Latest / MIDDLE GROUND - Real Conversations on Faith, Identity & Becoming — Through Brynne's LDS Lens of Curiosity, Love and Doubt / Why Your Life Is a Result of Your Thoughts Not Your Circumstances - Part 1/4
Transcript
- Brynne Erickson (01:04) Today I'm going to teach you a tool that is going to empower how you live your life. All starting with your thoughts. It's called the Thought Model, and it was developed by Brooke Castillo of the Life Coach School. And my coach, Jodie Moore, teaches it too. And it has been super foundational to my own growth. And it's totally going to change yours as well. So just a heads up, this is a four-part series, and today is just the overview. So let's get into it. the model has five components. They start with circumstances, which lead to thoughts, which lead to feelings, which lead to actions, and then create your result. and they work in a specific sequence that once you understand it, it explains almost everything about the life you are living right now. So here it is in its simplest form. So circumstances are the neutral facts around what happens in life, in your life, in the people around you's lives. Thoughts are what your brain makes of those facts. So the words in your head. Feelings are what those thoughts generate in your body. Actions are what you do from that feeling state. And results are what those actions create in your life. So that's it. Five steps. But the implications are enormous because if this model is true, and the science says it is, then your life is not primarily shaped by what happens to you. It's shaped by what you think about what happens to you. Mind blowing, isn't it? I wanna ground this in history for a second Because I think it makes it more credible and more interesting. So this is not something Brooke Castillo invented from scratch. This idea goes back thousands of years ago. So a Stoic philosopher named Epictetus, who was born a slave in ancient Rome around 50 AD, he wrote, Men are disturbed not by the things which happen, but by the opinions about the things. And that is the thought model in one sentence, written 2,000 years ago. Another version, Marcus Aurelius, who was a Roman emperor and Stoic philosopher, wrote in his meditations You have power over your mind. Not outside events. Realize this and you will find strength. Same idea, totally different century. In the nineteen fifties and sixties, psychiatrist Aaron Beck and psychologist Albert Ellis. independently developed what became cognitive behavioral therapy, also known as CBT, which is now one of the most well researched and widely practiced forms of therapy in the world. The core premise of CBT is that our thoughts, not our circumstances, drive our emotional responses and our behavior. Beck called them automatic thoughts. And Ellis called them irrational beliefs. The thought model just calls them thoughts. It's all the same concept, just different language. So, what Brooke Castillo did was take these well-established ideas and package them into an awesome little tool that anyone can use. And that is genuinely so valuable because this model has changed my life and I know it can change yours too. So here's what most of us do: something happens, someone says something. Plan falls through, we step on the scale, and we immediately feel a certain way about it. And then we act from that feeling. And we assume that the thing that happened caused the feeling. That's just how it works, right? Except it doesn't. That's not how it works. Between the circumstance and the feeling, there is always a thought. We're just not aware of it. Your brain interprets the event, assigns meaning to it, makes a judgment, and then tells a story. And that story generates the feeling, not the event or what actually happened in itself. So here's a simple example. Two people receive the same critical piece of feedback from their boss. One person thinks they're right. I need to do better. They feel motivated, they act, they improve, and then the other thinks I'm terrible at this job. They feel shame, they avoid, they underperform. Same circumstance, yet completely different thoughts, feelings, action, and results. This is the model in real life. And over the next three episodes, we're going to go deep on each piece. We'll talk about what a true circumstance actually is. versus what your brain adds to it. We're also going to talk about where feelings live in your body and what is actually happening physiologically when an emotion fires. And then lastly we're going to talk about how your actions and results are creating a feedback loop that either confirms your existing beliefs or challenges them. But for today I want you to just sit with the big idea. That your thoughts are not facts. Your feelings are not caused by your circumstances. And the life you are living right now, to a significant degree, is a result of the thoughts you have been thinking. And that is not a guilt trip. That is the most empowering thing that I know. Because if your thoughts created this, your thoughts can create something different. So here's your assignment for this week. When you notice a strong feeling like frustration, anxiety, resentment, overwhelm, whatever it is, just pause and ask yourself, what am I thinking right now? Not what happened. What am I thinking about what happened? You don't have to change it yet. Just identify it and get curious about it, and that's the whole assignment. You're gonna be amazed at what you find. And next episode we go deep on circumstances and thoughts. And it's going to make you look at your life completely differently. I can't wait. I'll see you there. Brynne Erickson (07:43) Hey, really quick, whether your faith is shifting or you've already done a lot of that work, I built something for you. It's called Faith in Process and is a private online community for Latter-day Saints who want to explore and expand their beliefs through real open-minded conversations about gospel topics and principles. Think that like Facebook and Sunday school had a baby, but you never have to see anyone in person. Drop in whenever works for you, leave a thought, read what others are sitting with. No calls, no meetups, just good conversation. Twelve dollars a month at www.brynneerickson.com. Click join Faith and Process for more information and I hope to see you there.