Latest / Pelvic PT Rising / Unseen Heroes of Business Success: A Look at Partner and Family Support

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Unseen Heroes of Business Success: A Look at Partner and Family Support · Pelvic PT Rising

• 0:02
  Speaker 1: In the last 10 years, our field has gone from an unknown specialty to a household name.
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: This brings unprecedented opportunities, but we need to rise up to meet them and give our patients the care that they deserve.
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: In order to help others get better, we need to be better.
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: This podcast will help you to become more confident with your patients, more successful in your practice or business and a leader in pelvic health, and we're going to have some fun along the way.
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: Join us as we rise together.
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: We're Jesse and Nicole Cozine, founders of Pelvic Sanity Physical Therapy and the creators of the Pelvic PT Huddle, and this is Pelvic PT Rising.
• 0:54
  Speaker 2: Hey guys, welcome back to another episode of the Pelvic PT Rising podcast with Jesse and Nicole Cozine.
• 0:58
  Speaker 2: Hey, nicole, hello, talking today about partner and family support, and this is something I know, nicole, that has been on your mind a little bit, as we have started up the business accelerator program and we're seeing everybody in that group together.
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: So one of the things that, first of all, we're so excited about the accelerator group.
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: There's over 130 people in this that are looking to transform their business over the next six months, But one of the things in the onboarding section of the group, we actually have everybody state a bunch of things that they pledge to do during the six months, And one of those things is essentially, in so many words, keep your eyes on your own paper.
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: One of the blessings in the curse of being in a community-based group like this, where we have them all in a Facebook group, is the comparisonitis, The oh well, they're doing this, they seem similar to me and they're growing faster than me.
• 1:54
  Speaker 1: Or the flip side is that you can think that you're doing so amazing, I'm just doing so great, and they're worse because they're not growing as fast as I am.
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: So it's this weird dichotomy between trying to run your own race and do what you just need to do and keep your eyes on your own paper, versus also like peeking around at who else is doing what and comparing yourself to those folks.
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: And one of the biggest variability in how well people grow is partner and family support.
• 2:29
  Speaker 2: I think that's something that we often don't like to acknowledge.
• 2:32
  Speaker 2: I think it's something that sometimes feels like a little bit like cheating for people like us, who do have a lot of partner support.
• 2:41
  Speaker 2: Clearly, we're on this podcast together.
• 2:43
  Speaker 2: Still, seven years in, we have not murdered each other.
• 2:46
  Speaker 2: But if I do suspiciously go missing, i want a full investigation.
• 2:51
  Speaker 2: Full investigation.
• 2:53
  Speaker 2: Right, it's been a close thing a couple of times, but that's been a huge factor in our growth And so we know sometimes, when you're looking around, first of all, you know Instagram and social media always paints a rosier picture than the actual truth is.
• 3:08
  Speaker 2: I can tell you that from now, having worked with I mean we're closing in on 500 businesses we've worked with, i don't think anyone has ever had a business that truly including us, by the way that truly matches what their social media presence looks like.
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: Yeah, because you know you were not posting.
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: Oh, this person laughed.
• 3:23
  Speaker 2: Gave their notice today I mean we had a rough day with the scheduling.
• 3:27
  Speaker 2: We had two people cancel, the schedule is full of holes and we were trying to fill it in, like you're not hearing all of the negative stuff.
• 3:33
  Speaker 2: So there's that to realize as well.
• 3:36
  Speaker 2: But you know, we grew to a point where we had five full time clinicians in less than three years.
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: Right, and I can remember being on a podcast, a business podcast, and I can remember it was sort of like at the almost at the pinnacle or at the peak of that growth, and I was being sought out by a couple of different folks in the business coaching field no-transcript, how are you doing it?
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: How are you doing it?
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: And a lot of people reached out after those podcasts And they're like, wow, you just grown so fast.
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: And I'm like, yeah, but also I had a Jesse and we didn't have kids.
• 4:14
  Speaker 1: We always said before Clay, we had cats, not kids.
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: There's a lot of reasons why that worked for us and why that was our path, and so I feel like this is going to be a podcast to sort of bring back the.
• 4:28
  Speaker 1: What is that called?
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: Bring back the curtain.
• 4:30
  Speaker 2: Pull back the curtain.
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: Or that pull back the curtain on some of the behind the scenes stuff that you may or may not have.
