2: trying to have us do at all time times we
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Speaker 2: have an internal set point and always wants to get
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Speaker 2: back to that. I don't know if you all are
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Speaker 2: familiar with law abtraction or Abraham Hicks, which I love.
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Speaker 2: So Abraham would call this your vibrational set point. So
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Speaker 2: if we are all energy, we are all vibrating at
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Speaker 2: a certain pace. Right, So we have a I call
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Speaker 2: it a temperature. We all have a certain temperature that
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Speaker 2: we used to live in our lives at. And so
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Speaker 2: when our level of money or ease or receiving money
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Speaker 2: match that, we do it year after year after year.
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Speaker 2: We get used to that. So it's not just what
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Speaker 2: we want or what we think we deserve, but it's
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Speaker 2: what our body is used to feeling. So we have
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Speaker 2: to break that. If we've practiced a certain level of money,
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Speaker 2: success and stress and ease, that's become familiar. That's what
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Speaker 2: our body wants to shift back into. So when more
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Speaker 2: money comes in things start to feel easier. Our system
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Speaker 2: doesn't want to just celebrate. It wants to get back
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Speaker 2: to familiarity, so it'll go shopping. It like it's a
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Speaker 2: whole separate system readiness, right, it could be our little girl,
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Speaker 2: like whatever we're not used to we could start going shopping,
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Speaker 2: or we twist our ankle and create medical bills, or
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Speaker 2: we'll say yes to this big trip to Italy, or
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Speaker 2: you know, so many different things. We just don't know
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Speaker 2: how to hang on to it. So, like Abraham would say,
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Speaker 2: you're now experiencing the gap between how you feel, what
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Speaker 2: your body's used to, and more money coming in, which
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Speaker 2: is what you've always dreamed of, which you've been manifesting,
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Speaker 2: which is what you want to step into. But there's
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Speaker 2: a gap there from what we desire and what we're
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Speaker 2: living and what we're used to. So our vibration, our
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Speaker 2: temperature is at a certain level and it's used to that.
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Speaker 2: So we have to raise our vibration. Or this new
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Speaker 2: money that has come in, or this new income or
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Speaker 2: this new whatever it is, we have to raise our temperature,
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Speaker 2: raise our vibration to make that the normal. Does that
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Speaker 2: make sense? So even though we want more money, and
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Speaker 2: we've attracted more money, which is great, we may not
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Speaker 2: be fully allowing it yet we haven't stepped into that norm.
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Speaker 2: Which I totally did this. I've done this so many times,
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Speaker 2: so I will make a great Like my income is
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Speaker 2: fluctuating each year and so I'll make a great amount
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Speaker 2: of income one year and the next year back down
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Speaker 2: to where I started. Again, It's like, what is that?
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Speaker 2: So it's it's the stepping into that person that's making
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Speaker 2: that lot of money, making that amount of money. So
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Speaker 2: I have to rise, raise my temperature, rise to that
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Speaker 2: challenge of who am I going to be now making
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Speaker 2: this type of income because for me it does equate
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Speaker 2: subconsciously to worth or value or success and all that stuff. Right,
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Speaker 2: So law of attraction responds to your dominant vibration, not
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Speaker 2: your goals, but what you are vibrating at, where our
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Speaker 2: temperature is set at. So we unconsciously move back to
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Speaker 2: what feels normal. So creating the problem making a rust
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Speaker 2: rushed emotional decision. I'm gonna sneeze, I'm trying not to, Okay.
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Speaker 2: We could be overthinking something over and over and over again.
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Speaker 2: We could be spending too much. Have you ever had
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Speaker 2: that retail therapy thought or a trip to home goods
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Speaker 2: and fill your car with something or a lot of things. Right,
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Speaker 2: we could be pulling back and not going places, not
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Speaker 2: doing things, questioning everything, not because we're doing it. If
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Speaker 2: there's anything wrong with doing that, it's just that we're
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Speaker 2: doing it because we're trying to stay at our old system.
