Latest / The Confident Entrepreneur With Jennifer Ann Johnson / The Power of Mentorship with Sara Mueller
Transcript
- 0:37Jennifer Johnson: Our guest today is Sara Mueller, and she is a Harvard-trained emotional intelligence expert, an international award-winning success coach and author of the Balanced Life Blueprint.
- 0:49Jennifer Johnson: Welcome, thank you so much.
- 0:51Jennifer Johnson: I'm so excited to be here again.
- 0:52Jennifer Johnson: We were just talking before we went on air.
- 0:55Jennifer Johnson: You've done a lot.
- 0:56Jennifer Johnson: You've worked with the NFL Combine, which you explained to me is like the mental health area that they have to go through to get into the NFL, yes, and behavioral health centers and Fortune Global 500 executives.
- 1:10Jennifer Johnson: You have done a lot.
- 1:12Sara Mueller: I know it's been a great career.
- 1:13Sara Mueller: I'm excited about that.
- 1:14Sara Mueller: It's pretty awesome and you have your book, the Balanced Life Blueprint that's out, yes, yes, officially on February 18th, but I do have some pre-order copies that are rocking and rolling, just fabulous.
- 1:25Jennifer Johnson: It's so wonderful.
- 1:26Jennifer Johnson: Today we're talking about mentors and paid, unpaid and everything in between.
- 1:33Jennifer Johnson: Right, mentors are so important.
- 1:36Jennifer Johnson: In my life I had mentors before I really even knew what a mentor was.
- 1:41Jennifer Johnson: They were you know they were a confidant, they were a teacher, they were many different walks of life and never really knew what that was, never really understood it until, you know, I started owning my own company and then I was looked to by other people to kind of mentor them, and mentors are pretty powerful, absolutely.
- 2:03Jennifer Johnson: So let's talk about the benefits of having a mentor in your business specifically, okay, and we can talk about in life too, yes, but I just it's important.
- 2:17Sara Mueller: Yeah, so I think that when I think about mentors, it's important.
- 2:23Sara Mueller: Yeah, so I think that when I think about mentors, I think of them as like a time machine and this could be in your business or in your personal life, for whatever it is that you're wanting to excel at Because we get to really take the expertise and the wisdom and the learned experience from the mentor and use that so that we don't have to spend as much time and energy and heartache and tears and money to get to the same result that they have.
- 2:46Sara Mueller: And so it really is like a time machine that helps us to have success in a quicker way, which I don't know about you, but I like fast results.
- 2:53Sara Mueller: I have so much that I want to accomplish in this lifetime that I want to keep moving forward.
- 2:58Jennifer Johnson: I love that analogy because it is like a time machine.
- 3:02Jennifer Johnson: It's like I'm back to the future.
- 3:04Sara Mueller: Yes, yes yes, yes, and so I think the other thing that's really great about mentorship is that we can get mentored in whatever area we want to grow in.
- 3:15Sara Mueller: So it really starts with us understanding, well, what's the biggest opportunity for my business, what specifically does it look like?
- 3:22Sara Mueller: And then finding the correct mentor or coach that can help us to achieve that result that we're looking to get.
- 3:28Jennifer Johnson: I love that because you're right, you can have one for the financial area, because not one person is going to hit all those buckets.
- 3:38Jennifer Johnson: Absolutely, so you could do financial, you could do marketing, you can have all of these people, and I call it filling my proverbial bench.
- 3:45Jennifer Johnson: I like that Because I need people that are not necessarily in my business every day.
- 3:52Jennifer Johnson: It's like my board of directors right, I like that, but they don't work for me.
- 3:56Jennifer Johnson: They're literally my mentor, because I don't know everything and not any one person is going to know everything, and it's like getting a second opinion at the doctor.
- 4:04Jennifer Johnson: Absolutely.
- 4:06Sara Mueller: Right.
- 4:07Jennifer Johnson: You have other people to bounce it off of.
- 4:10Sara Mueller: To make sure that you're trying to make the most informed decision that you can Absolutely, and getting that outside perspective is so valuable, especially with someone who has already been there and done that.
- 4:19Sara Mueller: And so, same as you, I've had a lot of different mentors and coaches in my life.