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: That can really influence how fast you're growing, and it doesn't necessarily influence how big you can get or how successful you can be, but sometimes it does, quite frankly, change the trajectory of that line.
• 4:54
  Speaker 2: And I would say this is one of those.
• 4:56
  Speaker 2: It's probably in the top three things.
• 4:58
  Speaker 2: If I was going to predict someone's business success and we've now seen a lot of businesses go through our programs one of the top three things I would want to know is how much spousal, partner or family support that people have.
• 5:11
  Speaker 2: I think it's that key And as opposed to all of the other business things that we're talking about.
• 5:16
  Speaker 2: So if you are in business or if you're thinking about starting your business, think about these types of support.
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: So I really have five different categories that we put this into.
• 5:26
  Speaker 2: One is negative support, and this oftentimes kind of manifests as having to prove that your business is a viable entity.
• 5:34
  Speaker 2: You've got somebody who's we've had people who have had like family members who have been in the medical field who think that a cash based practice would never work, no one would ever pay money for services, or a partner who is really apprehensive about the idea of entrepreneurship, about you know, there's some people who have had negative experiences with that in their past or in their family history.
• 5:55
  Speaker 2: So you can identify sometimes when it's actually kind of negative somebody's opinion about what you're going to be doing, and that can certainly be an anchor into what you're doing.
• 6:04
  Speaker 2: Not only are you trying to build a business, but you're trying to prove to your partner, to your family, that this is a viable concept, and that's that's a lot of time and mental bandwidth.
• 6:14
  Speaker 1: Totally, and it's something that can sort of derail you from putting your energy into the positive things.
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: You always have to defend yourself to convince somebody else that meets something to you, and it doesn't mean that these people are bad people at all.
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: It just means that, well, some of them can be a little asshole-ish, but, you know, it doesn't necessarily mean that they're bad people, especially if it's your spouse that's doing that.
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: I mean you picked them for a reason, so it's not always that it's like this.
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: They're terrible people, but they're certainly not helping in this growth phase and in this mindset and really truly supporting you in that way And in fact it can actually detract from you.
• 6:53
  Speaker 1: You're always second-guessing yourself.
• 6:54
  Speaker 1: It's almost like they're doing a little gas, sliding a little bit.
• 6:56
  Speaker 1: They're making you second-guess the research and the gut feeling and the hard work that you're doing.
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: They're actually by questioning you all of the time and making you prove all of these things when, by the way, most of them don't know anything about business anyways, and they certainly usually don't know about the cash-based pelvic floor PT model.
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: So you're having to convince them and to have conversations with them about a subject that they're not experts in usually And it's just like, but it causes you to second-guess yourself.
• 7:31
  Speaker 1: And it's just, you're in this weird like what the fuck is going on, like how is this even happening?
• 7:36
  Speaker 1: Why are I thought you're supposed to be supportive of me?
• 7:39
  Speaker 1: But now I'm having to, like, have all these conversations with you and every single time I have a win, i'm having to justify it to you and to say that that can happen again, and it just gets exhausting, quite frankly.
• 7:50
  Speaker 2: It's like being on trial I think it's the right way to put it After having seen a couple of our folks who have been in these kinds of situations and again.
• 7:56
  Speaker 2: Nicole said it best it doesn't mean that the person who's questioning you is a bad person, but that can be fear, that can be money, mindset issues There's a lot of stuff that can go into that but it's you're on trial.
• 8:06
  Speaker 2: Everything in the business is either like supporting you and like, hey, see, this is a possibility, or it's supporting their position of see, i told you this thing was going to fail And everything is viewed through that lens, and we can't ever learn, we can't grow.
• 8:19
  Speaker 2: It's just you're constantly feeling like you're on trial.
• 8:22
  Speaker 1: And then the other thing about just being on trial, like that.
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: It's always like this too, they try to have it both ways.
• 8:27
  Speaker 1: They try to.
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: Every win is like a fluke, and then every Lost that you have, every challenge is like we'll see, i told you this is gonna be difficult.
• 8:37
  Speaker 1: See, i told you we're never gonna be home.
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: See, i told you we're gonna be able to take care of the kids, you know, and it's like but no, you don't get it both ways.
• 8:44
  Speaker 1: You need to also pay attention to the things that are showing us that like this can work.
