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FILM REAL | The Worst Movies of 2024 · The Recess Bell

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  Speaker 1: This production is brought to you by the Recess Bell.
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  Speaker 1: Hey everybody, my name is Justin Greenberg, and this is
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  Speaker 1: the film reel right here on the Recess Bell Network,
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  Speaker 1: and we are finally getting to it the worst of
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  Speaker 1: the Worst. Twenty twenty four was a very interesting year
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  Speaker 1: at the box office, and while there were a lot
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  Speaker 1: of fantastic movies, like we went over on a previous episode,
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  Speaker 1: there was also a lot of stinkers. And that's what
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  Speaker 1: we're gonna get to right now. Before I get to
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  Speaker 1: my top five worst movies of the year, I do
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  Speaker 1: have some honorable mentions, or maybe in this case, dishonorable mentions.
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  Speaker 1: Argyle was a film that was actually insulting. I was
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  Speaker 1: actually insulted while watching the movie. And what sucked is
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  Speaker 1: it had a really good cast, in fact, that has
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  Speaker 1: one of my favorite actors of all time, Sam Rockwell
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  Speaker 1: in it. I think the thing that pissed me off
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  Speaker 1: the most about this movie was that they used a
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  Speaker 1: Beatles song. And I love the Beatles are my favorite band,
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  Speaker 1: but they took the worst possible Beatles song ever. In fact,
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  Speaker 1: it wasn't even an officially released Beatles song. John Lennon
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  Speaker 1: made a demo. He obviously got killed by a gun.
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  Speaker 1: That's important. And the remaining Beatles that are alive now,
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  Speaker 1: Paul and Ringo, they decided we're gonna take that demo.
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  Speaker 1: We're gonna add some George Harrison guitar that we have
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  Speaker 1: from a previous session thirty years ago, and we're gonna
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  Speaker 1: make a song. We don't know if John would have
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  Speaker 1: wanted the song to be released. Maybe it was a
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  Speaker 1: demo for a reason, but we're gonna release it. I
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  Speaker 1: did not like the song. I thought it was actually
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  Speaker 1: not a good song at all. And they keep on
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  Speaker 1: bringing up this song during the movie. In fact, there
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  Speaker 1: was two characters their song. It was their song. I'm
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  Speaker 1: like your song is an unreleased Beatles track. They say, oh,
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  Speaker 1: this is the song that we would listen to when
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  Speaker 1: we were in love. When does this movie take place?
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  Speaker 1: Were you listening to the demo track? Because how is
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  Speaker 1: this your song? The song was just really Now, if
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  Speaker 1: they picked like hey, Jude, or let it Be or
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  Speaker 1: something that you know has been released, maybe it would
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  Speaker 1: have made sense. But that pissed me off. But I
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  Speaker 1: brought up guns, and you know John Lennon dying from
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  Speaker 1: a gun. This movie glorifies guns, and I'm all for that.
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  Speaker 1: I love movies with violence and guns. But John Lennon
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  Speaker 1: was killed by a gun, and they make guns so
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  Speaker 1: cool in this movie. They have you know, slow motion shots,
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  Speaker 1: and they make vibrant colors appear when the guns fire,
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  Speaker 1: and I'm just thinking, why are we doing this? It
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  Speaker 1: was a very bold strategy to have that Beatles song there.