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Speaker 2: My cat's trying to jump off my lap. No, Luna, no,
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Speaker 2: So we want our body wants to stay where it's
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Speaker 2: used to staying. So we don't ride to the goals,
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Speaker 2: but we return to our practiced vibration or the temperature
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Speaker 2: that we're used to, which equates to the income that
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Speaker 2: we used to be making, the spending that we used
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Speaker 2: to spend that we're used to spending, the drama, the chaos,
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Speaker 2: all of that that we're used to doing. It takes
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Speaker 2: work on our part to shift these things. We want
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Speaker 2: to shift these into the new person that we want
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Speaker 2: to step into, becoming more money, more success, more joy,
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Speaker 2: and more love, more everything. Going to get my cat
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Speaker 2: because she's going to knock down my microphone. She's gonna
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Speaker 2: knock down everything. Okay, here she is. This is Luna.
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Speaker 2: If you guys are on video, okay, So we want
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Speaker 2: to reframe this, right, We want to be okay with
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Speaker 2: this new person that we're coming. We want to up
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Speaker 2: our fixed point and we want to be practicing emotionally
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Speaker 2: stepping into that. So if in the past you've practiced
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Speaker 2: worry and that feels normal to you, or pressure and
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Speaker 2: that feels normal to you, or scarcity mode and that
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Speaker 2: feels normal to you. Then the new things are going
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Speaker 2: to feel foreign, like ease or flow or abundance. That's
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Speaker 2: going to feel unstable and suspicious. It's going to feel
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Speaker 2: very uneasy when things calm down. I was just talking
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Speaker 2: to a friend of mine who's dating, and I was saying, okay,
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Speaker 2: back in the day, you know, I mean I was
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Speaker 2: raised in an alcoholic home, dysfunctional home, so you know,
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Speaker 2: we had never knew what was going to happen each day,
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Speaker 2: and so when you get used to living that way,
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Speaker 2: you look for that type of a lifestyle, so you know,
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Speaker 2: check out of the egg what comes first. And so
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Speaker 2: then when you have a nice, normal, quiet, normal relationship
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Speaker 2: or job or daily life, you're you're you're almost like
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Speaker 2: looking around like what's wrong or where's the other shoe
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Speaker 2: going to drop her? You know, what's going to happen
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Speaker 2: here because your body is not used to that. So
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Speaker 2: we have to be aware of that so that we
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Speaker 2: can do the work around it, so that we can
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Speaker 2: be used to it. Because I want you all enjoy
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Speaker 2: I want you all in ease. I want you all
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Speaker 2: in flow, and once we get used to that, it's amazing.
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Speaker 2: I can tell you I make the best decisions from
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Speaker 2: my flow state, like it just happens. It just feels
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Speaker 2: so good. It feels amazing. And this is where your
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Speaker 2: coaches come in, y'all. We need coaches to help us.
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Speaker 2: Make this the norm, Make this our vibrational temperature, make
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Speaker 2: this our nice ease flow state normal and feel regular,
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Speaker 2: so that we are not worried about more money. We're
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Speaker 2: worried about allowing it. It's about expanding our ability to
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Speaker 2: receive it, not necessarily to make it because it's already there.
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Speaker 2: It's just they're waiting for us. But we have to
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Speaker 2: step into that badass person that we know we want
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Speaker 2: to be. We have to be that person now, no
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Speaker 2: matter where your zeros are on your bank account, we
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Speaker 2: have to feel it before it comes. I hope that
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Speaker 2: makes sense. So we want to raise our stet point,
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Speaker 2: raise our temperature, raise our allowing and what does this
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Speaker 2: look like? Okay, letting things be easier without questioning it. So,
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Speaker 2: if you've ever caught yourself being judging judy, stop it.
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Speaker 2: Stop judging other people. Stop judging other things like knock
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Speaker 2: that out, like, let it just flow. Give everyone the
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Speaker 2: benefit of the doubt, Like they're doing that for a reason.
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Speaker 2: That's happening for a reason. We might have traffic because
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Speaker 2: our angels are helping us not get into an accident.
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Speaker 2: We don't have to know why it is. We just
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Speaker 2: want to be able to be in more flow with life.
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Speaker 2: Have you ever been around that person that's just complaining
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Speaker 2: all the time, negative Nelly, right, just constantly complaining and
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Speaker 2: judging other people. It's just always negative. Let's try to
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Speaker 2: be that positive person. Let's pull it. Let's be positive,
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Speaker 2: Patricia positive, Polly, right. We want to switch that around
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Speaker 2: and just be on the loving side of things and
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Speaker 2: not the fear side of things. So you're trying you're
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Speaker 2: not trying to get more, You're trying to learn how
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Speaker 2: to feel normal having more. Ooh, that's good. Right, let's
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Speaker 2: say that again. We're not trying to get more, attract more.