- 4:23Sara Mueller: I had a sort of a business launching coach, I've had a leadership coach, I've had a marketing coach Right now I'm working with book and promotion coaching and so when I've identified that biggest opportunity for my business, that's when I've then sought out that mentorship relationship, whatever that might be, whether it's someone that agrees to come on and be your mentor as a friend, or that is someone that you pay, which would be more like a coaching type relationship.
- 4:51Jennifer Johnson: Either way, it definitely impacts you with growing your business.
- 4:56Jennifer Johnson: So, in your opinion, how can a mentor help you grow your business or succeed in your business?
- 5:05Sara Mueller: So I think that they help you to see the outcome that you want to get to and to understand which steps to get there and to guide you through and to also hold you accountable, because a lot of us have great intentions and if there's not someone or something that's holding us accountable, we can lose track, we can fall off of the direction that we're going, and so the mentorship role holds you accountable and gives you that insight, and that sort of third mentorship role holds you accountable and gives you that insight and that sort of third-party perspective that you and I talked about.
- 5:38Sara Mueller: I think it's really important when we're picking a mentor.
- 5:41Sara Mueller: We want to work with someone or have a relationship with someone that we, of course, connect with, but we also want to make sure that they have achieved what we want to achieve Exactly.
- 5:51Jennifer Johnson: Yes, because there's a lot of people out there.
- 5:54Sara Mueller: There's people who focus on studying or the academics, and there's a lot of coaches and mentors out there that are offering services, and it can get a little overwhelming to figure out which one you want to work with or you want to pursue.
- 6:06Sara Mueller: And so, okay, who has actually done the thing that I want to do, whether it's emotional intelligence or starting a business or having a successful marketing campaign?
- 6:15Sara Mueller: Who has actually done that?
- 6:16Sara Mueller: And that's the person that I want to work with so I can gain all of their wisdom and their golden nuggets that they're willing to share.
- 6:22Jennifer Johnson: And that makes complete sense, because you don't.
- 6:25Jennifer Johnson: Anybody can look good on paper, right, but what did you actually do?
- 6:29Jennifer Johnson: And I love the fact that you made a comment about education so somebody could be a professor of a certain area, but maybe they'd not actually ever owned their own business Two completely separate things.
- 6:41Sara Mueller: Yes, and so I'm not saying not to seek out the education or read those books.
- 6:45Sara Mueller: There's definitely a lot of information in theory, but when you're looking at a specific mentorship or coaching type role, you want someone that has been there done that to help you get to that same result.
- 6:57Jennifer Johnson: Right, and this kind of goes into my key qualities that we should be looking for in a mentor.
- 6:59Jennifer Johnson: Number one they should have done what you want to do, yes, right, not where you're at right now, but where you want to go.
- 7:03Jennifer Johnson: Yes, what else would you look for in a good mentor?
- 7:06Sara Mueller: Well, and I think, to add on to that piece as well, they just need to be one step ahead of you, right as well.
- 7:17Sara Mueller: You know they don't need to.
- 7:18Sara Mueller: They just need to be one step ahead of you, right?
- 7:19Sara Mueller: They don't need to be 10%.
- 7:20Sara Mueller: And sometimes, when they are, you know, let's say, I want to grow my business to, you know, a multi, six figure business, but I only have, you know, $10,000 in revenue.
- 7:24Sara Mueller: You know, my business is just starting out.
- 7:26Sara Mueller: That might be a big leap for me.
- 7:27Sara Mueller: Or to say, oh, I want to, I'm going to work with a mentor that's going to help me get to a seven-figure business.
- 7:31Sara Mueller: That's a big leap.
- 7:32Sara Mueller: But if I work with someone, that's maybe just one or two steps ahead of me.
- 7:36Sara Mueller: It's a bit closer.
- 7:37Sara Mueller: It helps me to understand okay, I could probably get to a six-figure business from where I'm at now.
- 7:41Sara Mueller: So we want to have them ahead of us, but it doesn't need to be a huge gap, because if there is a huge gap, then your mind starts going but I'm not there.
- 7:52Jennifer Johnson: How will I ever get there?
- 7:54Sara Mueller: Right, Like we trick ourselves, and you might be able to work with that person once you're ready for that.