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: And yeah, it's gonna take time and no, it's not gonna be perfect and all the things.
• 8:52
  Speaker 1: But that is the one category of Family or partner support.
• 8:57
  Speaker 1: Is this like really kind of negative, icky, not with you support?
• 9:03
  Speaker 2: and don't Underestimate that the anchoring effect that can have on the growth of your business.
• 9:09
  Speaker 2: Right, it's like doing wind sprints with those big parachutes drab behind you and you can.
• 9:14
  Speaker 2: You can still grow, and we've actually seen people Do an amazing job and grow, and sometimes partners come around as they start seeing more and more proof of the things that are working, and Sometimes it just takes a little bit of time.
• 9:25
  Speaker 2: So it doesn't mean that if you don't have, you have this kind of negative The aspect in your life doesn't mean that you can't grow a business, but I will tell you, it's certainly more difficult.
• 9:34
  Speaker 2: And so the next category that we have, so we have negative support.
• 9:37
  Speaker 2: The next one is really no support, and this is a partner or family member who just isn't anti.
• 9:43
  Speaker 2: You're not on trial There's.
• 9:44
  Speaker 2: You know.
• 9:45
  Speaker 2: They might be verbally supported, but just like not able to, at this stage of life, provide a lot of support.
• 9:51
  Speaker 2: They have a really busy job of their own.
• 9:54
  Speaker 2: They are Maybe running their own business, maybe they are getting another degree.
• 9:59
  Speaker 2: Whatever it is there, they just don't have the bandwidth to truly be supportive.
• 10:03
  Speaker 2: Maybe they don't have the inclination as well, maybe it's not something that they want to talk about at the dinner table.
• 10:08
  Speaker 2: They're the kind of person who wants to work the eight to five and then come home and Not think about work again and aren't really into it when you're like nine o'clock at night Or you guys are rolling over to go to bed and you're like hey did.
• 10:20
  Speaker 2: I tell you about this really cool patient call I had today.
• 10:22
  Speaker 2: They're like I literally don't want to talk about that, right now.
• 10:25
  Speaker 1: Yeah, to that, to Jesse's point a little bit Sometimes like they just don't care.
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: It's not that they're they are negative about it, it's just like I literally don't care, like if you're, if your mouth's moving and you're talking about business, they're like in their head, they're like I, your mouth is moving and I literally don't care what you're talking about right now.
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: And so I think that that's also an interesting thing.
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: It's not as Challenging, i feel like, but it can be challenging in that way, because then you, you still feel like you're on this island and in the lack of support, even if it's not negative, can still be an anchor point for Your growth.
• 11:04
  Speaker 1: Or it's like you're, you still have the parachute on it, just maybe has a little bit of a hole in it So you can move a little faster, but it's still challenging sometimes.
• 11:12
  Speaker 2: Absolutely, and so it's another area to just that.
• 11:15
  Speaker 2: You know, are you in that?
• 11:16
  Speaker 2: no support category.
• 11:17
  Speaker 2: The next category we have is indirect support.
• 11:20
  Speaker 2: So they're not actually helping with anything in the business.
• 11:23
  Speaker 2: But, man, they are committed to helping you grow.
• 11:25
  Speaker 2: They are gonna be taking the kids on certain days, they're gonna be trying to cook dinner.
• 11:29
  Speaker 2: They're going to be doing anything that they can to take other things off your plate.
• 11:34
  Speaker 2: Because they know that you're growing a business, they're supportive of it.
• 11:37
  Speaker 2: They may not have the inclination, the skills, anything else to actually really support the business directly, but they're doing their darn level best to help support your dreams with this.
• 11:47
  Speaker 2: That can be family members a lot of times.
• 11:50
  Speaker 2: That is Cool somebody's gonna come in if you have kids and like help take care of kids, that can be a huge blessing as you get going.
• 11:57
  Speaker 2: And again, if you're comparing, these different things, there's a huge difference between somebody who has you know.
• 12:02
  Speaker 2: For example, i remember somebody in our group was talking to her mom when she was gonna start the business and her mom was like, well, i'll come in and watch the kids two full days a week, so that takes that pressure off of her.
• 12:12
  Speaker 2: She's able to have that support.
• 12:14
  Speaker 2: You're going to grow faster because of those 16 hours of support that you're getting.
• 12:18
  Speaker 2: Even though it's not directly into the business, it still makes a massive, massive difference.