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  Speaker 1: That's one of the many reasons as to why I
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  Speaker 1: hated the movie, Argyle. Biopics are something I'm really not
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  Speaker 1: a fan of, particularly musical bio picks. Usually they're nothing great,
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  Speaker 1: and it's hard to, you know, get an entire person's
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  Speaker 1: career in a two hour movie. That's why it's always better,
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  Speaker 1: I think when they focus on a singular moment. I
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  Speaker 1: really liked the Bob Dylan biopick from later on in
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  Speaker 1: the year, But at the beginning of the year we
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  Speaker 1: had Bob Marley One Love, which to me was something
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  Speaker 1: that I could have seen be released on VH one
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  Speaker 1: back in the day. It felt very much this is
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  Speaker 1: a made for television movie. Some other weird musical choices
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  Speaker 1: being made in this movie, and that actually that pisses
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  Speaker 1: me off because my dream job if somebody say, what
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  Speaker 1: would be your dream job justin it would be to
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  Speaker 1: pick music that is played in movies. I think that's
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  Speaker 1: such an important part of the movie, and I have
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  Speaker 1: lists of songs that I would want to be played
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  Speaker 1: during a movie. So just to hear poorly picked musical
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  Speaker 1: choices in a musical bio pick was very infuriating. Driveaway
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  Speaker 1: Dolls was a very disappointing movie, and especially because I
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  Speaker 1: like the cast and I like the director. Is done
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  Speaker 1: by one of the Cohen brothers, Margaret Qualey. I believe
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  Speaker 1: that's how you pronounce her name. She was in my
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  Speaker 1: favorite movie of the year, The Substance, so she was
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  Speaker 1: great in that, and I actually hated her in this movie.
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  Speaker 1: Not the worst, but the expectations were set really high,
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  Speaker 1: so it was very disappointing. Let's get to though the
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  Speaker 1: cream of the crop. The top five worst movies of
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  Speaker 1: the year twenty twenty four. Coming in at number five
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  Speaker 1: is The Crow.
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  Speaker 2: I'm Gonna cool now. I was seen with one on one.
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  Speaker 1: I love the movie The Crow from nineteen ninety four,
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  Speaker 1: visually one of the most impressive movies of the entire
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  Speaker 1: nineteen nineties, and Brandon Lee's performance is so charismatic, and
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  Speaker 1: those are two things that are severely missing in this
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  Speaker 1: remake from twenty twenty four. Bill Skarsgard is a very
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  Speaker 1: good actor. I thought he was fantastic as Pennywise. I
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  Speaker 1: thought he was unbelievable in Nosferatu. So it's not him,
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  Speaker 1: but he so much charisma in this role. Maybe it's
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  Speaker 1: just the script sometimes that happens. Look at those Star
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  Speaker 1: Wars episode you know, prequels, the episode one and episode
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  Speaker 1: two and episode three. You have good actors in there.
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  Speaker 1: You have Samuel L. Jackson, you have Ewan McGregor, you
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  Speaker 1: have Liam Neeson who won an Oscar. Natalie Portman's given
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  Speaker 1: great performances in Black Swan. But if you just have
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  Speaker 1: the wrong script, you could take somebody that's really talented
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  Speaker 1: and really make them seem like bad actors. And that
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  Speaker 1: was the case in this movie. It was an ugly
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  Speaker 1: movie to look at. It made number five on this
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  Speaker 1: list because there was one action sequence that was fantastic.
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  Speaker 1: If it didn't have that shootout scene with the opera
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  Speaker 1: going on, it would have definitely been in the top three,
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  Speaker 1: especially because it's based on an existing property that I
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  Speaker 1: have a ton of respect for. So I would say
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  Speaker 1: skip the remake, go ahead and watch the original from
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  Speaker 1: nineteen ninety four. At number four on my list is
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  Speaker 1: something I'm not going to talk too much about because
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  Speaker 1: I actually had an entire podcast about this movie at
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  Speaker 1: the beginning of twenty twenty four, and that is Anyone
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  Speaker 1: But You, which is a movie that did technically come
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  Speaker 1: out in twenty twenty three, but I watched it in
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  Speaker 1: twenty twenty four, so I'm putting it on this list. Hey,
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  Speaker 1: hit in the wedding of my sister. Yes, I am so.
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  Speaker 1: Where's your fiance?
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  Speaker 2: Where is this him? Hey? I'm Ben.
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  Speaker 1: I was sort a hall pass on your break.
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  Speaker 2: Wow, you are a child.
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  Speaker 1: It's pretty long, plight. Do you want anything from the
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  Speaker 1: front of the boat? I'm all good on Creatine and
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  Speaker 1: Smeltic insecurity. Nothing small about me. It's just a bad comedy.
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  Speaker 1: It lacks pushing the envelope. It lacks any form of relatability.
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  Speaker 1: These actors are way too good looking, they're way too rich.