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Speaker 2: We're trying to feel normal just by having it. So
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Speaker 2: we want to step into that normal part of us.
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Speaker 2: I hope that makes sense. So more money isn't a stretch.
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Speaker 2: It's feeling comfortable with more money that's the stretch. So again,
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Speaker 2: f word y'all my favorite word. We got to feel
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Speaker 2: it to receive it. So when our life expands fast,
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Speaker 2: our nervous system just can't allow it sometimes, so we
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Speaker 2: have to step back. We have to slow down and
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Speaker 2: let our nervous system catch up. We have to do
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Speaker 2: our self talk, do our mantras, do our journaling. Step
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Speaker 2: into this badass person that's becoming more wealthy and allowing
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Speaker 2: all this abundance in this deepens our concept of having
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Speaker 2: the more money, and it bridges our nervous system with
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Speaker 2: our manifestation. So we have to step into this new
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Speaker 2: normal of this badass income, of this more money, this
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Speaker 2: great savings account. You can double your money in your
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Speaker 2: investment account. That's great. You got to step into that
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Speaker 2: person worthy of money. Now, So how does this show up?
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Speaker 2: It's not always obvious spending after progress. Let's say we've
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Speaker 2: got a wonderful, nice safety savings amount in our account
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Speaker 2: and we're really happy with it, and then all of
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Speaker 2: a sudden, we take a bunch of people out to dinner,
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Speaker 2: or pick up the check somewhere, pick up the tab somewhere,
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Speaker 2: or go buy a concert series instead of one concert,
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Speaker 2: buying the entire series for the summer, or like play
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Speaker 2: a play series spending you know, fifteen hundred dollars or
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Speaker 2: two thousand versus you know, one hundred and fifty bucks
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Speaker 2: on one play. It could show up as avoiding looking
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Speaker 2: at all your accounts, not even looking at your money
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Speaker 2: and just spending it, or not spending it at all,
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Speaker 2: not going anywhere, or not doing anything. It could be
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Speaker 2: second guessing every little decision right, pulling back when things
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Speaker 2: are really working, like oh, I don't know what to
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Speaker 2: do next, so I'm going to do nothing, not even
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Speaker 2: reaching out to a coach or an advisor or your
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Speaker 2: tax person, just not doing any saying this feels this
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Speaker 2: feels too good to last, or this is too good
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Speaker 2: to be true, or waiting for the other shoe to drop,
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Speaker 2: or I feel like I'm walking on eggshells around my money.
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Speaker 2: Any of that. You're not really sabotaging your money. You're
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Speaker 2: just regulating your comfort to the money that's already there.
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Speaker 2: So we don't want to regulate our comfort down. We
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Speaker 2: want to increase our comfort moving up. So we want
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Speaker 2: to spend more time in our subconscious spending money, having
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Speaker 2: that money, enjoying that money, seeing all the zeros, seeing
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Speaker 2: all that on our spreadsheet. We want to step into
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Speaker 2: that person that's got it all. So ask yourself, do
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Speaker 2: things tend to fall apart when they start going well?
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Speaker 2: Or do you start to feel uncomfortable when things are
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Speaker 2: at ease? Oh? This could be a relationship around anybody, right,
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Speaker 2: a love relationship, a spouse, your money, jobs, at work, whatever.
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Speaker 2: Let's go different, I mean deeper. Let's go deeper because
15:56
Speaker 2: this pattern doesn't always start with money. It could be
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Speaker 2: learned from any other reason. Right, Stability wasn't constant growing up,
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Speaker 2: feeling stress as normal. Calm might have felt unfamiliar and
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Speaker 2: you had to stay on edge because that's what you
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Speaker 2: were used to. And now when things feel easy, stable,
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Speaker 2: or flowing, your system's going whoop bump bumpah. What else
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Speaker 2: is going to drop? This feels off? It's way too easy.