• 12:23
  Speaker 1: So same thing with like things like cooking dinner right.
• 12:26
  Speaker 1: So if you can come home and Get call three patients back and then you can still eat at a decent time and it's and you feel good about that, then That's great.
• 12:38
  Speaker 1: So this, this indirect support is is pretty important actually, and I feel like This is an area where Sometimes and we'll talk about moving rungs here But it's this is might be a conversation where if somebody is sort of in that no support category, meaning they're kind of like indifferent about whether or not you do this, then that can be and a real easy way to Increase their level by having like a really direct conversation.
• 13:07
  Speaker 1: Hey, i need you to help me do blank.
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: I think that we can work together to do x, y or z and then go.
• 13:15
  Speaker 2: Absolutely, and we're gonna talk about how to move people up the rungs of this ladder as we get going here.
• 13:19
  Speaker 2: The next rung is really one-time, occasional direct support, and really good examples of this are somebody coming in and helping you put together furniture for the clinic or painting the walls, or helping you set up your website, or You know those one-time big things where you can go to and this is often times significant other but can be family Cool.
• 13:42
  Speaker 2: I need help with this one thing one time actually helping in the business, and so those are some really good examples if you think about that.
• 13:49
  Speaker 2: But it's not something that's gonna be a recurring thing, it's not ongoing.
• 13:53
  Speaker 1: It's like, hey, i need you for one weekend to come in and we gotta paint this darn clinic yeah, or if you have somebody in your life that is a photographer, something like that, and they're gonna take your head shots in your clinic photos and all that stuff, but they're not gonna be in the day to day With you doing all of that, are you have someone that used to be in marketing and maybe does a couple of your brand and your logo design, but then they're gonna just be.
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: that's their only You know one time directing they're gonna help you with and then they're not gonna be good for this.
• 14:26
  Speaker 1: more on this next category, which is the more ongoing direct support right.
• 14:32
  Speaker 2: Ongoing direct is kind of that top rung of whatever it is you need in the business is actually helping the business out Bookkeeping, laundry, answering phones.
• 14:42
  Speaker 2: You know, in our various rising programs i think we've had close to 10 spouses like actually quit their full time job and come on board To help build the business as they go.
• 14:53
  Speaker 2: So it can be something where you know, like Nicole and i ended up doing, where it's like it's your in it together, they're actually full time in the business.
• 15:00
  Speaker 2: Now I mean that you have to do it that way.
• 15:02
  Speaker 2: They can be part time something else.
• 15:04
  Speaker 2: They can just be really super supported.
• 15:06
  Speaker 2: We've had people who have Big full time jobs we're still running all of the bookkeeping or maybe they're being awesome and doing laundry for although we would be asking, why Still doing your own laundry at some point but that's that kind of ongoing support and that is.
• 15:21
  Speaker 2: It's really, really helpful.
• 15:22
  Speaker 2: That's like a weekly basis, a monthly basis, whatever it is.
• 15:26
  Speaker 2: They're taking things in the business off of your plate.
• 15:28
  Speaker 1: And they have a defined, clear recurring role.
• 15:33
  Speaker 1: I think that's the other thing that distinguishes that from that one time direct to the ongoing direct category is that they have like an actual recurring role, a responsibility, consequence if that doesn't get done, all of that kind of stuff.
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: And so, honestly, like that is where Jesse and i were.
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: Jesse was always in that one time direct category for a decent amount of time and then it was like he started getting interested in it and then it was like i got super busy and then it was kind of like where at this crossroads of like, okay, what are we gonna do?
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: And then Jesse was like why can't answer the phone and do your scheduling?
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: for a while plus i sucked at it so i got banned from the schedule real early on.
• 16:11
  Speaker 1: How many mistakes i was making so bad.
• 16:14
  Speaker 2: it was like Why is somebody scheduled for eleven pm on a sunday night?
• 16:20
  Speaker 2: it wasn't that it was like where were they supposed to be?
• 16:23
  Speaker 2: and then she's like what a post it note somewhere with it, and so now we're scouring the office for this one post that probably didn't exist, to be honest, trying to find out like why so and so what was a trying to book?
• 16:37
  Speaker 1: There was a couple times the start of the book camels back is when we had like for two times in a row patients come show up at the same time.