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  Speaker 1: They're living a lifestyle which an average Joe Schmo would
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  Speaker 1: not be able to relate to. But I definitely recommend
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  Speaker 1: going back into the archives and checking out the Anyone
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  Speaker 1: But You podcast. Because I kind of went off on
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  Speaker 1: how bad it was in the sad state that is
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  Speaker 1: comedies in theaters. Coming in at number three is a
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  Speaker 1: three way tie, and it is three terrible horror films
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  Speaker 1: that I just completely kind of forgot existed, and they
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  Speaker 1: are Watchers, which was directed by the daughter of m
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  Speaker 1: Night Shyamalan, Nepo Baby Imaginary, which was laughably bad, and Terror,
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  Speaker 1: which I don't remember. I legitimately don't remember and had
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  Speaker 1: to actually look up the plot synopsis for this movie
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  Speaker 1: because it was so forgettable. Borry horror movies can be great.
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  Speaker 1: We looked at my top five best of the year
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  Speaker 1: and I had Late Night with the Devil and the
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  Speaker 1: Substance as one and two. So I love horror movies,
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  Speaker 1: but they can also be so bad, and they are
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  Speaker 1: very cheap to make, and a lot of the times
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  Speaker 1: you get inexperienced actors, people that are just starting off,
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  Speaker 1: or maybe people that are way past their prime. That
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  Speaker 1: is what you get with a lot of horror movies, unfortunately,
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  Speaker 1: and there's companies like Blumhouse that just put out movie
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  Speaker 1: after movie after movie, and they do this because they
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  Speaker 1: only have to make so little amount of money. You
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  Speaker 1: make a movie that cost them million dollars two million dollars,
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  Speaker 1: which a lot of these movies do. It only has
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  Speaker 1: to make five or six million dollars to that of profit.
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  Speaker 1: So that's why they keep on cranking these out. So
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  Speaker 1: best bet is to just skip all three of those
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  Speaker 1: and try and watch something that stimulates your brain, something
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  Speaker 1: like The Substance, something like Late Night with the Devil.
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  Speaker 1: Those would be two horror movies from twenty twenty four
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  Speaker 1: that I do recommend, but definitely stick away from watchers.
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  Speaker 1: Tarot and Imaginary. Coming in at number two. Worst movie
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  Speaker 1: of twenty twenty four would be Madam Webb, I'm Gonna
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  Speaker 1: help you out today.
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  Speaker 2: Okay, trying to save people who are running out of
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  Speaker 2: it until one moment changed everything.
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  Speaker 1: All the memes that you've seen about this movie, they're true.
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  Speaker 1: They're all true. It's a horrible script, it's an ugly
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  Speaker 1: looking movie. There's terrible action sequences, and it's really mind boggling.
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  Speaker 1: Like I understand why they made those crappy horror movies.
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  Speaker 1: I can understand that because they're cheap. Like I said,
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  Speaker 1: Madam Web wasn't cheap. Madim Web is mind boggling. That
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  Speaker 1: producers saw the final script and said, yep, let's go
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  Speaker 1: with that, and then you have awful acting. Now. I
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  Speaker 1: don't know if this is a case of just the
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  Speaker 1: bad script, because I think the lead actress is just
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  Speaker 1: a terrible another NEPO baby, Dakota Johnson. She's just she's
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  Speaker 1: very robotic and very inorganic, and she doesn't seem human
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  Speaker 1: at all the way she delivers her line. So she
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  Speaker 1: is laughably bad. There are so many moments. There are
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  Speaker 1: moments in this movie that you can actually have fun with.
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  Speaker 1: I think my favorite aspect of this Madam Web movie
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  Speaker 1: is they keep on hinting of the Spider Man universe,
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  Speaker 1: because this is set in that Sony Spider Man universe.
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  Speaker 1: It's very complicated, the financial reasons and the legal reasons
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  Speaker 1: as to who owns what, and you know what, what
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  Speaker 1: is Sony doing with these non Spider Man Spider Man movies?