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Speaker 2: What's going on? Have you ever been in a relationship
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Speaker 2: and go okay, everything's right? I mean, I don't know
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Speaker 2: if you've ever watched Sex in the City, but that
16:26
Speaker 2: totally happens. When when Sarah Jessica Carry is dating Ake
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Speaker 2: Aiden because it's just too easy, like he's just too simple,
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Speaker 2: and she just keeps looking for something to go wrong.
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Speaker 2: So what's what I had a client say to me,
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Speaker 2: Actually is everything is finally good. And I picked a
16:43
Speaker 2: fight with my finances not because anything was wrong, but
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Speaker 2: because everything felt too right. So she kept looking, waiting
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Speaker 2: for the other shoe to drop and wears something hiding.
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Speaker 2: So this is where everything is about to change. This
16:55
Speaker 2: is very empowering. So because once you see this pattern,
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Speaker 2: this is where we can stop reacting to it, like,
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Speaker 2: this is where we can see it and change it.
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Speaker 2: Are you ready?
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Speaker 3: So?
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Speaker 2: Number one, notice the moment when things start going really,
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Speaker 2: really well and then you start feeling discomfort around it
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Speaker 2: or doubt or urgency. Notice that. Number two, do not
17:18
Speaker 2: react immediately. Stop, take a pause. You do not need
17:22
Speaker 2: to fix anything right now. Just sit for a minute.
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Speaker 2: Number three, name it? What does it feel like? Just unsafe?
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Speaker 2: Normally it's unsafe, unfamiliar. I'm not worthy whatever it is.
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Speaker 2: Name that feeling instead of name that tune, remember that show,
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Speaker 2: Name that tune and two notes or four notes, not
17:43
Speaker 2: that one. But I want you to name that f
17:46
Speaker 2: name that feeling. It could just be this is too
17:50
Speaker 2: good to be true, right it just could. I don't
17:52
Speaker 2: deserve this whatever, I'm not worthy of wealth. I had
17:57
Speaker 2: a belief back in my subconscious that I never knew
17:59
Speaker 2: is that until my coach Mayvou actually helped me find it.
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Speaker 2: And I felt that since I could not protect my children.
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Speaker 2: I lost two children when I was twenty nine years old.
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Speaker 2: They passed away and I could not protect them, that
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Speaker 2: I was not worthy of wealth. I did not know
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Speaker 2: that that was there, and so I kept sabotaging everything.
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Speaker 2: And once I saw that, I literally cleared it in
18:21
Speaker 2: three days, like it was clearly, it doesn't need to
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Speaker 2: be years and years and years on the couch, even
18:25
Speaker 2: though I did do that as well, but I cleared
18:29
Speaker 2: that because I was like, oh wait, I did not
18:31
Speaker 2: pull that trigger. I am worthy of wealth, I am
18:34
Speaker 2: worthy of joy, I am worthy of love and happiness,
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Speaker 2: and it's okay. I was a twenty nine year old
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Speaker 2: young woman weighs in a dysfunctional household, making decisions that
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Speaker 2: she could do at that time. Sometimes we have to
18:46
Speaker 2: go back and heal that little girl or that teenager
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Speaker 2: that was bullied or betrayed in high school, or that
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Speaker 2: whoever whatever age we were will be Madi made mistakes.
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Speaker 2: We need to go grab her, hug her, give her
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Speaker 2: a love and say you know, you're okay. You did
19:03
Speaker 2: the best you could and you were who you were
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Speaker 2: at the time, and I've got you. You are safe now,
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Speaker 2: and we got to love up that person, that age
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Speaker 2: of who we were. Right. So we want to step
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Speaker 2: number four. Stay in it. This is where the work is.
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Speaker 2: Where we notice this feeling. We want it to be
19:23
Speaker 2: calm and stable and easy, even if it feels weird.
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Speaker 2: We want to stay in this space as much as possible.
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Speaker 2: The ability is built by staying in the uncomfortable, not
19:37
Speaker 2: reacting to it. So we have to stay in the
19:40
Speaker 2: uncomfortable so that it can become comfortable. We want to
19:45
Speaker 2: anchor that in okay. So this is an identity shift.
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Speaker 2: We want to feel more comfortable with what's not feeling comfortable.
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Speaker 2: This is not about discipline. This is about feeling good
19:57
Speaker 2: with this new identity. Because the version of you who
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Speaker 2: is holding onto money keeps this momentum going, builds this consistency.