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: And then also i was scheduling people kinds on saturdays and i was like i'll just come in, i know that you need it okay, boundaries were nowhere to be found right.
• 16:55
  Speaker 2: So we were missing two things competence and boundaries, and when you have neither of those, it's not a good situation.
• 17:02
  Speaker 2: So why do we talk about these?
• 17:04
  Speaker 2: because it might seem like, okay, great, why can i identify where my partner is, where my family is, like fantastic, i can, but what does that actually do?
• 17:11
  Speaker 2: I think there's three reasons that we think this is really important.
• 17:14
  Speaker 2: One is just so that you can have some understanding and give yourself some grace.
• 17:19
  Speaker 2: Escape from that comparison.
• 17:21
  Speaker 2: I just trapped by the quote with a comparison, is the thief of joy That realize that other people are running their own race and they might have more support.
• 17:29
  Speaker 2: You might have more support.
• 17:30
  Speaker 2: Maybe it's a call for some humility, like we certainly feel it that way it's.
• 17:34
  Speaker 2: It's not a fair comparison to compare the colon i who were doing this both crazy long full, i mean sixty, seventy hours a week without kids Doing it together.
• 17:46
  Speaker 1: That's a ton of work that we're putting in.
• 17:48
  Speaker 2: It's really unfair to compare us to somebody who's got two young kids and a husband who travels a ton for work.
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: Totally, and you know to on that point, like jessie, i think i think he's like looking at me i hope this is true Like we work like pretty darn well together, just inherently, i think our brains work similarly.
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: i think there's some things that we have challenges with, but For the most part there was never any like massive contentious points until we actually got busier and then we had to like redefine our roles and all that kind of stuff.
• 18:21
  Speaker 1: that's a whole other podcast for a different day.
• 18:23
  Speaker 1: but like in general, i mean we have The screen sense like compliment each other right there's a lot of different things.
• 18:28
  Speaker 2: it would not be good if i was a physical therapist, because you would think i was an idiot, correct and that is actually funny story.
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna tell it real quick.
• 18:36
  Speaker 1: I dated A couple of different physical therapist over my dating wait a couple.
• 18:42
  Speaker 1: I only remember what time, but for one that you knew of And seriously you guys it was he was already a PT and I was still in PT school And it was the absolute worst.
• 18:54
  Speaker 1: He would like come home and be like talking to me about this patient And I was like, oh my gosh, i think you're a bad PT.
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: I think you're a bad PT.
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: I was like I can't do this, i cannot do this.
• 19:04
  Speaker 1: He was talking about joint lobing a shoulder one time.
• 19:06
  Speaker 1: I'm like I think that's the wrong direction.
• 19:08
  Speaker 1: I think you're trying to increase the anterior capsule.
• 19:12
  Speaker 2: I think you just dislocated someone's shoulder.
• 19:13
  Speaker 1: I was like I think that's wrong, I think that's not right, You know, and even then I was a student, I was a student.
• 19:19
  Speaker 1: I still was a neogram.
• 19:21
  Speaker 1: Once was like I don't think you should be doing that, Like this is bad.
• 19:23
  Speaker 1: And then he was like Oh no, it's different.
• 19:26
  Speaker 1: Blah, blah, blah And I was like OK, I got to go, We're done.
• 19:30
  Speaker 1: It was so bad.
• 19:31
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 19:32
  Speaker 2: So would not have been a good situation if our spheres overlapped more than they do.
• 19:38
  Speaker 2: So that's the first thing is we want you to just really understand which of those you're in that negative support, no support, indirect support, one time direct support and that ongoing direct support.
• 19:49
  Speaker 2: Where are you on that?
• 19:50
  Speaker 2: and give yourself some grace, you're not growing as quickly as you want Be thinking about that.
• 19:54
  Speaker 2: Secondly is thinking about can you move the people in your life up that ladder a little bit?
• 20:00
  Speaker 2: If you have somebody who is, like Nicole was saying, is not really supported, is there a way for them to provide some indirect support?
• 20:07
  Speaker 2: Can you ask again very directly is it possible for you to take the kids on this certain day?
• 20:13
  Speaker 2: Can you cook dinner on, at least on these couple of nights, so I know that I can stay a little bit later at the office?