- 8:00Sara Mueller: But we really want to think about what is the thing that I need to accomplish right now.
- 8:03Sara Mueller: Let me work on that first, and there's always the time for further mentors.
- 8:06Sara Mueller: I think, too, that there's the willingness.
- 8:09Sara Mueller: If we look at someone who is I'm very grateful that I get to work with a lot of senior leaders and they are at the end of their career and they are recognizing that they have gotten to the success in their career because other people have lifted them up, they put them on their shoulders and push them up, and a lot of these leaders are wanting to leave a legacy and are wanting to pay back all of the great wisdom and experience that they got from those who mentored them.
- 8:35Sara Mueller: And so you really need to find someone who's willing to have that type of relationship with you, that's willing to invest the time, and I think there also needs to be clear identification of what is expected of that mentoring relationship, especially if it's not like a paid coach.
- 8:52Sara Mueller: If you're working with a coach that you're paying to help you achieve something, that's very clear.
- 8:56Sara Mueller: But if you're finding a mentor, someone who's willing to invest their time in you because they want to give back.
- 9:00Sara Mueller: Like I was just speaking about, it's best to set sort of clear expectations of what this relationship will look like for both parties, so that you're both happy and fulfilled with it.
- 9:09Sara Mueller: That makes complete sense.
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- 9:40Jennifer Johnson: Welcome back, friends.
- 9:42Jennifer Johnson: We're in studio with Sara Mueller and we're talking about the importance of a mentor in your business and really in life.
- 9:49Jennifer Johnson: I know I have had several throughout my life, not even really knowing that that's what they were at the time and in hindsight going, wow, they changed my life.
- 9:56Jennifer Johnson: Not even really knowing that that's what they were at the time and in hindsight going, wow, they changed my life.
- 9:58Jennifer Johnson: I mean, I can remember this high school teacher who, to this day, I still stay in contact with and I've graduated 30 some years ago and she has no idea what an impact she left in my life and my first job, my first big girl job.
- 10:18Jennifer Johnson: The owner of that company was someone who really inspired me to start my business, and they probably didn't even know that.
- 10:30Sara Mueller: Well and I think that's such a great thing for us to touch upon here is that we don't always recognize the influence that we're having in other people.
- 10:38Sara Mueller: We're definitely impacting others, and so you can be a mentor to someone else.
- 10:43Sara Mueller: The way that you live, the way that you act, the way that you work.
- 10:47Sara Mueller: And giving that belief in someone and that positive comment.
- 10:52Sara Mueller: I remember one of my teachers from middle school who basically told my parents that Sara is going to be able to accomplish whatever she sets her mind to.
- 11:00Sara Mueller: And I still hear that and that gives me the motivation to keep doing the work that I do.
- 11:06Jennifer Johnson: And you know I mean we have to be careful because on the flip side we've got the negative ones too right To not put energy into those and, to, you know, really allow the ones that build us up to really give us that energy.
- 11:20Sara Mueller: Yes, and it's funny because I am more of a person that's motivated by positivity.
- 11:26Sara Mueller: So, remembering that middle school, teacher that I just mentioned, but I've had other people speak about.
- 11:31Sara Mueller: This isn't a specific mentorship relationship, but those people who have said those sort of negative comments, you know, like oh, you'll never amount to anything.
- 11:39Sara Mueller: Or you know, don't even try to write a book because no one's going to read.
- 11:42Sara Mueller: You know that's pretty extreme, but I've heard of people hearing comments like that from their teachers, specifically in elementary, middle, high school, and they sort of use those people as fuel to accomplish what they want and in a way be like, hey, I can do this, and almost like told you so, and so it's just kind of understanding how we're motivated.
- 12:02Sara Mueller: Again, for me it's more positive motivation, but sometimes if that's enough to spark the light underneath us so that we can accomplish what we want, then amazing.
- 12:12Jennifer Johnson: I'm actually tearing up a little bit because you struck a chord with me Back in the day.
- 12:18Jennifer Johnson: Growing up.
- 12:19Jennifer Johnson: I was the ugly duckling glasses, crooked teeth, funky hair, everything.
- 12:30Jennifer Johnson: And I just remember not the people saying that I could never do something, but kind of being an outcast, right, Kind of being an outcast, and I draw on that every so often.