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Speaker 2: It's going to be amazing. We're manifesting so much more
20:11
Speaker 2: that's going to be coming into us. The more we
20:14
Speaker 2: can feel comfortable with this level, with this vibration, with
20:17
Speaker 2: this temperature, whatever it's going on, we want to feel
20:21
Speaker 2: really comfortable with this part of it so that it
20:23
Speaker 2: can keep going. We don't want to react the same
20:26
Speaker 2: way as we always used to. Okay, So what would
20:29
Speaker 2: the version of me who feels secure do right now
20:33
Speaker 2: and then pause, stay in that feeling. So what would
20:37
Speaker 2: the versin of me who feels really secure do right now?
20:40
Speaker 2: Like I can feel her right now stepping into I
20:42
Speaker 2: made a good amount of money a couple of years ago.
20:45
Speaker 2: It felt so good. It felt you know, debt was paid,
20:49
Speaker 2: financial freedom was here. It was all good. Bought my house,
20:54
Speaker 2: fixed up my house, bought flooring, bought the backyard, bought
20:56
Speaker 2: all my trees, you know, all that was wonderful. And
21:00
Speaker 2: how did I feel? Okay, that felt really really good.
21:04
Speaker 2: That felt free, That felt clear. I had clarity, I
21:08
Speaker 2: had plans what to do with the money. I had control.
21:12
Speaker 2: I could control where it was, what I was going
21:14
Speaker 2: to spend, and who I was going to spend, and
21:17
Speaker 2: how I was going to spend it. It felt wonderful.
21:20
Speaker 2: I was busy doing that, but I was busy on
21:23
Speaker 2: my terms because the money wasn't going anywhere. It is
21:26
Speaker 2: there until I could figure it all out. So our
21:28
Speaker 2: reframe is you're not losing progress, but we're interrupting that
21:34
Speaker 2: pattern more. The more often we can see that pattern rise,
21:38
Speaker 2: the more often we can interrupt it and say, wait
21:40
Speaker 2: a minute, I do feel calm in this. This is
21:43
Speaker 2: who I am. I can do this. I hope that
21:47
Speaker 2: makes sense. So we're not broken. We didn't make all
21:50
Speaker 2: these huge, gigantic mistakes and constantly making mistakes over and
21:54
Speaker 2: over and over again. No, we literally are changing this pattern,
22:00
Speaker 2: and we're not pushing harder and doing more. We're just noticing, pausing,
22:06
Speaker 2: staying in the uncomfortable so that we can make it
22:09
Speaker 2: more comfortable. Your ability to stay in the good is
22:13
Speaker 2: what creates lasting wealth. Your ability to stay in the
22:18
Speaker 2: good is what creates lasting wealth. Clarity, control, and confidence
22:22
Speaker 2: your three c's that creates your diamond life. I hope
22:26
Speaker 2: this all made sense for you, and I hope you
22:28
Speaker 2: can live in that manifestation that we're receiving and don't
22:32
Speaker 2: worry if it comes and goes. It comes and goes
22:34
Speaker 2: for a while. The better we the more often we
22:36
Speaker 2: do it, the faster it's going to come, the longer
22:40
Speaker 2: it's going to stay, the more familiar it's going to
22:42
Speaker 2: make be, it's going to feel so much more familiar,
22:45
Speaker 2: So don't even worry about that roller coaster. Don't even
22:47
Speaker 2: worry about that at all. The more podcast you listen to,
22:50
Speaker 2: the more coaches you hire, the more work you do
22:53
Speaker 2: staying in that feeling to make it more comfortable, the
22:56
Speaker 2: better you're going to be able to say, Hey, I
22:59
Speaker 2: rock MyD my finances.
23:01
Speaker 3: We appreciate you joining us today, and don't forget to
23:04
Speaker 3: subscribe to the rock my Finances YouTube channel for more
23:08
Speaker 3: engagement and bonus content. Tell me what is your money story?
23:13
Speaker 3: Let's find out with Jennifer right here on K four
23:16
Speaker 3: HD Radio and Talk for TV. It's not about the zero,
23:20
Speaker 3: It's about the F word. Feelings, feelings. Jennifer can't wait
23:24
Speaker 3: to explore with you next week. Until then, let's all say,
23:28
Speaker 3: I rock my finances.