• 20:19
  Speaker 1: If you have somebody that's in that negative support category, can you just get them to shut the fuck up and not be negative, like go to therapy, do something, because, honestly, like, if you have made the decision like this is what you're going to do for the relationship, regardless of who it is, if it's a partner, if it's a spouse, if it's a family member like at that point you're just going to need them to shut the fuck up at some point.
• 20:43
  Speaker 2: And sometimes time limits can be good on that.
• 20:45
  Speaker 2: We've seen that with a couple of people in our group that had those where, hey, i'm doing this thing, i need you to shut the fuck up for six months.
• 20:52
  Speaker 2: Right, and then we'll evaluate where is this thing And if it totally bombs, then what's the worst thing that happened?
• 20:58
  Speaker 2: I wasted six months and so what?
• 21:01
  Speaker 2: I go back to that hospital job that I'm hating right now, and but that's fine.
• 21:05
  Speaker 2: But I need.
• 21:05
  Speaker 2: I need this period of time for you to shut the fuck up.
• 21:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 21:08
  Speaker 1: So that's how you can turn a negative support into just like no support.
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: We're just going to kind of, you know, we're not going to, it's like that fight club thing, we're not going to talk about it, we're just going to go along our lives and then you're not going to comment And I'm not going to tell you anything, and then you're just, you're going to go into that no support category where you're just not saying anything negative and you are still.
• 21:26
  Speaker 1: You know, we're still together.
• 21:28
  Speaker 2: Right, although I don't think that was the point of fight club, but that's a whole number Wrong, wrong.
• 21:32
  Speaker 2: Movie reference All handle the movie references part of the podcast.
• 21:36
  Speaker 1: They're really bad at that.
• 21:38
  Speaker 2: And can you move somebody from like a one time direct to ongoing direct?
• 21:41
  Speaker 2: Is there something that they can help take off your plate in the business?
• 21:44
  Speaker 2: If they have a background in marketing, is there something that they can do for you?
• 21:48
  Speaker 2: ongoing is if they have a head for numbers, can they handle your bookkeeping?
• 21:52
  Speaker 2: Are there things where you can kind of bring them more into the business?
• 21:55
  Speaker 2: And the other thing to say about this, nicole and I know you believe this wholeheartedly actions speak louder than words when it comes to this.
• 22:01
  Speaker 2: So all the nice things and good intentions, but are they really stepping up and doing that?
• 22:06
  Speaker 2: And you'll have to make that determination for yourself.
• 22:08
  Speaker 1: Yes, action speaks louder than words And you have to have the conversations and see if we can, if there's room, to move people up the ladder.
• 22:16
  Speaker 1: But at the end of the day, believe people when they tell you things, and what if they show you that they're really not that interested?
• 22:23
  Speaker 1: you can't change somebody that much.
• 22:25
  Speaker 1: So you can have a good conversation, but no one's going to go from negative support to full on ongoing direct support, especially not in a timeframe that's going to be helpful to you, maybe over the course of years, once they see, like, how successful you can be and how this can be life changing for you and your family.
• 22:43
  Speaker 2: And they switched it up in their mind to pretend that they were really supportive at the beginning.
• 22:46
  Speaker 2: Supporting from the beginning, right?
• 22:47
  Speaker 2: That's really.
• 22:48
  Speaker 2: What has to happen is for them to revise history in their own minds, to be like remember, nicole, when I told you you should definitely start your business.
• 22:55
  Speaker 1: Revisionist history at its finest there.
• 22:56
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 22:57
  Speaker 1: But just you know, believe people.
• 22:59
  Speaker 1: actions speak louder than words, And it's okay.
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: if you have somebody that isn't going to be a part of your business, That's okay.
• 23:08
  Speaker 1: We just need you to refer back to number one, which is just understand that that's what's going on and give yourself grace and don't use that as a comparison thing.
• 23:18
  Speaker 2: And the third action item from here is once you understand and once you made the decision on can you move somebody up the ladder, can you get more support, or is that trying to get more blood from a stone?
• 23:28
  Speaker 2: It's just not going to happen.
• 23:29
  Speaker 2: Then what other actions can you take to get the support that you need?
• 23:34
  Speaker 2: and i think that's the really the crux of what we're talking about here is be able to look at this with a realistic focus And then say cool, i'm not getting this kind of support, i need to go out and get that myself.
• 23:45
  Speaker 2: I need to go out and pay for that, and a lot of times that's where That is happening.