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  Speaker 1: It's does anybody want these movies? Why they keep on
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  Speaker 1: making them? I know some people like the Venom movies,
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  Speaker 1: which I don't understand. I think those are absolute trash also,
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  Speaker 1: but who is asking for movies like Morbius? Who's asking
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  Speaker 1: for movies like Craven The Hunter? And Madame Webb is
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  Speaker 1: the worst of all of those. And they keep on
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  Speaker 1: hinting at Uncle Ben throughout this movie. Uncle Ben, the
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  Speaker 1: famous Uncle Ben, Uncle Ben to Peter, and they keep
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  Speaker 1: on hinting at it, and then they reveal it at
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  Speaker 1: the end as if it's some surprise, because they keep
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  Speaker 1: on saying, Oh, you're gonna be an Uncle Ben, You're
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  Speaker 1: gonna Ben Ben, you might be an uncle at the
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  Speaker 1: end of this movie, and then he becomes an uncle
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  Speaker 1: and then you're supposed to be like, oh, uncle Ben
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  Speaker 1: is Uncle Ben. I didn't know that. In this Spider
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  Speaker 1: Man Universe movie, Wow, shocking, terrible, terrible film and coming
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  Speaker 1: in number one is a tie Megalopolis and Borderlands. Hollywood
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  Speaker 1: has always had an issue with adapting video games into movies. Now,
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  Speaker 1: I've never played the Borderlands game before, but I don't
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  Speaker 1: think that matters. I think if you're making a movie,
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  Speaker 1: it just needs to be a movie. Yeah, you can
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  Speaker 1: have some fan service ad, a little you know, character
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  Speaker 1: here and there, a moment that is from the game
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  Speaker 1: that can make people happy that are watching the movie.
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  Speaker 1: But at the end of the day, you have to
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  Speaker 1: make a movie that makes sense to people that haven't
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  Speaker 1: played the game. I don't think that matters though, because
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  Speaker 1: fans of this series did not like the movie at all,
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  Speaker 1: and I in fact hated it. I'm gonna make it
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  Speaker 1: right with your body parts, would I tell you? Minimal
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  Speaker 1: said no explosions. I don't know where this film's budget went,
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  Speaker 1: because it costs upwards of one hundred and twenty million
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  Speaker 1: dollars to make this film only making thirty three million dollars.
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  Speaker 1: And I've talked about it if few times on this
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  Speaker 1: podcast that just because the production budget is one hundred
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  Speaker 1: and twenty million dollars, that does not mean that's what
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  Speaker 1: the movie costs. This movie probably costs upwards of two
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  Speaker 1: hundred million dollars to make based on advertising, so it
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  Speaker 1: lost the company Lionsgate almost one hundred and seventy five
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  Speaker 1: million dollars. It tried to copy the formula of so
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  Speaker 1: many successful movies. I think mainly the Guardians of the
• 12:25
  Speaker 1: Galaxy movie. You know, this ragtag group of individuals that
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  Speaker 1: are set on a quest. They're not really morally good,
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  Speaker 1: but at the end of the day, they do have
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  Speaker 1: morals and they are gonna, you know, do what's right,
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  Speaker 1: and it it just falls flat. I mean Suicide Squad
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  Speaker 1: tried to do the same thing. You copy something and
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  Speaker 1: people see right through it. And audiences didn't want to
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  Speaker 1: go to the theaters to watch this, and I don't
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  Speaker 1: blame them because it was terrible. It was ugly, it
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  Speaker 1: was lazy, the plot made no sense, the acting was horrendous.
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  Speaker 1: I'm sick of Jack Black voicing things. Just an unnecessary
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  Speaker 1: movie and a property. I mean, who's talking about Borderlands?
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  Speaker 1: I don't know anybody that plays this series. Maybe I'm
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  Speaker 1: in the minority when it comes to that one. But
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  Speaker 1: it ain't Super Mario Brothers, it ain't Sonic the hedge Hog,
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  Speaker 1: it ain't even Mortal Kombat. Who is asking for a
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  Speaker 1: Borderlands movie? No one. That's why it's the number one
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  Speaker 1: worst of the year, tied with Megalopolis. Now, Megalopolis is
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  Speaker 1: one of those movies I actually wouldn't mind watching again
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  Speaker 1: because it was so mind bogglingly stupid. From visionary writer
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  Speaker 1: and director Francis Ford Coppola, comes an event nothing can
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  Speaker 1: prepare you for.