- 12:38Jennifer Johnson: Every so often, whatever I don't know why, but it comes up and I'm like kind of giving the middle finger to it and saying, screw you, no, I am becoming who I am and I'm pushing through it and I use that to fuel me.
- 12:58Jennifer Johnson: But on the flip side, I also use that positive.
- 13:02Jennifer Johnson: So I think people can use both, just depending upon what it is.
- 13:06Jennifer Johnson: And just growing up as that outcast made me really, really push to be and do what I'm doing today.
- 13:14Jennifer Johnson: So you struck a chord with me, I mean.
- 13:18Sara Mueller: And I love We've got to find as business owners, we've got to find that fire from wherever we can get it.
- 13:22Jennifer Johnson: It's sometimes a long and lonely road it is.
- 13:25Sara Mueller: So, however, we can support ourselves to keep moving forward.
- 13:28Sara Mueller: And then the one thing I want to add to that is that mentor that you mentioned might not even recognize the impact that he or she had on you.
- 13:35Sara Mueller: What a great thing for you to send him or her a note or a message and let them know the impact.
- 13:40Sara Mueller: I think that would be really.
- 13:41Jennifer Johnson: You know an interesting note I actually carry around with me in my handbag a rock.
- 13:48Jennifer Johnson: It's a simple rock.
- 13:52Jennifer Johnson: Someone had given that to me and said remember the ripple effect?
- 13:59Jennifer Johnson: Very cool.
- 13:59Jennifer Johnson: Right, you throw a rock into a pond and how the water ripples out.
- 14:06Jennifer Johnson: Well, that's what mentors do, and they don't even know they're doing it.
- 14:12Sara Mueller: So for sure they're expanding their impact and their influence.
- 14:16Jennifer Johnson: So for sure they're expanding their impact and their influence.
- 14:18Jennifer Johnson: You know and this leads me to my last question but our thought is how do we maintain a successful mentoring relationship with someone?
- 14:30Sara Mueller: I like to be really respectful of my mentor's time, and so this is a mentor relationship that's not like a paid coach, for example and understand that they are really giving me something of value.
- 14:43Sara Mueller: They are very busy, they have a lot going on, and so the way that I feel like is best to maintain that is to really think about what you want to get out of your communication with them.
- 14:54Sara Mueller: So I've found that, as I'm, I might have a question as I'm drafting that communication, I'm drafting that email to them.
- 15:02Sara Mueller: It's forcing me to get very, very clear on what specifically I want to ask.
- 15:06Sara Mueller: Sometimes, just in getting really clear on what I want to ask that person so that I can really be respectful of their time, I gain enough clarity that I know which way to move forward.
- 15:16Sara Mueller: So I have a mentor that I might not even be in communication with, but I'm sort of thinking, well, how would this person respond to me?
- 15:22Sara Mueller: And as I'm getting clear on my question, I'm getting a sense as to what that answer is.
- 15:27Sara Mueller: And so just understanding that, being respectful, being prepared, knowing what you want to ask for, if you only have five minutes, what's the one question or maybe three that you would ask and then if there's a way to give back, of course being appreciative, but what can you do for them?
- 15:44Sara Mueller: How can you give back to them?
- 15:45Sara Mueller: They're probably getting enough from giving back as they're wanting to leaving a legacy, but I just love being able to kind of keep paying it back and forth.
- 15:54Jennifer Johnson: I love it.
- 15:55Jennifer Johnson: I love it.
- 15:56Jennifer Johnson: I loved our conversation today Me too.
- 15:58Jennifer Johnson: Very impactful, very impactful.
- 16:01Jennifer Johnson: If our listeners want to get in touch with you or they want to get a copy of your book, yes, yes, how do we get ahold of you?
- 16:08Sara Mueller: So the best way to get in touch with me and get a copy of my book is at bookforbalancecom.
- 16:15Sara Mueller: So it's bookforbalancecom.
- 16:17Sara Mueller: The Balanced Life Blueprint is there with a bunch of free resources and a workbook to help others implement it, and look forward to seeing people there.
- 16:26Sara Mueller: Fabulous.
- 16:27Sara Mueller: Thank you so much.
- 16:28Sara Mueller: You are so welcome.