• 23:49
  Speaker 2: So if you got someone who is really negative about your business, you might be more important for you to get into some kind of group Where you're surrounded by people who are supportive of that, whether it's locally or a group like the accelerator or whatever it is, even online facebook groups.
• 24:05
  Speaker 1: Surround yourself with some more positive stuff to counteract that negativity yeah, or if you have somebody, let's say you have an accountant for a partner.
• 24:14
  Speaker 1: They might not want to blend their job with your business and that's totally fine too, but guess what?
• 24:21
  Speaker 1: you're gonna have to pay for an accountant, even though your person could do it.
• 24:28
  Speaker 1: and sometimes that's just a mental shift, and but if you're gonna stay together and whatever that you need to just do it And not worry about it, just move on right.
• 24:37
  Speaker 1: then that that is something to think about is sometimes the people that can support you maybe don't want to or just not gonna work for your personality or whatever it is.
• 24:49
  Speaker 2: Right and give me some other examples.
• 24:51
  Speaker 2: Of course, we got through this.
• 24:52
  Speaker 2: If you feel like you need more indirect support and you're not getting that, that is something that you can often times hire that out.
• 24:58
  Speaker 2: So this doesn't always have to be within the business, but that's something like cool.
• 25:02
  Speaker 2: Could you get childcare more often?
• 25:04
  Speaker 2: Could you, instead of having a cook dinner, go with a home chef or whatever that is that's already pre made?
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: Ask a friend can I drop my kids off?
• 25:13
  Speaker 1: I need a block of time because I think the biggest, one of the biggest challenges and we're finding this out now, even with clay like It's helpful to have a block of time that's uninterrupted for to really get some stuff done.
• 25:25
  Speaker 1: And so can you ask a friend can I drop my kids off At your house on a Saturday and use that time?
• 25:32
  Speaker 1: yeah, that would maybe be a family day, but for this month I really need these Saturdays to do that, and then we're gonna flip it and the next month I can watch your kids or whatever.
• 25:42
  Speaker 1: So ask people specifically what you need for that.
• 25:46
  Speaker 1: Indirect support category.
• 25:48
  Speaker 2: And then some of these other months, and might mean that you have to hire front desk earlier than you would otherwise.
• 25:52
  Speaker 2: Right and those.
• 25:54
  Speaker 2: One of the benefits and drawbacks, frankly, of public sanity is we were able to, and the drawback was is that we did.
• 26:01
  Speaker 2: We waited too long to hire and too long to invest in our front desk admin positions.
• 26:06
  Speaker 2: We could do that because I was around to answer the phone and that allowed us to grow.
• 26:11
  Speaker 2: It allowed us to be able to do some of the things as quickly as we did.
• 26:14
  Speaker 2: But if you don't have that, yeah, you're gonna need to hire that earlier.
• 26:19
  Speaker 2: And so if you're not getting that kind of ongoing direct help, that might be hiring stuff out earlier in the business and you might have otherwise done, but it's gonna be really critical to your growth.
• 26:29
  Speaker 1: Totally so.
• 26:30
  Speaker 1: We hope that this has been helpful for you.
• 26:32
  Speaker 1: I know that this can be sometimes a touchy subject with folks is just relationships in general, whether that's family members, siblings, spouses, partners, whatever But I think it's a really important thing that's not talked about a ton in the business growth world and it really is something that is that we've noticed to be a really big factor in the trajectory of your growth.
• 26:58
  Speaker 2: Hopefully this gives you a new framework to think about this.
• 27:01
  Speaker 2: If you want to write us in and let us know if you've had challenges around this, you are certainly not alone, but hopefully that gives you the ability to kind of understand where you are, move your people up the ladder if possible, to get more support from them And then, if not, some ideas for how to replace that support with either friends, other family members or by getting paid services.
• 27:22
  Speaker 2: So hopefully this gives you guys a framework for that.
• 27:26
  Speaker 2: And this is again.
• 27:27
  Speaker 2: I think you're totally right.
• 27:29
  Speaker 2: This is something that we need to be talking about a little bit more because it plays a huge role in your business.
• 27:33
  Speaker 2: So if you guys have stories about this, if you guys have overcome negative support or, alternatively, had a partner who's been incredibly support, please reach out, let us know.
• 27:43
  Speaker 2: We always want to keep this conversation going And let's continue to rise.