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  Speaker 2: Imagine today's society as a branch of civilization about to
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  Speaker 2: reach a dead end. Is this way we're living the
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  Speaker 2: only one that's available to us?
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  Speaker 1: You get a great cast. Adam Driver, Shilah Buff, John Voyd,
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  Speaker 1: Dustin Hoffman. I mean, these are some of the best
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  Speaker 1: actors of all time. On top of that, you have
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  Speaker 1: Francis Ford Cope, who's made some of the greatest movies
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  Speaker 1: of all time. You want to talk about an ugly
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  Speaker 1: looking movie. I don't know where this film's budget went.
• 14:07
  Speaker 1: I have no idea, because it looks like something a
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  Speaker 1: YouTuber could create. The green screen effects looks like something
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  Speaker 1: that the angry video game nerd could create in a
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  Speaker 1: YouTube video. Some of the acting choices were bizarre, to
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  Speaker 1: say the least. I don't know if they just said,
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  Speaker 1: Shilah Buff, do what you want to do, We're not
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  Speaker 1: really going to direct you. But I'm fascinated with this movie.
• 14:31
  Speaker 1: I can't help it. I'm so fascinated with a director
• 14:35
  Speaker 1: who made The Godfather is making something like this. Does
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  Speaker 1: he need to go into an old folks home? Is
• 14:41
  Speaker 1: he all there? Mentally? I have no idea. You want
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  Speaker 1: to talk about a movie that was an absolute bomb.
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  Speaker 1: This one cost upwards of one hundred and thirty six
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  Speaker 1: million dollars to just do the production budget, and it
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  Speaker 1: made a little over fourteen million dollars and Francis Ford
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  Speaker 1: Coppola he was putting his own money into this. You know,
• 15:01
  Speaker 1: he's made a lot of money over the years with
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  Speaker 1: his wine, and he decided, I'm going to make this movie.
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  Speaker 1: I want to make this movie for years, and I
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: don't really know why. Why would he choose to do this.
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  Speaker 1: Apparently this is a movie he's had the idea for
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  Speaker 1: for decades, and maybe there's some symbolism there. Maybe there's
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  Speaker 1: something deep down. Years from now, some scholar will find
• 15:24
  Speaker 1: the deeper meaning in this movie. I highly doubt it,
• 15:28
  Speaker 1: but I don't know. Maybe I'm just holding out hope
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: because the guy directed Apocalypse now. But maybe, you know,
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: forty fifty years from now, people will look back at
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  Speaker 1: this movie and be like, oh, actually it was a
• 15:36
  Speaker 1: genius film. I highly doubt it, but it is one
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  Speaker 1: of those movies that I would actually want to watch
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: a documentary or a biopick of Francis Ford Coppola making
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: this movie. I think it's so fascinating that a guy's
• 15:49
  Speaker 1: willing to risk it all and put his money on
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: the line and make an absolute laughing stock of a movie.
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: So shout out to Francis Ford Coppola. So out of
• 15:57
  Speaker 1: these movies, I would recommend really only watching Madam Webb
• 16:01
  Speaker 1: and Megalopolis just for the sheer stupidity. The rest are
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  Speaker 1: just lazy and boring and ugly and uninspired. But I
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  Speaker 1: think there is something fun that you could have. Have
• 16:11
  Speaker 1: a few drinks and watch Megalopolis, you know, maybe smoke
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: some pot and watch Madam web I think there is
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  Speaker 1: some fun to be had with bad movies. But these
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  Speaker 1: were just some of the worst films of twenty twenty four.
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  Speaker 1: So hopefully twenty twenty five is a better year. Hopefully
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  Speaker 1: we have less stinkers, less duds. But I doubt it.
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  Speaker 1: This has been film real. My name is Justin.
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  Speaker 2: So long everyone,